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All American Running Back Stumbles But Rises Again: The Stephen Barbee Story · Nightmare Success In and Out

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What happens when your worst fear becomes your reality?
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Hi, I'm Brent Cassidy, welcome to the Nightmare Success in our
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podcast where we explore how to overcome your fears and
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nightmares and set yourself free.
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We're going to be exploring this topic with guys that was in love
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and work with and others who survived their own nightmare.
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These stories can be inspiring, sometimes sad.
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There's some humor and hopefully you can come away with a nugget
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of something that'll help you knock down some of the prisons
0:29
you built up in your own mind. All right, welcome back nine
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more success listeners. Welcome, welcome, welcome.
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You know, this is where you come from.
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What happens when your worst fear becomes your reality?
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How do you adapt, survive, overcome, set yourself free and
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don't forget to follow, subscribe, share, like, comment
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all that good stuff helps the show.
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OK, folks, I I've got kind of great guest here and I went to
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his website. I thought it just like stuck out
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at me and said Stevens life story is one of dreams,
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destruction, disgrace and deliverance.
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Wow, it's pretty powerful. If you if you tell you a little
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bit about Steven he he is earlier years were filled with
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promises. He came from a lovely family.
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His dad was a pastor and man, this guy could play some
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football when he was in college. He's a running back and it was
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he got all American honors as a running back.
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LED junior all junior colleges for all-purpose yards in 1984
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season, averaging 177 yards per game.
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I don't know if anybody knows about football, but that's a lot
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of yards per game. That's that's like two games and
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one game. That's, that's, that's picking
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them up and put them down. But Stephen, he fell on, he was,
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he was always struggling with two paths.
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He had this great, you know, talent for athleticism and
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football, but he struggled with addiction.
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And, you know, eventually he, he fell into addiction and
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homeless, went homeless and finally found himself looking
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and staring at a 70 month federal sentence.
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He's going to tell us about all that.
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But when he got out, man, this guy hit the ground running.
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He isn't running back. He's now a nationally recognized
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speaker, mentor, life coach. He has over 20 years of
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experience serving the homeless and the reentry population as a
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case manager, caseworker, outreach worker, mentor, life
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coach, and a group facilitator throughout the United States.
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So I can't wait to jump in and unpack all this.
2:38
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Auto Plaza direct. Tell him Brent from nightmare
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success sent you Steven Barbie. Welcome in my man.
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How are you doing? Man, I'm doing great.
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Brent, I tell you just I want to say first of all, thank you for
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an opportunity to be on nightmare success in and out
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show and just you know how we connected and you know we
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pressed on through, but I just want to say thank you to you and
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just allow me this platform and then to your sponsors.
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Well, I appreciate that, Steven. And you know, I got to tell you,
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you, you, it's funny before we ever got you never know what
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happens before the show. Steve and I are trying to figure
3:51
out Riverside FM has this, this crazy thing where you have to
3:55
download Google Chrome. And between us as a partnership,
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we figured this out. We're here, we got it, we got
4:03
it, we got it downloaded. We got Riverside FM going.
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Stevens not on his phone, he's on his computer.
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We're all good. Yes, we are most definitely, you
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know. IA step at a time, right man?
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It is barriers, right? It's like, you know, there's a
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lot of roadblocks, but I think it is there's the reason why
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that that through this opportunity, someone needs to
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hear this story. And so I'm very honored to have
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this opportunity to share this afternoon.
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I'm excited about it. Let's jump into it because you
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know, it is an interesting headline, Steven, when you look
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at your website because it does grab your attention.
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Dreams, Destruction, disgrace delivers the DS and and you live
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through all that. Can you kind of bring us back
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into that Steven Barbie world growing up?
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Sure I tell you just being brought up in a in a good
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Christian home. My dad was a pastor still is in
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fact my dad is 86 years old still preaching.
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My mother was an educator before she passed away 2005.
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But the uniqueness of, of my family and the upbringing
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because of my daddy's ministry and, and different occupations
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and churches when I was born in Joplin, MO, I tell people, you
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know, I left at the age of three, We moved to Wichita
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Falls, TX and if somebody came to me right now and said, Steve,
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we'll give you $1,000,000. If you could find that Red House
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next to the woods, I wouldn't remember where that house.
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That's all I remember about Joplin.
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But going to Texas, you know, and, and the uniqueness of, of
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the big state of Texas and everything in Texas is huge.
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I have a older sister, a older brother.
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We all was born in Missouri. Then my three younger siblings
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were born in Texas, you know, sports, sports, sports.
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You know, I remember at the early age of eight just being
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introduced to sports and playing football.
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I'm talking about full contact sports at the age of eight.
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And that really got me into the attitude of playing sports, of
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being successful. You know, that's that's when my
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dreams began at a very young age, But I did not like to lose
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and and of course, because of my dad's occupation of the pastor
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and and then being led to a a church hearing in the Lawrence,
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KS. We did stop shortly in Kansas
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City. He didn't get the church and and
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that in fact, was the first time I've never played football at
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the age of 11. So we moved to Lawrence, KS and
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because of Texas and, and, and their sports, me and my brother
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were so far ahead of the other kids athletic wise when it came
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to football, baseball, basketball.
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And just that, that drive to win, you know, and that drive to
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say, you know what if I'm down at halftime, I know how to
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regroup and, and to come out and have a better second-half
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playing football and. That's like a life lesson there.
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Yeah, yeah, playing football and playing baseball there in
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Lawrence, KS was Lawrence High School back in the day was one
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of the big powerhouses here in the state of Kansas.
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We used to average 120 a 150 kids out for football.
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And so you had to be good to start and, and I was very good
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and very talented. Played football was a Sunflower
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League as a wide receiver and a flanker.
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Well I signed with Independence Community College there in
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Independence, KS and that was in February.
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I said I'm going to Independence.
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Well between February and and July I was back on the baseball
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field and playing baseball and having a very exceptional senior
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year where I was lead off hitter, hit 475 with ten home
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runs and and a coach came and recruited me, coach Carl
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Heinrich from Highland Community College and signed me on the
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spot after the game. And so here I am, you know, my
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dream, you know, a baseball scholarship going to school.
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And it, it was just great. But the downside of it is, is by
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this time I started drinking alcohol.
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You, you know, that, that, that grip of addiction, you know, at
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that age, it was fun. You know, let's, let's, let's,
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let's, let's, let's have fun, right?
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And, and that fun, it was still there, but because of my
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indulgence into alcohol. And by this time I had graduated
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to start smoking marijuana. My very first semester in school
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lost my baseball scholarship. You know, junior colleges.
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All you needed was a 1.58 GPA and I had a 1.43.
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And I never forget, you know, my dreams and now the disgrace,
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right? And, and here I am without a
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scholarship. And I begin to call other
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coaches in between that semester and, you know, saying Hyla is
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not a good fit. And, you know, and, and, but I
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wasn't telling them the truth, right?
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I didn't shout out. That flunked out.
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And I never forget. I'm not for sure what school I
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had made contact with. I made a phone call and I heard
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the double click, of course, just before cell phones and
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landline phones, my dad was listening in on my phone
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conversation. My dad called me upstairs.
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They said, son, I tell you what you're going to do.
