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Finding Joy Through Gratitude with Jessica Renfeldt · The Eye Believe Podcast

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hey everyone
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welcome to the Eye Believe Podcast
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I'm Megan and today we are joined by Jessica
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the founder of Mindset Coaching by Jessica Anne
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and she is not only an international
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best selling author but an inspirational speaker
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and we're thrilled to have her here
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welcome Jessica
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hey Megan
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I'm so excited to be here
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thank you absolutely
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thank you for coming
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we are thrilled to talk about mindset and your story
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a story of surviving and thriving
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which is what we're all about
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so let's get into it
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tell us a little bit about yourself
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yeah so
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I mean I feel like I had a pretty normal childhood
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I grow up on a small farm in a community called Delta
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Utah my dad was an alfalfa farmer
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and I got all the joys of being a kid on a farm
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running free through the summer months
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and just kind of you know
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I'm Gen X so it truly was the case
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like
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I left it sun up and didn't come home till sun down
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and it felt like a really incredible life
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fast forward into my teenager years
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we moved to Las Vegas and then to California
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and I met my husband
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when I was still a senior in high school
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got married pretty young
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and started having babies a year and a half later
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so by the time I was actually 20
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I was already a mom
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which I love I love being a mom
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that's like the best thing in the world
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but going from someone's child to somebody's wife
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and then somebody's mom
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I feel like maybe my own identity got washed out
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so I did all the things that I thought
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I was supposed to do be a good mom
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I wasn't a mom that got to stay home with my kids
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but I had a really great career in pharmacy
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ended up in pharmacy benefit management
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making a really good salary
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and I led some pretty incredible people
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as a senior director of client management
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and sales
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we had a house
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we had a boat and cars and all the things
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and then tragedy struck my life in September of 2016
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after a year of going back and forth to my doctor
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because I didn't feel well
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and several misdiagnoses
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I was actually diagnosed with Cardiac AL Amyloidosis
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essentially what happens at a very high level
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is that
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our bone marrow makes proteins that go to the rest of
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our bodies it's like they're pre
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assigned to what they're supposed to do
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well my body started creating miss folded proteins
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so instead of looking like this
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they started looking like this
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and when that happens
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they get sticky and they stick together
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and then when they go to other areas of the body
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for example your organs
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they stick inside the wall of the organ
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and cause organ failure
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so for me it attacked my heart
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the worst to some extent
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my kidneys my pancreas
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my liver
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my GI system including my throat
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my esophagus my tongue
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like I was by the time I finally got a diagnosis
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really sick in fact
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the cardiologist that finally found the disease
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said that I had maybe eight weeks to live
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my congestive heart failure was so far advanced
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so
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it truly is a miracle I'm standing here just for that
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by itself
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the treatment for that is um
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really similar to multiple myeloma
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so I had to do a bone marrow transplant
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and then 10 months of outpatient chemo
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and between the two of those
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it was successful
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it killed the disease process that was creating most
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misfolded proteins
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and the thought
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or the hope that my providers had was that over time
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those proteins that had build up in my heart wall
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causing a severely stiff heart
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would eventually just kind of dissipate
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like my body would absorb them
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I'd regain function of my heart
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but it would take years
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well I did all the things I could possibly think of
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healthy eating movement on my body
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I tried to remove stress as much as possible
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however I was in a corporate job
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so that's not entirely um
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you can't entirely remove stress when you're
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you're in a corporate position
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reporting to a corporation that expects certain things
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that may not align with our own values and purpose
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but all the other things I was doing felt like
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you know if I just do all these things
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keep a really positive mindset
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I'm gonna be okay
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like I got past the hard part and then unfortunately
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I started getting sick again
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started having some congestive heart failure symptoms
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and I started to think goodness
