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iAlign #82 - Strong Feelings Do Not Mean It Matters More · The iAlign Podcast with Flint Mitchell

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: You're listening to the I Align podcast with Flint Mitchell, where I provide stories, resources, and tools for ambitious builders who are ready to gain control over procrastination, overthinking, and distraction.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: Years ago, I went through a breakup with a woman that I love dearly.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: It sucked.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: It was an extremely emotional time for me trying to balance a large amount of work, personal life struggles, and on top of it now, relationship struggles.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: One of the reasons it was so difficult was that much of the time that we spent together was fantastic.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: We smiled and laughed a lot and overall just had a really good time.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: But they were consistently becoming more and more moments of stress, seemingly out of nowhere.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: The reality was that we had different versions of what we wanted life to look like.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: In general, many of the things that we valued overlapped, but when it came to our priorities, they didn't.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: The way that we viewed the world was just substantially different.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: And that can be okay in certain relationships.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: For us, it caused a significant stress due to what eventually showed up as a deep yet underlying misalignment between what each of our imagined ideal lives looked like, which was brutal, right?
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I can't sugarcoat that.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: Where you look at someone and genuinely love who they are as a person, but also recognize that you're likely going two entirely different directions in life.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: I spent a decent amount of nights in that period of time lying on the carpet in my room, staring at the ceiling, thinking about this.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: How do I make it right?
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: Is this what compromise looks like?
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: Etc.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: Lots and lots of thoughts and lots and lots of intense emotions.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I realized when that was happening that I was spending so much time thinking about this relationship that other parts of my life were falling off track.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: My workouts were less intense and less consistent.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: My focus started to become fickle, and my work kept getting interrupted by my mind and by my heart.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: You'll probably hear this and know exactly what I'm talking about.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: The anxiety or the sadness or the embarrassment or any of the other strong emotions that tend to show up during the end of a relationship.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: Or any other anxiety-provoking experience, for that matter.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: It feels like it can take over your life, and it feels that way because it does take over your life.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it was hard for me to think about other things because I wanted to make the situation right.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: But making it right would have required her or I to dramatically change our views of the world or our visions of what we really wanted in life.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: Fortunately, during this experience, I was more prepared than I was in my past.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: I remember breakups in college and immediately after college where I was far less resilient, where my life would actually start to spiral around that anxiety-provoking event in my life.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: I would cope by wasting my time.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_00: My studies or my work would fall behind because I wasn't able to handle these intense emotions.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: Part of me also thought that because I was having these intense emotions meant that I should invest all of my time on them.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: I hear something along the lines of the following pretty often.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: Well, the emotions wouldn't be so strong if this wasn't clearly really important.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: And since it's important because of these intense emotions, it must be worth putting this level of work in to fix it.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: I get it.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: It sounds convincing, it's also wrong and irrational.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: Just because you feel strong emotions doesn't mean the thing evoking those emotions is important.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_00: For example, if a stranger came up to you on the street and just punched you in the throat for no reason at all, would you think, oh wow, that hurt a lot.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: I can barely breathe.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: This must be important.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: No, you'd hopefully think, that was fucking dumb.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: Why am I now barely able to breathe for no fucking reason at all?
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: What a prick.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: I hope he goes to jail.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: Not, wow, what an important experience.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: You might be convinced to think that this example is somehow different from a breakup with someone you love, but just because it's more comfortable to act as if an experience was worth our energy and time doesn't mean it was.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: The intensity of your emotions does not decide how worthy an experience is.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: This doesn't mean that all of a sudden that breakup that is causing a lot of pain isn't important, but it doesn't have to be important enough to derail your entire life.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: That's your choice.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: Nor does it have to be important enough to make you engage in shitty ways of handling your emotions, like scrolling your phone or YouTube or drinking or porn or whatever your vices are.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: And look, I know that this is easy to say out loud.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_00: My 20-year-old self would probably flip me off and say, You don't know what I'm feeling, it's not that easy.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: And he would be right, right?
