Latest / Jennifer Rothschild Show / #9: Why the Trinity Matters to Your Relationships with Liz Daye
Transcript
- 0:00I wanted to make sure that I could ground myself in something
- 0:03that was true about God.
- 0:04So when I'm in the hospital and I'm either with a patient or I'm with one of my
- 0:07children or whatever the case is, I'm asking, what is God like here?
- 0:12Because I need to ask that so that I can know what's true.
- 0:16And so that in that moment, I can have comfort that is rooted in truth,
- 0:20that is rooted in something real.
- 0:22And that's what it looks like to promote that kind of discipleship, because that
- 0:27shouldn't be an individual thing, right?
- 0:28We should be doing that in community with each other.
- 0:31When we're going through hard stuff, we need to remind one another
- 0:34the truth about the triune God.
- 0:42Welcome to the Jennifer Rothschild Show.
- 0:44This is where thoughtful people come to grow.
- 0:47I'm so glad you are here today because we're talking about
- 0:51something so good today.
- 0:53Now, here's what it is, okay?
- 0:55In a culture shaped by individualism, chaplain and theologian, our guest today,
- 1:01Liz is going to invite us back to the relational heart of God.
- 1:07Don't we need that? And here's how she's gonna do it.
- 1:10She's gonna unpack the mystery of the Trinity to help us rediscover the beauty
- 1:16of belonging to God's family.
- 1:19Oh, listen, if you've got some theological
- 1:22questions on the Trinity, I just want you to know we've got
- 1:25some really good answers today.
- 1:29So let's grow.
- 1:39Well, hey friends, I'm glad you are back again for another amazing week here
- 1:46at the Jennifer Rothschild Show.
- 1:48And some of you have been leaving reviews and man, can I just tell you
- 1:51how much I appreciate that?
- 1:53You guys are just the kindest, most wonderful people.
- 1:56So thank you for doing that.
- 1:57We're talking today with Liz Day, first time I ever talked to her.
- 2:00And I want to tell you something interesting that you're going to hear.
- 2:03Liz is autistic and she kind of explains that, and I'm just going to I just wanna
- 2:06give you that heads up because it was super helpful to me.
- 2:09And I thought it was really special just to break down some of the mystique.
- 2:14So if that's a thing for you, you're gonna appreciate that today.
- 2:17And you know, I realized too, the last couple of weeks we've touched
- 2:20on the importance of relationships.
- 2:23So I'm gonna tell you that something happened to me because of relationship.
- 2:26All right, ready?
- 2:28Mushroom coffee.
- 2:29Yes.
- 2:30I have a couple of friends who are like, oh my gosh, you will love mushroom coffee.
- 2:34And it's so good for your brain.
- 2:35Now you may already know I am a coffee girl.
- 2:38In fact, I have a steaming cup of Verona that I made with my espresso machine.
- 2:46So even though it's coffee, it's got like this foamy crema on the top.
- 2:49Mm.
- 2:51My, my whole podcast studio smells like it.
- 2:53It makes me very happy.
- 2:55So I thought, my friends know how much I love coffee.
- 2:58So if they think I'm gonna love this mushroom coffee,
- 3:00of course I'm gonna love it. And you may love mushroom coffee.
- 3:02Like it is the thing.
- 3:04It's made with all these mushrooms. I opened the bag.
- 3:07It smelled like coffee.
- 3:09I thought, this is fantastic.
- 3:11And then I brewed it.
- 3:14Okay, can I just say, friends don't let friends drink mushroom coffee.
- 3:18I know, I know, you may be out there going,
- 3:20but you haven't tried such and such.
- 3:22And you're right, I probably haven't.
- 3:23It might just be the brand that I tried, which I will not name.
- 3:27But I just realized I've got 2 bags of mushroom coffee here and my
- 3:31brain needs the mushrooms. So here's what I'm doing.
- 3:33I'm trying to put a little scoop of mushroom coffee in my good
- 3:37coffee so that it doesn't ruin my good coffee, but that my brain
- 3:40gets a little mushrooms. Okay.
- 3:41That's what I'm doing.
