Latest / DA CREW Podcast / HEALING VOICES, NAVIGATING THROUGH GRIEF 3-30-25

Transcript

HEALING VOICES, NAVIGATING THROUGH GRIEF 3-30-25 · DA CREW Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Think well.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: Welcome, Welcome, Welcome. I want to welcome you guys to
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: Healing Voices Navigating through Grief. This is our inaugural podcasts show, y'all.
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: This is our first show of this season. This is
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: our initial show, y'all, and I am excited because, as
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: you know, I have battled with grief, and tonight you're
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: going to meet some of my co hosts. That's going
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: to be a part of the show that they too
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: have had struggles with grief, and that is a part
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: of our life because we all know that we're eventually
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: going to transition. That this is not our resting place,
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: that this is not our home, but we want to
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: be able to provide a safe place where you can
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: feel comfortable, where you can heal through your journey. We are,
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: we are still healing, and we want to be able
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: to heal while helping you heal on this journey. So
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: hopefully throughout this season, we're going to be on every
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: fifth Sunday. So y'all, of course know that there is
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: not a fifth Sunday every month, So we will be
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: on three more shows after this show tonight, we will
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: be on three more shows, so you get an opportunity
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: to really connect with us. Tonight, you're going to get
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: an opportunity to meet some of the amazing hosts that's
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: going to be a part of this podcast. Shania is
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: not gonna be with us tonight. She traveled to Washington,
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: d C. On this weekend to be a part of
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: an award ceremony, so she will not be with us
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: on tonight. She will be back on the next show.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: But I want to encourage you guys to share this
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: out with someone because you never know what the next
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: person may be in need of. I'm gonna bring up
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: my co host and y'all know how we are. We
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: are some spiritual individuals over here on the Crew podcast,
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: So y'all know, of course we're gonna start our show
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: off with a prayer because we always want to keep
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: God in the mist because that's just who we are.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: So I'm gonna bring up these amazing co hosts. Y'all.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: I say co hosts, but y'all know they gonna be
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: the host because y'all know me. But anyway, I'm gonna
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: bring them on up so we can go ahead and
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: kick off this show first. I want a possible, apossible.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: We still can't see, but are you in the building.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: You mute it.
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: Yes, I am in the building. I can here.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: So we always it's just something that we do on
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: the Crew podcast. We just believe in referencing our Creator.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: So if you would start us off in prayer, that
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: would be great.
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: Awesome, Father God, in the name of Jesus, Lord God,
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: we come tonight first of all saying thank you, Lord,
• 5:38
  Speaker 3: We thank you for this time. God, We thank you
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: for this opportunity. Lord. We come tonight God, giving you
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: glory and honoring you for being who you are. Father.
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: We want to thank you for allowing us to come
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: together tonight, Lord God, to be able, Lord to navigate
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: through grief Father's healing voices. Father, we ask right now
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: in the name of Jesus God, that you, Lord God,
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: will season our words with grace. Father, that you will
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: allow us to have clarity of thought and of speech. Father,
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: and as we go forth on this journey, Lord, that
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: we will be able to say something that will help
• 6:14
  Speaker 3: someone else along their way. Father. We know that grief
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: is a process that we all are going to experience
• 6:20
  Speaker 3: at some point in our life. Father, but we know
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: that you are our lead. You are our God. Father,
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: you draw nigh to those of a broken heart and
• 6:28
  Speaker 3: a contrite spirit. So Father, we thank you now, Lord
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: for looking down upon us, Lord helping us through whatever
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: stage that we may be in tonight. Lord, as we
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: journey through this life, Lord God, and through this experience
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: of grief, we pray right now in the name of Jesus, God,
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: that you will keep your hand upon us. Lead God,
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: and protect us in the ways in which we should go.
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: And Father, deliver us whole and heal. In the mighty
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: name of Jesus. We pray, Amen, Amen, and.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: Amen, Amen, Amen, And I thank God for that prayer.
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: On tonight before we get started, I do want to
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: read a disclaimer. Just want to make sure that everyone
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: is aware of what this show is about and what's
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: going to take place on tonight. So I want to
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: read a disclaimer that is posted. And it's also I
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: think it's strolling along the bottom of the screen, but
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: I want to read it real quick. So it says
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: them davas of the Airways Listeners Advisory. We at The
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: Crew podcast are committed to creating a safe and supportive
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: space for all our listeners. Please be aware that some
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: episodes may discuss sensitive topics, including grief, which could be
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: triggering for some individuals. Trigger warning. If at any time
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: you feel uncomfortable, we encourage you to take a break
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: and return when you're ready. Your well being is our priority.
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: The stories shared on our podcast are personal experiences. We
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: are non professionals sharing to heal and to help others heal.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: For professional advice or support, please consult a qualified counselor
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: or therapist. Thank you for joining us on this journey.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: Stay safe and take care. Now I want you to
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: sit back, relax, and go ahead and grab your brablege,
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: whatever that choice of privilege is, because you're gonna get
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: an opportunity tonight to meet the host. You're gonna get
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: the opportunity to meet these individuals that you see on
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: the screen. They're gonna share just a little bit about them.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: We're not gonna jump, we're not gonna get into our grief,
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: but we're gonna tell you a little bit about us,
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: and then we're gonna talk about what you can expect
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: from the show, what we want to bring to this show,
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: and what we hope you guys will be able to
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: take away. So I want to start with Trevida, if
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: you would please introduce yourself.
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: All right, good evening everyone. My name's Trevita Harris and
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: I am one of the hosts for the Crew podcast network.
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: My podcast is Believe in the Journey, because we all
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: have a journey. We all have things that we go
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: through that get us to where we are, which leads
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: us to the purpose in which God has created us.
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: Thank man. Next, we have a doctor Kimberly.
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: Doctor Kimberly, Good evening everyone. I am apostle, Doctor Kimberly Thomas.
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: I am an apostle of the Lord's Church as well
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: as one who has journeyed, and I believe in being
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: restored to wholeness. So on this journey, as we navig
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: gate through grief with our healing voices, I am look
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: forward to being able to not only be empowered by
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: the stories that will be shared, but also to be
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: able to empower and encourage others along their journey.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: Amen. Amen. And then we have Scheanette.
• 10:21
  Speaker 4: Good evening everyone. My name is Janette Johnson and I
• 10:23
  Speaker 4: am one of the hosts over here on the Crew
• 10:26
  Speaker 4: podcast My My podcast it's called Let's Talk About It,
• 10:34
  Speaker 4: where we talk about injustice over sentenced, over sentencing wrong conviction.
• 10:42
  Speaker 4: We just talk about anything over there.
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: Amen, Amen, and miss Danielle him.
• 10:51
  Speaker 5: My name is Danielle and I am the owner of
• 10:54
  Speaker 5: Hope's Legacy Grief Support. I'm also a grief coach and
• 10:57
  Speaker 5: I just was reminded of how many times in the
• 10:59
  Speaker 5: Bible reminds us that we don't have to do life alone.
• 11:02
  Speaker 5: He doesn't want us to be heard and broken. We
• 11:05
  Speaker 5: might grieve, things do happen, but he sends so many
• 11:08
  Speaker 5: amazing people to be a blessing to us, and he
• 11:10
  Speaker 5: takes us to things we can bless be a blessing
• 11:12
  Speaker 5: to others. So thank you.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: Amen, Amen, And we're gonna talk about those five stages
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: of grief. And like I said, we're gonna do an
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: overview on tonight. So for those that are wondering who
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: I am, I am the visionary of the Crew podcast.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: I am a lady that were many hats, but the
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: main hat that I wear is I want to be
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: the change that I desire to see walking in God's
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: purpose for that that He's placed me here to do
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: for that time that I am here. Because we all
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: know that we have a beginning date and there's also
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: going to be an end date, But it's that dash
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: that I want to say, well done, my good and
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: faithful servant. So when I stay before him, I hope
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: that the things that I have done in this realm
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: was the things that he would have me to do.
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: So I try to leave by example. I try to
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: be the change that I desire to see in this world.
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: So those things that I think should be taking place
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: in this world, those are the things that I try
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: to make come forth. Because He's given us all gifts
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: and talents, and He's deposited in us Genesis two and seven,
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: that breath of life. So hey, I'm just here to
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: be a vessel and just want to provide a space
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: for other people. Grief is something that I have journeyed,
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: and I want people to know that it is a
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: journey that we all we make. Some may not have
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: experienced it yet. And it's not always the loss of
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: a loved one, because sometime we get caught up on
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: losing loved ones. But it can be the loss of
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: a limb. I have a mother that her son he
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: lost his sight, and she grieved because he was an
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: adult that lost his sight and she had to watch
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: her son go through that process and she grieved. So
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: it's a lot of different ways that we can grieve,
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: and there's different stages and we're gonna talk about those stages.
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: And the most important thing that I want people to
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: know is that it's okay. It's okay to feel how
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: you feel, but how you feel, don't stay there too long.
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: Know that you can lay it down and come back
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: to it later, but just don't stay there too long.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: Keep going and all that you do. So we're gonna
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: go around again, y'all, and it's gonna be a constant
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: go around. So y'all gonna be hearing from us, back
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: and forth, back and forth in any time. Any of
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: y'all want to jump in, y'all, y'all can jump in
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: at any time. I want to talk about the different
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: stages because a lot of people don't know that there
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: are different stages, and they don't know and understand why
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: they're going through these different stages. So we want to
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: talk about the different stages. Do anybody, can anybody tell
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: me all of this? Because remember, y'all, we're not professionals,
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: except for miss Daniella, she is a grief coach. We're
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: just coming from experience. So do anybody besides Danieller, No,
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: all five of the grief stages. MM. I didn't think
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: about apostle too, because she may know too because of
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: her her ministry back down and know she does a
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: lot of Christian counseling too. So yeah, m hm, anybody,
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: cheat sheet is scrolling.