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You're going back to Highland. You're going to face your
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teammates, your classmates, your roommates, because not only did
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you fail yourself, but you failed them.
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And so I went back to Highland. Of course I.
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Got to ask you, Steven. I got to ask you what?
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Because your world growing up, yeah.
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What was it like being the kid, the pastor's son?
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Was that an extra thing that you had to work with or how did that
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work? Well, it's, you know, I always
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said I had a mistaken identity, right?
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You know, I was always known in Lawrence as Pastor Barbie's son
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or Miss Ann's son, right? The stigma, they call it peak
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PK, you know, pastor's kids, You know, I said, we graduated now
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we're TOS that we're theologian offsprings, you know, and so,
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you know, six kids will run through the church and I'm the
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last one and they would say, do you see the pastor's kids?
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What about the other five that I was chasing, right?
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Or, or in the Christmas play and, and I stumble over my lines
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and say, Can you believe the pastor's son didn't even know
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his lines? And so just that whole stigma,
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that whole been underneath the microscope and, and everything
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that we did was watched and monitored and everything.
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And so just having that other label, right, you know, now
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Pastor Barbie son, now the athlete, right, but now the
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athlete that's not playing ball. And so that semester I went back
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and I never forget my baseball coach, Carl Heinrich.
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He met me at my dorm and and he said, I want to show you a place
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on campus. I think you don't know.
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We haven't. He walked me across the street.
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Brandon walked me into the library.
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If you know people that comes to the library, they study and
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people that study stays eligible.
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And so that particular semester I couldn't play baseball in the
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spring. And so I said, well, let me just
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walk into the football team just to stay in shape.
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Well, I got football fever again and my GPA skyrocket to a 3.2.
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Got my scholarship back for that next season.
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Football. We were checking in and tailback
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from California was our tailback because I was playing flanker at
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the time and he blew his knee out first game.
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And then our second team tailback from Topeka, KS, he
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finished the first game, the 2nd and then he quite wasn't getting
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the job done. You know, and I always share
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with people, get people around you that season you what you
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don't see in yourself. And my coach, he called me
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upstairs and and he says, you know, would you consider
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switching from flanker to running back?
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He said, you play running back in high school.
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And I said yeah. And I made the switch.
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And, you know, you said it in the intro.
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But that 278 yards that I had on 29 carries was my very first
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game as a tailback. And of course, coach left me
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there. And, you know, I am proud to say
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that that record still stands today.
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You know, from 1983 to 2024 that that record still stands.
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I still have, yeah. I still have probably about 8 or
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10 records where I'm in the top five or top six at at Highland
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Community College. So here I am now.
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I'm excelling in the football field, but yet that that now the
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party is really picking up, right, because, you know, I'm,
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I'm the the big guy on campus, right on, you know, partying and
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and drinking and and hanging out, you know, and, and as long
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as my grades was eligible, you know, the coach kind of looked
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the other way. But now the blackouts begin to
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happen. You know, now you know, the,
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the, you know, do you know what you did last night?
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Stories come and and because I was being so successful in the
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football field, I could care less about what people were
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saying. But eventually, you know, we
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that second year at Highland, of course you read it.
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You know, I led the nation all-purpose running and I'm
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getting, you know, recruitment letter from Stanford University,
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Western University. I got one from Hawaii, Montana
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State, just to name a few. These schools found Steven
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Barbie in Highland and started recruiting me.
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And, you know, next thing you know, I didn't realize how good
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I really was, to be honest with you.
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And so I took the very first full ride scholarship offer
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there at Peru State College in Nebraska, went there.
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Of course, now I, I graduated, right.
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I went from drinking alcohol to smoking marijuana.
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And now, you know, power cocaine was, was readily available.
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I was on steroids. You know, the just just living
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a, a loose life. You know, I tell people it's
13:38
kind of sad that my four years in school, I only went to church
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twice. You know, my, my, my Family
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Foundation of going to church. It wasn't even a thought for me
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to go. And so as I go to Peru State
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and, and playing football and, and begin to excel and, and, you
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know, it was in between semesters there that I came home
14:02
here in Lawrence, working at the warehouse in the best physical
14:06
shape I've ever been in. And I never forget it was July
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of that year and me and my cowork had worked long hours and
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back then we got off work and and there's a bar in Lawrence,
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KS called Johnny's Tavern which opened at 7:00 AM.
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And so we went straight to the bar.
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That's an early time for a for. A bar, Yeah.
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And we went there. Of course, back then you could
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cash your payroll checks. And we did.
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And we started drinking and we was on his motorcycle, Brent.
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And so he said, man, Barb, if we stay on this thing, we're going
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to die. And eventually went and rented a
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old customized van and loaded it up with alcohol and and the
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drugs. I'm just driving around
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Lawrence, just partying it up. Well, I was, you know, I never
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was a social drinker. I drank to get drunk.
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You know, I always went hard. And so eventually my friend, he
15:02
said, man, I need to go home and rest.
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And I said, OK. And I got back in the van.
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And it was one of those moments, right?
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I hit a telephone pole going, as they say, 80 plus miles an hour.
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Lucky you didn't die. Yeah.
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And because of that, you know, even today is a constant
15:20
reminder. On my left arm, I have a battery
15:22
acid burn that starts here, and it goes all the way up.
15:25
And so at that particular time, I was two weeks away from
15:29
reporting for football, my head swollen and a bandage, and my
15:35
dad took me by the van. He said, I want to show you how
15:37
blessed you really are because I literally pushed the engine all
15:40
the way in and the battery acid dripped on me.
15:44
And so then I called my coach, a coach.
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You know, I'm down, depressed. I don't want to come back.
15:48
I can't come back. But I tell people, you know, God
15:51
has a sense of humor because my roommate from Blytheville, AR,
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his car breaks down going to two a days.
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And where does it break down at 3 miles outside of Lawrence, KS?
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My dad wakes me up and says go get Josh and like where is he's
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on the highway. So he comes in and Josh asked
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me. He said, hey Barbie, you think
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your dad would take him up to Peru?
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I said I don't know, ask him. And sure enough he asked my dad.
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He said I take you Sunday after church son.
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My dad calls everybody son. And Brett, if you had the
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opportunity to meet, my daddy's going to call you son.
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So it's just something my dad calls all young men.
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And we drove up to Peru and practice was going on and Josh
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gets out of the car and practice continue.
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Well, when I get out of the car, practice literally stops.
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Teammates run up saying, Barbie, man, we need you to come back.
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We need you to come back. And so me and Coach Adcox, we
16:44
took a walk to the other end of the field.
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He said, Barbie said if you back by next Sunday, you still have
16:50
your full right scholarship. And so of course, I got football
16:53
fever. The trainer made me a removable
16:57
cast, one that I could put on a take off daily because of the
17:00
open wound on my arm. And one week later I'm back on
17:03
campus and two weeks later is our first game.
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Coach says, Barbara, I can't start you.
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You missed 2A days. And so in my mind, I didn't
17:13
think I was going to get to play.
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But he said I wasn't going to start you on offense because I
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was a return specialist by return kickoff.
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He allowed me to do the opening kickoff.
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I went to the sideline, didn't play the whole first quarter.
