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The Significant Events of Our Lives with Reg Malhotra · The Trauma Therapist

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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Trauma Tapis Podcast. My name is Gamick
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Speaker 1: person I interview incredible people who dedicated their lives to
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Speaker 1: helping those have been impacted by trauma.
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Speaker 2: Here we go, I was just here. Hear me, Yes,
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Speaker 2: I can.
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Speaker 3: Okay, hold on you.
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Speaker 4: We're in the middle of a starting a training in
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Speaker 4: about an hour, so can you see me?
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Speaker 3: Okay, yes, I understand here.
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Speaker 4: This is my studio because we've been doing the event
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Speaker 4: from If you think it's a bit too much, I
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Speaker 4: can go to like a quieter you know, typical podcast setting.
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Speaker 1: Uh no, it's well, it's so it's not too much.
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Speaker 1: The only question is in terms of consistency. You know,
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Speaker 1: I'm sitting here with my head and you've got your
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Speaker 1: whole body.
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Speaker 4: I can I can sit down here actually because this
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Speaker 4: is where I teach from.
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Speaker 1: Okay, that would be better that Yeah, that.
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Speaker 3: My body shows up more than yours, that's all.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that's that's better. Easier. Good to see you, sir,
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Speaker 1: You too, You two guy.
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Speaker 3: How are you doing?
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Speaker 1: I'm doing great. Thanks so much for taking the time
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Speaker 1: to do this. We'll have you. We'll go thirty minutes,
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Speaker 1: thirty one minutes, thirty two minutes and then we'll be done.
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Speaker 1: But super excited to meet you and talk to you
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Speaker 1: and love what you're doing. Yeah. So thirty minutes towards
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Speaker 1: the end, when I get down to asking what's the
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Speaker 1: best way for people to learn more about you, that'll
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Speaker 1: be an indication that we're getting ready to close out. Okay,
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Speaker 1: so once we do close out, just hang on so
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Speaker 1: I could say goodbye.
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Speaker 3: Now, any questions for me, No, in terms I've been
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Speaker 3: doing a few of these.
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Speaker 4: In terms of the style, I've found my style, which
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Speaker 4: is you take me wherever you want to take me.
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Speaker 3: I'm a very big Q and a guy in general.
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Speaker 4: Okay, if you like some that I said, or if
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Speaker 4: you curious, just take me down that road, great, But generally,
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Speaker 4: you know, kind of on the fly type of style
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Speaker 4: is working really well for me because I'm very passionate
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Speaker 4: about my topic.
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Speaker 3: So something will come out that will be useful.
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Speaker 1: Love it, Love it sounds awesome? All right, So here
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Speaker 1: we go.
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Speaker 3: You ready, Yes, how's the sound called good?
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Speaker 1: That's much better? That was better? Yeah, all right, so
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Speaker 1: here we go. So five four, three, two and one,
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Speaker 1: our folks, welcome back to the podcast. Very excited to
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Speaker 1: have my guest today, Reg Malhotra, Reg welcome, great to
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Speaker 1: be here guy, Thank you awesome. So Reg founded Neuromasters Academy,
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Speaker 1: a leading personal development organization helping high performers regain their
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Speaker 1: drive and motivation. He overcame his own struggles and limitations
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Speaker 1: using rapid hypnotherapy as well as neuro linguistic programming or NLP.
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Speaker 1: Since founding Neuromasters, he has helped others achieve similar results,
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Speaker 1: making him a sought after expert in mental health and
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Speaker 1: personal development. As an internationally recognized speaker, coach, and trainer,
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Speaker 1: he's impacted over three hundred thousand people. His expertise is
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Speaker 1: transforming lives by helping clients regain focus, overcome trauma, and
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Speaker 1: eliminate self sabotage. All right, Rej, a lot there packed
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Speaker 1: in that little bio. But before we get going, share
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Speaker 1: with the listeners where you're from originally and where you
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Speaker 1: are currently.
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Speaker 3: So you mean location, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Speaker 4: So we're based out of Australia and you know, after
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Speaker 4: COVID well you know the COVID years, we expanded right
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Speaker 4: across the world and so we've been working with people
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Speaker 4: from across the world because we do a lot of
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Speaker 4: our programs online.
