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Three Billy Goats Buff | Three Billy Goats Gruff Fairy Tale Retold | Stories for Kids · Dorktales Storytime | Stories for Kids Who Love Big Adventures

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_01: Hello, Dork Squad.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_01: I'm Jonathan Cormer, and you're listening to Dork Tales Storytime, the podcast for kids and their pop culture loving grown-ups.
• 0:14
  Theme Song: It's a beautiful day for a story, adventure, and glory, new friends and old ones, too.
• 0:21
  Theme Song: It's an excellent day to get swept away in a tale, so let us regale you ninety ninety one ninety two ninety-three ninety-four Oh uh high Regy six Uh Whatcha doin'?
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: What ninety seven?
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_01: Does ninety-eight?
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's ninety-nine look like one hundred I mean I guess it looks like you're doing sit-ups.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_01: Should I rephrase my question?
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_01: Go ahead, mate.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_01: I'm taking a breather.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_01: Why are you doing sit-ups?
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_01: Ah, that's a great question, my boy.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, sorry, I I need a splash of water.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_01: Ah There, I was parched, hmm.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm patiently awaiting your answer.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yes, right, of course.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I was working out.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_01: Working out?
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_01: You know that social media website that all my bird friends use to share their opinions in 250 chirps or fewer?
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: Uh what was it called again?
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: Hm it's on the tip of your tongue, is it?
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: Uh Tweeter?
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_01: Uh close.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_01: It's Finchbook.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_01: Aha Yeah.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: Well, what does that have to do with sit-ups?
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I'm taking part in a workout challenge.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone exercises, and the animal who comes out the strongest by the end of the month gets bragging rights.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_01: Oh wow.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_01: Uh that sounds like a fun challenge.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: It is.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_01: It And you're still doing it.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, I didn't know you can lift such a large dumbbell.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_01: I can squat twice my body weight.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: I'm no leafcutter ant, though.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: Well, is it okay if I tell you a story as you uh continue training?
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_01: Ah of course, mate.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_01: I welcome your company.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_01: Great.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_01: But I must warn you, my mind is quite fixated on athletics today.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh Yes, I failed to mention the challenge started last month, and it ends well tonight.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_01: So the only chance I have at winning is remaining focused in these final hours.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that's quite a coincidence.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: A coincidence, you say?
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, your challenge with the other woodland critters goes along perfectly with today's story.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_01: Oh is that so?
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_01: I adore a good theme.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_01: Theme parties, theme decor, theme costumes And now a theme story.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_01: Today I'm telling the tale of the three Billy Goats Gruff.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_01: Em what about Buff?
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_01: Ooh, I like it.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: The three Billy Goats Buff Perfection Great.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_01: So here goes.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_01: Once upon a time, there were three billy goats with the last name Gr uh Buff.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_01: Let's just say the three goat siblings.
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_01: Sounds fair.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'll do a push-up for each.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_01: One, two, three! You better keep going, Reg, if you want to win your Finchbook challenge.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_01: Uh Righto.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_01: Four five?
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_01: Six! So the three goat siblings wanted to climb up a hill.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_01: Nine ten! That sounds like good exercise.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: And the top of that hill was covered in the sweetest clover they all wanted to eat, so they'd be strong and healthy.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_01: It is always important that animals and people and people try to stay active and eat what feels right for their bodies, so they're healthy and strong.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_01: Which is the point of my challenge.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: I couldn't agree more, Reg.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_01: So the goat siblings wanted to get to the top of the hill and eat the tastiest clover.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_01: Who and speaking of snacks, it's snack break time.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_01: Ah yes.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_01: Never work out without proper nutrition and hydration.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_01: Here, eat these almonds I keep in my pocket for moments like this.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_01: What?
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: Pocket almonds always come through in a pinch.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_01: And I fear I've pinched my back doing sit-ups.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, don't push yourself too hard, buddy.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_01: Just listen to the story.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_01: Ooh, alright.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: I can always pause for snack time.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_01: So, the three goats set out for the hill.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: But there was one obstacle in their path.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_01: Ugh, they didn't begin the challenge on the last day, did they?
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_01: Uh nope, but there was a bridge crossing a river on their path, and under that bridge lived a very hungry troll.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no! And the goats decided to cross the bridge one by one.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_01: First up, the youngest of the goat siblings.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: I certainly hope the troll was friendly.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_01: More like hungry.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_01: Uh-oh.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_01: Uh-oh is right.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_01: As the youngest sibling trotted across the bridge, his hooves went trip trap trip trap trip trap, and the troll swung his long, sinewy arm across the young goat's path, dragging his stout and bumpy body up, gnashing his terrible teeth, and shouting, Who's that trip trap trotting across my bridge?
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_01: His eyes landed on the youngest goat.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_06: Hmm Yum a goat for my supper.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_06: I just love succulent goats.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_06: I'm going to gobble you up.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: He continued gnashing his teeth.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, does he have to continue?
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: That just sounds horrible.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_01: Well, he was horrible.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_01: He'd never brushed his teeth.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_01: He never took a bath, he never did much of anything.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_01: Ugh, how could one be so careless?