- 3:42So as your friend, if you don't love mushroom coffee,
- 3:45that's the advice I'm giving you. And so far it's working.
- 3:47I can't even taste it in my Verona.
- 3:49It hasn't ruined it. Okay.
- 3:51You know what that has to do with anything?
- 3:53Nothing. All right.
- 3:54Let's just go to Liz because she's got a lot better going on, but here's the thing.
- 3:59She's going to tell you something about the Trinity that helps us understand our
- 4:03belonging to God and our relationship with the family that could be just
- 4:07startling for you and so inspiring.
- 4:10I can't wait for you to hear it.
- 4:12So I'm going to introduce you to my new friend, Liz.
- 4:14She's a hospital chaplain and she's a teacher and she's a theologian.
- 4:20She's an author.
- 4:20And here's what she does, which is interesting.
- 4:23She integrates academic theology and biblical scholarship with
- 4:29research-based clinical interventions. Okay?
- 4:33She graduated way high from Dallas Theological Seminary
- 4:38with a degree, a master's degree in chaplaincy and ministry care.
- 4:41And she keeps serving there, right in that seminary in the
- 4:45theological studies department. Okay.
- 4:47The woman is pretty amazing.
- 4:49She's married, she's got some kids, and she's got great insight.
- 4:53So just settle in, enjoy your coffee as you listen to me and Liz Daye.
- 5:07[INTERVIEW BEGINS] All right, Liz, first off, I'm gonna share, uh,
- 5:10with our listeners what I read about you. Okay?
- 5:13This is part of your official bio.
- 5:15It says Liz Daye is an autistic hospital chaplain, teacher,
- 5:20and theologian with a passion for accessible theology and
- 5:25relationship-based discipleship. Okay.
- 5:29Now we could talk for 30 minutes just about the attributes that are in that bio.
- 5:34Okay?
- 5:35But if it's okay with you, I really want to know, are you autistic?
- 5:39And what exactly does that mean?
- 5:42Yeah, so I was diagnosed as an adult.
- 5:45And I am excited because I feel like growing up, I struggled to find language
- 5:51to explain what was going on in my brain and in my body.
- 5:55So I think even just having— knowing that this book in particular,
- 5:59this book that's really about belonging and finding new vocabulary for our faith,
- 6:04that it's coming from this perspective of somebody who's been looking for
- 6:07language for a really long time.
- 6:09And I hope that these different parts of my life and these different experiences
- 6:13that I've had can contribute meaningfully to this work.
- 6:17Well, I know it has to because it just, it deepens the message.
- 6:22And it also really gives you a platform for credibility.
- 6:26Because I think autism, that's why it was my first question.
- 6:30It is so misunderstood.
- 6:31And maybe it's because it's so nuanced that it shows up differently
- 6:35with each person.
- 6:36Yeah, I think, and everybody has a different relationship with their body.
- 6:40All of us experience the spectrum in very different ways.
- 6:43We have different support needs.
- 6:45And those are always going to look different.
- 6:47So knowing, first of all, being able to name what you
- 6:50need, and then know what you need and recognize it in that moment,
- 6:53that takes time to kind of figure out.
- 6:55And there's some trial and error involved, especially if you have limited
- 6:58support or less resources.
- 7:00There's, there's a whole lot there.
- 7:01But yeah, I'm excited to maybe surprise people with maybe a different
- 7:06way of experiencing my body and my brain.
- 7:10Yeah, I love that.
- 7:11And you're basing so much of it on something that, that I didn't expect.
- 7:17Okay, so let me put it this way.
- 7:20So like, when I read your bio, you make theology accessible,
- 7:24which I so highly regard and appreciate.
- 7:27And so I'm going to ask you a question.
- 7:29been about something that is usually not accessible, the Trinity.
- 7:35Okay, because you base a lot of what you're teaching in this book
- 7:38on the relationship of the Trinity.
- 7:40Okay, so first of all, explain to us what the Trinity
- 7:43is for someone who may not know.
- 7:44I mean, as much as we humans can.