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First play in the second quarter, he's calling me and
17:27
Brent, I go option and I break one for like 64 yards.
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I'm like, man, I'm great to have a great game.
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Rest of the game I'm in and out. Second game I'm playing more.
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And finally, the third game, he says you're ready to start.
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And I'll never forget we were playing Concordia College out of
17:45
Nebraska. First game starting, I would had
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69 yards at the end of the first quarter.
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I'm saying I'm going to have a blowout game.
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I'm getting ready to have another 278 in the second
17:57
quarter. I tore the ligaments in my ankle
18:00
and was out. Of course, you know, how do I
18:03
deal with pain with the powder cocaine, right?
18:07
The the partying, the getting high and eventually, you know,
18:11
because of that road of addiction to begin to grow and
18:14
grow as we move into this. I'm wondering, Steven, you're
18:18
talking about this, did did you have other teammates that you
18:23
were doing this with or were you having your team as one lane and
18:27
that you were living this addiction lane on the other
18:31
side? You know, it, it was all, it was
18:34
teammates. Yeah, you know, it was
18:36
teammates. You know, it, it, it was staff,
18:40
you know, that, that, that you know, had had the house off
18:43
campus and, and as long as what goes on in, in the professor's
18:48
house and, and the head cuts house and stayed in the house
18:50
and, and eventually, you know, it spiraled out of control.
18:56
Still to this day. It was two weeks before the
18:59
semester ended in May. The campus police comes up to my
19:04
room, wakes me up and he says you need to get down to the
19:07
Dean's office. I'm like, well, why?
19:09
He said, you need to get there immediately.
19:11
So I get up hungover and the ultimatum was this here, either
19:16
we press charges or we're going to kick you out of school.
19:20
And I said, what kicked me out of school?
19:23
You're talking about destruction and disgrace.
19:25
Now a four ride scholarship gone.
19:29
You know, I begged them. I said can I at least stay to
19:31
the end of the semester? He said no.
19:33
And so I come back to Lawrence, KS.
19:36
My dad knew something was wrong because I come home on a Sunday
19:39
night. Usually I'm going back to school
19:42
on a Sunday morning. And so here I am down and just
19:48
depressed. And now what you know, I, I was
19:51
always able to bounce back. You know, I always had a dream,
19:56
you know, to to coach football, coach college football, and I
19:59
had that opportunity. There in Lawrence, KS, there is
20:03
a high school, Indian Nation University.
20:07
Yeah, back then it was high school, junior college.
20:09
While I was able to get hired on as they're a running back coach
20:13
and they had a 33 game losing streak.
20:17
We end up having a six and four record.
20:19
We end up having to win in season.
20:21
But by this time I'm in, I'm just out of control, drinking,
20:24
getting high, hanging out with the players, partying with the
20:27
students. And one particular night, I
20:29
snuck two of our star players back into the dorm.
20:33
And one of the assistant coach saw my car driving off campus.
20:37
And he reported to that director and a head coach.
20:40
And they told me I need to resign.
20:42
And so now here it is in 8687, just like now.
20:47
What? Right?
20:48
You know, all of these choices that had consequences while I
20:53
was dating a young lady, She went to University of Kansas,
20:57
wants some Chicago. She said, why don't you move to
20:58
Chicago, get a fresh start, you know, get out of Lawrence,
21:01
right? And I did.
21:03
But realizing one thing about addiction, I tell people, for
21:07
me, when I hear change, people placing in things, it's not that
21:12
a drug addict can find drugs in the middle of nowhere, you know?
21:17
And I realize now that I was carrying my active addiction
21:21
from Kansas to Chicago. Eventually that relationship
21:25
fizzled out. Eventually, by this time, crack
21:28
cocaine is is huge. I'm an addict that's been
21:32
delivered. But anything that would get my
21:36
mind to a high state, I was indulging.
21:39
And here I am now smoking crack cocaine.
21:43
Finally, I found myself homeless.
21:46
What happened with the girl that you moved up to Chicago with,
21:49
Did that fizzle out in the whole it's of everything that was
21:53
going on? Yeah, it fizzled out.
21:55
You know. You know, when you begin to love
21:58
the alcohol more than relationships, you know, and,
22:01
and so it fizzled out. Now I'm homeless and fixed.
22:05
Homeless. Let's talk about that, though,
22:07
Steven, because that's such a, that's such a heavy big deal.
22:11
I mean, obviously addiction's a big deal, you know, alcoholism's
22:16
a big deal, all those things. But to actually end up in a
22:18
situation to where you're finding yourself homeless, what,
22:22
what was going through your mind when that moment was happening
22:25
that you were, I guess that have to be rock bottom, right?
22:30
At that point in my life, that was rock bottom.
22:34
I never forget. I went to a food pantry there in
22:37
Oak Park, IL, it's right next to Chicago and, and walked his food
22:41
pantry and all they had on the shelf was a box of dried
22:46
Cheerios. That was it.
22:49
Everything else, the, the, the, the shelves were bare.
22:51
And I said, Sir, that's all we have.
22:53
I was hungry. I took the box of Cheerios.
22:57
And for two days, I literally just ate Cheerios, walked around
23:02
Oak Park, walked in, you know, slept in dugouts in the
23:06
different parks, slept underneath some park benches.
23:10
And finally, it was late one night and I saw a light on at a
23:14
nursing home. And I went and knocked on the
23:16
door. And the old elder lady came and
23:20
said, could I help? I said, miss, I'm hungry.
23:23
And so she closes the door and she comes back with a Coca-Cola
23:26
and a peanut butter and Jelly sandwich.
23:27
I'm sitting there on the porch. I'm eating, right?
23:29
And about this time, 2 police cars come up.
23:32
And I'm like, you know, Sir, I haven't done nothing.
23:35
I was just hungry. This lady gave me food and so he
23:38
told me to get in his vehicle. But I believe that, you know,
23:41
sometimes God brings angels into your life, right?
23:44
He told me he gets in his car and take me to the bus stop.
23:47
The public transportation there in Chicago, which now I know
23:50
it's Madison Ave. and he talked to the bus driver.
23:54
It's about 1:00 in the morning and the bus driver gave me a
23:58
free ride downtown to State Street.
24:01
And he just said One Direction. He just said son.
24:04
He said walk till you see the cross.
24:06
And I literally walked into Pacific Garden Mission.
24:08
Pacific Garden Mission, of course, one of the largest
24:11
rescue missions in the country. I walked in, slept for a couple
24:15
of hours, had to get up and went over to Lake MI and lay between
24:20
two boats, went back to the mission.
24:23
And you know, that was when I rededicated my life to the Lord.
24:26
I had a discipleship program. I joined the program just begin
24:32
to love me again, you know, and, and, and I love me.
24:36
Met a young lady one night in August on the street we had to
24:40
do St. evangelism gave her some gospel literature. 10 months
24:44
later she became my wife. You know, and out of that
24:48
marriage, two beautiful kids went back to school.
24:52
Finally got my degree from Trinity International University
24:55
and communication affordable ministry, you know, doing what
24:59
I'd love to do, helping people right.
25:02
What eventually me and my children's mother, you know,
25:05
sometimes you look at a person and you say who are you?
25:08
You know, we were so career driven minded.