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: You have anger, you have denial, you have bargaining, you
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: have acceptance, and then I can't think of the other one.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: But I think that's the four, and I know I'm
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: missing one.
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: Let me see denial, I think anger, bargaining, denial, anger, acceptance,
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: accepting is the last one. If if we so called
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: have an order, it would be five. What is number four?
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: Which is there's something before between depression? Who said that? Yeah,
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: I knew, yep. So denia is supposedly the first stage,
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: and then the second stage is anger, and then the
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: third stage is bargaining, and then the fourth stage it
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: is depression, and then acceptance is the last stage if
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: there is an order, because we can experience them in
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: different order, so who who who wants to share their
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: perspective and what they have seen, not your experience, but
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: what you have seen in in the realms of these
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: different stages. So I'm gonna we're gonna start off with denial.
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: So what what what can we talk about for denial?
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: What can we share about denial without sharing our personal stories?
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: I would say with denial, you don't want to believe
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: that the person is no longer with us. You know,
• 16:51
  Speaker 3: It's like you're hoping for a phone call, You're hoping
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: to see them again, and you don't want to actually
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: say they're not here anymore. So I think that's where
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: the denial comes in, is a constant reminder that this
• 17:08
  Speaker 3: cannot be true, this is not happening. This person did
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: not leave me in any capacity. They're going to call me,
• 17:15
  Speaker 3: they're going to show up, they're going to I'm gonna
• 17:18
  Speaker 3: hear from them again, you know that. I think that's
• 17:21
  Speaker 3: where the denial comes in.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: That's like you hear people say that they make up
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: in their mind that this person is going on a
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: vacation or something. Mm hmm hmm.
• 17:34
  Speaker 4: Are you just like dreaming like it's a dream, like
• 17:38
  Speaker 4: you're stuck in a dream and you just want to
• 17:40
  Speaker 4: wake up from that nightmare Twilight song?
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: Yes, and you just don't want to believe right, So
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: doing that and Miss Danielle and you. You can, you can,
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: you can jump in. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: I'm not gonna hold you because you you may have
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: more experiencing us. We want you to share. But I
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: was just trying to get some of the non professionals
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: like myself.
• 18:11
  Speaker 5: No, it's okay, you all are doing a great job.
• 18:13
  Speaker 5: I'm like, those are really great answers. You know, it
• 18:16
  Speaker 5: just reminds you that a lot of times, going through
• 18:18
  Speaker 5: these stages you agree for not linear. So for example,
• 18:20
  Speaker 5: you can be accepting what's going on at one moment
• 18:22
  Speaker 5: and then be pushed right back into denial. And I
• 18:26
  Speaker 5: know personally that it's like with denial. People can show
• 18:29
  Speaker 5: you a picture, you can see the newspaper article, you
• 18:32
  Speaker 5: could be at the funeral, you could have written out
• 18:34
  Speaker 5: in paper. But sometimes your head, in your heart don't
• 18:36
  Speaker 5: believe it. So sometimes it's one of the stages that
• 18:38
  Speaker 5: hit really hard because you're just like, no, this can't
• 18:41
  Speaker 5: be real. You talk yourself out of it. Maybe it's
• 18:43
  Speaker 5: a dream. Maybe in two days a month, I'll feel better,
• 18:47
  Speaker 5: or whatever you might tell yourself. But denial, it's rough.
• 18:50
  Speaker 5: It's hard.
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yes it is.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: Apossible. Do you have anything for denial.
• 19:03
  Speaker 3: I agree with what the other co hosts have said
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: tonight regarding denial, because this is one of the places
• 19:12
  Speaker 3: where it's very difficult when it's fresh. When grief is
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: very fresh, you know, we go through that stage of
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: denial that we're thinking that something is going to miraculously
• 19:26
  Speaker 3: happen and this person is going to reappear, or as
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: it's been stated, they're going to you know, there's going
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: to be a phone call, or maybe the broker's wrong,
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: maybe that's not what really happened, Maybe it with someone else,
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: you know, so there are this is a moment that
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: we are very vulnerable in the early on process of grief.
• 19:50
  Speaker 3: Once a person has transitioned, it is very difficult for
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: us to really accept the things that have that has
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: transpired in we go through this place of being in
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: denial and hoping, wishing and praying that there's going to
• 20:07
  Speaker 3: be a different outcome.
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: Yes, And the second the second stage, if we're going
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: in order, would be anger, and with anger, it could
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: be different phases of anger because in different stages of anger,
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: because you can be angry with yourself, you can be
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: anger with that person that left you, and then a
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: lot of people have expressed that they've even got angry
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: with God. So there could be like phases in different
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: stages of anger and how you process anger. So with that,
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: what are some of your experiences or some things that
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: you have observed about the anger process. Starting with doctor Kimberny.
• 21:17
  Speaker 3: You touched on something that is so surreal for me
• 21:21
  Speaker 3: walking in the office that I walk in, and that
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: is people being angry with God. We see that so
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: many times because you'll see people that will labor in
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: prayer for loved ones or for individuals you're you're laboring
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: in your petitioning God to heal them and to restore
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: them and to make them whole again or make them
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: well again, not to take them away. And so when
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: it does happen, you find that many people will tend
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: to get angry with God because they're like God, you
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: promise God, you said, you know, why did you do
• 22:01
  Speaker 3: this to me?
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: God?
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: You know they will they will get this anger and
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: this emotion runs rampant for a period of time. And
• 22:12
  Speaker 3: many times I've seen individuals that have experienced this place
• 22:17
  Speaker 3: in the grief process, and it lingers for years. That
• 22:22
  Speaker 3: people will walk away from God. They will walk away
• 22:25
  Speaker 3: from the church. They will walk away from what their
• 22:28
  Speaker 3: spiritual foundation or their belief has once been because of
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: the transitioning of a loved one and the labor and
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: time that they have put into prayer and praying for
• 22:43
  Speaker 3: God to intervene and intercede on the behalf of their
• 22:46
  Speaker 3: loved one.
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: Boom wow, yep. I have definitely I have definitely seen that.
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: I have definitely seen that, Trevidah, what are your thoughts
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: on anger?
• 23:04
  Speaker 3: Anger is a difficult one, yet that's always the number
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: one thing that we always go and question God, like,
• 23:12
  Speaker 3: why did you have to take them? Now? You know,
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: what was the reason? What was the purpose? You promised
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: me more time? But we oftentimes forget that that person
• 23:24
  Speaker 3: already had in a destinated time to come home, and
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: we have to be mindful of that. Even though we're
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: praying on this side for him to heal them, God
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: already had a predestined date for them when they were
• 23:39
  Speaker 3: first born. And I think that's one of the things
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: that we throw out the window when it comes to
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: them leaving, you know, is that we forget that He
• 23:50
  Speaker 3: already gave us a timeline. And I think once we're
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: able to understand that a little bit better that anger
• 23:56
  Speaker 3: won't be so much, but it's still going to be
• 23:58
  Speaker 3: there in a sense.
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: M shit.
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: You know, I agree with the other co hosts, Apostle,
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: Kimberly and Trevida. You you do question God and you
• 24:19
  Speaker 4: you do forget that we're only here for to do
• 24:22
  Speaker 4: a to do our assignment and then we're leave. But
• 24:27
  Speaker 4: then you also after you go from being mad at God, okay,
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: then it's like you jump being mad at that person, like,
• 24:39
  Speaker 4: oh you you just gonna leave me.
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: You see what iut going through.
• 24:44
  Speaker 4: And you know now if you was, if you was here,
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: I wouldn't be going through this. You know, I see that.
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: It's just like you just you're so angry. You want
• 24:58
  Speaker 4: to have a Florida Evans moment where you just want
• 25:03
  Speaker 4: to throw that pot and be like, you know, you
• 25:08
  Speaker 4: want to act like that.
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: It's just I mean angry. Oh well you can go
• 25:15
  Speaker 4: back and forth. You can be angry for no reason. Yeah,
• 25:20
  Speaker 4: you know, it's just you just got to just find
• 25:26
  Speaker 4: your space. You don't want to get too angry where
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: you hurt yourself or hurt someone, or say something to
• 25:33
  Speaker 4: someone that you can't get them words back to because
• 25:36
  Speaker 4: you're what are your experience, so just you know, kind
• 25:41
  Speaker 4: of do a couple of woof shows and relax.
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: Miss Dane.
• 25:51
  Speaker 5: Yes, I was going to say thank you everyone, so
• 25:53
  Speaker 5: many good perspectives regarding anger. How much could just information
• 25:57
  Speaker 5: that's been provided, Just thinking about how for those that
• 26:01
  Speaker 5: are just stuck in their anger, like right now and
• 26:04
  Speaker 5: they just feel like I can't move past this, you know,
• 26:07
  Speaker 5: I just can't stop being angry. May you just be encouraged.
• 26:10
  Speaker 5: I love encouraging others and just reminding others that in
• 26:13
  Speaker 5: the midst of like everything that's going on, that anger
• 26:15
  Speaker 5: is a normal human emotion, and just thinking about how
• 26:19
  Speaker 5: we serve a big God and in the midst of
• 26:20
  Speaker 5: our like God can handle it, and just be re
• 26:23
  Speaker 5: minded to a lot of times people make you feel
• 26:24
  Speaker 5: guilty for being angry. They'll say, Oh, your faith's not
• 26:26
  Speaker 5: big enough. That's why you're so angry. You need to
• 26:28
  Speaker 5: read your Bible more. It's important to have big faith.
