Latest / Honey Badger Radio / What has psychology forgotten about boys since the '60s? | HBR Talk 279

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What has psychology forgotten about boys since the '60s? | HBR Talk 279 · Honey Badger Radio

• 0:00
  Hello, and welcome to Technical Difficulties with the Badgers. I already realized I
• 0:07
  forgot something, but before we get to that, Hello and welcome to HBr
• 0:10
  Talk two seventy nine does and I left the old title end too, is
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  something about what have we forgotten about boys in modern psychology? Not the title
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  that I have on my page. What has psychology forgotten about boys since the
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  sixties? That's what it was. So I'm your host, Tannahwallen here with
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  Nonsense Annihilator, Learned Brooks and the Personification of Perceptivity Mike Stevenson, and tonight
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  we're going to continue examining that old video from the nineteen sixties case study on
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  an aggressive child, and see you see if you can tell like we figured
• 0:45
  out, you know, toxic masculinity was missing from from the doctor's statement last
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  week. But but there are a few other things he's not doing that we've
• 0:57
  been accused historically, our culture has historically been accused of suggesting about boys that
• 1:07
  I didn't hear in this at least not so far. And we'll we'll start
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  by looking at the mother's expression and then going on to hear the doctor's words.
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  But first I actually have to screen share with my co hosts so they
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  can tell where I am in the video. So I'm going to do that,
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  and it's going to take just a second, and then we will get
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  onto doing what we gotta do. And let's see here, all right,
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  Can you guys see the video my co hosts clicking on the button. My
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  computer's thinking, yeah, that's that's the fun part of doing this. It
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  doesn't I was hoping I would be able to use. I have a desktop
• 1:57
  computer and laptop that I for this together. And the desktop computer is a
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  little old. It's on System seven. It won't run System ten. I
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  could go up to I think eight instead of seven, but it won't go
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  up to ten, and it's more and more things are not working on it.
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  I'm eventually gonna have to update it. One of the problems is Discord
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  doesn't like System seven anymore. So if I want to, for instance,
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  create an alt account, bring it into the live show, screen share on
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  that and control that on the other computer and so that I'm not like doing
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  everything in this window on this laptop that is better than the desktop. It
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  has problems. It won't it won't play, it keeps buffering, and stuff
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  like that, but if I do it, I have to stay in this
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  account. If I do it on the laptop, and then every time I
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  move away from this it says it's paused, so and then they can't see
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  the video. So it's it's just a a cacophony of technical issues that one
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  day I need to just sit down and take time to figure out, maybe
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  start using the other laptop. I got to make videos that I haven't made
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  videos with yet, And there you go. But it'll it'll all work out
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  once if we if we ever get fully stocked or fully staffed at my other
• 3:30
  job, and I actually have some days off. But in the meantime,
• 3:35
  we do gotta do what we gotta do. So, as always, Honey
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  Badger Radio dishes out Ace Mortgage Board of thought provoking discussions and as recent boat
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  you can find your way to all of our content, as well as a
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  link to feed the Badger dot com in the dropdown menu at the top of
• 4:42
  the page. And you know, as we talked about last week, modern
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  psychology is antimasculinity, full of antimil biases. Boys face a lot of discrimination
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  in it. We're familiar with the shaming and blaming. We looked at the
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  difference between how this boy was being treated by the psychologist in regard to his
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  violence, where he was trying to figure out the child, What has the
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  child learned? What is the child's expectation? You know, why is the
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  why does the child think he's behaving this way? Things that modern psychologists would
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  not do. They would tell you why you're behaving that way. They would
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  tell you that you have toxic masculinity. They would tell your parents that you
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  have toxic masculinity. And maybe you need to try on a princess costume or
• 5:31
  something to make you feel less aggressive, because princesses never kick little boys and
• 5:38
  the shins to show how much they like them. I didn't do that.
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  I was. I was not. I didn't approach people like but I did
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  have a friend that did something like that. She kicked a little boy pretty
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  pretty hard the shins. But in any case, and and then then my
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  mom going, you know, well, she she did that because she likes
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  him, And I'm like, that's that's not how I treat people. What
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  I liked him, well, would you do well? I would bring him
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  cookies. We had this conversation, and I think my mom laughed for like
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  an hour after that. I would bring him cookies. Duh, not those
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  kind of cookies your perverse. No, No, that that's much later.
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  We were in like kindergarten when when she kicked him, and I was,
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  I was like, why didn't she just bring him cookies? Everybody likes cookies
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  very simple, very simple way of showing you, like someone here have a
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  cookie. But but yeah, so we watched quite a bit of that and
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  we finished up. If you remember last week, the doctor had been talking
• 6:55
  to the mom about her discipline, and she talked talked about how she masks
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  her anger during a show of discipline, and he pointed out, you know,
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  well, what are you teaching him? You know, you're teaching him
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  that punishment isn't associated with him having done something bad enough to make you angry,
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  and that that kind of that struck me because I don't I don't think
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  modern psychologists would consider that either. They might actually tell women not to display
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  anger in front of their sons because they don't want the boy to learn to
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  display anger. And in this in this way, like the boy doesn't learn
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  how to mitigate his lack of control when he is angry. So let's start
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  with the next. The next moment in the video, she's you see on
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  her face her eyebrowser up considering that, and I'm just like, oh,
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  that's kind of neat. It actually struck her, all right, play actually
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  play, come on there we go. No, that's the other drawback of
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  doing this along one screen is it the video doesn't want to actually start playing
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  while I'm on the page. It's it's mad, Yes it is, Yeah,
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  we have it's it's perfect. I'll just let it do this and then
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  later I'll make a gift. Well that you're trying very hard to teach him,
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  but you're also trying to grow very hard not to teach him, because
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  when you're angry, you're entitled be angry. If you're putting a little on
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  that is it also possible that they're curving a lot of lum he might give
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  them, because if one learns to put a lid on feelings, it's very
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  hard to open up the lids for feeling A, but closes for feeling B.
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  The thing is I find before she makes her excuse, I want to
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  point out we keep hearing from feminists that men are men are men are suffering
• 9:28
  because they fail to express their feelings, they fail to talk about their problems.
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  Right, But every time a guy has anger, when he's talking about
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  his problems and expressing his feelings, then we hear that's toxic too. He
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  can't have that one, he has to have the other emotions. So what
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  this guy just said about if you mask one emotion it becomes harder to express
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  another. That's pretty relevant to the modern discussion on so called toxic mass sculinity
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  and men expressing themselves. If they're not allowed to be angry, then how
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  can they be allowed to be sad or depressed or lonely or even just you
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  know, enthusiastic, happy and enjoying themselves any of that. Any emotion that
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  makes women people, that makes women feel fair, is right out, I'm
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  afraid. Yeah. So you can feel guilty all you like, but you
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  definitely can't feel anger, and you can't even feel fair because feeling fair makes
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  women feel even more fair. It's your job to be braved against the elements,
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  after all. Well, but then there's certain situations where anger and things
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  like that are okay in service to women. Oh yeah, and that's god,
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  it's it's not only it's not only that you can't express these certain emotions.
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  You can, but they must be in service of women at the time
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  that you're you're expressing these emotions, that's the only acceptable time. Yeah.
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  When you make a set of emotions for voting like that, it creates all
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  kinds of problems. They used to understand this in psychology and they would talk
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  to you about it when you know you like my my psychiatrist that I went
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  to this this would have been nineteen. I started in nineteen eighty nine and
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  I think I went through nineteen ninety two before he decided, might you know
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  I didn't need him anymore. But one of the things that and and this
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  is something that came out and I think it's a It was a movie with
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  Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler about about anger anger management as well, was I
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  was trying to manage when I would get super angry. I was trying to
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  manage that anger by champing it down in you know, like I'm gonna just
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  gonna compress this a little bit and and put it away and I'm not gonna
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  have it. It's not not there anymore. And it doesn't work like you
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  have to process it. You have to think about, you know, what
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  is it that that you're angry about? What what's the reason that you're angry
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  about it? And is it are you being reasonable or unreasonable? And and
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  yeah, and the movie is called anger Management, but uh and and so
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  on. You you can't just like not deal with it, you know,
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  And it's it's a lot like another Adam Sandler movie with the kid that that
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  comes to live with him, where you know, they spill the milk on
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  the floor and he puts a newspaper over it, and that's kind of what
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  I was doing, right and uh and and then it would then it would
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  bubble up. The next time I would get mad, I would still have
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  the other anger there and and then I would blow up and say things to
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  people that I didn't mean, and like I don't, I don't hit people
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  when I'm mad. I have a very serrated but razor sharp tongue and it's
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  it's downright evil, like it's it's embarrassingly so like you guys think the Kreen
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  meme is bad, but I have the capacity to be a terrible, terrible
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  person for a few minutes when I get angry, and then of course later
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  on it's like, God, why did I do that? That's that's terrible.
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  That person is never going to forget that, you know, and it's
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  gonna hurt when they think of it, and you know, or or I've
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  I've changed their life if I've complained about them at work or something like that,
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  and yeah, that that's when uh, they or vid Kun at quels
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  as a gentleman never remembers what a lady says in anger or any other passion.
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  If if she's saying something that you shouldn't remember, she ain't no lady.
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  That's like I always say, you know, don't call me a lady
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  because you haven't seen me when I'm angry. Uh. And I've got control
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  over that now. Every so often I do work through it by finding a
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  better way to ream somebody. But this where she's hiding anger and teaching him
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  to not deal with it. A lot of women do what I do.
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  They have that explosive tongue. No jin bottle. I'm not a virgo.
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  I'm a cancer. You might not like me when you meet me, but
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  I'll grow on you. Inside every man is a monster. Yeah, yeah,
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  any of the masculinity heros will say, what is no different for women
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  and human beings or animals. But there's not just a beast inside, as
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  we literally are beasts. We're just beasts with these big brains that are occasionally
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  capable of We're going, wait, why why the hell do I do that?
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  And coming to the conclusion that sometimes sometimes you do just got to let
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  out the monster. It's and it's a case of controlling it. I'm denying
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  that there's any monster inside you is the worst thing you can do, because
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  it's going to surprise the hell out of you when everyone around you when it
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  finally comes out. Yeah, and it's not pretty. Just take that monster,
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  and you know, giving you some breathing space every now and again is
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  a way of saving it. Oh yeah, And and that's that's one of
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  the first lessons I had to learn, was you know, and and then
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  I had to be able to go through like being able to say, hey,
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  I'm angry about this, let's talk. And instead of getting out the
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  the bloodhound that sniffs out the thing that is going to make you question your
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  validity for the rest of your life and latching onto that and saying things that
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  that that that emphasize that. Uh, then then I talk about the thing
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  I'm actually angry about and and try to work it out. And it's like
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  it. I suppose if I had never been interested in seeking treatment for that,
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  I could have gone on to to develop the kind of personality disorder that
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  falls into the same spectrum of borderline. And I think some of that.
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  I'm not saying that everybody that has that disorder is willfully borderline or anything.
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  But I am saying that, you know, if you don't learn to process
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  and and and work around and work through what you're you're angry about or sad
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  about or things like that, it does turn you into a person with a
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  personality disorder as well. Right, Like you gotta take time and say,
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  well, you know, maybe maybe this is a really big deal, maybe
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  this is not a really big deal. But when I talk about it,
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  I need to be able to explain why it's a really big deal or not
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  a really big deal, and and why I need a minute and not say
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  instead, you know, some some horrible thing about the individual. And here
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  she needs to be able to have her son witness that. Look, I'm
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  angry with you because you said shut up instead of Mommy, I need quiet
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  for a minute. I'm thinking, you know and or something along those lines,
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  and that that's that hurts my feelings and you should say it a better
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  way so that I'm more inclined to do what you want instead of you know,
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  clapping back at you. And my mom did that when I was a
• 18:00
  kid. She did that with both of us, like we never we never
• 18:06
  heard when you're in trouble. You should have known better, and and and
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  all of that without any kind of explanation of you know, why this was
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  bad, why you know Mom was angry, why we had a consequence and
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  so on. So like that, that guy's I think he's right on the
• 18:27
  money. But let's look at at what she says here. Well, at
• 18:38
  least it does give me time to get back into the discord. So you
• 18:41
  guys can see the video this, This will make a good gift when you
• 18:48
  When I raise my voice to him, here his voice back. My husband
• 18:52
  is inclined to give in much is yeah than I. When I say something,
• 18:57
  I mean it. If I'm gonna persist and persist and persist, and
• 19:03
  the next minute my husband's kind to give him exactly what he wants, I've
• 19:06
  lost. Well, let's talk a little bit about that. So here's another
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  issue, and this is something I remember very strongly from my childhood. My
• 19:15
  parents were on the same page, but there were things that Mom wanted to
• 19:19
  be strict about that Dad was like, come on, that's that's silly.