- 7:46And then tell us what we can learn from the Trinity about relationships.
- 7:52Yeah, so I think one of the core Christian convictions that most of us share,
- 7:56you know, we fight about lots of things, but one of the things that
- 7:59we share is that God is one.
- 8:01And God is 3 persons: Father, Son, Holy Spirit, right?
- 8:05We have these 2 things in tension.
- 8:06God is one, God is 3.
- 8:08But this really important part of our faith is that God is alive.
- 8:12And so I think when we're looking for language to talk about the Trinity,
- 8:15usually we get like a triangle-shaped graphic with like the Father on the top,
- 8:19and sometimes you have some like different directions pointing in different ways.
- 8:23But a lot of those graphics and a lot of those things that we, you know, rely on
- 8:28to communicate our faith, a lot of them— Hmm.
- 8:31are missing the language that God is moving and God is alive and God is at work
- 8:36in the world and in our relationships.
- 8:38So one of the reasons that I wanted to write about the Trinity and kind of bring
- 8:43some of this really academic, like gross Latin, Greek, you know, these,
- 8:49these terms that are just really inaccessible for most of us,
- 8:52and I wanted to translate them to a way that actually this doctrine is
- 8:57really important to our faith.
- 8:58It is important that we know how to communicate --
- 9:01Hmm. -- that God is alive.
- 9:02We're resurrection people, and what that looks like in our
- 9:05relationships with one another, what that looks like as the church.
- 9:09So, that's kind of the framing for my approach,
- 9:13and what I hope readers take away as, you know, this scary doctrine maybe
- 9:18becomes a little bit less scary, right?
- 9:20Right, because it shouldn't be.
- 9:21This is the foundation of our faith.
- 9:23So, let me just ask you something unexpected that I'm going to mispronounce.
- 9:26Okay, Perichoresis? Yes.
- 9:29Okay, so that's— yeah.
- 9:31Talk about that, because I think when you said movement, that helped me.
- 9:34So talk about that, please.
- 9:36Fix my word and then explain it.
- 9:38No, your word is perfect.
- 9:39So perichoresis, this is that term where we get the vocabulary for movement.
- 9:45So in, you know, with the early church fathers,
- 9:48they're looking for language to describe God.
- 9:50We have all these different councils that are, you know,
- 9:53Dudes are writing letters back and forth, trying to find the best
- 9:57ways to articulate.
- 9:58And this was one of those words that came up during that period of time
- 10:03to really give language to the fact that God is moving, God is alive, God is
- 10:09moving around, inseparable, interdependent, constantly in motion.
- 10:16That's really where we get a lot of this accessible language,
- 10:19especially when we start talking about like a Shalom-shaped communion.
- 10:24All of this language—Yeah.
- 10:25comes directly from this really scary, really weird-sounding
- 10:29thing that actually isn't that scary when we start taking a look at it.
- 10:33So, Liz, just because you are a theologian, I want us to dive
- 10:36even just a little bit deeper.
- 10:38Yeah.
- 10:39Okay, so is, in your understanding of the Trinity,
- 10:43we have God the Father, Jesus the Son, Holy Spirit.
- 10:48Is there a hierarchy?
- 10:50Because God is one, so there is equality, yet is there a hierarchy?
- 10:54So based on historic Christian teaching, there is no hierarchy in
- 10:58the Godhead, right?
- 10:59There is no— there's no, you know, ranking of importance.
- 11:04There is no, you know, one was first, second, third.
- 11:08None of that is language that is appropriate for when we're talking
- 11:12about Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
- 11:14Over and over, the testimony of Scripture, when we really look at the whole
- 11:18story of it, we see this God that is power-sharing and overflowing with love.
- 11:25Hmm.
- 11:26And it's, God is much less concerned with power and
- 11:30authority and hierarchy and much more concerned with sharing love and sharing
- 11:35goodness with the world and promoting shalom.
- 11:38So I think that, yeah, even just reimagining some of the ways
- 11:41that we think about power and hierarchy, what might it look like and how might our
- 11:46faith be affected if we started reimagining that a little bit,
- 11:51maybe reevaluating where we've internalized some of those assumptions.
