Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 4 - Episode 88 - How do you choose who gives you advice?

Transcript

Season 4 - Episode 88 - How do you choose who gives you advice? · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

• 0:01
  Hey everybody, welcome to the good morning from the Chicken
• 0:04
  Coop podcast. My name is Kim Johnson and I am
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  a mastermindset coach, creative strategist and also happened to
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  be a farmer. This is my chicken coop and I
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  come out here every. Day to record a podcast to.
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  Teach distinctions, possibilities, new ways of
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  thinking, and just bring some. Joy into the world, so welcome
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  to the. Coop and let's start your day
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  off in a fantastic way. Hey everybody, good morning.
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  So let's talk about how we pick people that we listen to and
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  take advice from. This is a very interesting
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  subject to me, always has been based on the fact that obviously
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  I coach. So a lot of people come and talk
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  to me and want to know, OK, what should I do?
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  And let me be the first one to say I do not say what you should
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  do. I never tell my clients what
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  they should do. I give them ideas and they can
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  choose. That's why I refer to myself as
• 1:00
  a creative strategist as well as an executive mindset coach.
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  I can tell them what will change their mindset and they can pick
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  and choose working on that. And I tell them, well, here are
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  some possibilities, here are some pathways and lay it out in
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  front of everybody so that they can choose which one feels right
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  for them because ultimately we are all responsible for
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  ourselves. But here's the tricky part.
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  When we start looking for people to talk to, often it's it's in
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  our, in our inner circle, Like we just look at what's what is
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  around us in proximity and we'll start asking other people and
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  we'll say, Hey, do you know anybody that dot dot, dot, dot
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  dot? And it while that's can be a
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  good thing, the challenge we have is how are we delineating
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  if in fact we should take that person's advice, not the one
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  that's giving it to us, but the one they're sending us to.
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  How do we know that person is of quality?
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  How do we know what's there? And I've heard it said that, you
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  know, oh, well, you can see the success that person has had.
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  But having been working in the speaker industry for a very long
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  time, I've seen speakers come and go, and I've seen them have
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  great, you know, stature of wealth.
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  And behind the scenes, they're a nightmare.
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  I've seen people who you think look so together on stage and
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  then they come off and they're totally not together.
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  And that has always made me leery of how do you sort?
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  How do you see? Because it depends on what
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  you're measuring, how you want to pick somebody.
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  So for instance, if you want someone to give you advice in
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  business and they never talk about their failures, I struggle
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  with that personally. Like I want to know where
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  somebody failed. I want to see what happened with
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  that failure. My father used to talk about
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  that all the time. He had multiple businesses and
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  he was very successful with car washes and he was, he opened a
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  shoe store, rather random, right?
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  This is when I was in high school and opened a shoe store
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  and really had the intent of wanting my mother to take that
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  business on. Well, my mother did not want to
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  take that business on. Talk about misaligned goals.
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  She had no intention of it. So we ran it for a few years and
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  then we closed it because it just didn't make any sense.
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  And he would talk about that. He would say those things to me
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  and be like, I didn't anticipate what she thought of this.
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  I didn't anticipate that she wouldn't be interested in
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  leaving the job she had. But because she was so certainty
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  driven, she didn't want to leave where she was working, which
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  happened to be Texas Instruments.
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  And he wanted to get her out of that environment, put her in
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  something where she could be an entrepreneur like he, him and
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  his whole family had always been.
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  But it didn't work. But I loved that he talked about
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  that. So when you go and you start
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  thinking about, and he's, and he would willingly say what, you
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  know, what went wrong? And the failures that I have had
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  over time where I was like, oh, yes, I, I, I got a patent on
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  that product and yes, it did not work.
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  I could not get it sold. It was at a wonky time in the
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  world. I could not figure out how to
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  get it sold. It was just you.
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  You couldn't get any traction anywhere.
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  I have no problem going back and learning from the failures, so
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  to speak, because they are so rich.
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  I don't want somebody that's just going to talk about all of
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  the stuff that is great in their world.
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  I've heard it said that you can also check on somebody by their
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  credit score. Now this really interesting to
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  me because I think some how you handle yourself in all areas of
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  your life matter and the credit score is a huge 1.
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  And I'm proud to say that I worked my butt off to get my
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  credit score to an 850. Like yes, I have an 850.
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  It's attainable. I wanted to know how do I get
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  there? And I worked and worked and
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  worked and it took me like 5 years to get over that hump.
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  I was at 800 couldn't get over the hump.
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  But I but prior to that when I got divorced, my credit score
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  was in the toilet. It was in the low 6 hundreds,
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  and I had to work it all the way back up.
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  But guess what? I did it and I'm proud of that.
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  And I say, oh, you know, having a vision of a credit score,
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  yeah, that's really good to know from somebody, hey, what's your
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  credit score? You can ask somebody what their
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  company is worth. You can do all these things, but
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  ultimately it's how they behave and how they handle their
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  language when they speak to you. What are they doing?
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  How are they treating you? Are they asking you questions to
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  then give you possibilities or are they just jamming things
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  down your throat and saying what you have to do?
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  Because in my world, in my circle, that does not work.
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  And that often leads to you feeling like you have to take on
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  the responsibility. If you pick something that they
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  they told you to go do it and you do it because you believe in
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  them, then you feel worse because you've made another bad
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  choice if it doesn't work out. So be very strategic when you're
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  picking and listening and when you've got a big issue that
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  you're trying to sort out, the best thing you can do is put it
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  on paper. Draw that line right down the
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  middle. The pros, the cons, because your
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  brain loves that stuff. Pluses and minuses.
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  It works every single time. And always, always give yourself
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  the time to process the character of the people you're
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  listening to, as well as those other things that we talked
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  about, like the credit score and all that stuff.
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  Sure, but we don't really go around asking people their
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  credit score, although maybe we should.
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  Anyway, I hope this is helpful. My friends and I will see you
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  all tomorrow. Have a blessed day, bye.