Latest / Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis (Jason Newland) / (no music) Whisper Wednesday | LMBYTS #1378 | Jason Newland | 18th June 2025

Transcript

(no music) Whisper Wednesday | LMBYTS #1378 | Jason Newland | 18th June 2025 · Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis (Jason Newland)

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hello, and welcome to fugitive any I think that he
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: is getting to him a little bit. It's getting to
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: me a little bit. It's making me do strange things.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: It's not so hello, welcome to let me boy. You
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: just let me boy to sleep. This is Whisper Wednesday.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: It's still I don't know what time. It is, about
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: four o'clock two, but it's the four peer. Please only
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: listen when you can safely close your eye. I've been
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: waiting all day to do this because there's a building
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: work going on opposite me in the flat opposite Norway.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: It's not in all Way, but the flat when you
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: go out the front door the opposite door. In there,
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: he's having his bathroom redone and he's had his bath
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: taken out today. Now I can't readly complain about the
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: noise because it's been pretty quiet. It's far enough away
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: to not really affect me too much. But the other
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: side of it is I need to keep Finny occupied
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: auditarily because if he has movement out of the front door,
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: he's got a bit of barking. So this is the
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: first moment of the whole day where there hasn't been
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: music or some kind of something that he can listen
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: to distract him apart from when we've been out. So
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: I'm not sure how he's going to react when he
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: because the bath is actually in the doorway, the one
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: they've removed, so when they drag that down the stairs,
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: I'm guessing Vinnie will give some type of response which
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: is understandable. Wow. Okay, So I'm guessing it's the artist
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: day of the year so far, and I probably could
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: do wearing shorts or wearing not much inside. But I
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: can't walk around in just me Londi's because I've got
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: no curtains up. I washed my curtains at the weekend
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: and I just haven't bothered to put them back up yet.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: Even though it'll take me probably five minutes, I'll put
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: it off. Actually it might have been two weeks ago
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: I did it. So I want to say thank you
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: to Ben, and you know why. Ben knows why as
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: long as I thank you for your messages. And I
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: have made a few changes to day, not a lot
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: of changes, just a couple, only one that may affect people.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: I'm not doing it to affect people. I'm just doing
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: it because basically, here's what I've done I have. I've
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: decided to get rid of the website. I do have
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: like a backup plan in place, a redirection, but I'm
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: waiting for it to kick in because it's not working
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: at the moment. So the website. I did have another
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: website building as well, so that's gone also. So the
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: website's gone. I was getting so few visits. It really
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: wasn't financially viable. It's like sixty six dollars a month
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: for twenty twenty visitors maybe a day. It just wasn't. Yeah,
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: couldn't keep it going. So I've let that go for now.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: I've tried to redirect the domain name, which is Jasonneuland
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: dot com, to my podcast page, which has all my
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: podcasts on or why actually yeah, so like the main podcast.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: What I haven't done, which is really important, is I've
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: not deleted any podcasts. I'm not having some weird thing
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: going on. Nothing's being deleted a part from the website.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: All the podcasts are running just like normal, including the
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: speaker ones, the SoundCloud ones, and so wherever you listen
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: online it's still there. Nothing's changed. A couple of other
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: things I've done trying to reduce my outgoings because this
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: financial changes come in my way, hopefully good ones, because
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: I've I bought some lot of tickets this week, but
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: I have got rid of a few things I don't
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: need to pay out for that perhaps I don't need anymore,
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: and they were making life easier, but I can kind
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: of do around around them. Because my PIP, which is
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: like a disability thing that's up very few I think soon,
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: and the government have changed it. Chances I won't get anything,
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: so I can't even need to prepare for that. Also,
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: there's no longer any adverts on the webs on their
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: third podcasts, not that that was really wasn't that was
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: not Sometimes I didn't even cover the cost and running
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: all the different things, but it's okay, so that's all gone.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: I got rid of Canvas, which was the editing software
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: that I use for editing the images. So Canvas now gone.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: I was like thirteen pounds a month. I've got rid
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: of the transcription because I was adding transcriptions to the
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: podcasts and to the website and looking at maybe putting
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: a book together, but that's probably not going to happen
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: anytime soon. So I got rid of that transcription, which
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: was twenty twenty pound a month. I've kept chat chet
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: GPT because that's what I use for the images to
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: create the images. That Canva was the finalized all and
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: put it together. So yeah, I'll be using only chet GPT.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of anything else that I've managed
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: to offload Canver transcription the website, but no, so the
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: podcast stumpaign, I think fifty five pounds a month for Spreaker,
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: So that's that's doable. I manage that, and there will
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: come in time when they will start to charge me
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: more if I keep increasing the amount of recordings that
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: around there, which is going to happen naturally. All my
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: old recordings that on my website, you know that let
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: me Boy to Sleep one to fifty and then fifty one,
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: two hundred, et cetera. All those podcasts of my spreaker page.
