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SMNTY Gets De-Influenced · Stuff Mom Never Told You

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Annie and Samantha. I don't become to stuff.
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: I never told your question, but I heeart radio. And
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: today we are so so, so so happy to be
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: joined by the amazing, much missed, fabulous Bridget Odd. Thank
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: you for joining us, Bridget, Oh, thank you for having me.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: It's been too long. Also, I always say this, you'll
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: give me that. Your intro is always give me like
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: warm fuzzies inside. Always such a fussant intro. I do
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: think about it. I'm like, how can I like give
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: Bridget enough weight so people understand how amazing? Yes, they
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: don't understand the pre conversations we have. That's literally just
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: catching up with you, like no, really we miss you.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Where have you been? Is so mutual. We're like the neediest, like, yeah,
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: I gets a little stock wards. Just fine, it's fine,
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: it's all good. It's all good. I didn't want to
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: ask because it has been a minute. Uh how have
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: you been? And also how is your weirdo? Christmas? Oh, yes,
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: thank you for asking. So I have been good. We're no.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: Christmas was actually a success. So we were in West Virginia,
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: which is typically are we like to go on the
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: is it the Potomac River or the Shenandoah River, one
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: of one of the rivers out on the mid Atlantic Um.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: It was beautiful but very cold. We started a new
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: tradition where we have like an outdoor evening even though
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: it's like twenty degrees outside around the fire. So I
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: had to wear like long John's and multiple pairs of pants,
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: and then for outerwear like fake for but like a
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: fake fur hat, a fake for a vest um. So
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: that was really fun. Yeah, it was great, lots of
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: shenanigans and weirdness and all of the and then I
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: got to have probably the most involved, non weirdo Christmas
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: of my adult life because my family wouldn't really do Christmas,
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: and so for the first time, the entire Todd family
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: gathered together in the same place to actually have a
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: Christmas and it was lovely. So holidays were great. How
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: about you two? What did what did we end up doing? Well? Uh,
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: it's snow, that was one thing, because yeah did well,
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: it was snow likely some places, but we did have
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: freezing weather, so it went down to ten degrees in
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: a lot of places with high windshield factors. And for
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: the South, we never are prepared for anything. Below like
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: thirty five. How dare you? Um? But yeah, it was
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: especially cold. Yeah, you were more in the mountains any right,
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: so you've got some snow. I went to visit my
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: family and they live in the mountains. And I don't
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: know if you know this about me, bridge it, but
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: I hate driving. I don't drop anyway. I didn't know
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: that about you. So it's snowed and I was like,
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: it's time, many You've got to get out there. But
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: it was Yeah, it was good. It was fun. Uh.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know if this has been
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: your experience, but I feel like since the pandemic, I'm
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: a very big tradition person because it marks the passing
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: of time. Um, and I feel like even though I'm
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: doing these tradition things, it doesn't have the same weight
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: of like, oh it's a new year or whatever it is.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: So that was kind of my this year. I was like, oh,
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: I guess, oh, yeah, Christmas happened, and now I go
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: back to work. I don't know, it was interesting. Yeah. Yeah.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: I think in general we've talked about how little we
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: like Christmas, But for me, it's the thing I thought
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: about this last year because now it's become the partner
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: and what happens when you are in a relationship and
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: how you have to divide the time, especially when our
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: families are two different places, so mine are in the
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: mountains of Georgia, his are spread through like Florida in
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: South Carolina, so we have to like kind of compromise
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: and see how to divide the time. And for this year,
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: we went down to Florida to see his family. It
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: was lovely, but yeah, we also have become new homeowners,
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: and because of that freeze again Atlanta, Georgia, we're not prepared,
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: so there are many conversations about pipes bursting and things
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: had going wrong because it froze and all these things.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: So we had a panic moment of getting like friends
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: and neighbors to go check and make sure we didn't
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: have a flood or whatever. So it was a new
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: level of worry on top of being with family. But
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: it was enjoyable. Don't get me wrong, his family is
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: really great. But yeah, it's just been like it's new
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: new for me, like trying these new I guess we're
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: starting new traditions, except hopefully not like the homeowner stuff,
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: but the just tried come like combine that and it's
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: an interesting conversation about relationships, compromise, and communicating. That's what
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: my Christmas was. Yeah, I hope this is not like
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: the annual frozen pipes tradition. No, I don't need that,
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: we don't want that. I can't afford that. Samantha gave
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: me this list of holiday movies to watch this year.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: I think you would appreciate a Bridget, It would be
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: right up your alley. I feel like you would have
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: liked those. Actually what's on the list because it was
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: like the rom coms of the holiday, and it's the
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: love hate that people have of the of rom coms.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: And a lot of them were like New Year's movies
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: as well, because Bridget Jones's Diary was in that list,
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: and that's typically more of a New Year's thing. Um,
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: and I believe that While you were Sleeping, which is
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: also on my list, is also a New Year's thing.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: So yeah, I gave her a list, and uh, it
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: took her out of her comfort zone. But I didn't
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: think about your thought. Bridget would really would appreciate my
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: One of the annual traditions of udo Christmas is that
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: you get messed up and watch really terrible Christmas movies,
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: like some Hallmark movies. You know, the cheesier the better.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: It's kind of like I hate watch you're watching to
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: make fun of slash talk over, but some of them
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: will really get you. In the end You're like, actually,
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: this is like legitimately I'm invested now, like you're of Christmas.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: Love it? I love it. I do have a question
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: for you that I swear leads into what we're talking
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: about today, which I'm very excited to talk about. Okay, yes,
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: Uh do you have like a favorite article of clothing?
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: Do you have like a thing that you just buy
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: way too many things of Oh my god, I do.
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: I do so many. This is part of the reason
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: why I wanted to do this episode, is a little
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: bit of like I don't know, like checking myself a
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: little bit um one of them. This is gonna sound strange.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: Is leather any kind of leather or like pleather pany?
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: I love a full leather legging and it can be
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: hard to get the right one. You know, you're buying
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: them online and so you're like, I'm gonna buy three
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: and I'll return the two that don't you say that?
