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The Power of Changing Our Beliefs with Shelly Lefkoe · The Trauma Therapist

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  Speaker 1: Trauma Theverist podcast. Plus listeners can listen to episodes early
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  Speaker 1: and ad free right now. Become a Plus listener by
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  Speaker 1: going to Apple Podcasts searching for the Trauma Theverist podcast
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  Speaker 1: and signing up today. Welcome to the Trauma Nevers Podcast,
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  Speaker 1: a show about the incredible people dedicated to helping those
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  Speaker 1: who experienced trauma. My name is Got macpherson, and my
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  Speaker 1: mission is to raise awareness of trauma and to inspire
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  Speaker 1: each of us to help those around us. Shelly, you
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  Speaker 1: ready me?
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  Speaker 2: All right?
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  Speaker 1: So five four, three, two and one, our folks, welcome
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  Speaker 1: back to the podcast. Very excited to have us Mike
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  Speaker 1: us today. Shelley Lefco.
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  Speaker 3: Shelley, welcome, Hi, thanks for having me and so I
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  Speaker 3: think everybody should go and give you a five star review.
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  Speaker 3: Love the best podcast.
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  Speaker 1: I appreciate that so much. Shelley is from being my
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  Speaker 1: favorite person in the whole wide world right now. She's
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  Speaker 1: the founder of the left Co Institute, the transformational personal
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  Speaker 1: growth organization that has helped over one hundred and fifty
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  Speaker 1: thousand people worldwide eliminate the living beliefs that hold them
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  Speaker 1: back in life, love, and business. She's the best selling
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  Speaker 1: author of the book Hitting the Wall Eliminate the beliefs
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  Speaker 1: that sabotage your business and your life. She's also an
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  Speaker 1: internationally recognized speaker and workshop leader. For thirty five years,
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  Speaker 1: she's worked with individuals struggling with deep seated behaviors and
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  Speaker 1: emotional challenges, from procrastination to fear of public speaking to
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  Speaker 1: relationship conflicts. Shelley, Welcome to the podcast. Before we get going,
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  Speaker 1: share with the listeners where you're from originally and where
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  Speaker 1: you are currently well.
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  Speaker 3: As people know the minute I open my mouth and
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  Speaker 3: from New York, but I live in northern California.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, this topic is really really interesting to me because
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  Speaker 1: I have a lot of limiting beliefs, but we're not
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  Speaker 1: going to talk about me. Maybe we'll get well, maybe
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  Speaker 1: maybe we'll get there, but I just want to set
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  Speaker 1: the stage. I mean, I love this, and so how
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  Speaker 1: did you start in this?
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  Speaker 2: Yeah?
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  Speaker 3: And I'm really excited because I think we're going to
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  Speaker 3: have a very provocative discussion, which I love so really quickly.
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  Speaker 3: My late husband was on a spiritual intellectual journey to
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  Speaker 3: discover why people know what to do and don't do it,
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  Speaker 3: and don't know what to do and do it. Anyway,
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  Speaker 3: So we all were smart. We know if we eat
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  Speaker 3: well and exercise will feel better, we'll probably live longer.
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  Speaker 3: And we don't do it. We go into relationships going
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  Speaker 3: in that we know we shouldn't be in, and then
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  Speaker 3: we go in and stay in. So he was looking
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  Speaker 3: at why is that? And he was on a plane
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  Speaker 3: going to California thirty five years ago when no one
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  Speaker 3: knew what beliefs were people. When I said I help
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  Speaker 3: people eliminate beliefs, they'd say, you mean like religious beliefs.
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  Speaker 3: And he kind of downloaded this process and he got
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  Speaker 3: off the plane and he realized that it is our
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  Speaker 3: beliefs about ourselves in life, most of which are unconscious,
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  Speaker 3: that totally determine our behavior, emotions, and reality. And so
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  Speaker 3: he came back. He did the process with someone and
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  Speaker 3: I watched him do it, and guy, it was as
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  Speaker 3: if spirit knocked me off my chair and I just went, oh,
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  Speaker 3: my god, this is why I'm on the planet. I'm
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  Speaker 3: like this loud screaming boy said this is why you're here.