25:11
You know, let's do the career. Had our kids in private school
25:14
that we literally grew apart. Now, mind you, at this time ran
25:19
into the listeners. I had 10 years of being clean
25:21
and sober. Wow.
25:23
I was off the crack, off the alcohol.
25:26
I meant, you know, living the life.
25:29
Well, one day she. Was it hard, was it hard for
25:32
you, Steven, to get off the and go clean and sober?
25:35
Did you struggle with that or was it just something you went
25:38
straight out into a new path and had new things going on and just
25:42
that was it? Yeah, yeah, got it.
25:44
Yeah, You know, it's kind of like being that running back,
25:47
right? Just just shaking the the the DB
25:49
one last time. And the thing of it is, is that
25:54
she left and I'm working on my master's degree.
25:57
And this is when we had, you know, answering machines.
26:01
I would come home and hit and no messages.
26:03
I said, at least you would let my kids say, you know, Dad, dad,
26:06
we miss you. And so about two or three weeks.
26:09
And so one night, man, I, I, I hear a old familiar voice and it
26:14
says, you haven't had a beer in 10 years.
26:20
And I said, look around. I said, you know, you're sure,
26:24
right? And so that particular night, I
26:26
went to the liquor store and I bought me a 40 oz.
26:29
Didn't think nothing of it. And then the next week,
26:31
Wednesday, went to class. But this time, being an addict,
26:34
I don't open it. Active addiction open, right?
26:37
I went to the liquor store and bought me 240 oz.
26:40
And then that old voice came and says, you haven't had to hit a
26:43
crack in over 10 years. Look around, I said, you sure,
26:47
right? And that particular night there
26:49
in Chicago, of course, inner city crack on every other corner
26:53
I found crack and then I'm smoking over $700.00 that night
26:58
clearly opened the door of active addiction, literally.
27:03
And because of an addict, you know, you try to cover it up
27:06
right. And, and all of a sudden, you
27:08
know, I used to get high on on Friday and, and smoke all night
27:12
Friday and, and don't smoke on Saturday and recuperate Sunday
27:15
and back at work within Friday became Thursday, Thursday became
27:19
Wednesday. And then all, of course, all the
27:21
live, my car broke down, you know, cell phone dead and all
27:25
that. Well, eventually I sold our home
27:28
back to the real estate and moved back to Kansas, not
27:32
realizing that my mother had been diagnosed with cancer.
27:36
And so this around 2002. And so from 2002 to 2005, while
27:42
I'm back in the Midwest, my MO grant was real simple Church,
27:50
celebrate clean time. Go out and celebrate clean time.
27:54
That's, that's the sickness of the disease, right?
27:57
Go out and celebrate. Now all of a sudden I'm not
27:59
clean, right? So now I'm something I'm
28:00
homeless again. So my MO was always homelessness
28:04
treatment, church, addiction, homelessness treatment,
28:12
addiction church. And that was my MO from 2002.
28:17
I'm. Curious Steven with your dad
28:21
because he seems like he was a big part of of always kind of
28:25
the guy that was sitting on your shoulder with the the advice and
28:28
whatever. How was he in your life at this
28:31
time period? You know, my father, he hasn't
28:35
changed. He, he, he didn't condone my
28:39
active addiction. He didn't condone and, and you
28:42
know, he, he wasn't in the stands saying rah, rah.
28:46
You know, it was a heavy burden for him and my mother, you know,
28:50
I try to cover it up, but you know, an addict, you know,
28:53
eventually get to to that state of I don't care.
28:57
And so because of that and because of my active addiction,
29:01
I I found a a very active crack drug house in Lawrence.
29:08
And you know, you can go there at 2:00 in the morning, 2:00 in
29:11
the afternoon seven. They always had it.
29:14
Always. Well, I never forget.
29:17
It was July 20th of 2005 and I went to this particular location
29:23
and knocked on the door. Nobody answered.
29:27
Nobody answered, which was unusual.
29:29
So I go back two days later, July 22nd, 2005, I knocked on
29:36
the door. And I always say this when I
29:39
share some of my story. 3 minutes 180 seconds changed my
29:44
life forever because I went into this particular location
29:48
purchased $100 worth of crack cocaine didn't think nothing of
29:52
it. That was July my mom passed in
29:56
August and so from August of 2005 is back and forth still
30:02
active addiction, homelessness and that my old MO.
30:06
Well, I'm in Topeka, KS and church working supervisor at
30:09
this particular job. And one day, December 20, 1st of
30:13
2007, two gentlemen walked in on my job and they called me back
30:18
down and said, Mr. Barbie, you got two gentlemen here that's
30:20
asking for you. So I go downstairs and they say
30:22
you're Steven Barbie. And I said yeah.
30:24
And they said you're under arrest.
30:27
I said for what? They said for five kills of
30:30
crack cocaine, I looked, I said you got the wrong person.
30:34
And Brent, they take a photo and they held it in front of us.
30:37
Is this you? And I said, yeah, that's me.
30:40
So I got arrested. You know, I wasn't a big time
30:45
drug dealer. I was just a street user, a
30:47
hustler, you know, never was one to walk around with guns and all
30:52
that. And so when they said that, I
30:55
was kind of surprised. And so as we left Topeka, coming
31:00
through Lawrence, I said, can I at least call my dad, you know,
31:02
because in the midst of my addiction, you know, I used to
31:05
do stupid stuff, you know, like open container arrest.
31:09
I used to write bad checks on my own account, knowing that
31:12
there's no money in there. And my dad most time would get
31:15
me off. You know, one particular time in
31:18
the midst of my addiction, I used to write checks, my dad's
31:22
checks, because I got my legal name is Leo Steven Barbie.
31:25
My dad's name is Leo Barbie. So I used to write checks.
31:28
His checks bounced. And one time I end up running up
31:30
about $700.00 of bad bounced checks, you know, and, and just
31:35
the active addiction. But this particular time my dad
31:39
couldn't Get Me Out of it. You know, he couldn't talk to
31:41
the judge and say this was too big.
31:46
And so I get out on bond and from December 21st until June,
31:53
I'm out on bond going back and forth to court, getting new
31:58
lawyers. Couldn't figure out how did I
32:00
get caught up in a 13 men federal drug conspiracy.
32:05
It was the three minutes that particular was under
32:11
surveillance. I didn't even know it and my
32:15
second lawyer had to drop off my case.
32:18
Conflict of interest. I didn't realize that a guy that
32:21
I was getting high with in Lawrence, KS.
32:23
He was ACI confidential informant working for the
32:26
government, working off his prison time, but setting other
32:30
people up. And she told me, do you know
32:33
this gentleman? I said, yeah.
32:34
She said, he's the one that got you connected.
32:36
And that day, looking back, when I went in and purchased that
32:40
$100, it was him and another guy.
32:45
And that particular day we used to go get high, like, OK, let's
32:48
go to your apartment. This particular, he's like, not
32:50
today. Here, let me break you off a
32:52
little something. I didn't realize that the other
32:54
guy was an undercover cop. And they went.
32:58
Yeah, they went down to Douglas County, turned in the evidence
33:02
and and so that's what happened. And so now back and forth to
33:06
court and it I never forget because I was out on pretrial
33:11
services, I had to call every morning to see if my name's up
33:14
for drug testing. I would go with this particular
33:18
moment in my life. It was 2 weeks.