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: And then you never do so. One is definitely any
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: kind of leather pant, leather, short leather legging. I'm always
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: looking for the perfect pair. I have so many it's
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: it's shameful and embarrassing. Another is running shoes. Ever since
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: I broke my ankle, I think two years ago now,
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: and before breaking my ankle, I could I could like
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: run four miles and a pair of ballet flat and
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: not give it a thought. Now, if I tie my
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: shoes wrong, it is a problem. And so you know,
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: good supportive running shoes. For whatever reason, I'm I've really
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: gotten into that. How about how about you all, like,
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: what is your thing where you have way too many
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: of them? It's like your it's like your thing. Well,
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: I mean it's probably cosplay, but you don't say during
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: the pandemic, I would say sweatpants, Like I'm I've become
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: a real like, oh those look like really cute comfortable sweatpants. Um,
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: that's been my biggest thing. But jackets before, I love jackets.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: My mom makes fun of me every year, She's like,
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: you don't need another jacket in like, but look at
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: that one though, Well, the jacket can make an outfit.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: You really can, yes, really, and It's like it could
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: change like everything number one casual to fancy and then
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: like heartbeat. Yeah. Well, I feel like I've talked about
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: my many times and many people make fun of me
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: because I am a cardigan sweater girl and I happened
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: since early two thousand's. You can't break that from me.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: You can't take that from me. And uh, I look
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: like a grandma at all times everything. I just love
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: the comfort of the coziness. I use it as a jacket. Literally,
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: I rarely wear jackets because I have cardigans, no matter
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: how thick. I found a poncho that I love that
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: was even better. I was like, oh, yeah, here we go.
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: But that is that has been a thing. I feel
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: like it's kind of synonymous with who I am is
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: my Grandma's letters and I will die before you could
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: take it out of my hands. I mean, the classics
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: are a classic for a reason. You know, the cardigan
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: They got it right the first time every time. Well,
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: so I have never heard of this that you're you've
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: brought to us today, bridget So it's the influencing, that's right,
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: the influencing. And I guess it's it's a it's it's
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: exactly like what it sounds like. I'll give you a
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: good definition of it later in the episode, but you know,
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: spoiler alert, it's like exactly what it sounds like. If
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: you know what influencing is, it's sort of doing that
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: in reverse. And so a good sort of counter question
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: to the really good question that you started with is
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: do you have stuff that you saw online and you're like, oh,
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: that will be cute and then you are like I
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: need that, and then you buy it and when it
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: arrives you're just sort of like, Wow, I didn't really
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: need this. Now it just sits in my apartment. I'm underwhelmed.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Why did I buy this? Yeah? Yes, I get ideas
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: stuck in my head where I'll see something and I'll
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: be like I don't need that, and then like three
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: days later, I'm still thinking about it, even if I
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: don't want to. It just is like it lodges in
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: my brain. Um. And so during the pandemic, I have
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: Instagram has gotten me a couple of times where I
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: think before the pandemic I was pretty good about like no,
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: I don't need that. During the pandemic, I think it's
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: like a stress outlet almost like maybe this will make
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: me feel better. Uh, and it has been like sweatpants
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: and bras and under comfort comfort clothes. And then I'm
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: also I'm a huge fan of things as we were
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: talking about before this, I'm a huge fan of like
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: Star Wars and Last of Us, So anything like that
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: can get me pretty good. Yeah, it's kind of annoring.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: There's so much Star Wars stuff like that out there,
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: Like you need the Star Wars or like so much stuff, right,
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: I mean you need to figure out And obviously for
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: one of the purchases I made was for my partner
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: and I got them a light up what are those
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: robots at at at right, like the ones that eighties
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: whatever I call them at at Apparently I don't know.
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: This is how little I know. Okay, don't come from me.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: Well this is a different podcast, but that is okay.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: But like I bought that for them because I saw
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: it online as like I think I had been searching
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: for guests for Annie and that popped up and I
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: knew my partner would really like it. So I ended
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: up being good. But I did make another purchase where
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: it was like I was, I'd have this thing. This
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: is I guess it's just another love letter to Annie,
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: because we do this thing where we hang out often
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: and then I'm like, I have to buy a thing
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: for my partner Annie and myself, Like I don't know why.
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: It's always that and it has to become like it's
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: not the best BFF necklaces, but it's matching for sure.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: We could match probably a week at like a week
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: at a time, like we could. But one of those
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: of those, like because we were watching stupid Game of
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: Thrones I think or was just about to end or
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: something along those lines, and they had these really cool
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: supposedly lighters that will never die and it has really
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: cool engravings, and you're, yeah, that does not work. I
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: think it lights up. It lit up one time and
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: never again. I hate how they get It's like a scam.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: I hate how they get it. It is. I will say,
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: at least I received it, but it took like months
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: for me to get it. Not a good sign. Not
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: a good sign. I had this exact same problem. I
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: have so many products that I bought recently, literally only
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: because I saw them on social media that I really
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: don't need. My big one that happened that came recently
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: is the Stanley water bottle, which I had been seeing
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: on TikTok everywhere. It's just like massive metal water bottle
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: with a straw. So I was like, oh, I wanted
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: to drink more water. One of my New Year's resolutions
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: more water. When I tell you, this thing was forty
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: and I don't know, I can't speak for all Stanley
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: water bottles, like not to be smirched the good name
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: of Stanley, but it leaks, so it's like for a
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: leaky water bottle, like why did I buy? It's also
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: very heavy when it's full. It just doesn't suit my needs.
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: There's not there's not a need in my day to
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: day that this water bottle that was pretty expensive as
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: water bottles go, actually fit. Another one was these um
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: weights that you can strap to your ankles and your
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: wrists and they're fine that they are indeed weights, but
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: I use them maybe twice. And I think I bought
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: them when I was feeling very aspirational, like I bought
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: them for a version of myself that I patently am not.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: If that makes sense, yep, yeah, I will say for
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: my partners, if I had to guess, for them, it
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: is water bottles and coffee mugs and I'm like, why
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: stop it? And we have so many. I'm like, you
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: don't need this many. There's no reason you're not going
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: to do this many coffees in a day that you
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: need sixteen different and we have a hole like shelf
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: of it. And if you do it again, I'm gonna
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: punch your throat. And they take up a lot of
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: room like things like that. It's like they store awkwardly,
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: and so if you don't have you don't have a
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: huge place and a lot of storage spaces like it.
