Latest / The Imperfect Impulse w/Bree O'Connor / S 3 Ep 6 The Magic Space Between the Seconds

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S 3 Ep 6 The Magic Space Between the Seconds · The Imperfect Impulse w/Bree O'Connor

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Imperfect Impulse with Bree O'Connor.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Bree O'Connor.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: It is a beautiful rainy Thursday morning.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: I got my windows open.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I am just enjoying the non-digital rain outside my window.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I do have a lot of calming apps.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the 21st century.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: As you've probably expected by now, I have been thinking a lot about good rooms.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: And...
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: I want to cover at least one more topic today before next week
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: because next week we are dropping our third and final Good Dialogue episode
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: which is my conversation with playwright Nikki Hatsidis.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: I am excited for next week's episode because we're going to be talking about setting
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: the sky on fire.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: Which is a beautiful play that she wrote about the women who were at Los Alamos
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: during the Manhattan Project.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: Another interesting look at women in history and it takes place on the night of
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: the Trinity Test.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: It's a wonderful play that is chock full of women and women's perspectives.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm really excited to share that conversation with all of you.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: So stay tuned.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_00: That's dropping next week.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: And hopefully we'll get to tell you a little bit more about when the audio version
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: of Setting the Sky on Fire is going to be available for you to listen to.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_00: So this week I wanted to talk about leadership in good spaces.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: I want to talk about your sense of internal pacing as a leader.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: And what do I mean by that?
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: Oftentimes when we are in a high pressure situation we have a limited amount of time
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: and resources and energy and that is absolutely true
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: in every rehearsal space I've ever been in but in particular in
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: the low budget indie space we really don't have a lot to go on.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: I've had to put up full productions in two and a half weeks I've even done
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: a full evening of immersive entertainment which had two days of rehearsal
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: and four days total to build out a space.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: So we can work in very high pressure situations.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: We work long hours and a lot of times that sense of the clock can keep us a bit on edge.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: So something that I have experienced and it may sound a little mystical,
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_00: the magic space between the seconds.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: It is all perception.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: It's all state of mind.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: Some people will probably just call it flow.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: And flow is a magical state that I think we are all searching for.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: We can't just suddenly decide to be in flow.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: So how do we access this space where time stretches out
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: and we can achieve some clarity of thought in stressful situations or
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: in urgent situations?
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: It isn't just about pausing to take a second.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: Because you can pause all you want, the clock is still ticking.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: But sometimes we can reach this magical hang time.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't necessarily want to equate it with something negative,
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: but it is akin to that moment when you're about to have a catastrophic accident
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: and everything slows down and you feel that the next events are inevitable
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: and you're just floating through it.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: But you're floating through it with this new sense of awareness
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: and everything is sharper and More heightened.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: I've experienced that in the heat of a tech session that's gone on a little too long.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: Or I've definitely had that sensation,
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: which weirdly enough,
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_00: we have to remember that as opposed to an accidental situation where we're hurtling
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: toward another car and that car is hurtling toward our car,
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: like there's very little that you can do that will change the situation.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you may be able to make a small shift that may be Lessens the impact,
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_00: but the impact is going to happen.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: However,
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: what we need to remember when we're in a rehearsal situation,
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: that all of that space is in our control.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_00: I know that's a strange thing to say because time is moving forward.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_00: And the costumes are missing or the lead actor has come down with flu.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: Like all of these things do happen.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, that's the show must go on.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: That's the myth behind the theater is that somehow these problems get solved in some way.
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  SPEAKER_00: Are those solutions always perfect?
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: No, but that's kind of the nature of the beast.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's what we sign up for.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: So I think step one in finding a state of flow or the magic space between
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: the seconds is to accept the parameters that you are working with.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: Is to accept that this is my crew, these are the circumstances, these are my resources.
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  SPEAKER_00: And there is always some kind of solution inside
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  SPEAKER_00: that little sphere.
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  SPEAKER_00: And if you can accept and even embrace that set of circumstances,
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  SPEAKER_00: it does a lot to cool your inner fire.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_00: Now, okay, what does that mean?
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: When we find ourselves in stressful situations,
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  SPEAKER_00: certain physiological things actually happen to us.
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  SPEAKER_00: Our blood pressure goes up,
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  SPEAKER_00: our heart races,
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  SPEAKER_00: our respiration increases, and it all signals to our body that we are in danger.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: And the trick here is Is to recognize that these physiological things are happening
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_00: to you and they are real.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: So your goal is not to suppress them.
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  SPEAKER_00: Your goal is to redirect them toward more productive ends.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, great.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_00: What does that mean?