- 11:54Hmm. Specifically about God the Father.
- 11:56Yeah, yeah, I agree with that, Liz, too.
- 11:58And when you think about it, because the Trinity really— they're all
- 12:01out loving each other, out serving each other.
- 12:03I mean, that's really what they're doing.
- 12:05And so if you're looking at that as the template for how we relate to each other
- 12:11in what you called a shalom-shaped community, okay, break that down for me.
- 12:15What in your definition is a shalom-shaped community?
- 12:19Right, so when we're looking at the very beginning at the Hebrew Bible,
- 12:22starting in Genesis 1 and 2, when everything that God made was
- 12:26perfect and wonderful and beautiful.
- 12:29That is the best picture of shalom that we have in the Bible, right?
- 12:33It's in picture form where all of creation is living in right relationship.
- 12:39Everybody's doing what they're supposed to do.
- 12:42The trees are cooperating.
- 12:43Like, everything in nature is rightly related.
- 12:48When sin comes in and destroys that and fractures that and breaks that Then now
- 12:54our new mission, you know, as resurrection people is to be people of
- 12:58shalom because the way that it started, that's our, that's our
- 13:01destiny in Revelation.
- 13:03When it's all said and done, God is going to bring us back
- 13:06to this shalom-shaped communion.
- 13:09And so I think promoting that and living that out, like practicing now how we're
- 13:14going to be living for eternity, is again where we get just
- 13:18a consistent vocabulary for a way to be with one another in the world.
- 13:22Yeah.
- 13:23Yeah, I'm loving this.
- 13:24Okay, so let's take that from the pages of the Bible to our church pews.
- 13:29Okay, so what does this look like, like this shared siblinghood?
- 13:33What, what would it look like in everyday church life?
- 13:36I think, you know, for us, we've experienced this.
- 13:39And I, you know, in other conversations we've
- 13:42talked about, you know, does your church structure need to change,
- 13:45or does the way that you have your programs, you know, organized,
- 13:48does that need to change?
- 13:49You can live this way regardless of how your church is structured, right?
- 13:53And I think part of it is just— is paying attention to suffering.
- 13:57That's a really big part of the work that I do as a chaplain.
- 14:00But it's also something that my church is just very good at,
- 14:04making space to pay attention and slow down enough to say, okay,
- 14:09I see that something's happening here.
- 14:11How can I enter in and be with this person?
- 14:15And that creates space for a lot of really interesting things to happen,
- 14:20but it creates space for the Holy Spirit to, to be a part of that moment.
- 14:25So I think that we're looking at how do we live this way and how do we enact it?
- 14:29It's not a checklist of things that we need to do.
- 14:32It's really just an approach of how can I make sure that I am,
- 14:36I'm really experiencing the people that I'm with, that I'm slowing
- 14:39down enough to pay attention.
- 14:42And yeah, I think, I don't know about you, but we, I tend, I have 4 kids.
- 14:48We live busy lives.
- 14:49You know, we're always, you know, bopping around all over the
- 14:51place and slowing down can be very challenging.
- 14:55Yeah.
- 14:57Yeah.
- 14:57And a little unsettling because it's easier.
- 14:59Yeah.
- 15:00It's easier just to speed through, you know, as you're describing it,
- 15:03I'm thinking it's like the difference between Liz, a formula and family.
- 15:08You know, we come in with our church life, our life in Christ.
- 15:11Here's the formula.
- 15:12I do my devotionals, I do this, I go serve the poor, I come home, I read my Bible.
- 15:16Yeah.
- 15:17That's so different than just, I'm part of the family.
- 15:20Yeah.
- 15:20And I'm gonna be a sister today, and I'm gonna be available to love and to
- 15:25serve and to do nothing if I need to do nothing.
- 15:28And it's so different.
- 15:30But it— I can see how, let's be honest, there's a little insecurity there because
- 15:34it's easier to have a formula and be in the fast lane.
- 15:37Yep. Whew, okay, this is really good.
- 15:39Yeah.
