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The Shuttle Chapter 12 - Ughtred · The Frances Hodgson Burnett Library

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  Speaker 1: Chapter 12 of The Shuttle. This LibriVox recording is in
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  Speaker 1: the public domain. The Shuttle by Frances Hodgson Burnett. Chapter 12. Utrid.
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  Speaker 1: Bettina stood alone in her bedroom a couple of hours later.
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  Speaker 1: Lady Anstruthers had taken her to it, preparing her for
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  Speaker 1: its limitations by explaining that she would find it quite
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  Speaker 1: different from her room in New York. She had been
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  Speaker 1: pathetically nervous and flushed about it, and Bettina had also
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  Speaker 1: been aware that the apartment itself had been hastily, and
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  Speaker 1: with much moving of objects from one chamber to another,
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  Speaker 1: made ready for her. The room was large and square
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  Speaker 1: and low, it was panelled in small squares of white wood.
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  Speaker 1: The panels were old enough to be cracked here and there,
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  Speaker 1: and the paint was stained and yellow with time, where
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  Speaker 1: it was not knocked or worn off. There was a
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  Speaker 1: small paned leaded window which filled a large part of
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  Speaker 1: one side of the room, and its deep seat was
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  Speaker 1: an agreeable feature. sitting in it one looked out over
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  Speaker 1: several red-walled gardens and through breaks in the trees of
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  Speaker 1: the park to a fair beyond bettina stood before this
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  Speaker 1: window for a few moments and then took a seat
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  Speaker 1: in the embrasure that she might gaze out and reflect
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  Speaker 1: at leisure her genius as has before been mentioned was
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  Speaker 1: the genius for living for being vital many people merely
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  Speaker 1: exist are kept alive by others or continue to vegetate
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  Speaker 1: because the persistent action of normal functions will allow of
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  Speaker 1: their doing no less Bettina Vanderpool had lived vividly, and
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  Speaker 1: in the midst of a self-created atmosphere of action, from
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  Speaker 1: her first hour. It was not possible for her to
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  Speaker 1: be one of the horde of mere spectators. Wheresoever she moved,
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  Speaker 1: there was some occult stirring of the mental and even
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  Speaker 1: physical air. Her pulses beat too strongly, her blood ran
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  Speaker 1: too fast to allow of inaction of mind or body.
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  Speaker 1: When in passing through the village she had seen the
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  Speaker 1: broken windows and the hanging palings of the cottagers, It
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  Speaker 1: had been inevitable that at once she should in thought
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  Speaker 1: prepare them, set them straight. Disorder filled her with a
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  Speaker 1: sort of impatience which was akin to physical distress. If
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  Speaker 1: she had been born a poor woman she would have
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  Speaker 1: worked hard for her living, and found an interest almost
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  Speaker 1: in exhilaration in her labour. Such gifts as she had
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  Speaker 1: would have been applied to the tasks she undertook. It
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  Speaker 1: had frequently given her pleasure to imagine herself earning her
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  Speaker 1: livelihood as a seamstress, a housemaid, a nurse. She knew
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  Speaker 1: what she could have put into her service, and how
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  Speaker 1: she could have found it absorbing. Imagination and initiative could
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  Speaker 1: make any service absorbing. The actual truth was that if
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  Speaker 1: she had been a housemaid, the room she set in
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  Speaker 1: order would have taken a character under her touch. If
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  Speaker 1: she had been a seamstress, her work would have been
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  Speaker 1: swiftly done, her imagination would have invented for her combinations
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  Speaker 1: of form and colour. If she had been a nursemaid,
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  Speaker 1: the children under her care would never have been sufficiently
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  Speaker 1: bored to become tiresome or intractable, and they also would
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  Speaker 1: have gained character, to which would have been added an
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  Speaker 1: undeniable vividness of outlook. She could not have left them alone,
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  Speaker 1: so to speak. In obeying the mere laws of her being,
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  Speaker 1: she would have stimulated them. Unconsciously she had stimulated her
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  Speaker 1: fellow pupils at school. When she was his companion, her
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  Speaker 1: father had always felt himself stirred to interest and enterprise.
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  Speaker 1: You are to have been a man, Betty, he used
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  Speaker 1: to say to her sometimes. But Betty had not agreed
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  Speaker 1: with him. You say that, she once replied to him, because,
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  Speaker 1: you see, I am inclined to do things to change them,
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  Speaker 1: if they need changing. Well, one is either born like that,
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  Speaker 1: or one is not. Sometimes I think that perhaps the
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  Speaker 1: people who must act are of a distinct race. A
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  Speaker 1: kind of vigorous restlessness drives them. I remember that when
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  Speaker 1: I was a child I could not see a pin
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  Speaker 1: lying upon the ground without picking it up. or pass
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  Speaker 1: a drawer which needed closing without giving it a push,
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  Speaker 1: but there has always been as much for women to
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  Speaker 1: do as for men. There was much to be done
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  Speaker 1: here of one sort of thing and another. That was certain.