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: That sometimes that little pause that you take To think or manage
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: the situation can be better spent taking deep breaths,
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  SPEAKER_00: not thinking about the problem,
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  SPEAKER_00: monitoring your heart rate,
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  SPEAKER_00: and making sure that your deep cleansing breaths are taking your heart rate down.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: And you will find that you are able to attack whatever situation with
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: a little bit more clarity and kindness.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_00: And when your cast and crew see that you're able to do that, their systems will mimic yours.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_00: You will be bringing down the tension level throughout the rehearsal space.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you're like me,
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: Doing those calming techniques just
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_00: for your own benefit may be not enough incentive.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: But if you can think about your body as the vessel that holds the space
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_00: for everyone else, then you might be kinder to that vessel.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_00: You might be able to find the motivation In which to give yourself that moment
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_00: of calm, that moment of release and clarity.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: And we have to remember something.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: Although in any of these endeavors there is money on the line,
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: reputations,
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  SPEAKER_00: you know, there are all of these things that we consider stakes in these moments.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: However,
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: we need to remove ourselves from the mindset that any project is
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: the most important thing in the world and that this has to be awesome
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_00: or else you'll never work again.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: Because whether you work again or not as an artist is really up to you.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_00: The level you work at,
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: or the amount of money,
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: or the kinds of commissions,
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: or whatever, that is a little bit less out of your hands, but you can make art.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: This isn't the end-all, be-all of everything.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_00: This is not transplant surgery.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: No one's life is on the line here.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: So lower the stakes for yourself and make room for imperfection, for mistakes.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_00: If you can accept that and bring down the temperature in the room,
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_00: you will be surprised just how far...
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: Your cast and crew will come and spread their wings and do amazing things.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: There's a tremendous amount of freefall that is required in every one of these spaces.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_00: As the leader, you gotta do it first.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: You've gotta be out there ready to show how willing you are to...
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_00: Risk and to trust.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: If you build a room that is full of motivated,
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  SPEAKER_00: empathic,
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  SPEAKER_00: and intrepid artists,
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  SPEAKER_00: not only will they catch you,
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_00: but they're going to take the work even higher than you expected.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: But you have to leap first.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: You've got to find that space where you're okay.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_00: And everyone's okay.
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  SPEAKER_00: Regardless of the circumstances around you.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: And that doesn't come by ignoring the circumstances.
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  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't come by pretending that the problems don't exist.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_00: Or faking anything.
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  SPEAKER_00: You can be completely honest about how screwed things up are.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: And still receive that kind of blessed support.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: But you have to build the room and you have to set the example.
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  SPEAKER_00: And you need to find space.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: You need to moderate your internal pacing.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: And when you feel your body start to perceive this moment as a threat...
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  SPEAKER_00: Your first responsibility is to calm your body and to let your body know
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  SPEAKER_00: that there is really nothing terrible that's going to happen to you.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: So what if you have a bad performance?
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: So what if you have a less than stellar opening?
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_00: So what if someone drops their line?
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_00: So what?
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: You just trust.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_00: You need to build that space with your team where you catch each other,
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  SPEAKER_00: where it is all for one and one for all.
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  SPEAKER_00: And that starts with you.
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  SPEAKER_00: Every time.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: Every time.
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  SPEAKER_00: If your cast and crew know that you will go to the lengths for them, they will go for you.
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  SPEAKER_00: It is reciprocal.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: If it is not reciprocal,
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  SPEAKER_00: you're going to find yourself embroiled in nasty feelings and backbiting and,
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: you know, all kinds of...
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, we all have experienced these icky spaces where singular interests
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_00: and intrigues poison the space.
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  SPEAKER_00: As the leader,
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  SPEAKER_00: it is your job to both build the space with people that you can trust,
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_00: with people who have the right intentions to Don't worry about their followings
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: or their star power or anything like that.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I know in more commercial pursuits that that is a concern.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: That is not a space I ever want to work in.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yuck.
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  SPEAKER_00: I would much rather work with people I know who Support the culture of the room
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_00: that I'm trying to build.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: The argument here is for more repertory or company model
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  SPEAKER_00: where you have trusted collaborators that you work with again and again.
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  SPEAKER_00: However, do not be afraid.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: To invite people into that space because you should be constantly moving new people
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: through the space because they can bring in something so much more interesting
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: and alive and the ways that the group has to shift to make room
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: for those new voices is what keeps everybody on their toes
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_00: and makes things unpredictable and lovely and But the great part
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: about having core people that you can trust is that they help maintain the culture
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: of the space so that the new people will come in and they will imitate
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: the behavior around them.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: They will adopt the culture of the group.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: And as a leader...