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Speaker 1: Okay, And where are you right now in Australia, right
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Speaker 1: now in Australia. Okay? Awesome, all right, So let's how
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Speaker 1: did this start for you? How did all this start
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Speaker 1: for you?
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Speaker 3: Sure look like a lot of people.
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Speaker 4: You know, I had my share of adversities growing up,
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Speaker 4: particularly in the Foundational years zero to seven, and you
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Speaker 4: know that the kind of adversities that leave you with
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Speaker 4: a void, you know. In my case, I had to
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Speaker 4: be moved to my grandparents, and you know, I had
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Speaker 4: what we didn't not in a long time, one of
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Speaker 4: my parents with a mental illness.
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Speaker 3: Right. So, growing up, you know, I.
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Speaker 4: Always felt that void of connection with a parent, you know,
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Speaker 4: and over the years it became bigger and bigger. And
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Speaker 4: I grew up and did the usual things, you know,
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Speaker 4: got some work, did well in there, got married, you know,
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Speaker 4: became a dad, all that sort of thing.
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Speaker 3: But there was something always bothering me.
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Speaker 4: There was resentment, there was anger, the usual things that
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Speaker 4: a lot of people go through. But for me, I
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Speaker 4: just kept searching. I kept seeking. I said, there is
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Speaker 4: something going on. I don't know what it is. And
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Speaker 4: it led me down different paths. A lot of learning
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Speaker 4: seminars courses, you know. And it wasn't until I landed
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Speaker 4: up in this modality, which is NLP hypnosis, that I
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Speaker 4: really really, really transformed in a huge way.
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Speaker 3: You know.
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Speaker 4: I met the version of me that I'd never met before,
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Speaker 4: and I got so excited about it that I couldn't
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Speaker 4: help it. And I started working with a lot of people,
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Speaker 4: and eventually I knew that I had to take it
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Speaker 4: out in a much bigger way, which is what gave
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Speaker 4: birth to neuro masters.
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Speaker 1: Okay, so you talked about growing up. Something was going
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Speaker 1: on you grew up. From what you said, it sounds
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Speaker 1: like you grew up in an environment where there was
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Speaker 1: lack of attachment from one or both of your parents,
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Speaker 1: and that can impact people many different ways. You said
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Speaker 1: there was a void, but talk a little more specifically
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Speaker 1: about how that did impact you growing up and then
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Speaker 1: beyond teen years and so forth.
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Speaker 4: Well, it impacted me in that I was, you know,
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Speaker 4: unable to form good relationships with people. I was fearful
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Speaker 4: of others, didn't trust myself, you know, I was, you know,
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Speaker 4: always questioning myself. I've had a lot of negative ideas
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Speaker 4: about myself, a lot of negative ideas.
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Speaker 3: I couldn't really show up in the way that I
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Speaker 3: wanted to.
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Speaker 4: I you know, there was there was some level of
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Speaker 4: emotional physical abuse as well at play. I became suicidal
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Speaker 4: at least on three occasions. I seriously contemplated taking my
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Speaker 4: own life. Couldn't succeeded that later I found out why.
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Speaker 3: So, so a lot.
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Speaker 4: Of a lot of you could say, trauma, a lot
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Speaker 4: of you know, inner pain, spiritual pain. You know, as
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Speaker 4: I look at that part of my life, you know,
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Speaker 4: it was a mess. It was a complete mess.
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Speaker 1: So how did you adapt? How did you cope?
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Speaker 3: Earlier with alcohol? Earlier with alcohol?
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Speaker 4: So it became you know, uh, it wasn't just the
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Speaker 4: od drink here and there. It was quite a lot
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Speaker 4: of alcohol. And this was even after I was I
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Speaker 4: was a parent, you know, in the early years that
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Speaker 4: became kind of what wasn't I wouldn't go to say
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Speaker 4: that I was addicted, but I was having a lot
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Speaker 4: just to get through.
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Speaker 3: And you know that there was a lot of warning
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Speaker 3: signs there as well that needed to overcome. There.