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is this gonna be my life like
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am I just gonna have to live with these symptoms
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and not be able to climb mountains
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and do all the things that I wanna do
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and then in January of 2020
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I had a massive stroke
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and this stroke was so severe that my my providers
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the neurologists in the intensive care unit
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they just weren't even sure if I'd walk or talk again
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and I remember when my husband asked that
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while I'm laying in bed half in and out of it
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just having had a stroke several hours before
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I remember he asked you know
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is she gonna walk her talk again
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and the doctor said you know
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we're just not sure and I remember thinking
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oh no way that is not my life that is not gonna happen
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and so I was sad of course
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frustrated angry at the situation
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but I knew in my heart
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that if I were to go to that point
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and sit there you know
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sit in the sadness sit in the anger
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it wasn't gonna help me get better yes
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I felt those things
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but then I started asking myself well
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what is it that you need
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and it's when I turned inward and said well
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what is it that you need
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that I started being able to push myself forward
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out of that situation which was just within a day
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I needed to be able to get out of that bed
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and so that's the I started pestering people
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you know what I wanna sit on the side of my bed
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I wanna stand by my bed
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and eventually at about the 24 hour Mark post stroke
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PT came in they were on one side
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had a belt around me in case I did fall
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and my husband was on the other side
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and we walked around the nurses station in the neural
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ICU that day I'm not saying it was a pretty walk
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in fact my left leg kind of drugged behind me
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as my right leg did all the work
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but I was moving
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and I didn't realize how miraculous of a feat
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that was
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until I saw the nurses and the doctors on the floor
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literally dropped their jaws in amazement
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I never had to go into an extended care facility
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after that I was released to home
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just a couple days after my stroke
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and I did all the things occupational therapy
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daily movement
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um back to the nutrition
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the healthy mindset so
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you know that comes with meditation and affirmations
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and all of those things
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um but when I had my stroke
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it set off an alarm to my
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my cardiac doctors and they realize
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you know if her heart isn't pushing blood
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the way it's supposed to
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and it's pooling and causing clots
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we ought to consider
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putting her on the heart transplant list
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so the work up for
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being put on the heart transplant list
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started happening within weeks
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of being impatient with the stroke
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and who knew that that was such a big like undertaking
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that the amount of tests you have to do
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meeting with psychiatrists and nutritionists
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and a whole team of experts
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before they'll sign off and say yes
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she can handle being a heart transplant recipient
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and once I was on the list
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it took 18 months to get my heart
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15 months of those were spent as an outpatient
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and it was during Covid so
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I literally was so scared of getting sick
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because I wasn't healthy
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and so for me getting sick
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and getting Covid
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could be very detrimental to my health
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and so I became quite the hermit
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but a hermit with a really good mindset
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and just gratitude that I was there
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and then I'm just gonna have the opportunity to live
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once I had that heart
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and you know
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my mind started getting so curious
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about all the things I could do
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once I had my heart
9:43
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10:02
but in the meantime
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there were things that I couldn't do
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and so I figured out things that I could do
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other things that I was curious about
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that maybe didn't have you know
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a physicality attached to it
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so I read a lot of books
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I started just getting curious about watercolor
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painting quilting baking
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cooking love cooking for my family and for myself
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so I did things to keep me in a really high vibration
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of gratitude and joy
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I spent a lot of time with my family
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and then those friends who were really protective
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not getting or bringing illness to me
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so all things that were super important
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but as those 15 months went by
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I started getting sicker nothing having to do with
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you know how I was living
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but simply my heart was dying
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and so I went into the cardiac ICU
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for the last 78 days of my wait
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um I
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I'll paint a little bit of a picture
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you get a room which you're not allowed to leave
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unless somebody's with you
