Latest / Caught on the Mike... / "Straight outta the kitchen" with Sadie Gray (Meathead Test Kitchen)

Transcript

"Straight outta the kitchen" with Sadie Gray (Meathead Test Kitchen) · Caught on the Mike...

0:00
SPEAKER_01: Disclaimer, the views and opinions expressed in this program are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of any entities they represent.
0:11
SPEAKER_01: Listener discretion is advised.
0:26
SPEAKER_01: Much like myself, my next guest lives and breathes all things apologize.
0:45
SPEAKER_01: Found a love of fitness, became a certified personal trainer, and is now the co-host and coach with Meathead S.
0:55
SPEAKER_01: Gitchens, a popular fitness podcast and program that she does with her best friend Sasha.
1:02
SPEAKER_01: My old friend Sadie Gray joins me on the podcast today, and we have a great time covering a whole lot of a little bit of everything.
1:11
SPEAKER_01: Ladies and gentlemen, this is Caught on the Mic.
1:19
SPEAKER_01: I am about to make a liar of myself.
1:22
SPEAKER_01: I did a social media post this last week where I said, you know, I'm gonna cut back on the music-based episodes a little bit and go back into some of the other potpourri I'm into.
1:33
SPEAKER_01: But my next guest, I have a connection to through music, through a mutual love of music, but she's gone beyond music.
1:41
SPEAKER_01: She's a fellow podcaster, she is a personal trainer, certified personal trainer, co-host and coach of Meathead Test Kitchen, Sadie Gray.
1:51
SPEAKER_01: How the hell are you?
1:53
SPEAKER_01: Oh, I am great, sir.
1:54
SPEAKER_01: How are you?
1:55
SPEAKER_01: I am fantastic.
1:56
SPEAKER_01: Do you think uh we're really gonna get this snow mageddon that they're forecasting for us right now?
2:01
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna suck.
2:02
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be cold and windy.
2:03
SPEAKER_00: We know that much here, and that's enough to make me not want to leave the house for like four days.
2:07
SPEAKER_00: So I went to the grocery store yesterday.
2:09
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, whatever, fuck it.
2:11
SPEAKER_00: Right, right, right.
2:12
SPEAKER_01: So to people that are not from our area of the country, there is this phenomenon known as the Oma Dome.
2:19
SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
2:19
SPEAKER_01: It means that there's this giant dome over Omaha and Lincoln where major storm systems either go to the north of us or go to the south of us.
2:27
SPEAKER_00: Oh no, I've I've seen some shit.
2:29
SPEAKER_00: I've seen some crazy.
2:30
SPEAKER_00: I mean, I've I've done hurricanes, so I mean, nothing really surprises me at this point anymore.
2:35
SPEAKER_01: Right, right.
2:37
SPEAKER_00: But they're like, it's gonna be cold and really windy and like snow for a couple days.
2:40
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, all right, cool.
2:41
SPEAKER_00: Am I gonna have internet and power?
2:43
SPEAKER_00: Then I'm good.
2:44
SPEAKER_00: Can I flush my toilet?
2:46
SPEAKER_00: I'm good.
2:47
SPEAKER_01: It's funny you bring up hurricanes because that is part of your origin story or your long history.
2:56
SPEAKER_01: So without any further ado, why don't you introduce yourself and let's talk about that history, starting with radio and to where you're at now.
3:04
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so um, I mean, you and I have known each other since I was baby Sadie days back when I worked at the river, because that was my first radio job.
3:12
SPEAKER_00: I was the I hosted the local music show Planet O.
3:14
SPEAKER_00: So that's how we cross paths.
3:16
SPEAKER_00: Um, and it's hilarious.
3:19
SPEAKER_00: Like I left for a while and came back, and it's still the same people working at shows, no matter where you go, dude.
3:25
SPEAKER_00: I went to Sokol one time after we moved back from Puerto Rico, and I was greeted at the door by a security guard that was like, Do you have a ticket or do you need me to walk you back?
3:33
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, Holy shit.
3:37
SPEAKER_00: Like, they fucking remembered you.
3:39
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, apparently.
3:41
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, to those guys, it's still like yesterday.
3:44
SPEAKER_01: Like 10 years ago is only like two years ago.
3:46
SPEAKER_00: For real.
3:47
SPEAKER_00: Like, it's so many, like, oh my god, those guys and gals that worked security at Sokol have peeled so many fucking sweaty bodies out of crowd surf scenarios.
3:57
SPEAKER_00: It's stupid.
3:58
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, no, like that's that's kind of how I started in town.
4:02
SPEAKER_00: You know, I'm I'm from a small town in western Iowa named Denison.
4:05
SPEAKER_00: I don't recommend ever visiting.
4:07
SPEAKER_00: You don't need to, there's nothing to see there.
4:08
SPEAKER_00: Um, but you know, I moved to Omaha because it was the closest city.
4:12
SPEAKER_00: It was either Sioux City, Des Moines, or Omaha.
4:14
SPEAKER_00: And well, Sioux City, Sioux City.
4:15
SPEAKER_00: Des Moines is cool, but it's still Iowa.
4:18
SPEAKER_00: And I wanted something different.
4:19
SPEAKER_00: So I came to Nebraska, which is still pretty much the same thing.
4:22
SPEAKER_00: But Omaha is pretty fucking cool because like we have everything here, even though we're in the middle of nowhere, because we are the biggest dot in the middle of nowhere.
4:28
SPEAKER_00: So it's it's super convenient if you live in the nowhere around the dot.
4:32
SPEAKER_00: Um, but you know, I started in Omaha doing stuff at the river.
4:37
SPEAKER_00: Um then I graduated to producing the afternoon show with one of my best friends, Jake Ryan.
4:41
SPEAKER_00: And that was really cool.
4:43
SPEAKER_00: Um, and then I got my first big girl radio job at Clear Channel, uh, babysitting the building and dubbing in commercials from 6 p.m.
4:50
SPEAKER_00: to 10 p.m.
4:51
SPEAKER_00: That's the glorious life of a radio broadcaster when you first enter the industry.
4:55
SPEAKER_00: Uh, if you are ever looking into going into entertainment, sorry, not sorry, you're gonna have to do shitty chops first.
5:01
SPEAKER_00: It's just how it's just how it is.
5:03
SPEAKER_00: It's not that we're gonna make you you gotta learn how to do the shit so that you can be really awesome at it when you actually get on the air.
5:08
SPEAKER_00: You like you have to know the ins and outs of everything.
5:10
SPEAKER_00: So they start you at like the very base thing, and they're like, all right, rookie, here's your dubs.
5:15
SPEAKER_00: Bye.
5:16
SPEAKER_00: The station goes off the air and you can't figure out what button to push, call the engineer, he'll answer.
5:21
SPEAKER_00: It's like, okay, cool.
5:22
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, so you know, I I graduated and worked at Clear Channel, and that was the beginning of what I called my Yeehaw years.
5:29
SPEAKER_00: Um, because I worked in country radio for a really long time, which is ironic.
5:34
SPEAKER_00: Because when I started in broadcasting school, my advisor's like, what do you not want to work in?
5:38
SPEAKER_00: I was like, fucking country.
5:41
SPEAKER_00: We live in Nebraska.
5:42
SPEAKER_00: Country music is everywhere.
5:44
SPEAKER_01: How many radio stations, like active rock radio stations, I've turned into country stations in our lifetime?
5:50
SPEAKER_00: At least five.
5:52
SPEAKER_00: At least.
5:54
SPEAKER_01: Yep, yep.
5:55
SPEAKER_01: But there was a time even when you were on the river where you were doing Planet O.
5:59
SPEAKER_01: Weren't you doing Planet O and Punk Up the Volume at the same time?
6:02
SPEAKER_00: No, so they actually got rid of Punk Up the Volume because my co-host, my co-host for Planet O was the previous host of Punk Up the Volume, which I wanted that was the special show.
6:11
SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
6:12
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to oh my god, I want to punk up the volume so bad.
6:15
SPEAKER_00: Uh, and now that's why I host Emo Night at Sadies on my fucking mixed cloud.
6:18
SPEAKER_00: It's the same thing.
6:19
SPEAKER_00: It's like if I hosted it then, but now.
6:22
SPEAKER_00: Um, so yeah, like music has always just been something I've really liked, you know, ever since I was a kid.
6:27
SPEAKER_00: Uh I had I had parents that were pretty absent in both sides of the equation.
6:31
SPEAKER_00: So I spent a lot of time watching TV and listening to music.
6:34
SPEAKER_00: Uh, and I guess that's why I ended up being a professional bullshitter for a living, because that's just what I've known my whole life, right?
6:42
SPEAKER_00: It's it was cool to do country music, it was different, completely like same shit, different token kind of a thing, but like very different songwriting process.
6:51
SPEAKER_00: Like the songwriting process in country music versus rock music is like more.
6:56
SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's more like pop music.
6:57
SPEAKER_00: And I've always said country music is pop music with slide guitars, and you can fucking hang all you want for that, but I'm right.
7:03
SPEAKER_00: I was there for the birth of bro country, I'm fucking right.
7:07
SPEAKER_00: I've seen it.
7:09
SPEAKER_00: Um, but no, so you know, like it was it was cool to see like the the efforts that came together for like a number one single for Kenny Chesney.
7:17
SPEAKER_00: That's got four different people writing it, but you've got one person writing the melody on the guitar, and then someone else is doing that.
7:22
SPEAKER_00: Like, it's not just one person writing the lyrics, you know, they're coming together doing different aspects of it, which is something I didn't realize before, right?
7:28
SPEAKER_00: Um, because I thought it was just a bunch of assholes with yellow legal pads sitting around a table being like, Well, let's rhyme tractor with she thinks my is sexy.
7:36
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, I don't know.
7:38
SPEAKER_00: How did you like how what drugs were you doing when you came up with that song?
7:42
SPEAKER_00: I really want to know.
7:42
SPEAKER_00: These are the questions I want to ask, but I host a fitness podcast.
7:48
SPEAKER_01: That's funny.
7:49
SPEAKER_01: There is a trend I saw on TikTok recently where people are taking emo songs and emo song lyrics and turning them into like classic Wayland Jennings Johnny Cash style country songs, and it's like it's not that far of a stretch when you think about it.
8:05
SPEAKER_01: It works, it works.
8:07
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's the same elements.
8:09
SPEAKER_00: I mean, you've got sorrow, you've got alcoholism, you've got bad relationships.
8:13
SPEAKER_00: Like, it's just country's got fucking twang on it.
8:15
SPEAKER_00: That's all.
8:16
SPEAKER_01: So, did that experience kind of change your perspective on country at all?
8:20
SPEAKER_00: It did.
8:20
SPEAKER_00: Um, I actually like a lot of I my music taste is super fucking random.
8:25
SPEAKER_00: And I feel like when people say that, they say that, but they don't really mean it.
8:28
SPEAKER_00: Right.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: Like, go to my Spotify play.
8:30
SPEAKER_00: Like, my party mix playlist is the most random fucking thing you'll ever see.
8:34
SPEAKER_00: You'll see Bad Bunny next to LMFAO, next to fucking Eric Church, next to Kesha, next to the pie tasters.
8:40
SPEAKER_00: Like, it is the most amalgamation of red fucking shit you've ever heard.
8:44
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, country really like it's fun.
8:48
SPEAKER_00: It's fun.
8:49
SPEAKER_00: And when you when you let yourself resign to it and you get into the atmosphere, because I had to go to a lot of concerts, so I've seen everybody.
8:55
SPEAKER_00: I've met fucking Taylor Swift.
8:56
SPEAKER_00: Her mom did the backstage tour, her mom is cool as shit.
