Latest / Divas That Care Network / A Motherhood Journey
Transcript
- 0:00SPEAKER_00: It's Divas That Care Radio.
- 0:02SPEAKER_00: Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change.
- 0:06SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone.
- 0:13SPEAKER_00: This is a global movement for women, by women, engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations.
- 0:21SPEAKER_00: To find out more about the movement, visit DivasThatCare.com after the show.
- 0:25SPEAKER_00: Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration.
- 0:30SPEAKER_01: One just has to pick up a magazine or turn on a television to see that as women, we are bombarded daily with media images of female physical perfection setting up the most unrealistic of expectations as to how we should look.
- 0:47SPEAKER_01: No wonder female body confidence is falling while incidents of eating disorders are on the rise.
- 0:53SPEAKER_01: What's most alarming is the way this affects young girls.
- 0:57SPEAKER_01: A reduced sense of self-worth can create anxiety, stress, even depression, causing relationship issues while potentially impairing academic and job performance.
- 1:08SPEAKER_01: In direct contrast, my podcast, Confidence in Bloom, is designed to reinforce the truth and reassure every woman who has ever felt inadequate, unworthy, or tossed aside because of how she looks that no matter her age, shape, or background, you matter, you are enough now.
- 1:27SPEAKER_01: I, Tina Spoletini, a woman of substance, insist women deserve to be happy, confident, successful, and totally in love with themselves in their own bodies just the way they are.
- 1:39SPEAKER_01: Through an ongoing series of intriguing conversations with women from all walks of life who are all extraordinary in their own right, we will embark upon a journey of ultimate self-acceptance and empowerment.
- 1:51SPEAKER_01: Together we'll share the stories, laugh, learn, maybe even shed a few tears when it becomes clear just how far many women have come to realize how wonderful life is when you stand in your own power, feeling fantastic in your own skin.
- 2:07SPEAKER_01: Tricia Nicholas is my guest today.
- 2:10SPEAKER_01: A few years ago, Tricia started homeschooling her kids, and it has been the most amazing, heart-opening journey.
- 2:17SPEAKER_01: She wants to empower moms by sharing her truth, the good and the bad, the nitty-gritty and the lovey-dovey.
- 2:24SPEAKER_01: She wants moms to know that they are not alone and that they deserve support.
- 2:29SPEAKER_01: She lives in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, wife to Frank and mom to Izzy, Ava and Zach.
- 2:38SPEAKER_01: Welcome, Tricia.
- 2:41SPEAKER_01: Hi, thank you.
- 2:42SPEAKER_01: I'm so happy to be here.
- 2:44SPEAKER_01: Yes, I am so excited to hear more about your story.
- 2:49SPEAKER_01: Now, homeschooling is a story on its own.
- 2:52SPEAKER_01: I mean, I did toss the idea around with my own kids, but the reality was I knew I didn't have the strength.
- 3:00SPEAKER_01: Let's start there.
- 3:01SPEAKER_01: How does homeschooling affect you and your life?
- 3:09SPEAKER_02: That's a great question.
- 3:10SPEAKER_02: And I loved your intro talking about how kind of like society portrays how women are supposed to be versus how we actually are, right?
- 3:18SPEAKER_02: And that's my whole purpose is to empower women to know that if they want to, they can homeschool.
- 3:29SPEAKER_02: Obviously, it's not something that is right for every family or every kid.
- 3:33SPEAKER_02: But through my journey, I've met so many moms One of the first things they say is, oh, I could never do that, you know.
- 3:42SPEAKER_02: But honestly, I'm not a teacher, and I have no qualifications to be someone who would be educating their own kids.
- 3:51SPEAKER_02: And so what I've learned is you don't have to, you know, have anything official to say that you can do this.
- 3:59SPEAKER_02: It's just your innate ability as a mom to connect with your kids, to realize what they need, to facilitate communication, You know, maybe you have someone else teach them this subject, and they learn this subject with you, and it's this great mix that you can do.
- 4:17SPEAKER_02: But I think as moms, right from the beginning, a lot of us have been disempowered to not listen to our gut and our instincts, but to listen to what everyone else is saying, starting with, you know, having our babies and, you You know, we kind of give our power over to the doctors for the birth and the aftercare.
- 4:37SPEAKER_02: We just do what they say.
- 4:39SPEAKER_02: We don't really tune into ourselves.
- 4:41SPEAKER_02: And that's nobody's fault.
- 4:43SPEAKER_02: It's just kind of how it is nowadays.
- 4:47SPEAKER_01: It's true, right?
- 4:48SPEAKER_01: Like, I like how you said that.
- 4:50SPEAKER_01: Like, we've been disempowered to not listen to our own instincts.
- 4:57SPEAKER_02: Right.
- 4:57SPEAKER_02: And so, I mean, me, I definitely...
- 5:02SPEAKER_02: pushed my kids away for a long time.
- 5:05SPEAKER_02: I put them in daycare and aftercare, even after the school hours to just keep working and striving for, I didn't even know what, I just thought that's what I was supposed to do and that's what they were supposed to do.
- 5:20SPEAKER_02: And I didn't really know them to be completely honest.
- 5:26SPEAKER_02: And through this journey of learning more about them, that helped me learn more about me and I feel like a more confident, connected mom.
- 5:38SPEAKER_01: I love that.
- 5:40SPEAKER_01: I think, I mean, homeschooling and being a stay-at-home mom, I think they're two different things.
- 5:46SPEAKER_01: I don't know a lot of moms that, you know, homeschool their kids, but I think the way that the world has changed just in the last four years, I can see how homeschooling would be a lot more beneficial, right?
- 6:02SPEAKER_01: I think your kids are going to learn from you when you make that bond, right?
- 6:08SPEAKER_01: They know that when mom says, right?
- 6:11SPEAKER_01: And you'll be able to say this yourself just because you're living it.
- 6:16SPEAKER_01: And I only know because of how I know my kids, but they know when you mean business.
- 6:22SPEAKER_01: right?
- 6:22SPEAKER_01: And so when you say, okay, it's school time or we're going to go for this experience or whatever it is, they know then that, okay, now's the time for me to pay attention.
- 6:33SPEAKER_02: Oh, sure.
- 6:34SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's definitely a relationship that you build.
- 6:39SPEAKER_02: And I started homeschooling because of COVID regulations at the schools and how I felt like they were affecting my kids and That's how I even learned homeschooling.
- 6:50SPEAKER_02: Well, I knew about homeschooling, but I never thought of it.
- 6:52SPEAKER_02: In my head, homeschooling was, you know, you do school at home.