33:22
Every day I Call My Name wasn't up right and it was a Friday.
33:26
Man, I'm sitting in Topeka. I'm just like trying to figure
33:29
out this tend to life. That's all I kept hearing tend
33:31
to life and I went out that night and I purchased $50.00
33:34
worth of crack cocaine and 1/2 pint of vodka for the next
33:39
morning. I called it.
33:41
Was your turn. It was my turn and there's
33:44
nothing I could do. And I went and gave the UA
33:47
Saturday morning, Monday morning at eight O 5, Miss Kearns, she
33:51
called me eight O 5. We're great friends.
33:53
Now that's another part of the story.
33:56
She called me eight O 5. She said, Mr. Barbie, how are
33:58
you doing? So I'm doing great.
33:59
She said, Are you sure? I'm like, oh, I'm doing great.
34:00
She said, no, you're not. She said, what I'm looking at,
34:03
you gave me a dirty UA And she said, as we speak, I am writing
34:07
a warrant for your arrest. Well, because of my petty crimes
34:13
in Lawrence, I had a court date. My dad came and picked me up.
34:17
And I never forget. I walked into the courthouse and
34:20
the prosecutor stands up, say, you honor, we drop all charges
34:24
against Mr. Barbie, right? You know, I'm thinking I'm going
34:26
to score a touchdown. And he said Mr. Barbie has a
34:31
bigger fish that he needs to deal with, and he has a federal
34:35
warrant. And they arrested me.
34:37
I lost my freedom. You know, I lost everything.
34:42
And that was in June of 2008. That was the moment of my rock
34:49
bottom. And you know, not the deputies
34:57
came in the rest of me, the marshals, you know, that's,
35:00
that's the big leagues. You know, it wasn't Barney Fife
35:04
and Goober. It, it, it was good.
35:07
And so, so from June when I lost my freedom, which by the way,
35:13
that that was the last time I ever used drugs, I've been
35:17
clean, sober, delivered since June of 2008, which is going on
35:20
16 years back and forth the court, back and forth the court.
35:26
And then finally on August 29th of 2009, I got the 70 month
35:35
sentence. And the thing of it is, is that
35:39
I'll never forget Judge Lunchtime said this on the
35:42
record. He said, Mr. Barbie, you, you
35:45
don't fit the tight. You know, you're educated, your
35:50
parents is in the courtroom. You, you don't you know, he
35:54
said, I don't know what excuses you can make, he said, but I do
35:57
know that you're dealing with some demons.
36:00
And he said, I pray that this 70 months that you face your
36:04
demons. And I did, you know, going from
36:08
CCA to Pekin, IL and believe it or not, the the feds can make a
36:16
mistake when they're giving you your points.
36:19
And I kept going because of my criminal history.
36:21
I shouldn't been in a medium federal institution, but I was.
36:28
But the thing of it is, Brent, is that, you know, it was a
36:32
journey that God placed me on, you know, being in that
36:36
environment, adapting to that environment, but yet allowing
36:40
myself to face me. Like Steven, what was going
36:45
through that? What were, how did you adapt to
36:48
that environment? Because everybody's kind of goes
36:50
about their time, doing their time the way they do their time.
36:54
How? How did you do your time?
36:56
Well, it's funny, right? The first day when I was there
37:00
at Pekin, I'm walking across the yard and it was totally empty.
37:07
I'm walking in. A CEO calls me out and says,
37:11
hey, you. And of course, you use some
37:13
choice words. And I'm like, yeah, And I
37:16
pointed. He says, who else am I talking
37:17
to? So I walk up.
37:18
And he said, what do you think you're doing walking around my
37:20
compound like this? And, and he goes on and on and
37:23
on. And so I said, Sir, can I make a
37:25
statement? I said, this is my first morning
37:27
ever waking up in a prison. And he apologized.
37:30
He says, Sir, you can't walk. This is a controlled movement.
37:35
Once you go back to your housing unit and have somebody school
37:37
you, you know, and I tell people about prison, it's not what's in
37:42
the handbook that you should know.
37:45
It's in the unwritten rules, right?
37:49
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And, and so once I began to
37:51
learn and adapt to that, right. And the uniqueness of when I was
37:56
at Pacific Garden Mission and, and, and getting my call to
37:58
ministry and, and surrendering my call because I am a licensed
38:01
ordained minister. My work detail was in religious
38:07
services. I meant never worked in the
38:12
child hall, never worked in the yard, never it was in.
38:14
And so I was able to use my God-given calling to my gifts in
38:18
prison, you know, and I was able to learn free of charge about
38:24
all the different faiths, you know, the Nation of Islam, the
38:29
Muslim, the Sunni Muslim, the Santerias, the, the Native
38:33
Americans, the Hebrew Israelite. I, I know how they serve their
38:37
faith because I have to set up the Chapel for, you know, with
38:40
their rug, they have to set the Chapel up, you know, with, with
38:43
the Austrias, I have to set the Chapel up.
38:46
And so I was able to get a free education, but then yet I was
38:49
still to able to strengthen my own faith.
38:53
And so in the midst of, of this journey, just not questioning
38:58
God, but I asked God a question one day and I said, why, why did
39:02
you go to such extreme with me? You know, why?
39:06
Why not treatment? God said treatment, right?
39:11
You know, why not the county jail?
39:13
He said the county jail, I said, but you, you, you skip the state
39:17
system and take me from the county straight to the feds.
39:20
And that's what he said. He said, son, he said the
39:23
greater the call, the greater the fall.
39:26
He said you had to follow this great to know I put a call in
39:29
your life. And so in the midst of the
39:32
journey of, of, of going from peaking and then finally my
39:37
points came on on, on my on the system about eight or nine
39:42
months in and they called me. I was on the yard that
39:46
particular day, told me I need to get back to my housing unit
39:48
immediately. And my unit manager, my case
39:51
managers said, do you want to tell them?
39:53
I said, tell me what they said, Mr. Barbie, you was right.
39:58
I only had 11 points. I should have been as this, you
40:05
know, club fed. I should have been at a camp,
40:07
right? And here I am at a medium.
40:10
They made a mistake, right? And they said we, we, we're
40:13
starting to process the paper to get you off of this compound
40:16
immediately. So I said, well, what camp are
40:19
you going to? And so, Mr. Barbara, sorry, the
40:21
BOP policy is because you had to meet him, you have to go to a
40:24
low and then to a camp. And so then I had to do the
40:28
famous catch, the famous Conair from Chicago O'Hare flew down to
40:33
Oklahoma City for 14 days, got back on Conair, flew into
40:37
Memphis and caught the bus over to Forest City, Arkansas.
40:40
Because I was really facing my demons of addiction, right?
40:46
I asked myself a simple question, where am I?
40:50
How'd I get here and where am I going?
40:54
And when I asked those honest questions I asked myself a
40:58
simple question. I said how many times was your
41:01
arrested sober? Never I told myself.
41:06
I said if I just stay off the alcohol, if I stay off the crack
41:09
or stay off the marijuana anti mine altering drug.
