Latest / Love Matters With Leeza Mangaldas / Love and the Law: Marriage Equality, LGBTQ Rights & More ft. Saurabh Kirpal
Transcript
- 0:00I'm Lisa Mandelas and this is Love Matters, a podcast about relationship topics that
- 0:05matter to you and me, And today we're talking about how the law can
- 0:09influence how we love. While laws are intended to protect our rights, sometimes
- 0:16they may infringe upon our rights. And that is particularly true when you look
- 0:20at the history of the autonomy and agency and dignity of women and queer people.
- 0:25And who better to discuss this way than sorb Kirpau, Senior Advocate all
- 0:30of the book Sex and the Supreme Court, and someone whose work has been
- 0:34instrumental to granting more rights to queer people. Particularly his work was instrumental in
- 0:40the reading Dwance section three seven seven. He's also at the forefront of the
- 0:44conversation around marriage equality. We're going to be talking about all of that and
- 0:48more so. Thanks so much for being here. Thanks for having me,
- 0:51Lisa. I'm really looking forward to having a conversation about the subject which is
- 0:56rather more glamorous than my day to day affairs or what I argue It've got.
- 1:00I'm excited about it. Thanks. I want to start by asking you
- 1:03about your Instagram bio, which where you call yourself an accidental LGBT activist.
- 1:10Why do you say accidentally, Well, I considered myself to be a mainstream,
- 1:15corporate lawyer. I never set out to do activism. I happened to
- 1:19be queer, so queer issues were obviously important to me, and I ended
- 1:25up doing matters which related to queer issues. But as I did more and
- 1:29more of those matters, it wasn't as much as I got sucked into a
- 1:34queer activism, as I pushed myself into it. I saw the injustices that
- 1:38were prevalent not talked about, not just matters that happened in cored but even
- 1:44in other areas one coursegos So outside the court as well. The endemic injustice
- 1:51that the queer community faced in India made me more sensitive to it. It
- 1:56also because I had the capacity to do something about it. Because I'm a
- 2:00lawyer, I had the tools to do something. I felt compelled morally to
- 2:05intervene and start doing things so and I found it was kind of a self
- 2:08reinforcing cycle. So the more work I did for the queer community, the
- 2:13more help was asked for. And it was a cause I believe, and
- 2:15so I did more. So I think it was a very positive self enforcing
- 2:20cycle. And that's how one day I woke up and say, hey,
- 2:23I'm an accidental activist. You're very humful, but you know it's almost exactly
- 2:29five years now since the reading down of three seven, seven and twenty eighteen
- 2:31September, right sixth September, and I'm sure you remember that day very clearly.
- 2:36I wanted to ask you, looking bad, both as somebody you know,
- 2:40working in this field of law and whealp of my marriage quality too,
- 2:44but also as an out and proud gay man, how do you think things
- 2:47have changed and what has yet to change? You asked about what's changed and
- 2:53what hasn't. And I always like to see and be hopeful and talk about
- 2:57that which has changed. Let's focus in the positive. Because the discrimination had
- 3:00happened in the past or is still happening, we know about it. I
- 3:04don't have to speak much about it. But what's changed really is I think
- 3:08the hope that young queer people have in this country. I travel across the
- 3:14country speaking at schools and colleges to young people, and they believe that tomorrow
- 3:19will be a better day. That today itself isn't too bad, it could
- 3:23be. I mean of course it's not perfect, but that they just filled
- 3:27me with optimism and that really wasn't the case X number of years ago.
- 3:31So it has changed. I think once the Supreme Court has come and told
- 3:36a queer person that you are an equal citizen of India, that the Constitution
- 3:39of India had your back, with the Supreme Court of India will ensure that
- 3:45we will come to your aid, there is a belief in a queer person
- 3:49that they are equal citizens, that they are full citizens of this country,
- 3:52and they're not afraid then to fight and ask for their rights as they should
- 3:57because they know that the courts will come to their aid. Plus the moral
- 4:00authority of the Supreme Court in India, we are religious. Maybe think we
- 4:04are not, but we are. We go to court and threaten to sue
- 4:06for anything and everything. At least that's what I feel as a lawyer.
- 4:10But the idea still is that you believe in the courts. It may take
- 4:15a long time for a judgment to come, they may be multiple appeals,
- 4:17but there is a belief that our legal system works, and there's a belief
- 4:23that the moral authority of the Supreme Court is as universally accepted. So when
- 4:27that institution, endowed as it is with the moral authority, speaks on your
- 4:30behalf and speaks to the country on your behalf, saying that hold it,
- 4:36you are not allowed to discriminate against this previously oppressed minority. It's bound to
- 4:42fill young people with hope. Maybe they will come a time when they become
- 4:45jaded and cynical, but as of now that's not happened, and I'm relishing
- 4:47that moment. I think that young people represent a very powerful foruse, and
- 4:53often, you know, mindsets are so hard to change. Change is really
- 4:57radical. It tends to be incremental with young people because their own their ideas
- 5:00are still forming. They can adopt very quickly a new way of thinking.