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: Really it adds up. And so kind of like any
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: what you were saying earlier about the pandemic, you know,
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: I have a theory that, especially during times that are
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: like turbulent or uncertain, the pandemic would definitely fit into
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: this um. Many of us, myself very very much included,
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: really turned to online shopping for a quick serotonin boost
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: or a quick you know this is gonna feel good,
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: or like I got into this habit of enjoying the
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: feeling of kind of giving myself Christmas every day, like, oh,
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: there's gonna be when I come home, there's gonna be
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: a present waiting for me, you know from past me
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: And so it's not just my theory. I do have
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: a little bit of research to back up up. People
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: really leaned into online shopping during the pandemic. According to
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: the most recent annual Retail Trade Survey release from the Census,
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: e commerce sales increased by two hundred and forty four
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: point two billion dollars or in the first year of
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: the pandemic, rising from five hundred and seventy one point
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: two billion in nineteen to eight hundred and fifteen point
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: four billion. And people, again myself very shamefully included, uh,
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: really relied on online retailers, specifically like Amazon. Unsurprisingly, Amazon
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: stock hit a new all time high during and it's
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: only now like pretty recently starting to fall from that
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: huge booth during the beginning of the pandemic. And a
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: quick disclaimer here that, like, I just feel the need
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: to say that obviously, we know we're gonna be talking
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: about our online shopping habits, but there are a whole
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: bunch of folks who rely on online shopping for very legitimate,
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: real reasons. Folks with disabilities or chronic illnesses, you know,
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: for them, online shopping can be a lifeline being a
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: swamped parent or a caregiver who can't always, you know,
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: pop out to the store for one thing. It's also
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: a reason why somebody might really really lean on online shopping.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: I don't want to make it seem like anybody who
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: is pressing by online is just leaning into bad habits
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: that they should question. Um, So I'm not talking about
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: those folks. I'm really talking about the quick purchase of
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: things that you really don't need or maybe even really
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: don't want because an algorithm on social media told you
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: to do so. And I want to talk about why
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: the tide is maybe sort of turning on this a
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: little bit. Yeah, okay, yeah, I mean it has been
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: I have a friend who loves Target, not a sponsor,
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: but she loves like the Target app, and like she
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: will text me as if like, yeah, Christmas has come early,
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: the Target app has updated. And I feel like this
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: wasn't a thing during the pandemic, and we've talked about
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: it because it is clearly like a emotional it's something
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: she does when she stressed. And then like, I feel
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: that during the pandemic, I have seen that a lot
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: more where people are like I need something that will
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: make me feel better for a little bit. Also This
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: is a great point that you brought out, because I did.
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: I hate it when people are like judging folks for
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: I don't know, getting groceries delivered or whatever. And there's
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: a lot of impact of that. But for some people
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: that's not like laziness, right. I mean, we definitely relied
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: on it during the pandemic as something that when we
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: didn't want to go out, we didn't want to spread things.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: We were very concerned people who were even compromised, and
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: it was a resource that was necessary that really did
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: help try to maintain the spread. And it's that that
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: was the first time you really understood why this could
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: be beneficial. But yeah, that definitely could be abused. And
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: I know this is a whole differ thing, and that's
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: the whole conversation of like, people with disabilities have to
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: rely on things like this, and it is a service
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: that that should have been happening previously. Absolutely, we absolutely
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: should not be like judging or shaming people for whom
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: they really rely on this for a lifeline. And I
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: think that's one of the reasons why it's so important
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: that the people who are you know, doing the grocery delivery,
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: who are the you know workers and the staff. They
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: should be treated well, they should be compensated well, they
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: should have protections like and people with disabilities should not
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: have to rely on like private some pretty exploitative like
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: grocery delivery apps. Like we like everybody deserves better and
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: we shouldn't be judging anybody who is just trying to
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: like live their life. Um, but I do think that
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: we are in a place where people who again myself included,
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: maybe got into some bad online shopping habits without really
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: hitting pause and really thinking about whether those habits, you know,
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: maybe got us through a tough time emotionally during but
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: maybe aren't really serving us so well, or are wallets
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: so well if you're me here right right. It's kind
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: of interesting because I think we've talked about this for
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: I'm a big fan of TikTok. I can get lost
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: in it for hours and hours at a time. I
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: get that so many things and like yeah, it starts
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: to read me and I'm like, okay, stop that. Why
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: are you sending to me an ad about this? And
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: then it's not necessarily an add but it's someone that
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: I trust, or say trust uh in quotes, because it's
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: someone that I like and follow, and they'd seem like
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: good people, you never know, uh, and then they're like, oh, yeah,
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: these are my five Amazon fines and these are my
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: five Costco fines. And I'm like, yes, you are correct.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: I need those things. Have Did I know that existed? No?
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: But I absolutely need those things. And it's getting to
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: be more and more. The five Amazon stuff always gets me.
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: And I have this thing with like, there's so many
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: creators on TikTok, which I'm also ad it to. Uh
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: so I feel you on that, Sam, but like ticktockers
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: who were all about you know, like, oh, here's like,
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: here's what my really organized desk or workspace looks like.
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: Like I clearly have some kind of emotional hang up
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: around the way that work gets done in my life.
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: And so I subsequently follow a lot of creators for
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: who mets their niche, and so they're like, here's what
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: my notion looks like, here's what my dot journaling looks like,
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: Here's what my laptop or workstation looks like, and that
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: I clearly have some kind of a like hang up
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: about that internally, and so I watch a lot of
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: that and so whenever they're like, my you know, go
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: to my Amazon store front my five you know, the
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: five things that really helped me stay productive. I know
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: that I'm kind of vulnerable and prime to just click
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: by without even thinking about it because it speaks to
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: some sort of internal like the issue I have where
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I must think that, oh, the way that
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: work gets done in my life is not up to
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: par with the way that work gets done in the
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: lives of other creative people or something. And so it's
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: really I think part of it really is like knowing
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: your triggers and knowing knowing the the vulnerabilities that you
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: have that we're so likely to try to fill by
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: hitting by now or by buying a thing that we
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: really ultimately might not even need. And so you know
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: that if I had to give this this conversation like
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: a so what, it's that we should really be in
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: a headspace of asking some questions when it feels like
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: the algorithm or the app or the platform is the
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: one in control and we are passive. I think that
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: what is really important is if we switch that dynamic
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: so that we the human, the person who makes the
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: money and makes the decisions about how the money gets spent,
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: is the one in control and that we are not,
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: you know, at the behest of algorithms and influencers who
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: we don't even know and you know, apps and platforms,
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: and so in service of that, I think it kind
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: of makes sense to kind of talk about how we
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: got here, like a little bit of a look back
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: on influencing and how we got to this point. Or
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: maybe people are kind of starting to ask a few
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: questions about the role that social media influencing has on
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: our life. So if I had to ask you, what
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: do you think used to be the main app on
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: social media where a lot of influencing was taking place,
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: what would you say? Instagram? Instagram? Instagram. It's absolutely Instagram.