• 19:25
  So I they had to work that out, and we saw them work that
• 19:30
  out one time. My mom was very strict about language when we were little
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  because my first cuss word happened because I heard her say shit when she hurt
• 19:44
  herself. So next thing, you know, I'm I'm playing with a doll
• 19:48
  or something and I dropped it and I'm like, oh shit. You know,
• 19:52
  my Dad's like, where did she hear that? Mom's going, well,
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  we just can't use that kind of language in the house anymore, right,
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  But she went overboard. So I might have been kindergarten maybe first grade
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  age when my brother and I figured out the rules, uh didn't match between
• 20:15
  our parents and us. I we had uh, you know, our rooms,
• 20:19
  and they had their room. We weren't allowed to go in their room
• 20:22
  without asking. Did it start playing again? Very hard not to teach them,
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  Oh, it's playing with discord angry. If you're putting a lot on
• 20:34
  that is it also possible that you're curving a lot of really stop feeling good
• 20:44
  grief. It's very hard to open up the lids for feeling a It literally
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  will not I didn't even hit the thing is, No, you won't be
• 20:53
  It's just me. I'm just hearing this. There we go, But the
• 20:56
  listeners will be hearing it. See that's the problem. I wonder if I
• 20:59
  can just get rid of there, we go, get rid of the in
• 21:04
  bed, and then it won't play die there We go. Okay, so
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  we figured out, you know, like they were allowed to come in our
• 21:15
  rooms without knocking, but we were not allowed to come into their rooms without
• 21:18
  permission. Well, obviously there's a difference between an adult's room and a child's
• 21:22
  room, and they had to be able to come in when we needed him
• 21:25
  and stuff like that. But you know, we had reached the age,
• 21:29
  at least I had reached the age where I started to have a concept of
• 21:30
  privacy. And so we talked about this, and we went out and we
• 21:34
  confronted mom and dad very seriously about this. You know, how come we're
• 21:37
  not allowed in your room when when you guys are allowed in our room without
• 21:41
  permission? And my dad got annoyed and he leans forward in his chair and
• 21:48
  he goes, there's a fart in the bedroom. You want to go smell
• 21:51
  it, you know, like basically trying to to you know, joke around
• 21:56
  with us about it instead of like explaining, you know, we have private,
• 22:00
  grown up things in our room, because that would just make us more
• 22:03
  curious, right, But we took it as an invitation, and we didn't
• 22:06
  know what a fart was. We'd never heard the word. And my mom
• 22:11
  even was like, oh, don't see that, you know said his name.
• 22:15
  She was very she was really not happy about this. So we left
• 22:18
  the room, you know, like, and they went back to watching TV,
• 22:22
  not realizing that they had just invited us to go in and search the
• 22:25
  room for the fart, which we did for like half an hour. We
• 22:27
  spent half an hour looking in drawers, under the bed, in the closet.
• 22:33
  We opened the closet door and there is a shotgun in there, and
• 22:37
  we both had been really really really taught you don't even touch that, so
• 22:41
  we closed the closet. Well, fart better not be in there, because
• 22:44
  we can't go in there because that'll kill us if we didn't touch that shotgun.
• 22:49
  Was but not a fuss. Oh yeah, they made sure that we
• 22:52
  knew. They made sure that we knew that if that thing went off when
• 22:57
  one if one of us messed with it and it off, that it was
• 23:00
  gonna hurt really bad. And uh so so we didn't. We stayed away
• 23:07
  from that. We looked under the bed, we looked in at every drawer
• 23:11
  that wasn't locked. One drawer was locked, so we thought, well,
• 23:14
  that must be where the fart is. It was like, no, there
• 23:17
  was medication in there, but uh and and and that's the other thing.
• 23:22
  They kept the medication locked, but they didn't have to keep the gun locked
• 23:26
  because authority did the job. Like we would not have touched that gun if
• 23:30
  somebody had broken into the house. But in any case, so we come
• 23:34
  back out and we we say to my parents, you know, we we
• 23:40
  we looked and looked. We've looked everywhere we can look in your room,
• 23:44
  and we can't find the fart. And I think, I think for like
• 23:48
  about twenty minutes, we thought we'd killed them. They were suffocating, but
• 23:55
  like they could not stop laughing. And finally my dad said to my mom,
• 24:02
  you just gotta be a little more open about language. And instead of
• 24:08
  teaching them that there are forbidden words, you teach them with You teach them
• 24:15
  that there are words that that are impolite and not nice to use in words
• 24:22
  that are more polite, and you choose your words depending on your company.
• 24:27
  That was how they got on the same page. And yeah, they could
• 24:30
  have done the same with the meds, but I don't think the meds were
• 24:37
  a permanent fixture at that point. Those were not those if I remember right,
• 24:47
  those were not meds that were permanent prescription. Like my mom did have
• 24:52
  permanent prescriptions. Much later, nineteen eighty two, we had a car accident
• 25:00
  that almost killed her and she had We didn't know she had ailers, you
• 25:07
  know, like that's she's They thought that was a tall person disease. My
• 25:11
  mom was five foot five, and I was taller than my mom by the
• 25:15
  time I was in the sixth grade. I was taller and bigger and outweighed
• 25:19
  her by the time I was in the sixth grade. And so when she
• 25:26
  got injured, it was a hell of an injury, Like she had joint
• 25:30
  hypermobility, and that includes your spinal column and the shock from getting hit at
• 25:37
  fifty five miles an hour and getting hit so hard that she was shoved into
• 25:41
  the driver's seat she was in the passenger seat. That that actually wrecked her
• 25:45
  back so bad that she had she ended up with degenerative disc disease and bone
• 25:51
  spurs and all kinds of stuff. So there's different medication in the house after
• 25:55
  that, And there's a whole discussion I could initiate about that but we're not
• 26:00
  going to do that today because this isn't about that. But uh, I
• 26:04
  think they locked up the the medication because mom was on penicillin, and by
• 26:10
  that time we had already My second near death experience was a dose of penicillin.
• 26:18
  Like I, it's the next time that I'm exposed internally to penicillin,
• 26:26
  I'd have a better chance if you shot me and then then if you know,
• 26:33
  like I before, my son stopped accepting penicillin due to the itchies and
• 26:42
  not wanting the allergy to get any worse. When he was little, I
• 26:47
  gave him penicillin under doctor's orders, and it was he was young enough to
• 26:51
  take liquid medicine. And I got a drop of it on my hand and
• 26:57
  I finished what I was doing a give him the dose. I wiped it
• 27:00
  off, washed my hands. A few minutes later, I looked down and
• 27:04
  I have, like that whole spot of my hand is just covered in blisters.
• 27:08
  Jes Like, that's my kryptonite. That's it's the sad truth, that's
• 27:15
  my kryptonite. I think I've talked about that before, not a notice.
• 27:22
  Well, to be honest, like, yeah, everything else makes me sick.
• 27:27
  That that that I'm allergic to makes me sick and it sucks, like
• 27:30
  I'll have, you know, sniffles, I'll have sneezes, I'll have stuff
• 27:33
  like but tennicillin makes me stop breathing, like penicillin makes my heart stop.
• 27:41
  So that's that's a bad one. And and yeah, provincial refuse to ensure
• 27:52
  me unless I had a full time job because they're like, you have too
• 27:56
  many things wrong with you and and and you've been diagnosed with depression, so
• 28:04
  we think that you might be suicidal. So and like they weren't wrong at
• 28:11
  that time, Well they were wrong at that time. They weren't wrong.
• 28:15
  They wouldn't have been wrong about a few years earlier, once I had kids,
• 28:18
  that that idea was gone. But yeah, they they wouldn't they.
• 28:25
  They sent me a letter back in the day. You have to have a
• 28:27
  full time job or we won't ensure you, like for life insurance. Yeah
• 28:36
  no, not provincial prudential. That's what it is anyway. But yeah,
• 28:41
  that that that that's all a tangent from like parents have to be on the
• 28:48
  same page. And my husband and I had to go through that because there
• 28:52
  were things that, uh, you know, you have a tendency to be
• 28:56
  overprotective when you're female, and you know, it's the dad that has to
• 29:02
  say, let him try it, let him do it. It's not that
• 29:06
  dangerous. We did that when we were kids, you know. And and
• 29:11
  you know, like if you live in a household where your upbringing says the
• 29:19
  parents are a team, but the husband is the head of the household,
• 29:26
  he is the captain of the team, then you have to be able to
• 29:30
  say, all right, you know, and unless you have something where you're
• 29:34
  like, here's my reasoning, and I'm really asking you to consider it because
• 29:40
  I'm really concerned about this, and you know, you you stop. And
• 29:45
  that's that's the whole way that we've handled things. Like if if I've been
• 29:49
  really concerned about something, I tell him my concerns and he like, he's
• 29:53
  never put his foot down without explanation. But there have been a few times
• 29:57
  where he said we're gonna to do it this way and here's why, and
• 30:03
  I've been like, okay, and that's the way it is. And one
• 30:07
  time he ordered me to get into the house because there was a skunk and
• 30:11
  I don't want me to get We don't know, we know I'm allergic to
• 30:15
  the musk they use in perfume, but we don't know if I'm allergic to
• 30:17
  skunk musk. I probably am. I would just say at this point,
• 30:22
  I would just say, oh, yes, probably yea. So he was
• 30:27
  protecting me from the skunk, like that's fair. If you're going to protect
• 30:32
  somebody, you have to be able to order them to get in the house.
• 30:33
  Right. But I would bet in the enlightened sixties, during the era
• 30:40
  of feminists get the woman out of the house feminism, she probably had different
• 30:45
  ideas about how men and women should behave in a marriage. Right, So
• 30:51
  I want to I am gonna go on and we'll see what the doctor has
• 30:57
  to say about this. And let me back five seconds here because it started
• 31:04
  playing too Here we go and we're buffering. Jeez, exactly what he wants?
• 31:18
  I love. Well, let's talk a little bit about that, because
• 31:22
  if you have an army with a dual command, you've got a very chayat
• 31:26
  chaotic situation. Well, that's exactly what I now. I know why you're
• 31:30
  you're introducing a new variable here in what play? Do you and your husband
• 31:37
  split your authority? And therefore this boy feels that he doesn't really have any
• 31:44
  unified command, and he doesn't have to learn, and he had too many
• 31:47
  teachers. We have too many people telling him what to do. Well,
• 31:51
  let's see where we can put our finger on the problem between you and your
• 31:55
  husband in terms of handling this boy. How do you see it? My
• 32:00
  husband is europe him and he was brought up again in a different way,
• 32:06
  perhaps nearer to my way of being brought up, in the way this child
• 32:09
  is being brought up. And he actually perhaps didn't have any sort of affection
• 32:15
  at all. He was brought up by governesses, which is even worse to
• 32:20
  quite a late page. So there's a little bit of privilege there. I
• 32:24
  would say, I don't know anybody that was brought up by nannies and governesses
• 32:31
  in my life, Like none of the people I know had that experience.
• 32:36
  We had occasional babysitters if mom and dad were going to be gone longer than
• 32:44
  our age warranted being home alone or after dark, right like my parents would
• 32:52
  do that when they were going to photograph a wedding, or when we were
• 32:54
  little, we would have babysitters. And I said, Europeans are no means
• 33:00
  any more likely than Americans to have the kind of wealth to send their kids
• 33:05
  to what y'all would call private skills, right, I mean it is a
• 33:10
  it is a thing here, which like I assume it's a thing in Europe.
