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Transcript

God Pulled Me Out of the Fire: My Christian Testimony of Leaving a Toxic Relationship & Finding Healing · Girl, Date the Good Guy ™ | Healing After Heartbreak & A Toxic Relationship

• 0:00
  Sis, have you ever had a moment where you knew your life was about to change
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  forever? Where one decision would shift everything?
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  Where obedience to God meant leaving behind the life you had known for years?
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  Today, I'm continuing the story of the moment I finally walked away from the
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  toxic cycle I had lived in for 17 years.
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  And the moment I stepped into the unknown with nothing but faith.
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  Hey sis before we get into today's episode i
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  want to remind you about our facebook our private facebook
• 0:30
  community group aka the royal guard the link is in the show notes and it would
• 0:36
  bless me big if you could leave a review on apple podcast don't forget to follow
• 0:41
  the show so you don't miss any episodes and share this with the sister who needs
• 0:46
  encouragement today let's get into today's show.
• 0:51
  Hey sis, welcome back to another episode of Girl Date the Good Guy.
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  It's your girl, Emily, and thank you so much for being here with me today.
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  In the last episode, I shared how God began making a way for me to leave.
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  The eviction, the financial pressure, the Holy Spirit nudges,
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  the phone call to my brother that changed everything.
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  But what I hadn't shared yet is what it actually felt like the day that I left
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  and what followed afterwards.
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  Because freedom doesn't always feel victorious in the moment.
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  Sometimes it feels heartbreaking. The day finally came, the day I had to leave
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  my home, and I knew nothing would ever be the same again.
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  I was stepping into the unknown, not because I had a perfect plan,
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  but because I trusted God more than I trusted the chaos I had been living in.
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  And that's the moment many women get stuck. They stay in what's familiar,
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  because the unknown feels too scary.
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  But sis, familiar chaos will keep you stuck, for decades, if you let it.
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  Leaving toxic cycles is not glamorous.
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  It's messy, it's emotional, it's painful. But sometimes the bravest thing you
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  will ever do is walk away from what's breaking you, and choose peace instead.
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  In 2 Corinthians 5, 7, it says, For we walk by faith, not by sight.
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  I had no sight of the future, but I did have faith.
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  What I didn't realize at the time was that the moment I walked away,
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  God began restoring my life, not instantly, but intentionally.
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  Healing started, peace started returning, and slowly God began rebuilding the
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  parts of me that had been broken for years.
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  And sis, what happened next still amazes me, because once I finally got out
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  of the toxic cycle, God started doing something I never expected,
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  something that would eventually lead to this podcast, and the mission I now
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  carry to help women all over the world break free too.
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  I'm going to share that part of that story right now because what happened after
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  I left was the beginning of my royal return I was walking away from something
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  that nearly destroyed me And I was wondering god Could you rebuild what was lost?
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  This has been one of the most vulnerable series that I have ever shared with you.
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  But today, I want to talk about what God did after I walked away.
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  Because leaving the dead place wasn't the end of my story.
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  It was the beginning of my healing.
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  So here I am, the night before I was leaving the cycle, I so desperately wanted
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  to leave for so many years, 17 years.
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  17 years of pain, chaos, betrayal, and trying to hold something together that God never designed.
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  One day, I hope to share my whole story with you. The twists,
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  the turns, the chaos, the lies, the betrayal.
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  But for now, I feel led to lay that down and pick up what God is doing in my life right now.
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  The new things, the healing, the restoration, the good God guy.
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  Because, sis, God doesn't just pull you out of something. He pulls you out so he can rebuild you.
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  I didn't want to leave my daughters. That was never the plan.
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  I always saw us leaving together, starting a new life together, healing together.
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  But in that moment, I had no other choice.
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  And sometimes faith means trusting God's plan, even when it doesn't look like
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  the one you dreamed about.
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  I am still believing for restoration with them. I'm actually building this podcast,
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  this ministry, this mission, in hopes that one day it will financially provide
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  the stability and foundation for us to be reunited again.
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  Because God pulls you out so he can plant you on solid ground.
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  He heals you and he lays a new foundation, the right foundation,
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  the one he had for you all along.