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Speaker 4: So combination of all of that, I kept a pretty
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Speaker 4: straight face. I must have made you look. From the outside,
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Speaker 4: I think people think everything is good you know, earning
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Speaker 4: good money, got a family and all that sort of thing.
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Speaker 4: But you know, you know when you know there's something
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Speaker 4: in right.
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Speaker 1: So okay, so that's a lot there. You move you're
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Speaker 1: working at this point, I'm sure what kind of job
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Speaker 1: were you doing?
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Speaker 3: Working in the corporate sector? Okay, financial industry.
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Speaker 1: So my guess is something something must have clicked or
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Speaker 1: shifted or transformed such that what did that look like?
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Speaker 1: Did you realize, holy crap, something's going on and need
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Speaker 1: to find out what's going on? I can't take this anymore?
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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, so I kind of condensed the story there,
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Speaker 4: but here are some of the missing pieces along the way.
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Speaker 4: I started a business, and you know, when you're running
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Speaker 4: something on your own, when everything depends on you, I
8:20
Speaker 4: see a lot of your issues come up on the surface, right,
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Speaker 4: A lot of your fears come up because now you're
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Speaker 4: not in that secure environment of you know, you know
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Speaker 4: you're going to get paid. And in the running of
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Speaker 4: that business, I realize a lot of things that weren't
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Speaker 4: going right, a lot of mistakes I was making, and
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Speaker 4: there was emotional outputs, right, So those kind of things,
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Speaker 4: and I started to become more aware, more conscious that
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Speaker 4: there is something I started to acknowledge, right that there
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Speaker 4: was self hate developing. There was you know, I started
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Speaker 4: to see all these ideas of people doing work and
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Speaker 4: personal development work, and it's just starting to look at
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Speaker 4: those things and you know, things coming up to the
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Speaker 4: surface to say I got to do something about it.
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Speaker 4: And in terms of specific events, there was some alcohol
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Speaker 4: related events that just made it a bit scary even
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Speaker 4: for myself. If I don't do something about this, something
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Speaker 4: wrong is going to happen, and that's gonna not only
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Speaker 4: haw myself, but it could hurt other people around us.
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Speaker 1: I mean, I appreciate you sharing that. Yeah, I mean,
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Speaker 1: this is we're all dealing with to one degree or another, right,
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Speaker 1: We're all dealing with this stuff, and I think it
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Speaker 1: really helps people. You know, when you share what you're sharing,
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Speaker 1: it helps us understand not just who you are, but
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Speaker 1: now the incredible work you're doing. So what happens next?
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Speaker 1: How do the things unfold such that you start getting
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Speaker 1: into you start growing and healing yourself. What does that
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Speaker 1: look like? Oh?
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Speaker 3: That was you know, it was quite painful to begin with.
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Speaker 4: You know, I remember I would go to these seminars
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Speaker 4: Guy and I would or I would go and you know,
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Speaker 4: learn something new, and I would go back to the
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Speaker 4: hotel room that night and I would just burst out crying.
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Speaker 3: I had no idea what was going on.
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Speaker 4: You know they say that process of you know, you
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Speaker 4: got to go go to go through the darkness to
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Speaker 4: see the light. I mean, I really did this, and
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Speaker 4: for my kids it was no less than three years.
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Speaker 3: I was.
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Speaker 4: I was hearing things that was and then you know
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Speaker 4: a lot of what I teach us about that what
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Speaker 4: is happening at the subconscious level?
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Speaker 3: What what are these ideas.
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Speaker 4: And these significant emotional events is a term that I use,
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Speaker 4: see significant emotional events from the past. That when you
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Speaker 4: hear things that connect right to events from the past,
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Speaker 4: your mind does what's called a transderrivational search, and it
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Speaker 4: tries to connect the information coming in with events from
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Speaker 4: your life, and that brings up emotions. So it was
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Speaker 4: a it wasn't a nice process. I mean, it wasn't
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Speaker 4: an easy process, but I knew things were changing and
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Speaker 4: I just get I just got so drawn to keep
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Speaker 4: going deeper and deeper, and my god, thank god I did.
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Speaker 1: So it sounds like, and correct me if I'm wrong here.
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Speaker 1: When you started that journey, that journey of learning and
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Speaker 1: trying to heal yourself. You knew there was something more
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Speaker 1: in you, right or help me find the language here?