• 26:31
  Speaker 5: It's important to read our Bible too. But I think
• 26:32
  Speaker 5: about Jonah, who's one of my favorite characters in the Bible,
• 26:36
  Speaker 5: and how he grumbled and how you know, God provided
• 26:39
  Speaker 5: him with his plant to shade him and then it
• 26:41
  Speaker 5: was taken away and he was angry and just being
• 26:44
  Speaker 5: reminded of that, and I'm like, Okay, God understands and
• 26:46
  Speaker 5: we feel angry, but the whole thing is not to
• 26:48
  Speaker 5: stay in it. So hopefully're able to get unstuck or
• 26:51
  Speaker 5: move past that anger. But I know that it's not easy.
• 26:53
  Speaker 5: So just wanted to encourage you.
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: Wow, thank you. So the next phase that would be bargaining. Hmm.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: That's when you you want to make deals. That that
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: that's when you want to play prices right, and you
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: want to make vows and you want to do all
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: these different things. So what has that looked like? What
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: has that looked like for you guys who have experienced
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: whether you ebserved it or you've experienced it yourself, what
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: has that looked like on this journey?
• 27:48
  Speaker 3: I would say for me personally, for the bargaining stage,
• 27:53
  Speaker 3: when like, after having my stroke, I've had to grieve
• 27:56
  Speaker 3: the old version of myself before my stroke, So I
• 28:01
  Speaker 3: you know that was that that process of God. If
• 28:04
  Speaker 3: you get me to feeling better, get me to a
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: new space, you know, then I'll do what it is
• 28:12
  Speaker 3: that you need me to do. And that's where I
• 28:16
  Speaker 3: can say, the bargaining came, and God, if you get
• 28:18
  Speaker 3: me up to walk, and I'll make sure that every
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: step I take glorifies you, you know, and I'll be
• 28:26
  Speaker 3: in the church house every Sunday or you know, just
• 28:29
  Speaker 3: those kinds of things. And that's where the bargaining for
• 28:34
  Speaker 3: me as far as that has been in my life.
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: And I've been true to that, you know, in a sense,
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: I'm not in the church house every Sunday, but every
• 28:44
  Speaker 3: step that I take is an intentional step towards, you know,
• 28:49
  Speaker 3: being a vessel for God's grace and mercy for myself
• 28:53
  Speaker 3: and others.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: Man.
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: And I definitely can relate to that because I remember
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: going through a situation and I can say I was
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: grieving because I was at a point to where I
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: didn't think, well, I never doubt it. But you hear
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: the doctors tell your dad that you may not walk.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: If you walk, then you know that's a limb. That's
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: something that you you know, you may have to you
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: learn how to do all over again. So I remember
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: going through phases where I felt like, you know, okay, God,
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: I bargain. I remember saying and and and that's how
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: I got to, you know, doing a lot of the
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: things that I'm doing now because I wanted to share
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: his goodness. But I said, I didn't want to stay
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: in the pool pit. You know that that you know
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: what I'm saying, And that was just where I was.
• 29:53
  Speaker 2: And you know, He's still gonna be who he is.
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: But I just remember that was a a phase for me,
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: you know, and everybody experience could be different. It may
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: not have been bargaining like that. It could have been
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: a different type of bargaining. So did you experience or
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: have you experienced that in any type of way? Have
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: you witnessed it? Doctor Apostle Kimberley.
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: I have, and I can relate to what Trevida has
• 30:30
  Speaker 3: said about. You know, certain situations and circumstances that you
• 30:34
  Speaker 3: see and you also experienced in your own personal life
• 30:39
  Speaker 3: where there are things that happen or things that are
• 30:43
  Speaker 3: potentially taken away, or things that you are looking at
• 30:49
  Speaker 3: in your life and you are saying to God, God please,
• 30:53
  Speaker 3: you know, you're pleading with God to help you, and
• 30:56
  Speaker 3: you're making all kinds of vows and promises and and
• 31:00
  Speaker 3: just pleading with God to restore you and to bring
• 31:04
  Speaker 3: you back up to where you may have once been.
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: I've seen individuals who have been hurt or damaged on
• 31:13
  Speaker 3: their journey, even in their workplaces, and seeing them go
• 31:18
  Speaker 3: through this stage of bargaining with God to be restored
• 31:23
  Speaker 3: to wholeness, to be restored to where they were actually
• 31:27
  Speaker 3: able to utilize limbs again and able to get up
• 31:32
  Speaker 3: and move about without the assistance of others or having
• 31:36
  Speaker 3: to go through the process of having someone to be,
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: you know, there for them twenty four to seven to
• 31:43
  Speaker 3: help them to do things. So it is a place
• 31:48
  Speaker 3: where we all can pretty much say that we have
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: experienced some type of bargaining in our life at one
• 31:56
  Speaker 3: point or another to where we have truly been on
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: the side of asking and pleading with God to bring
• 32:06
  Speaker 3: us to that place of restoration and wholeness.
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: Wow. I also want to share with you guys, if
• 32:14
  Speaker 2: you are tuning in and you would like to join
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: the conversation, we have a call in number. If you
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: would like to call in, it is four two four
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: three one nine nine nine two five. Again it is
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: four two four three one nine nine nine two five.
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: If you want to join the conversation live on air
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: with us, you can call in via that number and
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: join the conversation. We just asked that no cussing and
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: be respectful.
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: That's all.
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: I have to put that disclaimer out there because you know,
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: when we when we're going through sometime, we sometime express
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: that way. So just wanted to put it out there.
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: So we still have Daniella and Shannette. If you guys
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: would like to chime in on bargaining, you.
• 33:15
  Speaker 4: Know, I don't The type of bargaining that I experienced
• 33:20
  Speaker 4: was when it was in the marriage and you know
• 33:27
  Speaker 4: how you just won't let that person go. You just like, Lord,
• 33:32
  Speaker 4: you're just fixing, Lord, if you're just touching, you know,
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: just making right because I don't want to be you know,
• 33:41
  Speaker 4: I don't want to divorce. I didn't get married to
• 33:44
  Speaker 4: get divorced. So that's the type of bargaining that I
• 33:48
  Speaker 4: went through. And still, you know, God was like, nope,
• 33:52
  Speaker 4: he's that's that's not who you're supposed to be with.
• 33:56
  Speaker 4: So that that that went on by, and you know,
• 34:04
  Speaker 4: when my son was I think he was probably about
• 34:09
  Speaker 4: he had his first asthma attack and it was real bad,
• 34:14
  Speaker 4: and I was just asking God, you know, Lord, if
• 34:19
  Speaker 4: you if you save him, if you keep him here,
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: you know, I give him back to you. You know,
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: I would train him up and and I'll give him
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: back to you. And you know, so you know those
• 34:31
  Speaker 4: are different type of bargainings. I did, you know with
• 34:35
  Speaker 4: a marriage with also with my son when he was little,
• 34:39
  Speaker 4: when he had his first asthma attack.
• 34:45
  Speaker 2: Man mis d yella, would you like your share in
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: the stage?
• 34:50
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I was thinking, sometimes I can't even think of
• 34:53
  Speaker 5: a time my life even bargaining with God even worked,
• 34:56
  Speaker 5: and it's like I keep doing it, but oftentimes it
• 34:59
  Speaker 5: doesn't work, and just thinking about how depending on the situation.
• 35:02
  Speaker 5: I know it's different when it's the loss of a person,
• 35:04
  Speaker 5: like a physical loss, like than passing away. But just
• 35:07
  Speaker 5: think about my own life when it comes to an
• 35:09
  Speaker 5: any relationship or a job or another opportunity. A lot
• 35:12
  Speaker 5: of time it's God teaching me to let go of
• 35:14
  Speaker 5: something where it's reaching his expiration date and I want
• 35:17
  Speaker 5: to keep holding on to it. I want to keep
• 35:19
  Speaker 5: holding onto it and God has something better in it.
• 35:21
  Speaker 5: I know it's different when it's like a loss or
• 35:23
  Speaker 5: person and it's just like in that moment, no, you're like,
• 35:26
  Speaker 5: well no, having this person my life is better. But
• 35:29
  Speaker 5: when I've come to it when it's come to a
• 35:31
  Speaker 5: job where I'm not getting treated the way I should be,
• 35:34
  Speaker 5: a relationship where God said no, I have something better,
• 35:37
  Speaker 5: or it's not healthier, it's toxic, and I'm like, I
• 35:39
  Speaker 5: want to keep holding on and God, if you do this,
• 35:42
  Speaker 5: I'll give you this. If you do this, I'll do this.
• 35:44
  Speaker 5: I'll be this. And when it comes to relationships and
• 35:47
  Speaker 5: jobs and some other opportunities, it hasn't been worth it
• 35:50
  Speaker 5: for me personally.
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: Wow. So that is the bargain phase. So we know
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: that there are are five phases. Two brief So to
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: that person that may be tuning in and for my
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: co hosts, got a question for you. How are you
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: feeling today? How are you feeling today? Anybody chime in.
• 36:34
  Speaker 3: To they I am feeling pretty good, you know, just
• 36:41
  Speaker 3: moving through the way of life, you know, getting accustomed
• 36:48
  Speaker 3: to the newness of life without my mom. So it's
• 36:56
  Speaker 3: still new and fresh and I have the reminders that
• 36:59
  Speaker 3: come up, you know. But today was really a good day,
• 37:03
  Speaker 3: you know, no complaints. You know, I'm at the I
• 37:12
  Speaker 3: can say that I'm good today. Yeah, Now I don't
• 37:17
  Speaker 3: have anything was today about that? Yeah, today is a
• 37:20
  Speaker 3: good day.