- 15:40All right, so you're talking a lot about discipleship, obviously,
- 15:44though that's just a word, you know, that I try to
- 15:48not avoid, but I try not to overuse it because I think it sounds formulaic again.
- 15:53And you're really talking about relationships that spur us on to shalom
- 15:58and deeper life in Christ.
- 16:00So I'm curious how your work, because it's so interesting what you've
- 16:04done as a hospital chaplain, you've seen a lot,
- 16:07you've dealt with a lot of trauma care, I'm curious how that's changed your
- 16:11understanding of what I just called discipleship.
- 16:14Yeah, I think, you know, even just based on
- 16:17my own family's experience shuttling kids back and forth to the
- 16:21children's hospital and things like that, I came to experience this dissonance where
- 16:28I couldn't check the boxes the way that I really want.
- 16:32I wanted to be a good faithful Christian, right?
- 16:34I wanted to check the boxes and be a reliable volunteer
- 16:38and show up when I was supposed to show up and, you know, contribute what
- 16:42I was supposed to contribute.
- 16:43And especially when we were in this several-year season of just being back and
- 16:48forth in the hospital, I couldn't do that.
- 16:50And I realized that in part I couldn't do it because we're not supposed to
- 16:54approach our faith that way.
- 16:55So in that season, I learned how to receive as a sister,
- 17:00and that was really meaningful to me.
- 17:01But it also helped me make space to say, you know what, even if I'm not productive,
- 17:06I'm still a part of this family.
- 17:08And even if I, you know, need to say, I'm a person, I need space right now.
- 17:14I need to rest. My soul needs rest.
- 17:16You know, my family's going to want that for me because they love me.
- 17:19And so I think even just remembering that the family of God is special,
- 17:24and it's supposed to be something that promotes safety and promotes healing
- 17:29and wholeness for all of us, especially those of us
- 17:32that are suffering or that are going through a hard diagnosis or a trauma or an
- 17:37accident or something beyond our control.
- 17:40Those, those boxes, you'll find they limit us very quickly and they
- 17:44marginalize people very quickly.
- 17:47And because when you're in the hospital, you can't even think straight
- 17:52enough to check a box. Right.
- 17:54Yeah.
- 17:54So I think even especially in those weeks where I just,
- 17:58I wasn't sleeping, I was caregiving, I was very tired.
- 18:01I wanted to make sure that I could ground myself in something
- 18:04that was true about God.
- 18:05So when I'm in the hospital and I'm either with a patient or I'm with one of my
- 18:09children or whatever the case is, I'm asking, what is God like here?
- 18:13Because I need to ask that so that I can know what's true.
- 18:17And so that in that moment, I can have comfort that is rooted in truth,
- 18:22that is rooted in something real.
- 18:24And that's what it looks like to promote that kind of discipleship, because that
- 18:28shouldn't be an individual thing, right?
- 18:29We should be doing that in community with each other.
- 18:32When we're going through hard stuff, we need to remind one another the truth
- 18:35about the Triune God, that God is with us, that the incarnation is a big
- 18:40deal because God is with us.
- 18:42So yeah, I mean, I think that that just gives us space to practice
- 18:46compassion and to really live out this faith.
- 18:50I think practicing compassion is a much better word than,
- 18:54or a much better phrase than discipleship. Yeah.
- 18:56Right.
- 18:57Because it encompasses all of the different things that we can do.
- 19:00Right? Right.
- 19:01And even just the way that we can just exist without doing anything!
- 19:04Right, right. Yeah.
- 19:06Just being and being together.
- 19:08And you know, I love that you kind of reframed the situation where,
- 19:13what is God like right now?
- 19:15Because often we think of, okay, what is my situation like right now?
- 19:19Or how do I feel right now?
- 19:21And you're saying in the midst of these difficult situations, you're looking,
- 19:25okay, what is God like right now?
- 19:27Who is He right now?
- 19:30Because that is the grounding reality.
- 19:32That's really beautiful.
- 19:34And so you mentioned And Liz, compassion.
- 19:38And so let's go another place that could be somewhat controversial, okay?