- 6:56SPEAKER_02: You just take a room in your house and this is your school room and you sit in there for eight hours and you do school.
- 7:01SPEAKER_02: That's what I thought it was.
- 7:03SPEAKER_02: So I've learned that it's not that at all.
- 7:05SPEAKER_02: But even after the COVID regulations were lifted, why I continued was, well, I was in the unique position that I didn't have a full-time job.
- 7:18SPEAKER_02: So I'm also a photographer.
- 7:20SPEAKER_02: So I do my work on the weekends and kind of freelance.
- 7:23SPEAKER_02: So I have that luxury.
- 7:25SPEAKER_02: And then I thought, well, You know, I want my kids to be able to go outside when they want to.
- 7:33SPEAKER_02: I want them to be able to sleep and rest, you know, when they want to.
- 7:37SPEAKER_02: Eat when they want to.
- 7:39SPEAKER_02: More, you know, not all the time.
- 7:42SPEAKER_02: Obviously, every day is different, but just have more agency over their life of, you know, what...
- 7:49SPEAKER_02: What do I feel like?
- 7:50SPEAKER_02: And I want to teach them to listen to their intuition and their heart instead of so much of the outside world.
- 7:56SPEAKER_02: So, you know, what do they need today?
- 7:58SPEAKER_02: And it's amazing how well kids will actually self-regulate without, you know, me imposing too many rules and restrictions on them.
- 8:12SPEAKER_02: So that's something I've had to– homeschooling is actually– taught me, I've had to unlearn my programming from school and from just how I thought I was supposed to be a mother.
- 8:23SPEAKER_02: And I thought I was supposed to crack down on them and make, you know, rigid schedules.
- 8:29SPEAKER_02: And my kids have kind of taught me, like, no, we do better with kind of a looser hand.
- 8:34SPEAKER_02: So that's been really interesting to observe over the past few years.
- 8:40SPEAKER_01: Oh, I love that.
- 8:41SPEAKER_01: So do you think– okay, so– Let me see how I want to ask this question.
- 8:47SPEAKER_01: Do you think that sort of the inner child in you as Tricia comes out then when your kids are on their way learning?
- 8:57SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
- 8:58SPEAKER_01: Do you find that it's easier?
- 9:00SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like you can be sort of a kid with them and almost relearn what you're learning or what your kids are learning.
- 9:08SPEAKER_02: Yeah, definitely.
- 9:10SPEAKER_02: And it brings a lot of joy and a lot of understanding and compassion for kids.
- 9:15SPEAKER_02: Actually, you know, kids can be mean to each other.
- 9:18SPEAKER_02: We go to homeschool centers and we go to meet up.
- 9:20SPEAKER_02: Kids interact all the time.
- 9:22SPEAKER_02: And, you know, that's what they're supposed to do.
- 9:25SPEAKER_02: They're supposed to go have back and forth, you know, conversations with other kids and learn each other's boundaries and how to communicate, you know, and get pushback and all that stuff.
- 9:37SPEAKER_02: But you know, sometimes I'm like, oh, my, you know, no wonder, you know, sometimes kids come home and they're in a bad mood and, you know, they can't even articulate what happened.
- 9:50SPEAKER_02: So sometimes as a parent, I remember when my kids were in school, they'd come home and be all stormy and emotional, and I didn't even know why, you know, but now seeing how kids interact, it's like probably something happened and, you know, they're just processing it and, you know, So that's been really interesting to watch.
- 10:09SPEAKER_02: And also some of my inner child wounding comes up and it's like, oh, wow, you know, just having these realizations of like, oh, that's why I have this behavior, you know, because, you know, I had this happen to me as a child too.
- 10:25SPEAKER_02: And now I'm remembering that because I see it happen to my own
- 10:29SPEAKER_01: child.
- 10:29SPEAKER_01: Oh, so yeah.
- 10:30SPEAKER_01: So it brings up a lot of the stuff that you went through in the regular school system.
- 10:36SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh, absolutely, yeah.
- 10:38SPEAKER_02: It's so interesting, yeah.
- 10:42SPEAKER_01: So how old, okay, so you've got three kids.
- 10:45SPEAKER_01: Izzy is the oldest, am I right?
- 10:48SPEAKER_01: Yep, she's 13, yep.
- 10:49SPEAKER_01: She's 13.
- 10:50SPEAKER_01: So she was, what, nine when she left the regular school system?
- 10:55SPEAKER_02: She was 10.
- 10:58SPEAKER_02: She went up to fourth grade.
- 11:00SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 11:01SPEAKER_01: Okay, and so what have you noticed with her?
- 11:04SPEAKER_01: Like, I mean, four years is a long time in school.
- 11:07SPEAKER_01: What have you, like, have you noticed, like, do you have, like, the biggest difference between, you know, like, today and four or five years ago?
- 11:17SPEAKER_01: Yes.
- 11:19SPEAKER_01: And the way she learns, the way she, yeah.
- 11:22SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I will tell you that, but I do want to tell you a story about her as a preschooler because she, Looking back, I could have predicted that this may be the way we would have gone.
- 11:32SPEAKER_02: But when she was in pre-K, so she was about five, she decided she did not want to be in the end-of-the-year little graduation preschool program.
- 11:44SPEAKER_02: And she told me adamantly that day, I do not want to be in it, Mom.
- 11:48SPEAKER_02: And meanwhile, every day I would drop her off at preschool, pick her up a few hours later, ask her about her day, and she would say, I don't remember, I don't remember.
- 11:58SPEAKER_02: You know, who did you sit with at snack?
- 12:00SPEAKER_02: I don't remember, Mom.
- 12:02SPEAKER_02: What did you learn?
- 12:03SPEAKER_02: Did you sing any songs?
- 12:04SPEAKER_02: I don't remember.
- 12:05SPEAKER_02: And finally she says, well, if you want to know, just stay.
- 12:08SPEAKER_02: Because she would always ask me to stay.
- 12:10SPEAKER_02: Why did you have to leave?
- 12:12SPEAKER_02: But anyways, she didn't want to be in that last program.
- 12:16SPEAKER_02: And I said, you know what?
- 12:17SPEAKER_02: You don't have to.
- 12:18SPEAKER_02: If you really don't want to, honey, you do not have to get up on the stage and do all that.
- 12:23SPEAKER_02: So she was expressing to me that she did not want to.
- 12:26SPEAKER_02: So I'll never forget.
- 12:28SPEAKER_02: I told the teacher when I picked her up, I said, she's telling me she doesn't want to come tonight to the ceremony, so I'm not going to make her.