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: Doctor apostle Kimberly, how are you today?
• 37:28
  Speaker 3: I am doing well today. I must say that today
• 37:32
  Speaker 3: has been a good day for me as well. I
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: thank God for this day. I thank him for just peace.
• 37:40
  Speaker 3: There are many days that we go through and don't
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: have peace, and I've had some days where I have
• 37:46
  Speaker 3: not had peace lately. But I thank God for a
• 37:49
  Speaker 3: sense of peace. I thank Him for just being able
• 37:53
  Speaker 3: to rest in Him and knowing that He has everything
• 37:58
  Speaker 3: under control. I'm just grateful today for this day or
• 38:03
  Speaker 3: a day of peace.
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: Amen, Miss Daniella, how are you today?
• 38:13
  Speaker 5: Yes, thank you for asking?
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: Doing all right?
• 38:16
  Speaker 5: Just wondering. I'm always have this thing of wondering what
• 38:18
  Speaker 5: God has in store next. I've moved to a new
• 38:21
  Speaker 5: state almost about a year ago, and it will be
• 38:23
  Speaker 5: that one year anniversary in May, and I'm like, okay, God,
• 38:26
  Speaker 5: i haven't found a church home yet. I need to
• 38:28
  Speaker 5: move in two months again, and just wondering what's next.
• 38:32
  Speaker 5: But in the midst of a tornado warning last night,
• 38:34
  Speaker 5: just being reminded of how much of in control that
• 38:36
  Speaker 5: I'm not, and I'm like, Okay, God, I know you're
• 38:38
  Speaker 5: in control. I know you have a greater plan in
• 38:40
  Speaker 5: this and just trusting him and waiting to see what
• 38:43
  Speaker 5: he has in store next.
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: Amen, Amen, and mission, how are you today?
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: I am doing wonderful. I got new hair. You know,
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: I am under construct. I'm sixteen months out from laying
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: my since my son transitioned. So you know, today it
• 39:09
  Speaker 4: was a good day. It was a it was a
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: good day for me, and I feel my strength coming
• 39:18
  Speaker 4: returning that five o'clock prayer just morning. It was a
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: good day. It was a good day for me, A
• 39:34
  Speaker 4: good day.
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: Amen. Amen, Amen, So Angela, how are you feeling today?
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: I'm doing good. I can't complain, I won't complain. I'm
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: doing great. Today has been a great day. It's been
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: rough these last couple of months, but today's it has
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: been a great day because I'm getting ready to celebrate
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: my fiftieth birthday in two days, so today it is
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: it is a great day. I'm I'm I'm excited because
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: you know, I found people that I can talk to.
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: I found a place where I've learned how to express.
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: I thank him for the gift of writing. I thank
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: him for the outlet of being an author and being
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: able to be in the presence of some amazing people
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: that support your creative side, and you support each other,
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: and you find ways that you can release things. You know,
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: every day is not a good day, and he never
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: said that every day was gonna be a good day.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: So we learn, we are learning how to learn things
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: that can help us cope and get through what we're
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: going through. So I'm good today, I would say, So,
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: I got a question, I got another question. We're gonna
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: ask some questions. I got some questions. And if y'all
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: want to call in, you can call in five four
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: two four, three one nine nine nine two five again
• 41:43
  Speaker 2: four two four, three one nine nine nine two five.
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: And don't be talking about the way I say them numbers.
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: I'm from Anderson, South Carolina. Y'all it come out sometimes.
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: But y'all can call in chat with us. You can
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: share whatever you want to share on the topic of
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: grief and anything that may have despite your interest. As
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: we have been sharing, we have gotten up to bargaining.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: We have two more stages to go through. We just
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: stopped for a moment to see how we were doing
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: and just to share because sometimes you have to take
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: a break, and it's okay to take a break. It's
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: okay to say Okay, let me, let me be mad
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: for a minute, but don't stay over there in madness,
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: because while you're over there being mad, you know, the
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: world keep on going. So get you two minutes of
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: madness in and then you go on now trying not
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: to stay over that five minutes because if you stay
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: over that five minutes, you but I can't tell you
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: how long it's stay now. And that's one thing about
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: this process. There's no timeframe, and there's no one to
• 43:07
  Speaker 2: say that you may go through angry. You may say, Okay,
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: I accept this. That may be the stage that you
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: go through first, and then you may not go through
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: all that, and then later on you may go back,
• 43:21
  Speaker 2: and then you may get angry. So we're gonna move
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: on to depression, because that would be number four, that
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: would be the fourth stage, and I'm gonna start with.
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: Apostle, yes, ma'am. Depression, Oh, this is an area of
• 43:52
  Speaker 3: grief that I truly believe a lot of times we
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: don't realize that we are in this stage. Depression shows
• 44:03
  Speaker 3: up in so many different ways that we really don't
• 44:09
  Speaker 3: recognize that it's truly depression. You know, I learned that
• 44:15
  Speaker 3: depression can show up just not in a person just
• 44:21
  Speaker 3: merely just being withdrawn, but even in the way that
• 44:28
  Speaker 3: we dress, in our appearances, in our withdrawals. There's so
• 44:35
  Speaker 3: many different ways that depression shows up when we begin
• 44:40
  Speaker 3: to isolate ourselves and stop wanting to really engage and
• 44:45
  Speaker 3: do the things in which we may have once did.
• 44:50
  Speaker 3: It's very Depression is something that is very subtle, and
• 44:55
  Speaker 3: it creeps in and then suddenly it has a stronghold
• 44:59
  Speaker 3: on you to the point to where if you are
• 45:02
  Speaker 3: not rooted and grounded and strong enough, it could very
• 45:06
  Speaker 3: well take you under. And for many that are in
• 45:11
  Speaker 3: the religious or Christian community, many people don't feel that
• 45:17
  Speaker 3: they need to go and sit on somebody's couch. They
• 45:20
  Speaker 3: feel that there's you know, we can pray our way
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: through everything, and prayer works. Don't get me wrong, prayer works,
• 45:29
  Speaker 3: and prayer is our first line of defense. But there
• 45:33
  Speaker 3: are times when we just really need to sit down
• 45:36
  Speaker 3: and talk to somebody to allow somebody to hear us,
• 45:40
  Speaker 3: to even verbalize what we're going through, so that we
• 45:44
  Speaker 3: can even hear ourselves. So depression is something that is,
• 45:50
  Speaker 3: like I said, it's very subtle and it can creep
• 45:54
  Speaker 3: in on you and if you are not careful, you
• 45:59
  Speaker 3: can be swet. That's a way in the spirit of.
• 46:07
  Speaker 2: Can Yeah.
• 46:11
  Speaker 5: I second that, and I want so many people that
• 46:14
  Speaker 5: are listening to know the depression is real. It's not
• 46:16
  Speaker 5: all in your head. It doesn't mean that you are weak.
• 46:20
  Speaker 5: I knowsally. Personally, I've learned the depression runs in my family,
• 46:23
  Speaker 5: and since we don't talk about it, I didn't know.
• 46:25
  Speaker 5: I just thought, Oh, I'm just sad, or I just
• 46:27
  Speaker 5: need to pray more. I just need to go to
• 46:29
  Speaker 5: church where I just need to do more of this
• 46:31
  Speaker 5: or that or this or whatever. The more is that
• 46:33
  Speaker 5: maybe you have in your life that you're just trying
• 46:35
  Speaker 5: to do more, be more, you know, serve more, whatever
• 46:38
  Speaker 5: it is. But just know that it's okay to reach
• 46:40
  Speaker 5: out for help. It's okay to be honest. It's okay
• 46:43
  Speaker 5: to say, Okay, maybe your family isn't supportive of you
• 46:47
  Speaker 5: seeking help or getting help. We might be telling the
• 46:49
  Speaker 5: family seeker or whatever they tell you, you know, to
• 46:51
  Speaker 5: stop you from speaking to someone. But just know that
• 46:53
  Speaker 5: you're healing is important, and it's okay to talk to
• 46:56
  Speaker 5: someone about things that are going on. Life is hard,
• 46:58
  Speaker 5: things get happy, and we think about you Jesus, he
• 47:00
  Speaker 5: had the disciples. So you know, there's some people in
• 47:03
  Speaker 5: the Bible that have other people to talk to and
• 47:05
  Speaker 5: to reach out to, and God calls us to do
• 47:06
  Speaker 5: the same.
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: Amen, and shunette.
• 47:15
  Speaker 4: Depression. That one. I agree with Apostle and Daniella with
• 47:25
  Speaker 4: their statements. You'll find yourself really like like you just existing.
• 47:35
  Speaker 4: You don't you you don't have no will power to
• 47:44
  Speaker 4: do anything. You just like in a whole nother land,
• 47:50
  Speaker 4: or you know, you start thinking about harming yourself. And
• 47:58
  Speaker 4: but again, you have to remain strong. You have to
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: know who's in your circle, who's who's around you. And
• 48:07
  Speaker 4: when you have people that love and care for you
• 48:11
  Speaker 4: and they see that you're going into a depression, don't
• 48:16
  Speaker 4: push them away. Listen to him, Talk to him, you know, feedback,
• 48:22
  Speaker 4: Get up and move around, Go for a walk, go
• 48:26
  Speaker 4: for take a shower, go for a drive. You know,
• 48:30
  Speaker 4: because depression is that is a sort of a gun.