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  Speaker 1: Wait, hold on, so you were You were not married
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  Speaker 1: to him at the time.
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  Speaker 3: Yes, I was.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, And you watched him do this in a workshop setting.
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  Speaker 3: Or something, you know. We had a friend over. He said,
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  Speaker 3: I'm going to show you what I created. And he
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  Speaker 3: said to her, what's something you want to change in
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  Speaker 3: your life? And she said, I really want to meet
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  Speaker 3: a guy, I want to get married again, and it's
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  Speaker 3: just not happening. And he said, well, what do you believe?
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  Speaker 3: And she said, well, marriage is suffocating and you have
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  Speaker 3: to give up your independence, and men are selfish, and
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  Speaker 3: you know, started spouting these beliefs and he picked one
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  Speaker 3: belief and he took her through the process and it
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  Speaker 3: was totally eliminated permanently. And I just was blown away.
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  Speaker 3: And I'm blown away every day of my life for
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  Speaker 3: thirty five years. How powerful this is?
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  Speaker 1: So?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah?
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  Speaker 1: All right, So the question is here, why did this
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  Speaker 1: just excite you so much?
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  Speaker 3: My passion, like yours, is to help people be free
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  Speaker 3: of trauma, as is mine. My passion is to help
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  Speaker 3: people live as the unlimited possibility that they are. So
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  Speaker 3: I just got off with this woman who has clutter,
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  Speaker 3: you know, and she just got rid of all these
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  Speaker 3: beliefs about make mistakes and failures are bad and what
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  Speaker 3: if I give away something and I give it, you know,
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  Speaker 3: to the wrong place or get I give away something
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  Speaker 3: I need and she's so terrified. And it's funny because
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  Speaker 3: she also has a pattern of procrastination, and the beliefs
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  Speaker 3: were the exact same thing. She was so terrified of
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  Speaker 3: making a mistake or failing, and the beliefs are mistakes
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  Speaker 3: and failures are bad. And if I make a mistake
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  Speaker 3: or fail, I'll be rejected. And one of the most
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  Speaker 3: thrilling things for me is that when these beliefs go
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  Speaker 3: away people you can see the change and know that
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  Speaker 3: the possibilities that they have. It's like it's like getting
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  Speaker 3: rid of boxes that you're stuck in, because that's what
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  Speaker 3: beliefs are. And particularly, my favorite population in the whole
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  Speaker 3: world to work with is sexual abuse survivors because my
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  Speaker 3: late husband used to say, and this is where we're
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  Speaker 3: going to get a little provocative. Nothing that happens to
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  Speaker 3: you has any impact on your life whatsoever. What has
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  Speaker 3: an impact is what you conclude about it. So if
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  Speaker 3: you walk away from if you were you know, I'm
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  Speaker 3: sexually abused, and you walked away going, oh my god,
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  Speaker 3: that was awful. I hope that never happens again, you know,
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  Speaker 3: and then you go and live your life. You're not
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  Speaker 3: going to be traumatized. The trauma comes from I'm damaged goods,
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  Speaker 3: I'm worthless, I'm powerless. Men are you know, dangerous? I
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  Speaker 3: can't protect myself. Those are the beliefs that cause all
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  Speaker 3: the problems in our lives. And I worked with a man,
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  Speaker 3: this is my favorite story, who was a psychiatrist and
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  Speaker 3: he had never had a successful relationship. And he had
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  Speaker 3: a mom who incested him, locked him and beat him,
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  Speaker 3: locked him in a closet every day was and she
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  Speaker 3: went to church. And this man was as traumatized and
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  Speaker 3: been through enough therapy and everything else. And I worked
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  Speaker 3: with him, and it was a long time ago, and
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  Speaker 3: I worked with him for six months, which that's a
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  Speaker 3: long time, and he got rid of all his beliefs.
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  Speaker 3: He met a woman, had an incredibly beautiful wedding. I
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  Speaker 3: was invited, And I have millions of stories like that,
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  Speaker 3: but he was the most extreme case, you know, where
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  Speaker 3: you talk about trauma, you know it was but all
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  Speaker 3: of the beliefs that he got rid of, and the
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  Speaker 3: emotional conditioning that we also work with, it doesn't have
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  Speaker 3: to be hard. It isn't hard to get rid of
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  Speaker 3: the trauma.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, So Look, the question here is I mean, it's obvious,
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  Speaker 1: how the hell do you do it? Because hold on,
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  Speaker 1: don't answer because from what you're saying, it sounds too easy.