- 12:34SPEAKER_02: The teacher followed me out to the parking lot, and she was shaming me, saying, like, I can't believe you're going to let this five-year-old make this decision.
- 12:42SPEAKER_02: And I said, you know what?
- 12:44SPEAKER_02: Yes, I am, because...
- 12:46SPEAKER_02: She doesn't want to.
- 12:46SPEAKER_02: She's five, but she knows that she doesn't want to do this.
- 12:49SPEAKER_02: I'm not going to drag her here for a preschool certificate, you know?
- 12:53SPEAKER_02: I'm like, it's fine.
- 12:55SPEAKER_02: And so that was the beginning of me really wanting her to be able to express herself and follow her heart, you know?
- 13:02SPEAKER_02: But back to your question of what I have noticed, because one of the most deciding factors in me taking them out of school was the significant change I saw in Izzy of her It was just that one year of 2020 to 2021 where they were using face masks and they were having social distance and all that stuff.
- 13:22SPEAKER_02: And she also went to a new school that year.
- 13:24SPEAKER_02: So that was like a compounded problem.
- 13:27SPEAKER_02: But my kid went from...
- 13:30SPEAKER_02: The kid who talked to everybody, who was so social, so open, she would talk to any adult she met.
- 13:36SPEAKER_02: She would just be very forward and introduce herself and talk to people.
- 13:41SPEAKER_02: She went to being so socially anxious that when I took her to a...
- 13:46SPEAKER_02: She wanted to learn to play the harp, and I took her to the harp lesson.
- 13:51SPEAKER_02: She...
- 13:52SPEAKER_02: And we all had masks on because that's just what we're used to.
- 13:54SPEAKER_02: We walked into the music place.
- 13:56SPEAKER_02: We all had masks on.
- 13:57SPEAKER_02: She was, like, she would not look anybody in the eye.
- 14:00SPEAKER_02: She was just staring at her feet.
- 14:02SPEAKER_02: And the music teacher said, honey, you can take your mask off.
- 14:05SPEAKER_02: It's okay.
- 14:06SPEAKER_02: You don't have to wear it here.
- 14:07SPEAKER_02: And she did, but then she started biting her nails.
- 14:10SPEAKER_02: And, like, these are behaviors I've never seen in her, like, staring at the ground, avoiding eye contact, biting her nails.
- 14:15SPEAKER_02: I was like, where did my child go?
- 14:17SPEAKER_02: She's not usually like this with adults, like, And then I thought, I wonder if it has to do with all this, you know, regulations.
- 14:26SPEAKER_02: And so that was me thinking, like, okay, time for something different.
- 14:31SPEAKER_02: My kid's being affected by this.
- 14:32SPEAKER_02: And so that's why we did that.
- 14:34SPEAKER_02: And, yes, over the past years of homeschooling, she's completely blossomed into an entirely different child.
- 14:41SPEAKER_02: When we first started homeschooling, she would, like, have a meltdown any time I asked her to do– any kind of worksheet or anything that reminded her of school, she would start crying and say, I can't, I just can't, you know, and especially writing.
- 14:56SPEAKER_02: And so we just kind of, I just laid off.
- 14:58SPEAKER_02: I was like, okay, I'm not going to make you do this.
- 15:02SPEAKER_02: But wouldn't you know, after a couple of years, she just started doing it on her own.
- 15:07SPEAKER_02: And this year she's written two books.
- 15:10SPEAKER_02: I can't stop.
- 15:11SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 15:12SPEAKER_02: So it's been a huge, enormous turnaround, yeah.
- 15:18SPEAKER_01: So I can relate.
- 15:20SPEAKER_01: I actually almost teared up when you were saying about how she became so, like, socially distant because, I mean, my son is going through very similar, but I didn't take him out of school.
- 15:33SPEAKER_01: He basically quit school.
- 15:35SPEAKER_01: He couldn't do it.
- 15:36SPEAKER_01: He just, you know, being around people just really bothered him.
- 15:39SPEAKER_01: And, you know, looking back, I wish I would have been more, you know, more like you where homeschool was an option.
- 15:47SPEAKER_01: But he was in high school and I kind of felt like, you know, as a teenager, he doesn't need to spend that much time with his mother, right?
- 15:55SPEAKER_01: Like I thought I would consider him more.
- 15:57SPEAKER_01: And so, you know, I just, I want to give you like the biggest hug right now for taking charge of what your daughter was going through.
- 16:05SPEAKER_01: And so your youngest must have been, you know, she must be like, she must have been just starting school at that time.
- 16:14SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 16:15SPEAKER_02: So she was in kindergarten.
- 16:17SPEAKER_02: Oh, I'm sorry.
- 16:17SPEAKER_02: No, my middle was in kindergarten and my youngest, he was only about three.
- 16:22SPEAKER_02: So he had only been to like a couple of preschool classes, like not too many.
- 16:26SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 16:27SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 16:28SPEAKER_01: And so he doesn't really have any experience in the old fashioned school system.
- 16:33SPEAKER_01: No.
- 16:36SPEAKER_01: And so now you really have nothing to compare to, but do you notice that?
- 16:41SPEAKER_01: Like the difference between your older two starting like kindergarten and up in the regular school system and how he is reacting.
- 16:51SPEAKER_01: Boys are totally different, so it's a really hard comparison.
- 16:55SPEAKER_01: But I'm just curious to know if he's more open to, because it sounds like you do a lot of play in order to teach them.
- 17:05SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we do a lot of play and a lot of, it's basically, what we do is called unschooling.
- 17:10SPEAKER_02: We mostly do unschooling, which is learning through experiences.
- 17:12SPEAKER_02: So we're doing a lot of field trips.
- 17:16SPEAKER_02: But it's funny because even my middle child, who did go to kindergarten, she still has a completely different attitude towards learning than my oldest.
- 17:27SPEAKER_02: And my youngest, yeah, it's just totally different.
- 17:30SPEAKER_02: But the biggest thing I've noticed is You know, my oldest, she still has that, like, program of she needs someone's approval and she needs permission, you know, and that, I believe, comes from school.
- 17:45SPEAKER_02: She needs somebody to tell her.
- 17:46SPEAKER_02: She needs that validation.
- 17:48SPEAKER_02: Like, am I doing this right?
- 17:51SPEAKER_02: She wants to almost, like, turn something in to, like, get approval.
- 17:55SPEAKER_02: approve like okay I've turned this in and somebody said I did a good job like she still has that in her now the other two do not at all and sometimes it really bothers me and my oldest because we don't understand like how they do not care what other people think and I'm sure some of it has to do with personality and I'm a first born and then I know that's part of that too and you know obviously my first born but sometimes we're just like oh my gosh they just do not care and it's good and I say you know I tell my oldest That's where we're headed to, but we're just taking longer to deprogram
- 18:31SPEAKER_01: ourselves.
