Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Enneagram and Gift Giving for Each Personality Type Part #1

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Enneagram and Gift Giving for Each Personality Type Part #1 · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

0:01
SPEAKER_00: Does the gift buying process always feel a little stressful for you?
0:06
SPEAKER_00: Do you find yourself worrying about whether your friends and family will like the gift you got them?
0:10
SPEAKER_00: Is it meaningful?
0:11
SPEAKER_00: Is it what they want?
0:12
SPEAKER_00: Does it really express the value you place on your relationship?
0:16
SPEAKER_00: Well, after dozens of conversations, the consensus isn't.
0:21
SPEAKER_00: The number one struggle of gift buying is wondering if you will get the right gift for your favorite people.
0:27
SPEAKER_00: But don't worry, I'm here to take away some of the gift buying mystery and stress from this Christmas.
0:34
SPEAKER_00: For this special two-part podcast series, I've interviewed nine of my friends to represent their Enneagram type as it relates to the gift giving season.
0:44
SPEAKER_00: I asked each of my friends to share what kind of gifts are on their list, what they don't enjoy about the gift buying process, what they do enjoy about gift buying.
0:54
SPEAKER_00: I asked them to share a little bit about what they thought their love language is.
0:59
SPEAKER_00: Of course, because these are my people, our conversations varied in length and content, but I know you're going to love what you learn about each Enneagram type and their gift preferences.
1:10
SPEAKER_00: This year I've also recreated my Enneagram gift giving guide.
1:14
SPEAKER_00: It's a beautiful printout designed to help you understand what each type really wants and why their wish list looks the way it does.
1:21
SPEAKER_00: I've also added 10 customized gift tags that you can print and use for your one-of-a-kind selections this year.
1:28
SPEAKER_00: I know many of you have used my previous guide, which gave you some big wins for Christmases in the past, and you've mentioned you used it for gift shopping all year long.
1:38
SPEAKER_00: Snag this gift guide to get your shopping done a little earlier this year and be more confident that your friends and family will love their gift.
1:46
SPEAKER_00: Either click on the link in the show notes or check out simply wholehearted.com for all the information.
1:52
SPEAKER_00: I know you're going to want to share this episode with your friends and family to let them know a little bit more about your personality.
1:59
SPEAKER_00: And perhaps it'll start a fun conversation which will help you better understand their personality too.
2:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm Amy Wix and you are listening to the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.
2:18
SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the fifth advent season of the podcast created to help you prepare your heart with the joy of Christmas, expand your generosity, and find new traditions to help your family celebrate Jesus' birth.
2:31
SPEAKER_00: If you've ever struggled with frustration, anxiety, and self-doubt, especially during the holidays, you need to know you are not alone.
2:40
SPEAKER_00: I am here to help you navigate through the overwhelm with faith, Enneagram, and sustainable and practical rhythms for your everyday life.
2:48
SPEAKER_00: So listen along as you stream those holiday lights, walk off those tasty treats, or drive around trying to find that perfect gift.
3:16
SPEAKER_07: You're so welcome.
3:18
SPEAKER_00: You are going to represent Enneagram Nines today.
3:22
SPEAKER_00: How do you feel about it?
3:23
SPEAKER_07: Um I'm a little nervous.
3:24
SPEAKER_07: Am I gonna say the right thing, the wrong thing?
3:27
SPEAKER_07: I'm just kidding.
3:28
SPEAKER_07: You can't.
3:29
SPEAKER_00: You can't say the wrong thing.
3:32
SPEAKER_00: That's what's great.
3:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, me too.
3:35
SPEAKER_00: The first question is what is on your Christmas wish list this year?
3:41
SPEAKER_08: Every year I would say I don't have one.
3:44
SPEAKER_08: That's my answer.
3:45
SPEAKER_08: Uh-huh.
3:46
SPEAKER_08: Like, I'm not gonna like give you one.
3:48
SPEAKER_08: Like my in-laws are always like, give us a list of what you want.
3:50
SPEAKER_08: I'm like, that's silly, because I really don't need anything.
3:54
SPEAKER_08: And I don't want you to spend money on me.
3:57
SPEAKER_08: That's always my answer.
3:59
SPEAKER_08: Uh-huh.
3:59
SPEAKER_08: Um, so I feel like I never really need anything, but I do have a few things, mainly for my husband, like a joint gift, too.
4:06
SPEAKER_00: Oh, interesting.
4:07
SPEAKER_08: Just because, like COVID, obviously, we have been working out in our basement and kind of wanting some workout equipment because we don't go to the gym anymore.
4:16
SPEAKER_08: Also, I don't know if I really would go to the gym just give the time to be honest.
4:21
SPEAKER_08: My babies, to be honest.
4:23
SPEAKER_08: So we've been working out in our basement.
4:25
SPEAKER_08: So I would want a bosu ball and a rowing machine.
4:29
SPEAKER_08: It's like, I don't ever really want anything, but then hey, I want this large item.
4:34
SPEAKER_08: So yeah.
4:35
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
4:37
SPEAKER_00: That's so classic.
4:42
SPEAKER_00: Not necessarily the practical element.
4:44
SPEAKER_00: I mean that too, but you know, it's kind of pricey, and that's why you hesitate to ask.
4:49
SPEAKER_00: And you're not gonna just ask anyone because it's got a couple dollar signs in front of it, right?
4:55
SPEAKER_08: There's a lot of research that goes into it too.
4:57
SPEAKER_08: It's like, I'm not gonna just say, hey, I need this by this day.
5:00
SPEAKER_08: It's like, oh, it could be like maybe early next year because I want to like know what I'm getting.
5:05
SPEAKER_08: Yeah.
5:06
SPEAKER_08: And I'm not just gonna spend the top dollar.
5:09
SPEAKER_08: Like, I'm fine.
5:10
SPEAKER_08: I'm not like a hardcore, you know, I just need a little body quick workout, not like a super intense, you know, I don't need that.
5:18
SPEAKER_00: So yeah, that's lots of research that has to go into it.
5:23
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
5:23
SPEAKER_00: This is so great.
5:25
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so what is it about the Christmas buying process that stresses you out or you don't really care for?
5:34
SPEAKER_08: It stresses me out like if I don't have a good idea of what because I'm not just gonna get someone a gift just to like check the box, here's your gift.
5:42
SPEAKER_08: I think that's has to be super intentional and also has to be like, will they really use it?
5:48
SPEAKER_08: Especially like my dad's always really hard to buy for.
5:50
SPEAKER_08: And it's like, oh, we can get him something, but then like it'll sit on his counter for like a year and a half or whatever it may be.
5:57
SPEAKER_08: You want to be super intentional.
5:59
SPEAKER_08: So it's kind of getting maybe like that stuck a little bit.
6:02
SPEAKER_08: But then also maybe if you find a gift, but it maybe it's too pricey, you know.
6:07
SPEAKER_08: Maybe it's not you really want to get them that thing, but it's not realistic.
6:12
SPEAKER_08: You know, so then there's that.
6:14
SPEAKER_08: I blame my husband, he's super frugal, which is good, which is good.
6:19
SPEAKER_08: Yes, he's lightened up a whole lot.
6:21
SPEAKER_08: We've met in the middle, yeah.
6:23
SPEAKER_00: Yes, so maybe spender saver, you know, little verses there.
6:28
SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh.
6:29
SPEAKER_08: Just knowing, like, is it worth it?
6:30
SPEAKER_08: Is that something that would be utilized?
6:32
SPEAKER_08: And is it worth that buying that for that person or whatever, whoever it may be?
6:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I can see a lot of your practicality blending in here and the value that you do place on things, even though they are pricey, you have that sense of like it's gonna be worth it because they're really gonna appreciate it.
6:50
SPEAKER_08: Going back to like being practical, we're not too big on like things.
6:55
SPEAKER_08: It might be more of like, okay, for this experience, or like one year we did family pictures, you know, and we spent a little extra money just because, you know, that's a special thing, you know, that we'll have forever.
7:08
SPEAKER_08: Yes.
7:08
SPEAKER_08: Or, you know, things like that.
7:09
SPEAKER_08: I think that's the way we kind of look at, you know, gifts almost instead of like, oh, what's this thing that you can have?
7:16
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it has to have value.
7:18
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's good.
7:20
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
7:20
SPEAKER_00: So what about the gift buying process?
7:22
SPEAKER_00: Do you enjoy?
7:24
SPEAKER_08: I think I can almost say like being really intentional and like knowing, like, oh my goodness, they are just gonna love this when you find that super special thing.
7:35
SPEAKER_08: My big thing too would be like the thought, like and the time.
7:40
SPEAKER_08: Like, so we make a lot of homemade gifts.
7:42
SPEAKER_08: We love like making things thanks to my husband, he's super handy.
7:46
SPEAKER_08: So that's kind of like a big thing.
7:48
SPEAKER_08: It kind of goes with more frugal, more meaningful and thoughtful because we actually spent that time, you know, that time behind it, whatever it may be, to think about that person and to then you know, make whatever they you know for that person.
8:03
SPEAKER_08: So, yeah, we do a lot of homemade gifts.
8:05
SPEAKER_08: I love that.
8:06
SPEAKER_08: I didn't know that you guys uh tell my husband too.
8:10
SPEAKER_08: I'm like, don't give anything for my birthday or any gifts, really.
8:13
SPEAKER_08: I'm like, just sit down with the girls, talk about what you know you want to make or what they think.
8:18
SPEAKER_08: You know, it's always just the sweetest and kind of funny when they come up with ideas.
8:23
SPEAKER_08: I bet.
8:24
SPEAKER_08: I can only imagine what I love, you know.
8:27
SPEAKER_08: I don't need a thing, I want that sweet little memory.
8:31
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I love that.
8:33
SPEAKER_00: That's so great.
8:34
SPEAKER_00: I want to get a gift from you guys.
8:36
unknown: It's so fun.
8:39
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
8:39
SPEAKER_00: I did one year when I was 18, I think it was, I made everybody something, and that was the first for me.
8:46
SPEAKER_00: I was trying to be really frugal.
8:48
SPEAKER_00: College was the next year and everything, and but that is one of the most memorable Christmases ever, and that was 22 years ago.
8:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because I made it, and anyway, that always stuck out with me.
9:00
SPEAKER_00: I've not quite had the forte to do that again.
9:02
SPEAKER_08: I didn't, you know, marry a woodworker or I mean he's it's pretty resourceful, but he teaches you a lot.
9:09
SPEAKER_08: I mean, you don't need to be a woodworker.
9:11
SPEAKER_00: That's right, that's right.
9:13
SPEAKER_00: So I I love it.
9:14
SPEAKER_00: I think handmade is so thoughtful, and I love that that that's a value to you and it makes sense.
9:19
SPEAKER_00: I see that.
9:20
SPEAKER_00: So it's so fun.
9:22
SPEAKER_00: Okay, bonus question.
9:23
SPEAKER_00: I'm curious to know if you happen to know your love language.
9:27
SPEAKER_08: I do.
9:28
SPEAKER_08: So um Scott and I my husband, we read this book together, I think it was just last year, which was really fun just to do to read it and then talk about it.
9:35
SPEAKER_08: Um, my I would say my love language is quality time.
9:40
SPEAKER_08: Definitely quality time, and I think short, kind of behind would probably be acts of service.
9:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
9:46
SPEAKER_08: So yeah, I just value that time.
9:48
SPEAKER_08: Like again, kind of like don't give me any gifts.
9:51
SPEAKER_08: I just want to like, like for my birthday, usually I'm like, I don't want anything, I just want like a day of just family, of just togetherness, and that's just what I value most.
10:00
SPEAKER_08: So I love it.
10:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it definitely shows up.
10:03
SPEAKER_00: I've really enjoyed combining the two.
10:06
SPEAKER_00: I mean, I would have to do way more research to see if there's a connection between personalities and their love languages, but it definitely shines through in everyone that I've asked, you know, what the process looks like personality-wise, and then comparing it to the top love language.
10:24
SPEAKER_00: And they really do connect.
10:26
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
10:26
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's super fun.
10:28
SPEAKER_00: And I just thought it would be neat because those all play a valuable role in understanding how we receive and how we give.
10:37
SPEAKER_00: And ultimately, the idea that how we can make this Christmas and any Christmas more joyful and gift-giving process is to understand ourselves a little bit better and to not be afraid to own it.
10:51
SPEAKER_00: Like it's not wrong to acknowledge your love language, and it's not wrong to go, oh yeah, this is what I want.
10:56
SPEAKER_00: And you know, this is what stresses me out.
10:58
SPEAKER_00: So this is where I come along and I have my Enneagram gift giving guide to help people, you know, go like, oh yeah, it doesn't have to be stressful.
11:09
SPEAKER_08: And so recognize that it's so good.
11:12
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
11:13
SPEAKER_00: Well, thank you, Sarah.
11:15
SPEAKER_00: This has been awesome.
11:21
SPEAKER_00: Happy Christmas, Amy.
11:24
SPEAKER_00: I have to use that because you know what?
11:26
SPEAKER_00: Yes, that's your phrase.
11:29
SPEAKER_00: It is my phrase.
11:30
SPEAKER_00: Happy Christmas.
11:31
SPEAKER_00: It's one of those British things you probably really didn't lose because hello, your first 18 years of life.
11:39
SPEAKER_00: That was how you sent your salutations.
11:41
SPEAKER_00: Am I correct?
11:42
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
11:43
SPEAKER_00: Happy Christmas.
11:44
SPEAKER_00: And why do the Brits say happy Christmas as opposed to Mary?
11:48
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
11:49
SPEAKER_00: Maybe we're just a happier type of people.
11:52
SPEAKER_04: Have you watched the make-off?
11:54
SPEAKER_04: They're all happy.
11:54
SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
11:58
SPEAKER_00: It's so funny.
11:58
SPEAKER_00: I've always wondered that.
12:00
SPEAKER_00: I like it.
12:00
SPEAKER_00: I adopt it every once in a while, and it makes me feel smarter.
12:06
SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah, you are here as my Enneagram 8 guest to represent.
12:12
SPEAKER_00: How do you feel about that?
12:13
SPEAKER_00: It is a fun thing.
12:14
SPEAKER_04: I feel like I'm in the cool club being in your Enneagram club now.
12:18
SPEAKER_04: So awesome.
12:19
SPEAKER_04: I love being an eight.
12:20
SPEAKER_04: So I'm happy to share all my thoughts all the time.
12:23
SPEAKER_00: You do love being an eight.
12:25
SPEAKER_00: And I have to say, when we did my motherhood and Enneagram series, I had all my different friends who've come on my living room couch and gone through my Enneagram and Motherhood series.
12:34
SPEAKER_00: And you weren't able to go through that series, but you have been on my couch numerous times.
12:41
SPEAKER_00: I have.
12:42
SPEAKER_04: Many a times have I been on your couch and loved it.