- 5:04But I think the unfortunate thing is a lot of the people in positions of
- 5:09power, you know, often quite old people with quite regressive views, that
- 5:14tend to want to continue to exclude and therefore, something like marriage equality,
- 5:17you know, it's kind of worth c notodding along. Now we're equal,
- 5:20so why don't we have this right? We wouldn't have filed the case if
- 5:25we didn't think that the Constitution required the recognition of such a right. There
- 5:29is also arc of history there's also a movement of juris struts across the world
- 5:33in a particular way. So we were reasonably confident. You know, we
- 5:36as lawyers are professional competent or our professional etiquette requires us to argue the case
- 5:44and then trust the process. And if a judgment comes which is in our
- 5:48favor, of course we will rejoice. If a judgment comes against us,
- 5:53we will strive to change society and fight another day. You have an option
- 5:59but white except to judgment as is. But that doesn't mean you just sit
- 6:01back and give up all work. We have been there in the past if
- 6:05you recollect. In twenty thirteen, the Indian Supreme Court had recriminalized homosexuality after
- 6:13the Deli High Court had decriminalized it, So we didn't rest. In twenty
- 6:15thirteen a movement began, carried on by a host of people, not just
- 6:23lawyers who got the publicity like me, but a vast number of grassroots organizations
- 6:28and people tirelessly worked to bring about change in virtually every sphere that they worked
- 6:34in, and we saw the result of it in twenty eighteen, so precisely
- 6:39five years later the laws overturned. But whatever it is able will fight to
- 6:44improve society. There's so much, there's so much to be done totally,
- 6:47and I think that for people who might not have, you know, really
- 6:51thought that this is an issue that pertains to them, I think often the
- 6:55community that fight might not have thought about identity quite as much. The majority
- 7:00tends to be that way kind of just especially you know, you're just a
- 7:02set man. There's a sort of idea that, oh, this is not
- 7:05really about me, like as you know, slight distancing almost because it seems
- 7:11like a minority issue, something that man, but in fact it does.
- 7:14It does impact all our lives. And I love how you said that not
- 7:17only is the reading down of three seven seven Chater freedom for the LGBTQ community,
- 7:23but a beacon of fook for us all and as women particularly. I
- 7:25want to talk about marriage equality because I think queering marriage actually stands to perhaps
- 7:30make it an institution that really needs to be reinvigorated with equality also for women.
- 7:36I mean, it is not an institution historical that has actually really thought
- 7:42much of women's rights either. Yet the marriage is positive as this you know,
- 7:46be all and end all for the woman, Like who are you if
- 7:47you're not in it? So I really think about how all of us have
- 7:51a stake in this actually and should see it that way. And even with
- 7:56three seven seven, actually the law colonially, our law was praised any carnal
- 8:00intercourse against the order esia between men women animals, with the phrasing was such
- 8:05that all if you could participated in fellatio or kind, you're also a criminals,
- 8:09right, So I think we must remember that it pertains to us all.
- 8:13Absolutely. Section three seventy seven was not only about homosexuality, of course,
- 8:18and its application it was, but the strict letter of the law did
- 8:22not restrict itself to homosexuality, and it was a missionary is talking about the
- 8:26missionary position pretty much right, That's all that was allowed. It was framed
- 8:30by mcaulay in a Christian conservative doctrine about certain ways of being. So yes,
- 8:35in terms of the law, it did affect everybody. But we talked
- 8:37about something interesting earlier about how queering marriage or marriage eve quality for the queer
- 8:43community will have an impact on women. But of course, because today marriage
- 8:48is a patriarchal institution, the rules and regulations about marriage, both in terms
- 8:52of the strict letters of the law as well as its application, are a
- 8:56product of patriarchy, rules made by men, administs by men for the benefit
- 9:01of sis head men. And the moment you start challenging the underlying assumption of
- 9:07that doctrine and saying, well, why do you get the veto for?
- 9:09In terms of the queer community, the same question will then be asked by
- 9:15women or indeed all the other excluded classes of people, because you're questioning not
- 9:18only the institution of marriage, marriages and is but a reflection of the inherent
- 9:24patriarchy in our society. So you are actually questioning the underlying root causes of
- 9:30the discrimination. And I think our equality code in our Constitution Article fourteen fifteen
- 9:35sixteen seventeen reach in and promise people that we will smash patriarchy. And that
- 9:41is why I think marriage equality petition is tremendously important, even for women.
- 9:46I think it has implications even for the uniforms civil Code, which is being
- 9:50talked about. Sometimes it's talked about, then it gets out of fashion,
- 9:52then suddenly it's spurred up. I don't know how. It is probably seasonal.
- 9:56So all these issues are so closely intelling because at the end of the
- 10:01day, what is it that the fight of patriarchy represents fight against a patriarchy.