• 33:15
  Yeah, it's not. It's not a European thing. It's a it's
• 33:19
  an upper class thing, not just a middle class thing, but an upper
• 33:22
  class Yeah. Yeah, she married money. She looks actually pretty well kept
• 33:32
  too. Like that. That hairstyle is a you'd have a perm and then
• 33:37
  you would use a curly iron to achieve that. And like my mom used
• 33:43
  to do her own perms, but a lot of women would would shell out
• 33:46
  for a curly perm and then they would get up early in the morning and
• 33:51
  they would style their hair like that. And and you know, she's got
• 33:54
  nice clothes. She's wearing like three you can see three layers there. There's
• 33:58
  a turtleneck in some sort of shirt under the turtleneck and a sweater and it's
• 34:04
  very well, all very well put together, Like you can't tell the colors
• 34:07
  matching and everything, but it's nice stuff. And I would bet that they're
• 34:14
  an upper class economically upper class. I mean they can afford to go pay
• 34:19
  for a psychiatrist. Yeah, they're well spoken, enough to be interviewed for
• 34:24
  a documentary in the first place. Yeah, and her accent is definitely not
• 34:30
  like mine. Yeah, it's much like so many folk tales are about royal
• 34:35
  families, and so many you know, Renaissance literature is written about royal families
• 34:42
  because because people want to hear about the level above them, the things they
• 34:50
  aspire to be. And it's much the same reason in the sixties and in
• 34:53
  the fifties when it was really only rich people that had televisions. Obviously,
• 34:59
  yeah, they would panda to to that element of society by showing them the
• 35:07
  people even posher than them. It's it's just I guess how these things work,
• 35:12
  and not some things have changed nowadays, because nowadays people are watching the
• 35:15
  Kardashians not because they're upper class, because they're rich degenerates. Yeah, because
• 35:24
  they're kind of a train wreck. So all right, well, let's see
• 35:30
  what else she has to say here, thinking, my computer is thinking,
• 35:40
  and he he works very hard, and he's very tired, and it really
• 35:45
  doesn't have too much patience, and he adores the child. Obviously that hasn't
• 35:50
  anything to do with it. But I think that here everybody's under such a
• 35:52
  strain, and it's very hard to know what to fulfill your commitments and your
• 36:00
  your responsibility towards a child. Well, you're apparently saying, the man in
• 36:05
  this house is your six year old boy. He's the boss. He gets
• 36:09
  mostly what he wants mostly. That's exactly right, And that's a very heavy
• 36:15
  responsibility for a six year old, isn't it. This is doctor Taylor Stetton
• 36:20
  hid so here we have, like our society has been accused of having this
• 36:27
  history of boys will be boys, boys will be boys. But the doctor
• 36:31
  basically just said, you can't just let him run the house. But that's
• 36:38
  exactly that's exactly what they're doing. Yeah. You know, when when we
• 36:45
  watched the first part of this video last week, I came away wondering,
• 36:50
  like, well, why is the mother being the disciplinarian. The husband's in
• 36:54
  the house, Why why is she the one that has to discipline the child.
• 37:00
  Of course, you know, obviously pragmatically the wife or the mother would
• 37:06
  be disciplining him for you know, things that he does, but you know,
• 37:12
  for something major, like if he's getting into fights. I mean,
• 37:16
  jeez, that's the way it was in my house. All you wait till
• 37:19
  your father gets home, you know, and that's that was the real punishment,
• 37:23
  you know, just sitting there waiting, thinking and agonizing over, oh
• 37:28
  my god, what's going to happen when my dad comes home and finds out
• 37:30
  about what I did? But it's not. It's not that way in this
• 37:35
  house. And now I kind of understand why she's getting frustrated because I think
• 37:39
  she feels like he should be. Well, obviously she just said it right
• 37:45
  out of her mouth. He's the one that should be taking on more of
• 37:46
  the disciplinary and or at least help to I guess her level of satisfaction with
• 37:52
  it, right, But what level is that? It's I don't know,
• 37:58
  I'm that that wealthy will to do entitled kind of Yeah, it's definitely different
• 38:08
  it, Yeah, and I can see it, you know, the longer
• 38:12
  we watched the video, I mean, and even in the way where the
• 38:17
  the psychiatrist or the doctor was asking her a question, he wasn't finished for
• 38:22
  his question, and she's talking over him. So she doesn't she lacks the
• 38:27
  discipline to sit and listen, you know, she's not she doesn't possess it
• 38:34
  herself. How is she going to teach something like that to her child?
• 38:38
  It is. It is a really big question, and like it's that sounds
• 38:43
  different than my house. Their house is different than my house. When I
• 38:45
  was growing up, I never waited for my dad to come home if something
• 38:49
  happened and my mom was there, Like if I did something I wasn't supposed
• 38:52
  to do, like my mom was home and my dad wasn't. I was
• 38:54
  not at school, or dad was doing photography somewhere or something, but he
• 39:00
  was not at home the day that we had a walnut tree that was in
• 39:05
  between our house and the neighbor's house, and its black walnut. It has
• 39:12
  to get pretty big before the branches get big, and if it doesn't have
• 39:15
  a great space for its root system, the branches don't get big and they
• 39:20
  don't hold your weight, even though it is a hardwood. And I was
• 39:24
  told not to climb that tree. I climbed all the other trees in the
• 39:28
  neighborhood, like everything else I could get. I climbed the UHF tower outside
• 39:30
  our house. I mean, I climbed my uncle like I would if we'd
• 39:37
  had cliffs, I'd have been on those two. Climbed the backstop of the
• 39:40
  baseball Diamon wants to trap a bully up there and got in trouble for that
• 39:45
  too. But yeah, I climbed up in that tree, and exactly what
• 39:50
  my mother said was going to happen would happen. One of the branches under
• 39:52
  my foot broke, and the unpredictable thing was there were black walnuts growing on
• 40:00
  a tree. Black walnuts have a hull like a husk around them, a
• 40:07
  little bit bigger maybe than well, about the size of a baseball. Actually,
• 40:13
  they're about the size of a baseball, and they're about as hard as
• 40:16
  a baseball, and their bouncy. So this walnut falls off of the branch
• 40:23
  below. When the branch I broke, fell and hit it, and then
• 40:30
  that walnut hit another branch and just crashed sideways through the bathroom window of the
• 40:37
  neighbor's house, so like there was no night getting caught. The window was
• 40:45
  broken. My kitchen window at my house faced that bathroom window. So my
• 40:52
  mom saw the window break, and she saw me come climbing down out of
• 40:57
  that tree, and so I come in the house. You know, I
• 41:01
  knew immediately that there was a problem, and we had the conversation. Did
• 41:09
  I tell you not to climb that tree? Yes, you know, yes,
• 41:15
  you told me not to climb that tree. Why did I tell you?
• 41:17
  What did I tell you? What happened? Branch would break? Did
• 41:21
  a branch break? Yes? And then what happened? I broke? I
• 41:24
  broke the neighbor's window, you know, And you know, how do you
• 41:29
  think the neighbor's gonna feel about that? We went through the whole thing,
• 41:34
  so you know, this is what happens when you are raised by teachers.
• 41:37
  It's like being raised by wolves, except with education. And so they Mom
• 41:45
  took me through the whole process of the inconvenience to the neighbor of having his
• 41:50
  window broken, and how much it was going to cost to get the window
• 41:53
  replaced. And then she made me come with her and we went over there
• 41:58
  and knocked on the door and I had to tell the neighbor that I broke
• 42:00
  his window and apologize, and then we made a promise to pay for the
• 42:07
  window, and then we set up a work schedule for me to earn the
• 42:10
  money for Mom to pay for the window. And all of that was done
• 42:15
  without any input from my dad until dad got home later and Mom said,
• 42:21
  this is what's going on. This is what we're doing. And Dad was
• 42:22
  like that sounds good. You know, he wasn't gonna he wasn't gonna change
• 42:29
  that. Yeah, Like that was And and I learned that if you fuck
• 42:35
  up and you damage somebody else's property, you owe them for it. And
• 42:38
  that was like most kids, you know, they're playing baseball or something and
• 42:43
  they they hit the ball through somebody's window. Everybody scatters, and nobody wants
• 42:46
  to take responsibility. But that was That was the way my parents handled things.
• 42:52
  And Mom did let me know she was mad. You know, she
• 42:57
  didn't she didn't hide that. She was like, you know, you you
• 43:00
  disobeyed me. Don't you think much of what I tell you this was important
• 43:05
  advice? Don't do you think I don't know what I'm talking about, you
• 43:07
  know, like we had the whole conversation, but a lot of a lot
• 43:13
  of parents don't do that, I guess, no, no, And you
• 43:19
  know what, I think, I'm seeing it play out in real time,
• 43:22
  like even at work, right because I have to hold people accountable for the
• 43:30
  things that they don't do. And I mean, you know, it's not
• 43:35
  it's never the end of the world. It's always something that can be fixed,
• 43:39
  you know, it's just a matter of acknowledging that this is when you're
• 43:45
  moving forward. This is something that you need to pay attention to and please,
• 43:50
  I need you to do this. And the reactions that I get from
• 43:54
  some of these young guys, it's like it's the end of the world,
• 44:00
  you know, grounding them and sending them to their room or something, taking
• 44:05
  away their their phone or something. It's like, did no one ever tell
• 44:09
  you that these are when you get to a certain place in position in life,
• 44:15
  you have responsibilities and you have to meet them. If you don't,
• 44:21
  there's consequences. That's just the way it is. But you know, you
• 44:24
  can't You can't go around blaming other people or being mad just because someone's pointing
• 44:30
  it out. You have to recognize that it's a fault of your own or
• 44:35
  an oversight. Okay, you know, but I'm seeing it more and more.
• 44:43
  They just don't like being challenged. Yeah, and it's it's it's unfortunate
• 44:51
  too because back in the day, you know, you used to understand that
• 44:55
  the whole point of discipline in child rearing is to help the child learn to
• 45:04
  evaluate a praise their their the actions they're considering before they engage in them.
• 45:12
  I think before you do, and then to take responsibility when they do and
• 45:19
  when they haven't anticipated or didn't think and they do something harmful or damaging or
• 45:23
  whatever. Then and to handle, you know, like there were things my
• 45:28
  brother and I negotiated with mom. Mom would say, well, you know,
• 45:30
  you can't bedtime is such and such. And I was a morning person.
• 45:37
  Mom had to give me a don't get up before six am order,
• 45:40
  you know, or if you get up before six am, you have to
• 45:45
  be quiet. I was never decide. My brother was the other end of
• 45:50
  it. He was he could he could sleep until, you know, late
• 45:53
  in the afternoon, but he didn't want to go to bed at the end
• 45:58
  of the day. And so there were there were negotiations. You got to
• 46:01
  be able to get up in the morning if you're going to stay up and
• 46:04
  watch the Hulk, you know, like the Hulk comes on late, and
• 46:07
  then you don't get to bet at till ten o'clock. I don't want to
• 46:09
  hear any complaints in the morning when you know we're gonna go do this thing.
• 46:15
  Because it was Friday night and it was Saturday morning, like and when
• 46:17
  you get up on a Saturday morning, you said you wanted to go do
• 46:22
  this thing, you know, and we have to be there by this time,
• 46:25
  so you got to be up. Like those were things that that you
• 46:30
  work out with the kid. But you can't do that if you can't let
• 46:34
  the kid know that you're angry when you're angry, if you can't be on
• 46:37
  the same page between mom and dad, right, and you know, none
• 46:40
  of that. It has to be you have to be a team. When
• 46:46
  you're married. You can't just be in love. You have to love each
• 46:51
  other. And there's a difference. Yeah, it's almost like and I'm pretty
• 46:57
  sure it is. I think parents are afraid of their kids these days,
• 47:00
  you know, because they know that if they do something, that kid can
• 47:06
  pick up the phone and I'm going to report you. And some of them
• 47:09
  have, you know, and it doesn't end well ness all the time,
• 47:15
  you know, but god it it's she's yeah, why don't I have kids?
• 47:22
  This is this is why, I mean, geez, I don't know
• 47:29
  anyway. Derek Workman says, six am. That is late. I got
• 47:31
  it before five thirty, which is when my mom went to work. Yeah,
• 47:35
  and let's see, that's the iffrom Everything that my parents did started at
• 47:38
  eight o'clock in the morning. My dad was a teacher. My mom would
• 47:43
  be involved in city things and she substitute taught and stuff like that, but
• 47:47
  she didn't do a full teaching contract and everything. And it was always like
• 47:55
  so, so they didn't have My mom didn't take two hours to get ready
• 47:59
  like a lot of women do. So it didn't you know, you didn't
• 48:01
  have to get up that early, and they didn't want to get up earlier
• 48:06
  than they had to, just like any other person, you know, besides
• 48:08
  me, Like yeah, but in any case, so, yeah, you
• 48:14
  you have to you have to be on the same page with stuff like that.
• 48:16
  You have to be able to and it's not that you know you're going
• 48:21
  to override each other necessarily, but you have to be able to work that
• 48:24
  stuff out before you have kids. Right, You can't just you can't just
• 48:32
  like wing it. Yeah, we're gonna get married, we're gonna have kids.