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: So yeah, it's all all available. You just need to
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: just I posted the link to the spreaker page which
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: has all my podcasts. I posted on my Facebook which
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: is Jason Newland's boring group. You know what I said
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: other things, I spent a good couple of days really
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: promoting the Facebook group, like really going all out. I
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: made a podcast just specifically to try and get a
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: few more members, and that and some other stuff I did,
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: And after all that, I've got one. I've got two
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: new members, both the same person, and both two different
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: Facebook pages with one person the same name. So I'm
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: wondering whether or not Facebook is really the place where
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: people gather anymore. I don't know. Maybe because I'm not
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: really on Twitter. I don't know. I think people find
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: my stuff when they when they want to, when they
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: I'm not hard to find online. Just my name, Jason
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: Newland easy to find. I'm all over the place, not
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: just mentally, but I'm all you know, I'm on all
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: the main podcast hosts, so it's very easy to find me.
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: Of course, I'm also on sound Cloud. Someone's having a
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: good old cough outside Miss. You could say it's a
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: perfect day to day. It's a blue sky, a little
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: bit of breeze, a little bit, not a lot, a
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: little bit because I took Vinny out put it about
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: an hour ago and we went to the park. At
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: one point we were sitting. When I was sitting, I
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: was standing under the tree where he was standing under
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: the tree and against some shade. As I was standing
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: there with it. He had his tongue out, and well,
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: I had my tongue out as well. And the breeze,
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: it was glorious, Such a glorious breeze. His necks is
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: so weird. Okay, none of the other people around was
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: staring at him. He had his tongue out, but why
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: were he staring at me? So I came home with
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: some clothes on, and I had a shower today before
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: going out. I mean, not the first time I've had
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: a shower. This is the first time I've had a
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: shower today. So I had hit about or two o'clock
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: before I went out. I was sweating like I'd had
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: a shower, dried myself off, like completely dried myself off.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: Water was growing out my ears. I couldn't believe it.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: It was just there was a puddle in my shoes.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: That wasn't a puzzle with my shoes. I swamp, but
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: there wasn't a swamp. Why am I saying that? I
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: don't know. I never know, But yeah, it was nice.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: It's a little it was a little bit too hot
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: for the little one. And there he is making him tired.