- 10:05It represents a fight to recognize the humanity of each individual and a fight
- 10:11to recognize the equality between any two people in India, and that's a fundamentally
- 10:16basic thing. And as long as you're fighting for those causes, there's bound
- 10:20to be a sense of fraternity which brings everyone together along for this fight.
- 10:24So which is why I say we queer people don't need to just fight by
- 10:28ourselves. We need allies. And honestly, I honestly believe that every person
- 10:33who even today is a homo obe can through the process of education, reform
- 10:39and discussion, we need to change their views. We don't live in a
- 10:41country which believes in revolutions, armed rebellions or the like. We believe in
- 10:46discussion and dialogue and exchange of views. The way I hope this discussion will
- 10:50will make happen. And I think while it's all right to go to court
- 10:54and ask for change and try to as said, smash patriarchy that way,
- 10:58I think another way that is happening is making people realize, as you said,
- 11:01exact me in this together absolutely and it has to change the better for
- 11:05all of us. An extra right that I get, promises and guarantees that
- 11:09a person who will need the same right five, ten, fifteen years down,
- 11:13their children, their uncles, their nephews, their brothers, their friends,
- 11:16all of them will get that right. We need to foster a belief
- 11:20that we live in a society that recognizes the values of rights. We need
- 11:24to be a rights oriented society. That doesn't mean you forget your responsibilities and
- 11:30duties, but I don't see how they're antithetical to each other. Duties will
- 11:33come. But as long as we live in a society where it's okay to
- 11:37fight for your rights and it's not okay for the state to discriminate against you,
- 11:41that will come to the aid of everybody. Just a small example,
- 11:43as you said that even a sis gendered heterosexual man can be discriminated against in
- 11:48some way or the other, maybe at work, or maybe find his rights
- 11:52are violated by the police, if you are wrongfully arrested, or you're stopped
- 11:58at a traffic signal and asked questions which you're not supposed to. Everyone has
- 12:03a bundle of rights, but you all jealously guard and protect. So the
- 12:05moment you have a society where rights are respected for it's least empowered individuals,
- 12:11the rights of even the empowered individuals will be looked out. Absolutely, also
- 12:15want us to just think a little bit about how we got here, and
- 12:18want people wanting to think about that too. You know, there's still over
- 12:20sixty countries where being gay is illegal, and many of them are former British
- 12:24colonies. And how does our colonial history remain, you know, such a
- 12:30sort of blot on some of our rights. I suppose it's been so long
- 12:33that we just see it as a natural way of things. We think it's
- 12:35Indian culture. You know, I've heard this argument mean that queerness is a
- 12:39Western import when actually it's the shame and the stigma that was the Western import.
- 12:43Yeah, absolutely right about that. You know, if you read the
- 12:45ancient religious texts, it's not as though there was this greater borance towards homosexuality.
- 12:52It might not have been celebrated and rejoiced maybe the way the Greeks did.
- 12:56But if you read the Kamasutra, if you lose active homosexuality is illegal.
- 13:00Lawyer, in this back, what you're supposed to do is take a
- 13:03bath and cleanse yourself, so you know, the punishment is miniscule, so
- 13:05it's not seen as a very serious offense. That's even when it's seen as
- 13:09as something wrong. And there are equally texts which do rejoice homosexuality. We
- 13:13have gods and goddesses, the idea of Mohini, the man who becomes transformed
- 13:18into a woman, the idea of the half man half woman. Lord Ayappa
- 13:22himself in Sabriimala is the child of Shiva and Mohini, so to make gods.
- 13:28So the gender fluidity in our culture historically has existed all this and we
- 13:35talk about it in without shame. But what the British date was not only
- 13:41to undermine this gender fluidity or alternative sexuality, but they, in fact,
- 13:46i think, and did all sexuality and the very idea of talking about sex
- 13:52became like a taboo subject and it was not something that was encouraged at all.
- 13:56And that was a problem that what the British gave us. So this
- 14:01colonial legislation which you said, is right not just in India, but still
- 14:05recently in Singapore, still there in Kenya, in a vast amount of African
- 14:09and Middle Eastern countries, all of which are founder colonies. So the same
- 14:13principle of mccaulay's Section three seventy seven exists on their books. And yes,
- 14:16it is a colonial dictat given to us by our white masters. But I
- 14:22don't think we should let ourselves off so easily and say that it was an
- 14:26imposition by the colonial masters. And we got free seventy five years ago.