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  During that season, God sent me someone who became such a blessing in my life, my good God guy.
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  His support during that time was like a drink of fresh water after being in the desert and,
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  We didn't have money, but we had each other. And honestly, that was one of the
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  most beautiful gifts God has ever given me.
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  He is strong, caring, loving, kind, gentle.
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  And I truly believe God brought him into my life right when I needed him most.
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  And you remember, I'm not married to my ex at this point. We have been divorced since 2012.
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  I have been celibate for 10 years. So just to get kind of the timeline right
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  for you, I was just stuck in the cycle of financial control.
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  So when he brought me, my good guy, it was absolutely the time I needed him most.
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  Because again, remember, we can trust God's timing. It is perfect.
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  My good guy and I, we built such a strong relationship long distance.
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  And I thank God for him every single day.
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  Ladies, what God has for you, I cannot express the connection I have with this
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  man, my best friend, my middle school crush.
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  God knew exactly what he was doing. He had a plan all along.
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  He knew that this beautiful man was gonna come back in my life 33 years later
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  at the very moment that I needed him the most.
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  Sis, you can trust God's plan. It is good. But even with that support,
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  I still needed time to heal.
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  When I arrived at my brother's house, I spent six months, six months crying,
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  releasing, riding through the pain, praying, asking God question after question.
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  And you know what? God answered.
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  Maybe not with every answer I thought I needed, but he gave me something greater.
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  Peace, clarity, understanding. Everything started to feel lighter.
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  My heart, my mind, my spirit. And as God nudged me forward, one step at a time,
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  the depression lifted, the pain began to soften, the sorrow started turning back into joy.
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  I laugh harder now. I cry deeper.
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  I open my arms to others because I understand the depth of pain.
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  I truly am a new creation, and I cannot thank God enough for the work He has done in my life.
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  Scripture says, Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.
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  The old has passed away. Behold, the new has come.
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  2 Corinthians 5.17 And sis, he has the same for you.
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  Whether you love Jesus or maybe you don't even know him yet,
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  he has a plan for your life that is so beautiful, it can redeem even the deepest pain.
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  Now, let me be honest with you. This journey isn't easy. It took me nearly a
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  full decade to heal from everything I experienced.
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  Now, that doesn't mean it's going to take you that long. But what it does mean is this.
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  Healing is a journey, but it is absolutely possible.
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  Anything is possible with God, right? Before we go, I want to tell you something
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  that happened this week.
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  Because God did something that reminded me again that He is guiding every step.
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  I had released my episode, Sis, this time to leave the dead places the other day.
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  And in that episode, I talked about a book someone gave me when I was leaving my toxic cycle.
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  The book was called Just Enough Light for the Step I'm On. And I read that book
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  in three days because I was desperate for direction.
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  I needed God to show me what steps to take next.
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  Well, this week, after my daughter left, I was crying out to God again.
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  I said, Father, when is everything going to change?
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  I've been through the fire, and I just want a house where my daughters and I can be reunited again.
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  A few weeks earlier, I had spoken to a co-worker about what he does outside
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  of work, and he said he interprets the Bible and writes literature.
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  And he asked if I would like to read something he wrote, and I said yes.
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  But I had completely forgotten about it until this week, the very same week my heart was broken.
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  He walked up to me and handed me a copy of his work. and sis,
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  you are not going to believe the name of the book. Are you ready?
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  Light for the path.
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  Come on. Isn't God good? Light for the path.
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  And the book that I received prior in that huge leap of faith that I took was
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  just enough light for the step I'm on. Come on.
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  God is so good.
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  He does it right when we need it.
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  And a reminder that he is lighting the next steps, not the whole staircase,
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  place, just the next step.
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  So sis, if you are leaving a dead place, if you are walking through healing,
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  if you feel like God is asking you to trust him in the dark, just remember this.
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  He doesn't have to show you the entire road.
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  He just promises to light the step you're standing on.
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  And if my story shows you anything, it's that God can take the deepest pain
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  of your life and turn it into purpose.
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  Sis, God still has good plans for you.
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  And I am a walking testimony that he is here and he is moving.
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  And just as he moved in my life, he will move in yours.
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  I love you so much. I'll talk to you soon. Bye for now.