• 48:34
  Speaker 4: You will find you will be crying, but and you
• 48:37
  Speaker 4: don't even know why you crying. I mean, just you know,
• 48:43
  Speaker 4: like the like the lady says, go sit on someone's couch,
• 48:47
  Speaker 4: because depression is it. I mean, you really really have
• 48:54
  Speaker 4: to have strong, a strong mind and a strong your
• 49:00
  Speaker 4: Your faith had to be so rooted in God to
• 49:03
  Speaker 4: come to get pulled up out of that. Depression is
• 49:06
  Speaker 4: nothing to play with, especially when you.
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: Grieve, inn are.
• 49:11
  Speaker 4: Whatever you in seek helps all seek help.
• 49:21
  Speaker 3: And Trevida, yeah, depression, I agree with everything everyone else
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: has said. Depression is one of those things that definitely
• 49:30
  Speaker 3: will sneak up on you when you are least expecting
• 49:35
  Speaker 3: it and being able to recognize what it looks like.
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: And definitely in black families, so we don't talk about depression.
• 49:43
  Speaker 3: It's always you know, it'll be okay, you're strong, you'll
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: get through this. It's not too hard. And one of
• 49:51
  Speaker 3: the things that I want people to understand is that
• 49:55
  Speaker 3: just because this person has always exhibited strength doesn't mean
• 49:59
  Speaker 3: that they have the capacity to be strong in those moments.
• 50:03
  Speaker 3: And saying to them, oh, it's fine, you'll get through this,
• 50:07
  Speaker 3: it's the least thing that that person wants to hear
• 50:10
  Speaker 3: in that moment because they don't feel strong. They want
• 50:13
  Speaker 3: to be acknowledged for what they're feeling and not being
• 50:17
  Speaker 3: told you're strong enough to withstand this. That's not easy
• 50:21
  Speaker 3: when they don't feel it. And if you are dismissive
• 50:25
  Speaker 3: of what they're telling you. It makes it worse and
• 50:28
  Speaker 3: they stay in that space a lot longer than they're
• 50:32
  Speaker 3: able to get out of it. So I think having
• 50:36
  Speaker 3: a true support system around you that listens and hears
• 50:40
  Speaker 3: you even when you're silent, that's really key. It is
• 50:45
  Speaker 3: having people around you who hear you when you're silent,
• 50:48
  Speaker 3: and they know that something is wrong and they give
• 50:51
  Speaker 3: you that space and that opportunity to just vent and
• 50:55
  Speaker 3: say whatever it is, even if it's nothing that you
• 50:57
  Speaker 3: want to say, but it's those tears you want to
• 50:59
  Speaker 3: release and get off. It's important to have that kind
• 51:02
  Speaker 3: of support around you when it comes to dealing with depression,
• 51:06
  Speaker 3: because everybody doesn't understand that there's a such thing as
• 51:10
  Speaker 3: functioning depression. You know, when we just go through the motions,
• 51:14
  Speaker 3: because we're so used to getting up and doing what
• 51:18
  Speaker 3: needs to be done that nobody can even say, oh, well,
• 51:23
  Speaker 3: you don't look depressed. Well, what really does depression look like?
• 51:27
  Speaker 3: There's symptoms and their signs, but it doesn't always look
• 51:32
  Speaker 3: and present the same with each person. So we have
• 51:35
  Speaker 3: to be mindful of that.
• 51:39
  Speaker 2: Right right Because with me depression, I battled depression for years,
• 51:48
  Speaker 2: did not know that I had been battling depression. And
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: once I went through domestic violence, it was domestic violence,
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: and I went through counseling that I was able to,
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: you know, find out that I have been battling depression
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: since my mom passed. My mom passed in nineteen ninety one.
• 52:09
  Speaker 2: I didn't find out that I had been battling depression
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: because again I didn't know what depression looked like. I
• 52:16
  Speaker 2: didn't know what because nobody talked about it. They don't
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: talk about it in the Brown family. And like Apostle saying,
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: you know, I hear people all the time. You gotta
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: be strong, you know, pray about it, pray about it.
• 52:29
  Speaker 2: You know a lot of people would go on in
• 52:30
  Speaker 2: our house, stay in our house. They don't want you
• 52:32
  Speaker 2: to talk about those those things. But we have to
• 52:36
  Speaker 2: come to a place to where we say trauma no more.
• 52:40
  Speaker 2: We cannot keep allowing trauma to keep going for and
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: a lot of these things that we don't know what
• 52:47
  Speaker 2: it is, you know, we think we're battling something. Like
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: I thought I was depressed one day and I called
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: one of my friends. I'm glad I got some friends
• 52:55
  Speaker 2: that are therapist. She said, baby, She said, how long
• 52:58
  Speaker 2: you been sitting in at that computer? She said, you
• 53:01
  Speaker 2: probably just need to go out and get you some sunlight.
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: And then a lot of things we misdiagnosed too, so
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: it is important that we seek professional help sometimes. You
• 53:14
  Speaker 2: know a lot of people, you know, we got these stigmas,
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: and it's time for us to let these stigmas down
• 53:19
  Speaker 2: because now you don't have to go and sit down
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: on a lot of people have a problem with sitting
• 53:23
  Speaker 2: down on other people's other race couch. They want to
• 53:27
  Speaker 2: sit down because they feel like they don't know them.
• 53:29
  Speaker 2: So now you have qualified individuals that look like you,
• 53:34
  Speaker 2: that have done the work and have been through the experience.
• 53:38
  Speaker 2: You know, a lot of us we've been through things.
• 53:41
  Speaker 2: We have experienced things, so we we've done the work
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: so that we can heal, so that we can help
• 53:48
  Speaker 2: others heal. So now you get to a phase where
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: now you're okay with everything, you you're you're you're ready.
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: You you have accepted these things and you're ready to
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: go on with life. You're you're ready to move forward.
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: That let's talk about that acceptance which is supposed to
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: be that final phase, which we know is not always
• 54:10
  Speaker 2: the final phase. But we're gonna say that's that last
• 54:13
  Speaker 2: phase that we're supposed to go through in this process.
• 54:17
  Speaker 2: So now that we're there, can anyone share with me
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: what acceptance look like to them? What does that look
• 54:25
  Speaker 2: like to you? Who wants to start? I start?
• 54:32
  Speaker 3: I say, for me, acceptance looks like it's it's the final.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: Goodbye.
• 54:41
  Speaker 3: You know, there is no no repeating of why did
• 54:47
  Speaker 3: you lead? You know, I understand that that was their
• 54:52
  Speaker 3: time and it has It still isn't always easy, but
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: I know when I'm starting to have that conversation of
• 55:02
  Speaker 3: the repetitive acceptance speech, it's like, no, you know, their
• 55:07
  Speaker 3: time was up. They've done everything that they were supposed
• 55:10
  Speaker 3: to do. Even if I feel like it was incomplete,
• 55:13
  Speaker 3: even if I feel like I didn't have enough time,
• 55:16
  Speaker 3: I understand that God said their time here was up.
• 55:20
  Speaker 3: They had to go. And that's what it looks like for.
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: Me, Snett.
• 55:32
  Speaker 4: You know I've been it seemed like when I get
• 55:36
  Speaker 4: to acceptance, I I go back, it's like I can't,
• 55:43
  Speaker 4: I haven't. I get to acceptance and I'm like, okay,
• 55:46
  Speaker 4: I got do I really have to accept this? And
• 55:50
  Speaker 4: then you know I'm not. I didn't get there the first.
• 55:54
  Speaker 4: You know, I haven't got there. But now I am
• 56:00
  Speaker 4: starting to accept that it was it was his time
• 56:06
  Speaker 4: to leave, his time to transition. And I think that
• 56:16
  Speaker 4: the reason why I wasn't at the stage to accept
• 56:20
  Speaker 4: it because I thought I would lose his memory that
• 56:25
  Speaker 4: I was. You know that since he's gone, that my
• 56:30
  Speaker 4: life is my life is not worth living. That's you know,
• 56:34
  Speaker 4: I went through all them faces. Then when I get
• 56:37
  Speaker 4: to acceptance, I can't accept it. But now when I
• 56:41
  Speaker 4: just said that when you asked us about bargaining, when
• 56:45
  Speaker 4: I said that I bargained with God when my son
• 56:49
  Speaker 4: was a baby, when he had that asthma attack, and
• 56:52
  Speaker 4: I said, I giving back to you if you heal
• 56:54
  Speaker 4: my son, I am giving back to you. So by
• 56:59
  Speaker 4: me making that statement, and now that he's really gone,
• 57:05
  Speaker 4: and I wanted him back, but you know, I know
• 57:08
  Speaker 4: I can't have him back. So now I'm at acceptance.
• 57:11
  Speaker 4: I have to accept the fact that his time was
• 57:17
  Speaker 4: that third God, God gave him to me for thirty
• 57:20
  Speaker 4: one years, and you know that's I have to accept
• 57:26
  Speaker 4: it and I have to be strong.
• 57:29
  Speaker 2: I really have to.
• 57:30
  Speaker 4: Accept it now because he has a son and I
• 57:34
  Speaker 4: have to get him. I have to be strong enough
• 57:38
  Speaker 4: for him. I have to let him know that it's okay,
• 57:42
  Speaker 4: it's okay. Well, you know it's okay. So I am
• 57:47
  Speaker 4: slowly getting into the acceptance. I'm just not My hand
• 57:53
  Speaker 4: is like kind of you know how you know, God
• 57:56
  Speaker 4: is telling me to open my hand all the way,
• 57:58
  Speaker 4: but it's kind of like still kind of cloth, like
• 58:01
  Speaker 4: it's halfway open, but it's not all the way open. Well,
• 58:05
  Speaker 4: I'm ready to release him, but I know it's coming
• 58:09
  Speaker 4: that I'm going to really have to release him. So
• 58:12
  Speaker 4: I will be lying to you guys if I say
• 58:15
  Speaker 4: that I'm already in the acceptance space, when I know
• 58:22
  Speaker 4: that i'm not. I know that my strength is coming
• 58:25
  Speaker 4: back and that my hand is going to open when
• 58:30
  Speaker 4: I'm fully ready to release him. That's, you know, I'm
• 58:36
  Speaker 4: being honest. You know, that's I have one foot in
• 58:43
  Speaker 4: acceptance and one foot going back all the way there.