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so a provider and exercise physiologist
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or if you're going to X ray or to the cath lab
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those are the only times you get to leave
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you have wires sticking down through your throat
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you have electrodes all over your body
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they're giving you medications that make you feel
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horrible and you just sit there with your thoughts
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and I did try to work from my hospital bed
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literally up until the day I had my heart transplant
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and I was successful
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I may not have been the best employee
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I'm sure I made a few mistakes
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I wasn't getting enough blood to my brain
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but I was trying I was doing my best
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and otherwise you know
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I went back to that whole thing like
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I'm gonna make the best of this
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and so I did everything I could to really get to know
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all of my nurses and my doctors
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I find out about you know
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if they were parents if they had dogs
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what they like to do on the side
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where it was their favorite place to travel
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and I became really close with the staff
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at the hospital while I was waiting
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again we're right smack dab in the middle of covid
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so outside visitation was hard
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I was allowed to have two visitors a day
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which had to be assigned
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so if my daughter and my friend showed up that morning
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they're the only visitors I could have all day
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like you couldn't switch it out at all
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so that made it kind of hard
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so
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while I had these really wonderful relationships with
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healthcare staff I still was struggling
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and you know
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30 days turned into 60 days
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and about that 60 day mark
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I was just I was having a hard time
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and so I really had to surrender
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and in the evenings I would ask my nurse
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just for an hour of time
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where I wasn't being poked or given drugs
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or blood pressure taken or anything like that
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and I would get up on top of my bed
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and I would kind of get the wires to where I could
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kind of put them to the side
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I would get in child's pose on top of my bed
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and I put my hands in prayer position above my head
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and I think that
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that really was just about surrendering
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you know
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I know everybody has a different belief about God
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creator source
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I grew up in a very religious home where
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you know it was God and Jesus and
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and the Holy Ghost and all of that
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but as I've gotten older
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I've become much more spiritual
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and less about organized religion
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but in that time like
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I surrender to my creator
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in every way I could possibly think of
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and I would ask you know
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why am I here I've gone through so much
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and here I am waiting and it's taking so long
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you know I was losing hope
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and I had had two fault starts
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meaning they had found two hearts
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but then when they went in to harvest the organ
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they found issues with the heart
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so I didn't get them
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but they did the work up and had me excited that
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you know I was gonna
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have this heart and then it never panned out
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and so I had these UPS and downs and this grief
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like every time you lost an organ
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like it felt like I was grieving someone's death
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that's how like emotional that was
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and so in these nightly
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rituals prayer sessions
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whatever you wanna call it
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I would just completely surrender and I would listen
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and in the surrender you know
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there were some affirmations
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and maybe some meditation attached to that
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but finally one night
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clear as day I had this overwhelming feeling
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or message that I was here
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because I meant to help other people
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that's my purpose
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is to help other people get through adversity
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and so I didn't know how
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I didn't know what it looked like
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I
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I I had absolutely no clue actually
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um I didn't know
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if it was something that
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was supposed to be my livelihood
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or something that I just did on the side
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maybe I was supposed to meet with other
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um heart transplants
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or people that were waiting for heart transplants
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but I knew like leaving that hospital
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that was my purpose
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that was my greater purpose that I've been saved for
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so I started getting curious
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and I went back to my corporate job
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and didn't feel happy didn't feel fulfilled
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didn't have passion um
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and it definitely didn't match my value system
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or the vision for how I wanted my life to look
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but still I didn't have a
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clear idea what actually serving others looked like
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and in September of 2023
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there was some reorganization with leadership
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for the fifth time since I had been there
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and I had a choice to stay with a new title