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Speaker 1: You knew that, like, how the hell do I get
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Speaker 1: out of this? What was that sense or feeling you had?
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Speaker 4: I think it was for me. It didn't start with
11:36
Speaker 4: there was something more in me. It was driven more
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Speaker 4: by what could go wrong here. I was seeing my
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Speaker 4: emotional patterns, I was seeing my linguistic patterns. I was
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Speaker 4: seeing my behaviors, and I was seeing that I was
11:51
Speaker 4: you know, even though I would make that conscious resolve,
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Speaker 4: hey I won't do this, I won't say this eventually, I.
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Speaker 3: Would always go back to it.
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Speaker 4: And it happened more than enough times for me to
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Speaker 4: know nothing's gonna change here. I can keep putting a
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Speaker 4: strong front, you know that. You know that's saying everyone's
12:07
Speaker 4: fighting a battle we know nothing about, right? How many
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Speaker 4: people out there putting you know, smiling faces out there
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Speaker 4: and you know, just wanting others to think they're okay.
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Speaker 4: And I just couldn't find anyone to truly other than
12:22
Speaker 4: my wife of course, to truly confide. And there was
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Speaker 4: I didn't really understand the idea of getting therapy. I
12:28
Speaker 4: didn't go in that direction. For me, it was a
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Speaker 4: combination of, Hey, if I don't do something about this,
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Speaker 4: something's gonna go wrong. I'm gonna end up literally like
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Speaker 4: losing everything that I've created here. So it started from that,
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Speaker 4: and later on it became like, oh my god, like,
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Speaker 4: there is so much more to me than I've been recognizing.
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Speaker 4: That came through the journey.
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Speaker 1: So you start attending all these these workshops and courses,
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Speaker 1: et cetera, going to your health going to your hotel.
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Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not laughing at that, but that you
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Speaker 1: painted a very picture there, the darkness walk us through.
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Speaker 1: How do things start evolving such that you're like this,
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Speaker 1: whatever it was, hypnotherapy or NLP, something was clicking for you.
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Speaker 3: Yeah.
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Speaker 4: So a lot of the work that I was doing
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Speaker 4: was about disconnecting emotions from significant emotional events from the past.
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Speaker 4: Now when you go in that territory, it's it's not
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Speaker 4: like therapy. You don't sit there and talk about your events,
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Speaker 4: but it is it is the best thing of him,
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Speaker 4: like mechanical processes, visualization processes, that you can see that
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Speaker 4: event and now you no longer feel emotion about it.
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Speaker 3: You can literally watch it like a movie.
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Speaker 4: But when you do this kind of work and you're
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Speaker 4: in solitude, you're alone. I noticed a pattern. Things would
13:45
Speaker 4: come up, you know, later at night. And I'll give
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Speaker 4: you an example. One time I was in a seminar.
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Speaker 4: A seminar leader said, you know you chose your parents
13:54
Speaker 4: in advance. Like you're listening to it consciously, you can
13:59
Speaker 4: entirely make sense of it, right, the words sit inside
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Speaker 4: your neurology. And then something would come up later that
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Speaker 4: night and I would just, yeah, I be.
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Speaker 3: Honest about it.
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Speaker 4: I would I would literally just end up in tears, sobbing,
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Speaker 4: and I couldn't really put my finger as to what
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Speaker 4: was going on. But little did I know that I
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Speaker 4: think there was. There was just compounded healing occurring. There
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Speaker 4: was something leaving the system, as I say, and something
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Speaker 4: new coming in.
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Speaker 1: So were these courses or workshops or seminars, were they
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Speaker 1: on hypnotherapy and NLP or what they were?
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Speaker 4: You know, they would sometimes they would be about mindset,
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Speaker 4: they would be about you know, getting more out of yourself.
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Speaker 4: But a lot of these references were thrown in and
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Speaker 4: then I eventually found hypnotherapy and NP and you know
14:45
Speaker 4: that was I love that because it was showing me
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Speaker 4: actual results, Like I could see that I don't get
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Speaker 4: triggered by this thing. I could see that I can
14:53
Speaker 4: use my mind to create an idea and feel different
14:57
Speaker 4: instantly on demand. I could see that I had a
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Speaker 4: limit decision limiting belief come up and I could get
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Speaker 4: rid of it. So I like that part of it
15:04
Speaker 4: a lot. That's why God who does Okay, I can
15:06
Speaker 4: actually see results and they are measurable.