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  Speaker 1: Come on, Shelley, who are you kidding?
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  Speaker 3: Yep?
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  Speaker 1: Who are you kidding?
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  Speaker 2: Yep?
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  Speaker 3: Yep.
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  Speaker 2: I know.
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  Speaker 3: So there's two things we do and in thirty minutes,
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  Speaker 3: I wish I could take you all through the process
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  Speaker 3: I've actually done with our long process, our long podcast asks.
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  Speaker 3: I sometimes will take people through the process, but I
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  Speaker 3: don't have time on this one. But I will explain.
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  Speaker 3: And of course when you explain something, it's not as
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  Speaker 3: powerful as doing it. Okay, So let's assume somebody has
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  Speaker 3: the belief I'm worthless right. Whatever happened to you in
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  Speaker 3: your childhood you walked away with I'm worthless right. So
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  Speaker 3: we have a lot of you know, a bunch of steps,
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  Speaker 3: and then we break up the belief in different ways.
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  Speaker 3: But here's the thing. We think we saw our beliefs
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  Speaker 3: in the world, and I'll explain. And it is impossible
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  Speaker 3: to not believe something you think you saw. So get
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  Speaker 3: to the place in the process where I'll say, doesn't
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  Speaker 3: it seem like as a child you saw I'm worthless,
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  Speaker 3: and they say I did, or I'm damaged goods or
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  Speaker 3: I'm not good enough you know, or whatever it is.
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  Speaker 3: And I say, anything you could see, and if you're listening,
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  Speaker 3: I'm holding up my pink water bottle. Anything you can
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  Speaker 3: see has a color, shape and location. You cannot see,
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  Speaker 3: I'm worthless. You can see your father saying you're worthless.
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  Speaker 3: You could see them abandon you or incest you, or
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  Speaker 3: hit you or criticize you. So we see our parents' behavior,
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  Speaker 3: or we see someone do something to us that we
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  Speaker 3: didn't want them to do. That is seeable. But I'm worthless,
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  Speaker 3: I'm powerless. That is in your mind. You made that up.
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  Speaker 3: And it is like Santa Claus. Guy, when you're little,
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  Speaker 3: you go, there's Santa Claus. What do you mean there's
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  Speaker 3: no Santa Claus. Of course there's a Santa Claus. I
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  Speaker 3: saw a Santa Claus. And one day, when you're eight
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  Speaker 3: years old, you go, I never saw Santa Claus. I
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  Speaker 3: saw my father. And I'll never forget. When Christmas, my
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  Speaker 3: niece's daughter was sitting on her lap. I'm sorry, my
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  Speaker 3: cousin's daughter was sitting on her lap and we were
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  Speaker 3: in Florida, and all the kids were dialed in except her.
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  Speaker 3: She was the last of the kids, and she would
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  Speaker 3: always cry when Sanna came in. And all of a sudden,
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  Speaker 3: her father, my cousin's husband, walks in and she goes,
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  Speaker 3: daddy boom. The belief in Santa Claus was gone. She said,
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  Speaker 3: I never saw Santa Claus. That was my dad all
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  Speaker 3: the time, all along. So our beliefs disappear when we
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  Speaker 3: get that we never saw them in the world. Now
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  Speaker 3: you have to do that in a context, you know,
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  Speaker 3: of a session, and I get them there in different ways,
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  Speaker 3: and then we discuss the feeling, okay, the feeling of worthlessness.
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  Speaker 3: Now out, I'm going to make an assertion and then
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  Speaker 3: I'll explain it. Okay, all of our feelings and emotions
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  Speaker 3: come from the meaning we gives meaningless events meaning. So
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  Speaker 3: everybody listening, stop and think for a second. If somebody
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  Speaker 3: comes into a room and doesn't speak to you, what
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  Speaker 3: might you automatically think.