- 19:42Because some Christians, I think because of a misunderstanding or
- 19:46because of the political charge of certain phrases, they get all freaked out when
- 19:51they hear the words social justice, okay?
- 19:54Yeah.
- 19:55All right, so let's talk about that.
- 19:57What role should justice socially and compassion play in our everyday
- 20:02family life as the family of God?
- 20:05Yeah, I think when I look at Scripture, again, I'm always going
- 20:08to turn to Scripture.
- 20:09That's my primary lens through which I want to view the world
- 20:12and encounter God, right?
- 20:14So when I'm thinking about Scripture, and when I'm thinking about the concept of
- 20:17justice specifically, you know, justice and righteousness
- 20:21aren't something that the Bible separates.
- 20:24They're two sides of the same coin.
- 20:26So really, it's the way that we're living as righteous believers,
- 20:32That is going to translate to just living and living justly in right relationship.
- 20:39And I think when we let those 2 kind of sets of vocabulary talk to each other,
- 20:44like the language of righteousness and holiness and the language of justice,
- 20:47we realize that we have to do these things in community.
- 20:51And we can't— we— the Christian faith, the testimony of Scripture doesn't let us
- 20:57live faith alone, isolated by ourselves.
- 21:01And so much of the teaching of Scripture is now that we are resurrection people
- 21:06representing a God that is alive in the world, what does that look like?
- 21:10How do we shine brightly?
- 21:12We do that through our relationships.
- 21:15So think about the fruit of the Holy Spirit.
- 21:17Every single one of those things, they're not, again, they're not
- 21:20things that you check off on a box. Yeah.
- 21:23They are, they're, they describe the way that relationships should be lived.
- 21:28There should be goodness.
- 21:29In relationships, if you go down that list, it shouldn't feel like a list.
- 21:34It should just feel like, oh yeah, this is what I want to promote
- 21:38in these different ways of you know being a parent, being a friend,
- 21:41being a minister, being a neighbor, being a person.
- 21:45And then I think that we can, forgetting all the hot button buzzwords
- 21:50and all of the politically charged language,
- 21:53I think that just scripture and just looking at it through that lens gives us
- 21:57enough of a framework to remember that we have a responsibility
- 22:01to our communities and to the people that are around us,
- 22:03especially to the vulnerable.
- 22:05And we need to take our Christian responsibility seriously
- 22:09to live as compassionate people, to represent a compassionate God in
- 22:13the world, and to promote goodness.
- 22:15I think that that's really important.
- 22:17And again, there's not room in the New Testament,
- 22:21there's not room in scripture to live a private faith by yourself,
- 22:25disconnected from everybody else.
- 22:27We don't get that luxury. Yeah.
- 22:29So yeah, I hope that we can invite one another into relationship, into communion,
- 22:35into community with God, not just as our template, but God
- 22:38is inviting us into the life of God. It's—
- 22:41yeah.
- 22:42Yeah.
- 22:42Liz, this is a good conversation for us all to
- 22:45have together because I think sometimes we, I mean, we,
- 22:49we are, our hearts are so confused sometimes and we become so self-centered.
- 22:54My faith, my Jesus, my personal Savior, my this, my that.
- 22:57And we're in the family and, and The nature of Christianity and
- 23:03being Christlike is deeply relational.
- 23:06And so what a good reminder.
- 23:09Yeah, we don't have the fruits of the Spirit so we can feed ourselves.
- 23:11So that's a beautiful thing.
- 23:14And so as we're talking about this community, you write about
- 23:18cultivating communities of inclusion, reciprocity, and mutual care.
- 23:25Okay.
- 23:25Those are 3 very interesting words that I want us to kind of hit: inclusion,
- 23:29reciprocity, and mutual care.
- 23:32Okay, so first of all, how do we do this?
- 23:35And if we do, what does it look like?
- 23:38It's gonna look a lot of different ways because again, when we talk about
- 23:40inclusion, there's not just one way.
- 23:42That's the whole point is we want to make space for more than just one experience to
- 23:47feel like they belong and that they matter.