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: At least I complete challenges Right on the final day.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway, you're much nicer than a bridge troll.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_01: He ate goats just like that for years, and grew accustomed to snatching them from the bridge and gobbling them up.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_01: I shudder to think about it.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: Ah, but the young goat had a plan.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: You don't want to eat me I do What?
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: I don't No you see I'm going up the hillside with my siblings to eat all the clover so that we can grow strong and healthy.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm just the smallest goatling.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: You want someone much more filling than me.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: My older brother is next.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: Let me pass, and you can have him instead.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_01: The troll was stunned.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_01: No goat had ever advocated for their sibling to be eaten.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_01: The youngster might be crazy, but right.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_01: He was too hungry for such a small goatling.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_06: Oh all right.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_06: Be on your way, so I can eat the older goat.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_06: I see him coming now.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: And the youngest goat crossed over to the field of tasty clovers.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: Jonathan, this isn't right to give up a sibling like that.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, Reg, this should come as no surprise to you.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_01: Just like you haven't been doing your social media challenge for the past four weeks, some things are simply not how they appear.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: Wait for it.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: Oh all right.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_01: So along came the second goat crossing the bridge, a bit larger than his sibling.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_01: Trip trap, trip trap, trip trap and out swung the troll again.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_06: Who is trip trapping across my bridge?
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: It is I said the next goat, bravely.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_01: I'm going up the hill to munch on the tastiest clover ever, so that I may be healthy, strong, and happy.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_06: Oh no you're not.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_06: You're bigger than the last one.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_06: You'll be my supper as I gobble you up.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_01: He bellowed as he swung one of his long, sinewy arms to grab the second goat, but the second goat took a step away from his grasp and replied Oh no wait just one minute there, troll what?
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_01: Not very patient, is he?
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: Well he's a troll, what do you expect?
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_01: Good point.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_01: The second goat continued.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_01: If you eat me, you won't have nearly enough room in your belly for my sibling who's coming next A much larger and therefore a much greater dinner feast for you Ooh, he's so clever, playing to the troll's greed like that.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: These goat siblings are on top of it, and the troll decided to let the second goat go.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, you may pass.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_06: I can wait for the heartier one to get here.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_06: I want a full course supper, like I deserve.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: So the second goat trotted off to the other side of the bridge, and the biggest goat approached.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_01: Trip trap, trip trap went his louder, larger hooves across the wooden boards.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_01: And again the troll swung himself up to the biggest goat's path, drooling now, for he was very hungry.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I no longer am.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: Those almonds were filling.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just on the edge of my seat.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_01: No exercises while you listen to the end of the story?
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: I've lost all motivation.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just riveted by this tale.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: How will the third goat trick the hungry troll?
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_01: He won't.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: He won't Nope.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_01: So he's eaten that's disappointing.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_01: Ah, but Reg, you forget what I said.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_01: The smaller goats may have needed to trick the troll to escape, but their much larger brother had already grown big enough to face the troll using his strength.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my, maybe I should continue with the challenge.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_01: That's impressive.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_01: Back to push-ups.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_01: Where was I?
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_01: Twenty?
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_01: Twenty twenty one.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_01: So the biggest goat squared himself to the troll and began to recite a poem.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_01: True I bet the troll did not like that.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: No, the troll was so hungry and angry all at once.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_01: You mean hangry, right?
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_01: You're right.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_01: He was very hangry as he shouted I'm going to gobble you up.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: But the third goat calmly said I have two horns so stout.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_05: With them I'll thrust you ugly troll out.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_05: You'll fall from here to the river and stone.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_05: So you'll leave the bridge crossers all alone.
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_01: And with that, he headbutted the confused troll straight off the bridge.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_01: So you see, each of the three goats used their own personal strengths to keep each other safe.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_01: No fighting or scuffle.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I love that.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, the third goat trotted up to meet his siblings, and they all munched on sweet clover and laughed at how wisely they defeated the mean troll.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_01: I love how strength can come from your body and also your brain.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_01: The sibling goats were as clever as they were fit.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: Just like you.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_01: Don't push yourself too hard to win this challenge, Reg.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_01: What matters most is you give it your best effort.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_01: And next time, I'll try a little sooner than the final day.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: Good idea.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_01: Now what's so funny, good sir?
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, nothing.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I just love how our story was inspired by an animal social media challenge.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_01: Who would have thought?
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, yes, it is uh it is pretty silly.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_01: Animals on social media.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_01: Who?
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, it's not just animals on Finchbook and Twitter.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: Have you heard about the social media dance craze for clock enthusiasts?
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_01: You'll never guess what that's called.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_01: TikTok.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_01: How did you know?
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_01: Just clever, I guess.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_01: This has been a John in Character production.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_01: Today's story was written by Amy Thompson, edited by Molly Murphy, and performed by Jonathan Cormer.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_01: Sound recording and production by Jermaine Hamilton at Hamilton Studios.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_01: Reach out to us on Instagram or email us at DorkTalestorytime at gmail.com.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_01: Find links in the show notes or go to dorktalestorytime.com.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_01: Now, go be the hero of your own story, and we'll see you next once upon a time.
• 16:30
  Theme Song: So we had sent