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Whackhead Prank: Senseless survey – big internet vs little internet · Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: So here we go, Here we go.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Here is another senseless survey from Darren Wackhead Simpson on
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: KFM Mornings KF Mornings.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: Okay, so senseless survey. Throw your numbers at me. How
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: many questions will I ask this morning? Pointless? Well, no,
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: not pointless? Sense? Are they very important questions? Question? It's
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: another show? Eleven questions, eleven questions or.
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  Speaker 3: He didn't sound too enthusiastic with that answer, Darren nine questions.
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: Nine questions. I'm not revealing anything, yeah, twelve questions, twelve questions, Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: producer bread fourteen fourteen questions. Okay, listen, We've got a
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: prize here that I'm actually very jealous about. Yes, very jealous.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: One of the prizes that we've added to the Will
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: of Joy that you can win you this morning is
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  Speaker 1: that comes to you courtesy of KFM.
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  Speaker 3: The Music Department has generously donated a prize to the.
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  Speaker 1: Will of Joy. Yes, it is a Bruno Mars the
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: romantic vinyl album. Yes, great on its own. I'm very
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: happy with that. More actual music. This is a record
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: as well as a tote bag and a t shirt
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  Speaker 1: and a poster. To this day, I don't know what
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  Speaker 1: a tote bag is What is a tote bag? What
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: is a to have so many of the cloth tote.
• 1:44
  Speaker 4: Oh like a like a Woolways bag, well with a
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  Speaker 4: bit more the design flap. Okay, yeah, okay, but that
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  Speaker 4: same sort of ard yes, but no, okay.
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: So I'm it's all no closer to working out what
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: a tote bag is. Clock bag, Yes.
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  Speaker 3: Like a clock bag like if you see people like shopping,
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  Speaker 3: but not like Willis is a version of a tote bag,
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  Speaker 3: but this one, I guess a bit more stylish.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, yes, still left. Okay, but it doesn't. I'll go
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: have a look. I'll do a bit of reconnaisance for myself.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: We got ticket.
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  Speaker 3: This feels like very old school, you know, like radio price.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: What a lovely prize. You want to go analog? Now
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: we're going real analog. The problem is do you have
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: a record play? I do? I do? Who's chilling? You
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  Speaker 1: don't have a record? Is it one still in your
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  Speaker 1: parents place?
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  Speaker 3: A record player?
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  Speaker 1: No?
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  Speaker 4: No?
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  Speaker 1: Sometimes you've see in there, but they don't work.
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  Speaker 3: I'm so fake. I have records, but no record player. Okay,
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  Speaker 3: we're just collecting out here. I don't know what the
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  Speaker 3: end goal is. It record, I can get them next,
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  Speaker 3: we could we could figure it out later.
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  Speaker 1: I know Brad's got a sizeable collection of vinyls. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: what's your favorite? There? Favorite vinyl? Crazy question, that's impossible.
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  Speaker 1: I don't know. No, I none, I have none. But
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  Speaker 1: also could give you a reason to go and buy
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  Speaker 1: one if you win, you know where you're gonna buy
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  Speaker 1: one these days? If you do, you go to about
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: a good one marketplace. Okay, anyway, anyways, let's move along
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  Speaker 1: to the senseless survey. Okay, random questions looking for legit answers?
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: Do I get them?
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  Speaker 3: Do I?
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  Speaker 1: Ever? He's your senseless survey phoning from the Census Bureau. Okay,
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: So I'm just gonna ask you a couple of questions
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  Speaker 1: if you could just answer them as best as possible. Okay,
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Have you ever kissed yourself in the mirror? No? When
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: it comes to underwear, do you prefer style or comfort?
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  Speaker 1: Comfort is being a millennial knowing that some tasks require
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  Speaker 1: a big Internet and some other tasks require the little Internet.
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  Speaker 1: Like you don't book a flight on a phone, only
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  Speaker 1: on a laptop. Yeah, ma'am, Is it true that if
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: your garden naked, it's the only way to get your
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: neighbor to build a wall at no cost to you. No,
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: would you describe your day as tedious, dull or boring? Tedious?