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Speaker 1: So give us a little thumbnail of what hypno therapy
15:15
Speaker 1: is because I think we'll all have heard it. Some
15:18
Speaker 1: people have maybe an idea, But how do you define it?
15:21
Speaker 1: How do you describe it?
15:23
Speaker 3: Look, yeah, that's a great question.
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Speaker 4: There's a lot of misunderstandings, you know, and a lot
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Speaker 4: of fears if you will, of these ideas.
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Speaker 3: But to me, it's very simple.
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Speaker 4: You have an intelligence, let's call it the subconscious mind, right.
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Speaker 4: This is where you're storing all the emotions, storing all
15:39
Speaker 4: the information.
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Speaker 3: You know. It helps give you the programs. If you
15:42
Speaker 3: do something enough times.
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Speaker 4: You know, one university says it's twenty one days, someone
15:46
Speaker 4: says it's sixty days.
15:47
Speaker 3: Whatever it is.
15:48
Speaker 4: If you do something enough times, you create a program.
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Speaker 4: It's held at the subconscious level, so you don't have
15:53
Speaker 4: to think about it consciously. So there is a separation,
15:56
Speaker 4: let's say, between the two minds, your conscious mind you're
15:58
Speaker 4: thinking logical mind like I'm going to go to the gym.
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Speaker 4: That's your conscious mind saying it. But for you to
16:05
Speaker 4: develop that as a habit, you know, you have to
16:07
Speaker 4: do it enough times, and you have to think about
16:10
Speaker 4: it enough and have emotional intensity of it and will happen.
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Speaker 4: So hypnosis is simply bypassing the conscious mind right in
16:17
Speaker 4: a state of complete relaxation, so you you know, your
16:21
Speaker 4: little chattering mind is not coming in the way. No
16:23
Speaker 4: over analysis, no you know, criticism, no judgments, and it
16:26
Speaker 4: bypasses it and reaches the area where changes are made fast.
16:30
Speaker 4: I mean, you think about it a smoker letting go
16:34
Speaker 4: of smoking. It's a program, right, a pack a day
16:38
Speaker 4: for twenty years and lets it go in two hours
16:42
Speaker 4: and never wants to touch it again.
16:43
Speaker 3: How do you explain that?
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Speaker 4: So, in a state of relaxation, you are more open
16:50
Speaker 4: to accepting certain ideas, including ideas about yourself, and once
16:54
Speaker 4: they are accepted, you produce behaviors in line with the
16:58
Speaker 4: new identity.
16:59
Speaker 3: New such estions as opposed to the old. So it's
17:02
Speaker 3: very powerful.
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Speaker 1: So talk a little bit about yourself. How did you
17:07
Speaker 1: start changing yourself in a sense.
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Speaker 4: So I would use hypnosis to overcome certain behaviors, certain
17:15
Speaker 4: patterns like alcohol, like even behavioral patterns, build suggestions and
17:21
Speaker 4: record my own hypnosis or sit with the hypnosis practitioner.
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Speaker 3: I also use it.
17:26
Speaker 4: To improve my performance, overcome procrastination, get clear on where
17:31
Speaker 4: I'm going on my goals. So it has you know,
17:33
Speaker 4: if one aspect is about where you're going, and one
17:36
Speaker 4: aspect is about what you want to leave behind unwanted behaviors,
17:40
Speaker 4: you know, to create more discipline. And there is a
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Speaker 4: form of hypnosis that is within the context of NLP
17:47
Speaker 4: that allows you to disconnect from your past. I have
17:52
Speaker 4: a concept called the energy cube. I go go through
17:55
Speaker 4: it in my book The Energy Keep.
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Speaker 3: Secret that throughout your life.
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Speaker 4: Right, you go through these significant emotional events and if
18:02
Speaker 4: you can think of an event now and you can
18:05
Speaker 4: feel emotions in your body, then the event is still alive.