8:59
SPEAKER_00: Um, I've seen Eric Church play at the Ryman Auditorium at midnight to 300 people while I drank fucking Bloody Marys and ate bacon from a breakfast buffet.
9:08
SPEAKER_00: Uh, Luke Bryan has played a show to me and 200 some other people at Hard Rock Hotel upstairs in Nashville.
9:14
SPEAKER_00: Like I've I've seen, I sound like a jaded shit, but like I've seen and done things that people fucking wish they could do.
9:20
SPEAKER_00: So like it's it's really cool to just see them in that setting because we as I mean, we're entertainers too.
9:25
SPEAKER_00: We're telling their stories when they're playing their songs.
9:28
SPEAKER_00: We're just, you know, telling them in the interim.
9:30
SPEAKER_00: So it's really great to go and get that connection with that person.
9:34
SPEAKER_00: Um, and it's cool regardless of if it's an artist that you look up to or not.
9:38
SPEAKER_00: Like, yeah, it's it's really neat to be able to say, yeah, I was in a room when nobody knew who the fuck Sam Hunt was, and then he blew up on the top 40 charts, you know, a couple years ago.
9:47
SPEAKER_00: Like that was cool.
9:48
SPEAKER_00: We wore the same outfit that day.
9:49
SPEAKER_00: It was kind of embarrassing, but that flannel rules the world.
9:52
SPEAKER_00: What can I say?
9:54
SPEAKER_00: Um, but no, it's it's it's been really cool, you know, to see that that transition, like the mindset from, you know, like, oh, rock music is the best thing ever.
10:03
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, all right, there's other shit out here.
10:04
SPEAKER_02: Right.
10:05
SPEAKER_00: I just cut on that, but there's other shit out here, and these people are legit entertainers.
10:09
SPEAKER_00: Like, I've taken my husband to country shows that he didn't want to go to.
10:12
SPEAKER_00: I took him to a Brad Paisley concert, and he's like, I don't want to fucking go to a Brad Paisley concert.
10:16
SPEAKER_00: I was like, well, first of all, the meet and greets after the show, so you're going with me because I'm not sitting there by myself all fucking night.
10:22
SPEAKER_00: Second of all, his opener is Chris Young and he's a fucking banger.
10:25
SPEAKER_00: And like Brad Paisley played hot for teacher and he shredded the fucking guitar solo while singing with a headset on and running across the fucking front of the Century Link Center.
10:34
SPEAKER_00: It was incredible.
10:35
SPEAKER_00: Like that's shit that it doesn't matter what genre you're into, that is a fucking musician.
10:40
SPEAKER_00: Like, full stop.
10:42
SPEAKER_00: And it's it's cool to see.
10:44
SPEAKER_01: I think we get to a point in our lives where like when we're young and when we're in our late teens and early 20s, like it's just natural to be gatekeepers of the things that you love the most.
10:56
SPEAKER_01: And then as you let that guard down, things get a lot better.
11:00
SPEAKER_01: And and I know I had that same exact experience.
11:03
SPEAKER_01: I tell everybody, you know, whenever I walked away from playing music and I walked away from R Sing, I say, Yeah, that last year I did RSing.
11:12
SPEAKER_01: I was listening to Ryan Adams, Jay-Z, and anything but the genre I was doing because I just felt like I had outgrown it.
11:20
SPEAKER_01: And so I wasn't being genuine with the art of my own art anymore because it's not what I was listening to.
11:26
SPEAKER_00: And like in that regard, it was a good change of pace for me too, because people are like, How do you deal with listening to country music for seven hours a day?
11:32
SPEAKER_00: It's like it's the only time I listen to it.
11:34
SPEAKER_00: That's it.
11:35
SPEAKER_00: It's just at work.
11:36
SPEAKER_00: So it's a break from listening to, you know, the other shit that I listen to.
11:39
SPEAKER_00: Um, but I've also found like the older I get, I take breaks from certain genres of music every now, um, which I feel dirty saying because I have an alkaline trio tattoo.
11:48
SPEAKER_00: But like I they were number four or five in my Spotify rap this year.
11:52
SPEAKER_00: And I'm not embarrassed because I am an alkaline trio, like original card holding member of the fucking Blood Pack fan club.
11:59
SPEAKER_00: Like I've been in I've been in that shit for a while.
12:01
SPEAKER_00: Um, but Bad Bunny outseed Alkaline Trio on my Spotify rap this year.
12:08
SPEAKER_00: And if if you know me, that's of no fucking surprise.
12:11
SPEAKER_00: But like um, it's it's hilarious because I like Bad Bunny because he is into Molgoth culture.
12:17
SPEAKER_00: Uh Puerto Rican rap guys love Molgoth chicks, so they write songs about us and for us, and it's fucking amazing.
12:25
SPEAKER_00: Um, so again, like it's all the same shit, just a different flavor.
12:29
SPEAKER_00: Like, so it's it's just cool to see that like that emotional connection that runs throughout music, regardless of what type it is.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: It's all there.
12:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
12:37
SPEAKER_00: Um, and that's why I like it because it's like it's your soul, but in a catchy, fun way that makes you not want to cry for five minutes.
12:45
SPEAKER_01: I love that about you specifically.
12:47
SPEAKER_01: You and I, and I I feel like I say this with a lot of my guests, but maybe it's no coincidence.
12:51
SPEAKER_01: But you and I have a lot of parallels from the family background to the love of music.
12:56
SPEAKER_01: But this is another one that we haven't talked about before.
12:59
SPEAKER_01: My music tastes are very seasonal, and I can feel when one season stops and it's a hard stop, and another season begins.
13:07
SPEAKER_01: My Spotify Rapp was very similar.
13:09
SPEAKER_01: I was like, I've always kind of casually liked Misfits, for example, but I listened to the Misfits a lot around the Halloween season just because I wanted to get myself in the Halloween mood, and they were number one on my Spotify Rapped.
13:20
SPEAKER_01: I was like, fuck, I listened to a lot of Spotify in the month of October.
13:23
SPEAKER_00: God, the Misfits are one of those bands for me.
13:25
SPEAKER_00: Like, so I love the Misfits.
13:27
SPEAKER_00: I also have Misfits tattoo.
13:28
SPEAKER_00: It's on the other side of my alkaline tattoo.
13:31
SPEAKER_00: Um, but like I they're they're definitely a session band for me because a lot of their early recordings, even though the songs are fucking amazing, they are very rough.
13:40
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
13:41
SPEAKER_00: Um, like it's really hard.
13:44
SPEAKER_00: I love a good analog recording.
13:46
SPEAKER_00: Like, nothing will substitute a very rich, perfect fucking analog recording.
13:50
SPEAKER_00: However, back in the day when you were punk as fuck, you didn't always necessarily use the best, you know, methods.
13:56
SPEAKER_00: So your recordings didn't always come out great, and remastering can only do so much.
14:00
SPEAKER_00: So like I have to be in a mood for certain things.
14:02
SPEAKER_00: I will listen to a lot more Danzig most of the time than I do like just the misfits because Danzig's, you know, cuts are cleaner.
14:09
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
14:10
SPEAKER_00: Um but yeah, like what God, what have I been listening to lately?
14:13
SPEAKER_00: Lately, I've been crushing like my old Myspace Days playlists just because 'tis the season.
14:18
SPEAKER_00: Like it's it's fucking the the sky is the same color as the ground outside today, and my moods have been reflecting it, god damn it.
14:26
SPEAKER_00: I mean my music sick Right, right, yes.
14:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's it's crazy because if I have somebody on the show, like I've had Adam Russell from Story of the Year on, I've had Matt Shelton from Letter Kills on, and so whenever I have those guys on, I start listening to a lot of bands that are very adjacent to their bands and then bands that are adjacent to them.
14:46
SPEAKER_01: And my kick lately has been Rise Against for some reason.
14:49
SPEAKER_01: I have just been listened going through the whole catalog.
14:52
SPEAKER_01: But kind of to step back on the misfits, that's a really good example of sometimes getting disconnected where you want to kind of separate the art from the artist to some extent, you know.
15:05
SPEAKER_01: I I love your I love your misfits tattoo, by the way.
15:08
SPEAKER_01: But that's my favorite, that's actually my favorite era, is even though he's kind of a piece of shit, is the Michael Graves era of Misfits.
15:17
SPEAKER_01: It's like, God, I love the music in that era, but I'm not a huge fan of Michael Graves.
15:23
SPEAKER_00: Because you know how like Doyle's such a great dude.
15:25
SPEAKER_00: Yes, like Doyle is oh my god, my my oldest cat, her name is Frankenstein or uh Megatron Wolfgang, what is it, Megatron Kitty Wolfgang von Frankenstein or something?
15:35
SPEAKER_00: Megatron Kitty von Frankenstein.
15:37
SPEAKER_00: There we go.
15:38
SPEAKER_00: She's she's Doyle's firstborn cat child, he doesn't know it.
15:41
SPEAKER_00: Um like he's just such a great fucking guy, and everything you read about him, like the more like I think about like people who are like, oh my god, this girl wears all black and eyeliner and listens to punk music, and they thought that I was like, they were worried about me growing up, but yeah, I was like worshiping people like Doyle, who like posts him kissing a kitten on his fucking Instagram, and people think that he is just the world's biggest badass, and it's like these are the fucking people I've been worshiping for the last 25 years.
16:09
SPEAKER_00: What the fuck have y'all been doing?
16:10
SPEAKER_02: Right.
16:11
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, it's ah god, Michael Graves.
16:15
SPEAKER_00: That's a tough one.
16:16
SPEAKER_00: That is a tough one, and this is how I have navigated it.
16:19
SPEAKER_00: I have the old like I've purchased the albums, I have the rips of them, I listen to those on my iPod.
16:24
SPEAKER_00: I will not give that motherfucker any digital streams.
16:29
SPEAKER_00: If I want to listen to Bruiser, I will listen to it on my iPod.
16:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but I will not give him any fucking I don't even think Bruiser's on Spotify at this point anyway, so it doesn't matter.
16:38
SPEAKER_00: But like that's another thing.
16:40
SPEAKER_00: Dude, where are they taking our deep cuts?
16:43
SPEAKER_00: They keep fucking taking our deep cuts off Spotify.
16:45
SPEAKER_00: I want a manager, I want to told me that you were gonna make MP3s better, and then you gave us all this shit and let us integrate our own music, and then you started taking shit away, and then you're like, Oh, well, you can't listen to your music if you're outside your home network, and it's like, what?
16:57
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
17:00
SPEAKER_01: Yep.
17:01
SPEAKER_00: Spotify letter.
17:02
SPEAKER_00: But um, no, that's how I deal with the Michael Graves thing, because yeah, he's kind of a racist.
17:07
SPEAKER_01: So bringing it back in and reigning our love of music back in.
17:12
SPEAKER_00: You went to work for Clear Channel for a while, and then so then I moved uh I moved into the Lincoln market and I continued my Yeehaw years by working at Froggy98, which I never want to hear a fucking frog ribbot sound effect again in my life.
17:26
SPEAKER_00: Man, they run hard with that fucking gimmick.
17:28
SPEAKER_00: They were like, oh, well, all of our people have frog-related names, and I was like, Except for me, I fucking that shit.
17:38
SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
17:40
SPEAKER_00: Uh, but no, that was cool because that was the first chance I really had to like let my freak flag fly a little bit by like being my own on-air host because I had up to that point had like produced other people's shows or been the co-host or the fill-in or any of that shit.
17:53
SPEAKER_00: Um, so it was just really cool for me to be able to like have my own entity and do whatever the fuck I wanted with it.
17:58
SPEAKER_00: And it was fun because I apparently was really good at it because my ratings were awesome.
18:02
SPEAKER_00: Um, I very rarely took callers and played them on the air, and that was a point of pride for me.