- 18:32SPEAKER_01: Well, and the thing is, I mean, you have to, like, it's going to be more difficult for you because now you have to, like, unlearn what you've lived all your life, right?
- 18:45SPEAKER_01: And she's only got a partial training in that, right?
- 18:48SPEAKER_01: And so I could see that.
- 18:51SPEAKER_01: So, I mean, obviously, the way I'm looking at this is if we could train all the kids today to be like your two younger kids where they're, not that they don't care, but where it is what it is, right?
- 19:07SPEAKER_01: I mean, I learned this.
- 19:08SPEAKER_01: This is what I got from it.
- 19:09SPEAKER_01: And this is what I'm going to do with it, right?
- 19:11SPEAKER_01: That's what we need to all be like, right?
- 19:14SPEAKER_01: I mean, there's still always going to be rules to follow.
- 19:17SPEAKER_01: It's not like we're saying, you know, like, you don't have to care about that person.
- 19:21SPEAKER_01: or those rules or anything like that.
- 19:24SPEAKER_01: It's just a matter of, you know, I'm learning this way, and this is what I'm going to do with what I've learned.
- 19:30SPEAKER_01: Whereas, like, you and your daughter and myself, because I went to, you know, regular-style school, we're always wanting, you know, like you said, validation and approval of what we want to do, right?
- 19:45SPEAKER_01: And so...
- 19:46SPEAKER_01: How do you handle that with your daughter?
- 19:49SPEAKER_01: I would love to know that.
- 19:50SPEAKER_01: I want to, you know, maybe learn some of that for myself.
- 19:53SPEAKER_01: How do we, like, you know, accept that we can just do it the way it is and it's okay?
- 20:02SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's a practice.
- 20:04SPEAKER_02: It really is.
- 20:05SPEAKER_02: It's something we're practicing all the time, just...
- 20:10SPEAKER_02: You know, we found a lot of comfort in our community.
- 20:13SPEAKER_02: We found a homeschool center, and I think that helps us a lot because when we talk about what we're doing with others and we see, oh, wow, you know, everyone's doing something so different and unique, you know, we don't have to really compare ourselves so we can know if it feels good for us.
- 20:32SPEAKER_02: And so we're kind of learning to build that muscle of, like, does this feel good for us so we feel satisfied in what we're doing, you know?
- 20:40SPEAKER_02: But yeah, we're definitely still practicing that.
- 20:44SPEAKER_01: Well, and the thing is, I mean, Well, you went through regular school just like I did, and we know one year from the other are different, right?
- 20:52SPEAKER_01: It depends on your teacher, you know, who's in your classroom with you, and, you know, their reactions to what you're doing.
- 21:00SPEAKER_01: And so, you know, it's going to be different all the time.
- 21:04SPEAKER_01: And then, of course, now your daughter is heading into her teenage years.
- 21:08SPEAKER_01: And, I mean, we know what that's like for us girls.
- 21:10SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's not easy.
- 21:12SPEAKER_01: I mean, boys suffer with, you know, similar, you know, hormone changes, of course, as well.
- 21:17SPEAKER_01: But I think girls seem to take it on a lot more personal, and it affects them a little bit differently, right?
- 21:24SPEAKER_01: So, I mean, that all comes into effect.
- 21:27SPEAKER_01: But the fact that they have you, their mom, there, right?
- 21:32UNKNOWN: Yeah.
- 21:32SPEAKER_01: I mean, she doesn't have to worry about other adults trying to, you know, impress on her different ideas.
- 21:41SPEAKER_01: She can come to mom and probably, like, if you have sisters and your mom, I mean, you can get from them.
- 21:49SPEAKER_01: Like, she'll be able to go to them and have the same kind of answers.
- 21:54SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 21:55SPEAKER_02: One of the most valuable things has been the conversations in the car, honestly, like to and from activities.
- 22:02UNKNOWN: Yeah.
- 22:02SPEAKER_02: And me being there to pretty much witness what's happening.
- 22:09SPEAKER_02: So if they have, especially like you said, my 13-year-old, she's coming into the teen years.
- 22:13SPEAKER_02: There's all kinds of new topics to navigate with peers.
- 22:19SPEAKER_02: And they do have interactions with other parents at these homeschool centers.
- 22:24SPEAKER_02: Like another parent will be teaching a class.
- 22:26SPEAKER_02: And so she's learning from a variety of people But I know, you know, basically, I know basically what's going on, who she's talking to.
- 22:36SPEAKER_02: And so then when we are driving home, often we'll have a really good conversation about someone's bed or how she's feeling.
- 22:46SPEAKER_02: You know, she's navigating, like, having romantic feelings for different, you know, boys at the center and, you know, all kinds of stuff.
- 22:54SPEAKER_02: But I'm so lucky to be able to just be there, like, be a founding board for her and, you And just be a witness and be like, okay, yeah, I see what you mean.
- 23:03SPEAKER_02: And she can feel that connection.
- 23:05SPEAKER_02: Like I really know what she means and I really know where she's coming from.
- 23:09SPEAKER_02: So I think that has built a lot of trust.
- 23:11SPEAKER_02: I'm hoping that carries us through the teen years a bit.
- 23:15SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, yeah, me too.
- 23:17SPEAKER_01: I hope that for you, too, because it's a tough time, right?
- 23:21SPEAKER_01: I mean, we all went through it, right?
- 23:24SPEAKER_01: And today there's so much more adding to that with social media and all that stuff.
- 23:29SPEAKER_01: Now, I have a question about that whole social media thing.
- 23:33SPEAKER_01: I mean, that's a parenting thing.
- 23:36SPEAKER_01: It's not a school thing.
- 23:38SPEAKER_01: So do your kids have, like, you know, iPads or tablets and phones?
- 23:45SPEAKER_01: Like...
- 23:46SPEAKER_01: That's a parenting rule.
- 23:47SPEAKER_01: That's not a school rule.
- 23:48SPEAKER_01: So do you allow that kind of interaction with them?
- 23:52SPEAKER_02: Yes.
- 23:53SPEAKER_02: They have tablets, and my oldest has a flip phone.
- 23:56SPEAKER_02: So we haven't got her a smart phone yet, but she does have a flip phone so she can call us or text us if she needs to.
- 24:05SPEAKER_02: Because she's at the age also where sometimes she'll choose to stay home when we go do something, and so I want to be able to communicate with her.
- 24:13SPEAKER_02: Right.