41:12
I said I would never ever have to wear these silver handcuffs
41:15
again and being khakis and by God's grace, I have it.
41:18
So in the midst of, of, of facing my addiction and my
41:23
demons and, and facing them, I went through the RDAP program,
41:26
which is a residential drug and alcohol program to, to get those
41:31
tools that that was going to put me on the pathway to be
41:34
successful. Because I completed RDAP, I did
41:38
not do the full 70 months. I only served 44 months behind
41:41
the walls. Come back to Kansas City January
41:46
18th, 2012. I never forget I caught the
41:49
Jefferson line. And every time I see Jefferson
41:51
line here in Kansas City, you know, I, I, it just takes me
41:54
back. I see it going South and I see
41:57
it coming N you know, I'll never forget.
42:00
My dad picks me up at the bus station here and he goes to the
42:02
side and you know how they lift the side to get your luggage?
42:05
And he said, son, which one is yours?
42:07
And I said, dad, this is all I had.
42:10
It's all I had, right? But it's enough to have a fresh
42:13
start. And because it was a journey,
42:16
right? I understand that God put me on
42:20
his journey, right? To, to understand re entry, to
42:24
think and, and all the barriers, right?
42:27
Because I have a saying, if you change your thinking, you can
42:29
change your outlook, you change your outlook, you will most ever
42:32
change your outcome. And so for 71 days after my
42:36
release, I was gainfully employed at City Union Mission,
42:40
which is the homeless shelter here in Kansas City.
42:43
And my journey of giving and serving this community, it just
42:47
went from City Union Mission to Metro Lutheran Ministries.
42:51
And at Metro Lutheran Ministries is one of the bigger
42:54
not-for-profit that helps people across the city.
42:58
I love that, Steven. So also because I I, I was, as
43:04
I'm thinking about your story, you have daughters in the midst
43:08
of all this. How old would they be when you
43:11
got out and 2018? Well, that's a great question
43:15
because my, my youngest daughter at the time, she was 15 or 16,
43:21
you know, my son was 18 going on 19 at the time.
43:25
That made my oldest daughter 3132 years old, OK.
43:30
And so no, she was like late 20s, twenty 829.
43:37
And so in the midst of how do I rebuild that bridge, right,
43:43
People say I burnt bridge. I said, no, we really don't burn
43:46
bridges. We damaged them pretty severely.
43:50
You know, my my two daughters and son, they're always my
43:54
children. I've always been a father.
43:58
I've always provided I said, so I had to rebuild just our
44:03
fellowship, right? And I never forget my son.
44:06
He's a he's an MMA cage fighter boxer.
44:10
So he had a fight here in Kansas City.
44:13
And that weekend the children's mother, because we're divorced
44:19
now, they came and my children's mother said, your daughter wants
44:23
to talk to you. And so she went off to the side
44:27
of the hotel and she said, Dad, what happened?
44:29
You know, you was preaching, you know what happened?
44:33
And so I just told her, you know, dad, you know, old way of
44:37
living, the drugs lost my freedom and we both cried and
44:41
embraced. I asked her to forgive me.
44:42
She said, Dad, I already forgave you.
44:44
I just wanted to hear it from you.
44:47
And so in the midst of that and and in the midst of being, you
44:51
know, reentry and returning citizen and and understanding
44:55
all the barriers, right, no, right, no birth certificate,
44:59
right. And I had to learn how to live
45:02
reentry, right? I didn't realize that God was
45:07
saying I want you to live it because you're going to go back
45:10
and serve others. And help them.
45:13
And help them right and, and in the midst of that, I went to
45:15
Metro Lutheran's and, and because of what they was doing,
45:18
they, they got a small grant from the Department of
45:22
Correction. They placed me over to grant.
45:23
And so I was able to serve returning citizen, getting out
45:26
and, you know, giving them jobs and IDs and birth certificates.
45:30
And I'll never forget there was a the event here in the Kansas
45:33
City area and a staff person from Leavenworth Federal Prison
45:38
came up and said, Mr. Barbie, how you doing?
45:41
She said, I need a favor. She says, I had this event
45:44
coming up at Leavenworth. It's the graduation.
45:49
My guest speaker, he's ghosting me.
45:51
He won't return my calls, phone calls, emails, text.
45:54
She said, do you know a good speaker?
45:56
I said yeah. She said, well, who?
45:58
I said me. She said me.
46:00
She said, look, I'm serious. I said no, I'm serious.
46:03
And because of this staff person, give me the opportunity,
46:09
Brent. That was my first opportunity of
46:11
going back into the prisons to to encourage and to empower and
46:16
to encourage individuals to connect with them.
46:19
Say no. I sat where you sat, so I
46:21
understand. And because of opportunity, our
46:23
doors literally swung wide open, you know, because people begin
46:27
to hear about this pastor son, the former All American that's
46:32
out. And so I went from working at
46:35
Metro Luton as a program coordinator.
46:37
Now I start work with connection to success.
46:40
And because of that opportunity, community outreach manager, I
46:42
began to go back into prisons in both Missouri and Kansas,
46:47
recruiting men and women to go through their personal
46:51
professional development. Well, as my three years there,
46:54
over 350 individuals went through their training program
46:59
because I could connect with them.
47:01
So I left there and right in the middle of pandemic and, and it
47:07
was just one of those God moments sitting there and he
47:12
told me to leave, leave connections.
47:17
It's like whoa. And I left, I left with nothing
47:22
but faith and nothing but God. And because of that, the P2P
47:27
would stand for passionate purpose ministries and
47:30
passionate purpose LLC was birth.
47:33
And because of that, I'm able to do what I'd love to do as a life
47:36
coach, as a mentor, able to go back into the prisons and and
47:41
not only in state prisons, both in Missouri and Kansas.
47:45
You know, I've been in several prisons across the country.
47:47
You know, I've had the opportunity to speak at the
47:49
Fatherhood conference there in Minneapolis, MN and.
47:52
Yeah. It's a big.
47:53
Brotherhood conference there in Richmond, VA.
47:56
I spoke out at the Native American Child Support Division
48:00
out there in San Diego and it's just a joy, right?
48:04
Because I tell people, I said write your goals down.
48:10
Write them down right And Brent, I one of my goals was to speak
48:15
in all the prisons in the state of Kansas.
48:18
Yeah. And I have.
48:20
Well, you're going to like this because this this nightmare
48:23
success at an out show goes into over 400 prisons and across the
48:26
United States. And I and I and I love that
48:29
because, you know, this show has grown into a show that is about
48:35
guys that go through what you're talking about, Steven, but it's
48:39
not easy. Re entry is really not easy.
48:44
That's I think, and I think that's one of the things I think
48:46
people know that prison's going to be tough.
48:48
You know, I, I think that's, you know, you can, you can gear up
48:53
for knowing that. I just know that's going to be
48:54
bad. But I think one thing that's the
48:56
biggest surprise, and I think the recidivism the way that it
48:59
is, is because you think, OK, I'm out.
49:03
You know, I accomplished that. I'm out.
49:05
And the re entry thing is really tough for a lot of reasons.
49:09
And a lot of it is because there's just so many barriers
49:12
and so many things that are stacked and there shouldn't be
49:16
as many barriers. There's just there, there should
49:18
be a whole different way that it's, that it's set up.