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: It's fast asleep, even though he was awake when I
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: started this, he's completely exhausted. I can always tell as well,
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: because when I go to get up out of the chair,
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: you know, when he's sort of half asleep or just rested,
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: you'll jump up with me. But just now, before I
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: started this, I went over and got my to go
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: and put stuff away before coming back. He didn't want
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: to move. It was just lying there like really, it's like,
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: what do you want? You're just staring at me? Why
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: they got get up? Now? I've been listening to some
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: Richard Bandler videos from probably the early eighties, late seventies,
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: early eighties, probably late eight early eighties, and Richard Bandlow
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: is the co creative of newer linguistic programming, normally known
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: as NLP, but now NLP is also known as is
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: it natural language programming or something? In computers? So NLP
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: kind of has more than one meaning now a little
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: bit like CBT. I actually remember, and this is totally true.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: I was at college, and when I was here in university,
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: we had to learn about other therapies as well. Because
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: I was studying persons entered the counseling, which is what
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: Jerian therapy, Carl Rogers and all that stuff but we
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: also had to look at other things. Gestolled psychotherapy, psychoanalysis, behaviorism,
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: all that stuff, and CBT got cognitive behavioral therapy and
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: also my dad's and his wife was there and theys
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: all said, what you doing is I've just been studying CBT,
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: and she said, what's that? I said, I'll show you.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: So I got by now and wait Google if n
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: did Natty? I think it was a laptop or I'm
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: not sure if I even had a phone that could
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: do the Internet back then. So I went to her
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: laptop or a computer. I said, I'll show you. So
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: I put CBT into Google. Now I didn't realize that
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: there's more than one CBT. There's at least three. Now.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: I made the mistake, and I did. There was a
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: time when you could just put I feel lucky. So
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: you put CBT and then click I feel lucky and
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: it will just come up with the the you know,
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: our website to death to or chosen. I don't know
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: if any remembers that. It's a long time ago. Well,
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: I didn't realize there's three different CBTs. There's one CBT
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: which is the motorbike test. So in order to get
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: to ride a motorbike or motorcycle or maybe moped. I
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: don't know. I think it's a motorbike. It's called a CBT.
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: I don't know what stands for something training. And then
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: there's another one CBT that's the website that came up,
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: and there was a really explicit image apparently mine. My
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: stepmm's like standing next to me, and I'm pointing out
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: that this is what I'm doing, so I press. I
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: feel lucky, you know, as I clicked that, and my
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: dad calls me over. He said, old, what do you want?
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: Do you want to do you want to beer? Or
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: do you want a whiskey? So I'm looking at him.
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: I said, I just have a beer, beer please, And
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: my stepma says, so that's what you're studying the university
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: And I said yeah, and I can't busy focusing on
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: my dad and she said really, I said yeah, why?
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: So I turned back and it was the third one
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: and I was this big image and not something you
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: particularly want to watch online with your step parent. Cock
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: and Ball told you that's what CBD stood for. There,
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: it's not even a joke. This really happened. At least.
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: I was very surprised because I've never even heard of that.
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: I mean really, it's like, I don't not really talk
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: stuff like this, but I'm just saying this is real.
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: It's like what CBT. I was like, No, that's not
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: what I'm learning at university is cognitive behavioral therapy. She said,
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: but you said CBT. I said, yeah, that is CBT.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: This this also apparently is okay CBT, fair enough, but
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: it's not the CPT. Why would Google? They wouldn't do
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: that now, but why back then? You know, demount stuff
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: that they're just chucking it without even like I don't
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: want that. I want something different. I'm not looking for that. Ah,
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: it's anyway. So do you ever hear voices? Okay, I
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: mean I'm talking like real voices, and sometimes I don't
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: know if it's a person talking, or if it's a
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: person on a mobile phone talking like a speaker, or
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: if it's a radio or if it's a television. Do
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: you ever get that? And like it's like continuous talking.
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: It's almost like it's not there's no pauses. So maybe
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: there's two people talking, mind you, I've known people that
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: just talk and talk and talk. Yeah, my landlady used
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: to be like that. She used to talk to me.
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: I'd be in the toil and She'll still be talking
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: to me. Seriously. I'd actually be on the toill and
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: she to still be saying whatever she was talking about.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: I was like, why are you still talking? She used
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: to like me when I first moved in there, my
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: landlady this is him back in nineteen ninety one, and
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: then in nineteen ninety three, kind of near the end
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: of the year ish, we had a new person move in,
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: and I think she fell in love with him, and
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: he was always around doing stuff for her and spending
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: time with her, and I mean she I think she
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: invited me into her living room twice. Once was when
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: she told me she was going to kick me out.
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: Another time she wanted me to watch an Italian opera.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: I preferred the eviction one to be fair, and he
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: was in there all the time. I don't know if
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: they cut on. It's not nothing to do me, but
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: he really took a dislike to me and started stirring
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: it up. So I ended up moving out. Oh the
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: eviction that didn't happen. She just said she had enough
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: of me, and I said, oh please, I'll do anything.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: She said anything and I saw that song from that movie.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: I would do anything, anything anything? Was that Doctor Doolittle?