18:06
SPEAKER_00: Like, I wanted to play as much fucking music as I possibly could because you're stuck at work, and the last fucking thing you want to do is listen to me talk until you're in the yell at me because I said some stupid shit or you know, whatever, and that's fine.
18:17
SPEAKER_00: That's what I get paid for.
18:18
SPEAKER_00: I'm cool with that.
18:19
SPEAKER_00: Right.
18:19
SPEAKER_00: I'm cool.
18:20
SPEAKER_00: But for you know, when you're sitting at your desk, you don't want to listen to me tell a story about my fucking cat rubbing her ass on the carpet the night before.
18:27
SPEAKER_00: Like you want to hear the fucking music.
18:29
SPEAKER_00: So I shut the fuck up and I play the fucking music.
18:31
SPEAKER_00: But um, that was a really cool experience for me as someone who grew up without a lot of validation.
18:37
SPEAKER_00: Um, I had to find validation in myself because my home life was pretty shitty.
18:41
SPEAKER_00: Uh, so to me, that was a really cool like Jim Carrey the mask.
18:45
SPEAKER_00: You like me, you really like me moment.
18:47
SPEAKER_00: Like it was it's really cool.
18:48
SPEAKER_00: Uh, people will say all you want, like validation doesn't fucking matter.
18:52
SPEAKER_00: That shit feels good.
18:52
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it does.
18:54
SPEAKER_00: It feels good when you've been trying to be good at it for a really long time and you've made it your craft and you've made it your life.
18:59
SPEAKER_00: Like that shit feels good.
19:00
SPEAKER_00: I don't care who you're talking to.
19:02
SPEAKER_00: Um, but it was it was good.
19:05
SPEAKER_00: Like that was a really cool opportunity for me to like go and I got to travel.
19:08
SPEAKER_00: Like, they'd send me to CRS, which is country radio seminar, uh, which is a week in Nashville unattended for the most part.
19:14
SPEAKER_00: So they sent my early 20s alcoholic ass to a party convention in Nashville.
19:19
unknown: That's how that went.
19:21
SPEAKER_00: It was a lot of fucking fun.
19:22
SPEAKER_00: Um, one night I woke up in the Hilton in my hotel room just inside the door.
19:26
SPEAKER_00: The door was shut.
19:27
SPEAKER_00: I made it home safely, but I was still fully clothed with my shoes on.
19:33
SPEAKER_00: If I wrote a book, it would be called Don't Do What I Do.
19:36
SPEAKER_01: Right there with you.
19:37
SPEAKER_00: Don't do anything I would do in my fucking yearbooks.
19:39
SPEAKER_00: And it's still true.
19:40
SPEAKER_00: Don't do anything I would do.
19:41
SPEAKER_00: Um, but it was a lot of fun.
19:42
SPEAKER_00: I got to meet a lot of musicians, I got to make a lot of cool connections, most of which I don't really use anymore because I'm not in the music space and that's not really what I do.
19:49
SPEAKER_00: But um, it was a really cool opportunity to kind of go out and see, you know, you test what you know.
19:54
SPEAKER_00: You you keep gathering the shit and you think that you know what you know the best that you know it, and then you go out and you're like, I do know this shit.
20:00
SPEAKER_00: Okay, cool.
20:01
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, it was it was cool.
20:03
SPEAKER_00: Again, like I got to do a lot of unique shit, like go see Florida, Georgia Lion played a, you know, a room of 400 people.
20:10
SPEAKER_00: Uh those dudes, oh my god, holy shit, I've never got so drunk before in a green room in my life.
20:16
SPEAKER_00: Florida at Lincoln.
20:18
SPEAKER_00: I think it was their first time they played at Pinnacle.
20:20
SPEAKER_00: It was one of the first shows at Pinnacle, if I remember correctly.
20:22
SPEAKER_00: Wow.
20:23
SPEAKER_00: Um, but they were sponsored by Fireball and Miller Light on that too.
20:27
SPEAKER_01: That explains how that went.
20:34
SPEAKER_00: I'm just you can tell I'm fucking three sheets at this point, and I was just standing there smiling with them, and he photoshopped the fucking Miller Light can to be a Coke can and he sent it into Country Air Check Weekly, which is like a weekly newsletter for the country radio.
20:49
SPEAKER_00: They printed it.
20:50
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh, painted a fucking Coke can into my hand and they printed it.
20:56
SPEAKER_00: I don't buy a picture anymore.
20:57
SPEAKER_00: I'll have to find it if I do.
20:59
SPEAKER_01: Photoshop win right there for sure.
21:02
SPEAKER_00: Amazing.
21:03
SPEAKER_00: They fucking printed it.
21:04
SPEAKER_00: Uh but no, it was cool.
21:05
SPEAKER_00: Uh it it gave me a lot of weird opportunities too.
21:08
SPEAKER_00: I got hit on a couple of times.
21:09
SPEAKER_00: That was awkward when you get hit on by a music person that you know because you talk about them and you know that they're engaged to a woman that is incredibly beautiful.
21:18
SPEAKER_00: And why the fuck is he even entertaining talking to my crazy ass?
21:21
SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm like, no, go away.
21:22
SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna out who it is, but yeah, former American Idol contestant is all I'm gonna say.
21:28
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
21:32
SPEAKER_00: We went to a concert and he was like, like hitting on me.
21:35
SPEAKER_00: And it was it was an event, it was at CRS.
21:38
SPEAKER_00: So we were on the it was on the Sony boat.
21:40
SPEAKER_00: I'll give you that much.
21:41
SPEAKER_00: You can probably figure out the rest.
21:42
SPEAKER_00: But um, we were on the Sony boat and they were like, Hey, uh, can I buy you a drink?
21:46
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, How are you gonna buy me a drink, homie?
21:48
SPEAKER_00: Everything's free.
21:49
SPEAKER_00: And he's like, Well, I just think you're gorgeous.
21:50
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, That's cool.
21:52
SPEAKER_00: So is your fucking fiance.
21:54
SPEAKER_00: And then six months later, I saw him at Country Stampede because he was a headliner and I was taking listeners to a meeting.
22:00
SPEAKER_00: Greet, and he's like, We've met before, and I'm like, You're right, we have me and she knew the whole fucking story, and she's dying.
22:09
SPEAKER_00: And he's really you could like see the hamster running that he's putting together the series of events, and he's just like, We have met, have a good day.
22:17
SPEAKER_01: I was like, That's fantastic.
22:20
SPEAKER_00: Other podcasts I would host random stories about musicians you love and the weird shit they've done.
22:25
SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
22:26
SPEAKER_01: I could probably add a few of those.
22:28
SPEAKER_00: Oh god, I think all the stories.
22:30
SPEAKER_00: Fuck, you've toured and played enough shows, like you've got some.
22:34
SPEAKER_01: I could probably shovel dirt on half the people you know in Omaha just alone.
22:42
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
22:43
SPEAKER_00: Responsibility.
22:44
SPEAKER_00: If you have to have the power, you have to have the responsibility of keeping your mouth shut.
22:48
SPEAKER_01: Uh yeah, absolutely.
22:50
SPEAKER_01: And just knowing when it's appropriate and when it's not.
22:53
SPEAKER_02: Yep.
22:54
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
22:55
SPEAKER_01: So that path to Lincoln, that's kind of what set you towards Puerto Rico, right?
23:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
23:01
SPEAKER_00: So like my husband is a ticket broker, scalper, or whatever.
23:04
SPEAKER_00: You can say whatever you want, but we moved to Puerto Rico for five years because of it, because he could work from home.
23:09
SPEAKER_00: So I came home from work one day and he's like, uh, so we went to vacation in Puerto Rico for 10 days.
23:14
SPEAKER_00: Totally not like scouting or anything.
23:16
SPEAKER_00: Like, we just went because that's like, fuck it.
23:17
SPEAKER_00: It's January, we're gonna get out of here.
23:19
SPEAKER_00: So we went for 10 days, and like I stood in the ocean on my last day in Ocean Park, and I like cried because I was never gonna be in this place again.
23:26
SPEAKER_00: I was like, I don't want to leave.
23:28
SPEAKER_00: So we go home and we're back for like two weeks, and I come home from work, and my my husband's standing at the counter and he's like, You want to move to Puerto Rico?
23:35
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, Well, can we take the cats?
23:36
SPEAKER_00: And he's like, Yeah, is that your only follow-up?
23:38
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, Yeah, let's fucking go.
23:40
SPEAKER_00: Three months later, like two months later, we uh put an offer in on a house.
23:44
SPEAKER_00: Four months later, we were there.
23:46
SPEAKER_00: Like it was like, let's go.
23:48
SPEAKER_00: Um, and it was really fucking cool.
23:50
SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm glad I did it.
23:51
SPEAKER_00: We had a lot of weird fucking baggage that came out of living there, but I'm glad I did it because I needed to do it.
23:56
SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, it got me away from my family for me to realize like that the their situation is not healthy.
24:01
SPEAKER_00: Uh, it gave me space to figure that out for myself, which I needed.
24:05
SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, I met a lot of really great people there.
24:08
SPEAKER_00: Um I've like all of my girlfriends down there are fucking amazing.
24:12
SPEAKER_00: Like that's where that's where I learned like good sisterhood can save your life.
24:17
SPEAKER_00: Like, I know it sounds fucking cheesy and it's like a hang in there fucking poster kind of a thing, but for real.
24:23
SPEAKER_00: Like when you find people that understand you, it makes existing a lot fucking.
24:28
SPEAKER_00: Um, so you know, I found those connections with those people, and then the hurricane happened, and life as we knew it was just fucking upside down.
24:36
SPEAKER_00: Um, it looked like a bomb went off.
24:38
SPEAKER_00: Like we didn't know what to do.
24:39
SPEAKER_00: Like we thought we prepared, and somehow we got through it, but like looking back at it now, we realized how grossly underprepared we were, and I'm fucking amazed that we got through it as honestly.
24:49
SPEAKER_00: It's like wow, wow.
24:51
SPEAKER_00: Like we did what we thought we could do because that's all you can do.
24:53
SPEAKER_00: They're like, hey, this thing's coming.
24:55
SPEAKER_00: It went from a fucking tropical storm to a cat five in a day.
24:58
SPEAKER_00: Good luck.
24:58
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
24:59
SPEAKER_00: Like I slept through most of it.
25:01
SPEAKER_00: That's when I started habitually smoking weed, was the day that Hurricane Maria hit.
25:05
SPEAKER_00: Thank God for that vape cartridge that got me through that storm.
25:08
SPEAKER_00: Holy shit.
25:09
SPEAKER_00: Um medicinal weed and PR was awesome as well.
25:13
SPEAKER_00: I miss that a lot because we live in a state where our governor fucking says that weed kills kids.
25:17
SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah.
25:18
SPEAKER_00: But so like it was it was a really interesting experience.
25:22
SPEAKER_00: And when you go through something like that, um, I mean, w spoiler alert, I might get a little emotional talking about this.
25:29
SPEAKER_00: Trigger warning, natural disasters, trauma dumping, potentially, probably not.
25:33
SPEAKER_00: I'll try to be not do that, but like people turn our backs their backs on us.
25:37
SPEAKER_00: Like the fucking US government turned their backs on us.
25:40
SPEAKER_00: Not my opinion.
25:41
SPEAKER_00: Actual fact, people died because of it, and a lot of fucking people died because of it, just over 4,000 to be exact.
25:47
SPEAKER_00: Like, we had such a lack of power and such a lack of clean water that people were using old dirty bleach bottles to get water from broken fire hydrants down the street to take home and drink, but you couldn't sanitize it because there was no power.
26:02
SPEAKER_02: Right.
26:02
SPEAKER_00: So people were getting fucking waterborne illnesses and dying that way.