- 14:31We got our constitution in nineteen fifty. It's not as though we haven't amended
- 14:35our laws since then. Why is it that this section persisted all the way
- 14:39until twenty eighteen. Other Supreme Court had to come and strike it down at
- 14:43a time when you would have fought it's a no brainer. Even at that
- 14:46point, the government couldn't bring itself to amend the law by itself and say
- 14:50all right, this is no longer a crime. They said in court at
- 14:54that point of time. I remember that we leave it to the court to
- 14:56decide. Why Why should a matter of detection of rights be only the job
- 15:01and function of the courts. Is it okay for the government not to recognize
- 15:07and foster our rights? No, absolutely not. It's meant to be a
- 15:09joint effort. I can go to court when the government violates my rights,
- 15:13but that doesn't get the government card blanche to start violating my rights. In
- 15:16fact, it is the responsibility to ensure that my rights are recognized. So
- 15:22I actually say that it is not just the colonial imposition, but I think
- 15:26it was our adoption and internalization of the colonial mindset that has happened, which
- 15:31is persistent for the seventy five years. Indian culture is all well in code,
- 15:35but our Indian mindset is not the mindset of a Kamaso threat today.
- 15:39That's not how the average man or a woman on the sweet things. They
- 15:43are not followers, but sayan they are. In fact, they have adopted
- 15:46an internalized by collead. And that is a problem with our country today,
- 15:50that we've shed a glorious, beautiful past and adopted a peculiar version of what
- 15:54we consider our ancient morality to be, which is nothing to do with what
- 16:00it actually is. But it's become now the norm to say, you know,
- 16:03and I blame television serials on this, this projection of godliness being asexual,
- 16:10being a woman in a particular form so removed from our ancient history and
- 16:15so removed from our religious cultural texts. But that is seen as a person
- 16:19who maybe does not know any better, as maybe the religious dogma. They
- 16:23think that that is the truth because that is what has been fed to us.
- 16:27And also, I suppose one of the reasons for that is we do
- 16:30not have a canonical text the way there are the people of the book,
- 16:33Abrahamic religions, Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, where you can turn to
- 16:38a text and say, well, this text says this, and therefore this
- 16:41is not immoral or this is immoral. Hindu philosophy, and I'm talking of
- 16:45Hindu philosophy as eighty percent of the country is not forgetting that. Of course,
- 16:49there are minorities in our country as well, but speaking of Hindu philosophy,
- 16:53our texts are always more accommodating, partly because very often like the judgments
- 16:59of the contradictory, because they deal with humanity, and they even at gods
- 17:06have human sides to them, human feelings. They're softer creatures than the all
- 17:12powerful God telling you what to do what not to do. So I think
- 17:18it's time to go back and maybe read our scriptures and reflect on what we
- 17:22were and ponder about why we become what we become. And yet, I
- 17:26mean all great texts religious texts also have the issues and we should be able
- 17:30to point that out in the idea that religious texts are the un censure,
- 17:33which is another idea that seems to be increasingly rapid globally. It's another really
- 17:40problematic thing, you know, for example, America repealing they're right to abortion
- 17:42on these touch grounds. And even in our texts, there's misogyny, there's
- 17:47the cost system. There's a lot of things that we should also discard.
- 17:52So I think being critical right being critical. It's so unfortunate that being critical
- 17:56becomes being anti national. I think it is such an active national as to
- 18:00introspect on your own culture and history because you love this country. Why else
- 18:03would you do it if you didn't care, why would you criticize or hope
- 18:07for something better? Anyway, I want to move on also to the topic
- 18:11of metal grade. Since we were talking about marriage and how it hasn't always
- 18:15been the greatest for women. I think to put it in my region,
- 18:18I think that agency, the idea of agency sexual agency is a very for
- 18:25me as a non law person. When I look at certain laws, whether
- 18:27it's age of consent laws, whether it's matal grape, it's very peculiar to
- 18:32me because it feels like, I never really have agency. You know,
- 18:34as a teenager, I can't have consensual sex with someone who might be in
- 18:37love with and as a wife, I can't have a contribute sex. So
- 18:41like, what is going on here? Why does my agency have so little
- 18:45legal standing? The answer is patriarchy. The idea is we had the laws
- 18:51of adultery. Again recently, till twenty eighteen, there was a law which
- 18:56criminalized adultery where the husband of a woman who had committed adultery could sue the
- 19:03man who she had had sex with, because the underlying idea was but the
- 19:07woman couldn't sue the husband for adultly done by him. The idea is that
- 19:11the woman is a property of the man. Another man has come and taken
- 19:12over my property, I my wife. This chattelization of women is the ultimate
- 19:18objectification of women. And one consequence of the objectification of women is to see
- 19:22them as property and therefore deny them their rights. It's a way to control
- 19:27female genital nucleation is one way to control sexuality. Denying consent, denying them
- 19:33permission to refuse to have sex is another way to deny agency. So it's
- 19:37all part of the same problem that we talked of earlier. It's patriarchal institution,
- 19:41I mean position to criminalizing that, you know. I mean it's so
- 19:48bizarre to mean that men will protest the idea that martal rape will no longer
- 19:52be permissible, that there'll be like boycott marriage trending on Twitter, and like
- 19:56if you want to boycott marriage because you'll be allowed to your wife be who
- 20:00wants to marry you, you know you might want to break this tattooed on
- 20:04your forehead. Absolutely right, But I think you expect too much, maybe
- 20:10from a community that had rights for two law. I think they're so used
- 20:15to being Mama's boys and getting exactly what they want that for them to say
- 20:19that, no, no, you can't have this right anymore, it's not
- 20:22going to be easy. That doesn't mean that every cissect man thinks like that.