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: The culture you build matters and that starts with your own nervous system.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: It starts with how you care for yourself as an artist and how you view the space
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_00: and your intentions for this space.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: We all have dreams of building this amazing thing that is gonna rock everybody's world.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta let that go.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: I keep coming back to this song Old fogies like me might remember the 38 special song.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: It's a song about love and it's great advice.
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  SPEAKER_00: And the lyrics are hold on loosely, but don't let go.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: If you cling too tightly, you're going to lose control.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: And that is amazing advice for collaborative work.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, a relationship is collaborative.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you know,
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_00: a love relationship is ultimately collaborative because you're building the space
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: between the two of you.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_00: And the same is true when building an ensemble is that not only are you choosing
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: the people in that space with some consciousness,
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_00: you're building the space and connections between each other.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_00: You don't do that by suggesting that there is a strict code of behavior There is
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: a delicate dance of back and forth that begins with what you bring to the space and
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_00: that is especially true for leaders but it's also true for every cast member
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_00: and every crew member.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_00: What are you bringing to the table?
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_00: How are you helping to create the space between yourself and all of your colleagues?
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: A key part of that Is checking in on your internal pacing?
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_00: Are you revved up?
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_00: Is it excitement?
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_00: Because excitement is fun to bring into the space.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: But if you're bringing in anxiety to the space,
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_00: that brings a fog to the space between you and everyone else.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_00: And they're going to have to account for it.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's the thing that we don't realize is that when we bring bad feelings
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_00: about ourselves or bring in a difficult personal situation where it's a relationship
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: with our bodies or our voice or whatever,
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_00: That whatever you're bringing into this space,
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_00: everyone is going to have to adjust to accept and
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_00: or counter whatever it is you're bringing.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_00: So you need to be conscious, like as a leader, but also as a colleague and collaborator.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: Check your internal pacing.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: Check your nervous system.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_00: Do what you can to take care of it and take care of yourself because that's
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_00: the first step to taking care of everyone else.
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_00: If you are operating at your highest,
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: then it makes the connections between you and everyone else that much stronger.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't mean that you have to live a conflict-free life or that you have
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_00: to be perfect all the time.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_00: It means that you are aware of how your body is responding to things.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: You're aware of your triggers.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_00: You're aware of how you are showing up and what you're giving to everyone.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_00: And you are open and ready.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_00: Appreciative of the things that others bring to the space and as a leader in
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_00: that space your job is to be attuned to everyone in it.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: If there is something that is negative or difficult or It doesn't mean we ignore it.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't mean that we suppress it.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't mean that we disallow its existence because we are human beings and things happen.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: Our lives are full of complexity.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_00: It means that we make conscious decisions about whether or not that is going
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_00: to infiltrate or be present in the process.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_00: If you are having constant issues with your spouse,
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_00: that conflict that I am feeling outside of the rehearsal space,
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_00: I can leave it in the hallway because it will wait for me.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: It will be there when I'm done with rehearsal.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_00: But for rehearsal,
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to need to take the utmost care of myself and of others and work to build
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: the space between us with a web of trust and care.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_00: And then my regular life is my regular life.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_00: It picks up when I walk out the door.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_00: As a leader, you have to do that times 10.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: That sounds like a lot of work, and it is, but it's also one of the great joys of the work.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: I hope this wasn't too obtuse,
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: but it is a great concern of mine is that we take down the temperature
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: and have some perspective on Even though this is very,
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: very important to us,
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_00: in the grand scheme of things,
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_00: in this four to six week period where we're doing X, Y, and Z,
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_00: or even if you're lucky enough to be on a long term project,
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_00: where you're contracted for several months,
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_00: that you are consciously choosing what you are bringing into the space and
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_00: And you are aware of how things are acting upon you.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_00: And you endeavor to enjoy this place where story is king and it's really not a big deal.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's not.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I mean that in the best way.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_00: You're going to go through this period of time in your life and it will be over.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_00: So don't miss it.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_00: Don't miss it worrying about being perfect or making big career moves.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, yes, that is part of the calculus for everyone, but don't let that be the space.
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_00: Don't let that be the process of self-aggrandizement and self-advancement because
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_00: that ignores your colleagues.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: It ignores your ensemble.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: I hope that was understandable.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: I also hope I wasn't ridiculously repetitive.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, remember,
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: next week we are dropping part three of our Good Dialogue series
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: with Nikki Hatsitis.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_00: And if you haven't seen parts one and two,
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_00: you can go back into our feed and find parts one and two of Good Dialogue inside
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: The Imperfect Impulse series.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_00: Have a good listen.
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_00: Nikki is a very smart playwright and you deserve to hear from her.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_00: That's it for today and we'll talk to you again soon on the Imperfect Impulse.