26:06
SPEAKER_00: And then when people died, you didn't have anywhere to fucking put them because the morgues are overstuffed and there's no refrigeration.
26:11
SPEAKER_00: So, like entire hospitals had to close because of corpse stench.
26:15
SPEAKER_00: Like they brought in refrigerated trucks to put the bodies in after the fucking morgues were full.
26:20
SPEAKER_00: And guess what happened?
26:21
SPEAKER_00: We were in a diesel shortage because we were in an everything shortage because we're on an island where we're 1400 miles off fucking mainland.
26:27
SPEAKER_00: Like, it was it was a nightmare.
26:29
SPEAKER_00: It was living a fucking dystopian nightmare.
26:32
SPEAKER_00: Like, I am undoubtedly ready for the zombie apocalypse whenever the fuck that shit happens.
26:37
SPEAKER_00: Squat up with me because we got you.
26:39
SPEAKER_00: Like, I'll I'll bring the fucking machete and my life straw bag and we'll be good to go.
26:44
SPEAKER_00: Like, um, and I was talking to my husband today, actually.
26:48
SPEAKER_00: I was giggling about this when I was sitting inside reading the weather report.
26:51
SPEAKER_00: Like, in PR, before a massive storm happens, they enact what they call Le Seca, which is a dry law, which means you can't buy alcohol.
26:59
SPEAKER_00: Could you imagine here, right now, right before a blizzard comes in, if they were like, no, you can't buy any booze, people would lose their fucking minds.
27:07
SPEAKER_00: We had to ride that sober or have a good stock.
27:10
SPEAKER_00: Like, how mean is that?
27:12
SPEAKER_00: You can't even let us get lit.
27:14
SPEAKER_02: Jesus.
27:16
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
27:17
SPEAKER_00: So, like, that was fucking weird.
27:19
SPEAKER_00: That was the first time I'd ever dealt with that.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, what the what the fuck is Listeca?
27:23
SPEAKER_00: And they're like, you can't buy beer.
27:24
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, the fucking what now?
27:28
SPEAKER_00: I can't what?
27:30
SPEAKER_01: So your experience in Puerto Rico to it was awesome.
27:34
SPEAKER_00: I loved it.
27:35
SPEAKER_00: I would do it all over again, though.
27:36
SPEAKER_01: Is is that what kind of opened the doors to your current love and affinity for fitness?
27:44
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
27:45
SPEAKER_00: Um, I mean, it gave me the availability time-wise to actually be able to pursue that as a hobby.
27:50
SPEAKER_00: Uh, because before I was also working a 40-hour work week, and then I was magically a stay-at-home cat mom.
27:55
SPEAKER_00: So I had a lot of time to kill.
27:56
SPEAKER_00: Um, so I, you know, I got into fitness and uh one of our trainers back, our first personal trainer in PR, his name's Pinzone.
28:04
SPEAKER_00: Uh, he is he's amazing.
28:05
SPEAKER_00: He uh figured out how to make me enjoy it again because I am a former athlete.
28:09
SPEAKER_00: Like I was an athlete all the way up until I decided to quit playing sports right before college and start drinking full-time instead.
28:15
SPEAKER_00: Um but yeah, like they they found a way to make it fun, and it's just, I don't know.
28:22
SPEAKER_00: Like the way that they explained it to me was such a different route than anyone else had ever given me before that it just like switched the light bulb on for me.
28:30
SPEAKER_00: Like, oh shit, well, if my dumb ass can figure this shit out, then anybody can fucking figure it out.
28:35
SPEAKER_00: And I can figure it out how to put it in a way that anybody can understand it because that's the skill set I have being a you know a professional mass broadcaster.
28:42
SPEAKER_00: Like that's what they do.
28:43
SPEAKER_00: Um, so like that was kind of the thing with Meethead Test Kitchen.
28:47
SPEAKER_00: I was like, all right, cool, maybe I'll make a food blog.
28:49
SPEAKER_00: And so like I it was it was one of those things where I was like smoking a joint at like two in the morning.
28:54
SPEAKER_00: Phil was in playing video games, and I had like this legal pad.
28:58
SPEAKER_00: We we actually do write our ideas down on yellow legal pads in this house.
29:01
SPEAKER_00: It's like a sacred tradition.
29:02
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
29:03
SPEAKER_00: That's dope, but I don't have the legal pad anymore because I'm pretty sure it's like been used many times over.
29:09
SPEAKER_00: But uh it was it was an idea that lived on a fucking legal pad for a while.
29:13
SPEAKER_00: It was just meathead test kitchen, that's all it was.
29:15
SPEAKER_00: It was just a fucking name jotted on a legal pad.
29:17
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, all right, cool.
29:18
SPEAKER_00: Well, I'll buy the URL for it because that's what you do.
29:21
SPEAKER_00: If somebody has the URL and you have it, you know, you get to fucking charge them for it.
29:25
SPEAKER_00: And if I want to use it, I'll use it.
29:27
SPEAKER_00: So I parked it on my GoDaddy account or whatever, my one in one, or I don't fucking remember, but I parked it on my account and like it was there.
29:34
SPEAKER_00: So then I'm just like I decide, you know, okay, I'm gonna do something about this, we're moving back.
29:38
SPEAKER_00: And my friend Sasha, who is like, she is like, her and I are so similar that it's honestly fucking scary.
29:48
SPEAKER_00: And if you know both of us in our histories, it really is fucking scary.
29:52
SPEAKER_00: And thank God we didn't meet until after we chilled out in our late 20s.
29:56
SPEAKER_00: Because had we like, oh my god, her and I are oil and water, we would have just fucking lit the world on fire.
30:01
SPEAKER_00: Um, but so she approached me and she's like, Well, I want to do meathead test kitchen with you.
30:06
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, Well, yeah, when your hero and the person that you've always wanted to fucking work with approaches you and says, Hey, I like your idea, I want to do it.
30:15
SPEAKER_00: Obviously, you are you a god, you say yes.
30:17
SPEAKER_02: Right.
30:19
SPEAKER_00: So, so I said yeah, and like that was it.
30:21
SPEAKER_00: So then we moved back, you know, we're like spitting ideas back and forth about what we're gonna do.
30:26
SPEAKER_00: And in the meantime, our friends Pat and JT had started podcasting after they had been blown out of their previous position doing, you know, mornings.
30:35
SPEAKER_00: And I was I was an intern for them.
30:38
SPEAKER_00: They were they were my first internship job when I started with college.
30:41
SPEAKER_00: So like Sasha's like, well, I've been working with Pat and JT again.
30:44
SPEAKER_00: And like they're like, Well, if you want to do a podcast, you know, you're an employee, that'd be totally cool if you want to bring Sadie in.
30:50
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, fuck yeah, let's do it.
30:52
SPEAKER_00: And then like that happened.
30:54
SPEAKER_00: And then everything that happened after that has just been like a powder keg of really great timing.
31:01
SPEAKER_00: Like, I can't claim any of it as like skill or professionalism or expertise.
31:06
SPEAKER_00: Like, sometimes life is just a lot of fucking really good timing, and that's like what this was.
31:10
SPEAKER_00: So, like, we started doing the podcast, and then right after we started doing the podcast, the company that we were working for at the time got bought out by Herdat Media, which then has exploded into this just entire media entity in the Omaha area and in like just everywhere at this point.
31:25
SPEAKER_00: I mean, we've got, you know, like podcasters in LA and in New York, and fucking one of them podcasts and does a Bravo show uh below deck Mediterranean.
31:33
SPEAKER_00: Like, so like I to be able to be in on the ground floor of that because we were, we were one of the first like OG podcasts that Parkville, it was Parkville Media.
31:42
SPEAKER_00: Like they they brought us in at the end of the time, but like we were one of the first, like the grandfathered in set.
31:49
SPEAKER_00: Um, so to be able to say that is really fucking neat, which means we've been around for a while, um, going on three years, which is scary that I've helped come up with this many ideas weekly for this long.
32:00
SPEAKER_00: Like when you do a show like this, and I know you know this, sometimes you're just fucking amazed at the shit you actually pull out of your ass to make an episode.
32:07
SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, absolutely, absolutely.
32:12
SPEAKER_01: That is a weekly fight.
32:13
SPEAKER_01: And the thing is, is and you and I have talked about this too.
32:17
SPEAKER_01: The thing that I admire about what you guys do is you guys kind of take your topical um medium and then you address your topical medium, and you have each other to bounce off of.
32:27
SPEAKER_01: Where like my show, it's like it's guest-driven.
32:30
SPEAKER_01: So if I lose my guest for a week, it's scramble, scramble, scramble, scramble.
32:34
SPEAKER_01: And I even try and batch my episodes weeks ahead, and it's still a fucking scramble.
32:39
SPEAKER_00: People don't follow apart in that capacity, and that's what makes it difficult, and people don't say it, but that's what makes a solo host like that much more, like you have to be that much more on your shit.
32:49
SPEAKER_00: It's tough.
32:49
SPEAKER_01: Oh, absolutely, absolutely.
32:51
SPEAKER_01: And that's uh, you know, you want to forgive the human element because everybody has some shit going on.
32:59
SPEAKER_01: Everybody has some shit going on, so you have to be really creative.
33:03
SPEAKER_01: And how am I gonna pivot if I don't have an episode this week?
33:07
SPEAKER_01: If I record something solo, is it gonna come across as being somewhat narcissistic or self-serving?
33:14
SPEAKER_01: Or do I just like all right, I'm just gonna speak my truth and throw it out there in the world?
33:19
SPEAKER_00: So I mean, so here's how you look at it the way when you have to do a solo episode.
33:23
SPEAKER_00: When we have an oh shit, we gotta punt, it's usually a shorty.
33:26
SPEAKER_01: Right, absolutely.
33:29
SPEAKER_00: At the end of the day, like, and this is something that like our mentors have told us like people tune in to hear what you have to say.
33:36
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you have guests and you lead the conversation, but people tune in to hear what you have to say, so don't be afraid to take liberties in that every now and then, you know?
33:44
SPEAKER_00: Like, free advice.
33:45
SPEAKER_00: Hi, sorry, it's ha ha broadcasting advice there for you for anybody.
33:50
SPEAKER_00: Um, but like, please be better broadcasters.
33:53
SPEAKER_00: The world needs better broadcasters.
33:55
SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
33:56
SPEAKER_01: And it's like we're filming top gun three right now, and you just volied that ball up to me because I want to talk about some mindset training here.
34:07
SPEAKER_01: Um, you said three years with Meathead Test Kitchen at this point.
34:11
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, almost.
34:12
SPEAKER_00: We're we released, I think, I think we'll be recording episode 120 this week, which is fucking wild.
34:18
SPEAKER_01: So did it start pre-pandemic or post-pandemic?
34:22
SPEAKER_00: Um I'm trying to think.
34:25
SPEAKER_00: That whole thing was a blur because we moved back to to Omaha in like October of 2019, and then the whole pandemic thing happened like as soon as we put our feet back on the ground here.
34:33
SPEAKER_00: Uh so it was during pandemic, actually.
34:35
SPEAKER_00: Uh, it was like the months of the pandemic that we had started um development and like focusing, because shit about stuff that you don't realize when people make media for you, that they spend a lot of time fucking like group thinking and workshopping and worksheeting that shit out.
34:52
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
34:53
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
34:54
SPEAKER_00: People don't appreciate that.
34:56
SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't think people realize that.
34:57
SPEAKER_00: So people obviously don't appreciate it.
34:59
SPEAKER_00: Like the whole thing with demographics and figuring out like the right fucking time length for your episodes and like it's a fucking science.
35:06
SPEAKER_00: Yes, it's a science.
35:07
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
35:09
SPEAKER_00: Um, and people don't appreciate it, but you know, like they don't also don't know what goes into their show either.