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: The long texts and conversations and tears and the time spent spiraling over the situation and the late nights and the high stress coming out of nowhere with someone you like so much that it almost doesn't make sense.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: It isn't easy to rationalize all this.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: But if you have big goals in life that require you to take lots of consistent action, it is necessary.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: And to be honest, it's actually quite simple too.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: The reality is that whenever we are going through an intense experience, we likely have a series of stories that we are telling ourselves behind the scenes.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: These stories usually end with large, conclusive statements about our lives or about ourselves.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Examples are this would be the worst if we broke up.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: I would never find another her.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe my story just doesn't end with love.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe that's not the life I receive.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just not capable of attracting a person like her.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: I guess I'm just not lucky.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: The undesirable result ends up being a life sentence of pain and misery and sadness and loneliness from these limiting beliefs.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: But here's the key: they're only in your head.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: Just because you think or feel those things doesn't make them true.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: However, the more I thought them, the more true that they felt.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: And the more they made me sink into that beige carpet on the ground in my room, the more heavy my limbs felt and clouded my mind got.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: They felt so true after spiraling on them for so long.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_00: How could they not be true?
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: Even worse than these thoughts were the ones that were under the surface, the thoughts that I couldn't even really verbalize.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: Because there were more intense emotions that my subconscious couldn't put words to, but I knew they were negative.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: And once again, we get to that recurring theme, right?
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: Because I have intense emotions, it must mean that they are important, and that the thoughts that they invoke in me, like my lack of worthiness or love or luck, or how my future will be lonely, must be true.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: How could they not?
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: These emotions could never be so intense if they didn't signify truth, right?
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: Bullshit.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: They're fake.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, right?
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: But they're fake.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: They're imaginary.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: They're made the fuck up by you.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: They are irrational, bullshit thoughts caused by your spiraling mind, not by the evidence provided in the real world.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: Because no matter how many breakups you've had in your life, there is evidence that you aren't sentenced to a life without a partner if you want one.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: Namely, two things.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: One, you are capable of changing and growing.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: And two, there are about four and a half billion unique people on this planet of the gender that you are interested in.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: Unless you're interested in both of them, which makes you more irrational because now you have 9 billion options, right?
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: And obviously, point number two is a bit exaggerated, but you get my point.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: The reality of this world almost always disproves our irrational, concrete, negative life sentencing beliefs that show up when we have negative experiences like a breakup.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_00: And this brings me to the point of all this, which is I actually want to show you part of how I personally handled the intense negative emotions of this breakup a while back.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: It's a little vulnerable on my end, but hopefully it's helpful for you.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_00: And in order to do this, I just need you to accept the following pattern exists.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: One, something in the world triggers a thought or emotion.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_00: Two, there is a moment of time between when we experience the trigger and when we react to it.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: And then three, we then react to the trigger.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_00: Pretty simple.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: If you disagree with this pattern, you're just being argumentative.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: Get lost.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_00: Kidding, stick around.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: So this pattern manifests generally in one or two different directions.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: So there's direction A, it leads toward negative coping mechanisms and back into the spiral, or direction B, it leads toward positive behavior and away from the spiral.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: Something important of note, direction A doesn't imply that you are permanently stuck in the spiral, and direction B doesn't imply that the spiral ends immediately.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: The most important thing we can recognize here is that if we can be more conscientious of when pattern point one occurs, when the trigger occurs, then we can prepare ourselves with tools to create space in pattern point two, the space in between the trigger and reaction, in order to have a higher probability that the way that we act or react in pattern point three leads in the positive direction and not in the negative one.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: And I've already told you in this story information that helped me be more aware of these triggers.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_00: These are the emotions that I felt, right?
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_00: During this period, I recognized that many of the times I was feeling sadness or anxiety or embarrassment or frustration, I was subconsciously or consciously thinking about the relationship that was ending.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: Which means that I could use those emotions to determine when I was getting triggered to start to spiral over those irrational beliefs I brought up.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: So since I now knew that these specific emotions have a high likelihood of showing up when I'm getting triggered to think about and possibly spiral over the relationship, I now just need a tool or resource to use when that happens.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: This is where I have a specific tool that helps me reliably move through intense emotions more efficiently.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's a tool I actually support my clients with in order to alleviate emotions, just like the ones in the story, so that they can get back to their priorities in life.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_00: This isn't about healing, it's not about solving the experience, it's just about spending less time spiraling in it so we can spend more time on the things that matter in life.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_00: Because, remember, we decided that just because our emotions are strong and that this is important, it is not important enough to let the rest of our lives go to shit because of it.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: Let me be clear about one insight that usually fucks people up here.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_00: Just because you react emotionally does not mean you are treating a situation more seriously or as more important.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: If you break down in tears or throw away your entire life in order to try to solve your relationship, you are not demonstrating that this is more important to you than if you were to still take care of your priorities and dedicate intentional time trying to figure it out.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: And people hate this because it means that the time they spent spiraling wasn't necessarily a good use of it.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't, oh, but I learned a lesson.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_00: No, it was a waste of time.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_00: If we're being honest, it also didn't mean that they were right or worthy of having their opinion be more important because they were reacting more emotionally.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: We want to believe that because we are willing to feel so shitty and spend all of our days spiraling over that thing, that it means that we are trying really hard and doing our best.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_00: You have to be willing to work on it, right?