• 48:37
  We're gonna talk about this when when we start raising the child. You
• 48:42
  know, if we have a conflict, we're gonna get mad at each other
• 48:45
  and have a fight about it in front of the kid. That always is
• 48:47
  great, you know. Or and and and this woman, I think she
• 48:51
  has a lot of resentment built up about that, right, Yeah, And
• 48:54
  it might be that she's right. It might be that the child she's trying
• 49:00
  trying to teach the child to think before reaction stuff, and the the dad
• 49:05
  is not a good disciplinarian. That's a possibility that does happen. It also
• 49:09
  might be that it it's like what I had to learn with with my husband
• 49:16
  was you know, I was I was too too tight fisted in terms of,
• 49:22
  like, nothing can happen to my child because I you know, I
• 49:24
  didn't want to go through what my mom went through, where the kid tries
• 49:28
  to die every year. I'm neurotic about that. You guys had no idea,
• 49:38
  but but yeah, like so, so you know, I had to
• 49:43
  be told, you know, this is I'm not gonna I'm not gonna do
• 49:46
  that. We're gonna have to be calm about this. And I'm like,
• 49:49
  all right, all right, you know. So that that's one that obviously
• 49:54
  this couple has not worked out. They're just they're still dealing with the issue
• 50:01
  of who's in charge and whose idea of how behavior should happen, and what
• 50:08
  if they're in the same pretty bothered, I guess Philip and the mother have
• 50:17
  been trying to solve this problem for quite a while. I suspect it goes
• 50:22
  back a long way. She probably has really had the feeling that she would
• 50:31
  like Philip to get going on solving his babyhood problems and run about problems and
• 50:40
  things like that in rather a hurry. I would think he's been shamed out
• 50:47
  of taking his time or frightened to do the baby things at the baby baby
• 50:53
  time. And I wouldn't be surprised that if behind all this and drive and
• 51:02
  aggressiveness is they feeling of wanting to be understood as a baby. How sick
• 51:09
  is he or is he sick? Philips in trouble? He could develop,
• 51:17
  continue to develop and in what we call antisocial lines wherever he doesn't get along
• 51:24
  with anybody, has no friends, and seems to be against any situation that
• 51:30
  he might come into. And this could certainly leave him into serious trouble.
• 51:35
  Philip, on the other hand, I get the feeling from what I've seen
• 51:39
  so far, probably has considerable strength, certainly enough to get what will take
• 51:50
  care of him and look after him in perhaps rather a selfish way. How
• 51:55
  rigid a pattern is this aggressiveness of his at this age. It's not uncommon
• 52:02
  or aggression to come to the four at this point, but not this much.
• 52:07
  Not this much, because this is quite quite disrupting everybody. I just
• 52:15
  wonder and this will be the real test. There we go. Finally got
• 52:19
  it to pause, but try to pause it for a minute here. But
• 52:22
  it's it's interesting they're they're talking about this in terms of whether it's a sickness,
• 52:29
  whether it's an aspect of his development, and what are the contributing factors.
• 52:35
  And it's for me, I'm looking at this as they're talking about the
• 52:40
  mother trying to make him grow up too fast, and he's he never got
• 52:44
  a chance to be a baby, which is interesting because I've seen that happen
• 52:52
  in real time when I was a kid, with kids who were whose parents
• 53:00
  try to force them to mature psychologically faster than was natural for them. Like,
• 53:07
  you do learn to think about your behavior, and you do learn to
• 53:09
  think about you know, what will happen if I do this? Is is
• 53:14
  this the best approach to what I'm trying to get? And so on,
• 53:19
  sort of in a subconscious way. Right, you know this is against the
• 53:22
  rules, so you don't do it. You know that isn't against the rules,
• 53:23
  so you can do it, and you know that if you want to,
• 53:30
  you maybe ask mom for a concession on the rules that you have to
• 53:37
  have some sort of logic for her to look at and say, okay,
• 53:40
  well we can do that this time, right, But you have to be
• 53:47
  an infant first and then a toddler and then a preschooler, and you can't
• 53:57
  you can't step into elementary school self control before you go through those other steps.
• 54:05
  And every kid has to do that. There was a study done way
• 54:10
  back right about this time where they figured out that if a child never learns
• 54:17
  to crawl before they learn how to walk, it affects their ability to learn
• 54:22
  how to read. Like two things that look like they're completely unrelated. But
• 54:30
  they did therapy with this with children that were having difficulty learning how to read,
• 54:36
  and they had them learn how to crawl and it actually enhanced their ability
• 54:42
  to learn how to read. So all of this, you know where they're
• 54:45
  saying. If she didn't let him have to be understood as a baby when
• 54:52
  he was a baby and a toddler when he was a toddler before he became
• 54:57
  a preschooler, that may have affected his ability to be a preschooler. Like
• 55:05
  normal and could send him into antisocial behavior where today Yeah, today, if
• 55:15
  you went to a psychiatrist and you know, had the same conversations or similar
• 55:21
  conversations, and let the psychiatrist examine the child's play and talk to the child
• 55:27
  about his violence and everything, you might get toxic masculinity. The child has
• 55:35
  to learn not to be so masculine. Yeah, that's it. It's any
• 55:43
  doctor. Do you think it had anything to do with when we've denied him
• 55:46
  the ability to read lips and phases, but two is now heavens to murder
• 55:52
  joy, No, that would never happen. Ye, your son is too
• 55:55
  masculine. Yeah, but we'll referring to this department. I'm sure he'll enjoy
• 56:02
  it there, yep, where he's going to have tea parties and wear dresses.
• 56:07
  M thank you for not alluding to the worst part of the program.
• 56:14
  Yeah, I know where they're going to tell him being a boy makes him
• 56:16
  bad. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's a different department. That's not
• 56:23
  psychology anymore. That's just butchery. Well, just psycho They seem to be
• 56:30
  merging, if not fully, Yeah, they have they are, don't they
• 56:35
  Yeah, they do seem to be. It's it's really a horrible situation for
• 56:38
  kids. And and actually, yeah, Derek Workman has a point. The
• 56:45
  psychiatrist an interviewer would more likely be female. Today they've pushed men out.
• 56:52
  I see. That was the other thing, you know, when I when
• 56:55
  I talk about the psychiatrist I went to see to learn anger management, who,
• 57:00
  by the way, was not an anger management specialist because I started when
• 57:04
  I was underage, so he was technically a pediatric psychiatrist. I went to
• 57:07
  a man because the psychologist that my mom first took me to, who was
• 57:14
  female, just wanted to do talk therapy. And talk therapy doesn't really do
• 57:20
  me any good, Like just talking about stuff. It's nice, but it
• 57:30
  doesn't didn't solve the problem, like having somebody sit down and say, all
• 57:35
  right, here's what you're failing to do that you should be doing to work
• 57:39
  through your anger. You are skipping steps on your stairway. Here's the steps
• 57:44
  that you're skipping. You know, Yeah, like that that was important.
• 57:47
  It's it's similar to like a you know, when you're a toddler and you
• 57:52
  don't really have the words yet, but you want this thing. You don't
• 57:55
  know how to express yourself. You don't know how to get the thing that
• 57:59
  you want, and you're frustrated because everyone around you was just looking at you,
• 58:02
  like what's wrong with you? You know, it's a real simple thing.
• 58:09
  I just want that right there. I'm just not tall enough to get
• 58:14
  it. Can you? What are you, big gigantic fox? Just get
• 58:16
  it off that counter, because I would have put it in my mouth.
• 58:20
  Yeah. Well, or you're a kid and you throw a temper tantrum in
• 58:22
  the grocery store because you want They used to sell Hershey's used to sell a
• 58:28
  candy bar that it was the size and shape of a six pack of the
• 58:34
  regular size candy bars, and it was the sickness like when I was a
• 58:40
  kid, the regular sized candy bar was twenty five cents and the big one
• 58:44
  was fifty cents, and so it was the thickness of the fifties. I
• 58:46
  think those are like two dollars now, but yeah, they used to sell
• 58:52
  those, and so it was it was about half half inch maybe a quarter
• 58:57
  inch thick, a little between half finch and a quarter inch thick, and
• 59:00
  I guess it was about maybe eight inches long and three and a half four
• 59:06
  inches tall. It was a big, big bar of chocolate and it was
• 59:09
  you. You'd take it home and it had sections and you could break it
• 59:13
  up and have a little at a time, and it was it was nice
• 59:15
  to be able to get one of those. And they were more expensive,
• 59:19
  obviously than they were as expensive as two or three of the big candy bars,
• 59:28
  but they weren't as expensive as the amount of chocolate that was in the
• 59:32
  bigger candy bars because it was all in one package. And you know,
• 59:37
  my son wanted that one, and I had told him we would get a
• 59:43
  bag of those because he was little, little like, so I said,
• 59:45
  well, we'll get a bag of those little single serve like the bite sized,
• 59:50
  and he could have a couple of those because he was too little to
• 59:53
  eat that much chocolate without getting a tummy ache. And he had as only
• 59:58
  one and only temper tantrum ever in the grocery store, and threw himself on
• 1:00:04
  the floor, you know, did the spaghetti limb dance, you know,
• 1:00:10
  and he's looking at me, and you know, people are gathering because they
• 1:00:15
  always do when a kid does that, and he's looking at them. I
• 1:00:16
  have an audience. What the big candy bar? So I did it.
• 1:00:24
  I stomped my feet, did this spaghetti limb dance, which I could do
• 1:00:29
  very well because Ailor's and like my arms and legs, you know, and
• 1:00:34
  everything like completely like I had no bones. Well, you can't have the
• 1:00:39
  big candy bar. And he just stopped. Looks up at me. Mom,
• 1:00:49
  don't do that. That's embarrassing. You look silly people, sue,
• 1:00:54
  do you? That's what it looks like when you do it. So now
• 1:01:00
  we have a conversation, and we did, and we figured out, you
• 1:01:05
  know, there's this much chocolate in this bag as there isn't that candy bar,
• 1:01:07
  but they're all individually wrapped. You know, you have the whole discussion.
• 1:01:10
  You can have the little bit that you can have at once and there
• 1:01:14
  will be more for later, just like with the big candy bar. But
• 1:01:16
  you can't eat that whole thing. It'll make you sick and you'll never like
• 1:01:20
  chocolate again. Trust me. Have you ever seen me? And like I
• 1:01:25
  had, I had that with chili mac twenty years. I couldn't eat chili
• 1:01:30
  mac because I overstuffed myself on it. Through up by the way, that
• 1:01:35
  this is not good advice for single fathers or fathers who happen to be out
• 1:01:38
  at the grocery. Stop no, it's only okay if a woman does it.
• 1:01:44
  Yeah, someone's gonna taste you. But it did work. It completely
• 1:01:51
  worked, and it worked because you know, I spend all that time teaching
• 1:01:54
  the child to think. You know, that's like your job as a parent,
• 1:01:59
  pardon of your job as a parent is to teach your child to think
• 1:02:02
  and not just Oh Betty Adams's story in Rumble. When my brother was just
• 1:02:15
  pre verbal, he hated, hated going to sleep at night. We read
• 1:02:17
  him stories, try to see him sleep everything. As soon as he would
• 1:02:20
  get sleepy, he would start fighting, fighting the sleep till he was crying.
• 1:02:25
  Then he had started to get words, and he kept saying, my
• 1:02:29
  eyes are black, My eyes are black. It took us forever to figure
• 1:02:32
  out that when he closed his eyes, it got dark and he got scared.
• 1:02:38
  Yeah, that's we had. We had a night light in my room
• 1:02:44
  for a while because there was an object in the room that threw a shadow
• 1:02:51
  from the light that came in from the street lamps on the corner that it
• 1:02:59
  looked like somebody was standing in my room. But it was just a shadow
• 1:03:02
  on the wall, and I was I knew that logically, but when you
• 1:03:07
  wake up in the middle of the night and you're disoriented, it still scares
• 1:03:10
  you. And before I was fully awake, I would scream my fool head
• 1:03:15
  off and scare the ship out of everybody in the house over the stupid shadow.
• 1:03:20
  So Mom put a nightlight under the under where the shadow was until we
• 1:03:23
  moved and and and she also made me quilted curtains so no light came in
• 1:03:32
  and I was completely dark in my room. And then I didn't have any
• 1:03:36
  problems, right, Like, but you have to be able to tell your
• 1:03:40
  parents why you're upset for that to work, right You can't do that until
• 1:03:45
  you get speech. It doesn't work when you can't talk yet. And that
• 1:03:51
  that was part of the problem. So yeah, I can see that.