- 23:49So that means we're going to pay attention to who's around us,
- 23:53who's in our community, and we're gonna get uncomfortable really
- 23:58fast because You know, if you have, for example, a friend that's going through
- 24:02a really tricky divorce, and she's trying to decide,
- 24:06is it safe for me to go to church?
- 24:07Am I going to belong there?
- 24:08Is she really going to belong there?
- 24:10Like, do we nod and smile and have our slogans that say you belong here?
- 24:14Or are we actually going to say, you know what,
- 24:17I recognize that this situation needs something even more specific, right?
- 24:23And that specificity is really where we show love for one another.
- 24:26Yeah.
- 24:27It's really easy to do things generally, but when we get specific,
- 24:31when we get personal, when we know names and faces
- 24:34and what their hands feel like, that, that makes everything a little bit different.
- 24:40Um, so that's the inclusion part is, that's kind of where I would start there.
- 24:44What was the next one?
- 24:46Reciprocity. Reciprocity.
- 24:47Okay.
- 24:48This is, this is huge for especially those of us in evangelicalism, right?
- 24:53Because We're told a lot of times that it's,
- 24:57you know, you're more blessed to give than to receive.
- 24:59We have all these messages about being generous, and this is good, right?
- 25:03Generosity is a good Christian virtue.
- 25:06And also, the gospel is something we receive, and we receive it freely.
- 25:12So even just making space to say, yes, I'm going to be a generous person,
- 25:17and there are going to be times where I need to receive,
- 25:21and I need to be willing to receive.
- 25:23And having that mindset of, yes, there's going to be giving, and yes,
- 25:28there's going to be receiving.
- 25:29Otherwise, if we're only giving, giving, giving, giving, giving,
- 25:34it creates subtle hierarchy between people who feel really, really good that they're
- 25:38the givers all the time, um, and, and people who can't give as
- 25:44much or can't be recognized.
- 25:45And that's, that's not how God's family is supposed to work, right?
- 25:49We have this Romans 16 picture of God's family, you know, living in reciprocity,
- 25:55giving and sharing with the poor, sharing with one another,
- 25:58living in vibrant community, communion, living not just on
- 26:02Sunday, but every single day.
- 26:05So it's just a different kind of picture of living that— I don't know, like,
- 26:11I remember there was one time I was volunteering for Vacation Bible School
- 26:14several years ago.
- 26:15They're doing this big fundraising situation,
- 26:19and all of the parents were in the back with their checkbooks because they wanted
- 26:23to win the fundraising competition. I love that.
- 26:26And I'm just thinking, like, these are 4th and 5th graders.
- 26:30This is— this doesn't feel like it matches, right?
- 26:34Yeah, right.
- 26:36And like little things like that.
- 26:37But those are— they're theological choices that we're making, right?
- 26:41We need to have vocabulary to say, this is really what God's family is
- 26:46supposed to look like and live like and act like.
- 26:49And we have to have the language so that we can have healthier communities
- 26:53and healthier attitudes.
- 26:54Especially towards, I know it is frustrating to say I need something.
- 26:59It is humbling and it is, yeah, all the things.
- 27:03I mean, it's sad to feel like you have a need that's not going to be met.
- 27:09And I think the more that we can be with one another in those unmet needs,
- 27:15beautiful things happen there. They really do.
- 27:17Well, when you think about it, Liz, that is the mutual care.
- 27:20Yeah. -- you're describing.
- 27:22And for us to be prideful and say, nope, I'm the giver, I don't have needs.
- 27:26Yeah.
- 27:27It's truly robbing your sister or brother from their mandate to meet your needs
- 27:32and to receive the blessing for helping.
- 27:34And it doesn't esteem them.
- 27:36So one of the things I, I don't know if you know this about me,
- 27:38but my friends that listen do, is that I'm blind.
- 27:42And one of the hardest things for me is always asking for help.
- 27:45And I remember one time I was talking to Joni Eareckson Tada, Yeah.
- 27:49Who's, you know, been in a wheelchair her whole life.
- 27:51I was talking to her about my frustration that I always feel like a burden.
- 27:54I hate asking people for help.