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: I think, I don't know. I don't feel I don't
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: feel like proud of myself by it. She moved down
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: when she was on the toilet. It's true, my back
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: actually didn't. I just I ordered a taxi and I
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: think I packed everything up while she was into black bags,
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: brought them downstairs, and moved out. I couldn't be there
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: anymore because she wasn't being nice to me. I think
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: I kind of over over spent my welcome, as it were.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: But even now, when I think back, I wonder why
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: did I just stay there for so long? It was
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: just a laziness. I don't know. I kind of liked
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: the choir because I lived off or if behind a graveyard,
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: so the run of the house was a cul de sac,
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: so there's no traffic. And then behind the house was
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: it wasn't just a graveyard. There was an old graveyard
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: that not winning. There was a newer graveyard next to
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: it that was active. I used to go for walks there,
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: so it was nice and peaceful. Pay puffles being weird.
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: Do you think I just remember my favorite thing in
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: the world. Really other thing going to comedy clubs was
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: going to the West End buying a book, coming home
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: reading a book, sitting up in bed reading a book.
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: That was That's why I enjoyed doing and I kind
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: of intending to get back to that. I just need
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: to get my eyes tested so that I can start
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: reading again, because my eyesight is a bit boo boo
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: at the moment. That's another another reason why I've kind
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: of I've come to the conclusion that or decision maybe
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: I don't want to spend long periods of time staring
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: at the computer screen. It's not good for my eyes.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: I think it's affecting my eyes because I'm doing it
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: for what twenty twenty five years, like, you know, thousands
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: of thousands and thousands and thousands of hours since two thousand, tiny,
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: I've been staring at the computer screen sometimes ten thirteen,
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: fourteen hours a day, so yeah, thousands upon thousands of hours.
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: And I don't think it's been great for my optical
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: nerves or whatever. And when I take a break from
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: looking at the computer, my eyes do feel better. My
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: eyes that was it sounded like my eyes, my eyes
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: feel more relaxed. I'm Okay, for like an hour or so,
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: that's about it. I think an hour a day, you know,
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: do the editing, and then I blow them and it's done.
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: In fact, I don't even I mean, it's a little
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: bit more staring at the computer purse. I don't need
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: to be online the whole time looking at the over
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: the screen. And also, I think with the way technology
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: is working, especially with things like chat GPT, I can
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: ask it to make new things. Maybe use the chat
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: a bit more, use the microphone and verbally do requests
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: as opposed to typing in so it else, maybe make
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: it a little bit easier, a little bit more thorough,
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: a bit more or less scary computer screen. And it
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: would be nice to get back to reading and learning.
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: But not for any kind of reason other than just
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: for fun. You know. I'm interested in hypnosis. I'm interested
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: in chronic pain relief. I'm interested in techniques to help people.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: Different things that I can say, different ways of saying
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: it that can be useful to help people. So that's
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: not changed. I don't feel any less wanting to help people.
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: If anything more that that desire or that need is,
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: I'd say it's grown stronger as i've got a so,
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: But what I like to do how I like to
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: sort of work things out is I like to learn things,
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: but then just let it all be in my brain
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: and perculate, perculate maybe and just mixed together with all
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: the other stuff so that I can come up with
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: ideas when I'm talking that may be useful. And I
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: suppose it's about feeding my brain with helpful stuff and
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: also things that I'm interested in, because if I'm not
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: interested in something, I might as well just there's there's
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: no point reading it. There's no there's no point in
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: watching something I'm not interested in because I just switch off.
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: I don't I don't take any notice. So I suppose
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: I need to work within my I suppose in some
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: way to limitations. But I like to think of as
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: geniuses work within my genius. M hmm. I'm trying to think.
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: What else has happened today? Not a lot on yesterday.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: There wasn't a g amount of sound really from the neighbor,
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: but there was a fair bit of sound, like I
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: think it was there was other music and things like
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: that from other neighbors. I think it was blocking the noise.