- 20:26I'm sure the vast majority doesn't agree with the marital rating. If you
- 20:30just explain it to them in how it won't be a view. One big
- 20:33thing is, oh, this is a provision that will be abused automatically ninety
- 20:37eight a dow it's abused by every provision of the law can be abused.
- 20:41That you that does not mean you allow an illegal act to happen without any
- 20:47recourse. A woman who has genuinely been mutilated and rapped by her husband can't
- 20:52be denied her rights on the ground that, oh, some other woman may
- 20:55some point misuse this law right. That to me is perverse way of thinking,
- 21:00but it is a way of thinking. So we have to deal with
- 21:02that and tell people that show them with statistics that their fear is unfounded,
- 21:07that this is actually just a narrative built around the media that these laws are
- 21:11violated, when in fact they're not really violated, and most research shows they're
- 21:15not violated. And even if it is, you cannot permit a woman who
- 21:19has a right over her bodily autonomy which has been infringed in the most brutal
- 21:23form possible by a person who is closest to her. Imagine just what is
- 21:27happening in this woman's mind. She's married to a man an Indian society,
- 21:33in Hindu society, her husband is everything to her. I don't agree with
- 21:36this, but that is how Indian marriages are. And that man in whom
- 21:40you have the maximum trust proceeds to treat you like an animal and rape you
- 21:44and then you can't say anything about it at all, because I mean,
- 21:48it's unacceptable. And I think what's really unfortunate is that when the group with
- 21:52power, when a member of the group with power does something wrong, it
- 21:56seems the exception one bad man, okay, when the group without power,
- 22:00one person does misuses whatever, false allegation, whatever it becomes. Oh,
- 22:03all women are liars, yes, you know, and this has even with
- 22:07me too, a sexual assault. The fact is it is unde reported.
- 22:12Okay, so three and a half people make a false allegation. The reality
- 22:17is many, many, many sexual assaults the majority experience for women, and
- 22:19most people do not report it because it is too traumatic a process and I'm
- 22:23not even sure they'll get any justice. It's just reliving that, you know.
- 22:27So yeah, all of these So it's so unfortunate that on the grounds
- 22:30of oh, you know, these people who anyway have very few rights,
- 22:34are going to misuse this right. Even if that happens, it's highly unlikely
- 22:38that that would be the majority of how it doesn't happen exactly, And the
- 22:42reality is that, like as a woman, and I can't believe I've have
- 22:47to say this so many times recently. It just blows my mind. The
- 22:49statistic, were you to die by murder, the most likely person to kill
- 22:53you is your current or formal partner, right husband, So I mean the
- 23:00satistics are domestic abuse around around that type of thing is us unacceptable. The
- 23:04fact that we're still are debating why the matter I feel it should be allowed
- 23:07or not is a commune bit disenchanting with regard to the citizen ry. You
- 23:11know, like come on, come on, wake up, wake up.
- 23:15There's many little gens like this actually that existed in a statute book, but
- 23:19all of them underlie same problems. A group with power, drunken power,
- 23:25used to their own power, refusing to accept the fact that they have the
- 23:27power. You know, there's the whole Men's Right movement, and there the
- 23:32groups you can see and they discuss the cases about look the judgment happened.
- 23:36There's a complete belief that they are the victim. And you just have to
- 23:40walk and see around yourselves and ask yourself which worlds are these people living in?
- 23:45And they give you an example of dowry earlier in terms of the fear
- 23:48of four ninety eight A and the abuse of the anti dowry laws. If
- 23:53the system is so abused, how is it that dowry is still endemic?
- 23:57It just comes. I mean, are we saying we live in a country
- 24:00without dowry? And any man honestly put the hand of their heart and say
- 24:04that. So, if there's a law that was getting abused, you would
- 24:07thought to the perpetrators potentially would stop doing this right Obeously, it's not getting
- 24:12misused. Obviously, it's not even getting used. As you said about POSH,
- 24:15the Prevention of Sexual Harassment Act, the idea is that this woman is
- 24:18this herodon who will come and ruin all the lives of these honest men.