35:13
SPEAKER_00: And that's why we like to talk about some of that stuff on our podcast too.
35:16
SPEAKER_00: We like to kind of pull the curtain back because we've been doing this shit for a really long time.
35:20
SPEAKER_00: So, A, we we work with people that we fucking love, so they never take anything that we say about any of our industry experience as a fucking slight or a personal shot ever because it's not.
35:30
SPEAKER_00: Um, but they let us speak fucking freely, you know, because it's I think at this point journalistic integrity is very hard to find, um, which is very frustrating as someone that is classically trained to be a broadcaster and a news journalist.
35:45
SPEAKER_00: Um, like we were talking about that today.
35:47
SPEAKER_00: At what point does clickbait just turn into a lie rag?
35:50
SPEAKER_01: Right.
35:50
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
35:51
SPEAKER_00: Like it's not writing good news copy isn't hard.
35:53
SPEAKER_00: It's not hard.
35:54
SPEAKER_00: The who, what, where, when, why.
35:55
SPEAKER_00: That's it.
35:56
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
35:56
SPEAKER_02: That's it.
35:57
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
35:57
SPEAKER_00: That's all you have to do.
35:58
SPEAKER_00: Who, what, where, when, why?
35:59
SPEAKER_00: Who did what, when, and where?
36:00
SPEAKER_00: Right.
36:01
SPEAKER_00: Is it gonna affect me?
36:02
SPEAKER_00: That's all I need to know.
36:02
SPEAKER_00: Okay, bye.
36:03
SPEAKER_00: Next article.
36:04
SPEAKER_00: Like, right.
36:05
SPEAKER_00: I don't need to know about the legendary trade of fucking Liam Hendricks, and then you don't tell me what the fucking trade actually is.
36:11
SPEAKER_00: Like that was the actual article we were just looking at because we're White Sox fans, and I'm like internally freaking out because they're gonna trade Liam Hendrix away, and I'm so sad.
36:18
SPEAKER_00: He's my favorite.
36:19
SPEAKER_00: But um, like it's it's really important, you know.
36:22
SPEAKER_00: So that is something that we take to heart with our podcast is to try to be as transparent as fucking possible with people.
36:29
SPEAKER_00: Because when you when you have a job like ours where you have to market things to people to make your money, to make your living, you have to be very careful about how you do it now.
36:38
SPEAKER_00: Because if you don't do it the right way, people are gonna think you're a fucking shill.
36:41
SPEAKER_02: Yep.
36:42
SPEAKER_00: And that is the last thing you want if you want to do this job for sustainability or as a job, period.
36:46
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
36:47
SPEAKER_00: Like, if you want to be a good journalist, you have to fucking learn how to be honest with people without pissing them off.
36:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
36:52
SPEAKER_00: And that also is a skill.
36:53
SPEAKER_00: But like we tell people straight up, like, yo, we're gonna sell you shit.
36:56
SPEAKER_00: That's how sometimes we make money this way.
36:58
SPEAKER_00: Like, this is what we do for a job.
37:00
SPEAKER_00: But it's gonna be shit we actually use.
37:01
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be shit that we actually like by people that we actually know.
37:04
SPEAKER_00: Like, so there's there's always ways to approach it where you can be transparent with people, but people are afraid to do that for some reason.
37:13
SPEAKER_00: And then it just bites them in the ass, like like that liver king dude, or you know, like any of the other fucking people that you see.
37:20
SPEAKER_00: Uh, that lady that got sued because she said she was like an eating disorder uh specialist, and then she had no nutritional or dietitian certifications whatsoever.
37:29
SPEAKER_00: Like, do the smell test, please.
37:32
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but there's a duality to it too.
37:34
SPEAKER_01: Like the transparency is really important, being authentic, being honest, that's gonna engage people and get people to invest in you long term.
37:41
SPEAKER_01: But there's also the easy clickbait part of it, though, too.
37:46
SPEAKER_01: Like, I talk to people about that all the time with my podcast.
37:49
SPEAKER_01: Like, if I want more engagement or if I want more people to click, I could take today's biggest political issue, give my two cents on it, and that's gonna get me both more negative clicks and positive clicks.
38:00
SPEAKER_01: Whoever falls into my echo chamber, if you will.
38:02
SPEAKER_00: Well, and it's also like what energy do you want to put out there?
38:06
SPEAKER_00: Do you want energy out that's gonna get 25 shitheads in your fucking comments calling you, or do you just want to not fucking say anything and go on with your day like a happy normal person?
38:15
SPEAKER_01: Right, right.
38:16
SPEAKER_01: And that's right, right.
38:18
SPEAKER_01: And that's the thing.
38:19
SPEAKER_01: Like, being a guest-driven podcast like mine, it's like it's not hard to read between the lines where I stand on things based on my actions as opposed to me giving my two cents on something.
38:32
SPEAKER_01: Like, there's enough of us out there, especially in the podcast field, to where they're gonna give their two cents out on different topics, they don't know shit about it, whether they want to or not, right?
38:43
SPEAKER_00: And they always yell the loudest, unfortunately, which people end up listening, and it's sad, but that's life.
38:49
SPEAKER_01: Especially in the space that you're in in recent years, you know, the reason I asked about the the uh pandemic part of it, and I said I wanted to kind of get some mindset coaching and you know, getting that thought process out is I feel like my podcast in particular, and I think this might happen to you guys as well.
39:08
SPEAKER_01: Um, the pandemic is the elephant in the room that we always circle back to for some reason or another.
39:14
SPEAKER_01: And being a kind of a fitness guy myself, the pandemic fucked me up.
39:19
SPEAKER_00: Oh god, it fucked everybody up.
39:21
SPEAKER_00: It it was a giant disruption and routine.
39:24
SPEAKER_00: Like the pandemic was a national catastrophe as to what we saw with the hurricane.
39:28
SPEAKER_00: It was just a different set of circumstances, like we were filtering in place, like that shit was serious, right?
39:34
SPEAKER_01: Right, and that's the thing, and like I felt like I was at my best before, and this is me being transparent about myself.
39:40
SPEAKER_01: Um I was so before pandemic.
39:43
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
39:43
SPEAKER_01: Right, that's just it.
39:44
SPEAKER_01: It's like I was like, oh my gosh, I'm like, I am in the best shape of my life, and then boom, gym shut down.
39:51
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, okay, I am not a person that does well with working out at home.
39:55
SPEAKER_01: I don't.
39:56
SPEAKER_01: I need that routine and that discipline of going somewhere and forcing myself out of my comfort zone, or else I'm not gonna do it.
40:03
SPEAKER_00: But it's also the social aspect too, right?
40:06
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
40:07
SPEAKER_00: For us, it was just as much a social aspect as it was like the physical aspect.
40:11
SPEAKER_00: Um, before pandemic hit, I was snatch deadlifting uh 205.
40:18
SPEAKER_00: I was I was squatting, I was squatting 205 too.
40:22
SPEAKER_00: Uh I was at like 155, 160 body weight at that point.
40:26
SPEAKER_00: I was super fucking strong.
40:27
SPEAKER_00: Uh, I was doing clean complexes at like 130 pounds.
40:30
SPEAKER_00: Like it was it was awesome.
40:32
SPEAKER_00: Uh and then pandemic hit, and like I, of course, like fight or flight mode kicked in, and like all of my fucking PTSD from the hurricane like mixed with the like the last five years of my life have been different shades of PTSD flavors like intermingled into one giant fucking spaghetti monster of garbage.
40:52
SPEAKER_00: Um, but I feel like that's not unique to me.
40:54
SPEAKER_00: I feel like that's like that's a lot of people's thing, and that's why we talk about mental health so much as we do on our podcast.
41:00
SPEAKER_00: Because like if if working on the internet has taught me anything, and Sasha will say this too.
41:06
SPEAKER_00: Um like you think your thoughts are unique to you?
41:09
SPEAKER_00: No.
41:10
SPEAKER_00: Right.
41:10
SPEAKER_00: Like, like, yeah, it might be unique in your group of friends to you, but your thoughts aren't you like if there's one thing that I've learned is that if you have a thought, someone else has thought about it and already pondered the thought on TikTok.
41:22
SPEAKER_01: Right.
41:23
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, absolutely.
41:25
SPEAKER_00: And it's it's scary and it's vain and it's freaky, but also comforting at the same time.
41:30
SPEAKER_00: Um, so you know, I'm really glad that at least that part of pandemic brought mental health to the forefront because people were using mental health for a lot of bullshit excuses to bad policy and bad behavior, and they still do.
41:41
SPEAKER_00: And I'm not gonna get too deep into that because that's another podcast episode for another fucking day.
41:46
SPEAKER_00: However, um, it is nice to now be able to like, I look at like my interpersonal relationships, especially like people I work with.
41:53
SPEAKER_00: I can be completely transparent about how I'm feeling because they fucking listen to my podcast, they've heard all my fucking baggage, like they know right.
41:59
SPEAKER_00: So I have to be like, oh, well, I just don't.
42:02
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I can't today.
42:03
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, okay, we'll rebook it.
42:04
SPEAKER_00: Cool, no big deal.
42:06
SPEAKER_00: But like, um, I was talking, you know, the other day to uh somebody about it, and I was like, it's great.
42:11
SPEAKER_00: I had a conversation with my boss the other day, and my imposter syndrome came up, and I was like, God, my imposter syndrome, it's a motherfucker.
42:17
SPEAKER_00: And like he he just like went on and was like, yeah, you know, like didn't avoid it, didn't make me feel weird.
42:23
SPEAKER_00: Like he's like, Yep, okay, cool.
42:24
SPEAKER_00: We're gonna laugh about this because I'm gonna make a joke and then we're gonna keep talking about what we're talking about.
42:28
SPEAKER_00: It's like, thank you, yeah, thank you.
42:30
SPEAKER_00: Yes, um, but you know, I think I think pandemic pandemic helped in that aspect, but it also hurt us because we did go into isolation mode, and I'm still guilty of it because I'm still fucking paranoid.
42:42
SPEAKER_00: I got trust issues, and I don't trust that people around me aren't doing the right thing to not keep me sick, and that's not a slight on anybody, but like shit happens, I'm overly cautious, right?
42:52
SPEAKER_00: Always, always been overly cautious.
42:53
SPEAKER_00: So I'm just like, I've made it this far without COVID, I'm not fucking stopping at this point.
42:57
SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
42:58
SPEAKER_00: Um, but like it it also took away a lot of human elements of our life, and that has made things, especially dealing with other people, a lot more difficult.
43:08
SPEAKER_00: People before, when you were a broadcast media host, they would call and make fun of you if you said something stupid every now and then.
43:15
SPEAKER_00: Like now, now when you do a TikTok live, there's any gaggle of stupid bullshit of just bot throwaway comments that are just vulcan, stupid.
43:26
SPEAKER_00: Um, people throwing, you know, homophobic slurs at me because, oh, guess what?
43:32
SPEAKER_00: Half my head's shaved, so I must be a lesbian.
43:34
SPEAKER_00: Spoiler alert, you're half right, motherfuckers, and there's nothing wrong with being gay.
43:39
SPEAKER_00: Um, like I just I get sick of it.
43:41
SPEAKER_00: Like, we were doing TikTok lives for a while, and they were fun until they weren't.
43:45
SPEAKER_00: Um, and they quit being fun one day when someone called my co host fat, and she has recovered from disordered eating before.
43:52
SPEAKER_00: Like, that was my fucking I'm done.
43:55
SPEAKER_00: So, like people are really abusive to.
44:00
SPEAKER_00: Those that entertain them.
44:01
SPEAKER_00: And it's like you don't fucking understand that we are existing to try to make your life slightly less shitty, but yet here you are being a raging dickbag.