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: So I'm guessing that people downstairs could hear it more
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: than I could, which does make it kind of makes
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: sense because if they're drilling and stuff and breaking concrete
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: into the floor, that's going to affect anyone that shares
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: that ceiling, doesn't it. I suppose. I know I share
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: the floor, but I'm quite far removed. I'm in a room.
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: That's the first I could get away from where he is,
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: not to get away from him, just this is where
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: my living room is, and I've got no no walls
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: that really share. But his next door neighbor does, and
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: downstairs from him does. They both share the same kind
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: of like his bathroom. I'll wait a minute. Is worry
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: in his bedroom he shares with next door but the
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: floor is shared, isn't it really? I guess with next
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: door downstairs Ice Shoe the bathroom, Yeah, the bathroom is
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: ceiling for downstairs would be his bathroom floor. So they
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: can feel it or they can he hear it. But
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: so far, I've heard a bit of banging, a bit
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: of stuff like that. Was that sorry, pepe pee pee
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: pee pew pee pee pee peep pew peep. Now that
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: sounds more like a Space Invaders game or something. Pie
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: peu PuO pew Buck Rogers Pu Pu Pu Star Wars,
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: even Peepy Pew pew Pu. Perhaps that's why I should
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: have done. I should have done voices and sounds. I
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: could have been a I could have been voices, a
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: voice for like animation PuO pew an hour Ard co
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: with that one sound though, But it's why I could
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: sound pure Pu. If only all these things I could
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: have done, I do wonder. I think back to when
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: I was fifteen. I left school when I was even
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: too young to join the army. I was so young.
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: It was just the choices. I mean, some of the
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: choices I couldn't do till I was sixteen. But a
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: lot of things I could have just there wasn't There's
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: the things I wasn't able to do. I couldn't apply
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: to join the police force. I couldn't go to university.
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: There's certain things I wasn't allowed to do because of
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: having no qualifications and leaving school at so early age.
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: Because I left I think it was April nineteen eighty six,
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: and I wasn't sixteen till the end of August, so
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: it's yeah, four months or whatever till I was sixteen,
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: and I was suddenly earning sixty pounds a week working
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: full time, which at fifteen was a huge amount of
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: money for me, huge amount a huge Honestly, I was
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: buying clothes. I'd buy a new clothes. I was walking
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: around dressed nice for the first time. Really that my
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: dad didn't walk around horribly dressed when I was a kid.
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: But I'm just saying for the first time, I could
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: choose my own Actually I kind of did choose my
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: own clothes, really, but most of the clothes was school uniform,
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: wasn't it not? Not at home. I need to get
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: myself some pajamas, That's what I need to do. I
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: realized that I'm looking at my clothes lately and I'm
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: just wearing the same old stuff every day. So I
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: got these dark brown tracksuit bottoms. Horace is, can you
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: Horas He's having an argument with his wife Doris. I
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: got seven pairs of these tracksuit bombs, so I wear
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: a different pair every day. And I'm pretty sure people
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: see me. They've never seen me wear anything else for years.
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: I don't know if they think I'm just wearing the
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: same thing every day. I'm like the same pair of
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: tracksuit bombs, which I'm not. There's different ones. They're just
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: all the same. So I've decided I'm gonna try and
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: get myself some clothes, a little bit of clothing every week.
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: So I'm trying to. Every time I get paid, I
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: put ten percent away saving and that's for veterinary bills
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: for him. And I'm also saving up so I can
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: go and get my eyes tested and pay for some
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: decent glasses. The eye test is free. But so anyway,
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: that's what that ten percent is for. It's basically is,
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: now I got a dog barking. Blame me. That dog
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: hardly ever used to bark before. Now it can't shut
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: up part And when it's not barking, which is most
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: of the time, most of the time, it's quiet. So
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: I don't know why I'm moaning. I do know why
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: I'm moaning because I love it. I love moaning rare.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: It's my right as an english person to moan, to
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: complain about the weather, or just talk about the weather,
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: and to just moan. That's that's why. That's my my
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: human right, and to drink lots of tea. So what
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: was it gonna say? Yeah, I'll try and be away
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: for future fat bills future things. I dentists because I
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: haven't got a dentist, So dental bills because that was
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: three hundred one. I add two have removed a couple
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: of years ago or a year and a half ago,
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: so and the other thing is for my eyes. So
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: that's those three things that I need to put that
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: away for. And now I'm going to spend a percentage
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: of workouts, a percentage more percentage of every time I
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: get paid, and contribute that towards getting some clothes, whether
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: it's a pair of socks or a pair of pants
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: underpants or a T shirt wherever, just to start getting
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: some I don't know, half decent clothes because most of
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: what I've got is worn out and old and grotti.