- 24:23Whereas there is constant, unsupervised harassment of women at every level, not only
- 24:30in the organized sector, but particularly within homes in the non organized sector,
- 24:37and women have no recourse because where will a woman who is earning daily wages
- 24:44go to have her grievances redressed. And you're saying, let's take this right
- 24:48away from her. In terms of POSH or ABC, the measly rights that
- 24:52the woman has, which aim only tried to somewhat mitigate the disadvantage that she
- 24:57has, let's take those away because they maybe misused. Well, what about
- 25:02the abuse of authority that men do every day without any law stopping. Then
- 25:07I want to also talk to you about what is perhaps a more you know,
- 25:11a law globally that has a less unanimous answer, even among the left,
- 25:17and that's the age of consent laws. What's so interesting is that some
- 25:19of the most developed countries in the world actually have quite a young age of
- 25:22consent, like Canavian countries, Western European countries have you know, fourteen fifteen,
- 25:27it's often fourteen fifteen, not even sixteen. I think it's sixteen.
- 25:30In the US it was sixteen year we made it eighteen. So in the
- 25:33developing world, there's a perspective that increasing the age of consent. At one
- 25:37point it was twelve. Child marriage was a thing, right, is you
- 25:41know, something that allows for women and children to benefit, Right, Increasing
- 25:45the age of consent is progressive. On the other hand, some of these
- 25:49super developed countries with the greatest human rights records or whatever, have actually quite
- 25:55a young age of consent, right, And it's something that lawmakers globally seem
- 25:59not to have a single answer too. And I'm not sure. I feel
- 26:03like maybe there have to be a bunch of different laws where consensual sex between
- 26:07teenagers similar in age should be acknowledged that is going to happen. They deserve
- 26:11to be able to buy condoms, they deserve to be able to get an
- 26:12abortion if they need to, So why criminalize that. You're only making it
- 26:17more difficult for them to navigate their health. And perhaps in order to protect
- 26:22miners from abuse, there should be maybe different laws for you know, adults
- 26:26and relationships with miners, even if consensual. I understand that any sex under
- 26:30eighteen and you just considered rape, but isn't it a bit I mean with
- 26:33regard to consensual sex between teenagers similar in age, that's something we're just too
- 26:38squeamish about, right, And there's very gendered also, the ideas that the
- 26:42man is always the perpetrator of the woman is victim. I mean I could
- 26:45be a queer teenager, I could be you know, just the gendering off
- 26:48it, the age. I feel like it needs some examination. I'd love
- 26:52to hear your thoughts. I think part of the problem is the idea that
- 26:56you can have sex only within marriage. So the ages of consent for marriage
- 27:00have been confused with the age of consent for sex. So a lot of
- 27:03the movement that is happening about increasing the age of consent has to do with
- 27:08when a woman can have children in the institution of marriage, and therefore make
- 27:12it eighteen or make it twenty one. But we must remember that's about marriage,
- 27:17and you can have sex without marriage, you know. Surprise, surprise.
- 27:19Yeah, it's twenty twenty three. As you said, maybe someone's watching
- 27:22this in twenty twenty four, and this will be a timeless interview, so
- 27:26you know, maybe in thirty years. So this was recorded in twenty twenty
- 27:30three. But sex is not necessarily only within the bound of marriage, and
- 27:34therefore having an age of consent which is so high, which is artificially high,
- 27:40creates a whole pool of criminals. Right, We are all, as
- 27:42victims say said in three seventy seven, unconvicted felons. It's ridiculous to imagine
- 27:48that people ages of sixteen and seventeen aren't having sex with other people who are
- 27:52also maybe aged sixteen and seventeen. You're basically telling them that your rapists.
- 27:56The law has condemned you and made you into a rapist. What does that
- 28:00say about law society and its efficacy when you are brutally condemning so many citizens
- 28:06into a sense of criminality of their own. So I think these artificially high
- 28:11ages for consent for six not marriage is absolutely erroneous. They must be much
- 28:18lower to match what life actually is. It's not a novel proposition. And
- 28:22this happens in jurisdictions across the world. What are called Romeo and Juliet clauses
- 28:27is that it is the law should be. That really is something the legislatures
- 28:32should look in. We have something called the pup soldiers. A prevention of
- 28:33transexual offense is that supposing you have a nineteen year old man and an eighteen
- 28:37year old or seventeen year old girl, how about even eighteen year old and
- 28:41one day old man and seventeen and three sixty four days one, if they
- 28:47have sex, it's a crime now, And as you said, the dissumption
- 28:48is that's the man who's a perpetator. What we need is a Romeo and
- 28:52Juliet clause that as long as they are within X number of years of each
- 28:56other, then that is not and it's consensual, then it's not rape.