12:45
SPEAKER_04: Your coffee, your fire, your awesome muffins that I can eat because they're whole 30 and so good.
12:51
SPEAKER_00: I need to make some of those.
12:53
SPEAKER_00: Well, I will save our very unique friend story for another day because it's super fun.
12:59
SPEAKER_00: It's one of those for the books because it's definitely a but God kind of thing.
13:04
SPEAKER_00: So I love it.
13:05
SPEAKER_00: But today we're talking about Christmas and how we're going to have a happier Christmas is to understand what are the people that we love, what kind of gifts they're looking for, and also just understand ourselves better in the whole Christmas gift buying process.
13:21
SPEAKER_00: So we're going to start off with what as an Enneagram type 8 and as a mom and a woman who does many things, has many responsibilities, what is on your Christmas wish list?
13:33
SPEAKER_04: So I'm pretty practical when it comes to Christmas.
13:35
SPEAKER_04: So my number one thing is that I want one of those robot vacuum things.
13:41
SPEAKER_04: We just got hardwood floors put in our house, and I love them.
13:45
SPEAKER_04: We get from I just feel like this just leave.
13:48
SPEAKER_04: You know, the kids are outside, the leaf crumbles right now.
13:51
SPEAKER_04: I just feel like they're everywhere.
13:52
SPEAKER_04: So I feel like I'm always sleeping the floor.
13:54
SPEAKER_04: It's so plus a puppy.
13:57
SPEAKER_04: Plus a puppy who's also in the leaves, yes, all the time.
14:00
SPEAKER_04: And it's so fun.
14:01
SPEAKER_04: Well, fall is so fun, but I would like extra hands around here.
14:06
SPEAKER_04: So robo vacuums.
14:08
SPEAKER_00: Robo vacuums.
14:09
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
14:09
SPEAKER_00: That's a great idea.
14:10
SPEAKER_00: So, Ian, take note.
14:12
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
14:12
SPEAKER_00: Your wife wants the robo vacuum.
14:16
SPEAKER_00: Okay, now on the flip side, what about the gift buying process is frustrating for you?
14:22
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
14:22
SPEAKER_04: My husband's family is pretty large.
14:25
SPEAKER_04: He's one of eight kids.
14:26
SPEAKER_04: And so instead of buying everyone a gift, we always do Secret Santa.
14:30
SPEAKER_04: It is really difficult for me because one, you get sent a list.
14:35
SPEAKER_04: So that is really hard.
14:37
SPEAKER_04: Lists would be my number one, and budgets would be the other one.
14:42
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
14:43
SPEAKER_04: So this year.
14:44
SPEAKER_04: So last year we had to do my sister-in-law was getting married, and so they decided that you have to have a thrifty kind of secret Santa Exchange.
14:52
SPEAKER_04: Like you couldn't spend hardly any money at all.
14:54
SPEAKER_04: And this year they put a money cap on it.
14:56
SPEAKER_04: So it's just really hard for me because it's lots of control and squishing and you know being told what to do, you know.
15:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh, that is so interesting.
15:08
SPEAKER_00: So it's like limitations combined with the control aspect, because you like to give a list, because I know Enneagram Eights do have a list in mind and they really prefer people to stick to the list.
15:19
SPEAKER_00: So on the flip side though, you find it frustrating when you're confined to a list and confined to a budget.
15:26
SPEAKER_04: Right.
15:26
SPEAKER_04: So with Ian, I usually like through the year drop all the things that I would like for Christmas throughout the year, but it still feels a little bit of a surprise because it's like a grand list.
15:36
SPEAKER_04: This is like, here's your email from this person, buy something from the list.
15:40
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, buy it yourself.
15:41
SPEAKER_04: Save the money.
15:42
SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
15:45
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
15:46
SPEAKER_00: No, this is really fun to hear because I do have a very strong eight-wing, and some of this feels familiar.
15:54
SPEAKER_00: And some of it feels a little bit like, well, I don't want that same expectation placed on me, but I kind of do it on the flip side.
16:00
SPEAKER_04: So I know it's real.
16:04
SPEAKER_04: It's real.
16:05
SPEAKER_04: It's real.
16:06
SPEAKER_04: I like saying it out loud.
16:07
SPEAKER_04: I'm like, this is a problem.
16:08
SPEAKER_04: I can see it.
16:09
SPEAKER_04: It just doesn't feel like a problem.
16:11
SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
16:12
SPEAKER_00: No, I love it.
16:13
SPEAKER_00: This is so great.
16:14
SPEAKER_00: I love getting to talk to you too, because I do have a daughter who leads us an Enneagram eight, and I often need some insight and wisdom.
16:21
SPEAKER_00: All right, Amy, tell me what to do here.
16:25
SPEAKER_04: Yes.
16:25
SPEAKER_04: I I I mean, there was you and then my sister-in-law, and you were big like in the Enneagram.
16:30
SPEAKER_04: And I was like, all right, I'll jump on the bandwagon.
16:32
SPEAKER_04: But my husband and I was like, oh, really?
16:35
SPEAKER_04: That's how you say I mean it's been that's for a different time, but it was such a game changer for us.
16:40
SPEAKER_04: We love it.
16:40
SPEAKER_04: It's so good.
16:41
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it is.
16:42
SPEAKER_00: It's so helpful.
16:43
SPEAKER_00: I love getting these insights and understanding.
16:45
SPEAKER_00: All right.
16:46
SPEAKER_00: So now switching gears with the what you do love about gift buying, especially if you don't have the limitations and restrictions placed on you.
16:56
SPEAKER_04: I think just having that like nugget, like you got it, like you know.
17:01
SPEAKER_04: Like maybe you've remembered from like September something someone said, or I don't know, I used a little list on my phone of just like the perfect.
17:09
SPEAKER_04: And it's just the thrill of like someone opening it and being like, Yep, I got it, like nailed it.
17:15
SPEAKER_04: It's just like that's awesome.
17:17
SPEAKER_04: I love it.
17:17
SPEAKER_00: That's good.
17:18
SPEAKER_00: I can kind of see, I think Enneagram eights in general don't care for surprises, but they actually really love providing the prizes or surprises in this sense because they have paid attention and they're fairly confident they'll give what somebody likes.
17:35
SPEAKER_00: Because I know, you know, you would be one to discover a new LaCroix flavor.
17:42
SPEAKER_00: And then you would be really excited to share it as a surprise for me, knowing that I'm pretty sure Amy's gonna like this.
17:49
SPEAKER_00: And yep, you've been right.
17:51
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yes, we have LaCroix friends for sure.
17:54
SPEAKER_00: Okay, last but not least, I think this has been a fun tie-in to kind of see the connection here.
17:59
SPEAKER_00: What is your love language?
18:01
SPEAKER_04: I don't know, maybe you know this.
18:02
SPEAKER_04: Can love languages change, do you think, or is it like an Instagram thing?
18:06
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
18:06
SPEAKER_04: I think they change for sure.
18:08
SPEAKER_04: Okay, I hate to be really stereotypical, but I feel like the more children I've had maybe might have changed.
18:13
SPEAKER_04: Yes.
18:13
SPEAKER_04: Um, you know, and just the different seasons of life now that I work full-time.
18:18
SPEAKER_04: So I would say right now, uh gifts of or acts of service are probably my number one thing because my time is so valuable to me that if anyone can take anything off my plate, then it's just such a blessing.
18:31
SPEAKER_04: By all means, please do.
18:32
SPEAKER_04: Yes, please help the mom.
18:35
SPEAKER_04: And then gifts.