• 58:50
  Speaker 2: And that's the most important thing that we be honest
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: with ourselves because that's the only way that we can heal,
• 58:57
  Speaker 2: that's the only way that we can grow, and that's
• 58:59
  Speaker 2: the only way that people that are around us will
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: be able to understand. You know, exactly what we're going
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: through and what we experiencing, So even when they may
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: experience it, because again we all are going to experience
• 59:12
  Speaker 2: this in some way, shape or form, so you know,
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: again we know that it's going to happen. So how
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: do we get through it? How do we cope it
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: and apostle?
• 59:28
  Speaker 3: Yes, ma'am. For me, I agree with Trevita. When it
• 59:36
  Speaker 3: comes to acceptance, it's like when everything is final when
• 59:43
  Speaker 3: dealing with grief, mostly especially to be able to accept
• 59:48
  Speaker 3: it for me, is the lid on the casket has
• 59:54
  Speaker 3: been closed. We are at the cemetery and we have
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 3: the benediction has been given, and so at that point
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 3: there is no more there's no more denial, there's no
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 3: more bargaining, there's no more of anything other than to accept.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 3: There's that stage. May we still may go through the anger,
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 3: but the acceptance makes it, makes it it's valid at
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 3: that point because now this is real, this is real
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 3: because once that casket has been closed, that's that's the
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 3: final process. Once we are at the cemetery and the
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 3: everything has taken place and the benediction has been given,
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 3: that's the final process. So at that point, this is
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: the point where we have to get to the place
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 3: of accepting what God has allowed, accepting the fact that
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 3: they're not coming back. They're not coming back. This is it.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 3: And so acceptance is really a difficult place. And I
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 3: can say in my case, acceptance was it was fairly
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 3: hard for me to get to the place of acceptance.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 3: But once we have gone through the whole process and
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 3: understanding that this is the will of the Lord, and
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 3: so I have no other choice other than to accept
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 3: the will of God and move forward, knowing that life
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 3: will never be the same as it has been with
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 3: that individual being present. But I realize that I can
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 3: push through and I can continue to live because all
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 3: things are possible and they have been made possible unto
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 3: me through the spirit of Christ.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 2: Wow. So I mean, y'all have really shared some valid
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 2: points and with me, I've gotten to the point to
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 2: where I thought I was accepting. And then and and
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 2: this is with my brother, because this was one of
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 2: those that I wanted to deny this, I got angry
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 2: about it. I mean, I went through all five, all five,
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: and then I went back and repeated so and then
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 2: I'm still back in a phase now to where I'm
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 2: like bruh, how you leave me? Rank, I just can't
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 2: believe you go like, this is gonna be my first
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 2: birthday h without that phone call. So like I'm I'm
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 2: I'm still going through. That's why I say, y'all journey
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: and this with us. You may see some emotions, you
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: may see some different things, but I can say I
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 2: have experienced all five of these stages, and again I'm
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 2: I'm I'm repeating them and and going through. But I've
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 2: learned one thing is that there's power and what you
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 2: speak over your life, and you got to learn how
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 2: to speak to to speak things over your life, how
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 2: to speak into your life. You know there's days when
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 2: I how to say, Angela, you gotta shake out of this,
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 2: You gotta you gotta, you gotta move from this, and
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 2: know that it's okay to not be okay, but know
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: that there is people out here that can help you
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 2: that you don't have to not be okay. It's okay
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 2: to feel the way you feel, but learn how to
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: channel those emotions, learn how to get through those emotions.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: And I hope that this space is going to be
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 2: able to provide that for you. We're gonna go around
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 2: again and I want everyone to just share a little
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 2: bit about what they want to be able to bring
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 2: to the listening audience. As we share over the next
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 2: three shows, I want to start with Shanet.
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 4: What I would like is that to let everyone to
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 4: know that you're not alone when you're going through depression,
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 4: when you're going through the different stages, you're not alone.
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 4: You're not alone, and that there's help out there if
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 4: you just need someone to talk to, you know, figure
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 4: out who's that person that's you can call that's going
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 4: to be a listening ear when you call him and
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 4: when you having a date. Like everyone said, don't stay
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 4: there once that once it hits you, once grief come up,
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 4: once it comes because when you start, when you get
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 4: that smith, well, you gonna think that you've seen that
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 4: person walk down the street. You're gonna any little thing
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 4: that reminds you of them or your is your triggers.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 4: So find you someone that that's gonna be a listening
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 4: ear and that's going to listen to you, that's gonna
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 4: let you pour it out. Then what Angela is my
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 4: listening here. My sister is my listening ear. I have
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 4: a couple of more family members that are listening. Also write.
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 4: I was encouraged to write right. So when I write poetry,
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 4: I write to my son. I write my feeling. So
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 4: write it down, you know, write how you're feeling. You know.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 4: I just want you, guys, just to know that you're
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 4: not alone. Seek help, go for walk. Remember that person.
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 4: Angela gave me a good one. She asked me, how
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 4: are you honoring honor that person? I went back to school.
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 4: I've been in school for two semesters. I'm a straight
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 4: A student. Made the President list again, So honor honor
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 4: that person.
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 4: Mainly, just mainly, just don't stay in at don't don't
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 4: isolate yourself, and don't stay in that position and grief
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 4: too long. That's you know, That's that's all I can
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 4: say on that.
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 2: Apostle.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 3: For me, my hope and prayer is that as we
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 3: journey through this walk of grief, I pray and it
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 3: is my desire to truly be a healing voice, one
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 3: that is able to bring and share some life experiences
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 3: as well as some spiritual insight on how to navigate
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 3: through grief, to be able to understand that grief is
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 3: a natural process. It's a process and an experience. That
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 3: we're all going to encounter at some point in our life,
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 3: and it is on different phases and different facets in
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 3: our life that we are going to deal. There are
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 3: some that can go through the process and it seems
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 3: to be easy. There are others who seem to be
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 3: so strong that it really does not affect them in
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 3: a major way. But then there are others who seem
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 3: to go through the process and never be able to
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 3: really get their footing and just fall into a spirit
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 3: of depression. But it is my hope and my desire
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 3: that as we go through and as we share our
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 3: experiences and as we are able to bring the things
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 3: that helped us along our journey, that it will help others,
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 3: It will empower others, and it will inspire them to
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 3: continue to move forward no matter where they find themselves
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 3: in the process, to not be stuck, to not get there,
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 3: to not give up, to not throw in the towel,
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 3: and most definitely to not allow anyone to give you
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 3: the expiration date to how long you should be in
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 3: the grieving process, because for each and every one of us,
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 3: it's a unique journey, and it's a journey and which
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 3: we are all going to travel but we are going
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 3: to be traveling it at our own pace. So it
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 3: is my desire to be able to be that healing
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 3: voice and to be able to assist others in their
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 3: process as they are journeying through this life in dealing
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 3: with grief.
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 2: Amen, Amen, sure do.
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 3: I hope that we're able to bring people to us,
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 3: to give them a sense of support, to let them
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 3: know that there is no expiration date on grief, to
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 3: let them know that you can push it down as
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 3: much as you want to try to keep yourself busy,
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 3: but grief is going to show up. You're gonna have
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 3: to deal with those emotions because there's only so much
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 3: of emotional capacity that you can handle. And trying to
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 3: keep yourself your mental self busy, mental mind busy, physical
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 3: body busy, grief is going to show up in one
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 3: way or another.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 2: And I want.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 3: People to be able to know that it is okay
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 3: to deal with those feelings, to express them, and that
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 3: they're not alone when going and dealing with all of
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 3: these emotions that come up. It is okay to express
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 3: them and not to keep them inside, because when you
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 3: do keep them inside, and then when they do bubble over,
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 3: you don't know which way to go, which way to turn,
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 3: because it's too much happening at one time. So I
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 3: hope that we're able to bring a sense of normalcy
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 3: to being able to express these type of emotions when
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 3: dealing with grief.
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 2: A man and Miss Daniela.
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 5: Yes, I was also going to say, as everyone's already said,
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 5: that there is hope on the other side of what
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 5: your face right now. I know sometimes feels like you'll
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 5: never smile again, things will never get better, And then
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 5: sometimes you mightn't feel like okay when I am happy again,
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 5: you feel bad, you feel guilty, but it's okay to
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 5: move forward with your life. And just also being mindful
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 5: too that you know when you're for me, just going
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 5: into that acceptance phase of grief, it's about being intentional
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 5: and also realizing that sometimes we have to close the
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 5: door to certain people in certain circumstances. There's so many
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 5: things in life that are not in our control. But
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 5: I know from experience there's a person that comes into
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 5: my life every so often, every so many years, and
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 5: it pushes me from acceptance, back to depression and back
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 5: to anger. And I've had to close that draw on
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 5: that person saying no more, enough is enough. They've made
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 5: it clear that their intentions are not the best. God
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 5: has said to let that go. So I have control
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 5: over that on that person coming back into my life.
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 5: And so the last time I said the last one
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 5: is the last time. So I'm like, I'm going to
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 5: stick with acceptance and be okay with moving forward. So
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 5: just being reminded of that and just keep listening to
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 5: be encouraged. And there's hope.