- 28:59And that's I see. You know, as lawyers, we see these problems
- 29:02coming to court all the time, and that's one of the marital rape exemptions
- 29:06helps it has its uses. So what often happens in couples where the woman
- 29:11is under eighteen and the man is over eighteen and there's an allegation of rape
- 29:15by the family of the woman who's trying to stop this marriage because it's a
- 29:18love marriage, they will come and say this is a statutory rape and get
- 29:22the man arrested. So the family of the woman at that point, very
- 29:25typically, if they're still in love, the man and woman marry, and
- 29:27once you're married, they say, well, they can't be rape because because
- 29:30you are married, there is a marital rape exception. So it's so complicated,
- 29:34the city of the law, the abuse of the law. But humanity
- 29:38is humanity. You know, people will find ways to love. You can't
- 29:41stop that, and to the extent that the law impinges on it, you'll
- 29:45find ways around it. You're not going to stop something as be sic as
- 29:48the act of love and the act of loving. Let's talk about obscenity laws
- 29:52as well. I think that the idea of obscenity is so subjective, right,
- 29:57what might be obseen to you be perfectly fine to me, and vice
- 30:00versa. Another colonially real law, and another one that's often used in the
- 30:04name of protecting women and children, you know Runba's things bum for example,
- 30:07I was very happy to see. I don't know why they think we need
- 30:11to be protected, women need to be protected from that imagery omen. But
- 30:15I mean it was some kind of women's rights thing of like, oh this
- 30:18is offensive to women, right, the legal rocket that was raised around that.
- 30:22But this idea of like sexuality is obscene, you know, this idea
- 30:26that basically women could never want sex. Women don't want sex, right,
- 30:30so women must be protected from sex to live with their husband, and then
- 30:33they can't refuse sex because they don't actually want it. But now, I
- 30:37mean, you know late, yeah, it's an absurd right. So even
- 30:40I mean Ufi Jave or Punam Pandy or any sexually confident woman who is publicly
- 30:45demonstrating and comfort in our sexuality is typically on the receiving end of at the
- 30:48very least moral panic and at the most some obscenity case. I don't know.
- 30:52It's another thing which I wonder how we can re look at because firstly,
- 30:56what is obscene is so subjective. The phrasing is also extremely strange,
- 31:00right, something that appeals to the sivious and prurient interests do deprave and corrupt.
- 31:04I mean, I often worry, like you know, I'm gonna call
- 31:07you if anyone if correct the tendency to deprave and corrupt? Now, what
- 31:14is that? Right? What I mean, it's such a subjective, very
- 31:17famous line of judgment that I know it when I see it. So there
- 31:19is of course a great amount of subjectivity and our obscenity laws, and I
- 31:22think there are the archaic and it is another attempted patriarchy and protecting the body
- 31:27of the woman. For instance, why is it ok to be a topist
- 31:30man but not a topless woman? And most of us well just well obviously
- 31:33you can't. That's obscene, right if you show a woman's naked torsal,
- 31:37but a man can have a naked torsion, no problem. So I think
- 31:41that is an instance of patriarchy, that we automatically categorized one particular natural way
- 31:47of being of a woman to be obscene, and thereby putting forcing a woman
- 31:51to down extrac clothes and there if I controlling her body, and how much
- 31:53of a chicken expose coding it in shame, it's coding it in shame,
- 31:57so it is just a form of patriarchy again our obsentity laws. Instead,
- 32:01what is required is for our obscenity laws to actually protect women against exploitation.
- 32:08You need laws where if there is any evidence or absence of consent or it
- 32:14demeans the idea of what it is to be a woman in the eyes of
- 32:17a man in terms of stereotyping or a particular form of demeaning portrayal of women
- 32:22that should be obscene and not obscene only on the ground of the fact that
- 32:25you're showing body part of a woman, but how you conveigh the image of
- 32:30the woman if you wanted to protect a woman. I think some of the
- 32:32serials that we show on Indian cinema are obscene frankly, where a woman is
- 32:37shown as this hapless, you know, woman who has just no sense or
- 32:42no choice and no intelligence. That is demeaning to a woman more than a
- 32:45strong, confident woman wearing something very low cut and structing about confident in a
- 32:51sexuality. But it comes back to patriarchy because it's okay for a man to
- 32:55cover up that woman. And I saw that even contru is body though,
- 33:00so it's a funny one, except basically, all bodies are obscene. If
- 33:05naked, you know that sex is obscene. Bodies are obscene, the idea
- 33:09that there's something dirty and degrading. Inherently, it doesn't even matter. We're
- 33:14not putting a specific lens to whether this is how someone wanted to be portrayed
- 33:17or not. We don't differentiate sufficiently between let's say, revenge on and like
- 33:22an image I want to publish of myself to whoever is consenting to look at
- 33:27it on my platform, right, and therefore I wonder, and because it's
- 33:30so subjective and I'm not sure what the recourses even these platforms, for example,
- 33:34will have rather gender, female nipples are band and it's all in the
- 33:37guys wanting to protect women. But I think as a society we'll be able
- 33:42to remove that shame. Why wouldn't it be great it one day pictures of
- 33:45a woman's dosso could not be used to shame her, just like and therefore
- 33:51who cares if my pictures of my that's my an active normalization exactly, an
- 33:55active acceptance and an fact of the realization of the fact that sex exists the
- 34:01body. Yes, but that's just we just caught up again colonial era mindset.
- 34:07Absolutely, it's not the time when the starary was one without a blow.
