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The Path Is Fulfilled Through the Cultivation of Inward and Outward Peace · Sri Aurobindo Studies

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  It is a frequent occurrence. Someone takes up the spiritual
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  path and tries to follow the dictates set forth in that path
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  down to the smallest detail. They treat goals and aspirations
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  as a type of rule book that needs to be followed if, as is
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  to be expected, they do not succeed.
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  In each such detail they can get into a cycle of self criticism.
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  In some cases this simply breeds an obsessive state of mind and
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  an emotional reaction, but in others it can actually lead them
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  to take up acts of violence against themselves in the form
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  of various sorts of self-inflicted corporal
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  punishments. While it is a good thing that
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  they are observing and paying attention to the little habits
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  that generally go unnoticed, and they are intent on changing them
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  in a positive direction, they seem to be going about things in
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  a manner which is seriously counterproductive.
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  First, this obsessive focus implies that there is intense
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  concentration on the external nature instead of a shift of the
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  focus to the divine. Second, the methods employed do
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  not actually tend to control these behaviours over the long
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  term. Rather, they suppress the energy
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  they are trying to control, which actually can increase
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  their power, similar to the way that compressing a spring stores
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  enormous energy that eventually gets released in a more intense
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  manner. Third, the mind and the vital
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  tend to be disturbed and lose the sense of peace and serenity
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  that are actually the basis for opening up the receptivity of
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  the being to the higher forces. If the seeker can develop peace
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  and undertake to observe and not become fixated on micromanaging
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  the habits of the nature but simply not get caught up in
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  them, the power of the forces that need to be adjusted or
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  changed will actually diminish over time with patience and
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  perseverance in the method. The secret is not to let these
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  habits disturb while simultaneously not providing
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  them any sanction from the mind, vital or physical being.
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  The mother adds additional insight about the actual lack of
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  central importance these external circumstances, events,
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  or habits have in the spiritual path.
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  The basis is peace, the path is peace, and the result is due to
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  the receptivity and shift of focus that can only come when we
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  reduce the importance of and focus on these external things,
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  including those that take place within one's own province of
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  being, so to speak. The mother note quote.
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  This morning as I was glancing over the month at his beginning
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  and wondering how I could serve thee better, I heard the small
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  voice within, like a murmur in the silence.
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  And this is what it said to me. See how very little all outer
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  circumstances matter. Why strive and strain so to
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  realize thy own conception of truth?
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  Be more supple, more trusting. The only duty is not to let
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  oneself be troubled by anything. To torment oneself about doing
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  the right thing causes as much harm as of bad will.
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  Only in a calm as of deep waters can be found the possibility of
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  true service. And this reply was so luminous
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  and pure. It carried within itself such a
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  striking reality that the state it described was communicated
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  without any difficulty. It seemed to me I was floating
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  in the calm of deep waters. I understood.
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  I saw clearly what the best attitude would be, and now I
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  have only to ask thee, O Sublime Master, my Supreme Teacher, to
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  give me the strength and clear sightedness I need to remain
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  constantly in this state. Do not torment thyself, child.
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  Silence. Peace.
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  Peace. End Quote Reference Sri
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  Arrovindo and the Mother Looking from within, Chapter 1.
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  Looking at Life and Circumstances, page 31.