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  Speaker 1: This, give me something, guy, that I'm not interesting enough
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  Speaker 1: for you to come over and say, hey, what's up.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, and some of you said that rude, they're distracted.
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  Speaker 3: They didn't seem whatever you came up with that's meaning?
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  Speaker 3: Where did that meaning? I'm not interesting enough? Where did
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  Speaker 3: that meaning come from?
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  Speaker 1: Are you asking me to answer that? Oh? Yeah, where
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  Speaker 1: did that come from? Probably? Past experiences?
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  Speaker 3: No, because five people could have the exact same past
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  Speaker 3: experience and come up with five different meanings.
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  Speaker 1: So where did that come from?
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  Speaker 3: Well, for me, no, where does meaning come from? Oh?
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  Speaker 1: Where does meaning come from? What we attribute our meaning
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  Speaker 1: to from? Don't we attribute meaning from our previous experiences?
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  Speaker 1: Where do we attribute? Where do we get our meaning from?
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  Speaker 3: Exactly?
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  Speaker 1: Your brain? Okay?
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  Speaker 3: Meaning comes from your brain, your mind always, Yeah, Okay,
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  Speaker 3: they don't like me. It's not going to turn out.
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  Speaker 3: I'm you know, I'm going to get fired. She's going
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  Speaker 3: to hurt me. You know, meaning is in your mind. Okay,
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  Speaker 3: if meaning is in your mind, in your head, do
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  Speaker 3: events have inherent meaning? No? No, And another way of
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  Speaker 3: saying that is I don't know any anything for sure.
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  Speaker 3: Because something happened. So my husband died, talk about traumatic.
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  Speaker 3: That was very it was horrible, But it doesn't mean
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  Speaker 3: I'll never be happy again. Or so I said, Oh
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  Speaker 3: my god, I'm going to starve to death. I don't
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  Speaker 3: know how to run a business. And then I use
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  Speaker 3: this little technique that I'm going to tell you in
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  Speaker 3: a second. Well, it could mean that, and it could
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  Speaker 3: mean I'm going to step up and I'm going to learn.
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  Speaker 3: But the fact that he died doesn't mean anything. It
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  Speaker 3: doesn't not that it doesn't matter, it doesn't.
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  Speaker 1: We ascribe meanings to events, so we.
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  Speaker 3: Either do what we don't. We have a course where
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  Speaker 3: we teach people to not do that. When my husband
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  Speaker 3: was diagnosed with fourth stage calling cancer, he didn't give
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  Speaker 3: it meaning I mean truly, but he was a master.
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  Speaker 3: I mean, we led the course twenty eight times. So
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  Speaker 3: we're very good at not assigning meaning or dissolving meaning
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  Speaker 3: because we assign meaning very fast. But events have no
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  Speaker 3: inherent meaning. So when I work with trauma victims, people
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  Speaker 3: who've really had serious trauma, after they get rid of
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  Speaker 3: the beliefs, I'll say to them, what happened to you
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  Speaker 3: was horrible. I'm not minimizing it. I had a client
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  Speaker 3: who was incested by a father from the time she
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  Speaker 3: was three to the time she was twelve. That's not fun,
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  Speaker 3: that's really not But what meaning does it have When
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  Speaker 3: she said nothing, it has no meaning. She no longer
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  Speaker 3: defined herself by something that happened to her when she
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  Speaker 3: was a kid. It's not who she is. You don't
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  Speaker 3: have to define yourself.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, let me pause here for a second. Is it
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  Speaker 1: fair to say that we choose to ascribe meaning to things. No,
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  Speaker 1: it's not. We don't.
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  Speaker 3: No, you don't choose. Nobody will choose to just to describe,
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  Speaker 3: to ascribe. I'm worthless. So let me meaning the meaning.
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  Speaker 3: So beliefs are formed in the past. Meaning is formed
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  Speaker 3: in the moment. The meaning we give events come generally
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  Speaker 3: not always comes from our beliefs.
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  Speaker 1: Okay.