18:36
SPEAKER_04: I just love gifts.
18:38
SPEAKER_04: I do.
18:39
SPEAKER_04: Ian so when we first got married, so my mom's the mom who buys like socks, toothbrushes, wraps it all up for Christmas, just like gum, you know, all the little things.
18:47
SPEAKER_04: So practical.
18:48
SPEAKER_04: Very practical, but lots of little things.
18:50
SPEAKER_04: I love opening gifts, I just think it's awesome.
18:53
SPEAKER_04: So when Ian I get married, he had not seen this like family exchange much because we live here in Kansas City in America, and my parents live in England.
19:02
SPEAKER_04: And so I had been saying, All I want for Christmas is clothes.
19:06
SPEAKER_04: I think it was clothes, something like that, like something that I would buy.
19:09
SPEAKER_04: So for Christmas, he gave me a check from our joint bank account.
19:15
SPEAKER_04: And I cried and I cried, and he kept saying, What's wrong?
19:20
SPEAKER_04: Isn't this more money than you would have thought that I would spend on you?
19:24
SPEAKER_04: I just cried because I just love opening gifts and having things.
19:31
SPEAKER_04: And so over the years, he has become a really good gift giver because he has to redeem the year that he gave me the check.
19:39
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
19:40
SPEAKER_00: I think we all, as married people, have a Christmas like that or a birthday like that where the spouse had to learn the hard way because family culture.
19:53
SPEAKER_00: Family culture, right?
19:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
19:55
SPEAKER_00: I mean, he was thought he gave me exactly what I wanted, but no, wasn't it?
20:00
SPEAKER_00: And as an Enneagram nine, we're both married to one of those.
20:03
SPEAKER_00: And so there's some similarities there of how they would go about it and why they would do what they did.
20:10
SPEAKER_04: Yes.
20:11
SPEAKER_04: So I think for Ian being a number nine Enneagram, that he would never buy me another check because peace has to reign in his house.
20:19
SPEAKER_04: And so he knows happy life, happy life.
20:22
SPEAKER_00: Ah, Amen.
20:23
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's awesome.
20:24
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
20:25
SPEAKER_00: Amy, fabulous represent for the Enneagram 8s.
20:28
SPEAKER_00: I've loved this, and I think my friends are really gonna appreciate getting to hear your perspective.
20:33
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
20:34
SPEAKER_00: Thanks for talking, Stephanie.
20:39
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for coming on the podcast.
20:42
SPEAKER_00: Yes, represent Enneagram Sevens.
20:44
SPEAKER_00: How do you feel about it?
20:46
SPEAKER_03: I feel great about it.
20:47
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
20:48
SPEAKER_03: Right?
20:48
SPEAKER_03: Is this the most thing?
20:50
SPEAKER_03: I feel like this is so fun.
20:52
SPEAKER_03: I love sevens.
20:53
SPEAKER_03: I'm all about a good party.
20:55
SPEAKER_03: I'm all about fun.
20:56
SPEAKER_03: So I'm excited to represent.
20:58
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you're gonna do a phenomenal job.
21:00
SPEAKER_00: I can't wait to hear.
21:02
SPEAKER_00: And it's so fun to have fellow sevens on and be like, yes, me too.
21:07
SPEAKER_00: It's so great.
21:09
SPEAKER_02: Yes, yes.
21:10
SPEAKER_00: Okay, well, first of all, what is on your Christmas wish list?
21:17
SPEAKER_03: Always a free people gift card.
21:19
SPEAKER_03: I love free people.
21:20
SPEAKER_03: That's store, my favorite.
21:22
SPEAKER_03: It's it's so good.
21:23
SPEAKER_03: I feel like if there's anything that represents me, it's that.
21:27
SPEAKER_03: I don't know why.
21:28
SPEAKER_03: Just because it's free and it's fun.
21:31
SPEAKER_03: You can just kind of wear it how you want.
21:34
SPEAKER_03: And so that's kind of no limitations, right?
21:39
SPEAKER_03: Yes, yes.
21:40
SPEAKER_03: You can just be free and be yourself.
21:42
SPEAKER_03: And I'm all about that.
21:44
SPEAKER_00: So you need to become a brand ambassador.
21:46
SPEAKER_00: I'm ready, ready to go, shopping.
21:48
SPEAKER_00: I mean, yes.
21:50
SPEAKER_03: I'm kind of simple.
21:52
SPEAKER_03: I'm kind of like whatever.
21:54
SPEAKER_03: But yeah, free people gift card, that's on my Christmas list.
21:57
SPEAKER_03: And I got the dog I wanted.
21:59
SPEAKER_03: So I'm I'm pretty happy.
22:02
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
22:04
SPEAKER_01: Which is kind of out of the norm for me.
22:07
SPEAKER_01: I feel like I constantly want things, but yeah.
22:09
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
22:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
22:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
22:11
SPEAKER_00: I mean, that is a seven thing where we have sort of an insatiable appetite, not necessarily for knowledge like a five, but for things and experiences and food.
22:21
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
22:22
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
22:22
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
22:23
SPEAKER_02: Give me all the food and all the things.
22:26
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
22:26
SPEAKER_02: That's me in a nutshell.
22:28
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
22:29
SPEAKER_00: But I think, and I'm kind of curious to know if you feel the same way.
22:32
SPEAKER_00: And I'm definitely a seven wing eight.
22:34
SPEAKER_00: I've been working a lot of my life on the wing six because I want to be balanced.
22:39
SPEAKER_00: But it's almost hard to make the wish list because there's kind of a lot of things, if I'm truly honest, like, oh, I like her earrings.
22:49
SPEAKER_00: I'd like that.
22:49
SPEAKER_00: And oh, I could use some shoes and clothes.
22:52
SPEAKER_00: And oh, but take me to a fun restaurant and let's do like paint by wine and you know, just like all those things.
23:04
SPEAKER_00: And so absolutely.
23:06
SPEAKER_00: It's a little bit.
23:08
SPEAKER_03: I totally can relate to that.
23:10
SPEAKER_03: You know, I did say to my husband, I want the smile necklace from Tiffany's.
23:15
SPEAKER_03: And so he's like, okay, other than that, what else do you want?
23:18
SPEAKER_03: He is like not a good gift giver.
23:21
SPEAKER_03: We were talking about that this morning.
23:22
SPEAKER_03: He was like, When was the last time I bought you a Christmas present?
23:24
SPEAKER_03: Because he'll be like, just take the money and get what you want.
23:27
SPEAKER_03: Because I'm kind of hard to buy for.
23:29
SPEAKER_03: It's like you like this and you like this.
23:32
SPEAKER_03: So yeah, uh-huh.
23:33
SPEAKER_03: That's probably that's a lot of that seven coming through.
23:35
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
23:36
SPEAKER_00: I I can't think of probably hardly any Christmas that I was disappointed because I'm usually just pretty happy to get whatever.
23:42
SPEAKER_00: And so I think my husband's finally kind of just decided that once he finds something he thinks I need or want, he just go ahead and goes with it and just figures I'll be happy with it.
23:52
SPEAKER_00: Because a lot of times I get things I didn't ask for or that I knew I wanted.
23:56
SPEAKER_00: But in the end, I'm like, oh, actually, I wanted that.
24:00
SPEAKER_00: I didn't know I needed that.
24:02
SPEAKER_00: You know, so yeah, it is kind of hard to buy for people like us who are kind of all over the place and we like so yeah, and I find Christmas shopping hard because you know, when you're supposed to go buy for everyone else, I see all the things for myself.