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: You know, back in the golden era of Instagram, it
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: looked good, it had a good layout, it was easy
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: to use, it was understandable, it was it was it
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: was a different time, right, And so I think, like
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: one it felt back then, this one, I'm gonna say,
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: like this is liketeen is when I would kind of
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: situate this. So it felt kind of clear how one
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: would get engagement. So if you were on the if
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: you were an influencer, if you were on the influencer
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: side of things, you probably had a pretty clear sense
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: of like what the algorithm was going to reward. It
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: rewarded images of faces, for instance, and so the rules
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: seemed doable. You know, post every day post natively from
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: the Instagram app as opposed to adding a picture later,
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: Like it was pretty clear like what you needed to
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: do to to do well on Instagram algorithmically speaking, I
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: think that us, as the audience who was consuming the
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: content that influencers made on Instagram, we also had a
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: pretty good sense of what to expect. You know, you
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: were going to get conventionally attractive women who were giving
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: you like life envy and making it seem like, oh well,
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: if you bought this specific item, your life could be
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: like mine, right, and like, obviously this is like a curated,
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: manufactured lie that could absolutely be harmful to people who
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: were consuming it. Um as researchers like very clear, but
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: I would argue that there was something familiar to it, right,
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: Like we understood what to expect as an audience who
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: was consuming the content of influencers. But now here there
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: are two big things that are happening that I believe
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: have really shifted this golden Instagram age and the shifted
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: how folks are maybe feeling about influencers. The first is
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: that the social media landscape is really really changing and
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: really seeing some seismic shifts. We've seen this play out
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: in a couple of ways. One, people just are not
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: using Instagram like they were in the golden era of
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: you know, a new report in the Atlantic that came
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: out last month called Everyone Is Over Instagram said that
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: Instagram is slowly and steadily losing its relevance, specifically with
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: young users, and like that's the user base that any
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: social media platform really needs to court, like young people.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: You want young people to really be using your platform
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: for to feel like really relevant, right right. And It's
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: funny because I I am not on TikTok, but I've
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: noticed that Instagram is just like videos now it's like talk,
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: which is a different thing. It's a different thing. Um,
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: but it is interesting to me. I love I'm fascinated
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: by kind of these like shifts. Why do people like, like,
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: why are people into TikTok over like Instagram? Why why
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: is that happening? Um? But yeah, I mean why why
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: is it that Instagram has lost favor? Why is it fading?
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: That's a great question. I would say one is just that, like,
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: when the rules become less transparent or just less doable,
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: I think people find it less kind of worth it
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: to post there, right, And so I think that if
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: the rules felt clear in today, it seems like every
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: month Instagram announces a new things are going to be prioritizing.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: It used to be static images, then it's going to
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: be video. You know. It used to be like if
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: you posted once a day, that was enough. Then Instagram
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: put out guidance for creators that was like, oh, you
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: need to be making four reels a day. That's a
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: lot of content. It's just not possible. And so if
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Instagram decides we're going to algorithmically reward people who follow
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: this like difficult to follow and also difficult to understand
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: and constantly changing set of guidelines, and if you don't
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: follow the we're not going to show your post to anybody,
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: even your friends, even the people who want to see
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: your posts. It just eventually starts to feel like, well,
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: what's the point, right, Like that's one of the reasons
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: why personally, like I've used Instagram least, it's because whatever
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: the guidance is they give to creators to try to
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: get more engagement on the platform. It's just too much, right,
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: Like I have at work, I don't. It's like Instagram
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: is not my job. For some people it is their job,
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: and so I can understand, you know, playing the game
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: a little bit more, but it's just not what I do.
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: I have do other things in my life. And so
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: if then I'm going to be kind of I use
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: this word very lightly, but like punished algorithmically by having
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: my content not shown to people, even people who I know,
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: even people who are my friends who I know want
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: to see that content. What is the point, Like why
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: why jump through those hoops? If that's how you're gonna
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: gonna be treated on a platform, you know, you know,
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: And I was thinking as with Instagram when we were
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: talking about yes, there's all these reels and the younger
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: people are getting frustrated. They also changed the algorithm. I know,
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: there was like a whole year long campaign of people
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: just asking can you see this post um And even
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: for our posts at stuff, Mo'm never told you we
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: are verified. We have our thirty thousand followers, we rarely
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: get more than four or five flakes because we don't
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: post but every other day. And like when you look up,
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: how do you get you know, followers or views. It's
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: literally like you said the post four things, but now
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: it's adding post this, putting it on the reel, put
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: it on the like the videos, and you have to
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: do all three of those things. So you're literally taking
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: four post times three to put it on the same
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: site and it doesn't sound like it's worth it anymore.
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: And then the suppression alone with the algorithm, why just
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: why exactly? And you have to basically be a one
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: person like studio, right because like you have to make
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: the post turn it into a real comments and it's
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: like you have a job, dude, Like you're a podcaster.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: It's like your job is not doing Instagram. And I've
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: actually worked with like, um social media managers, like professional
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: social media managers to help grow my account. And you know,
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: this was a few years ago, so I can't speak
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: to whether or this is good advice now. So don't
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: try this thinking this is this is how you grow
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: Instagram now because I really don't know. But something that
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: she did is like, oh yeah, I just spend a
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: good amount of time commenting on content of accounts that
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: are similar to you in what they post, and so
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: you know, she would spend like two hours a day
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: this being like great posts. Yeah I love this, and
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: like who has time for that? Right? Like I was
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: doing a little experiment to see if it would help,
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: and it actually did help grow my account, But like,
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: am I going to sit there and do that? Absolutely not?
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: Right Like, and so I can see why people are
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: just like, yeah, I'm not going to do that. Don't
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: need that. And I think any I think that you
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: mentioned that, Um, when you go to Instagram, now, what
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: you've kind of see is a lot of reels that
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: are really TikTok's that you saw on TikTok if you
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: have that platform, you know, a week ago, and so
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: it kind of I think separately, I think that Instagram
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: is really confused about what role they are trying to
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: play in our lives and our social media diets. I
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: don't think that they know. I think that like one
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: day it will be images, one day it'll be real.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: So it's like not clear. And it's so funny because, um,
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: someone else who is really impressed about this are the Kardashians.
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: Folks might recall that over the summer, um, Kylie Jenner
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: and Kim Kardashian both posted an image saying, make Instagram
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: Instagram again, stop trying to be TikTok. I just want
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: to see cute photos of my friends. And this is
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: really kind of not surprising to me because the Kardashians
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: are so good at being Instagram friendly or the friendly
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: for the version of Instagram that Instagram used to be, right, Like,
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: they're all beautiful, they all take beautiful pictures. They're all
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: really good at looking kind of Instagram perfect and polished.
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: TikTok takes it in a completely different skill set. You
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: kind of have to be funny or engaging or you know,
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: you have to have something that's gonna make But just
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: looking good on TikTok is not enough, Like you have
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: to bring something else. And no shade to the Kardashians,
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: that is not my skill set either, So I'm not
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: I'm not trying to put them down or anything. And
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: so what's interesting is that after the Kardashians said, like, oh,
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: go back to cute pictures of my friends, the head
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: of Instagram responded over the summer saying that Instagram they
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: just needed to focus on video and reels to survive
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: and grow as a platform. Um. But then just last week,
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: he posted that you know that was the wrong move.
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: He did a complete about face, and he said that
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: Instagram quote overfocused on video last year, and so now
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: the platform is going back to balancing the amount of
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: photos and video shown to users. Um In one example
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: that he gave, you said that Instagram will consider how
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: often a person likes some comments on photos versus videos
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: to determine which content will appear first in their feeds.
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: And so this really tells me that, like, they don't
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: know what they're doing. They're not sure of their strategy.