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  Speaker 3: So if you believe it dogs are dangerous and a
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  Speaker 3: dog comes into the room, you're going to give it
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  Speaker 3: the meaning it's going to bite me, and then you're
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  Speaker 3: going to feel fear.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, So we're ascribing meaning based on our beliefs. Yes,
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  Speaker 1: so it's happening subconsciously, right, we're ascribing meaning in a second.
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  Speaker 3: Yes, but you're not choosing. You don't have a choice.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, okay, Yeah, but you're also saying that we can
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  Speaker 1: choose to eliminate those meanings.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah. So once you eliminate the beliefs, then you stop.
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  Speaker 3: If you get rid of that one of the most
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  Speaker 3: common beliefs is I'm not important. If you get rid
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  Speaker 3: of the belief I'm not important and somebody ignores you,
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  Speaker 3: you won't give it the meaning I'm that important, and
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  Speaker 3: therefore you won't get angry, and you'll just say, you know,
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  Speaker 3: I don't appreciate being ignored. You know, I'd appreciate if
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  Speaker 3: you would give me your attention. But this when the
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  Speaker 3: meaning goes away, the feeling goes away.
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  Speaker 1: What I mean, I'm just thinking, our beliefs are built
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  Speaker 1: on all this foundation, right, they come from all these
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  Speaker 1: different areas, from our culture, from our parents, our belief well, right,
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  Speaker 1: I mean absolutely, yeah, absolutely yeah, And I'm just thinking,
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  Speaker 1: why is this? Is this difficult? It's difficult for us.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, I'm thinking that this is challenging for us
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  Speaker 1: because we don't break it down like this.
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  Speaker 3: Here's the thing A lot of us don't, right, But
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  Speaker 3: here's the thing. We come into this world, guy and
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  Speaker 3: everyone listening, we don't know if we're good enough, we're
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  Speaker 3: not good enough. We don't know if we're important or
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  Speaker 3: not important. We don't know if money flows to us
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  Speaker 3: with abundance or it's scarce and hard to get. Now,
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  Speaker 3: for anybody who has children listening and you know, and
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  Speaker 3: I've asked. I have clients in every country around the world,
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  Speaker 3: Saudi Arabia, and I asked them when your kids come,
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  Speaker 3: when you come home, what do your kids do? And
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  Speaker 3: they say they run to me. I say, what do
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  Speaker 3: they want? Three things every country around the world affection, attention,
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  Speaker 3: and acknowledgment. And then I ask, what is the one
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  Speaker 3: word question every child asks all day long, and every
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  Speaker 3: single solitary person answers. People without kids answer why. So
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  Speaker 3: if you're being criticized, you kids say why, Well, I
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  Speaker 3: guess I'm not good enough, I'm ignored. My parents are
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  Speaker 3: looking at their iPhones while they're talking to me. I
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  Speaker 3: guess I'm not important. I get sexually abused. Why, I
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  Speaker 3: guess men can be trusted, or women can't be trusted,
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  Speaker 3: or men are dangerous. Why is this happening to me?
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  Speaker 3: I guess it's my fault. Very common belief must be
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  Speaker 3: my fault. So we ask why why are my parents
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  Speaker 3: struggling with money? Well, I guess money is scarce and
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  Speaker 3: hard to get. And you say, cultural beliefs. I have
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  Speaker 3: clients in every religion in the Middle East, and all
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  Speaker 3: of the cultural beliefs are very powerful. I just worked
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  Speaker 3: with a woman who helps Muslim women be empowered. She
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  Speaker 3: wants empower Muslim women. She was raised in Pakistan. She
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  Speaker 3: teaches this stuff, and she still had the belief women
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  Speaker 3: are inferior to men and women can never make as
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  Speaker 3: much money as men because she saw that, she thinks
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  Speaker 3: growing up, but she never saw that. She just saw
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  Speaker 3: in her culture women were treated a certain way.
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  Speaker 1: She made an interpretation exactly right, exactly, And that's how
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  Speaker 1: our beliefs get formed. Wow. And the process of what
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  Speaker 1: breaking these beliefs down, these negative or her full or
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  Speaker 1: limiting beliefs. Yes, the process of breaking them down is
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  Speaker 1: in and of itself a very powerful process that a
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  Speaker 1: lot of us don't do. We don't do it. We
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  Speaker 1: feel like we're and I'm speaking about myself. We feel
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  Speaker 1: like this is it.