24:19
SPEAKER_03: And so then I'm like telling my husband, don't get me anything, just don't even worry about me because I got it already.
24:26
SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
24:27
SPEAKER_00: That's I may or may not be wearing something when I was buying.
24:32
SPEAKER_00: I mean, look at these, they're so cute.
24:34
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I was buying stuff for some, you know, a few other people.
24:37
SPEAKER_00: And then I'm like, oh, but look at these cute little red truck with a Christmas tree.
24:41
SPEAKER_03: Yes, that's what I was like, is that a red truck?
24:43
SPEAKER_03: It's so cute.
24:44
SPEAKER_00: It is, it's so cute, right?
24:45
SPEAKER_00: And my husband has to drive a red truck for work, and I'm like, I just need to keep these.
24:50
SPEAKER_02: Totally.
24:51
SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
24:52
SPEAKER_02: So cute.
24:54
SPEAKER_00: Well, you may have already hinted at it, but I'm curious to know what is it about Christmas shopping or buying that you don't really enjoy?
25:02
SPEAKER_03: I get overwhelmed because sometimes I've gotten such good gifts that I'm like, how can I do the same thing for someone else?
25:12
SPEAKER_03: So true.
25:13
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
25:14
SPEAKER_03: I think that that like really perplexes me.
25:17
SPEAKER_03: And I have a friend that was like, she said, Stephanie, I always love the gifts you give, but I'm like, I struggle.
25:23
SPEAKER_03: It's like I want to give amazing gifts, but I just feel like, well, what if they don't like that?
25:30
SPEAKER_03: Or really I like that, and they may not, you know what I'm saying?
25:34
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
25:35
SPEAKER_03: So I feel like, like I said, too, shopping for other people.
25:38
SPEAKER_03: I see all the things that I want and I will buy it for myself.
25:41
SPEAKER_03: So there's that.
25:44
SPEAKER_03: It's just like an endless cycle of ooh, me, me, me, me.
25:48
SPEAKER_03: And you know.
25:50
SPEAKER_03: So I think like getting out of that, thinking about myself and thinking about other people rut can be a little bit challenging.
25:58
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
25:59
SPEAKER_00: It's interesting you say it that way because I don't think I've thought through that, but you're totally right.
26:04
SPEAKER_00: Because say an Enneagram 4, I have some Enneagram fours in my life.
26:07
SPEAKER_00: They are awesome gift givers because they notice things, they're into the details and they're good at seeing because that's how they also receive love.
26:16
SPEAKER_00: And so I lack that quality sometimes of that attention to details.
26:20
SPEAKER_00: I'm always big picture and you know, about experiences and often on to the next thing that I it takes intention to be thoughtful and think back.
26:30
SPEAKER_00: Okay, what have they talked about?
26:31
SPEAKER_00: What have I noticed about them in my experiences with them or conversation or whatever that I could find something meaningful because and that's it's kind of tiring.
26:43
unknown: I know.
26:44
SPEAKER_03: I know.
26:45
SPEAKER_03: I feel like I don't always think things through, and I just am like, I don't even know.
26:49
SPEAKER_03: And so then I just will be like, okay, gift cards, like and I wait a lot of the time to the last minute.
26:57
SPEAKER_03: So struggle is real, it is very real.
27:02
SPEAKER_00: It is, and it's a problem because I have my husband and my daughter's birthday, it's the 22nd and 23rd of December.
27:10
SPEAKER_00: And then my birthday is two days after Christmas.
27:12
SPEAKER_00: And so we have so much that I have to get all at once.
27:16
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, I should start in October, but I don't.
27:21
SPEAKER_03: I will say I did buy a Christmas present for my husband last night.
27:24
SPEAKER_03: And I that's the I think this is the earliest thing.
27:28
SPEAKER_03: But what is also hard for us is I always am like, okay, I can't wait till Christmas.
27:33
SPEAKER_03: Do you want to see what you got?
27:34
SPEAKER_03: You know, like so pretty much we end up opening our gifts all before Christmas, and then on Christmas Day, we just kind of like sit and enjoy, you know, yes time together.
27:46
SPEAKER_00: Music and food and lights and the toys.
27:48
SPEAKER_03: You already gave me toys.
27:50
SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
27:50
SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
27:52
SPEAKER_03: It's it's rough.
27:53
SPEAKER_00: That's so good.
27:54
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
27:55
SPEAKER_00: So the fun part of it, what is it that you love about gift giving and the hunts or the shopping and the finding for other people?
28:04
SPEAKER_03: Oh gosh.
28:06
SPEAKER_03: I feel like it's always people's reactions, you know, when they love what you gave them.
28:12
SPEAKER_03: One of my friends, I love giving her things because she's just like, Steph, like I always love what you give me.
28:19
SPEAKER_03: And so even though I may think, gosh, I bought that just because I liked it.
28:24
SPEAKER_03: Like sometimes that really blesses your friends.
28:27
SPEAKER_03: Like they're like, Well, I love your style or I love this.
28:30
SPEAKER_03: I'm so glad you gave that to me because I never would have picked this for myself.
28:35
SPEAKER_03: For me, it's that, it's their reactions and them thinking, like, man, this is something outside of the box for me, but I absolutely love it.
28:43
SPEAKER_03: That's so fun for me.
28:45
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's good.
28:46
SPEAKER_00: Spot on, I would say I'm in agreement too.
28:49
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
28:50
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so bonus question to wrap up.
28:53
SPEAKER_00: Do you happen to know your love language?
28:56
SPEAKER_03: I feel like it would be gifts, right?
28:59
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's like, yeah, I think it's gifts.
29:03
SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
29:03
SPEAKER_03: No, that's no fat at all.
29:05
SPEAKER_03: Since I'm a seven and I'm about those things, I love a good gift.
29:10
SPEAKER_00: So yeah.
29:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm with you.
29:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm with you.
29:12
SPEAKER_00: You didn't have to pay for it and you got another thing.
29:15
SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
29:17
SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
29:18
SPEAKER_03: Maybe words of affirmation too, but definitely gifts.
29:22
SPEAKER_00: Gifts is up there.
29:23
SPEAKER_00: So gifts with a really great card, handwritten card.
29:27
SPEAKER_00: Oh, absolutely.
29:28
SPEAKER_00: And oh yeah.
29:29
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
29:31
SPEAKER_00: That's it.
29:33
SPEAKER_03: So good.
29:33
SPEAKER_03: Gifts with a good card.
29:35
SPEAKER_03: Love it.
29:36
SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes.
29:37
SPEAKER_00: Oh, Stephanie, I have loved this conversation.
29:40
SPEAKER_00: You've done an amazing job representing.
29:42
SPEAKER_00: I'm excited to share it with everybody.
29:45
SPEAKER_00: I think everyone's gonna just laugh along with us and learn a little bit either about themselves or about their Enneagram seven friends, which that's what we're in the business of doing, right?
29:54
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
29:55
SPEAKER_03: I feel like there's so much more that I need to learn about Enneagram.
29:59
SPEAKER_03: So so glad that you're out here doing this to help us know about ourselves.
30:03
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
30:04
SPEAKER_00: Anytime.
30:08
SPEAKER_00: Remy, you lead as a six.
30:10
SPEAKER_00: At one point in time, you did think you led as a seven.
30:13
SPEAKER_00: So would you say you have a strong seven wing?
30:17
SPEAKER_00: Yes, I do.
30:18
SPEAKER_00: I have a feeling some of your answers will kind of see that woven in there a little bit.
30:24
unknown: I hope they do.
30:26
SPEAKER_00: I think they will.