• 1:03:54
  And in this situation, you know that lack of lack of understanding of the
• 1:04:00
  kid and how the kid develops, and that the kid is not a miniature
• 1:04:05
  adult. They're adults in training they have to learn, and adults in development
• 1:04:11
  too, like they had their programming hasn't finished running. That builds the parts
• 1:04:15
  of the brain that handle those things. It's the same reason why although I
• 1:04:24
  know some people from some countries of my ancestry will disagree with this. You
• 1:04:30
  don't give children, you know, the alcoholic drinks that you give to an
• 1:04:35
  adult. And it's true that historically some people used to put beer in the
• 1:04:41
  baby's bottle, right, But they didn't put an adult dose of beer in
• 1:04:47
  the baby's bottle. You know. Yes, they would put whiskey on the
• 1:04:51
  child's gums if they were teething, but they didn't give the child three shots
• 1:04:56
  of whiskey because the kidneys have not developed properly yet and will not handle that.
• 1:05:01
  And you can't give the child an adult dose of expectations either, because
• 1:05:06
  the brain hasn't developed properly yet and will not handle that. Yeah, you
• 1:05:14
  know, I didn't know that you can actually kill a baby with water.
• 1:05:18
  Yes, yes, If if a baby is still very young and still drinking
• 1:05:24
  milk, you can't give it too much water. I had no idea,
• 1:05:28
  but got it. It makes sense. Their liver hasn't formed fully enough to
• 1:05:33
  be able to filter myself of the system. Yeah, fast enough. You
• 1:05:38
  can kill anything. You can kill a baby with anything. You can kill
• 1:05:41
  anything with anything. Yeah. The scariest part of parenting is that as soon
• 1:05:46
  as that child is no longer protected by the confines of your body. Everything
• 1:05:50
  in the world is a death threat. Yeah, right, Like they're the
• 1:05:55
  most fragile. Our species has the most fragile babies, like and and you
• 1:06:01
  know, we love them and we take care of them. But it's terrifying
• 1:06:06
  that that something can could you know, happen that would injure your baby,
• 1:06:14
  that you know, like they tell you not to have your baby in your
• 1:06:18
  bed because you can roll over on the baby and and suffocate them. But
• 1:06:24
  then if the baby's sleeping in another room, sids can happen, you know.
• 1:06:29
  And if you have a baby with acid reflux, you can't sleep them
• 1:06:31
  on their back because they can vomit and then aspirate that. But you can't
• 1:06:39
  sleep a baby on their tummy because they can get their face mashed into the
• 1:06:44
  bedding and suffocate. So like for kids with acid reflux, they have this
• 1:06:48
  device where you put the baby. You you you immobilize the baby on his
• 1:06:54
  side, on the side that prevents spit up. And then and then of
• 1:07:00
  all the stupid ideas, right the day after your baby is born in America,
• 1:07:12
  the hospital that you give birth at is going to recommend that you make
• 1:07:16
  a wound in the biggest organ in your immune system, the skin in a
• 1:07:23
  location where it is going to be exposed to the most bacterially infested substances that
• 1:07:30
  your body produces all the time because the child is incontinent, Hannah, you're
• 1:07:35
  not trusting the science, Yeah, clearly. And the worst part of that
• 1:07:41
  is when a baby is newborn, there is this thing called the blood brain
• 1:07:45
  barrier that keeps microbes from getting from your circulatory system into your brain that don't
• 1:07:56
  belong there. Right, that's not fully formed either. The barrier that keeps
• 1:08:00
  them from getting into your spine not fully formed. So if if the child
• 1:08:06
  gets a bacterial infection from something like that, if they get if they get
• 1:08:12
  poop bacteria in their bloodstream, it can get into their brain. And you're
• 1:08:18
  telling me that it's healthy to cut you know, like you can tell me
• 1:08:21
  it's healthy to cut the foreskin off of a little boy's penis when he's an
• 1:08:26
  infant and he's going to have shit and piss on in his diaper while that's
• 1:08:31
  healing. I'm like, that was a big fuck you for me right there.
• 1:08:38
  That's that's absolutely a shit idea, right, And yet it's very common
• 1:08:43
  here. It's very commonly practiced here, and medical professionals advise parents to do
• 1:08:48
  it. Yeah, they almost get defensive. If you don't want to,
• 1:08:54
  they get mad. Yeah, like they actually get mad if you don't.
• 1:08:57
  Because their their facility makes actually quite a bit of money if you do that,
• 1:09:03
  so because they can sell the skin, which the child does not get
• 1:09:06
  paid for, of course, but but yeah, they they take his skin
• 1:09:12
  and they sell it on a medical market. It's called neonatal four skin fiber
• 1:09:18
  blasts and uh and they're for like ten by ten cells if I remember right,
• 1:09:28
  a culture of ten by ten cells or something small like that. It's
• 1:09:32
  it's hundreds of dollars, you know. And and to people who think that,
• 1:09:40
  uh, you know, there's this things like this are a conspiracy.
• 1:09:45
  If you can these are baby part If you think that you can't get more
• 1:09:51
  than just a few skin cells on these types of websites, you would be
• 1:09:57
  absolutely uh you know, deluding your self. Just the idea that there are
• 1:10:02
  websites dedicated to things like this is turning my stomach. But it's just the
• 1:10:11
  reality of the world that we live in today. You know, car sick
• 1:10:18
  me, it's fucking sick. Yeah. And the American Medical Association uh seems
• 1:10:27
  to be completely off their rocker in regard to this, and particularly the pediatric
• 1:10:32
  end of it, like they don't they don't say anything about that. So
• 1:10:36
  and that's that's another one like that was even more common than than it is
• 1:10:43
  now. In the sixties, it was fairly common, like most little boys
• 1:10:45
  that were born or we're getting circumcised, and and that's something. If you
• 1:10:51
  do that to a child, you put them through pain is like you learn
• 1:11:00
  to deal with pain as you get older, but it is tortuous and at
• 1:11:04
  infancy, a minute of pain feels like three minutes of pain, ten minutes
• 1:11:11
  of pain feels like, you know, a half hour of pain. And
• 1:11:18
  they were doing it back then without any anesthetic, you know, like,
• 1:11:24
  and they're still doing it mostly without anesthetic now very frequently. They used to
• 1:11:28
  think that babies didn't feel pain. They would do surgery on babies back then
• 1:11:30
  without any anesthetic because they thought the nervous system wasn't developed enough. They thought
• 1:11:38
  the crying was a reflex. Oh god, yeah, and of course it's
• 1:11:44
  not. And when if you've ever seen the movie the documentary American Circumcision,
• 1:11:51
  or if you've ever seen the Red Pill documentary that has the circumcision seen from
• 1:11:57
  the American Circumcision document or it's horrifying, Like yeah, I can't, I
• 1:12:02
  can't watch it without sobbing. It just it's not so bad for that poor
• 1:12:05
  little baby. And yeah, it's there's a once you've raised a baby,
• 1:12:14
  when you hear a baby cry, you can feel it tugging on everything inside
• 1:12:18
  your chest. You want to go pick up that baby and comfort that baby.
• 1:12:23
  And there's it's a baby on the screen that is not just crying but
• 1:12:27
  screaming in pain and suffering and then going into shock. And you can see
• 1:12:33
  the moment where the baby goes into shock and stops screaming and starts just shuddering
• 1:12:39
  and seeing shivering, and it's it's horrifying. And they do that every day
• 1:12:45
  in hospitals all over the country to babies all over the country for money,
• 1:12:51
  and that that's supposed to not interfere with their emotional develop development. Are you
• 1:12:57
  kidding? That actually makes it very difficult for them to express themselves emotionally and
• 1:13:03
  deal with to identify their emotions and deal with like all right, I'm angry.
• 1:13:10
  This is why I'm angry, this is this is what needs to be
• 1:13:14
  done about it. This is what I need to do, here's how I
• 1:13:15
  can handle it, and so on. That gets damaged when you inflict that
• 1:13:20
  level of pain and infancy, and it's documented, there's research that shows that.
• 1:13:27
  Yeah, and I say, you know, intactivism is one of my
• 1:13:32
  things. And so you know these Twitter threads, you know, you get
• 1:13:36
  these people that are like, well, you know, I had a circumcision
• 1:13:42
  and I'm fine. So I don't know what these people are crying about.
• 1:13:47
  Well, you know, I had a small part of my lady it removed
• 1:13:50
  when I was a sixteen year old, and I'm fine with it because it
• 1:13:55
  at least sucked to have scar tissue there that was tearing and catching on my
• 1:13:58
  clothes and stuff. But I wouldn't say that other women should have to have
• 1:14:01
  it done too, because I'm fine with it, right, Right, But
• 1:14:06
  that and I think that's indicative of the kind of disconnect that circumcision creates.
• 1:14:14
  Right, There's a disconnect between men and their own bodies. Right, It's
• 1:14:17
  like, well, it's this part of me has been amputated. I don't
• 1:14:21
  know, it still kind of works. I'm good with it, you know,
• 1:14:27
  And the trauma of what happened to them is just cut off in their
• 1:14:32
  mind. It's really only until men learn exactly what they did lose, and
• 1:14:40
  that's when they get angry. Yeah, you know, and it's harder to
• 1:14:45
  deal with that anger because that's been affected by the trauma. So exactly,
• 1:14:53
  Zapier and actually we have two. Meredith g gave his five dollars in a
• 1:14:57
  super chow and said, HBr top two seventy nine, honey for the Badgers.
• 1:15:00
  Remember super chows are better than super chats. Zapier gave us five dollars
• 1:15:05
  and said. My aunt was a single mom of two both of her sons.
• 1:15:09
  My cousins have different dads and they're four years apart. I remember watching
• 1:15:13
  my aunt put the responsibility on disciplining her youngest on her oldest. Oh that's
• 1:15:17
  all. She would threaten her youngest to behave properly, telling him that she'll
• 1:15:23
  tell her oldest about his misbehavior. Basically, she abused the sibling rivalry some
• 1:15:28
  families have. Fast forward twenty years later, they hate each other and want
• 1:15:32
  nothing to do with each other. And last year I hear they haven't spoken
• 1:15:35
  in years. Oh jeez, I would I would. I wouldn't be able
• 1:15:42
  to deal with that, like My brother and I are still close, right,
• 1:15:46
  we were a thousand miles apart physically, but we're still close. Like
• 1:15:50
  there's no I don't know that. That would just kill me, but yeah,
• 1:16:00
  that's that's Machiavellian tactics. Che It was only ever meant to be taught
• 1:16:06
  to royalty in a way of how to not even how to control their own
• 1:16:13
  their own family, but to control provincial princes, to make sure they don't
• 1:16:18
  get too upper toy against the royal family, to advise it to parents.
• 1:16:26
  Is this is this is why macki Avellian is considered almost a slur, because
• 1:16:33
  because it's so openly manipulative. It's the handbook on how to how to be
• 1:16:41
  a master manipulator. And you know, there's there's there's in parenting. There's
• 1:16:47
  a place for being able to manipulate your children, but not to play them
• 1:16:50
  off against each other like that, like you're in a in a potential war
• 1:16:57
  and later civil war against him. I mean, holy crap. My parents
• 1:17:02
  raised my brother and me to understand that as siblings, it was our job
• 1:17:09
  to help each other and be there for each other, and we gave each
• 1:17:13
  other advice and stuff, but discipline for Pete's sake, Like that would never
• 1:17:18
  have been a thing. I didn't even really babysit my brother, but we
• 1:17:23
  were only two years apart. But you know, I like, I don't
• 1:17:29
  think. I don't think if we'd have been further apart, i'd have been
• 1:17:33
  the babysitter. I think it would have been I don't know. My parents
• 1:17:38
  didn't didn't seem to think that was appropriate. They would have brought somebody else
• 1:17:43
  in. Like that's crazy, and yeah, it is quite manipulative, and
• 1:17:50
  it ruined their relationship, which you want your kids to love each other because
• 1:17:56
  they're going to be a resource for each other as they get older. It's
• 1:18:00
  crazy. Well, it goes to show you some people just want everyone to
• 1:18:04
  love that. Yeah, that's that's that sounds like a narcissist did that.
• 1:18:11
  Albert Nader Retro gave us five dollars Canadian said, here's five dollars Canuckian or
• 1:18:17
  two dollars and fifty cents American. Uh, we're about headed that way where
• 1:18:21
  it's it's always been a joke in America that you know a lot of places,
• 1:18:26
  well we don't want accept Canadian coins because if Canadian quarter was worth less
• 1:18:30
  than an American quarter. But if we if we keep devaluing our currency,
• 1:18:35
  uh, Canadian money might become more value, you know, more valuable than
• 1:18:40
  American and like the pound always has been, and instead of my two cents,
• 1:18:46
  it will be my zero point zero zero zero zero two cbdc. Yeah.