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: No, just another bullshit, irrational belief.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: If I don't spend all of my time fixing this relationship or breaking down an emotion, it means that it's not important to me.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: Nope.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: Taking care of yourself and your priorities does not mean that you don't value your partner or your relationship.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_00: I would actually say letting go of your priorities is a demonstration of the opposite, because when you started dating this person and when they fell for you, you were taking care of yourself and your priorities.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: So if you let those things go, you are showing them that the things that they liked about you aren't very important.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: Now that we have that settled and we have decided that just because I don't spiral into the depths of my psyche, spending all my energy trying to fix the relationship and feel like shit while I do so and throw away my positive routines and behaviors and priorities in life in order to prove my love, we can implement this tool.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: It's called the rational reset.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: It's a structured way to break out of spiraling thoughts and compulsive reactions.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: And it's simple.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: The basic premise is to build a quick checklist of mostly yes or no questions that alleviate the emotion when you are triggered in order to lower the emotion or the anxiety to a point where you can think and act more rationally.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: So the following is literally copy and pasted from my notes when I was going through my breakup.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: Whenever I started to feel one of those emotions showing up during my days, I would pull this out and go through it.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_00: In the majority of time, it would allow me to get back to what I was doing.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_00: It didn't mean all of a sudden I felt happy and joyful.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: It just helped me remind myself that the intense emotions I was feeling in that moment didn't need to decide how I would act.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_00: Because if I'm gonna succeed with my goals, and my goals are fucking massive, I need to be able to regulate my emotions and continue to take action regardless of them, while setting aside time to handle them in a healthy, dedicated, and intentional way.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: Not just randomly spiraling out of control because I feel bad.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: So here is my checklist along with some of the answers that I gave.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: Do any decisions need to be made right now at this exact moment?
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_00: No, obviously, it can wait a couple hours or days.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: Does this pain prevent me from living my life, or does it just make it uncomfortable to do so?
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: No, it's just uncomfortable, but it doesn't prevent me from living my life.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: Does this thought need to have a conclusion right now?
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_00: No, and it likely won't, anyways.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_00: It can wait a bit.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: Is life going to end if I have an issue that I'm curious and or stressed about with her, but don't immediately get the answer to?
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_00: Of course not, right?
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like I've had plenty of moments in my life where I didn't get answers immediately and I continue to live on.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_00: Next, can I still have a loving wife and family even if this continues for another year and then doesn't work out?
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah, I mean, of course.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_00: It might not be optimal, it might not be desirable, but it doesn't prevent me from having that in my future.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: Am I locked into a situation or commitment that prevents me from doing things that I want?
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: Not everything that I want, but at least some things that I want.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, no, I'm obviously not contractually locked into anything that prevents me from doing some things that I like in my life.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: Does dating for another several months and doing my best to just have fun and see what happens prevent me from having a fun, fulfilling life and from pursuing the travel and adventure and business that I want to in the future?
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: No, I mean it might be uncomfortable right now, but it doesn't prevent me from continuing to build the life that I want.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: Have I made a long-term commitment that requires this relationship to succeed?
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: Only the commitment to continue being respectful and honest and putting in effort where I can, right?
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: If I were to spend all day trying to make things right and thinking about and taking actions to help the situation, would it guarantee her happiness?
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: Are her emotions under my control?
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: Of course not, right?
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_00: I can't guarantee any result in life.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_00: I can only influence it.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm not responsible for anyone's emotions, nor can I control anyone's emotions, right?
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: Nothing I do here can guarantee that another person, let alone her, feels a specific way.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's just not reality.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: Even if this relationship ended and I was deeply sad about it, could I stand that emotion, or would it be absolutely unbearable?