- 34:09Completely the idea of the unsticked government though you know we have had that
- 34:14in Indiana culture always. But these obscenity laws, you're right, are trying
- 34:17to shame us and trying to thereby control us. But to your point about
- 34:23sex and obscenity, there is a tarn ink. If you write a book
- 34:27about describing the sexual act, it will be to be obscene because of course
- 34:30we don't have sex. We're a country or one point three billion people.
- 34:34I don't know how that happened, but we don't have sex exactly. So
- 34:37anyway, I think we should introspect a little on all those counts. Okay,
- 34:39my last question is we wrap up. I know that you like to
- 34:44be optimistic, and so do I, but slightly philosophical question. Do you
- 34:47think that progress is linear, like every things will get better, you know,
- 34:52or do you think I mean, I'm starting to begin to believe that
- 34:54maybe it's just a regression to the meaning you know, we were progressive and
- 35:00colonial laws now or like abortion and abortion is revealed. I mean, I
- 35:02don't know. Sometimes I wonder whether we actually do get better and more equal
- 35:07and have more access to equality, dignity, fraternity always want to our values
- 35:10globally, or whether in fact it's like a seesaw. You know, we
- 35:15take five steps forward and then ten steps back. Well, it is a
- 35:17seesaw, but I wouldn't say we take five steps forward and ten back.
- 35:21I'd say we take ten forward and five back. So and I often talk
- 35:24about Martin Luther King and other people said that the arc of history always bends
- 35:29towards justice. Yes, we will have advances in our rights to be followed,
- 35:34maybe very rapidly by those rights being taken away from us, which makes
- 35:37it all the more bitter. A right that you had is taken away,
- 35:39abortion in the US being one example, right against homosexuality in twenty thirteen in
- 35:44India being an example, we thought you had a right was taken away.
- 35:46But I believe we're getting a more progressive society. Things are not linear.
- 35:52That's why use the term arc. It gets better till it doesn't. Then
- 35:55it becomes a bit bad, but then it becomes better again. For the
- 35:59general move movement is I think increasingly towards greater freedoms, and that is the
- 36:06principles on which our constitution was framed, and I think that is the life
- 36:09people want to lead, and history has shown us from nineteen fifty to twenty
- 36:15twenty three, if it were a linear, straight, or even degrading.
- 36:19While it is not a perfect place to be a woman India today in twenty
- 36:22twenty three, I assure you it's better than nineteen fifty. While I may
- 36:27not, as of the twenty ninth of August twenty twenty three, have the
- 36:31right to get married as a queer person, today, my life today is
- 36:35still better than it was in nineteen fifty. Things have improved dramatically. We
- 36:40forget the pain of the past. We must, We should maybe remember it
- 36:44only to remind ourselves how far we've come and how well we've done for ourselves.
- 36:47Maybe forgetting the pain of the past is a natural human reaction. I
- 36:52suppose that's why people have more than one children. I've child, but it
- 36:54is so painful. I'm surprised that someone has a second. I'm third.
- 36:58I don't know what my mother was on. But tend to forget unpleasantness of
- 37:00the past, because who wants to deal with that? But I think it's
- 37:04sometimes important for us to remember where we have come from, to see how
- 37:07far we've reached. For my optimism is not just in the air. I've
- 37:12seen such radical examples of it. Indian society today, while may still be
- 37:16homophobic to some extent, accepts trans people far more than it is accepted in
- 37:22the West. There is an increasingly greater acceptance of people across the board,
- 37:27certainly amongst young people, but even amongst older people. People my parent generation.
- 37:31I'd rather call myself ol also, and I have better do it my
- 37:35generation. Things are changing things for the better. But remember another US Supreme
- 37:39Court judgment in the context of abortion, and maybe can wrap it up is
- 37:44in plant parent Wood versus Casey. Just the esteem that they're writing for the
- 37:46majority, so that the price for liberty is constant vigilance. So if you
- 37:52want to make sure that you are free, you always have to be aware
- 37:55and willing to fight fair rights because it can always slip back. So be
- 38:00aware. Citizens, know that you have come, but you can go back
- 38:04and be ready to fight. Don't expect other people to fight for you,
- 38:07fight for yourself. Thank you, Thanks so much, Sarah. It's so
- 38:09much fun chatting with you, and you've got me righted up about so many
- 38:14issues. It's so great to hear the perspectives from a lawyer as accomplished as
- 38:16you. Thank you so much for being with us, and thank you to
- 38:20everyone who has tuned in to Love Matters today. If you'd like to write
- 38:23into us, you can do so at Love Matters at BW dot com.
- 38:27Love Matters is produced by Indian Express and DW, Germany's international broadcaster. We'd
- 38:32love it if you like and share and follow this podcast wherever you're listening to
- 38:37it. And the next time, this is Nee Lisa ango Us signing up.
- 38:39I believe Love Matters