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: I mean, because I've got a tendency of buying cheap stuff,
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: like cheap T shirts five for a pound. No maybe not,
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: but like you know, five T shirts for twenty quid.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: They're fine to start with, but after a few washes,
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: they just they don't look great. So it's something I
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: want to try and do. Also, I need to look
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: at getting a winter coat. This is probably the best
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: time of the year to get a winter coat, really
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: because I'll be cheaper because I don't have one. I
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: can't This old thing my dad gave me probably about
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: ten years ago, probably longer actually, and it's something that
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: he used to wear on the dogs. He gave that
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: to me and I just had as a backup. But
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: then the two winter coats that I did have got mislaid,
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: so I ended up with nothing. So I've been wearing
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: that one for the last couple of years, which is okay.
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: I've got a big jumper on underneath. But I think
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: since I lost a little bit away, I feel a
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: cold a little bit more than I used to because
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: I used to be like a seal, you know, in
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: the winter. I just I had so much blubber I
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: didn't really feel the cold at all. Now I still
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: don't feel it hugely, but a little bit more so.
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: I've got a little bit less fat on me. I'm
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: still heavy enough to not be fair affected by the wind.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: That's good. That is an advantage of not being really
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: really slim and light, because I used to get blown
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: around by the wind. I used to have to wear
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: heavy boots in the libraries. Seriously. I remember once we
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: went kiting, and my dad used to love kiting and
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: we go to the top of the cliffs and oh,
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: I was a windy day. As on a windy day,
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: and because we lived near the beach, windy days a
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: very generous. There's a lot, a lot of them, and
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: we'd be flying these kites and it was great. But
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: I would actually find myself being lifted up by the kite.
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: I mean this is when I was a kid, so
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: I probably only weight I know, four stone or five
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: stone maybe, so you know, it wouldn't take a lot
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: for a four stone to be lifted off off the ground. Yeah,
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: I don't know why I start thinking of that. That
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: was quite good times actually, And my dad had a
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: friend who owned and I don't know if it's an
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: ice cream place. I think it was. It was like
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: this restaurant. I think it was like a restaurant bar,
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: but I had an ice cream bar in it, so
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: I don't think based on where I was positioned, that
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: they would make enough money just selling ice cream. So
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: it was actually a venue. So we went there and
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: we used to get some ice cream. That was a
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: long story that didn't really lead anywhere today. I could
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: have just said would go and have some ice cream.
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: I just remember it was quite a big room with
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: tables and stuff, and I think my dad used to
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: do work for the man, like electrical stuff, but it
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: was also friends with him. I think if I was
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: ever to have my time again and I had to
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: choose to say a trade, I don't really know. I
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: thought about this like, I don't think I'd want to
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: be an electrician. I don't think i'd want to be
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: a carpenter, just because I don't. I never really never
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: really I did would work at school, being never really
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: kind of yeah, I never found it interesting. There was
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: I did metal work as well, that was even less interesting.
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: I just working with metal wasn't really something that I
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: particularly looked forward to, No what. Down in junior school,
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: I used to like woodwork because it was just part
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: drafts and i'd be working with balsa wood. So what
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: I needed was a little knife, little I suppose it's
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: a whittling I think it's called, and a bit of
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: sandpaper and I would make this uh what are they called?
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: Not yachts canoes, made these little canoes and I used
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: to quite enjoy doing it. And cross stitchen as well.
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: I loved across the stitching. Oh yes, I don't know
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: what it was. I think I think it might be
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: they gave me a focus, something to really focus on.