- 24:14SPEAKER_02: But, yeah, they do go on their tablets.
- 24:16SPEAKER_02: It's so interesting because a lot of these things like Minecraft, Roblox, I don't know if you're familiar with those, but you can weave so much learning into those.
- 24:28SPEAKER_02: So that's kind of mind-blowing.
- 24:30SPEAKER_02: Like my youngest, like he is so motivated to learn to read so that he can understand the Minecraft instructions.
- 24:39SPEAKER_02: Oh, but whatever's going to do it.
- 24:41UNKNOWN: Yeah.
- 24:42SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, so they do.
- 24:43SPEAKER_02: They have a nice mix, though, of, you know, going outside and being active, and then they do really enjoy playing video games as well and going on their tablets.
- 24:55SPEAKER_02: But the social part, the younger two aren't on– they do have Facebook Messenger, so they can message their friends, but they don't have– you know, they can't scroll through any social media, and the 13-year-old can't either.
- 25:07SPEAKER_02: None of them are– I don't know what age we're going to allow them to do that because that's a whole new level.
- 25:17SPEAKER_02: Yeah,
- 25:19SPEAKER_01: and that's a parenting decision, right?
- 25:24SPEAKER_01: I mean, the schools can't.
- 25:26SPEAKER_01: you know, enforce, you know, one way or the other, right?
- 25:31SPEAKER_01: But at the same time, because you have them at home, you know, you have more control that way.
- 25:38SPEAKER_01: When they're going to the school environment, you know, they're coming home and they're saying, but everybody else has it, right?
- 25:45SPEAKER_02: And
- 25:46SPEAKER_01: not that you have to give in as a parent because we didn't.
- 25:49SPEAKER_01: Like my husband and I were really, you know, we were really tough on that with our first two.
- 25:54SPEAKER_01: With the second or the third one, And he was like, I don't know, he just seemed to, you know, be so much more independent.
- 26:01SPEAKER_01: But I see the difference now.
- 26:03SPEAKER_01: Like, after COVID, he really, it took him back, right?
- 26:08SPEAKER_01: And that was COVID.
- 26:10SPEAKER_01: That wasn't social media.
- 26:12SPEAKER_01: But a lot of what is going through him now, I wish I would have, you know, held back on the, you know, allowing the phone and the tablet and all that stuff.
- 26:22SPEAKER_01: So that's one thing.
- 26:23UNKNOWN: Yeah.
- 26:25SPEAKER_01: That's one thing with homeschooling.
- 26:26SPEAKER_01: Like, had I done that with my kids, which at the time, there was, like, no way.
- 26:32SPEAKER_01: I don't know if I would have had the patience.
- 26:34SPEAKER_01: I had twins.
- 26:35SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
- 26:36SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's through ignorance, too, right?
- 26:39SPEAKER_01: I thought that there was a lot more involved than there is.
- 26:43SPEAKER_01: You know, over the years, I have learned just through small conversations that, you You know, any mom can do it because, you know, like you said, you're learning through experiences.
- 26:53SPEAKER_01: And actually, it's probably really good because it's really more social than it is not.
- 27:00SPEAKER_01: Am I
- 27:01SPEAKER_02: right?
- 27:01SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 27:01SPEAKER_02: You're right.
- 27:02SPEAKER_02: And I was going to say that was your youngest that was going on social media.
- 27:07SPEAKER_02: Because I'm telling you, with the youngest, it's like they do everything quicker than the oldest because the other ones are doing it.
- 27:14SPEAKER_02: So, of course, they're going to do it, you know.
- 27:16SPEAKER_02: Oh, exactly.
- 27:17SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 27:18SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 27:19SPEAKER_02: He was so quick.
- 27:21UNKNOWN: Yeah.
- 27:21SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 27:22SPEAKER_01: Well, I really love that.
- 27:23SPEAKER_01: I really love, I mean, I don't know, like, okay, we talked mostly about your kids, right?
- 27:29SPEAKER_01: I really want to know, like, how we can empower moms and dads.
- 27:34SPEAKER_01: I mean, really, I mean, it's a parenting thing.
- 27:37SPEAKER_01: It's, you know, you can't do anything alone.
- 27:39SPEAKER_01: How do you empower other moms that, you know, are contemplating homeschooling or regular schooling?
- 27:46SPEAKER_01: How do you tell them or how do you try to, you know, explain to them the benefits And you're, like, for you as well as for your kids.
- 27:57SPEAKER_02: Sure.
- 27:58SPEAKER_02: Well, you know, I wanted to tell you, as well as any other moms listening, you know, regular schooling is totally fine, too.
- 28:06SPEAKER_02: And I always say, you know, there's good and bad things both ways.
- 28:11SPEAKER_02: And, yeah.
- 28:13SPEAKER_02: And my basic message is helping moms to listen to their heart.
- 28:18SPEAKER_02: And sometimes going to school is the right thing for the whole family, for your kids.
- 28:22SPEAKER_02: So definitely there's no right or wrong way to go.
- 28:26SPEAKER_02: But if you do want to homeschool, there's just so many resources and there's so many ways to do it.
- 28:36SPEAKER_02: So definitely explore all the different ways to do homeschooling because you can You can purchase a curriculum or you can even ask for the curriculum that your local public school uses and they'll send you everything.
- 28:50SPEAKER_02: And then so you can just go step by step and go through that.
- 28:54SPEAKER_02: Or you can do unschooling like we do and learn through experiences.
- 28:58SPEAKER_02: And there's all different ways in between as well.
- 29:04SPEAKER_02: There's online classes they could take.
- 29:06SPEAKER_02: So if you feel like math is, you know, like me personally, I could never teach math.
- 29:11SPEAKER_02: So I'm definitely outsourcing that, you know, so there's online, they can just take a math class, you know, they can.
- 29:18SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 29:18SPEAKER_02: So there's so many different ways to do it, but I think the most helpful thing for us has been the community center that we found.
- 29:25SPEAKER_02: So my goal is to one day open a community resource center for homeschooling because you need other moms to talk to.
- 29:35SPEAKER_02: You need to, Ask for help.
- 29:37SPEAKER_02: You need to see how they solve this problem because chances are if you're going through a challenge with your kids with homeschooling, there's definitely another mom who has done that already.
- 29:47SPEAKER_02: So
- 29:48SPEAKER_01: that's why they say it takes a village, right?
- 29:52SPEAKER_02: It does.
- 29:52SPEAKER_02: It really takes a village.
- 29:54SPEAKER_02: And I have really enjoyed, you know, meeting so many other moms and just feeling that sense of community.