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: You know, it's not clear to them what they're trying
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: to be. And I think it's no wonder how people
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: are like, yeah, I'll let y'all figure it out. And
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: while you'll figure it out, I'm gonna be on TikTok
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: or or just be getting rid of social media altogether.
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: You know. I think it's kind of funny because I
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: think of this analogy. When you think of Instagram, I
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: think of the elder millennials. That's me. I don't don't
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: I don't want to hear it because I've been between
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: the xers and the millennials. I came at the right
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: of the cusp. But like elder millennials trying to be
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: cool and hip and talk to those Gen Z ears
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: who would be the TikTok goods at all. That's what's happening.
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: What we see is like Instagram trying to be really
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: cool and really relevant. It's just kind of missing the
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: mark because we are no longer at that point in life.
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: And I find it funny because that's all I can
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: think of TikTok versus Instagram. I'm trying to become TikTok,
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: and TikTok's like I don't care about you, so nothing
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: is like more. I mean, I love I love this
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: contact because I think that like gen Z younger folks,
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: I like, I love it when they come for us
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: elder millennials. Um. Sometimes they'll be like things that millennials
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: really need to stop doing on Instagram, and they all
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: I'm always like yes, drag me like like no more boomerang,
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: you can fix us, thank you, and you know the
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: other part of that. And again, I think this has
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: a lot to do with the generational changes. And again
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: I love it. Is like, yeah, Instagram really gave birth to,
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: as we said, influencers and selling us things and selling
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: us ideas and selling us things that we will never
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: be and try to what what we try to still attain,
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: which is the Kardashians. You know, they were really big
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: force uh in that, But with TikTok, it seems like
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: the younger generations that was really into it was like,
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: we're tired of celebrities. We want a chance to see
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: regular people who have a lot of good ideas and content,
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: and the TikTok is for the people. Because I know
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: there's been a lot of pushback as celebrities are not
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: jumping on TikTok, but people like stop it, this is
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: not for you. Oh my god, I could talk about
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: this for hours. This is something I find so fascinating.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: So I think because TikTok is a younger platform, they
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: just have a completely different relationship with digital life than
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: like them then millennials have. And so I absolutely agree
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: with you that, especially for younger folks who are spending
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: time on TikTok, and TikTok is that this is the
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: fastest growing social media app out there right now. I
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: think the audience is very different from the curated Instagram
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: audience and that they do want more real stuff that
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: they want authenticity, not that like fake like oh my
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: house is so messy. Authenticity, like really authenticity, and they
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: are vocal, like they will call you out. There was
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: a whole thing with um. I think it was Bethanie
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: Frankel going on TikTok and her transition to TikTok wasn't
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: very smooth, And I think part of it is because
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: like celebrities maybe are used to being able to say
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: certain things and get everybody fonding all over them on
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: Instagram or on other social media platforms, and they're not
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: finding that reception on TikTok. Like TikTok is the app
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: for like regular people to talk, it's not for celebrities
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: to like hawk their perfect lives. And there's actually an
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: influencer right now, like a big influencer, michaela Nigeria. I
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: apologize I been saying her last name wrong, but um,
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: it's in very hot water for trying to do a
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: mascara brand like sponsored content while allegedly wearing false lashes,
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: and so obviously you can't be like this, a mascara
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: is so great. Look look at the way it should
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: transform my lashes where it's like I think those are
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: freak lashes um, and so people are calling this person
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: out because that doesn't fly there, right, And so I
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: think that, like, you're exactly right, Sam, that the audience
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: that is big on TikTok is a lot more vocal,
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: a lot more savvy, and they will call you out
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: if they feel like they're being pushed something that's just
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: like like a fantasy that's not real. Maybe on on
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: Instagram you might get away with that, but not on TikTok. Well,
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: I will say the thing about TikTok is there are
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: TikTok sleuths that that is their intent, and entire content
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: is like to call out the falsehood of other content.
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: It is the rabbit holes I have gone down where
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't even know this person. I have
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: never even seen them on TikTok, but apparently they're faking
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: having a scar to get clouts. I need to reach
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: a thousand comments and spend six hours of my time
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: on this despite only having one one life to live
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: on this green nurse. And I know what you're talking about,
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: and I hate that I know what you're talking about
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: because I did the damn same thing. What has that
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: to do with it? Like it has nothing to do
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: with me. This isn't even somebody who I follow or
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: I'm invested in, like you get you're like people, the
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: evidence that people compile. It's like, I'm fascinated if if
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: anything ever happens to me. I guess I shouldn't say that,
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: but like the way that like TikTok's flues are able
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: to like investigate the nitty gritty, that really doesn't matter.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: My hats are off to them. The petty. The petty
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: is real, and if it's all in good fun, there's
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: definitely seriousness that we definitely talked about before. But the
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: pettiness is real. And when you get invested in, you
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: just like, well, well well, and you can't help but
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: be the voyor and you feel a little guilty. I
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: will say that, um, but you can't put one over
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: on them. And it continues to baffle me because as
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: as you're talking about TikTok is one of the younger ones,
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: the way that it has grown exponentially, I'm like, is
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: it going to be able to keep up with that demand? Yeah,
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: that's such a great question. I actually this is a
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: this is a a fuego take. So you know, whatever
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: is in my opinion. I think that we are going
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: to see government legislation of TikTok in This is like
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: my big tech prediction. I think that it's growing so much.