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and a new salary structure
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or I could take a severance package and go
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and I was scared
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and anxious and didn't know what to do
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because in the meantime I had actually
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separated from my husband before my transplant
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and also
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he had passed away in the Easter right before that
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so it's in April of 2023 he had passed away
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so I had nobody to lean back on at all
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it was just me and I was thinking all right
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and then I just kind of got this piece
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you know if you walk away
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everything's gonna be okay
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like I got you like this is gonna be okay
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and so I left
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and I interviewed for a few jobs within the same
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pharmacy benefit management niche
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and it just wasn't feeling right like I was feeling
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I don't know it just didn't
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feel like that was the path I was supposed to take
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and I had started thinking about well
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maybe I want to write a book or maybe
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maybe I want to get up on stages
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and talk about my experience or
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and then this lady reached out to me
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a business coach and she's like
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one day she's just like Jessica
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I keep going past your name
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and I feel like I'm supposed to reach out to you
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what's going on and I had told her
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and I told her kind of what I felt like I was here for
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and she said I can help you with that
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and she helped me she made me believe
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and know that I could actually be a coach
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and be an inspirational speaker
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and then about that same time
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I came across a company um
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She Rises Studios SRS Publishers
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that was looking for female authors and
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to publish books and so I met with them
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gave them my idea about my book
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and they agreed to publish
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and so now I have a book publisher
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I'm writing a book
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and so it just all started falling into place
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and I've been incredibly blessed to be able to get
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on podcasts and grow my Instagram account
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so that I'm sharing a message of hope and resilience
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and joy and gratitude
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and I would say that my real like sweet spot or my
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my dream audience or client
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are midlife women who are feeling kind of stuck
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maybe they've been recently divorced
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or maybe they're just empty nesters now and feel like
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well
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who am I without having kids to take care of every day
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or who am I if I'm not somebody's wife
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or maybe they're just feeling unfulfilled
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maybe they still have kids at home
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and still have a husband
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but still like they've done all the things
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think they're living that American dream
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but just don't feel the joy that they know
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that they should be feeling
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and then
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I work with these women over the course of 12 weeks
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and we really
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just do a customized coaching program for them
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and work on four pillars basically
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that really just help them uncover their own passion
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and purpose in life
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and so
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I feel like I have the coolest purpose in the world
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to serve other people
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and I'm always so grateful to get up on other people
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stages
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podcast guest
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because anytime I can get the word out
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about how gratitude helps create joy
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and joy allows us to be entirely resilient
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people who can find a life full of purpose and passion
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I am so happy to be there
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that is an amazing story I love all of it
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I mean you've been through so much
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and to be able to come out on the other side
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and be an inspiration to people who
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are going through
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not even exactly what you went through
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but you went through so many things
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that
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I think anyone can relate to some aspect of your story
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no matter what their struggle is
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so that is really cool to see
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and I do wanna tell you something
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I just did an episode with a psychologist
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um Doctor Jason Freshman
21:36
and he talked a lot about mindset as well
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and he has a term called finding the magic in the muck
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and I think you found the magic in your muck
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I definitely did you know
21:48
my oncologist and I have had a lot of conversations
21:53
and he says that I've even helped him get through
21:56
you know tough times within his own life
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he's like man
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if Jessica can get through that
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with such a positive mindset
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then I can and I've actually asked him to write
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the forward of my solo book
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and
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because we've talked about how incredible mindset is
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for surviving like
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terminal illness
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and getting through tough times of life
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it's it's truly incredible
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what the mind can do when working with the body
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absolutely I completely agree
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and we've had um
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other episodes where we've kind of touched on mindset
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and the connection between the physical body