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  Speaker 1: As she gazed through the small panes of her large windows,
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  Speaker 1: she found herself overlooking part of a wilderness of a
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  Speaker 1: garden which revealed itself through an arch in an overgrown
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  Speaker 1: laurel hedge. She had glimpses of unkempt grass paths and
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  Speaker 1: unclipped topiary work which had lost its original form. Among
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  Speaker 1: a tangle of weeds rose the heads of clumps of daffodils,
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  Speaker 1: stirred by a passing wind of spring. In the park
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  Speaker 1: beyond a cuckoo was calling. She was conscious both of
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  Speaker 1: the forlorn beauty and significance of the neglected garden, and
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  Speaker 1: of the clear quaintness of the cuckoo call as she
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  Speaker 1: thought of other things. Her spirit and her health are broken,
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  Speaker 1: was her summing up. Her prettiness has faded to a rag.
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  Speaker 1: She is as nervous as an ill-treated child. She has
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  Speaker 1: lost her wits. I do not know where to begin
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  Speaker 1: with her. I must let her tell me things as
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  Speaker 1: gradually as she chooses. Until I see Nigel, I shall
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  Speaker 1: not know what his method with her has been. She
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  Speaker 1: looks as if she had ceased to care for things,
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  Speaker 1: even for herself. What shall I write to mother?' She
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  Speaker 1: knew what she would write to her father. With him
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  Speaker 1: she could be explicit. She could record what she had
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  Speaker 1: found and what it suggested to her. She could also
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  Speaker 1: make clear her reason for hesitance and deliberation. His discretion
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  Speaker 1: and affection would comprehend the thing which she herself felt,
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  Speaker 1: and which affection not combined with discretion might not take in.
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  Speaker 1: He would understand, when she told him that one of
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  Speaker 1: the first things which had struck her had been that
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  Speaker 1: Rosie herself, her helplessness and timidity, might for a period
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  Speaker 1: at least form obstacles in their path of action. He
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  Speaker 1: not only loved Rosie, but realised how slight a sweet
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  Speaker 1: thing she had always been, and he would know how
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  Speaker 1: far a slight creature's gentleness might be overpowered and beaten down.
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  Speaker 1: There was so much that her mother must be spared,
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  Speaker 1: there was indeed so little that it would be wise
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  Speaker 1: to tell her, that Bettina sat gently rubbing her forehead
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  Speaker 1: as she thought of it. The truth was that she
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  Speaker 1: must tell her nothing until all was over, accomplished, decided.
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  Speaker 1: Whatsoever there was to be over, whatsoever the action finally taken,
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  Speaker 1: must be a matter lying as far as possible between
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  Speaker 1: her father and herself. Mrs. Vanderpool's trouble would be too keen,
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  Speaker 1: her anxiety too great to keep to herself, even if
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  Speaker 1: she were not overwhelmed by them. She must be told
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  Speaker 1: of the beauties and dimensions of Stornham, all relatable details
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  Speaker 1: of Rosie's life must be generously dwelt on, Above all,
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  Speaker 1: Rosie must be made to write letters, and with an
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  Speaker 1: air of freedom, however specious. A knock on the door
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  Speaker 1: broke the thread of her reflection. It was a low-sounding knock,
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  Speaker 1: and she answered the summons herself, because she thought it
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  Speaker 1: might be Rosie's. It was not Lady Anstruthers who stood outside,
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  Speaker 1: but Uhtred, who balanced himself on his crutches, and lifted
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  Speaker 1: his small, too mature face. may i come in he
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  Speaker 1: asked here was the unexpected again but she did not
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  Speaker 1: allow him to see her surprise yes she said certainly
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  Speaker 1: you may he swung in and then turned to speak
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  Speaker 1: to her please shut the door and lock it he
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  Speaker 1: said there was sudden illumination in this but of an
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  Speaker 1: order almost whimsical that modern people in modern days should
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  Speaker 1: feel bolts and bars a necessity of ordinary intercourse was
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  Speaker 1: suggestive she was plainly about to receive enlightenment She turned
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  Speaker 1: the key and followed the halting figure across the room.'