• 1:18:53
  Well, you know, like Americans are rapidly becoming quite senseless. Actually,
• 1:18:58
  I think there's there's a pretty big underground of very sensible Americans that are
• 1:19:04
  very angry about what's going on and very scared to try to say or do
• 1:19:09
  anything about it because of what happened on you know, the last time Americans
• 1:19:14
  tried to say or do anything about something that they felt was very wrong.
• 1:19:19
  But in the meantime, we'll get back to our psychiatrist here and then discussing
• 1:19:27
  the child. And remember we were talking about the child not getting to experience
• 1:19:35
  his early childhood development naturally because the mother didn't let him be a little boy
• 1:19:40
  before he was a bigger boy. We now have the confused guy with the
• 1:19:46
  buffering here. I'm assuming this is the only child. I would bet I
• 1:19:54
  would bet it was the only child like that, which also which also plays
• 1:19:59
  a role. If he is the only child you know, because she said
• 1:20:03
  she didn't have any other any other kids, and I doubt that the father
• 1:20:08
  was married before her, so I think he probably is the only child.
• 1:20:12
  Yeah, the video is sort of playing and not playing. That's that's interesting.
• 1:20:17
  Pattern him in perhaps rather a selfish way, has considerable strength, certainly
• 1:20:27
  enough to get what will take care of him and look after him in perhaps
• 1:20:31
  rather a selfish way. How rigid a pattern is this aggressiveness of his at
• 1:20:38
  this age. It's not uncommon or aggression to come to the foe at this
• 1:20:44
  point, but not this much, not this much, because this is quite
• 1:20:50
  quite disrupting everybody. I just wonder, and this will be the real test
• 1:20:55
  as to whether or not we're going to see any softness and babiness and loving
• 1:21:00
  this come through. And thought it h some of this does come through,
• 1:21:06
  then I think that Philip will be able to solve his problems and rather satisfactory
• 1:21:15
  way, with a little bit of help. Facts are one thing, Feelings
• 1:21:17
  another. The doctor must so notice again they're talking about like now, this
• 1:21:25
  is a child who is in nursery. Nursery school they called it. So
• 1:21:30
  Nursery school was basically sort of a daycare and a preschool at the same time
• 1:21:35
  it's it's pre kindergarten. Kindergarten is part of the elementary school system, the
• 1:21:42
  public school system. Not all children in the sixties went to daycare or preschool
• 1:21:48
  or whatever that was. The longer you go back, the less likely parents
• 1:21:55
  were to put their children into an environment like that. They would just play
• 1:22:00
  and be kids until they started into the elementary school system. But upper class
• 1:22:04
  people felt that kids needed it in between step and that was the step,
• 1:22:10
  and working mothers would put their kids in daycare because they needed something that was
• 1:22:16
  going to be there every time they needed to go to work. They would
• 1:22:19
  have a schedule, you know, in the daycare, and so you would
• 1:22:24
  go and they called that nursery school as well, and it was expected to
• 1:22:29
  do things like you know, you you would sing songs about the alphabet and
• 1:22:32
  color pages and you might have to color the word pink pink and stuff like
• 1:22:38
  that, or color things that are supposed to be pink pink and things that
• 1:22:42
  are supposed to be green green, and play games like red light green light,
• 1:22:47
  where you learn rules and stuff. But so that's where this kid is.
• 1:22:55
  But they're using the word baby, and that's something else. That we
• 1:22:59
  have abandoned in today's society. When we talk about children, our whole society
• 1:23:05
  tries to make them grow up too fast. It's not just individual moms and
• 1:23:10
  dads, parents. They're wanting to throw them into school earlier. They're wanting
• 1:23:14
  to throw them into preschool earlier. They're teaching things in preschool now that you
• 1:23:17
  learned in kindergarten when I was a kid. And now you know, we're
• 1:23:25
  in a vein of educators and psychologists telling the rest of society that children should
• 1:23:30
  be making adults sexual decisions and adult sexuality decisions and adult medical decisions in elementary
• 1:23:38
  school until they're rich pubty. Yeah, and at that point it has to
• 1:23:44
  be stressed out for as long as humanly possible. We have eighteen year old
• 1:23:48
  children. People speak of such a phenomena as eighteen year old children, even
• 1:23:54
  twenty one year old children, because people are still in university at that point.
• 1:24:00
  College for some kids, yeah, and for and for some reason,
• 1:24:03
  certain factions, especially within colleges, would like to refer to those young adult
• 1:24:10
  students as children. And at the same time they're referring to toddlers as children.
• 1:24:17
  This drawing fewer and fewer distinctions, which doesn't sound like diversity to me.
• 1:24:25
  But I guess that's not the kind of diversity we're be we're being preached
• 1:24:30
  at about when when it comes to this as I mean this, this appears
• 1:24:38
  to be one of the elements of the work agenda to reduce sort of these
• 1:24:44
  transitional states until it's nothing but children and adults. Not that you can't murder
• 1:24:51
  a child when it's ten months old, Heavens Tibets. You know that should
• 1:24:56
  be up to the mother, but it's still there's they're getting rid of all
• 1:25:00
  the distinctions, of of all the of the various gray areas in the rainbow.
• 1:25:10
  And and what do you think is going to be next for the chopping
• 1:25:13
  block? Are they going to turn all children into adults or all the adults
• 1:25:15
  into children? It would I put it to your dear listener, it would
• 1:25:19
  be it would be naive not to presume that they are going to turn all
• 1:25:25
  adults into children, the same kind of child. The moment you want to
• 1:25:30
  say, the moment you come out of the womb, the moment you are
• 1:25:32
  no longer eligible to be killed by your mother, whatever age that is,
• 1:25:39
  you've become the same category of human being as as that thing rotting in that
• 1:25:45
  chair in that pod, eating insects until you die. It's you're all.
• 1:25:51
  You're all one gelastinous mass of gray matter, from from the moment the mother
• 1:26:01
  no longer owns you to the moment the state owns you. Wait, the
• 1:26:04
  state owns you as soon as you're conceived. What am I even talking about?
• 1:26:09
  Hey, I'm painting this nightmare, big brother future, as though we're
• 1:26:13
  not already living in it. Well, I mean the moment that you can
• 1:26:17
  no longer be killed by your mother, and in some places now you become
• 1:26:23
  eligible to be killed by the state, you know, and at like places
• 1:26:29
  with uh state state run in state funded medical systems where you know, it's
• 1:26:40
  they refer to it with things like single pair and all that, But it's
• 1:26:44
  basically socialized medicine where the state is your insurer, in the state is your
• 1:26:48
  broker, and the state is your decider of whether or not you're eligible for
• 1:26:54
  treatment and stuff. They're all instituting euthanasia, and they're all recommending it as
• 1:27:01
  a treatment for more and more treatable conditions that they're denying other treatments for,
• 1:27:13
  and they're getting to the point where people are in Canada now discussing making it
• 1:27:17
  mandatory for people after a certain age or with certain medical needs that that are
• 1:27:25
  expensive and things like that, that no, you can't, you can't have
• 1:27:29
  medical treatment, but we're going to make it mandatory that you you participate in
• 1:27:35
  the medical assistance and dying system. And it's it's not in the legal works
• 1:27:42
  now, but people in the medical community are talking about it and like that's
• 1:27:46
  terrifying, right, They're not just recommending it for this This condition is going
• 1:27:55
  to kill you and it's going to suck the whole time that you're dying,
• 1:27:59
  and it's going to get to a point where that that that could be considered
• 1:28:01
  torture. But before you hit that point, we can help you just go
• 1:28:06
  to sleep and die. That was that was what we were told. This
• 1:28:09
  is going to be right, But now it's well, it's too expensive to
• 1:28:13
  treat your depression, so we'll help you commit suicide. Right, it's too
• 1:28:17
  too expensive to treat your knee pain, so we'll help you commit suicide.
• 1:28:24
  Oh, you're having a rough time fitting into society because you're autistic. How
• 1:28:28
  about some suicide? All right, Like that's where it's going, That's what's
• 1:28:31
  happening, and we get told, oh, it's it's a slippery slope fallacy.
• 1:28:36
  Well, not when it's happening, right, Not when each step is
• 1:28:41
  it logically follows the previous one and there isn't some giant leap of standard changes
• 1:28:48
  and logic required to get from step to step. That's not a slippery slope
• 1:28:54
  fallacy. That's gravity doing exactly what you would predict gravity. He does,
• 1:29:00
  right, And this is something often brought up by these two let signs of
• 1:29:03
  people. Well you wouldn't define the theory of gravity, would you, Well,
• 1:29:08
  you would if if it involved a slippery slope. Well, which,
• 1:29:12
  just because people are falling in this exact trajectory of this exact acceleration doesn't mean
• 1:29:17
  they would continue to fall with this exact trajectory, with this exact acceleration.
• 1:29:23
  Yeah, yeah, it's It's not the same thing as telling somebody though,
• 1:29:30
  well just because you donate to a charity, you know they're going to come
• 1:29:32
  and take all your money. Well, no, that doesn't logically follow.
• 1:29:35
  That's not a slip. That is a slippery slope fallacy. Right. Slippery
• 1:29:39
  slope is when when you you start making up extremes and saying they're going to
• 1:29:45
  happen without any logic as to the progression of how we're going to get there,
• 1:29:49
  and it's obviously not in the works right now. This is so yeah,
• 1:29:55
  but yeah, we we have in our society, we have sort of
• 1:29:58
  tried to shut off early childhood and turn children into little adults. And you
• 1:30:06
  can't do that because they don't have the brain development. Their brains are not
• 1:30:13
  adult brains. They are children's brains, you know, right from the start,
• 1:30:17
  and you should be able to recognize it. Like if you've ever raised
• 1:30:20
  a child, there is a certain point in their life when they figure out
• 1:30:27
  that if they see something in front of them and then you move it so
• 1:30:30
  they can't see it, and you've just put it behind something, it still
• 1:30:33
  exists. And there's this little lightbulb moment where that happens before that, if
• 1:30:41
  they see something and they don't like it, and you put something in front
• 1:30:44
  of it so they can't see it anymore, they calm down because you have
• 1:30:48
  made the object no longer exist. And it's one of the reasons why Peekaboo
• 1:30:53
  is played with babies, why it's so much fun with little babies, and
• 1:30:58
  then it becomes fun with older babies because they have figured out that when you
• 1:31:02
  cover your face with your hands, your face is still there. They're not
• 1:31:05
  surprised to see your face. They've figured out the game and they enjoy it.
• 1:31:11
  Right, And that's a stage in development. Right, there's a stage
• 1:31:15
  that's odd. That's called object permanence. Right, there's a stage in your
• 1:31:19
  development where you start to understand that the way it feels when something happens to
• 1:31:29
  you, Like if you pour water on your arm and you feel wetness,
• 1:31:33
  that if you also pour water on your siblings arm, the sibling will feel
• 1:31:40
  wetness on their arm because that's what happens when you feel water. And they
• 1:31:44
  have the same spectrum of experiences as you do, and you notice that the
• 1:31:48
  other experiences things. I can't remember what that one's called, but there's a
• 1:31:56
  lightbulb moment for that too. And before that light old moment goes off,
• 1:32:00
  if one child bites another child and you say, don't do that that hurts,
• 1:32:08
  the child will think you're crazy because you just told them something hurt that
• 1:32:12
  clearly did not. They didn't feel a thing. It doesn't occur to them
• 1:32:15
  that the other person felt it. And all of those you know step by
• 1:32:20
  step bits of development. You figure out that at some point that people can
• 1:32:26
  say things that are not true, and that if you say something that doesn't
• 1:32:30
  make it real or true, and you understand pretend, Like kids learn the
• 1:32:35
  difference between reality and pretend at some point, they don't have that always.
• 1:32:41
  And if you start telling a child that they are a different sex or they
• 1:32:45
  can be a different sex before they develop the ability to understand the difference between
• 1:32:51
  what is real and what is pretend, you have just warped their development.
• 1:32:59
  Especially if you continue play acting that and never tell them that that you know
• 1:33:05
  it's it's there, you're doing something real. They may feel like they're playing
• 1:33:11
  pretend for years and get you get mad when they want to stop. Right,
• 1:33:15
  all of these things they're being taken away from children, the protections against
• 1:33:20
  exploitation of the lack of development, the protections against mistakes that can happen because
• 1:33:27
  of the lack of development. Right, So these doctors are recognizing that this
• 1:33:31
  boy needs time to be a child, a baby, a little kid who
• 1:33:40
  is still developing, and not a miniature adult. And that's that's what we've
• 1:33:45
  forgotten in psychiatry. Yeah, I was also curious about his uh, like
• 1:33:54
  he's wearing a suit. Like this little kid, what is he wearing?