30:28
SPEAKER_00: So tell me first of all, what is on your Christmas wish list this year?
30:33
SPEAKER_06: Oh, I thought this was so hilarious that you asked this because I got on, I was like, what's on it?
30:38
SPEAKER_06: And I got on my Christmas wish list.
30:40
SPEAKER_06: There is a car emergency kit.
30:43
SPEAKER_06: Oh my word.
30:44
SPEAKER_06: A portable power station, and then a wearable blanket.
30:50
SPEAKER_06: Oh my gosh, this is too good.
30:53
SPEAKER_06: I know, I know.
30:54
SPEAKER_06: I was like, oh, this is too good.
30:56
SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah.
30:58
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, well, hey, you know, at least you nailed it.
31:01
unknown: Yep, exactly.
31:03
SPEAKER_06: Check.
31:05
SPEAKER_06: I did I was just gonna say, I think before I found out it was Enneagram 6, I probably wouldn't have put that on there because I'd be ashamed.
31:14
SPEAKER_00: And now I'm like, well, yeah, this is who I am.
31:16
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna put it on there.
31:17
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
31:18
SPEAKER_00: Embracing all of it, even some of the stigma.
31:21
SPEAKER_00: It's all good.
31:22
SPEAKER_00: It's really good.
31:24
SPEAKER_00: I did at Costco last night see a new version of a wearable blanket.
31:28
SPEAKER_00: And I was slightly intrigued, I have to say.
31:30
SPEAKER_00: It looked kind of cozy.
31:32
SPEAKER_00: I wasn't sure about the lining, so I'm like, no, I won't put that one on the list, but I like the idea.
31:37
SPEAKER_06: Yes.
31:37
SPEAKER_00: I think I would wear it all day.
31:39
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
31:40
SPEAKER_00: So all cozy and warm and secure.
31:42
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
31:43
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's so great.
31:45
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so what is it about the Christmas buying process that you don't enjoy?
31:52
SPEAKER_06: I really want it to be perfect for them.
31:54
SPEAKER_06: And so I stress out too much thinking about where they like this.
31:59
SPEAKER_06: This is something they need, this is something they want, and so I will sit and stress out about that.
32:05
SPEAKER_06: And I think I second guess myself a lot on some gifts.
32:09
SPEAKER_06: Yes, yes so that I get the right one, but also I just want it done.
32:16
unknown: Check.
32:17
SPEAKER_06: Yes, I've already finished shopping for my husband and for Beth and Auntie.
32:23
SPEAKER_06: Like I'm just done.
32:24
SPEAKER_06: And you're amazing.
32:26
SPEAKER_06: Have like one more gift to buy.
32:28
SPEAKER_00: Can I have whatever you're doing?
32:29
SPEAKER_00: Um taking whatever it is, because I haven't even begun.
32:34
SPEAKER_00: Well, I don't have kids to buy stuff for and stuff.
32:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but still, that's phenomenal.
32:40
SPEAKER_06: That's phenomenal.
32:41
SPEAKER_06: I mean getting it done.
32:43
SPEAKER_06: But then I can't find them.
32:44
SPEAKER_06: I had a search around the house trying to find all his gifts yesterday.
32:49
SPEAKER_06: Oh like Christmas vacation all over.
32:53
SPEAKER_06: Like sign it up in the attic later.
32:56
SPEAKER_06: Oh, that's where I put it.
32:58
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, exactly.
32:59
SPEAKER_08: Exactly.
33:00
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that is so great.
33:02
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
33:02
SPEAKER_00: Well, I happen to know that you're an amazing gift giver.
33:05
SPEAKER_00: So I think that even there's some fear there, I would like to affirm that you do a wonderful job.
33:12
SPEAKER_00: So thank you.
33:13
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
33:14
SPEAKER_00: Great.
33:14
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
33:15
SPEAKER_00: Well, then on the flip side, that's what you don't care for.
33:18
SPEAKER_00: And I'm here to say you are a great gift giver.
33:21
SPEAKER_00: So, what is it about the gift giving process that you do love?
33:26
SPEAKER_06: I love seeing it put a smile on people's face.
33:30
SPEAKER_06: And I feel like it's like everything that brings me angst about it.
33:34
SPEAKER_06: I love when I get to see that it's all good and that they put a smile on their face and that they love it so much.
33:42
SPEAKER_00: And it was worth it.
33:43
SPEAKER_00: All that hard work and that nervousness going into it.
33:47
SPEAKER_06: I love the like act of actually giving it to them.
33:50
SPEAKER_06: Sometimes I give gifts early.
33:52
SPEAKER_06: I gave Anna Lise a gift early.
33:54
SPEAKER_06: Did she?
33:55
SPEAKER_06: Yes, I gave her a Bean Crosby record because I'm like, I want her to have it now, and I want her to enjoy it now.
34:02
SPEAKER_06: So it's hard.
34:03
SPEAKER_06: And now I get to enjoy it.
34:05
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, exactly.
34:07
SPEAKER_06: So it's hard to keep them.
34:10
SPEAKER_06: Like I just want everybody to have it.
34:11
SPEAKER_06: Yep.
34:12
SPEAKER_06: And then I'm sad if I give it early.
34:16
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, now the fun's over.
34:18
SPEAKER_00: This is where I think the seven wing comes in because I have seen you do this repeatedly where you get so excited, like you can't keep the secret anymore.
34:27
SPEAKER_00: I just gotta give it.
34:28
SPEAKER_00: And then it's like, oh, what do I have to look forward to?
34:32
SPEAKER_06: Exactly.
34:33
SPEAKER_06: Exactly.
34:34
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
34:35
SPEAKER_00: That's so great.
34:36
SPEAKER_00: There is the seven wing.
34:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
34:39
SPEAKER_00: We knew.
34:39
SPEAKER_00: We knew it was gonna happen.
34:41
SPEAKER_00: Okay, well, last but not least, bonus question is do you happen to know your love language?
34:47
SPEAKER_06: Well, okay, I was trying to think.
34:49
SPEAKER_06: I know number one is gifts.
34:51
SPEAKER_06: Okay, yeah, I mean given.
34:54
SPEAKER_06: And then I couldn't remember if it was gifts, and I think it was quality time.
35:00
SPEAKER_06: Yes, I can see that.
35:02
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
35:04
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because uh I know that when things get quiet around there and Tilly's not enough entertainment, you call upon Elise.
35:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I need people.
35:14
SPEAKER_00: Trust me, Tilly's giving me a lot of entertainment.
35:17
SPEAKER_00: I bet, I bet, and now a lot taking up a lot more room.
35:22
SPEAKER_00: That is for sure.
35:24
SPEAKER_06: But I just love giving gifts and I like getting them.
35:27
SPEAKER_06: I think I like giving them more.
35:29
SPEAKER_06: I feel guilty when people give me gifts sometimes.
35:32
SPEAKER_09: Mmm, interesting.
35:33
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, but I love giving gifts.
35:36
SPEAKER_06: Why do you think you feel guilty?
35:38
SPEAKER_06: I think there could be an underlining of stuff of like maybe they can't afford that and why are they giving that to me?
35:45
SPEAKER_06: Or you see the sacrifice involved.
35:48
SPEAKER_06: Yes, yes, exactly.
35:50
SPEAKER_06: I think that's sometimes the biggest thing, or sometimes I feel like I don't deserve it.
35:53
SPEAKER_06: I'm like, I don't deserve this gift.
35:56
SPEAKER_06: And I don't like people to give me words of affirmation or affirmation.