- 30:00SPEAKER_02: Like I'm not in this alone.
- 30:01SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
- 30:03SPEAKER_02: you know, there's Facebook groups you can join, but I definitely encourage anyone to find an in-person group that you can meet up with.
- 30:13SPEAKER_02: There's co-ops, there's, you know, Facebook meetups.
- 30:17SPEAKER_02: You can definitely find something in your area and every state has different homeschool laws.
- 30:22SPEAKER_02: So like our homeschool center has, you know, pamphlets there about the PA homeschool law and you can, make sure you're doing everything you're supposed to be doing, and every state's different.
- 30:37SPEAKER_01: Right, and I'm sure, like I'm in Canada, so I'm sure it's the same here because our schooling is different, right?
- 30:43SPEAKER_01: Like we all have different, there's different schooling districts in Canada.
- 30:48SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's awesome.
- 30:49SPEAKER_01: And so if a mom came to you and had kids, say, your age right now, and they're in the regular school system, and was just asking you questions, what would be the first thing you say to her?
- 31:01SPEAKER_01: If they were just asking about homeschool?
- 31:07SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like if they're sort of contemplating, you know, taking them out of regular school and starting to homeschool, what would be the first thing you say?
- 31:16SPEAKER_02: Well, I would say do it.
- 31:19SPEAKER_02: There's...
- 31:20SPEAKER_02: no reason not to just even take a break.
- 31:22SPEAKER_02: You can take your kids out of school for three months, you know, or a whole year.
- 31:26SPEAKER_02: And I would say you don't even have to do very much the first year, you know, you, um, kids are amazing.
- 31:34SPEAKER_02: Like they can take a break and pretty much get right back on track.
- 31:38SPEAKER_02: I've learned that too.
- 31:39SPEAKER_02: So that's the first thing I would do is comfort them to know that they don't have to know anything that they can dive in without knowing anything.
- 31:46SPEAKER_02: And, um, And just learn as you go.
- 31:49SPEAKER_02: I have friends who, they'll put their kids back into school for a few months and then they'll take them out.
- 31:58SPEAKER_02: And then they'll put them into cyber school the next year for a few months and then they'll take them out.
- 32:03SPEAKER_02: So there's, for me anyways, there was this program of like, oh, I have to, once I put them in, I have to keep them in for a year, but you don't really have to.
- 32:12SPEAKER_02: And you can put your kids back into school.
- 32:13SPEAKER_02: If you homeschool, And you're like, oh, wow, this is not working at all.
- 32:18SPEAKER_02: You can put your kids back into school at any time.
- 32:20SPEAKER_02: And there's no one's going to say, oh, you have to wait until next year.
- 32:25SPEAKER_02: So I didn't know any of that.
- 32:29SPEAKER_02: I thought if I homeschool, I have to homeschool all year.
- 32:31SPEAKER_02: Or if I do this, I have to do it all year.
- 32:33SPEAKER_02: But you don't.
- 32:33SPEAKER_02: You can jump around.
- 32:34SPEAKER_02: It's really fine to find what fits for your family.
- 32:39SPEAKER_01: Oh, well, that's awesome, actually.
- 32:42SPEAKER_01: That's really good advice.
- 32:45SPEAKER_01: Now, and I'm not sure if this is a silly question or not, can a mom who's homeschooling also work full-time?
- 32:54SPEAKER_02: No, that's not a silly question.
- 32:57SPEAKER_02: They can.
- 32:58SPEAKER_02: They can definitely do that.
- 33:01SPEAKER_02: If they work outside of the home, if they have family that can help support them, or one of my friends homeschools, he works outside of the home like three days a week and works she has partnered up with her neighbors who homeschool and her neighbors also work out of the home part of the week as well.
- 33:20SPEAKER_02: And so all the kids will go to one house, you know, while the one mom is home and they'll go back to the other house while the other mom is home and they, they share curriculum.
- 33:28SPEAKER_02: They, they just kind of do it together.
- 33:30SPEAKER_02: Um, so you can do it that way, but there's also, there's hybrid schools that exist that they'll follow like a homeschool curriculum.
- 33:41SPEAKER_02: Um, And they'll take your kids, for example, the one I'm thinking of takes your kids Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and they have them from 9 a.m.
- 33:49SPEAKER_02: to 4 if you want.
- 33:51SPEAKER_02: You can pick them up at any time.
- 33:53SPEAKER_02: But if you're working full-time, you can leave them there.
- 33:55SPEAKER_02: And then they'll teach them those days, and then they kind of pass off their work to you, and you teach them the other days.
- 34:03SPEAKER_02: There's like a million ways to do it.
- 34:05SPEAKER_02: But if you work from home, you could also homeschool as well.
- 34:09SPEAKER_02: Because to be honest, and a lot of people don't know this, Let's say you have like preschool to third grade.
- 34:17SPEAKER_02: You only need about an hour a day to teach them what they would be learning in school for all those hours because you only have a couple kids.
- 34:25SPEAKER_02: Like at school, they're trying to teach 30 at once, so they need more time.
- 34:28SPEAKER_02: If you have a middle school, you only need like two hours a day.
- 34:32SPEAKER_02: High school, you need three hours a day.
- 34:35SPEAKER_02: So you can definitely work that into like a work-at-home schedule and say, okay, we're doing our school schedule.
- 34:41SPEAKER_02: this time of the day and that I'm going to work, you know, this time of the day.
- 34:44SPEAKER_02: And just reach out for if you have family or if you have neighbors.
- 34:50SPEAKER_02: You can definitely make it work.
- 34:53SPEAKER_02: Yeah,
- 34:53SPEAKER_01: it sounds like it.
- 34:54SPEAKER_01: And then in high school, you don't have to worry about, like, you know, babysitting necessarily, right?
- 35:00SPEAKER_01: And so that makes it a little bit easier.
- 35:03SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 35:03SPEAKER_01: Oh, I love that.
- 35:04SPEAKER_01: That's great.
- 35:05SPEAKER_01: I didn't know.
- 35:06SPEAKER_01: Like I said, I don't know a whole lot about homeschooling, and this is great.
- 35:10SPEAKER_01: I mean, we're not supposed to be talking about, you know, the logistics of homeschooling.
- 35:14SPEAKER_01: I wanted to know more about how you empower moms through your homeschooling.
- 35:19SPEAKER_01: So this, I mean, we're learning lots here.
- 35:22SPEAKER_01: Now, I just had a question that I, you know, okay, I know what it was.
- 35:27SPEAKER_01: It was about, like, the routine.
- 35:30SPEAKER_01: Now, you're unschooling, so you're doing a lot of, you know, experiences.