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: I think there are national security questions. I guess I'll
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: just put it that way. I think that you know,
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: there have been there is like rarer bipartisan support for
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: doing something about TikTok. It's already been banned on I
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: think federal government devices can't have TikTok on them. A
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: handful of states have banned having TikTok on state run devices,
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: and that number is growing. The universities are the same
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: at numbers growing of universities that have banned TikTok from
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: state state owned devices. I think that we are seeing
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: enough traction in government in a bipartisan way and also
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: civil society and institutions that I do think that like
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: something is going to happen or be done to combat
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: TikTok's growth, because their growth has just been like, if
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: folks want to look it up, like it is wild
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: how many users it is gaining. It's just it's just
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: like exploding. One of the things that I think about
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: TikTok becoming kind of the new place where people are
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: spending their time online on social media. Um, why that
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: might be fueling a kind of backlash against influencing is
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: that this moves a lot faster than Instagram, which fuels
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: what they call micro trends. And so if a trend
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: is something that it's in style for a little bit
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: of time, a micro trend is something that the homes
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: in style or in vogue very quickly and then burns
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: out just as quickly. Something can be iconic and very
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: popular one month and by the end of the month
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: people are talking about it being out of style. A
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: great example is like, um, this clothing brand I really
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: doubled down on and like went for a hard house
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: of sunny. They make this like very bright colored clothing
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: that really pops on social media, and I was like,
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: oh my god, and I bought like a sweater and
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: address and this and that. Maybe a month later people
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: were like, oh, would already looks so dated. And so
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: if you think about what is sort of in style,
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: how quickly it becomes sort of pass a. I think
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: that TikTok becoming a place where people spend more of
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: their digital time online is one of the reasons why
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: trends are kind of flaming out so quickly, and so
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: if you're an influencer, you know, that's just a lot
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: having to like it is exhausting to be in even
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: this in the audience, to be told you need to
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: buy a new thing over and over and over again,
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: and in in January, it's this water bottle. In February
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: that water bottles out. Now it's this water bottle. It's
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: it's no wonder that people can't really keep up with
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: that because it's too fast. That's so funny. I feel
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: like I'm the like millennial person that comes in like, oh,
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: I finally got this thing, and they're like, that's three
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: years ago, what are you doing? It does feel like
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: it moves very very quickly. And actually, an interesting implication
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: of this kind of thing is like, because I also
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: do a food podcast, is the thing like the feta pasta,
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: like feta cheese, like couldn't you couldn't find it anywhere,
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: And it was because of TikTok And then a month
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: later everyone was like, what are you talking about? But
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: for that one month nobody could find feta cheese. Yeah,
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: I see it with food. It's so interesting when it
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: happens with food because it does correlate with when you
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: go to the grocery store. It's just like not there. Um,
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: I've heard that tinned fish is like the new thing
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: right now, which if you don't want to talk about
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: like our economic climate, the fact that like tinned fish
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: that go just having our tinned fish date mate, that
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: tells me something. I'm so people are thinking about our
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: economic climate in some perhaps like less than cheery outlook,
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: which brings us to what we've been talking about. Is
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: another piece of this is like like like what I
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: was saying with myself my friends, is this anxiety of
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: this like maybe if I buy this thing, I'll feel better,
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: like maybe this will make things better. And that's not unique,
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: right absolutely. And so the second thing that we're seeing
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: that's really I think shaping all this is this kind
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: of feeling of like economic unease and uncertainty that is
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: impacting the way that people are responding to influencing. I
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: think that a lot of folks are concerned about an
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: economic downturn. We're seeing like layoffs and a lot of
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: sectors like tech and media. I don't I think people
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: are perhaps wary about spending money on things that they
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: see online and maybe doing it in a different way
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: than maybe once we're in And I think that, like
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: more importantly, I think that as we go into times
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: that are uncertain, economically uncertain, economically unstable, people don't really
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: want to open up their phone and see people living
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: the high life, right Like, it just doesn't feel good
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: to be worried about inflation, worried about food being on
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: the shelves, worried about how you're gonna make rent, if
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: you're gonna be laid off, and open your phone and
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: see an influencer trying to sell you that their life
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: is perfect and that your life can be perfect too
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: if you buy this thing that you don't need, don't
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: have money for, and don't even really want. I think
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: that people are just not feeling that vibe anymore. I
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: think there was a time where that had a time
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: and a place and it felt very familiar. I think
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: right now we're not loving it. Yeah, yeah, it just
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: feels kind of like out of touch. And and and you
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: got off the Kardashians earlier and they're big, like they've
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: even been in the news recently for like lawsuits, but
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: they were really big about this of like selling you
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: a saying it just felt like they weren't kind of
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: reading the room. I guess, like totally. I remember they
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: and it's talked about this in an episode of There
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: Are No Girls on the Internet, my own podcast Around
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: the Holidays, I remember, I think it was last year
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: or the year before, they posted their Easter spread, and
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: it was like the most opulent thing, like even for
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: Kardashian standards, the most opulent thing you've ever seen. It
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: was like life, like life size Teddy Bears, full size,
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: like five full size gumball machines, was like pink gum
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: in them for bicycles. It was like the most elaborate
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: and lavish opulent spread, even by Kardashian standards, that I
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: have seen. And the response was not like, Wow, how
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: cool for them. The response was over consume much like
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: and I think that that really shows us that we
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: are in a place where when they posted that, they
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: probably thought everyone was gonna love it, but in reality,
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: most people were like, this is a little opulent, seems
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: a little tacky, seems a lot of a little out
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: of touch for one holiday, Like at what point did
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: we start asking questions about the value of over consumption
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: and whether that's a value that is like inherently good
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: or healthy or like serving us in our lives, right,
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: And I mean Instagram and that that's kind of the thing,
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: is like you're presenting this really curated version of your life.
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: Um and then kind of at least in my case.
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: And I think there's been some sings about this, but
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: like feeling bad because you'd see other people's pictures You're like, oh,
• 43:23
  Speaker 1: their life is way better than mine. But also, and
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: I could be wrong about this, but I feel like
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: a lot of the influencers I saw on Instagram were women,
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: Like a lot of the people who were like, hey,
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: you need to buy this thing. And maybe that's just
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: an algorithm for me, but it was women, and it's
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: not just you. I think this is inherently gendered. The
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: lion share of influencers are women and girls. According to
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: a study by the influencer marketing agency Isaiah, women accounted
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: for more than of sponsorships made as influencers. But I
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: should know if that because this is America. Uh. There
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: is also an influencer pay gap. Even though there are
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: more like women make up the bulk of influencing, they're
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: still paid less than men for influencing, which is a
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: real head scratcher um. But yeah, I think it's women
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: and girls who are being sold all of this and
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: they're not. It's we're not. It's being sold products. We
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: are being sold products as a proxy for like getting
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: your life together, or like succeeding being a woman, or
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: or I think that we're being sold on the idea
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: that you can consume your way into the kind of
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: life that you want. And I think that capitalism and
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: consumption as a means of perpetuating gender roles has always
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: been a thing. And I think right now in I
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: think a lot of women are just exhausted. We have
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: been burdened with so much, we have had our rights.
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: Just like, it's not a very rosy time to be
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: a woman. I'm saying, I don't want. I feel like
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: if I go into it, I'll be all here all day.