36:01
SPEAKER_06: That sounds awful.
36:03
SPEAKER_06: No, I don't like to be like it pointed out that like, oh, I love center of attention.
36:09
SPEAKER_06: Yes.
36:10
SPEAKER_00: The whole turning red, feeling uncomfortable.
36:14
SPEAKER_00: It's real.
36:14
SPEAKER_00: Yep, it's real, definitely.
36:17
SPEAKER_00: Uh well, you did a great job.
36:19
SPEAKER_00: I mean, you've done this conversation, you've answered the questions, you've represented really well.
36:25
SPEAKER_00: Good.
36:25
SPEAKER_00: Now all you have to do is one more gift getting, and you can like just relax the rest of the holiday.
36:32
SPEAKER_00: I mean, come on.
36:33
SPEAKER_00: I'm so I've been trying.
36:35
SPEAKER_06: I think it's interesting about you making it more fun and less stressful because that's what I want Christmases to be.
36:40
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
36:41
SPEAKER_06: It's like it's not about getting your house the perfect way or you know.
36:46
SPEAKER_06: I mean, our neighbors are all decked out and we have a little star on our porch.
36:51
SPEAKER_00: It works.
36:52
SPEAKER_00: You represented.
36:53
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
36:53
SPEAKER_06: I'm like, that's probably all we'll do.
36:55
SPEAKER_06: We'll see.
36:55
SPEAKER_06: I don't know.
36:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, exactly.
36:58
SPEAKER_00: That would be a lot of stress.
36:59
SPEAKER_00: It's just so easy to get caught up and we don't know, but we get, you know, we see somebody on the gram or whatever, and they're doing this, and our friend is doing that, and we go, Oh, oh, we should do this.
37:12
SPEAKER_00: I think it's sneakier than everyday competition or keeping up with the Joneses because it's Christmas and I'm supposed to do these traditions and I'm supposed to have these things and we're supposed to make these memories.
37:25
SPEAKER_00: It's supposed to be super meaningful and it's supposed to be fun.
37:29
SPEAKER_00: But in the process of chasing after that, we've, you know, kind of instead created, I don't know, created monsters, you know, just in having to keep up with um everything.
37:40
SPEAKER_06: But yeah, and when I think about my Christmases, I don't think about, I mean, we had fun traditions, but I think about the moments that I had with my grandparents and my parents and all the sweet little like things that they didn't create really.
37:52
SPEAKER_06: It was just like it happened.
37:53
SPEAKER_06: It was their presence.
37:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
37:56
SPEAKER_00: Their physical presence, and that's what matters the most in the end.
37:59
SPEAKER_00: And if we're, you know, if we're just trying to do all the things.
38:03
SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
38:04
SPEAKER_00: Just can't do it.
38:08
SPEAKER_00: Elizabeth.
38:10
SPEAKER_05: Ah, it's Christmas time.
38:12
SPEAKER_05: Are you so excited?
38:13
SPEAKER_05: This is my favorite time of the year.
38:15
SPEAKER_05: I'm sure everybody says that, but to me, it's like a marathon starting, uh, I was gonna say November.
38:21
SPEAKER_05: This year it was for sure late October.
38:23
SPEAKER_05: I know that's embarrassing and not everybody's gonna agree with that, but for me, Christmas is a marathon and I prep for at least a quarter of the year.
38:29
SPEAKER_00: I think that's amazing, which we all want to know.
38:32
SPEAKER_00: What type do you lead with?
38:35
SPEAKER_00: Oh, Enneagram Five, the female five.
38:39
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
38:39
SPEAKER_00: I think a lot of people come and tell me, I don't know many Enneagram fives.
38:44
SPEAKER_00: Can you help me out?
38:45
SPEAKER_00: And Elizabeth, you're one of my new favorite Enneagram fives, and I'm so excited to have you here to represent.
38:52
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
38:52
SPEAKER_05: If you know of any other female fives, send them my way.
38:55
SPEAKER_05: I could use some more five friends in my life, I'm sure.
38:57
SPEAKER_05: I don't know.
38:57
SPEAKER_05: We would probably not ever meet up because we would just think about it, but it's worth a good experimental trial here.
39:04
SPEAKER_00: You could you could keep it, you could keep it to text or Zoom, something really, you know, exchange book lists, resources, things like that.
39:13
SPEAKER_00: I like that.
39:14
SPEAKER_05: You know, you're right up my alley.
39:16
SPEAKER_05: I like that solution.
39:17
SPEAKER_00: I'm just here to help.
39:18
SPEAKER_00: And I do know a couple of other Enneagram fives.
39:20
SPEAKER_00: I'll send them your way.
39:21
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
39:23
SPEAKER_00: All right, we all want to know what is on your Christmas list this year.
39:28
SPEAKER_00: Give us a little insight.
39:30
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
39:31
SPEAKER_05: Okay, this is like one of the hardest questions, as silly as that sounds, because I don't like to talk about things that I want or need.
39:37
SPEAKER_05: And so even as like I start to think about Christmas, I'm like, I don't actually like to talk about like not in like a like I don't like to think about it, I guess, because I try to be independent and I don't need anything or I don't want anything, but we're throwing that out the window this year because we are human beings and we need things and we want things, whether that's relationally or material things, we do need them.
39:57
SPEAKER_05: Something that I would love for this Christmas, something that would be on my list, is I kind of want more functional and experiential type of things.
40:04
SPEAKER_05: Oh, okay.
40:08
SPEAKER_05: I think I got mine on Black Friday, like probably a decade ago.
40:13
unknown: Yeah.
40:14
SPEAKER_05: My sister goes to it in like the freezer aisle of Walmart, and she got that for me about a decade ago.
40:20
SPEAKER_05: So I think a new TV would be an amazing thing.
40:23
SPEAKER_05: And honestly, I would love whether it's experiential of like reorganizing my home or like studio, something like that.
40:32
SPEAKER_05: So those would be like probably the two biggest things on my Christmas list this year would be something I actually really need, which would be like a decade-old upgrade from my old television.
40:41
SPEAKER_05: And maybe something experiential like reorganizing my house or my business or my studio.
40:46
SPEAKER_05: So something that makes it a little bit more home-y to be around.
40:50
SPEAKER_00: Okay, yeah, I hear the cry for environment to be a little bit cozier, welcoming, warmer.
40:58
SPEAKER_00: That's really important for a type five.
41:00
SPEAKER_05: I have never invested time, money, resources, or thought into that.
41:04
SPEAKER_05: Because to me it was like if you have a space, you can work in the space.
41:09
SPEAKER_05: Like the creativity aspect of it and the visual part of it didn't really mean a whole lot to me until probably the last couple of years.
41:16
SPEAKER_05: I don't know if all fives are like this, but like once you get your brain on something, like you do it all the way.
41:21
SPEAKER_05: And so for like the first most of my life, I didn't really care about design or decor or things like that.
41:28
SPEAKER_05: But now that I do, I like really do.
41:31
SPEAKER_05: So, yes, making things a little bit cozier around the home is a new feeling and desire for me.
41:37
SPEAKER_05: And I'm like going all in on it.
41:40
SPEAKER_00: I think it's great.
41:41
SPEAKER_00: I am curious to know though, as far as the TV, have you done some research to know exactly what it is that you want and need and what's the best one to get?
41:52
SPEAKER_05: I have only gotten to the point where I have thought about doing research.
41:56
SPEAKER_05: Okay, this is on prep.
41:58
SPEAKER_05: I love it.
41:59
SPEAKER_05: Yes, I even have to prep to do my prep.