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  Speaker 3: It's the truth. That's what a belief is. A belief
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  Speaker 3: is a statement about and by the way, I'm going
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  Speaker 3: to give you all an opportunity to eliminate a belief
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  Speaker 3: for free. But a belief is a statement about reality
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  Speaker 3: that you hold as the truth. So if something is true,
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  Speaker 3: then there's no conversation, it's just true.
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  Speaker 1: Let me just pause here, remind everyone. I'm speaking with
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  Speaker 1: Shelley Lefko. Her book is titled Hitting the Wall, Eliminate
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  Speaker 1: the beliefs and Sabotage your business and your life. All right,
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  Speaker 1: So let's kind of shift here. So who do you
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: work with in what capacity? Do you work with people
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  Speaker 1: aside from the book? Do you have courses you work
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  Speaker 1: with people just one on one or what?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah? No, we have. So we have a few things.
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  Speaker 3: So what I'm what I'm going to actually offer is wait,
• 23:49
  Speaker 3: hold on, I just lost you.
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  Speaker 1: There. We a.
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  Speaker 3: What I'm going to offer is opportunity to eliminate a
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  Speaker 3: belief for free. So we do private, you know, one
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  Speaker 3: on one sessions. We have courses where we teach therapists,
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  Speaker 3: counselors and people who want to learn how to do
• 24:14
  Speaker 3: this work. We train them and we have a course
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  Speaker 3: called the Occurring Course, which teaches you how to dissolve.
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  Speaker 3: Meaning it's a ten week course and at the end
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  Speaker 3: you come out like a guru.
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  Speaker 1: I want to come out like a guru. Okay, So
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  Speaker 1: that's at Umrityleftgo dot com. Yeah is that correct? Okay?
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  Speaker 1: That's m O R T y l E f k
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  Speaker 1: o E dot com.
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  Speaker 3: Dot com.
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  Speaker 1: Leftgo institute dot com. Okay, and is it the book? Talk?
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  Speaker 1: Give me a little bit about the book.
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  Speaker 3: Well, the book is really geared for entrepreneurs. Somebody heard
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: me speak and he said, we have to write a book. Now,
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  Speaker 3: I understand why people don't do it. People. That's what
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  Speaker 3: my husband, my late husband realized, is that we all
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  Speaker 3: go to workshops and seminars and our lawyers and people
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  Speaker 3: tell us what to do, and we go, oh my god,
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  Speaker 3: that was so good, that was brilliant, and then we
• 25:23
  Speaker 3: go home three days later, the notes are in the
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  Speaker 3: drawer and nothing changes. And it's because you can't make
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  Speaker 3: It's very hard. Sorry, it's very difficult to make change
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  Speaker 3: in your life without eliminating the beliefs. Because you could
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  Speaker 3: go and your boss can say to you, if you
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: don't start making mistakes and failing, I'm going to fire you.
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  Speaker 3: You've got to take risks, you got to take chances.
• 25:49
  Speaker 3: And if you believe mistakes and failures are bad, or
• 25:52
  Speaker 3: if I make a mistake or fail, I'll be rejected.
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  Speaker 3: You're not going to do it. So this is the
• 25:59
  Speaker 3: key to unlocking everything. And I talk about watering all
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: the plants. You know, there are people who water. You know, workoholism.
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  Speaker 3: You know, what makes me good enough is achieving things.
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  Speaker 3: So if you have that belief, you're going to be
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  Speaker 3: working all the time because every time you're not achieving, something,
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  Speaker 3: I'm not good enough comes up in your face. Right.
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  Speaker 3: So those are called survival strategy beliefs. And you know,
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  Speaker 3: if you're somebody again who has suffered trauma, those beliefs,
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  Speaker 3: you better not speak up. It's dangerous to speak up,
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: you know. And so you're sitting in a meeting and
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: you want to speak up, and you know how to
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: speak up. So but if you have the belief speaking
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  Speaker 3: up is dangerous because when you were a kid, you
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  Speaker 3: got beaten. Guess what, You're just not going to do it.