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Speaker 3: It's showing up energy that you need for the future.
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Speaker 3: I've worked with people that I've I've worked with thousands
18:13
Speaker 3: of people. I can tell you.
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Speaker 4: But tons of people have literally like no less than
18:18
Speaker 4: thirty forty major significant emotional events, and then they're thinking
18:22
Speaker 4: about it, they're talking about it, they're probably dreaming about it.
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Speaker 4: There's not enough energy available to move forward, to create.
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Speaker 4: You need energy to create, to create a family, to
18:32
Speaker 4: create joy, to create business.
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Speaker 3: How can you do that? Then?
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Speaker 4: If you can think of a past event and feel
18:38
Speaker 4: emotions in your body, it's alive and it needs energy
18:42
Speaker 4: to be alive. Submit it very simple to understand this.
18:46
Speaker 1: Well. I think this brings up kind of the obvious
18:50
Speaker 1: choice here, which is trauma. I mean a lot of
18:53
Speaker 1: people who are listening to this or therapists or survivors
18:56
Speaker 1: or whatnot. And obviously that comes up for lot of people.
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Speaker 1: So what's the difference here between you said you didn't
19:05
Speaker 1: get into go down the therapy route, But what is
19:09
Speaker 1: the difference from your mind between like therapy and what
19:15
Speaker 1: you are offering or what you do or the work
19:17
Speaker 1: you did on yourself.
19:19
Speaker 3: So a couple of key differences with the work we do.
19:22
Speaker 4: It comes in the broader category of coaching, right, and
19:26
Speaker 4: a lot of coaching is about moving.
19:28
Speaker 3: Forward, It's about the focus.
19:30
Speaker 4: So a lot of what we do is considered generative
19:33
Speaker 4: as opposed to remedial. That so we say it's generative
19:36
Speaker 4: instead of being remedial. It doesn't start with the basis
19:39
Speaker 4: that the person is broken and needs fixing. What we
19:43
Speaker 4: do is is that you know a person, you know.
19:48
Speaker 4: It's about curiosity and adaptation. It's about moving them forward
19:52
Speaker 4: and the processes themselves. The key difference guy is there's
19:56
Speaker 4: not a lot of discussion on.
19:58
Speaker 3: The detail of what happened, doesn't require that.
20:02
Speaker 4: It's specific visualization processes and imagination processes, active imagination, and
20:09
Speaker 4: it uses you know, the idea of gestall which is
20:12
Speaker 4: also used in gestorllal therapy though, but it's dissociating, disconnecting
20:17
Speaker 4: with the events in the first place, to reframe to
20:21
Speaker 4: grave new meanings to the events. And the only time
20:25
Speaker 4: we send the person back into the event in their imagination,
20:28
Speaker 4: of course, in their mind, is only to test. So
20:32
Speaker 4: in our work it's not about reliving and it's not
20:35
Speaker 4: about regression.
20:37
Speaker 3: It's actually quite the opposite.
20:39
Speaker 4: Can you observe the event from far, can you look
20:41
Speaker 4: at it from different perspectives, get new meanings, new perspectives,
20:45
Speaker 4: and then go inside to test if your body respondise.
20:49
Speaker 3: See the body never lies.
20:51
Speaker 1: So when did you decide that you wanted to start
20:57
Speaker 1: doing this work and found your company? When did that start?
21:02
Speaker 1: How did that start?
21:04
Speaker 4: So when when I did this for myself, the results
21:07
Speaker 4: were measurable. I was seeing results in every area of
21:09
Speaker 4: my life, my relationships, my financial situation, clarity over my life,
21:14
Speaker 4: clarity of my goals.
21:16
Speaker 3: I said, I can't help it. That's not how I started.
21:18
Speaker 3: I'm going to offer this to work with other people.