49:21
But I love the fact of, of these type of stories, Steven, that
49:26
you're talking about, because these people can download these
49:30
and, and listen to them and, and say, OK, it's doesn't sound like
49:34
it's going to be easy, but but I can make it.
49:36
I can make it step at a time. It is, you know the system,
49:40
right Every how you want to describe it, right?
49:43
It's set up to send you back. Exactly.
49:48
You know when I got my ID, right?
49:51
Oh, you need your birth certificate and your Social
49:53
Security cards and I go get my try to get my birth certificate.
49:56
Oh, you need your ID, your Social Security.
49:58
You try to go get your Social Security.
50:00
Oh, you need your it's like, well, wait a minute, what's
50:01
going on here, right? Aren't you our governmental
50:04
agencies that you can, you know, you know, send the file or
50:09
accept this document? And and that's the thing a lot
50:12
of people just don't understand. Now watch this because I deal a
50:15
lot with Ken's department correction and in Missouri,
50:17
department correction, right? A person gets out Brent and they
50:22
tell them you got 15 days to gain employment.
50:25
Right. I'm educated.
50:28
It took me 71 days, right? And the only time that I ever
50:32
was written up in my 44 months of, of incarceration was at the
50:35
halfway house because I was not working.
50:41
And so the thing of it is as, as, as a court advocate and as a
50:45
mouthpiece, you know, I, I, I network and I, I network because
50:51
for those I need to serve my network when I go to department,
50:56
when I go to the DMV and the lady, she's going through her
50:59
spiel. And then I pulled her to the
51:01
side and said, Miss, I said, those that I bring in here just
51:06
got out of prison. I said, can you accept their
51:10
prison ID and the letter from the halfway house as documents?
51:14
And she was like, yes, So she knew when I came in those that
51:18
I'm bringing, right? It made the process a lot
51:21
easier. And, and that's what it's all
51:23
about. It is making it easier, you
51:25
know, letting people know what's available, letting people know,
51:29
you know, because I only served 26 months of post release, March
51:32
3rd, 2014, case closed. Done.
51:36
I regained my voting rights back, right?
51:39
But I had to go fill out the paperwork.
51:41
If I never fill out the paperwork, I can never had
51:45
walked into a voting booth and I tell people there's a lot of
51:47
things that's out there that we have to be a mouthpiece.
51:53
You know, I used a scenario. Let me be Moses and I go talk to
51:57
your Pharaoh because a lot of individuals just don't know.
52:00
I share these two quick stories. 1A gentleman was getting ready
52:05
to go into a transitional house. He did everything that they
52:07
asked him to do did the online app.
52:12
They set up a phone screen. Brent, he didn't have a cell
52:15
phone and I told him to come to my office.
52:18
He came to my office. He did the phone screen and and
52:21
the lady on the other end says your better be ready in three
52:25
weeks. I said let me see the phone and
52:28
all I said was hello. She said oh Mr. Steven, I said
52:32
yeah. Oh he didn't tell me you was
52:33
working with him. Tell him his better be ready in
52:36
three hours. Well, why?
52:40
Because, you know, my brother blocked for me in football and I
52:45
scored. I learned to block for these
52:48
individuals, right? And I tell people, I said just
52:51
trust me. If you just trust me, we'll get
52:54
the results. I had another degree.
52:56
It's but Steven, I want to I don't want to just go what
52:59
around that distance, stop it. The, the big, the big part of
53:02
that is, is that you walked it, you lived it.
53:06
And, and so you learned it because you, you, you lived it.
53:10
And, and I think that's where the trust is built in by you
53:13
being able to go back into those prisons and talk.
53:16
There is a built in because a lot of people have lost their
53:19
trust. They've lost the hope and and
53:23
the trust and hope are such big catalyst for being able to step
53:27
forward. That's.
53:28
It and that's what you're doing for people.
53:30
And I think that's such a big deal because if those people can
53:33
get somebody they trust, then they get some hope going and
53:37
then they start stepping in the right direction.
53:39
That's the momentum that works. Right.
53:41
It is. And because I, you know, after I
53:44
left connections and, and started P to P and then at one
53:48
time I was working full time with Prison Fellowship
53:50
Ministries with Chuck Colson and that organization.
53:53
I was the field director over Kansas in Missouri, which placed
53:56
me literally over 22 prisons in Missouri and 15 in Kansas.
54:00
I'll never forget we went to one particular prison and we were
54:03
signing individuals up for the Angel Tree and a gentleman was
54:07
getting out and he said, can you bring me some resources?
54:11
And of course, I went to the chaplain.
54:13
I said, could I give him a few phone numbers?
54:15
And he said, yeah, well, when I came back, Brent, first thing he
54:19
says, you got that for me. Now, if I didn't have the
54:24
numbers, I would have lost all trust with him, right?
54:29
And because I had the numbers right, then he began to open up
54:32
even more and right, and then got in contact with his family,
54:40
Prison fellowship, gave him the toys.
54:43
He was so thankful and grateful, right?
54:46
Who was the first person he called when he got out, that
54:53
trust factor, right? And it is building trust and
54:57
being a man of your word. I'll never forget, you know,
55:01
another time a guy had gotten out, came to my office and I
55:05
told him, I said by the end of the day you'll have your birth
55:08
certificate. And he licked me in the eye.
55:10
He said, man, don't lie to me, but I could talk his language.
55:14
I said when you're behind the walls, what all you have, He
55:17
says your word. I said, I gave you my word.
55:20
And so by me being a network, I knew where to go get a voucher
55:24
to get his birth certificate. We went down to 2400 troops here
55:28
in Kansas City, MO, got his birth certificate, right.
55:30
And the next thing you know, and the next sentence, this is what
55:35
he said, come on, let's go get my ID.
55:38
And I said, no, let's celebrate your success.
55:42
Let's let's celebrate. I said this time yesterday you
55:45
was in prison. This time yesterday you didn't
55:49
have a voucher for your birthday.
55:50
This time yesterday you didn't have your birth certificate.
55:52
I said, no, learn to celebrate your success.
55:56
And I believe with reentry and how to cut down on recidivism is
56:01
is to make goals right, that the end of visuals can be
56:07
successful. Yeah, and then and then what
56:10
you're bringing up those, Steven, is to celebrate those
56:13
daily victories you have because you're stepping up.
56:16
That's one of the things. I mean, I talk about Shawshank
56:18
Redemption all the time because it's got so many life lessons in
56:21
it. But you know, you've got Andy
56:22
Dufresne that's chipping through a wall for 19 years to get to
56:25
his Zenuan to nail his freedom. But what does he do every day?
56:28
He's got holes in his pockets and he walks that yard and lets
56:32
that wall out because he knows he's staying on his daily.
56:35
They test. That's his daily victory, that
56:36
he's staying on task to get to Zeiwantaneo.
56:39
And that's what you're just talking about.
56:41
Don't, don't walk over things that you should be celebrating.
56:45
The successes you have, Celebrate them so it gives you
56:48
more momentum to step again and that's a big deal.