44:10
SPEAKER_00: Go to therapy.
44:11
SPEAKER_00: Fuck.
44:12
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and the thing is, is they were the state of society post-pandemic emboldened a lot of those people.
44:19
SPEAKER_00: Oh, well, the fucking dude that was in the big chair didn't help either, you know?
44:23
SPEAKER_00: Like when you have dickhead and chief in office, like that the the loveliness of like people's secret diswant to just be fucking mean to everybody for no reason.
44:35
SPEAKER_00: Like the fuck your feelings flags.
44:37
SPEAKER_00: It's like, what are you accomplishing with that other than telling me that you're a fucking idiot, first of all, and that you're an asshole.
44:43
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for I avoid you at all fucking costs.
44:46
SPEAKER_00: Have a good day.
44:47
SPEAKER_01: Right, right.
44:47
SPEAKER_01: Like and people make that their whole identity.
44:50
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
44:50
SPEAKER_00: Like you make your whole identity being a raging dickbag.
44:55
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
44:56
SPEAKER_00: Well, what?
44:57
SPEAKER_00: What does he fucking do for you?
44:59
SPEAKER_00: Like, what does he enrich your life with other than stupid bullshit word salads and asking you for money because he's a fucking snake oil salesman?
45:07
SPEAKER_00: Like, goddamn, that guy is a great grifter.
45:09
SPEAKER_00: I'll give him that if I have to give him a fucking compliment.
45:12
SPEAKER_00: That man can fucking sell a popsicle to anybody.
45:16
SPEAKER_00: He priced Bama NFTs with ripped off fucking shit from clothing on Amazon.
45:22
SPEAKER_00: Like, those are oh my god, did you even see them?
45:24
SPEAKER_01: Oh, I didn't, I couldn't even I couldn't make it through the commercial.
45:28
SPEAKER_01: My wife sent me the commercial, she just sent me the Twitter leak, and I'm like, and all I I watched like two seconds of it and I sent it back to her.
45:35
SPEAKER_01: I was just like, you know, this is serious.
45:37
SPEAKER_01: This is not parody.
45:39
SPEAKER_00: He's serious, and they're bad.
45:41
SPEAKER_00: They're seriously bad.
45:42
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, everything about it is serious, including how shitty they are.
45:46
SPEAKER_00: Um, like one of them, he's like Superman, and he's got these quads that are like I don't know, man.
45:53
SPEAKER_00: It was it was ridiculous.
45:55
SPEAKER_00: I was like, what the f like this is obviously fake, and you don't even have any shame that this is obviously fucking fake.
46:01
SPEAKER_01: Right, absolutely.
46:03
SPEAKER_00: Anyway, fuck Donald Trump because he ruined my life when I lived in Puerto Rico.
46:07
SPEAKER_00: But back to any and back to talking about mindset training, despite the people that deserve it.
46:12
SPEAKER_00: Uh, like you don't have to be nice to everybody, not everybody deserves your fucking kindness.
46:16
SPEAKER_01: Right.
46:17
SPEAKER_00: He doesn't deserve kindness from me.
46:19
SPEAKER_00: He made my life shitty, so I'm gonna be an asshole back to him.
46:21
SPEAKER_00: Fuck that guy.
46:22
SPEAKER_00: But like it's it's it's a two-way street, and we talk about that a lot, especially on our mental health check episodes.
46:28
SPEAKER_00: Like, if someone's got beef with you, well, check your side of the street.
46:31
SPEAKER_00: Do you have shit on your side?
46:32
SPEAKER_00: Is your shit clean?
46:33
SPEAKER_00: Okay, if your shit's clean, then fuck them for having beef because you didn't do anything.
46:37
SPEAKER_02: Right.
46:37
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
46:38
SPEAKER_00: Like it you get what you give, but also at the same time, if all you're given is bullshit and you're tired of it, you don't have to fucking deal with it anymore.
46:47
SPEAKER_01: Right.
46:47
SPEAKER_01: You don't and this is a question that I ask myself frequently is how do you bring yourself back to a place where you were pre-pandemic?
46:56
SPEAKER_01: Or is that even possible?
46:58
SPEAKER_00: You know, I think about that a lot.
47:00
SPEAKER_00: I I feel like we all long for like 2006 to 2015.
47:05
SPEAKER_00: Like that was the best.
47:06
SPEAKER_00: Um, but it was, but it wasn't, but it was.
47:10
SPEAKER_00: Um, but like I it's hard.
47:12
SPEAKER_00: Like I think about that a lot.
47:14
SPEAKER_00: And I think about how we're probably never gonna go back to that.
47:17
SPEAKER_02: Right.
47:18
SPEAKER_00: Um that makes me really sad because we're never we're never gonna have what we had before because this thing is just ever evolving and we can't seem to just fucking catch it yet.
47:28
SPEAKER_00: So like this is life for a while and it sucks.
47:31
SPEAKER_00: Um I I it's it's really hard to think about sometimes because I think about like my nieces and nephews, and like this is this is their life now.
47:39
SPEAKER_00: This is what we fucking gave them, this is what we fucking did for them.
47:42
SPEAKER_00: Sorry, yeah, sorry we couldn't do better.
47:44
SPEAKER_00: Like we fucking tried, but people older than us fucking screwed us over.
47:48
SPEAKER_00: Like that shit's hard.
47:50
SPEAKER_00: Um I also tried to like tell myself not to do that, even though it's tempting to do it sometimes because that's a thing with being sad.
47:58
SPEAKER_00: It's like comfy sweatpants when you're used to it, and sometimes you want that comfort.
48:02
SPEAKER_00: Um, so then I try to think about okay, well, what's changed for me since then?
48:05
SPEAKER_00: How have I grown?
48:06
SPEAKER_00: And you know, what is different for me now?
48:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, things look different, but how has that changed me to be a different, better person?
48:13
SPEAKER_00: And it can be hard sometimes to, you know, flip the script on yourself like that.
48:17
SPEAKER_00: And we talk about we talk about that a lot when we do our we do mental health checks at the end of every month because we learned very quickly after doing our first one that everybody's got baggage and nobody wants to talk about it.
48:27
SPEAKER_00: So if you're brave and talk about it in front of a microphone, sometimes people will email you and be like, hey, thanks for talking about that.
48:33
SPEAKER_00: Because I deal with this really fucked up shit too.
48:35
SPEAKER_00: And then it's helpful to both of us because then I don't feel alone, you don't feel alone, you can identify your problems and hopefully find some fucking help for them.
48:42
SPEAKER_00: Like it's there's never anything for me bad that comes out of talking about my feelings.
48:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'll talk about my feelings and I'll talk about negative feelings I have towards my fucking family.
48:51
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and that's fine.
48:52
SPEAKER_00: They can be mad all day long, they're the ones that were fucking shitty.
48:55
SPEAKER_02: Right.
48:56
SPEAKER_00: I was a kid, I was a fucking kid, I didn't do anything wrong.
48:59
SPEAKER_00: I was a goddamn child.
49:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, they were the ones that were fucking shitty, and if they've got problems with it, then they can fucking deal with it because I have closed that door and moved on.
49:09
SPEAKER_00: Like, it's it's if it's not fucking worth your time, don't make it fucking worth your time.
49:13
SPEAKER_00: Like, your time is way more valuable than that, and so is your fucking energy.
49:17
SPEAKER_01: Yes, and that's something you and I have connected on a lot because I am also a person that is self-alienated from both of my biological parents.
49:26
SPEAKER_01: And uh admittedly, sometimes it gets a little hard, specifically around the holidays and big major events and such.
49:33
SPEAKER_01: But the rest of the year, I know that I'm living in a better place, having that toxicity completely away from me.
49:42
SPEAKER_01: And and occasionally, you know, I'll have siblings try and reach out and bring that toxicity back in.
49:48
SPEAKER_01: And it's just a nightmare.
49:49
SPEAKER_01: It is an ever-living nightmare whenever I know that part my life is better off without that crazy in it.
49:57
SPEAKER_00: And it sucks that you have to say that.
49:59
SPEAKER_00: Like, it's not a fun thing to say.
50:01
SPEAKER_00: Nobody wants to say, fuck my entire family.
50:03
SPEAKER_00: Right.
50:04
SPEAKER_00: Like, and the thing that I try to tell people, like when I decided that I was, because I'd mold this decision over for a really long time.
50:11
SPEAKER_00: First of all, when someone breaks ties with their families like that, it is a years-long decision in the making.
50:17
SPEAKER_00: Years long.
50:18
SPEAKER_00: This was a decision I'd been contemplating since I was probably like 19 years old.
50:21
SPEAKER_00: I'm 34, so almost half my life.
50:24
SPEAKER_00: Um, it is a decision that you know nothing about.
50:28
SPEAKER_00: You can't even fucking imagine the circumstances because you had a normal, healthy family life.
50:33
SPEAKER_00: Nothing I'm going to tell you is going to change your mind, but it is going to make you incredibly sad and probably make you look at me in a completely different light.
50:41
SPEAKER_00: Like, if you don't want to know, don't ask.
50:43
SPEAKER_00: Just when someone says no, I don't talk to my family anymore, don't give them the fucking 21 questions.
50:49
SPEAKER_00: That's none of your goddamn business.
50:50
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be hard for them to bring up.
50:52
SPEAKER_00: You don't want to see them cry.
50:54
SPEAKER_00: People are open books, but need to know when they're willing to be an open book.
50:58
SPEAKER_00: And I feel like for a lot of people, especially for like for me, it's fine.
51:01
SPEAKER_00: I can do it in a controlled situation like this where we talk about it because you know what I'm talking about.
51:05
SPEAKER_00: Like, it's it's different.
51:08
SPEAKER_00: But like in a in a situation where like someone's like, Oh my god, you don't talk to your mom anymore.
51:12
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, No, she's a fucking bitch.
51:15
SPEAKER_01: Do you ever get people that kind of respond to you when they do pose that 21 questions?
51:21
SPEAKER_01: Like, well, maybe you're the problem.
51:24
SPEAKER_00: Maybe I am the problem, but I wasn't the problem when I was a 12-year-old child.
51:28
SPEAKER_00: Right, yes, yes.
51:29
SPEAKER_01: That is something I get all too well, all too well.
51:32
SPEAKER_01: I've been on my own since I was 16.
51:34
SPEAKER_01: And the thing is, is like the line that I throw out to people is like, I have had every opportunity to be a fucking statistic.
51:42
SPEAKER_01: I should be a statistic.
51:45
SPEAKER_01: Like, you know, I I should be homeless, I should be addicted to gutter problems, right?
51:52
SPEAKER_01: Right.
51:52
SPEAKER_01: I should be homeless, addicted to multiple substances, whatever, but like I rose above it, and I think that actually speaks more than the actual alienation itself.
52:03
SPEAKER_01: It's like reward that.
52:06
SPEAKER_01: Realize that I made a I made a decision to better my life and by extension my kids and my family's life by you know disassociating with that part portion of my life for the betterment.
52:19
SPEAKER_01: And I don't think people do get that.
52:20
SPEAKER_01: I don't think people that had better upbringings, so you and I get that.
52:24
SPEAKER_00: They don't, um, because my husband had a pretty like his parents were divorced, but his mom was like his and still is super present in his life, and his dad is too, but like um, like there are times where I'll explain stuff to him and like the the look, the simultaneous look of just sheer heartbreak and utter confusion at the same time.
52:42
SPEAKER_00: Um, that's hard.
52:44
SPEAKER_00: But like for me, for me, I look at I look at it as an opportunity to be a new person.
52:51
SPEAKER_00: I mean, you're making a clean break.
52:53
SPEAKER_00: You shut that entire part of your life off.
52:55
SPEAKER_00: Now you are in the driver's seat and you get to decide what you do.