- 35:34SPEAKER_01: And so do you follow, like, a schedule at home so that you have time for yourself, time for you and your husband, and then time with each child separately?
- 35:45SPEAKER_01: Or do you just sort of wing it and sort of see how the days go?
- 35:50SPEAKER_02: We just wing it.
- 35:52SPEAKER_02: I have experimented with both ways.
- 35:56SPEAKER_02: And for us, what works better is just kind of letting it go.
- 35:59SPEAKER_02: And honestly, I found that when I let it go, all those things actually happen.
- 36:04SPEAKER_02: And when I'm trying to block out my time, it just creates more chaos for me.
- 36:10SPEAKER_02: But that's just us.
- 36:12SPEAKER_02: So everybody's different, but...
- 36:14SPEAKER_02: It does end up that I do spend time with each kid.
- 36:17SPEAKER_02: And, yeah, everyone's needs get met when I'm not really trying to control it.
- 36:25SPEAKER_01: Well, I mean, it makes sense, right?
- 36:27SPEAKER_01: I mean, because when you try to control it, then everything becomes tense, right?
- 36:32SPEAKER_01: But then every family dynamic is different, right?
- 36:35SPEAKER_01: Some people work better on a schedule than not.
- 36:38SPEAKER_01: And so you're, I mean, really, the number one thing is that all the needs are being met.
- 36:43SPEAKER_01: Do you take time out for yourself to sort of, you know, this is Tricia time and I don't want any interruptions?
- 36:51SPEAKER_01: I do.
- 36:51SPEAKER_01: I
- 36:51SPEAKER_02: actually booked myself into a hotel a few weeks ago.
- 36:55SPEAKER_02: I was like, I'm just giving you a weekend.
- 36:58SPEAKER_02: Oh, good for you.
- 36:59SPEAKER_02: I'm just, you know, you as a mom, you can tell.
- 37:02SPEAKER_02: You're maxed out.
- 37:03SPEAKER_02: You're like, okay.
- 37:05SPEAKER_02: I'm taking a full weekend.
- 37:06SPEAKER_02: But even during the week, you know, I do get breaks.
- 37:12SPEAKER_02: I'll get long stretches of breaks.
- 37:14SPEAKER_02: And I'll have weeks where I'm like, oh, I feel like I haven't got a break, you know.
- 37:17SPEAKER_02: But then I do.
- 37:19SPEAKER_02: And then...
- 37:20SPEAKER_02: You know, it just kind of all works out.
- 37:21SPEAKER_02: Sometimes I'll start feeling guilty that I'm not taking breaks, and then it's even worse.
- 37:27SPEAKER_02: Kind of like I've noticed that I do get breaks, and I don't have to be, you know, too worried about it.
- 37:35SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 37:36SPEAKER_01: And so, like, I mean, obviously my question was going towards your own self-care.
- 37:41SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 37:42SPEAKER_01: Because you know that you have to look after you, Tricia, fill your cup so that you can help fill their cup.
- 37:51SPEAKER_01: As a homeschooling mom, I would think that that would be an opportunity for you to also teach your kids, right, to say, you know what, you need to take time out for yourself, right?
- 38:03SPEAKER_01: Now is a good time for you to go, you know, read a book that you just want to read because you want to read it.
- 38:09SPEAKER_01: Or it's, you know, you want to go for a walk, go play in the backyard I mean, as kids, they do that anyway.
- 38:14SPEAKER_01: But, you know, like, we need to teach our kids that, you know, we need to take self-care time out of our day, right?
- 38:24SPEAKER_01: Oh, absolutely.
- 38:25SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and so I think kids will, you know your kids, and when they're like, okay, I've had enough, you know, and you take a step back and you go, okay, go do what you need to do, right?
- 38:37SPEAKER_01: And you do that for yourself, though, even if it's just five minutes.
- 38:42SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I do.
- 38:43SPEAKER_02: I do forget to do that for myself, to be honest.
- 38:46SPEAKER_02: I definitely forget.
- 38:47SPEAKER_02: And then I remember when I'm reacting, you know, not how I want to react and I'm feeling completely maxed out.
- 38:57SPEAKER_02: But, yeah, I mean, that's kind of what's nice about, you know, when we are home and they're doing their own thing and I can just kind of go outside in the backyard.
- 39:06SPEAKER_02: We have a nice little pond and a swing by it and I just kind of relax.
- 39:12SPEAKER_02: and do that.
- 39:12SPEAKER_02: Okay, good.
- 39:14SPEAKER_02: So that is good.
- 39:15SPEAKER_02: And I really like to be open with them about my emotions and just be completely honest.
- 39:22SPEAKER_02: Like, yeah, I'm really angry right now, you know, and show them what I do when I'm angry.
- 39:27SPEAKER_02: I'm really angry right now.
- 39:29SPEAKER_02: I'm going to go take a walk around the yard and take a couple laps or I'm going to go listen to some angry music and just you know like let them see what I do because you know it's normal to get angry and it's normal to get angry at each other that's like one of the things we've been learning this past year it's kind of like we're allowed to really be angry at each other and it's it's kind of normal you know it's like not something we have to really fix like let's just let it out
- 39:55SPEAKER_01: That's all.
- 39:56SPEAKER_01: I mean, I love this.
- 39:57SPEAKER_01: You know, I feel like our conversation can go on for hours because it's a different world for me, right?
- 40:03SPEAKER_01: I kind of did the, like, I was a stay-at-home mom, but my kids went to regular school.
- 40:10SPEAKER_01: And I couldn't, like, even, like, after this discussion, I couldn't imagine having them home 24 hours a day because there were days, especially when I, you know, started the perimenopause, there were days where, like, you know, the half hour that they were up before they went to school drove me crazy.
- 40:28SPEAKER_00: And
- 40:29SPEAKER_01: so I can't, like, honestly, like I'm praising you so much right now for having the patience to do this.
- 40:37SPEAKER_01: But I think I like the unschooling part of this because if you don't feel like going to the zoo, you don't go, right?
- 40:45SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 40:46SPEAKER_01: Like if you feel like sitting and watching Netflix all day, you can do that.
- 40:50SPEAKER_01: Yes.
- 40:52SPEAKER_01: As long as it doesn't become a
- 40:53SPEAKER_02: habit.
- 40:54SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
- 40:55SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I just love that.
- 40:57UNKNOWN: Yeah.
- 40:59SPEAKER_01: It just sounds like, you know, if I could go back, you know, maybe 25 years, maybe I would do the same.
- 41:06SPEAKER_02: Yeah,
- 41:08SPEAKER_01: honestly.