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  Speaker 3: And what what we do is, uh, there's a course
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  Speaker 3: we have which I'm going to if you eliminate the belief.
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  Speaker 3: If you go to if you go to my instagram
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: Shelley at Shelleylefco dot at Shelley Lefco on Instagram and
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  Speaker 3: you put in breakthrough twenty five, I'm going to give
• 27:16
  Speaker 3: you access to eliminate a belief for free. And I'm
• 27:22
  Speaker 3: also going to give you an opportunity for fifteen people
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: who are listening a mindset mastery call with me. So
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  Speaker 3: that's breakthrough twenty five at Shelley Lefco. And we have
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: a product called Natural Confidence, which is nineteen of the
• 27:45
  Speaker 3: most common self esteem beliefs that people have and you
• 27:49
  Speaker 3: can go through in a video. And so we have
• 27:53
  Speaker 3: that as well.
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  Speaker 1: As we kind of wind down here, Why is this
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  Speaker 1: hard for us? Why does it feel hard for us?
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  Speaker 3: Because it is impossible to not believe something you think
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  Speaker 3: you saw.
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  Speaker 4: That's why it's again, it is impossible to not believe
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  Speaker 4: something you think you saw.
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  Speaker 3: So when I work with people, and I work with
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  Speaker 3: you know, CEOs of major companies, you know, I work
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  Speaker 3: with people from every walk of life, and when I
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  Speaker 3: say to them, doesn't it seem like you saw I'm
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  Speaker 3: not good enough? Everybody says, yes, I saw that, right. Well,
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  Speaker 3: if you saw it. You know, if somebody said to you,
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  Speaker 3: Shelley is a blonde, you'd say, no, she's the red head.
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  Speaker 3: And they'd say no, no, she's a blonde, and you'd say, nope,
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  Speaker 3: I just had around my show she's a red head.
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  Speaker 3: And they couldn't convince you. But if I said to you, oh, no, no, no,
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  Speaker 3: this is a wig and I took it off and
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  Speaker 3: you went, oh my god, you are blonde. The belief
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  Speaker 3: that I'm a redhead goes away. And it's the same
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  Speaker 3: thing with the I'm not good enough. You saw your
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  Speaker 3: parents criticize you, or you saw failing in school where
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: you saw you know, being beaten or being raped or
• 29:40
  Speaker 3: whatever happened to you. But the beliefs are made up.
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  Speaker 3: So when people come to me, they come to me
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  Speaker 3: with a pattern. Where are you stuck? What do you
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  Speaker 3: want to change? So we help people make hard to
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  Speaker 3: change behavior change easily. We have thousands My most proudest thing,
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  Speaker 3: not just we have thousands of testimonials in thirty five years. Guy,
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  Speaker 3: there is not a bad word written about us on
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  Speaker 3: the internet, Like this stuff is nonsense, right, because the
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  Speaker 3: beliefs go away, and people always say to me, I
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  Speaker 3: got more in two sessions with you than twenty years
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  Speaker 3: in therapy because it's good. Therapy teaches you how to
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  Speaker 3: cope with life and your problems. We get rid of
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  Speaker 3: your problems, so there's nothing to cope.
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: With, right right, Wow, All right, Shelly, Look, we're gonna
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: have to bring you back. Obviously, you're gonna have to
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: come back here, so much, so much to talk about. Yes,
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  Speaker 1: oh my god, Okay, share with us again. The website.
• 30:53
  Speaker 3: Okay, so the website is leftco. Ellie f is in
• 30:57
  Speaker 3: Frank koe In dot com. But if you go to
• 31:04
  Speaker 3: at Shelley Lefco on Instagram and put in breakthrough twenty five,
• 31:11
  Speaker 3: we'll get access to eliminate a belief for free and
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: you can get a Mestery mindset call with me the
• 31:18
  Speaker 3: first fifteen people.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: Okay, and I just did that, So looking forward to that, Shelley,
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: so exciting. I need a whole private session on this
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: stuff because it's really empowering. Love to have you back,
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: and thank you so much for being here.
• 31:40
  Speaker 3: Thank you, thanks for having me guy.
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: All right, take care Bye.
• 32:00
  Speaker 3: Popular Doma Homon