52:58
SPEAKER_00: And I feel like the fucking person that I am now, regardless of being a shitty delinquent, fucking teenage vandal alcoholic at age 14, like coming from that to turn into the quasi nor I mean normal person that I am.
53:16
SPEAKER_00: I mean, I'm still not normal, but like Sasha and I say a lot, like it's fucking amazing that we are as normal as we are given our fucked up childhoods.
53:22
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, I think that's a testament to how much fucking humility and hard work we put into us not being shitty people, though.
53:29
SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, that is so true.
53:33
SPEAKER_00: That's what I end on every time when I when I think about that, because I'm really good at compartmentalizing things.
53:38
SPEAKER_00: That's that's a thing I do.
53:39
SPEAKER_00: Um, but that's always like the box I end up on when I when I have to open those emotions up.
53:44
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, you know what?
53:45
SPEAKER_00: No, I have done all of these fucking things without their help, and they're mad or they're jealous.
53:53
SPEAKER_00: I don't fucking care.
53:54
SPEAKER_00: I try not to psychoanalyze my family.
53:56
SPEAKER_00: That's a deal I made with myself and a couple of my therapists along the way.
54:00
SPEAKER_00: But like, I don't care what their baggage is, I don't care what their beef is, they can fucking hate me all they want.
54:06
SPEAKER_00: But the fact of the matter is, I exited their lives completely almost three years ago.
54:11
SPEAKER_00: So if they're still talking shit on me after me not even being around, that says more fucking shit about them than it does about me.
54:18
SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
54:19
SPEAKER_00: I'm not the one fucking holding court, spilling the bochinche over here.
54:23
SPEAKER_00: Like and and it sucks because like I had to sever ties with my nieces.
54:27
SPEAKER_00: Like my sister's kids were great, they're fucking hilarious, they're smart as shit, they're amazing.
54:32
SPEAKER_00: Like they're incredibly talented dancers.
54:35
SPEAKER_00: Like my niece was the lead in the fucking community play that just happened.
54:38
SPEAKER_00: Like, can't say anything, can't congratulate her because she probably fucking hates me at this point after my mom and my sister feeding her all the bullshit, but like that sucks.
54:47
SPEAKER_00: And like when people look at a relationship ending like that, I don't think they also take those things into consideration.
54:52
SPEAKER_00: I had to sever ties with my oldest niece who I lived with for the first year and a half of her life.
55:00
SPEAKER_00: You think that wasn't fucking difficult for me?
55:02
SPEAKER_01: Right.
55:03
SPEAKER_01: No, man.
55:04
SPEAKER_00: You think I made this decision to tell them to get fucked on a whim?
55:08
SPEAKER_01: Like, oh my gosh.
55:11
SPEAKER_00: People need to give more credit to people that live through shit that they just can't fathom.
55:15
SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, because I I have a similar, uh, similar parallel, like explaining to my 16-year-old daughter and my 13-year-old son why they don't have a relationship with the grandparents on my side of the family.
55:28
SPEAKER_01: And it's like no, so it's like it's like, well, I'd like to have a grandma and a grandpa on your side, and it's like it's better that you don't, you know.
55:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'd like you to as well, but that's not how this is gonna work.
55:40
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, absolutely.
55:43
SPEAKER_00: But the older they get, you can only hope that like they go in on their own journey and they see those things later.
55:49
SPEAKER_00: And that's that's what I keep like telling myself when that shit bugs me, because that shit bugs me sometimes.
55:55
SPEAKER_00: It always does.
55:56
SPEAKER_00: You can say that you're cool with it and that it's a it is a decision I made, and it's a decision I made a while ago, and it's a decision I'm still glad that I made, but it doesn't mean that I'm not gonna second guess it from time to time.
56:04
SPEAKER_01: Oh, absolutely.
56:07
SPEAKER_00: Like that's a hard one.
56:08
SPEAKER_00: Like cutting off ties with people that should be in your life that aren't for whatever reason because they suck.
56:14
SPEAKER_00: When we got married, oof, dude, when we got married, this is this is my mother to a T for you.
56:20
SPEAKER_00: So we got married, we eloped, and like five total people knew about it because I didn't want my family at my wedding because they would find a fucking way to ruin it, and goddammit, they still fucking tried, even though they were in Iowa.
56:30
SPEAKER_00: So uh we FaceTimed them after we got married, and the first thing my mom says is not congratulations, not that's awesome.
56:36
SPEAKER_00: Oh, we thought he'd dump you before he'd ever marry you.
56:40
SPEAKER_00: My fucking mother said that to me on my wedding day, and that's why that fucking bitch wasn't invited.
56:47
SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh.
56:49
SPEAKER_00: We can cry wolf and say, My daughter hates me for reasons I don't even know.
56:53
SPEAKER_00: It's because you're a bitch.
56:56
SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, we could probably spar about this for hours.
57:00
SPEAKER_01: Like, similar thing with my dad, like my graduation day.
57:03
SPEAKER_01: I didn't get a graduation from high school, I didn't get a traditional congratulations, son, I'm proud of you.
57:08
SPEAKER_01: I got this big long letter about how I didn't acknowledge him for all of my accomplishments uh in life up to that point, that I needed to acknowledge him.
57:20
SPEAKER_01: And I was just like, How narcissistic do you need to be?
57:25
SPEAKER_00: I have a big problem with people that live vicariously through their children.
57:28
SPEAKER_00: I got a big problem.
57:30
SPEAKER_01: He wasn't even trying to live vicariously through me.
57:32
SPEAKER_01: I was living on my own, my senior year of high school.
57:36
SPEAKER_01: I still graduated with high marks, I still did uh extracurricular activities, I was working full time, and it's like, what do I need to thank you for?
57:45
SPEAKER_01: The fact that I just struggled through my senior year and supported myself when other high schoolers are out like living their best lives.
57:54
SPEAKER_00: Dude, yeah, what do you want me to thank you for?
57:55
SPEAKER_00: The parent vacation of myself that I had to do because you weren't around.
58:00
SPEAKER_00: Like, that's always a fun one to explain when people come over and I make a meal and they're like, Oh, how'd you learn to cook?
58:05
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, because my parents weren't around.
58:07
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
58:08
SPEAKER_00: Crickets, I know how to end a conversation real quick with something nice, short, and fucking sad.
58:14
SPEAKER_00: It's it's uncanny.
58:15
SPEAKER_00: I am Wednesday Adams.
58:17
SPEAKER_00: I I feel uh it's it's shit like that where people ask like a totally, I hate when I do it.
58:21
SPEAKER_00: I always feel bad when I do it, but it is kind of funny because it's the same look on people's faces every time.
58:26
SPEAKER_00: When you say something that is completely factual about your life, but they were not expecting something so fucking dark.
58:32
SPEAKER_00: Right.
58:33
unknown: Like, oh, what do you want to cook?
58:35
SPEAKER_00: They probably were like, Oh, it's a cooking class.
58:37
SPEAKER_00: And no, my parents weren't around.
58:38
SPEAKER_00: I watched a lot of Food Network.
58:40
SPEAKER_00: Emerald Gassi taught me how to cook.
58:41
SPEAKER_00: Bam.
58:42
SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't know.
58:43
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
58:44
SPEAKER_00: Dad, sorry, I just brought the room down again.
58:46
SPEAKER_00: That's kind of what I do.
58:48
SPEAKER_00: But it's it's interesting when your parents react to your own successes and try to say that you owe them for things.
58:55
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, what do I owe you for?
58:57
SPEAKER_00: The negative lunch balance I was shamed for for every day for a month and a half until you would decide to write me a check to pay my school lunch.
59:05
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, thanks for that.
59:06
SPEAKER_00: Thanks for making me feel like a fucking loser.
59:09
SPEAKER_00: Like, what else do you want me to thank you for?
59:12
SPEAKER_00: The fucking baggage that you gave me?
59:14
SPEAKER_00: The fucking passenger that always sits on my shoulder yelling at me because I have an inner critic that is so fierce because my mother was my biggest critic instead of being my biggest support system?
59:24
SPEAKER_00: Like, oh God, the things that you could talk to people about when you have unsupportive parents that they would never fucking understand.
59:30
SPEAKER_01: Like kind of tying this in, do you think that that's what fuels your because you mentioned imposter syndrome, but do you think those experiences are what fuel your imposter syndrome?
59:41
SPEAKER_00: Um, I mean, yeah, it's it's tough because the I've I've done a lot of self-help book reading since uh I had the conversation with my friend who's a therapist that made me have the realization that my mom was shitty and abusive.
59:56
SPEAKER_00: Uh that's always fun too.
59:57
SPEAKER_00: When you're talking to your friend who's a therapist and they talk to you back, and it's like, well, it's not your fault.
1:00:01
SPEAKER_00: You were just a kid.
1:00:02
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, wait, why are you talking to me like an abuse victim?
1:00:05
SPEAKER_00: Right.
1:00:06
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
1:00:06
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
1:00:08
SPEAKER_00: Well, after that happened, like I did a whole lot deep diving into like my my Myers Briggs.
1:00:13
SPEAKER_00: Like, I totally buy into that bullshit.
1:00:15
SPEAKER_00: INTJ to the core.
1:00:16
SPEAKER_00: That is fucking me to a T.
1:00:18
SPEAKER_00: Uh, no, that's why no girls understand me.
1:00:20
SPEAKER_00: It's because my brain is not the built the same as theirs.
1:00:23
SPEAKER_00: But like I learned a lot about that.
1:00:25
SPEAKER_00: Um, that was super beneficial for me because it learned or it helped me learn kind of what my subliminal cues are for other people.
1:00:32
SPEAKER_00: Um, because I've learned to really mask my feelings until I am to the point where I am ready to explode and it will go from zero to five thousand in no time.
1:00:41
SPEAKER_00: And everyone is just left like in awe of what just happened.
1:00:44
SPEAKER_00: They're like, What?
1:00:46
SPEAKER_00: You were like cool, and then you weren't.
1:00:48
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, you couldn't tell I was getting pissed off, and they're like, No.
1:00:52
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, Oh shit.
1:00:53
SPEAKER_00: So then I realized that was a problem.
1:00:55
SPEAKER_00: Um but like a lot of reading, a lot of you know, imposter syndrome is just I feel like if you are a highly competitive person that works in a in a performance-based setting, I mean we all kind of do to an extent, but something public as like a media personality or a musician or an actor, any anything like that.
1:01:18
SPEAKER_00: If you are like capital C or lowercase C celebrity, like this is something you deal with.
1:01:24
SPEAKER_00: Because it doesn't matter.
1:01:26
SPEAKER_00: There are always so many other opinions of people that you don't even know that you don't need to hear that can fuck with you.
1:01:32
SPEAKER_00: And that shit can throw you off course.
1:01:33
SPEAKER_00: And that's why I like I lead a very like squeaky clean.
1:01:38
SPEAKER_00: I have really curated my social media lawn because of this.
1:01:41
SPEAKER_00: Because if I let that shit go untamed, my imposter syndrome will drive me into a hole and I will never create another another fucking episode of me head test kitchen ever again.
1:01:50
SPEAKER_00: Like if I let what other people think about me drive how I do my shit, that's a problem.
1:01:56
SPEAKER_00: I don't give a fuck about what my family thinks about me, so I shouldn't give a fuck about what some stranger on the internet thinks, but for some reason you do.
1:02:02
SPEAKER_00: Like it doesn't make any sense.
1:02:05
SPEAKER_00: But it's it's something that I have to keep in check a lot.
1:02:08
SPEAKER_00: Um, and that is something that, yes, when I started doing this, I wanted to make goddamn sure that I had the certifications to back all this shit up in the event that somebody does call me on something that they consider bullshit.