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: But you know, I think that a lot of women
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: are just like, on top of everything else that we
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: have to shoulder, I don't have the emotional bandwidth two
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: buy into this idea that tells me that I have
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: to buy this product on Instagram to be a more
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: complete woman. You know, I think more women are calling
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: BS on this idea, especially younger women. Right, I will
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: say so immediately after the new year. The first thing,
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: and what are the first and I think you would
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: be super viral is this girl laying down in bed
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: in TikTok and saying you don't need this. Here are
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: the five products you don't need and then goes down
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: the list of all the trends and that this is
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: not you. You're not going to use this, You're not
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: gonna ever see it again, don't buy it, You're only
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: like that was the first video I saw. It was like,
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: oh what is this? And the next one was the
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: girl who was like, hey, I have a bought every
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: single expensive hair product. These are bulls and here are
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: the products you should go to go to CBS. This
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: is much better. Don't buy those expensive things. And I
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: was like, what is happening? Yeah, So that it's a
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: great example of the influencing which is all over TikTok
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: right now. So what is the influencing. Well, basically, again,
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: it's exactly what it sounds like. Rather than trying to
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: convince you to buy something, it's telling you you don't
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: actually need to buy this. So creators will be telling
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: you like, you don't need another water bottle if you're me,
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: you don't need another notebook that you know are not
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: going to use when you already have like twenty on
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: your shelf, or telling you how different TikTok or social
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: media famous products are actually not worth the money, not
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: worth it. According to the newsletter Glossy, the hashtag de
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: influencing has twenty one point four million views and has
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: increased in popularity even in just the past week. They
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: spoke to a creator who goes by L Gray or
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: Basic of Course, who pointed to the impact of the
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: economy on consumer spending and the ability or lack thereof
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: to buy based on influencer recommendations as one of the
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: reasons why de influencing is becoming so popular. L says,
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: in the last twelve months, we've seen an extreme slowdown
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: in the global economy as we enter into a recession.
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: People are starting to feel the effects and are taking
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: a closer look at their spending and consumption. Many people
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: have gotten fed up with the constant barrage of micro
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: trends and must have items, especially as they take a
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: closer look at their bank accounts and so you know,
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: I think that this creator is probably onto something that
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: you know, we started this conversation today talking about the
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: things that we and again myself very guilty of this
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: uh over consumed online in I think that the influencing
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: is a response to some of these over consumption habits
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: and a lot of us just sort of picked up
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: during the pandemic and like just kept having in our life.
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: And now we're like, wait a minute, is this actually
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: a good idea? Is it actually good that I you know,
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: we'll just click by now and get something without really
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: thinking about if I need it, if I want it,
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: like if it's something I actually truly need, Probably not,
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: I will say. I feel like and maybe it's just
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: the side of TikTok I'm on because we know it
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: is very curated, these d influencers who are trying to
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: help you save money and tell you what it is
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: and tell you what's working what's not working. It's almost
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: the way of women supporting women, or you know, the
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: marginalized supporting the marginalized. Like you're the one I know
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: this is aimed towards you. Typically women are typically you know,
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: those who are in like really harsh places. So I'm
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: going to help you and tell you not to do this.
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: And on top of that, the same conversation about the
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: gen z ears again I'm still in all of them,
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: is that they are all about calling out the bs.
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: So when they see an influencers saying this is amazing,
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: and then they start realizing this person is all about
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: the money. This person is not genuinely doing things kind
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: of like the mascara, We're going to call you out
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: and tell you don't do this again as a way
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: to protect other consumers slash other women. I love how
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: you put that. I absolutely have seen a million times
• 48:45
  Speaker 1: that women and other marginalized people telling each other the
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: truth and leveling with each other and breaking down for
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: each other. That is more powerful than a million dollar
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: pr at campaign, than a million well paid like you know,
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: pr agents working overtime. Nothing is more powerful than women
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: sharing their truths with each other. And that can like, yeah,
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: it doesn't it doesn't matter what like expensive marketing firm
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: that you've that you've contracted. Women sharing each other's truths
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: with each other will always be more powerful. Absolutely, yeah,
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: And I find it interesting because it's those kind of
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: like that same girl I was talking about who was
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: saying don't buy this, and she's now gone viral. Being honest,
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: being truthful and trying to protect others has really built
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: her audience, and she's become an influencer slash the influencer,
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: and is now getting credibility and may be able to
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: go viral enough to like start having her own outlets.
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: Whether it is who knows. I know several people from
• 49:43
  Speaker 1: TikTok as well as YouTube, but that's the whole thing.
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: Have shows, get shows, get brand deals, and get specific
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: deals that are genuinely good because they are honest, and
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: it's building them up. So it's interesting to see how
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: this the opposite of that has grown them. That makes sense.
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: It makes so much sense that I've been I think
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: it's I think it marks a shift, and I think
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: it's good. I think that, like we should question why
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: the powers that be are so quick to reward people
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: who make their entire thing about stuff that you should
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: buy over consumption. We could be instead building up honest
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: platforms and platforms that say like, well, you really aren't
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: going to use this, or you really don't need this.
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: Like I love watching on TikTok people who do closet
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: clean out and they're like, these are the top five
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: things I like remove from people's closets, or like the
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: the hop tend things people don't actually wear, because it
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: might actually help create that shift of being a little
• 50:43
  Speaker 1: bit more in tuned and intentional about what you buy.
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: And I think that's really important. I mean, like, it
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: has so many implications, not you know, not the least
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: of which is the environmental impact of Like, you know,
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: I had a little bit of a of a fast
• 50:55
  Speaker 1: fashion thing myself, like I would buy from this brand
• 50:59
  Speaker 1: she is it she in where you know, it's like
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: it's so it's so cheap, and it like it looks
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: it looks like the fancier stuff, but it's so cheap.
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: Then it's like, well, you're like, actually it is one
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: of the biggest offenders, a fast fashion that ends up,
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: you know, polluting our world. And it's like I don't
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: want to be I don't I don't want like, I
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: don't want my unexamined emotional need to translate to a
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: worst world for the next generation to come. And so
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: I really kind of saw the like need for me
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: to do a little bit of thinking and unpacking and
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: intention around my own consumption habits and what I was
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: trying to fill by buying things and the longer term
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: consequences for generations to come. I know that sounds like
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: a lot, but like you're gonna start somewhere right, No,
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: it is absolutely goes hand in hand again with the
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: new creators that the people who are getting big on
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: TikTok are those who are like, hey, you're doing these
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: things and it could be of course, this is a
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: whole different conversation about die nosing and assuming everybody's one
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: thing or another, but it does call call out to
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: be like, hey, you have this reaction which could be
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: costing you money, costing your time because of a trauma,
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: so you're focusing on the wrong thing. Like I do
• 52:12
  Speaker 1: love seeing them correlate actual action to internalized trauma or
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: maybe reasoning however you want to say it. But it
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: is encouraging to see that there's more correlations that these
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: influencers slash TikTok people are talking about out loud, so
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: you start considering the actual basis of trying consuming too
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: much or consuming way too fast, or not thinking about it.
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: It's both encouraging and kind of scary to see how
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: quickly this can flip because we really did go from
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: a generation of we have to be perfect, we have
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: to look perfect, we have to be the Kardashians, uh,
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: white girl version of what I mean by that is
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: that skinny, skinny version you you know, yeah, I know
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: what I'm talking about um too. But like coming into
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: loving your body, do things that are healthy for you,
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: do things that make you happy, do things that bring
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: me joy, and then going into and that comes to
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: having peace of mind. And this is how you do it.
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: And so it's kind of interesting to see how we
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: flip there, but we are at this cusp of like
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: it could flip again, and is it going to be
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: healthy or unhealthy? I think again, TikTok is being is
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: encouraging to me to see the creators that I'm seeing.