- 41:08SPEAKER_01: Knowing what I know to make.
- 41:11SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 41:11SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
- 41:12SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I
- 41:13SPEAKER_02: just
- 41:13SPEAKER_01: think...
- 41:14SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 41:15SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like, I mean, what about for yourself?
- 41:18SPEAKER_01: I know we have to, you know, sort of end the call here at some point, but what do you notice the most in yourself from before you started homeschooling to today?
- 41:30SPEAKER_01: I
- 41:32SPEAKER_02: just feel more grounded.
- 41:33SPEAKER_02: I feel more grounded in my life, if that makes any more sense.
- 41:36SPEAKER_02: I feel...
- 41:37SPEAKER_02: Yeah, just...
- 41:42SPEAKER_02: This way of living makes a lot of sense to me because I feel I've really sunk into this community feeling, and not only with our homeschool center, but within my family.
- 41:53SPEAKER_02: And it's kind of like a we.
- 41:55SPEAKER_02: Like, we're doing this.
- 41:56SPEAKER_02: We're doing that.
- 41:58SPEAKER_02: You know, if one of us is sick, we're all home.
- 42:00SPEAKER_02: You know, we're all navigating it.
- 42:02SPEAKER_02: And it's just a different feeling than, you know, and I never could have seen myself doing this, but before I started homeschooling, And I was still freelance working, but I was also a stay at home mom, you know, partly as well.
- 42:17SPEAKER_02: So, yeah, I could have never foreseen myself doing this.
- 42:22SPEAKER_02: But that's the biggest difference for me is I felt like before it was kind of like a.
- 42:26SPEAKER_02: okay, I do this and they do that.
- 42:29SPEAKER_02: And my husband does something else.
- 42:30SPEAKER_02: And then, you know, that's just how it is.
- 42:32SPEAKER_02: And there's nothing wrong with that.
- 42:33SPEAKER_02: It was just a difference.
- 42:35SPEAKER_02: And now the difference that I'm feeling and it just feels more grounding to me is that we do this.
- 42:41SPEAKER_02: You know, my husband still works outside of the house, but most of us are still doing, you know, we're doing this and then we're doing that.
- 42:48SPEAKER_02: And it just feels like a nice together grounded feeling.
- 42:52SPEAKER_01: Right, yeah, I get that sense from you that you're more together as a family now than you were beforehand.
- 42:59SPEAKER_01: And I feel like that's kind of the normal.
- 43:02SPEAKER_01: I feel like that's more normal now, right?
- 43:05SPEAKER_01: Like that's the way you're meant to be, right, is together as a family.
- 43:11SPEAKER_01: Oh, my gosh, I love this.
- 43:13SPEAKER_01: I just love it.
- 43:15SPEAKER_01: Is there anything that you want to share with our listeners today that would empower them to, you know, maybe make the choice of homeschooling if they still have that option or if they are actually, maybe even if they are because, I mean, we have homeschoolers, you know, all around us, you know, whether we know it or we don't.
- 43:38SPEAKER_01: Is there any kind of advice that you could give to all of us about homeschooling or maybe even not about the homeschooling, just about your journey as a mother, right?
- 43:49SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
- 43:53SPEAKER_02: Just let yourself do it.
- 43:54SPEAKER_02: That's what came to mind right away.
- 43:55SPEAKER_02: Just let yourself do it, whatever it is.
- 43:58SPEAKER_02: You know, whatever you're feeling bubbling up inside of you as a mom, it's kind of like, you know, so let's just let yourself know, let yourself be wrong.
- 44:06SPEAKER_02: Let yourself say, Oh yeah, we're going to try homeschooling and let yourself say, okay, this, this is not for us.
- 44:13SPEAKER_02: You know, or let yourself say, I need to go back to work because that feels really good to me.
- 44:17SPEAKER_02: Or let yourself say, I need to quit work because this is not working for me.
- 44:25SPEAKER_02: Just, you know, let yourself do it and let yourself change.
- 44:29SPEAKER_02: Just continue to try trial and error and see what works and what doesn't work.
- 44:36SPEAKER_02: But you're...
- 44:37SPEAKER_02: What I want to say to moms is you can't make mistakes, okay?
- 44:42SPEAKER_02: Whatever you do is going to work out for your kids because they're going to learn from it and grow with you through whatever you're doing.
- 44:49SPEAKER_02: So don't beat yourself up.
- 44:51SPEAKER_02: Just do the thing and have fun.
- 44:54SPEAKER_02: That's what I want to say.
- 44:56SPEAKER_01: Oh, I love it.
- 44:57SPEAKER_01: I love that.
- 44:58SPEAKER_01: And, you know, you're right, right?
- 45:00SPEAKER_01: And the thing is your kids will learn you're human too.
- 45:03SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
- 45:05SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
- 45:05SPEAKER_02: Yes,
- 45:06SPEAKER_01: yes.
- 45:06SPEAKER_01: Yeah, absolutely.
- 45:07SPEAKER_01: I love that.
- 45:07SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you so much for joining me today.
- 45:10SPEAKER_02: Thanks for having me.
- 45:13SPEAKER_02: I really enjoyed it.
- 45:14SPEAKER_01: Yeah, this was a great conversation.
- 45:16SPEAKER_01: And, you know, like I said, I wish I would have known more about this, you know, 25 years ago.
- 45:21SPEAKER_01: But at the same time, I believe that, you know, we are where we are because that's where we're meant to be.
- 45:26SPEAKER_01: So thank you so much for sharing all your knowledge with me.
- 45:31SPEAKER_01: Oh, you're welcome.
- 45:33SPEAKER_01: Oh, thank you so much.
- 45:35SPEAKER_01: Confidence in Bloom is a celebration of self-love, a confirmation that even though you may not look like a screen star or a supermodel, they don't even look like that, you are an amazing, desirable, brilliant, gorgeous, talented woman.
- 45:48SPEAKER_01: We offer unconditional love to our partners, our children, our extended family, even our pets.
- 45:54SPEAKER_01: It's high time we got out of our own way and learned to unconditionally love ourselves.
- 45:59SPEAKER_01: In full bloom, styling and coaching offers an online course combined with one-on-one coaching in confidence building, personal branding, and creating your signature fashion look.
- 46:12SPEAKER_01: Chic definitely does come in every shape, so if you want something to believe in, start with yourself.
- 46:17SPEAKER_01: If you'd like to be a guest here on Confidence in Blue, contact me through Instagram at InfoBlueStyling or by email at Tina at InfoBlueStyling.com or through the Divas That Care website.
- 46:30SPEAKER_00: Thanks for listening.
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