21:20
Speaker 4: So I started working with a lot of business owners
21:23
Speaker 4: and you know, literally I had a ninety nine point
21:26
Speaker 4: nine percent success right in that whoever I worked with
21:29
Speaker 4: was coming back to saying, this has been incredible. And
21:32
Speaker 4: so it was a case guy, I just Okay, this
21:34
Speaker 4: is too fulfilling for me, too rewarding, I like, And
21:40
Speaker 4: so I couldn't help myself. I was just reaching out
21:42
Speaker 4: to people. I said I can do this and would
21:43
Speaker 4: you like to experience it? And I worked with a
21:45
Speaker 4: lot of people and yeah, it became clear I need
21:49
Speaker 4: to find a way to not only do more of this,
21:52
Speaker 4: but also to teach it. So now I actually teach
21:55
Speaker 4: and I trained and I certify people to do this
21:58
Speaker 4: work with others amongst other things.
22:00
Speaker 1: So so, I mean, I think a lot of us
22:05
Speaker 1: hear about people who've done what you do. I mean,
22:11
Speaker 1: there are coaches out there. So does someone ever say
22:15
Speaker 1: to you, REDG, you know it's great what you've done,
22:19
Speaker 1: but you I couldn't do that. I couldn't do what
22:22
Speaker 1: you do. You're special, you're superhuman, You're you're just you
22:28
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, You're I couldn't do it. What's
22:31
Speaker 1: your response.
22:31
Speaker 4: To that, Well that we call that a limiting belief.
22:37
Speaker 4: I would refer to it as a you have made
22:40
Speaker 4: a conscious or an unconscious decision. So from our modality,
22:44
Speaker 4: we treat all doubts as limiting decisions, whether it's true
22:48
Speaker 4: or not, as irrelevant. If you said to me, reg
22:50
Speaker 4: I cannot speak on stage, I will say, when did
22:53
Speaker 4: you decide that?
22:55
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
22:56
Speaker 4: Now there is a lot of meaning behind that question.
23:01
Speaker 4: We make conscious and unconscious decisions. I'll give you a
23:03
Speaker 4: small example another high school. I went an audition for singing.
23:07
Speaker 4: I had no idea how to sing. But like there's
23:09
Speaker 4: addition going on. I'll go an audition, I go up
23:12
Speaker 4: to this stage. I have no idea how to hold
23:15
Speaker 4: a microphone in those days you know you're gonna have
23:17
Speaker 4: to hold it near the chin, and I've held it
23:19
Speaker 4: like that.
23:20
Speaker 3: It was so bad.
23:21
Speaker 4: It was so loud, the speakers screeched, and you know,
23:25
Speaker 4: the worst thing that can happen to a high school
23:27
Speaker 4: boy is a bunch of girls laughing in the back.
23:29
Speaker 3: It was, you know, it was a terrible day.
23:33
Speaker 4: I felt a cocktail of emotions right as I look back, hurt, sadness,
23:39
Speaker 4: perhaps even anger. Now we call that that potentially a
23:43
Speaker 4: significant emotionally event occurred there, and it is possible that
23:45
Speaker 4: I made a decision, maybe not conscious to me, that
23:48
Speaker 4: I cannot speak in front of groups or I cannot
23:50
Speaker 4: show up on a stage. I know that because for
23:54
Speaker 4: fifteen years after that, I would refuse any opportunity to
23:58
Speaker 4: be in front of groups of people. Little did I
24:00
Speaker 4: know that this was part of my purpose in life.
24:02
Speaker 4: So what I'm trying to say here is there is
24:05
Speaker 4: a limiting decision made. If we can find the event
24:08
Speaker 4: where the decision was made, and we can go and
24:12
Speaker 4: remove the emotions from the event and change the meaning,
24:15
Speaker 4: the limiting decision disappears. So that's how we treated in
24:18
Speaker 4: our modality. A lot of people say I'm like, okay.
24:21
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, and we'll have that linked up here at
24:23
Speaker 1: the show notes page at the Trauma Therapist podcast dot com. Reg.
24:27
Speaker 1: Super inspiring. Appreciate you taking the time to do this,
24:31
Speaker 1: and you got me going, man, I'm like seriously, it's like,
24:37
Speaker 1: I just feel like so many of us live small,
24:42
Speaker 1: you know, and we have so many limiting beliefs, so
24:47
Speaker 1: this is exciting for me. All right, love it all right, Reg,
24:54
Speaker 1: thanks so much. We'll be in touch. Take care. There
25:00
Speaker 1: are composition is s