• 1:33:58
  I've never seen the little kid were assume like that, But you know,
• 1:34:00
  it's a different country. Maybe you know that's how school children dress. I
• 1:34:06
  don't know, but you know, assuming that they come from a more posh
• 1:34:12
  background than that would kind of make sense. But then you look at how
• 1:34:18
  young women dress, young mothers dress their child their children. They dress them
• 1:34:27
  like miniature adults. You know. They they buy these expensive Jordans and things
• 1:34:35
  like that that look just like how their fathers and their brothers and their friends
• 1:34:42
  maybe dress when they're out on the street or whatever. Like, the kids
• 1:34:45
  don't look like kids anymore. They don't dress like kids anymore. You got
• 1:34:49
  mothers out here putting weaves in these little girls hair at such a young age.
• 1:34:57
  It's like when we don't even allow the kids to be kids anymore.
• 1:35:02
  Well, I put it to you, what if this is adults looking like
• 1:35:08
  kids? What if this is not kids dressing like adults, but adults dressing
• 1:35:12
  like kids. It's only in the sixties kids would wearing suits. Apparently that's
• 1:35:16
  what adults wear. Nowadays, adults don't wear suits. They were the same
• 1:35:20
  things as kids. Yeah, and I think I covered this in my video
• 1:35:25
  with my career, like a year ago. It's normal for children to wear
• 1:35:31
  dresses or what looked like dresses, even when they're toddlers. They just wear
• 1:35:34
  this one piece sort of dress type thing. And and then when they're little
• 1:35:40
  kids have always won short pants or little dresses and stuff, because don't one
• 1:35:45
  gives a crap if kids are running around half naked, kids would run around
• 1:35:49
  naked if they wanted to run. The most important that they be comfortable.
• 1:35:55
  Yeah, running around naked is very much a childish thing to do, a
• 1:35:58
  baby ish thing to do. And we're now at this point when a great
• 1:36:02
  deal of women are running around half naked to almost completely naked. Yeah,
• 1:36:09
  and now at this point where young men are starting to do it, but
• 1:36:13
  they also think they're women because they're doing it. Was company these things even
• 1:36:16
  more Like I say, I like what Laurens saying is true. But if
• 1:36:21
  you, if you, if you shift it out broader or further, you
• 1:36:26
  realize, no, this this this is adults dressing like children. This is
• 1:36:29
  adults a thing like children. This is adults assuming they have the agency of
• 1:36:34
  a child. This is the problem that's getting worse throughout all of society.
• 1:36:41
  Yeah, I just I remember when you know, when I was a kid,
• 1:36:45
  we did sometimes go to a daycare center because there were there were kids
• 1:36:51
  that we could play with there that that were from the other side of town.
• 1:36:55
  We had a little bit of exposure to kids from outside the neighborhood.
• 1:36:59
  And it was there was a lady from our neighborhood that was like one of
• 1:37:01
  the moms around the park. That was one of the ladies that worked at
• 1:37:04
  the daycare. So, and I can remember the way that we dressed when
• 1:37:11
  we went there. You went in clothing that was durable, flexible, and
• 1:37:18
  inexpensive because it was going to get stained like that was, and it needed
• 1:37:24
  to be safe. It needed to not like we did we had. If
• 1:37:27
  we had hoodies, they didn't have cords in them to tie under your chin,
• 1:37:30
  right. Mom sewed buttons on our hoodies. When we got older,
• 1:37:34
  we had cords in our hoodies that we could tie because we were old enough
• 1:37:36
  to untie it, right. But you had to. You dress your children
• 1:37:40
  like little kids. You don't dress them like little adults except for rare occasions
• 1:37:45
  where they get to do that. For a little while, and then like
• 1:37:48
  when I photographed weddings, I've always I always watched, little girls would tolerate
• 1:37:56
  like the princess dress for a long time, longer than little boys would tolerate
• 1:38:00
  the suit unless the suit was not made out of suit material, like if
• 1:38:05
  you put the little boy in an actual suit made out of tweed or any
• 1:38:13
  of the other materials that men's suits are made out of. Then at the
• 1:38:18
  reception, a lot of times, after the little ceremonial things that the wedding
• 1:38:25
  party would participate in, the ring bearer would come out and he'd be in
• 1:38:30
  just normal little boy clothes for the rest of the evening. And eventually,
• 1:38:33
  you know, you would see the parents of the flower girl and the ring
• 1:38:39
  bearer if they were very young, would take them home even you know,
• 1:38:43
  after like they did all that stuff first, and then they would go home
• 1:38:46
  after the cake, because kids don't have patience for stuff like that. And
• 1:38:50
  as it gets later and later, like the last few weddings that I photographed,
• 1:38:58
  you were seeing kids in these get ups that were clearly made, you
• 1:39:02
  know, to make them look like little adults, and they would wear those
• 1:39:05
  clothes for hours, and they would get worn out and they would start acting
• 1:39:09
  out, and the families would try to discipline them, and you know they
• 1:39:13
  would they would just be passed the point where they had self control over their
• 1:39:16
  behavior because they were little kids. And then they would pass out on the
• 1:39:20
  floor, and you know somebody would a grandparent usually would pick up the baby
• 1:39:27
  and sit in a chair somewhere and let the baby lay on their chest and
• 1:39:32
  sleep, because the younger generation didn't understand you can't just treat your kids like
• 1:39:39
  little accessories. You can't treat them like little adults. They have to have
• 1:39:44
  childhood. And we're gonna go a little bit further here, and then we're
• 1:39:51
  gonna stop because it's it's been about about two hours, so one more segment
• 1:39:58
  here. Maybe it's it's buffering, and we're buffering, and we're buffering the
• 1:40:08
  problem as the mother feels it. I'm trying to get at your feelings,
• 1:40:11
  and you seem to be hiding them and covering them up, because I would
• 1:40:16
  expect that you would be either very angry with your husband or very sad and
• 1:40:20
  hurts that you lost, because you said you don't like to be a loser.
• 1:40:24
  No, I don't. But what happens when you are a loser.
• 1:40:30
  Are you guys able to see this because it's telling me it's pausing. Yeah,
• 1:40:34
  it is pausing, but I can see it for a long time.
• 1:40:38
  That's what you're telling me. When I'm going buffer. Yeah, I'm gonna
• 1:40:44
  have it go over that one more time because it it's really weird. It
• 1:40:47
  keeps all right, it's now can you see the stream or does it say
• 1:40:54
  it's paused? Right? And does the stream say it's paused? It doesn't
• 1:41:00
  say it's paused. I don't see anything the video is paused. Yeah,
• 1:41:08
  I see, just like a thing at the bottom is says experiencing interruptions.
• 1:41:12
  Find out why? Yeah, that's annoying. Yeah, so let's try this
• 1:41:16
  again. What happens when you are a loser? Noah? All right.
• 1:41:24
  So what he has said is he feels that she's hiding her feelings about her
• 1:41:29
  conflict with her husband from him, that if they're having this conflict, she
• 1:41:34
  should be angry, but he's not seeing any anger. And she said she
• 1:41:40
  doesn't like to be the loser, but she's not expressing any anger over being
• 1:41:45
  the loser. And and she is like, if you watch her face,
• 1:41:50
  I'll see if I can go back she's internalizing. She's controlling her expression very
• 1:41:58
  strictly here. Oh yeah, yeah, we'll be able to solve his problems.
• 1:42:02
  Another the doctor must see the problem as the mother feels it. I'm
• 1:42:08
  trying to get at your feelings, and you seem to be hiding them and
• 1:42:11
  covering them up, because I would expect that you would be either very angry
• 1:42:16
  with your husband or very sad and hurts that you lost. Because you said
• 1:42:20
  you don't like to be a loser. No, I don't, But what
• 1:42:24
  happens when you are a loser, Because here is a situation where you are
• 1:42:30
  a loser. You've been a loser with your six year old child for a
• 1:42:32
  long time, that's what you're telling me. All right, So did you
• 1:42:38
  guys, did you guys get to hear that it kept doing the pausing thing.
• 1:42:44
  Yeah, it's it's like it's it's been. It's being ridiculous right now.
• 1:42:50
  Let me see if I can switch back to I might not be able
• 1:42:56
  to to continue, gosh, trying it. Every time I try to deal
• 1:43:01
  with this, it mmm. I don't want to go back to using psy
• 1:43:11
  tube because psy tube isn't reliable, but I might. I mean to end
• 1:43:20
  up having to do that if this doesn't work. But in the meantime,
• 1:43:27
  like that's that's the thing, Like she's not dealing with how she feels about
• 1:43:30
  this, And I don't know. Can you see the paused expression it's on
• 1:43:35
  right now, she's definitely angry. I don't I don't see her. You
• 1:43:43
  don't see her. What do you see? I see the second doctor that's
• 1:43:46
  talking about the child. Okay, that means it never got to all right,
• 1:43:53
  never got to the point. We're just gonna have to. I'll I'll
• 1:43:56
  figure something out for next week and we'll we'll continue with it next week,
• 1:44:02
  because I just don't think it's gonna I don't understand why, all of a
• 1:44:05
  sudden this week it my computer won't run this properly, because it's not like
• 1:44:13
  I did anything different this week than I did last week. I'm not I
• 1:44:19
  don't have anything else running. I shouldn't be downloading an update because I updated
• 1:44:26
  a couple of hours ago. But we'll just leave it at that. Let
• 1:44:30
  me see if there's any more Super Choose or super chests. There's I think
• 1:44:33
  there's one more. I don't know if I read the last super chest.
• 1:44:36
  Let me sneak up here and take a look. I think I think she
• 1:44:41
  is not willing to confront the husband because she knows that he's paying for everything,
• 1:44:47
  you know what I mean. She she I don't think she works.
• 1:44:51
  She I'm pretty sure she does it. You know, she doesn't want to
• 1:44:55
  upset the apple card, you know, she That's what she says. She
• 1:44:58
  doesn't want to be the loser. Yeah. Well, yeah, the one
• 1:45:01
  that's losing is your son and you and your your husband, because you're you're
• 1:45:06
  losing out on the best part of having a child, which is I can
• 1:45:14
  only assume it's you know, the interaction, the the fun of raising a
• 1:45:19
  child and teaching him and showing him that things, you know, And there
• 1:45:26
  she's constantly feeling like she has to be the disciplinarian because her husband isn't really
• 1:45:30
  stepping up to the plate. But what's she going to do? What is
• 1:45:35
  what? What are her other options? Leave the situation and take the child
• 1:45:42
  and support him how and then she still has to deal with a child who
• 1:45:45
  is insubordinate, and you know, it's still all on her shoulders. So
• 1:45:51
  that's why I think she feels like it's a lose lose situation. Yeah.
• 1:45:56
  Well, and there's something else that's going on here, And I don't know.
• 1:45:59
  I can't remember from the last time I watched this at the psychiatrists get
• 1:46:02
  into it or not. But this is an issue that has existed with women
• 1:46:10
  for as long as feminism has convinced women to abandon the standard of partnership and
• 1:46:18
  hierarchy within a marriage. And that is, the woman decides where the plate
• 1:46:27
  is and then expects the husband to step up to it without being consulted as
• 1:46:31
  as to his views about where the plate should be right right, And that's
• 1:46:35
  a problem, like it's it's it's that's not how it should work when you
• 1:46:42
  get and I like, I give a lot of marital advice and people are
• 1:46:45
  like, well, what makes you an expert, Well, I've been I've
• 1:46:46
  been married for twenty it'll be if we count just the legal marriage, it's
• 1:46:57
  like twenty three years. But if we we go beyond that, it's been
• 1:47:00
  it's twenty four years this November. So well, actually, no, it
• 1:47:09
  would be longer than that because our son was three when we got legally married.
• 1:47:16
  But H and I differentiate from between the two because you you can dedicate
• 1:47:21
  yourself to somebody without telling the government a government can keep its nos out of
• 1:47:26
  your business. But you know, we we got legal legally married for a
• 1:47:30
  number of reasons, including if if something happens to my husband and I go
• 1:47:38
  to the hospital to be with him and make sure they're taking good care of
• 1:47:42
  him, they don't have to let me in if our marriage isn't legal,
• 1:47:46
  Yeah, because they can they can limit it to family, and if he's
• 1:47:50
  conscious, he can say no, I want my wife to be here.