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  Speaker 1: When you alone and you sneeze, do you ever bless yourself?
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  Speaker 5: Yeah?
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  Speaker 1: How many times a day would you say?
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  Speaker 4: You do this?
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: Usually when I sneeze, I do this. Give me an example.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: Do you think a glass sliding door should have a peephole?
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  Speaker 3: No, of course we can see through through.
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  Speaker 1: That love, ma'am of vapes subconsciously training people to pleasure
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  Speaker 1: robots in the future. You're sick.
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  Speaker 2: I was wondering about that put down question today. Don't
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  Speaker 2: bring your sick internet things.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, don't bring your nasty algorithm here.
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  Speaker 1: This is a society, as a.
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  Speaker 3: Community.
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  Speaker 1: I'm still on the analogue cigarettes, and you guys that
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  Speaker 1: have moved to digital is coming for you the robots.
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  Speaker 1: It's all big. It's all a bigger plan. It's all
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: a bigger plan.
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  Speaker 3: You like that water, then flavor, don't you?
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: You don't well making coffee flavor? We have decorum?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, do we do? We?
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  Speaker 1: Really? We are decent people.
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  Speaker 2: We need a list of all of those put down questions,
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  Speaker 2: A compilation of all of the put down.
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  Speaker 1: Questions you need to be jailed.
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  Speaker 2: I think that's one my top Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Wow, you know I always go hard on the on
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  Speaker 1: the put down questions.
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  Speaker 3: Africans they want to chat, you.
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  Speaker 1: Know, guys. All I'm saying is is that see things
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  Speaker 1: well ahead of time.
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  Speaker 3: I feel so sorry for that lady.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a logical connect. I will give you that,
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  Speaker 1: thank you very much. But but just just back to
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  Speaker 1: back to the big Internet and little Internet, is it?
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  Speaker 1: It's true? Is the certain things. There's big Internet, laptop Internet,
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  Speaker 1: and there's little Internet, which is self? Are you like
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  Speaker 1: a sucker path? If you booking a holiday on your phone? Crazy?
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  Speaker 1: That just doesn't feel like that's a risk worth taking.
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  Speaker 1: Same as you don't put WhatsApp on your laptop. You
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: don't WhatsApp somebody from a computer. Hold on, a lot
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  Speaker 1: of people do that.
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  Speaker 3: There's a time place.
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  Speaker 1: You don't have a regular job. No, that's a little internet.
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  Speaker 3: People with with regular jobs on the WhatsApp on the computer,
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  Speaker 3: WhatsApp web.
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  Speaker 1: No, say it's for work, sure, but if it's just
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  Speaker 1: a friend on big Internet, no, it's very impersonal little Internet.
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  Speaker 4: I think online shopping is a big Internet laptop things
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  Speaker 4: for me.
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  Speaker 1: If I don't like if it involves a credit card transaction.
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  Speaker 1: For me, it's it's big Internet. It's computer all day long.
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  Speaker 4: That makes sense, so all day concert tickets fly, same
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  Speaker 4: as like your assommodation psychopath, are you doing okay?
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  Speaker 1: Maybe that's a bit too hot for me. I think
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  Speaker 1: like social media's little Internet. It's not big Internet, okay.
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  Speaker 1: Like like a computer is for work, it's not for fun.
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  Speaker 1: It's for emails, it's for spreadsheets. Don't go and put
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  Speaker 1: your Instagram on me.
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  Speaker 2: You knew there were so many rous.
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  Speaker 1: Big Internet. Don't go like watching yourtos.
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  Speaker 4: There there's a computer, big stream.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: What's wrong with you? You know what I'm saying. That's
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: my theory for the day. Baby boy, you're on KFA Mornings.
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: Just got a couple of messages here dis played before, Guys.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: I work at a private higher Tershire.