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 2: Yes, you guys have definitely touched on some amazing things.
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 2: I tell you. I hope that this will be a
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 2: space where people will come and feel comfortable and feel
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 2: those feelings and those emotions and know that it's okay
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 2: to feel those feelings and emotions. We have someone that
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 2: says we must feel in order to heal, and I
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 2: want you to know that, yes, you have the right
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 2: to feel how you feel, but know that we just
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 2: don't want you to stay there too long. And if
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 2: you feel that you can't handle it alone, that there
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 2: are resources, there are people, there's places that you can
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 2: go to get the resources that you need and the
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 2: help that you need. So that's what we want to
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 2: be able to provide here. Again, I'm not a professional.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 2: So I'm just going to be sharing my experience, things
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 2: that I have gone through, because have I grieved.
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 1: I have.
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 2: I remember experiencing my first loss in nineteen eighty nine,
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 2: and I remember writing I think we were getting ready
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 2: to write a poetry book, and a young guy called
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 2: me and he was telling me that he was in
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 2: the process of losing the loved one. They were transitioning.
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 2: And I was able to use my experience what I
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 2: had gone through because that very same day, I smelt
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 2: smoke and there was not a fire anywhere, but I
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 2: smelt smoke. And the last time I seen my cousin
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 2: because we lived in the country and we used wood
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 2: in the fire, because we used the wood fire, so
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 2: he always smelt like smoke because he was always gathering
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 2: the wood. And I thought of him, and I was
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 2: able to share, you know, losing my cousin and my
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 2: experience with that young guy, and y'all, he was calling
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 2: me to tell me that he was not going to
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 2: be able to write in the book, but because I
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 2: was able to share my experience with him, he was
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 2: able to write in the book. He got off the
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 2: phone call with me and less than an hour y'all.
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 2: He was emailing me his session of the book. So
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 2: I tell you it's this experience in life that we
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 2: go through that it's not always for us, but will
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 2: help somebody else. So we hope that this journey, this
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 2: space that we are trying to provide for you guys,
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 2: that you would utilizer, that you would share it with somebody.
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 2: We also want you to know that you are able
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 2: to reach out to us, So of course we go
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 2: on around again and give out our contact information and
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 2: how you can follow us. We have a Facebook page
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 2: it's calling it's called the Healing Voices Navigating through Grief,
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 2: and you guys can come over to that page. We're
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 2: gonna be we're gonna be interacting and engaging and doing
• 1:16:24
  Speaker 2: different things over there. On that page, you can get
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 2: to know all of the hosts. That is a part
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 2: of this podcast because again we only have four shows,
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 2: so this is gonna give you guys an opportunity to
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 2: really connect with us. We're also on substat and I
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 2: tell you I am truly enjoying that platform. If you
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 2: not checked that platform my plug, I'm just gonna tell
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 2: you go check it out. It's an amazing platform. I
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 2: have truly been enjoying it, especially if you are a writer,
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 2: if you are someone that like to write, like to express,
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 2: it may seem like nobody's reading it. Again, they are.
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 2: They are if you look at the analytics, they are.
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 2: But y'all, we just want to be able to provide
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 2: that space for you. So before I go around again
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 2: and allow everyone to tell you how they can be
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 2: reached and how you can follow and support them as
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 2: well outside of this podcast. And also I'm encouraging them
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 2: to really engage on that platform. So you may see
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 2: them posting, you may see them going live, you may
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 2: see them posting content, you may see all kinds of
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 2: stuff going on, and we may have contests, we may
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 2: have different things to encourage you guys. So we want
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 2: you to go over, follow, like, and share the platforms.
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 2: But before I go around, I just want to recap
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 2: what all we have talked about tonight. And basically this
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 2: is our introduction podcast for the Healing Voice is Navigating
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 2: through Grief, and we will be here every fifth Sunday
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 2: from six to eight. Of course, y'all know there's not
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 2: a fifth Sunday every month. We have three more shows
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 2: and I think it's running it may be scrolling along
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 2: the bottom. But if not, if you go back out
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 2: of where you're tuning in at, there should be a
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 2: description of this show and then have that information in there.
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 2: But we definitely want you guys to tune in and
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 2: share this with somebody because you never know what they
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 2: may be going through. But we touched on the five
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 2: stages of grief denial and this is the initial stage
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 2: involving shock and disbelief. It is a defense mechanism that
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 2: buffer's the immediate shock, allowing us to process the loss gradually. Anger.
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 2: Anger is that phase that it's the second phase, and
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 2: it is that phase that as the dire phades emotion,
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 2: the emotional pain suffers, then it comes up. Anger can
• 1:19:10
  Speaker 2: be directed at oneself, others situations. It masks the underlying
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 2: issues and pain. That third stage was bargaining. Bargaining is
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 2: that stage, but individuals might dwell on what if scenarios.
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 2: They may try to negotiate or make deals to reverse
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 2: in lessen the loss. The fourth stage is depression. It
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 2: is profound sadness and regrets that can take hold of
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 2: you and take your reality as the loss began to
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 2: set in. This stage often involves with drownness, you stop
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 2: reflecting and you start reflecting on situations and you just
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 2: isolate yourself. The fifth stage is acceptance. This is supposedly
• 1:20:15
  Speaker 2: the final stage. It involves coming to terms with the loss.
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 2: While the pain may not fully disappear, individuals find ways
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 2: to move on to keep living. So, as you've heard
• 1:20:34
  Speaker 2: the five stages, we know that we all go through
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 2: these five stages. We may go through them in different order.
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 2: We may even repeat some of the stages, and some
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 2: of them we may skip all together. But it's okay
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 2: to feel how you feel, but just don't stay there
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 2: too long. So now it's come to the part of
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 2: the show. Well, I want you to be able to
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 2: stay connected with these amazing individuals that are more than host.
• 1:21:11
  Speaker 2: They have a lot going on and who knows it
• 1:21:15
  Speaker 2: may be able to help you through whatever you may
• 1:21:17
  Speaker 2: be going through. So I want them to share about
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 2: them as far as how you can reach them, how
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 2: you can stay connected with them on their platforms, all
• 1:21:28
  Speaker 2: social media platforms, things of that nature. And we're gonna
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 2: start with doctor Apostle, Kimberly your muted.
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 3: Good evening once again, as good evening once again. I
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 3: want to just share my contact information with everyone I
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 3: am on on social media as Kimberly Thomas, and I
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 3: can also be reached at eight five zero three two
• 1:22:12
  Speaker 3: two three six seven five. My email address is Daughter
• 1:22:19
  Speaker 3: of Destiny WVP at gmail dot com and I'm grateful
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 3: for the opportunity to be a part of the healing
• 1:22:32
  Speaker 3: voices as we navigate through grief.
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 4: And man Chanette, well, hello, it was a pleasure being
• 1:22:47
  Speaker 4: here on this evening. You can reach me at Cheanette
• 1:22:51
  Speaker 4: Johnson on Facebook, or you can go to linktree and
• 1:22:56
  Speaker 4: you can put in Chanette's voice and I will bring
• 1:23:00
  Speaker 4: up all my social platforms that I'm on. You can
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 4: reach me at by phone. You can reach me at
• 1:23:09
  Speaker 4: nine five one six six nine four four five zero.
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 2: And man Amen Trevida all right.
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 3: You can reach me on Facebook at Trevida Harris, Instagram
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 3: Trevita Underscore Harris seventy eight. Also Wings of Transformation at
• 1:23:41
  Speaker 3: rightemee dot com. Also Believe in the Journey at Gmail,
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 3: Believe in the Journey podcast at gmail dot com or
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 3: right If you are looking to write a book need
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 3: help doing that, you can call me. We can set
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 3: up a time eight six four three seven six ninety
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 3: two sixty.
• 1:24:01
  Speaker 2: One, man and Man and Miss Danielle Yes Ski.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 5: My name is Danielle Ross and I own Hope's Legacy
• 1:24:12
  Speaker 5: Grief Support, so you can find me on Instagram and
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 5: it's at Hope's Legacy Grief Support and does have an
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 5: s N O H O P S and then the
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 5: Legacy Grief Support and the number twenty four, and then
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 5: my email is it's moved forward c S at gmail
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 5: dot com, but it's minus the e, so it's m
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 5: O V F O R W A r D and
• 1:24:32
  Speaker 5: then cus in kat ss and Sam at gmail dot com.
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Thank you well. I'll tell you I have
• 1:24:40
  Speaker 2: truly truly enjoyed being in this space with all of
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 2: these amazing hosts. Shaneiya will be back on the next
• 1:24:49
  Speaker 2: show again. I am the visionary I am. I can
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 2: be reached on most social media platforms, but you can
• 1:24:59
  Speaker 2: go over to link tree. Queen of Collaborations. Google me, y'all,
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 2: google me. I tell everybody I like to say, google me,
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 2: Google me. And if you put in Queen of Collaborations,
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 2: I promise you I may pop up. But if you
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 2: put in Angela Thomas Smith, you could see all of
• 1:25:15
  Speaker 2: the amazing things I'm doing. But of course link Tree
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 2: has all of my links. If you go over to
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 2: Queen of Collaborations, check out some of my one hundred
• 1:25:26
  Speaker 2: and something books, new one dropping April first, my birthday.
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 2: Y'all got to give a shout out, especially to those
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 2: twenty amazing poets that decided to share. That was our
• 1:25:39
  Speaker 2: way of releasing. So yeah, I can be checked out.