• 1:47:55
  But if he's not, then they don't have to let me in and I
• 1:47:59
  can't make decisions for him or anything. So like we got legally married.
• 1:48:04
  It's it's a rough thing because men are in a position where they can't be
• 1:48:12
  sure that a woman is trustworthy enough to never take advantage of the legal system
• 1:48:16
  that they can abuse to hurt a husband on the way out of a marriage.
• 1:48:23
  But if a man wants to have a committed relationship with a woman,
• 1:48:28
  he loses out on those things if he doesn't get legally married. If he
• 1:48:32
  does get legally married, he becomes even more vulnerable to that system than if
• 1:48:36
  he just cohabitates. So it's a really rotten situation obviously needs to be fixed,
• 1:48:42
  and I don't necessarily recommend cohabitating unmarried or getting getting married because of that,
• 1:48:49
  Like you really have to be certain long engagements should be a thing for
• 1:48:55
  that very reason. But in any case, like you know, we've had
• 1:49:00
  a long, successful relationship and we've been through hardship in terms of how your
• 1:49:08
  relationship functions. We've our relationship has been attacked from multiple sides for years,
• 1:49:15
  and we just weather it, you know, together as a team. And
• 1:49:19
  so when I give marital advice, I'm giving marital advice based on that.
• 1:49:24
  I'm getting marital advice based on having learned how to have a relationship from family
• 1:49:30
  members who celebrated their fiftieth anniversaries and their seventy fifth anniversaries, who stayed close
• 1:49:35
  even when one of them became senile, who weathered you know who, who
• 1:49:42
  lived in sickness and in health for rich or for poorer. We've we've lived
• 1:49:47
  for poorer. Uh, I guess we're less poor now. We're we're not
• 1:49:51
  we're not rich, but we're comfortable enough to you know, not be scared
• 1:49:57
  that that we're going to be homeless next week. And so yeah, when
• 1:50:01
  I give that kind of advice, it's coming from somebody who has experience.
• 1:50:08
  So no, I'm not a schooled relationship expert. I have life experience,
• 1:50:15
  and I think that sometimes is better. But yeah, this thing of setting
• 1:50:21
  the bar, your husband has to meet this standard and you're going to make
• 1:50:26
  that's. Women doing that with housework now is part of the reason why women
• 1:50:30
  are initiating seventy percent of divorce, right. Women setting that doing that with
• 1:50:38
  child rearing is part of the reason that they later claim that their husband didn't
• 1:50:43
  do any of the caregiving. And uh, you know, women women doing
• 1:50:47
  that with their standard of living is part of the reason that their husbands are
• 1:50:54
  working themselves to death. See Telomera gave us one hundred dollars super chat,
• 1:51:04
  thank you very much for that, and says a clinical psychologist has to have
• 1:51:11
  a PhD, which means you have to study psycho psychology for four years a
• 1:51:15
  bachelor's, then do a master's about one year, then do a PhD four
• 1:51:23
  years again usually more so that's a minimum of nine years. Right, so
• 1:51:29
  it's a total of nine to ten years after all of this. It's very
• 1:51:32
  common for people to recommend trying several different clinical psychologists before finding the one that
• 1:51:38
  can help you. And that's that's true because it's a it's a matter of
• 1:51:45
  you're you're not just looking at an engine and taking it apart. And you
• 1:51:53
  can't just look at a diagram and say, all right, this is how
• 1:51:56
  this gets put together, and everything you're you're whistling in the dark a lot
• 1:52:00
  of times. In terms of the causes and effects and people's behavior, the
• 1:52:06
  same behavior can have a whole host of causes and effects, and the psychiatrist
• 1:52:14
  being able to ascertain the patients causes and effects and needs and pathway to healing,
• 1:52:23
  and everything is reliant on them being able to build a rapport and have
• 1:52:29
  effective communication with each other, and the patient being willing to accept the psychiatrist's
• 1:52:38
  advice and so on. And so if you don't click with a psychiatrist,
• 1:52:45
  if you go in and you talk to somebody and you feel like they're not
• 1:52:47
  listening to you, or you don't feel like you have it in you to
• 1:52:51
  listen to them, you move on to the next one. You know,
• 1:52:55
  if you feel like you feel a sense of prejudice. This person thinks I'm
• 1:53:00
  toxic because I'm a man. This person thinks I'm not very smart because i'm
• 1:53:05
  this ethnic background, or this religious upbringing or whatever. Then you move on,
• 1:53:12
  and if the psychiatrist doesn't feel like you're communicating with them effectively, they'll
• 1:53:17
  have to talk to you about that as well, and might suggest you know
• 1:53:20
  your style of communication and your needs. I have a colleague that works very
• 1:53:27
  well with people who communicate like you and I unfortunately don't have the same skill,
• 1:53:33
  and I think that you would be better working with him or her.
• 1:53:36
  And it takes a very strong professional to do that, and I've seen that
• 1:53:41
  happen with other doctors too, right, But but you know, so there's
• 1:53:45
  a big difference there between that and being like a car mechanic or the example
• 1:53:48
  that Tellmannar gives here. After all this, it's very common. Imagine if
• 1:53:55
  plumber's trained for about a decade before being allowed to work, and then people
• 1:53:58
  thought it was normal to try out before you find one who can do the
• 1:54:00
  job. I realized people are more complex than pipes, but that still seems
• 1:54:04
  like a sad state of affairs for that profession. Adding on that so many
• 1:54:10
  articles are coming out about how they are being trained to assume that men have
• 1:54:13
  toxic masculinity. Anyone who hears about that and then goes looking for information on
• 1:54:17
  what toxic masculinity means, will stumble onto a mess of contradictions, and I
• 1:54:23
  can explain that one to you too. The toxic masculinity narrative in psychology was
• 1:54:31
  written by a trans woman who had not transitioned yet hadn't actually discovered she was
• 1:54:40
  trans at the time. So while she was living as a man, and
• 1:54:47
  her name is Rao and Connell, she went by Robert Connell at the time,
• 1:54:55
  and so she was in the throes of gender dysphoria, during which masculinity
• 1:55:00
  would seem like a prison. And what she studied was the masculine how masculinity
• 1:55:11
  develops if maturity never develops in a guy, or in environments where a guy
• 1:55:19
  is not allowed to develop naturally and his maturity is stunted or disrupted and treated
• 1:55:27
  that as a form of masculinity and not a form of dysfunction. Well,
• 1:55:32
  those same dysfunctional characteristics happen in women if their maturity is disrupted. They become
• 1:55:41
  aggressive, they become uncommunicative, they don't deal with their feelings, they don't
• 1:55:45
  deal with their their differences with other people, and so on either. So
• 1:55:50
  it's not gendered, but she gendered it and She sort of copied off of
• 1:55:59
  the idea of cultural hegemony or hegemony and used hegemonic masculinity meaning what the culture,
• 1:56:12
  the culture wide idea of masculinity is, and sort of went from there
• 1:56:18
  to this dysfunction is expected of men, and in some environments and dysfunctional environments
• 1:56:28
  it can be. But she generalized it to all men and all cultural environments
• 1:56:34
  in Western culture, and that's where the problem comes in. She basically decided
• 1:56:42
  to pathologize healthy, normal masculinity along with unhealthy expressions of aspects of normal masculinity
• 1:56:51
  under conditions that don't merit the same approach he goes on. This will most
• 1:57:01
  likely cause him to either becomes sincerely confused, since most people broadly believe that
• 1:57:05
  feminist concepts like toxic masculinity to describe real things, or pissed off and distrusting
• 1:57:11
  a psychology if they figure out that toxic masculinity has no strict definition but is
• 1:57:18
  vary from person to person. I've seen different feminists use drastically different definitions of
• 1:57:24
  the term in the same thread during discussions. In fact, the closest I
• 1:57:29
  can come to a good definition is things I don't like, Yeah, and
• 1:57:32
  that's when you talk to feminist layman, they do that all the time,
• 1:57:36
  and in fact, the same feminist will use drastically definitions different definitions in the
• 1:57:43
  same thread of discussion. They're probably going to be very unhelpful since men will
• 1:57:49
  become distrustful of it and avoid it or try to do it and become a
• 1:57:53
  neurotic message who are trying to please women by becoming doormats and center their morals
• 1:57:58
  on what do women life accept Different women like very different things and sometimes say
• 1:58:02
  they like one thing but really like another. So this will help set men
• 1:58:08
  up for a very bad life and probably not help them solve any real problems
• 1:58:12
  they might be having. And that's all true. It is though, best
• 1:58:16
  when you're looking for a psychologist to start looking within the men's issues community and
• 1:58:24
  somewhat, although not always, like if you have a religious faith, going
• 1:58:31
  to your clergy can help you with questions that have some morality attached to them.
• 1:58:36
  Just don't try to substitute morality for evaluation of your own psychological development in
• 1:58:45
  terms of maturity and that the health of your self expression, because sometimes those
• 1:58:54
  two things are not even on the same page, right, Like the moral
• 1:59:00
  reality of being prone to disloyalty in a relationship versus what psychological problem do you
• 1:59:10
  have that makes you feel that way and how do you address it? Because
• 1:59:15
  the morality is it comes into well, just don't do that, it's a
• 1:59:19
  sin, right, But the psychology of it is, why do I want
• 1:59:24
  to do that? Is something wrong that I could address that would make me
• 1:59:28
  not want to do that? And that's that's your church might not help you
• 1:59:33
  with that. But if you go to a psychologist that just wants to tell
• 1:59:39
  you your masculinity is toxic, they're not going to help you with it either.
• 1:59:43
  So I don't know that that was a great super chat. It had
• 1:59:46
  a lot of things to say in it, and the point about the difference
• 1:59:55
  between psychology and other professions where you go to school for a long time very
• 2:00:00
  valid. It would be rough to become a psychologist and then to have them
• 2:00:03
  teach you things that are not useful for the patient. That that makes it
• 2:00:08
  really that really screws up a profession. And yeah, Maroon Riberic says,
• 2:00:18
  I knew some presue majored in psychology. I knew some ministers who did too.
• 2:00:23
  Back in the day before it was all full of feminism and that can
• 2:00:28
  be helpful too, But that's all those super chows and this is all the
• 2:00:32
  super chats. And let me go back to rumble. I want to look
• 2:00:36
  one more time and make sure I'm not missing any rumble rants. Okay,
• 2:00:49
  that is not a rumble rant. I think that's an ad for a rumble
• 2:00:53
  rant. It says HB Radio one dollar your rant here, So that's just
• 2:00:58
  the there's no other It doesn't show any other rumble rants here, So that's
• 2:01:02
  it. I will figure out the technical issue with this stupid video thing in
• 2:01:10
  the next couple of weeks. Next week we are not coming back to the
• 2:01:14
  video. We're going to have on prim Reaper on the fifth, and there's
• 2:01:21
  a there's another article that I had sent to her that we're going to take
• 2:01:26
  a look at instead for that week, so you guys can look forward to
• 2:01:30
  that and I will shut the show down and we'll be going into I'll show
• 2:01:36
  you the article, all right, come on, there we go. Is
• 2:01:42
  girl math really helping girls? And this is a Refinery twenty nine article,
• 2:01:46
  so it's going to be an interesting thing. So if you if you you
• 2:01:53
  have to come to the after show to find out. God, yeah,
• 2:02:00
  so if you go to Honey Badger Brigade dot com or feed the Badger dot
• 2:02:04
  com. You can you can look through the menus there and find out how
• 2:02:08
  to become a Badger and join us in our aftershows. There's one level at
• 2:02:15
  which you can just watch the aftershows, and there's another level at which you
• 2:02:18
  can participate in the chat in the aftershow and actually participate in the verbal conversation
• 2:02:25
  in the in the aftershow. So take a look there. Go to go
• 2:02:30
  to uh, Honey Badger Brigade dot com, go to feed the Badger dot
• 2:02:33
  com and take a look so that you can you can join us in discussing
• 2:02:40
  these hard hitting issues like girl math. I try to find us something to
• 2:02:46
  get to sound off about and laugh about for these these aftershows as much as
• 2:02:51
  I can. Uh, And there you go. So I'll thank everybody for
• 2:02:56
  listening this. Like I said, this is a this is a weird subject
• 2:02:59
  because it's an old psychology video, but I think it's useful to us to
• 2:03:03
  look back and see the difference between how boys were treated then versus how they're
• 2:03:09
  treated now. Thanks for me too, co host for sticking out the long
• 2:03:12
  sausage here, and thanks everybody who works in the background for to make HBr
• 2:03:17
  talk happened, and good night all