• 9:10
  Speaker 5: Institution and students actually attend the examination.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: From their phone, Darren.
• 9:18
  Speaker 5: If you haven't office job, and if you're WhatsApp on
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  Speaker 5: your desktop, it actually saves you a love a lot
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  Speaker 5: of time because then you don't have to flip between
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  Speaker 5: your phone and the screen.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: But it's not right.
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  Speaker 3: You see people with nine to five's office jobs telling
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: you what's up?
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  Speaker 1: Okay, um, question, why is it that you've got a
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  Speaker 1: Bruno Mars record to give away? Okay, why did you
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  Speaker 1: pick Bruno Mars? Well, we didn't. These things are so
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  Speaker 1: rare when they're coming on record. The last time I
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  Speaker 1: got a brand new record was a Taylor Swift that
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  Speaker 1: came in. They don't make them for everything. It's it's
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  Speaker 1: like a unicorn.
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  Speaker 3: I got a degre one from did and I think
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  Speaker 3: it was because no one else wanted to. It's rude,
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  Speaker 3: because I mean, come on, it's David, premier DJ in
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  Speaker 3: the world.
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  Speaker 1: Yes, it's amazing. These things are like a thousand bucks. Yeah, okay,
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  Speaker 1: Will of Joy, Shane from Claimont, how's it Shane? Good morning, Darren.
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  Speaker 1: Are your brother good very well? Yourself? Awesome? Man? Awesome? Okay, Shane.
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  Speaker 1: How many questions did I ask in the sense of survey? Eight?
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  Speaker 1: Eight questions. That's a great answer, sir. Alright, let's play
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: the championship rowns. You get to determine two things here, Foster,
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  Speaker 1: slow left or right on the wheel of Joy. Let's
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: go left and fast, left and fast. Tell me do
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  Speaker 1: you have a record player? I don't what my dad does,
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  Speaker 1: but he's not going to really enjoy Brina Mars, I
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  Speaker 1: don't think you might really. Okay, well let's see what
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  Speaker 1: it lands on. It could be anything. What have we
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  Speaker 1: got here? Oh okay, well it's just coming to me now.
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  Speaker 1: Oh look at this, Look at this. You've got a
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  Speaker 1: little holiday, Shane.
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  Speaker 3: Very nice.
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  Speaker 1: You've got a two nights day for four at Curiosity
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  Speaker 1: in green Point, plus.
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  Speaker 3: Bike rental and a Curiosity Tours experience, all to the
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  Speaker 3: value of six thousand d This is a fantastic price.
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  Speaker 3: What a great start to Monday.
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  Speaker 2: When was when was your last holiday?
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  Speaker 1: Get away? Much but working?
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  Speaker 3: So you deserve and do you have do you have
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  Speaker 3: people to to take who's making it into the fall?
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  Speaker 3: I have a choice of people.
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  Speaker 1: I must fight for it. Okay, well, well listen, you
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  Speaker 1: just got to go just from clear On to greenboyt
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: just just around the mountain and there you go. You're
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  Speaker 1: on holiday, a little staycation. Oh it's amazing, Thank you guys.
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  Speaker 1: That's so cool on a Monday morning pleasure and it
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  Speaker 1: is lucky when you just want to come into the
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  Speaker 1: city and have dinner and maybe catch a show somewhere
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  Speaker 1: and then go to a hotel and you don't have
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  Speaker 1: to go all the way home. Yeah really all right, Shane,
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  Speaker 1: thank you, thanks for listening, thanks for calling. Well done,
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  Speaker 1: enjoy your prize. Whoever you pick to go with you,
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: thank you so much. Thanks guys, pleasure Shane Jeers, thank
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  Speaker 1: you very much to Curiosity. As always we give you
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  Speaker 1: an advert and that means that now there is a
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: vacancy on the wheel of joy. If you're a small
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: business you want to give a prize, you're welcome to
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  Speaker 1: Just email LUs Mornings at KFM dot co dot z.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: The hero today is Curiosity.