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 2: Follow however you want to do it. Connect, I'm gonna
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 2: say connect. I don't like to say follow because I
• 1:25:50
  Speaker 2: like to connect. So if you want to connect with me,
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 2: go to link Tree, backslash, Queen of Collaborations and we
• 1:26:00
  Speaker 2: can connect. And I tell you you would probably be
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 2: amazed that some of the things that I do. But
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 2: we are a family. I have my hands in a
• 1:26:12
  Speaker 2: lot because I believe in helping individuals because I want
• 1:26:18
  Speaker 2: to be that change and change begins and ends with me,
• 1:26:22
  Speaker 2: and I tell everybody that come in my circle, it
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 2: begins and end with you. So hey, I'm grateful. I'm
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 2: thankful for this space. I hope that it would be
• 1:26:33
  Speaker 2: a space where you're comfortable those that are tuning in,
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 2: where you can get what you need. Also know that
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 2: you can call in if you need help and there
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 2: is no one around and you need someone to talk to,
• 1:26:51
  Speaker 2: there is a nine eight mental health crisis line that
• 1:26:56
  Speaker 2: you can call, just like you call now on one
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 2: nine eight eight, and there's someone on the other side
• 1:27:05
  Speaker 2: of that line that can assist you with any type
• 1:27:09
  Speaker 2: of mental health crisis, whether it's grief, depression, you may
• 1:27:14
  Speaker 2: be feeling suicidal, whatever it may be. We want you
• 1:27:17
  Speaker 2: to know that there's someone on the other side of
• 1:27:20
  Speaker 2: that line nine at eight that can assist you. Again,
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 2: I'm grateful, I thank you, guys, and I hope that
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 2: you have a nugget that you can take away and imply,
• 1:27:33
  Speaker 2: because the word say, once you come into the knowledge
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 2: of some things, then you are responsible for those things.
• 1:27:40
  Speaker 2: So y'all, I hope that you have some resources that
• 1:27:44
  Speaker 2: you can apply to your life. So always imparton. Y'all know.
• 1:27:49
  Speaker 2: I love to encourage, I love to inspire, So y'all,
• 1:27:54
  Speaker 2: it's gonna be a minute before we're back, So I
• 1:27:57
  Speaker 2: want you to leave some them with the listing audience
• 1:28:02
  Speaker 2: that will keep them going, that would inspire them until
• 1:28:06
  Speaker 2: we're back here in June, right June. So we're gonna
• 1:28:13
  Speaker 2: start with Shanette, then Apostle, then Trevita, and then we're
• 1:28:20
  Speaker 2: gonna end with Danielle.
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 4: Okay, I want to leave this with you guys when
• 1:28:31
  Speaker 4: you're if you, like Angela said, if you are a
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 4: suicide or anything, reach out for help. Reach for help.
• 1:28:42
  Speaker 4: That's the most important thing. Always get help. If you
• 1:28:46
  Speaker 4: need someone to talk to. I gave you my number.
• 1:28:50
  Speaker 4: You can reach out to me and I'll listen to you.
• 1:28:55
  Speaker 4: Right get out and let the sun hit you, shine
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 4: on your face. Remember that, remember your loved one as
• 1:29:08
  Speaker 4: when it was here. Don't stay in that dark place
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 4: too long, and always pray and give God the glory.
• 1:29:28
  Speaker 3: I would like to leave with the listening audience the
• 1:29:34
  Speaker 3: fact that I pray that you would be encouraged and
• 1:29:38
  Speaker 3: know that there is help. There's always help that is available.
• 1:29:43
  Speaker 3: There's always hope. No matter where you may find yourself
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 3: along this journey, just know that there is hope and
• 1:29:51
  Speaker 3: there is help out here for you. Please do not
• 1:29:55
  Speaker 3: feel that you are in this journey alone. Know that
• 1:29:59
  Speaker 3: you never walk up alone. There is a voice of reasoning,
• 1:30:04
  Speaker 3: there's a voice of hope, and there is love and compassion.
• 1:30:08
  Speaker 3: That's one of the things that I believe that a
• 1:30:11
  Speaker 3: lot of times we just need a listening ear, someone
• 1:30:14
  Speaker 3: to have that love, someone to have that compassion for us,
• 1:30:18
  Speaker 3: and to share a moment of hope, to let us
• 1:30:22
  Speaker 3: know that this is not the end of our journey.
• 1:30:25
  Speaker 3: We can make it through whatever it is that we
• 1:30:28
  Speaker 3: are going through, and that we are not journeying alone.
• 1:30:33
  Speaker 3: It is my prayer that each and every individual that
• 1:30:36
  Speaker 3: is in this process of grief, that you will find
• 1:30:40
  Speaker 3: your place in God and that you will understand that
• 1:30:46
  Speaker 3: no matter what is happening in your life, that you
• 1:30:49
  Speaker 3: can come out on the other side victorious, healed, and hole.
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 1: Uness.
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 5: Danane, Yes, one thing I know that really helps. I
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 5: know the Bible is huge, and my thing is just
• 1:31:14
  Speaker 5: turning to God's word. One thing that just helps me
• 1:31:16
  Speaker 5: is just turning to versus a offer encouragement or mindus
• 1:31:19
  Speaker 5: of God's comfort. So like I have Psalms thirty four eighteen,
• 1:31:23
  Speaker 5: Revelations twenty one four and tewod Corinthians one three through four,
• 1:31:27
  Speaker 5: and there's so many other Bible verses, but holding onto
• 1:31:29
  Speaker 5: those and in times of need and as many of
• 1:31:32
  Speaker 5: those you know, the co host of stated feel free
• 1:31:35
  Speaker 5: to reach out to us even if you feel like, oh,
• 1:31:38
  Speaker 5: they're not going to want to listen, they don't know me,
• 1:31:40
  Speaker 5: but just know that we're here. I used to working
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 5: with people that are single and going through grief or
• 1:31:45
  Speaker 5: just grieving their season of singleness. So we're here to
• 1:31:48
  Speaker 5: just reach out, to listen, to help you, and just
• 1:31:50
  Speaker 5: to let you know you're not alone.
• 1:31:54
  Speaker 2: Amen, I think I'll skip Charvida Chareda's.
• 1:32:00
  Speaker 3: It's not worries. I'll still here. But I want everyone
• 1:32:04
  Speaker 3: to understand that you're not walking this journey alone. You
• 1:32:08
  Speaker 3: always have someone to lean on, someone to reach out to.
• 1:32:13
  Speaker 3: It may seem lonely, but trust and believe you're never
• 1:32:16
  Speaker 3: alone if you allow someone in that space to help
• 1:32:20
  Speaker 3: you get through and understand that grief is a moment
• 1:32:23
  Speaker 3: by moment adjustment. It's not a season that you're going
• 1:32:27
  Speaker 3: to go through this. So when you know that it
• 1:32:29
  Speaker 3: is a daily, moment by moment adjustment, everything will be okay.
• 1:32:35
  Speaker 3: Continue to keep God included in this journey and you'll
• 1:32:39
  Speaker 3: make it through however it looks for you, because God
• 1:32:43
  Speaker 3: is faithful in his word that he will always be
• 1:32:47
  Speaker 3: with you no matter what it looks like. And even
• 1:32:50
  Speaker 3: if you feel like he's not listening. Understand that you
• 1:32:53
  Speaker 3: have to sometimes be silent to hear when God's speaking,
• 1:32:57
  Speaker 3: because when we're moving too fast, we don't always from him.
• 1:33:01
  Speaker 3: So be mindful of that. And one thing that I
• 1:33:04
  Speaker 3: always say is that stay out of God's business and
• 1:33:07
  Speaker 3: just be obedient to what he's calling you to do,
• 1:33:10
  Speaker 3: because when you're obedient to what God is calling you
• 1:33:13
  Speaker 3: to do, you're never off track and you're never of.
• 1:33:15
  Speaker 2: Course, amen, amen, Amen, And I second everything that they
• 1:33:23
  Speaker 2: have said, because they have dropped some positive notes, some
• 1:33:27
  Speaker 2: things that would definitely keep you going, some things that
• 1:33:30
  Speaker 2: will help you until we come back in June. So
• 1:33:34
  Speaker 2: I hope you guys are encouraged. Make sure if you
• 1:33:38
  Speaker 2: need help nine A pick up your phone, call somebody,
• 1:33:42
  Speaker 2: get help. If you have a friend that you can
• 1:33:45
  Speaker 2: call that you trust that will be a listening here,
• 1:33:48
  Speaker 2: call them and talk to them. Do not hurt alone,
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 2: because you do not have to hurt in silence. We're here,
• 1:33:57
  Speaker 2: We're here to help, and if you need call us,
• 1:34:01
  Speaker 2: you can call me four all four three three eight
• 1:34:03
  Speaker 2: eight sixty five two And all of myself is we're
• 1:34:08
  Speaker 2: listed and we are here. So know that you have
• 1:34:11
  Speaker 2: this space. We want you to heal because heal people.
• 1:34:16
  Speaker 2: Just like they say, hurt people, hurt people. Heal people
• 1:34:21
  Speaker 2: help heal other people. So we're trying to heal so
• 1:34:26
  Speaker 2: that we can help you heal. So let's journey this
• 1:34:29
  Speaker 2: together and become heal people so that we can heal.
• 1:34:34
  Speaker 2: Until next time, y'all, be blessed, Stay connected, stay connected,
• 1:34:38
  Speaker 2: stay connected, Know that we are here. We love you guys,
• 1:34:42
  Speaker 2: and we want you to be healed because we want
• 1:34:46
  Speaker 2: you to walk in your purpose. Until next time. Goodbye,
• 1:35:01
  Speaker 2: assass