- 27:57And she said she had to make that shift, that she realizes when she asks someone
- 28:02like to open a door for her at a restaurant, she's giving them
- 28:05an opportunity to feel esteemed.
- 28:09And it changed my view of recognizing I still don't love needing,
- 28:14you know, I would rather be able to do things myself.
- 28:15Yeah. Of course.
- 28:17But humility is never a bad thing.
- 28:20And oh, what our own personal humility grants someone else can be so life-giving.
- 28:25And that's part of being in a family.
- 28:27So I think that's kind of what you're describing.
- 28:28Yes? No?
- 28:29Yeah, absolutely.
- 28:30I mean, I think, in a sense, we do get to model that for
- 28:34our, our brothers and sisters in the family, right?
- 28:37We may feel it and experience it a different way.
- 28:40But yeah, and even just recognizing we do all have needs, some of them are more
- 28:45physical, and they— we notice them more.
- 28:49But yeah, we all have needs and we should all delight in receiving
- 28:53care and offering care.
- 28:54There's so much goodness there.
- 28:56There really is. So much goodness.
- 28:58This is such a good conversation, Liz.
- 29:00I, I'm so grateful you've written a book.
- 29:02I think it's going to be a great book to dive deep into.
- 29:05We're going to get to our last question though on this conversation,
- 29:09because you know, this is the place where thoughtful people come to grow.
- 29:13And boy, have you given us a lot to think about.
- 29:16But my last question for you is this.
- 29:18Give me something that's really helped you.
- 29:20What is something you'd recommend that over the years perhaps
- 29:23has helped you grow?
- 29:25Yeah, I think one of the biggest things that I
- 29:28had to learn, especially as a chaplain, I needed to walk much slower.
- 29:33Or as my friend who is in a wheelchair reminds me, I need to move
- 29:36through the world much slower.
- 29:38Typically, when we get a code at the hospital, I have to
- 29:41respond to every situation.
- 29:43If I am out of breath and having an asthma attack by the time I get there,
- 29:47I'm not going to be an effective minister.
- 29:49Right.
- 29:49So I have learned that while there is urgency, I am also not
- 29:54the one doing CPR, right? Nobody wants that.
- 29:57I need to remember that for me to do good work, I have to move slower.
- 30:02For me to check in with my body so that I can care for everybody else in the room,
- 30:07I need to slow down enough to make space for myself as a person,
- 30:14myself as a minister, not because I'm being selfish,
- 30:16but because I really want to make sure that I'm doing my best work and caring
- 30:20for people in a way that's meaningful.
- 30:23If I'm so busy and I'm so distracted, I'm not even in my body,
- 30:27I'm not going to represent God well in that situation, right?
- 30:30Especially if it's a life and death moment.
- 30:33So I think just really— And obviously not every situation is a
- 30:37life and death moment, but sometimes they are.
- 30:40Yeah, yeah, yeah. Moving slower makes a big difference.
- 30:44It really does. [INTERVIEW ENDS]
- 30:53Good stuff, Liz.
- 30:55Good stuff.
- 30:56Did you hear, my friends, that she said that if you want to grow,
- 31:00walk much slower?
- 31:03Walk much slower.
- 31:06Move through the world a little more slowly.
- 31:09And did you hear her say that if you If you can't breathe, you can't minister.
- 31:13Yeah.
- 31:14If you're running so fast that you're hyperventilating,
- 31:16how can you serve others?
- 31:18I just love it.
- 31:19So her book, by the way, it's a great reminder of who you are in the family.
- 31:26So, so let's love each other well, my friends, and let's focus more on
- 31:30being family than following formulas.
- 31:34All you heard today, you can find, of course, at the show notes
- 31:37by reading the transcript.
- 31:38Again, it's easy for you to share the podcast from there.
- 31:42You can get her book.
- 31:43I just want you to get what you need to keep growing and to keep thinking.
- 31:48And let us just be who God's called us to be for him and for each other.
- 31:54All right. Have a great week.
- 31:56I can't wait till you join me again next week at the Jennifer Rothschild Show.