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: That's such a good point. And I think, you know,
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: the bottom line of this is that you cannot consume
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: yourself into feeling like a complete version of yourself to
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: feeling whole. You know, I talked earlier about how I
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: get really kind of stuck on these like people who
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: are full time creatives or full time creative professionals and
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: and the way that that work gets done in their
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: lives and how it looks so good to me. It
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: looks like they're very together, like they've got lists. They
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: look very organized and very cozy and very peaceful. And
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: that clearly that is speaking that some kind of perception
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: that I have internally that I am not enough. There's
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: something I can buy that it's gonna make me feel enough.
• 54:05
  Speaker 1: I have to just get there through self work, through growth,
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: through introspection. I I completely understand the need to like
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: just hit by now and like if I get everything
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: that this woman has in her house, maybe I'll get it,
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: but I won't. You can't consume your way into I
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: guess feeling good about what you've got, feeling good about
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: who you are, you know, feeling good at like feeling
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: it like yourself, and feeling like that's enough. There's just
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: not a product that's gonna do that. It's gonna take
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: what's gonna take work. And so I think, you know,
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: that's it's definitely easier to just buy a thing, and I,
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: boy do I keep trying, But I know I just
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: got some tease that I went viral. We won't talk
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: about that more. Oh, like this is I don't want
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: this is I'm judging because like who amongst us, right,
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: like I am, we're all works on progress. But but
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: if you're interested in tru to unwork, unpack some of this,
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: like de influence yourself first, I should say, like, I'm
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: not a professional. So if you if you are someone
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: listening and you think that you really might have a
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: true issue with like buying things and shopping that you
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: might need to talk to somebody about, you should do that.
• 55:14
  Speaker 1: Talk to professional if you feel like your issue rises
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: beyond you know what we're talking about here. But a
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: couple of tips that might help folks de influence themselves.
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: My favorite sleeper tip is that if you have an
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: iPhone or I think I think it works on the
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: injury to um using your phone in gray scale. My
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: phone is in gray scale probably of the time. You
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: can go into your accessibility settings on your iPhone and
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: change your your phone to gray scale. And I have
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: it so that the little button on the side, the
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: power button, if I hit that three times, it flips
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: from gray scale to color. So if somebody sends me
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: a picture where it's like, oh, I need to see
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: this in color to get the context, I can easily
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: you know, flip it to color, flip it back when
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: I tell you that it makes things on your phone
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: looks so much enticing and less appealing. And I can
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: absolutely feel it when I'm looking at my phone and color.
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: I can feel the little synapses and neurons going off
• 56:09
  Speaker 1: in my brain that tell me by this, click that,
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: look at that, read that, And it makes the experience
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: of using social media more boring, but in a good way.
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: I'm just I feel a lot more in control when
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: all of these bright colors that are designed literally designed
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: by people who make lots and lots of money to
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: to like, you know, fire things in your brain and
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: to get you to be as as as tuned in
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: and it's plugged in as you can. And so I'm
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: a big fan of like trying to to throw a
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: wrench in this techno hacking that messes with all of
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: our brains. So trying to put your phone in gray scale,
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: I love it. Another one is that when you feel
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: that twitch in your brain that says I need this,
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: don't click by right away right like, ask yourself, does
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: this fill a legitimate need in my life? If you're
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: Samantha's partner, is it just another vessel with which to
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: drink coffee or liquids. Do I already have a vessel
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: or several vessels that meet that need it out? And
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: then you like notice your emotions, like when you feel influenced,
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: really asked like do I feel the need to buy
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: this because it is serving an emotional need or filling
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: an emotional hole that I have? And what's that about?
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: You can really just start small, just asking isn't that interesting?
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: Be curious about the emotions that are sparked for you
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: when you're using social media. My therapist always says that
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: judgment and curiosity cannot coexist. And so rather than being like, oh,
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: you just are so bad with money, you just throw
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: money away. You just cannot stop shopping online, that's judgment.
• 57:50
  Speaker 1: And so when you're judging the way that you feel,
• 57:52
  Speaker 1: when you're judging your emotions, you can't be curious about them.
• 57:54
  Speaker 1: Curiosity is how we get to someplace better and like
• 57:57
  Speaker 1: move forward, and then lastly, learned to love what you
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: already have. You know, I spent so long chasing micro
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: trends and quick hit trends that when I look at
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: my closet there are things in there that I love
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: that I don't even really know where they are. I
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: don't even have access to them or see them because
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: my closet is so full of the stuff that I
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: bought that I didn't even really think about, And so
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: it makes it harder for me to love the things
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: that I actually do have that feel good and so
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: the things that I really do value in life, Because
• 58:26
  Speaker 1: there are plenty of things that I bought where I'm like,
• 58:28
  Speaker 1: oh that was I do not regret that choice. That
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: was a goodbye. It makes it harder to really appreciate
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: the things that are good byes and have them stand
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: out when you just buy so much crap that you
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: don't even really need right organized, because you will find
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: that thing you love that you forgot about for two.
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: If you do that, you shop your closet exactly. Yes,
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: during the pandemic, I remember there were a couple of
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: times where I was like, I really really want this thing,
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: and then I would look through my closet. I already
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: have that thing. Yeah. I can't tell you how many
• 59:02
  Speaker 1: times it's happened where I'm like, I'm like doing reruns,
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: Like I like I'm already in reruns on my closet,
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: like what is this? And then like if you're me anyway,
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: I wear like the same T shirt like for an
• 59:13
  Speaker 1: entire week. So yeah, yeah, buying new clothes just to
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: wear your uniform every day? Like what are we doing? Right? Yes? Well,
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: thank you as always Bridget for bringing this topic to us.
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: It was very informative for me. I've not heard of this.
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: This is amazing. I love it. I love it. I
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: love it. Yes. Where can the good listeners find you? Well?
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: You can always tune into my podcast on this very
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: same network. There are no girls on the internet. You
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: can follow me on Instagram at Bridget Brian d C.
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: I will not influence you. I can't promise that I
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: will never, but you know how it is, like we
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: gotta eat. No, I'm just kidding. On Twitter at Bridget
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: Murray I love it. Yes, go go check those out
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: if you haven't already listen nes it. Thank you again,
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: Bridget for coming. We love having you. Can wait to
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: have you again? Yes, yes, uh and the listeners. If
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: we would like to contact us, you can or email.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: It's definitely a mom stuff at I hurt me dot com.
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: You can find us on Twitter at moms of podcast,
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: or on Instagram and TikTok. What that stuff? Mom? Never
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: told you? Thanks as always to our super producer Christina,
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 1: Thank you and thanks to you for listening stuff Whenever
• 1:00:22
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• 1:00:24
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  Speaker 1: Aple podcast where if you listened to your favorite shows,