56:52
It is, you know, You know, once I was on the yard there in
56:56
Lansing, just walking the yard and just, you know, shaking
56:59
hands and conversation. One gentleman, he walks up, he's
57:02
about 6263. I looked him in the eye and I
57:06
said, did you play high school football at Topeka Highland Park
57:09
in Topeka, KS? And he said, yeah, I said you
57:12
played college football at Peru State College in Nebraska.
57:15
He said, yeah. I said Steve Barbie.
57:17
I said, I played against you in high school.
57:19
I said we were teammates at Peru, right?
57:22
And he began to cry. He said, Barbie man.
57:25
He said, you, you bought me some hope today, right?
57:29
And I think that it is as as as a society that we just had to be
57:34
hope deliverers, right? Just just a little hope, right?
57:39
If it's just a job lead, right? Or if it's just a housing
57:44
opportunity, right, just be that hope deliver and then let hope
57:48
do us do his work, you know, and that's that's the joy I get
57:52
because able to use my experience, right?
57:55
To be an encouragement to to be able to look a man in the eye
57:59
and says, I understand. You know, I spoke at one prison
58:04
and there was the one guy on the front row, Brent Defiant, would
58:07
not stand up for me. And I walked up with conviction.
58:12
I said, you will stand because I sat where you sat.
58:17
And he stood up. He apologized.
58:21
I was in that particular prison the rest of the day.
58:23
I made a friend. He came up and he said, man, I
58:26
didn't know that you had sat in my chair.
58:28
He began to open up and said, you know, I didn't have my dad
58:31
around the streets called me and I got caught up.
58:34
And why could I stand there with that conviction?
58:38
It's because I sat in that seat. And that's the joy of it is if
58:43
you said in that seat, right, you understand the burdens that
58:48
that individual is actually caring.
58:50
And so, you know, it's been a joyride, you know, to to meet
58:54
you and your audience and then others across the country.
58:58
It's, it's hard sometimes it's a joy, right When a prosecutor or
59:05
a judge call me and says I have a tough client.
59:08
Can you meet with them? And I, I said, bring them on,
59:12
you know? And you're making a difference,
59:15
Steven, with that. Before I want to ask you, before
59:18
I ask you that question, what's your biggest take away through
59:21
this journey? I want to recognize Night for
59:24
Success is sponsored by the White Collar Support Group.
59:29
It's the it's the world's first support group devoted to people
59:32
navigating the white collar criminal justice system.
59:35
I'm a member of the White Collar Support Group.
59:36
And I can tell you that there's a bunch of people who help each
59:39
other through the criminal justice journey for free.
59:42
Whether you're just starting your journey or you made it
59:44
through the other side, this is a great space for you.
59:46
You can join us on Zoom Monday, 7:00 PM Eastern Time, 4:00 PM
59:50
Pacific. For information, go to
59:52
prisonist.org. That's prisonist.org.
59:55
Start here. So Steven, what, what do you
59:57
think is after you've gone through all this?
59:59
What? What do you think's your biggest
1:00:00
take away from everything? You know, I had, that's a great
1:00:05
question. I had a, one of my clients
1:00:09
because I, I do serve as a court advocate today.
1:00:11
And certainly they got to go through particular training
1:00:15
classes which I facilitate. And he licked me in the eye one
1:00:18
day. He said, Mr. Steven, he said,
1:00:20
where do you get your strength from?
1:00:23
He said, where do you get it from?
1:00:25
And my strength comes because I share my weakness.
1:00:30
Vulnerability. I, I share that, right?
1:00:34
It's, it's not, you know, everybody has a blind spot,
1:00:37
right? And I tell people I share my
1:00:39
weakness. I, you know, I, people don't
1:00:43
invite me to come and speak because I'm all American.
1:00:45
That's just part of it. People invite me to come and
1:00:47
speak because of my addiction, my homelessness, my
1:00:51
incarceration. And I tell the young man, I
1:00:54
said, that's where my strength come from, you know, because I
1:00:59
share my story and, and, and I share it because I know what
1:01:06
individuals need to hear, right? And I tell people there's a,
1:01:09
there's a lot behind this smile, you know, and, and the smile
1:01:13
because there's joy to living life to the fullest now.
1:01:16
And that's what I do, you know, just last night, I was inside of
1:01:19
a low custody prison here in Kansas City with 16 men in the
1:01:24
group. And Brent, two of the men had
1:01:27
just gotten out within the last 12 days.
1:01:32
And this is what I said, welcome home.
1:01:37
And their faces lit up. Just that alone, welcome home
1:01:45
made a difference in those men's life.
1:01:47
And then last night with the other fourteen men in the group
1:01:50
and we talked about goals and their input and, and changing
1:01:54
that mindset of what a goal is, you know, And so that's what
1:01:57
it's all about, you know, is it's now, you know, I tell
1:02:00
people I I'm not existing, but I'm living life to the fullest.
1:02:06
And every single day I get opportunities like this and
1:02:10
others to meet people in in boardrooms or or at a bus stop
1:02:17
to share, you know, that there is hope.
1:02:21
There is hope. I love it.
1:02:23
And that's that's what a lot of what you're talking about is all
1:02:26
about hope, Steven. Yeah, as far as getting a hold
1:02:29
of you, I think Steve, is it Steven?
1:02:33
Your website is Steven Barbie. Stevenbarbie.com Yes Sir.
1:02:38
Stevenbarbie.com, which is easy. Yeah, it's S and it's Stephen.
1:02:43
So on Barbie. It's great stuff, Steven, I love
1:02:49
what you're doing. You're giving back, you're
1:02:52
taking your experience and your journey and, and, and helping
1:02:55
people through and, and what a wonderful feeling that's got to
1:02:58
give you to do that. It's, it's, it's a big deal.
1:03:01
I'm and I, I've networking like you do and doing it.
1:03:05
I, I just know that you're going to just be able to do more and
1:03:08
more of it because you're, you're in the thick of it.
1:03:10
I can see it, I can feel it with what you're doing.
1:03:14
So I, I really appreciate you being here today and sharing
1:03:17
your story for those out there. I, I want to give a shout out to
1:03:22
Homestead Financial who lets me use this podcast room.
1:03:24
And if, if, if, if you're looking for home mortgage needs,
1:03:29
Greg Aftiev is your guide. If you're looking for a book out
1:03:32
there, check mine out Nightmare success.
1:03:36
And if I know it's a hassle, but I, I've got to say it because
1:03:39
it's such a big deal. If you've got time, go to Apple,
1:03:43
leave a review. It puts the show on steroids.
1:03:46
If you're looking for me, go to brentcassidy.com.
1:03:49
I spell it wrong. It's not with AD why?
1:03:52
It's with ATY. And as I used to say when I was
1:03:56
writing my emails back and forth from Leavenworth, stay strong.
1:03:59
I'll do the same. Stephen Barbary, you are the
1:04:02
man. I appreciate you doing all that
1:04:05
you do and thanks for being a guest today.
1:04:07
Man, thank you, Brenton, to the listeners.
1:04:09
I just leave you with one nugget here.
1:04:13
Leave the seed in the ground and let time water it, because
1:04:17
eventually it's going to sprout and grow.
1:04:20
That's good stuff. That's that's where we're going
1:04:22
to leave it, Steven. I love that nightmare success in
1:04:25
and out.