42:02
SPEAKER_05: So um sounds like a classic type five thing to do.
42:07
SPEAKER_05: Here I am, I am present, and I'm here.
42:10
SPEAKER_05: I don't have any answers for you quite yet.
42:12
SPEAKER_05: And mostly I do think it's because I can compartmentalize so well, and that's a good thing in business, and it can be a not so good thing sometimes because you can push things off for too long.
42:23
SPEAKER_05: So thinking about things that I want or need makes me feel like like kind of funny on the inside.
42:28
SPEAKER_05: So doing the research will bring up those emotions.
42:31
SPEAKER_05: I know that sounds probably crazy to so many people that are not fives, but yeah, I could see I'm following you.
42:37
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
42:38
SPEAKER_05: I could see pushing off the research just because I don't want to address those feelings.
42:45
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
42:45
SPEAKER_00: Well, here's the deal.
42:46
SPEAKER_00: As long as the fiance has it in time to be able to hit up whatever sale is available this year, you'll be okay.
42:54
SPEAKER_05: And that is exactly right.
42:55
SPEAKER_05: He is a much more prepped and planned for those types of things than I ever am.
43:01
SPEAKER_00: He's got your back then.
43:02
SPEAKER_00: Yes, absolutely.
43:04
SPEAKER_00: All right, on the flip side, what is it that you don't enjoy about the gift buying process?
43:10
SPEAKER_05: For the first thing that comes up, and this is gonna sound very self-centered, I will say, but one of the things that is a big part of scarcity in my mind is just money.
43:19
SPEAKER_05: So that's probably the hardest part is just separating from the money aspect of it.
43:26
SPEAKER_05: But outside of that, I always wonder if what I am giving is appropriate to what I will be receiving.
43:33
SPEAKER_05: Ooh.
43:34
SPEAKER_05: Too grandiose.
43:36
SPEAKER_05: Is it not enough?
43:37
SPEAKER_05: How am I supposed to know?
43:39
SPEAKER_05: But you don't know until you actually exchange gifts.
43:43
SPEAKER_05: So that provides a lot of room in my brain of is this on the right scale and appropriate for this specific relationship and situation?
43:53
SPEAKER_00: This is super insightful because you're identifying the anxiety piece that isn't always easy to name.
44:00
SPEAKER_00: For a five because anxiety, what anxiety?
44:03
SPEAKER_00: But even when it comes to Christmas, exactly.
44:07
SPEAKER_05: My sister is the world's best gift giver and receiver.
44:12
SPEAKER_05: Like, I've never met anybody that is as amazing and gracious and excited and loving when she receives a gift.
44:19
SPEAKER_05: My mom had to tell me when I was in elementary school before every birthday party, Elizabeth, you have to act like you like your gifts.
44:26
SPEAKER_05: Like I know that you're going to love them, but you actually have to express excitement and gratitude.
44:32
SPEAKER_05: I don't know what it was, Amy, but I think my mom was also an etiquette teacher growing up.
44:37
SPEAKER_05: And so my grandparents got me a Barbie dream car when I was young, six or seven, like the dream Christmas gift.
44:46
SPEAKER_05: And I would not get in it in front of them.
44:49
SPEAKER_05: Once they left or left the room, I played in that Barbie dream car for years.
44:55
SPEAKER_05: But whenever they were around, nope, I wouldn't have anything to do with it.
44:59
SPEAKER_05: So I don't know what it is in me, but I will say that gift giving and receiving is like a very um emotional thing for me.
45:07
SPEAKER_05: And it's weird to say out loud, but it definitely evokes a lot of emotion.
45:11
SPEAKER_00: Well, this is making perfect sense.
45:13
SPEAKER_00: I grew up with an Enneagram 5, and this sort of situation feels familiar.
45:18
SPEAKER_00: So you're not the only one.
45:20
SPEAKER_00: And oh man, this is gold because how many of us do know an Enneagram 5?
45:26
SPEAKER_00: That's probably all of us.
45:27
SPEAKER_00: And now we can really understand what's going on inside there.
45:30
SPEAKER_00: So this is beautiful.
45:32
SPEAKER_00: I appreciate you being willing to share.
45:35
SPEAKER_00: Well, let's wrap this up with what do you love about the gift buying process?
45:41
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
45:41
SPEAKER_05: So my favorite part about the gift buying process is definitely finding the most unique experience or gift for the person.
45:50
SPEAKER_05: And so that might be where my forewing comes in a bad.
45:54
SPEAKER_05: Makes sense.
45:55
SPEAKER_05: I have to bring it back to a lot of times, does the person actually want this?
46:00
SPEAKER_05: Because I love finding something that's so different and so unique, but it's like at the end of the day, it's still about the person receiving versus the feeling of me giving it.
46:08
SPEAKER_05: But when I can find something that is so different and so unique, and I like nail it, that's definitely my favorite part about the gift giving process is like just providing them something that one, they they've never even thought of or two, they would never get for themselves.
46:23
SPEAKER_05: So the more unique and different than I can get, the better.
46:27
SPEAKER_00: This is great.
46:28
SPEAKER_00: You can give me a gift anytime.
46:32
SPEAKER_05: Appreciate that.
46:32
SPEAKER_05: You know, I will absolutely do that.
46:34
SPEAKER_05: I might think about it for a very long time before I do that, but we'll for sure get there with my fiveness.
46:41
SPEAKER_00: This is great.
46:42
SPEAKER_00: Okay, for bonus question today, as we finish.
46:46
SPEAKER_00: Do you happen to know your love language?
46:48
SPEAKER_05: Yes.
46:49
SPEAKER_05: This also comes with a caveat because I'm a five.
46:52
SPEAKER_05: I would say that my love language is quality time, but like in limited amounts.
46:59
SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh.
47:00
SPEAKER_00: Strategically timed.
47:02
SPEAKER_05: Strategically timed, quality time.
47:04
SPEAKER_05: Yes.
47:04
SPEAKER_05: When I'm with somebody, I want to be fully there and I want to have the time set aside to really invest in that relationship and have those deep conversations and be really present, but then also have an end time to the quality time.
47:16
SPEAKER_05: So definitely quality time, but not too much.
47:22
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh, this is so great.
47:24
SPEAKER_00: I love it, Elizabeth.
47:25
SPEAKER_00: If you were ever doubting that you were a five, let me just tell you, this is makes a whole lot of sense.
47:32
SPEAKER_05: This is some concrete confirmation of that.
47:34
SPEAKER_05: Yes, it is.
47:35
SPEAKER_05: Yes, it is.
47:36
SPEAKER_05: Awesome.
47:37
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, send those five friends my way so they can understand some of the quirkiness sides or the quirky sides of a five.
47:44
SPEAKER_05: You betcha.
47:45
SPEAKER_05: No problem.
47:49
SPEAKER_00: Well, I hope you've had as much fun as we did in recording these conversations.
47:54
SPEAKER_00: I truly found that each one provided even more insight to each and every type.
47:59
SPEAKER_00: I would love to know what you learn about these types that are on your gift buying list, and maybe a little bit of insight to yourself.
48:06
SPEAKER_00: Check out my gift giving series on Instagram and share it with your friends and family.
48:11
SPEAKER_00: Also, would you take a quick minute to rate and review this podcast?
48:15
SPEAKER_00: Every single review means so much to me, and it truly helps get this podcast out so others can be encouraged in their wholehearted journey.
48:24
SPEAKER_00: Join me on Wednesday for part two of these conversations and continue to pursue perspective, purpose, and plans for your wholehearted Advent season.