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the mental body the emotional body
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how they all work together
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because they do work together
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absolutely you're absolutely spot on with that
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that's amazing so
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tell us about where you're going now
22:49
like what's next
22:51
yeah so I wrote an
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I co authored a book an anthology
22:57
and it's called My Unforgettable
22:59
Personal Stories That Will Inspire You
23:02
which actually hit the international bestseller list on
23:05
Amazon which is super exciting
23:08
and it was a yeah
23:09
it was it was
23:10
it's been a lot of fun
23:11
it's a group of women who've gone through adversities
23:15
of all sorts and come out the other side
23:18
feeling resilient and powerful
23:20
and helping spread the word to other women
23:22
so that they also feel empowered
23:25
to get through tough times
23:27
and so I really enjoyed that
23:31
and I am finishing my solo book
23:35
I think I have two chapters left
23:36
I keep on going like I write and then I'm like oh
23:39
I should go back and add that here
23:42
because I feel like there's a missing component
23:44
but I think I just have two chapters left
23:46
I was writing in it this morning and thought okay
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we got to be getting close
23:50
so I hope to have that out by Mother's Day
23:54
and I you know
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if there's any of your listeners that
24:01
work for corporate America
24:04
and they want team building or coaching for their team
24:08
I love that um
24:10
I love getting on stages as a keynote
24:13
inspirational speaker so that's always an opportunity
24:17
but my love is working one on one with midlife women
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and just
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seeing the transformation that these women can make
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from feeling stuck to just really
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shining at the end of our coaching sessions
24:33
so yeah that's kind of where I'm at
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people can find me on my website
24:39
it's Jessica Anne with an E
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so J e s s I c a a n n e dot org
24:47
and on there
24:48
I actually have a free gift for your listeners
24:51
there's actually several they can choose from
24:54
but I think Live Life Loud
24:56
is one that probably will resonate with your listeners
24:59
the most and it's kind of my top 10
25:02
tips of just how I get through life
25:04
with a grateful heart
25:07
and goodness what else
25:10
oh and if they do sign up for that
25:12
then I will actually send out information
25:15
when my solo book does launch
25:17
if that would resonate with your audience
25:20
then they know when they can go out and buy that
25:22
on Amazon as well
25:24
yeah I think that's fantastic
25:26
everybody definitely go check out Jessica's website
25:29
and we love a freebie
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thank you so much for offering that
25:33
we will definitely check it out
25:34
and if somebody wanted to work with you
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they we know they wanted to be coached
25:40
is your your website's the best way to reach you
25:43
yep there's a contact section on the bottom of the page
25:46
that they could reach out to me
25:48
and I will make sure I engage with them that way
25:52
or they can also DM me on Instagram
25:56
and my Instagram handle is at J
25:58
Renfeldt and that's J R E N F E L D T
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and I'm on there every day
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so I check I check my DMS
26:08
but if anybody just want some like inspirational
26:11
uplifting content and not the doom
26:15
scrolling that we've been doing lately
26:17
um my Instagram account is great for that
26:20
I've got a ton of videos about self care mindset
26:25
community and family
26:28
there's all sorts of videos on there
26:30
that I've done over the past year
26:31
that I think could be beneficial to your audience
26:35
oh that's fantastic
26:36
and I will link all of those things in the show notes
26:38
so if you are following along
26:41
just click over to the show notes
26:43
and you'll be able to find all of those links
26:45
what if somebody wanted to do what you do
26:48
like they're obviously
26:49
a lot of the people watching this
26:51
are going through their own health journey
26:54
some of our diagnosis are worse than others of course
26:56
but if somebody was watching this and they're like
26:59
you know I this really resonates
27:00
I think I'd like to do this do
27:02
do you have any recommendations for them
27:05
or do you kind of
27:06
like how that one lady helped you get there
27:09
do you do that
27:11
um I would be more than happy to help
27:13
I've definitely learned a ton on my own journey
27:18
and would be more than happy to help with that
27:21
also I think what's really important is community
27:24
so talk to people tell people what you're doing
27:27
and you would be so surprised
27:30
how many opportunities you're gonna get to talk to on
27:33
and be a guest on somebody's podcast
27:35
or getting on a small stage
27:37
and once that snowball is like rolling
27:40
it just kind of blows up but
27:43
it's really about putting things out in the universe
27:46
I'm I'm a total believer in that
27:49
and once you do things just start showing up
27:51
but I would be more than happy to help
27:54
anybody who's looking to do what I do
27:57
kind of point them in the right direction
27:59
oh that's amazing
28:01
I love it so Jessica
28:03
if someone's watching right now and they just are like
28:06
you know I'm overwhelmed
28:07
but I think I could add one change
28:09
what is one thing they could do today
28:11
that they might start to see a benefit from
28:14
oh goodness that's easy and exciting and so simple
28:18
like I know that all of your audience has heard
28:22
how important it is to have a gratitude practice
28:25
and on and off throughout the years
28:27
I started and stopped started and stopped
28:30
and I am sad that I stopped so many times
28:34
because I will tell you
28:37
that the benefit of a gratitude practice is just
28:42
it's huge and it's simple
28:45
all I want your audience to do is get a journal
28:49
like a 99 cent journal at the dollar store
28:51
it doesn't have to be anything fancy
28:54
but I want it to be dedicated just to collecting
28:58
your gratitudes every day
29:00
and in the beginning I just want you to
29:02
find three things that you're grateful for
29:05
and for me it was really simple stuff
29:08
the smell of coffee
29:10
a smile from a stranger in the grocery store
29:14
but it's what I found is
29:15
when you raise your vibration in gratitude
29:19
like it opens you up to joy
29:22
and like I said
29:23
I feel like joy is the whole purpose we're on the earth
29:27
and as long as we have that joy in our lives
29:31
we are such resilient individuals
29:34
but you have to cultivate these things
29:37
you just can't think that they're gonna happen
29:40
that you're just gonna feel joyful
29:41
you have to cultivate it with gratitude
29:45
and it's as simple as
29:46
gratitude plus joy equals resilience
29:50
I love it so much that's such a great way to look at it
29:53
and I also think that the more you look for stuff
29:57
the more you see what you're looking for like
29:58
you know we've all heard if you look for a red car
30:01
then all of a sudden you see red cars everywhere
30:03
cause our brain is looking for what we've told it to look for
30:05
so when you start to focus on what you're grateful for
30:08
then you start to see more things you're grateful for
30:11
and you're right little things like a hot shower
30:15
that you can get the exact temperature you want
30:17
some days that's like
30:19
I'm more grateful for that than anything else I know
30:22
right because some days that's all we have time for
30:24
and sometimes we don't even have time for that
30:26
so when we do get it it's amazing
30:30
it's like
30:31
it's beautiful and it's perfect in that moment
30:34
and I think that no matter how dark times are
30:38
as long as
30:39
you can find little things to be grateful for
30:42
it will get you through tough times
30:45
absolutely I completely agree
30:47
alright well
30:48
is there anything else you'd like to say
30:49
before we wrap up
30:51
I don't think so
30:52
but thank you so much for this opportunity Megan
30:55
I really do hope that it resonates with your audience
30:58
and that I can instill some hope for them
31:02
well and hope is what it's all about
31:04
so we are thrilled to have you
31:06
thank you so much for your time and being here
31:09
and to everyone who's watching
31:10
thank you for tuning in
31:11
because we cannot do this podcast without you
31:14
your viewership is what funds our podcast
31:17
through all of our sponsors
31:19
and that goes right into my next point
31:20
thank you to all of our sponsors
31:22
our sponsors are amazing they are what make it
31:26
possibility to make this podcast for you
31:29
so by viewing
31:30
you bring the sponsors and thank you to the sponsors
31:32
so that keeps us up and running
31:34
so that we can bring you great content
31:36
like Jessica
31:37
so if you would like to also help support us
31:40
you can subscribe if you're on YouTube
31:43
you can watch the video version
31:44
please subscribe if you are listening
31:47
you can find us on um Apple Spotify
31:51
Podbean anywhere you get a podcast again
31:53
please subscribe it really does help
31:56
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31:57
you can find us on pretty much all the platforms
32:00
if you find one we're not on
32:01
please let me know cause I think we're on them all
32:04
and yeah I guess we'll just wrap up there everyone
32:07
we are thrilled to bring you another great episode
32:10
and thrilled that you were here to watch it
32:12
so we'll see you next time