1:02:20
SPEAKER_00: That's why we have, you know, show notes with all of our citations that we use to create the episodes.
1:02:25
SPEAKER_00: That's why I'm an ISSA certified personal trainer and nutrition coach.
1:02:28
SPEAKER_00: I'm getting my strength trainer certification.
1:02:30
SPEAKER_00: Like to us, that shit really matters.
1:02:33
SPEAKER_00: Um, but it's also reassurance for us internally as much as it is for you externally, as you know, like a listener or a fan or a whatever.
1:02:41
SPEAKER_00: Um, because your credentials do matter.
1:02:43
SPEAKER_00: Like that shit matters, especially when you're talking about someone's health.
1:02:47
SPEAKER_01: Kind of going onto the imposter syndrome thing.
1:02:50
SPEAKER_01: I think sometimes when you've had a certain amount of failures and successes balance each other out, a lot of times we fixate more on the failures than pay attention to the successes.
1:03:03
SPEAKER_01: So it's really over easy to overlook those moments when you're being successful and you are breaking through because you're still trying to apologize for what those moments you fell short.
1:03:13
SPEAKER_01: So it only increases the exponent of the imposter syndrome.
1:03:17
SPEAKER_01: And like with our upbringing and our backgrounds with our family being the way that they were, there is still, and you touched on this early in the episode, there's still that want for validation to a certain extent, too.
1:03:31
SPEAKER_00: That's hard.
1:03:32
SPEAKER_00: Like that when so we just we just cemented a really cool thing that we're gonna get to do next month that I can't talk about yet because we haven't released it.
1:03:40
SPEAKER_00: But the first person I called was not my mother, because I couldn't, because she's not gonna be happy for me.
1:03:46
SPEAKER_00: She'll have something shitty to say about my accomplishment.
1:03:48
SPEAKER_00: So I'm my friends.
1:03:51
SPEAKER_00: I was like, hey, check this shit out.
1:03:52
SPEAKER_00: And they're like, fuck yeah, that's what you need.
1:03:55
SPEAKER_00: That's what you need.
1:03:56
SPEAKER_00: If you don't have fucking family to give that to you, go seek that shit out in your friends.
1:04:00
SPEAKER_00: And I will say that having a shitty family life has made me extremely, extremely good at vetting the people I let into my friend circles.
1:04:08
SPEAKER_00: And when that shit goes sour, I take it incredibly hard because I I fucking vet people.
1:04:14
SPEAKER_00: Like I don't I used to just let people in and just be like the fucking party person that had all the friends, and I was miserable.
1:04:21
SPEAKER_00: I was fucking miserable.
1:04:22
SPEAKER_00: I have like five friends and four cats now, and it's great.
1:04:25
SPEAKER_01: A couple episodes ago, I was talking to one of the local music promoters in Omaha, and we were talking about how important it is to keep those circles small and meaningful.
1:04:37
SPEAKER_01: And I I told him, you know, because he he was talking about how there's a lot of uh disingenuous behavior around the Omaha music scene in particular, just to use it as an example.
1:04:47
SPEAKER_01: But it's everywhere, it's everywhere, right?
1:04:50
SPEAKER_01: But I said, I said, you know, the thing that I learned years ago, you know, I trim down my circle, I make it small.
1:04:56
SPEAKER_01: If I want to see my friends list triple overnight, I'll announce that I'm starting a new band.
1:05:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:05:02
SPEAKER_01: People have an attachment to your accomplishments, and sometimes you can't even recognize that within yourself.
1:05:09
SPEAKER_00: That sucks.
1:05:10
SPEAKER_00: Um, and like that is something that when I see entertainers leave us, that is the thing that they struggle with because that is the thing that I struggle with at my core as someone that has a job where I talk about shit.
1:05:22
SPEAKER_00: Um, the why the fuck does my opinion matter bug strikes often?
1:05:27
SPEAKER_00: Um, but when your brain is a jerk, sometimes it is so incredibly hard to see through the trees and see what you actually have done behind you that all you see is darkness and more trees in front of you.
1:05:40
SPEAKER_00: And that shit's tough.
1:05:41
SPEAKER_00: Um and that's taken a lot of great entertainers from us, you know.
1:05:45
SPEAKER_00: It's taken a lot of great people from us in general.
1:05:47
SPEAKER_00: Like, you always have to try to find the forest through the trees.
1:05:51
SPEAKER_00: Um, and that that can look different for anybody, but like that is for me one of like the hardest things is when I am not.
1:06:00
SPEAKER_00: Good, I am really not good, and it's like, well, why why does anything I do fucking matter?
1:06:05
SPEAKER_00: And then it's like, okay, you know, that's when you have somebody else.
1:06:09
SPEAKER_00: For me, it's my husband.
1:06:10
SPEAKER_00: He's like, All right, all right, all right.
1:06:12
SPEAKER_00: And he doesn't like get demeaning or anything, but he's like, All right, we're gonna stop this shit right now, and we're gonna talk about it.
1:06:17
SPEAKER_00: Like XYZ, this thought is bullshit because A B C one Two Five, and I'm like, Okay, yeah, yeah.
1:06:24
SPEAKER_00: So, like those those connections with people that I have in my life are super important for reasons like that, because sometimes you do need someone to talk you down, and like I can come off as the most fucking confident, no my shit fucking person as I want.
1:06:37
SPEAKER_00: I'm really good at it.
1:06:39
SPEAKER_00: It was my fucking job for a really long time.
1:06:41
SPEAKER_00: It still is my fucking job, but I am one of the most critical, insecure motherfuckers you will probably ever meet because I never got complimented as a child.
1:06:49
SPEAKER_00: Someone does compliment me.
1:06:51
SPEAKER_00: I don't know how to fucking accept it.
1:06:52
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, same.
1:06:53
SPEAKER_01: My wife is almost exactly like your husband because even just a few weeks ago, she pointed out to me, she goes, you know, all your friends that I've met are like kind of passive aggressively critical.
1:07:06
SPEAKER_01: And that's just because that's how we uh communicate with each other.
1:07:09
SPEAKER_01: That's that's our sense of honesty.
1:07:11
SPEAKER_01: But she can tell that it's kind of had its impact on me, so I'm constantly questioning myself sometimes because I, you know, and I that's not a dismissal and saying that I have shitty friends.
1:07:22
SPEAKER_01: That's just that's just how we conditioned ourselves to communicate with each other, but it does have a negative side effect on occasion, and my wife pointed it out.
1:07:32
SPEAKER_01: So when she offers me a compliment, I feel like she's being disingenuous when she's being sincere.
1:07:39
SPEAKER_00: And no, I hate that.
1:07:41
SPEAKER_00: And it's like right, right.
1:07:42
SPEAKER_01: It's like it's like, oh, she's being sincere, and I I I feel like she's making fun of me.
1:07:47
SPEAKER_00: My brain does this thing where it's like, take the compliment, stupid.
1:07:49
SPEAKER_00: Wait, are they full?
1:07:51
SPEAKER_00: Take the compliment.
1:07:52
SPEAKER_00: No, they're being an asshole.
1:07:53
SPEAKER_00: Take the I don't know!
1:07:54
SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, yes.
1:07:56
SPEAKER_01: I love this conversation.
1:07:57
SPEAKER_01: I think we could go on for hours.
1:07:59
SPEAKER_01: Let's wrap it up and let's uh let's talk about where people can find Meathead Test Kitchen at.
1:08:04
SPEAKER_00: Everywhere, literally, pretty much.
1:08:06
SPEAKER_00: Um, we're at Meathead Test Kitchen on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook.
1:08:11
SPEAKER_00: We have a Twitter account for now.
1:08:13
SPEAKER_00: I don't know how much longer that's gonna roll.
1:08:14
SPEAKER_00: We don't really use it.
1:08:15
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, meatheadtestkitchen.com if you want to check out more.
1:08:20
SPEAKER_00: We uh do personal training, we do nutrition coaching, we have uh workout templates.
1:08:26
SPEAKER_00: So it's like we sell pre-packaged, we do individual plans for clients that sign up for services, but also like we have the quick and dirty.
1:08:33
SPEAKER_00: If you already have some baseline training experience, you could pick up an eight or a 12-week program.
1:08:37
SPEAKER_00: Um, and those are at meatheadathletics.com.
1:08:40
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I'm everywhere at Meathead Sadie, Twitch, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube.
1:08:46
SPEAKER_00: I think those are the big four these days, right?
1:08:48
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
1:08:48
SPEAKER_00: I would I've been in it since MySpace was a thing.
1:08:50
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, I miss MySpace.
1:08:52
SPEAKER_01: I think I'm the only person on earth that will say that I miss MySpace.
1:08:55
SPEAKER_00: You know what I miss the most about MySpace?
1:08:57
SPEAKER_00: I miss my curated MySpace fucking playlist.
1:09:00
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
1:09:03
SPEAKER_01: In discovering new bands, I don't feel like there's ever been a vessel that's popped up for new discovery like like MySpace was.
1:09:12
SPEAKER_00: YouTube was good, but like MySpace.
1:09:15
SPEAKER_00: Like, oh my god, my fucking husband and I, some of our first messages to each other were on MySpace.
1:09:21
SPEAKER_01: That's amazing.
1:09:23
SPEAKER_01: That is dope.
1:09:24
SPEAKER_00: Weird.
1:09:25
SPEAKER_01: What's the next big thing that you are able to talk about coming up with Meathead Test Kitchen?
1:09:30
SPEAKER_00: Um, we are gonna be releasing a cookbook when Sasha has a couple minutes to finish some of the detail stuff.
1:09:35
SPEAKER_00: She just got um a huge announcement that we can't talk about yet either.
1:09:39
SPEAKER_01: But um that's kind of what I'm teeing you up for.
1:09:42
SPEAKER_01: Was hoping that you could drop a hint on that, but I think that's a good carrot to get people to check out Meathead Test Kitchen.
1:09:50
SPEAKER_01: Check out my friend Sadie Gray.
1:09:52
SPEAKER_01: Dude, it is awesome that we got to connect and have this fun conversation.
1:09:57
SPEAKER_01: I'm glad we got yes, yes, and I hope we can maybe collaborate more in the future.
1:10:02
SPEAKER_00: I think we're set up for it.
1:10:04
SPEAKER_00: I think we're, you know, like I've got a room, you've got a room, we've got the stuff, so I think we're good.
1:10:08
SPEAKER_01: Good, good, good.
1:10:09
SPEAKER_01: Well, uh, thanks for doing the show.
1:10:11
SPEAKER_01: The world is a much better place with you and it, my friend.
1:10:15
SPEAKER_00: I try, I really fucking do.
1:10:18
SPEAKER_00: I really do.
1:10:19
SPEAKER_00: Some days not so much, but most days I fucking try.
1:10:22
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
1:10:22
SPEAKER_00: I really appreciate that.
1:10:24
SPEAKER_01: Once again, I want to thank Sadie for being a part of the show today.
1:10:27
SPEAKER_01: Make sure you check out Meathead Test Kitchen on all podcasting platforms and on YouTube.
1:10:35
SPEAKER_01: Check Sadie out at MeatheadSadie on Instagram.
1:10:40
SPEAKER_01: Check out all of their content.
1:10:42
SPEAKER_01: They have a lot to offer.
1:10:45
SPEAKER_01: Make sure you're giving me a follow on all platforms, including YouTube, TikTok, Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.
1:10:53
SPEAKER_01: And make sure you also check out my website, www.caughton the mic dot com.
1:11:00
SPEAKER_01: A lot of great info there.
1:11:02
SPEAKER_01: This has been Caught on the Mike with Michael Clark.
1:11:05
SPEAKER_01: I'm Michael Clark.
1:11:06
SPEAKER_01: Until next time, thank you.