• 48:08
  Speaker 1: It took my mind away from what I was thinking about.
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: I guess maybe, and I needed that was about nine
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: and ten when I did that, and I was I
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: felt good. I felt very relaxed when I did stop stotch,
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: critchen stotch, critching, gritch stotching, cross stitching, cross stitching. I
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: tried it. It came when I was in my twenties.
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: I can't remember what happened. I don't know why I
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: didn't stick to it, because otherwise I've been doing it
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: now night whatever. If I did do it now, i'd
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: probably use a tambourine. Okay, it's not you know that
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: round thing that you do you use or I think
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: you can. Maybe you can use like a not a
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: door frame, like a frame thing and you put the
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: material on and you can do it that way, just
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: so you can kind of see what you're doing. Mm hm. Tambourines.
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: They're like tambourines. They're around anyway. They didn't have like
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: you can shape them. You can join the orchestra or
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: a choir. Because I didn't make any noise so as
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: an accompaniment, there weren't much use but for stop stop Critchen.
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: Cross cross stitching. Why is that such a hard word
• 50:05
  Speaker 1: to say, cross stitching? Cross stitching? Blimey. I think it's
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: because I haven't said it for some while. It's not
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: a term that I've used very often in the last
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: fifty years or forty five years. But I still love it.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: I really did, really did. Just perhaps that's why I
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: need although to be honest, I find making podcasts have
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: kind of the same reaction for me. So I'm focused,
• 50:59
  Speaker 1: but not on myself. Although I'm talking about myself, I'm
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: not focused on There's nothing going on in my mind
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: other than the next word or maybe wonder why I
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: said the next word. That's a very focused, very relaxing
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: thing today. Making a recording for me because if it
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: wasn't then I wouldn't do it. Yeah, I wouldn't. I'm
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: not gonna do something I don't want to do. I've tried,
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: that's my whole life, trying to do that. But as
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: far as recordings, I have forced myself to make recordings
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: in the past and it doesn't work, I'll do it recording,
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: then I'll have to trash it. Because I realized I've
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: just been a little bit too grumpy. So I only
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: make a recording when I want to, when i'm up
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: through it and i'm feeling I mean, sometimes I do
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: one when I'm tired. Sometimes I do one because I
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: know I need to do it, but it's it's not
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: that I don't want to. I might give myself a
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: little nutch maybe on a Q and a Friday when
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: I'm thinking i've left it late. I'm gonna have to
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: do it. If I don't do it now, I'll have
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: to do it in the morning. And I think, nah,
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: I'm doing now, But it's never it's never forced. Wow,
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: my stomach just did a proper circle. That's why he
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: had breakfast cereal yesterday because I've not had any food,
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: so I need to since Monday. So I need to
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: like mak food food, you know. So I'm gonna make
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: myself a couple of toasted sandwiches once I've done this. Yeah,
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: I just needed to check something I don't know in
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: my freezer. I did have some rolls which I can
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: toast or let them defrost in the I use them
• 54:13
  Speaker 1: as roll bread rolls, basically that Gia batter geepetter the
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: geopatter or geepetter geo petty rolls, and I'll cook something
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: in the air fraro and eat them inside the rolls.
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: I don't know if I've got any left in the freezer,
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: and if I have, I'm gonna have to stick them
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: in the air fryer to defrost. Who But then I'm thinking,
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: maybe what instead is a just have some toast with
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: something inside the toast rather than chapatter rules, Because I
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: do have at least one loaf of bread in the freezer,
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: so I need to remember to eat it, because I
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: know that if I leave the bread in the freezer
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: too long, the bread just goes wrong. It's not weird
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: as you'd think, Oh, you've put in a freezer should
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: last for ages and ages it's frozen. But if it's
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: left in there too long, the results of toasting a
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: piece of bread. A slice of bread that's been in
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: a freezer too too long is not nice. Fresh toast
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: is quite nice. Fresh bread toast is also yum yum,
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: yum yum yum, depending, I think depends on what kind
• 56:09
  Speaker 1: of bread it is that was weird. There's a bread
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: called toasty that we can get right it's too big
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: to fit in the toaster long wise, it's ridiculous. So
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: it's cord toasties. You'd think that meant it's for toasting,
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: unless I've got the smallest toaster in the world. Dog
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: get a guard who was barking again. Hopefully it's stock
• 56:45
  Speaker 1: Now that dog is exactly the same as Loki. Same
• 56:52
  Speaker 1: make same. Everything really looks different, but kind of the
• 56:56
  Speaker 1: same type of dog, same marking, the same, sounds the same.