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I've been sad before.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: I could handle it.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: It would be painful, sure, but bearable?
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_00: Does the result of this relationship define who I am as a person?
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: No, I don't think so.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_00: Only my actions and their alignment with my values determines who I am, not how others view me or the result of my relationship.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: If this were to end and my life went on, even if it wasn't desirable, would this likely affect my life in a year or 10 years down the future?
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_00: No, I mean it would alter the direction a little bit, but I would continue to live on and have a happy life, right?
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: Even if this moment didn't go in a happy way.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_00: And just like that, the emotion surrounding each trigger that came up during this breakup would alleviate a little bit.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: It wouldn't necessarily go away, but it would allow me to think something more rational.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: Like, okay, yeah, I'm not feeling super happy right now, but could I continue to get my work done instead of focusing on this?
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean I could.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I won't be 100% as productive as usual, but I can still do a few things.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_00: Or how about do I really need to scroll my phone right now?
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: Wouldn't that just be me avoiding the discomfort I'm feeling that I just reminded myself I'm completely capable of handling?
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I guess I could go do something better with my time or a little bit more healthy, right?
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: That's it.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: That's all we want.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: You might think, wow, you did that every time the emotions came up.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_00: Isn't that a waste of time on its own, right?
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I did, and no, it was not.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_00: By spending 60 to 90 seconds going through this checklist, even up to seven or eight times during the peak days of the emotions.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_00: Might sound like a lot.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_00: I likely avoided losing hours or even days or weeks spent to scrolling my phone, YouTube, spiraling, all that kind of stuff.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_00: And as I practiced this, I went through this heavy period of time and continued to maintain momentum with my priorities.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_00: It was a little bit less, but it was still clear momentum.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't fall off track.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_00: I continued to work out and take care of myself.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't perfect, but I continued to make good progress.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I didn't maintain the lowest weight that I needed, but my peak weight during that period wasn't that high.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_00: There were no spirals out of control or complete stops in my life.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't the happiest, jolliest period of time where I was skipping and frolicking and singing around, right?
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_00: There were plenty of nights where I went to sleep legitimately sad.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_00: Just sad.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_00: But I went to sleep a bit sad or uncomfortable while still having made progress toward my personal goals and having taken care of myself.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_00: My weight didn't fluctuate out of control.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_00: My clients didn't stop hearing from me.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_00: And we did break up, and it was sad, and I was sad, just transparently, but I continued to act the entire time in a way that made me proud.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_00: I spoke with as much honesty and compassion as I could, and I did my best, right?
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't perfect, and that was okay, right?
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_00: But best of all, my life didn't stop because something difficult was going on in it.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_00: Because at the end of the day, you only get a good 80 or 90 years on this planet.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_00: And if an event causes you to spiral out of control and lose track of all your priorities every other year or every year, you might spend a good half or three-fourths of that time of your life you are so privileged to have off track.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_00: That's just the brutal truth.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_00: Things will continue to happen in my life that will cause me anxiety and grief and sadness and embarrassment and frustration.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_00: It is my responsibility to support myself to continue to act in a way that would make me proud regardless.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_00: Meaning my emotions cannot dictate my decisions or my actions.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_00: The tools and reframes mentioned in this story are exactly the type of resources that can help you make sure that your values are what determine your actions, not your emotions.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_00: Just like they've helped me.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_00: Peace.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you enjoyed that episode.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you've been told your entire life that you're smart and you have potential, but you continue to see yourself not do what you said you would do again and again, and it's made you stop trusting in yourself or that you will ever achieve that potential, I want to help you.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: Together, you and I will implement a core value-based system that will help you become decisive and focused.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to feel the relief from the weight on your shoulders because of the decreased noise in your head.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_00: Strength each morning because you trust yourself to turn lost avoidant hours of your life into forward progress.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: Peace, when you no longer have to hide how you actually spend your time.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_00: And finally, pride in yourself when you close your eyes every night before you go to sleep.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_00: If that's of interest to you, click the first link in the show notes, fill out the 30 second application, and grab a time on my calendar.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: Spots are obviously limited because of my time and availability, but if they fill up and you're a good fit, I'll make sure you get on the wait list.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: I look forward to speaking with you.