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: Wop wop wop, deep old voice. I don't know if
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: you can hear my stomach circling. I'm going to have
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: to go and eat, eat, I tell you, eat. Oh, yes,
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: I'm going to eat. Maybe it's collared some ice cream.
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: So when I when I went out with Finnie, I
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: came back had a cornetto. I gave him some some
• 57:39
  Speaker 1: of the ice cream. He kind of the cornetto has
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: got chocolate on the the crust or whatever. But this
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: is just strawberry and vanilla. So I gave him a
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: bear of the ice cream and he lapped up very quickly.
• 57:59
  Speaker 1: M hm, oh, he's just waking up. His head was
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: hanging down. I was gone back to sleep again. He
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: just he has weird dreams never down woke him up
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: because literally making those strangest sounds. This was on Monday night.
• 58:23
  Speaker 1: I don't know what he was thinking, but just spend
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: time with the neighbor who used to have him. He
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: spent about an hour and a half with her for
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: the first time since the beginning of the year. Really,
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: and I think it's it's had an emotional effect on
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: him because he adores her, absolutely adors her. He's known
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: as since he was born, since he was literally born.
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: She's one of the first people he ever saw in
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: his life. So he's got a big attachment. I'd say
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: that after two and a half years of living here
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: and sleeping in the bed with me and being with
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: me nearly all the time, he's probably got an attachment
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: to me as well. I just don't know. It seems
• 59:27
  Speaker 1: to be different with her. It's just I gave her
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: the lead and she walked off, and he went with her,
• 59:44
  Speaker 1: didn't look back, didn't care. I wasn't there. It kind
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: of I don't know. I feel that he should want
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: to stay with me in a way, but I think
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: he's happy. He's happy. He's a happy boy. He doesn't
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 1: get the stimulation the needs, I don't think. But he
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: does get out a few times a day. He sees
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: quite a few different dogs, lots of different people, he
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 1: says a lood to. It's an amazing amount of people
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: around him that know him by name, Hello, Vinny, any
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: like I don't even know who after people are. Everyone
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 1: seems to know him less sort of coke. Keep ourselves
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 1: of food, and he'd also get delivery. I forgot about that. Yeah,
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: I need to give myself delivery because running out of milk.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: I'll just see. I might have enough milk for tomorrow morning.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: I do know. We'll see, we'll see what happens, because
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 1: maybe I'll wait until tomorrow get delivery tomorrow. I've definitely
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 1: got enough milk for tea, for a few cups of tea,
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: but I don't know for the breakfast cereal. And I
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: do like to have my I do like to have
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: my ready break in the morning. And it takes up
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: nearly a bowl of milk, I tell it. Okay, yeah,
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: good boy, did you have a lovely sleep? You did,
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: didn't you? A? You? Okay, you're right, good boy. He's
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 1: laid his head down again. There's strangers when he's lying
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: on the sofa with me next to me. I can
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: have my hand on him the whole time, stroking him,
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: massaging him, just and he's fine with that. But if
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 1: we're in bed, doesn't does not put my hand on him.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: We had and it's like nowadays, showered at me. I
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: like you as a friend, like this weird thing to
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: say he needs a bath. Wow, you know, I was
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 1: literally gonna say, he doesn't even react to the word bath.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 1: But as soon as I said he needs a bath,
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 1: he looked up at me and my stomach air got again,
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 1: which means it's dim thing's time. So thank you for listening.
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: Remember to be kind to yourself because you do deserve
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: to be happy. A be gentle with yourself. You deserve
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: to feel safe. Lots of love. Four