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  Speaker 1: What are you afraid of?' she asked.' When Mother and
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  Speaker 1: I talk things over,' he said,' we always do it
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  Speaker 1: where no one can see or hear. It's the only
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  Speaker 1: way to be safe.'' Safe from what?' His eyes fixed
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  Speaker 1: themselves on her as he answered her almost sullenly.' Safe
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  Speaker 1: from people who might listen and go and tell that
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  Speaker 1: we had been talking.' In his thwarted-looking, odd child-face there
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  Speaker 1: was a shade of appeal not wholly hidden by his
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  Speaker 1: evident wish not to be boy-like. Betty felt a desire
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  Speaker 1: to kneel down suddenly and embrace him, but she knew
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  Speaker 1: he was not prepared for such a demonstration. He looked
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  Speaker 1: like a creature who had lived continually at bay, and
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  Speaker 1: had learned to adjust himself to any situation with caution
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  Speaker 1: and restraint.' Sit down, Utred,' she said, and when he
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  Speaker 1: did so she herself sat down, but not too near him.
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  Speaker 1: Resting his chin on the handle of a crutch, he
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  Speaker 1: gazed at her almost protestingly.' I always have to do
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  Speaker 1: these things,' he said,' and I am not clever enough
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  Speaker 1: or old enough. I am only eleven.' The mention of
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  Speaker 1: the number of his years was plainly not apologetic, but
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  Speaker 1: was a mere statement of his limitations. There the fact was,
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  Speaker 1: and he must make the best of it he could.'
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  Speaker 1: What things do you mean?'' Trying to make things easier,
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  Speaker 1: explaining things when she cannot think of excuses.' TODAY IT
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  Speaker 1: IS TELLING YOU WHAT SHE IS TOO FRIGHTENED TO TELL
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  Speaker 1: YOU HERSELF. I SAID TO HER THAT YOU MUST BE TOLD.
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  Speaker 1: IT MADE HER NERVOUS AND MISERABLE, BUT I KNEW YOU MUST.'' Yes,
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  Speaker 1: I must,' Betty answered.' I am glad she has you
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  Speaker 1: to depend on, Udrid.' His crutch crated on the floor,
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  Speaker 1: and his boy eyes forbade her to believe that their
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  Speaker 1: sudden lustre was in any way connected with restrained emotion.'
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  Speaker 1: I know I seem queer and like a little old man,'
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  Speaker 1: he said.' Mother cries about it sometimes.' but it can't
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  Speaker 1: be helped. It's because she has never had anyone but
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  Speaker 1: me to help her. When I was very little, I
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  Speaker 1: found out how frightened and miserable she was. After his rages,
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  Speaker 1: he used no name, she used to run away into
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  Speaker 1: my nursery and snatch me up in her arms and
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  Speaker 1: hide her face in my pinafore. Sometimes she stuffed it
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  Speaker 1: into her mouth and bit it to keep herself from screaming. Once,
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  Speaker 1: before I was seven, I ran into their room and
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  Speaker 1: shouted out and tried to fight for her. He was
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  Speaker 1: going out and had his riding-whip in his hand, and
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  Speaker 1: he caught hold of me and struck me with it
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  Speaker 1: until he was tired. Betty stood upright.' What, what, what?'
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  Speaker 1: she cried out. He merely nodded his head shortly. She
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  Speaker 1: saw what the thing had been by the way his
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  Speaker 1: face lost colour.' Of course he said it was because
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  Speaker 1: I was impotent and needed punishment,' he said.' He said
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  Speaker 1: she had encouraged me in American impudence. It was worse
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  Speaker 1: for her than for me.' She kneeled down and screamed
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  Speaker 1: out as if she was crazy, that she would give
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  Speaker 1: him what he wanted if he would stop. Wait, said Betty,
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  Speaker 1: drawing in her breath sharply. He is Sir Nigel, and
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  Speaker 1: he wanted something? He nodded again. Tell me, she demanded,
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  Speaker 1: has he ever struck her? Once, he answered slowly, before
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  Speaker 1: I was born, he struck her and she fell against something.
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  Speaker 1: That is why I am like this, and he touched
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  Speaker 1: his shoulder. The feeling which surged through Betty Vanderpool's being
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  Speaker 1: forced her to go and stand with her face turned
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  Speaker 1: toward the windows, her hands holding each other tightly behind
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  Speaker 1: her back. I must keep still, she said. I must
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  Speaker 1: make myself keep still. She spoke unconsciously, half aloud, and
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  Speaker 1: Uhtred heard her and replied hurriedly,' Yes,' he said.' You
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  Speaker 1: must make yourself keep still.' That is what we have
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  Speaker 1: to do, whatever happens.' That is one of the things
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  Speaker 1: Mother wanted you to know.' She' s afraid. She daren't let
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  Speaker 1: you—' She turned from the window, standing at her full
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  Speaker 1: height and looking very tall for a girl.' She is afraid.
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  Speaker 1: She daren't.' See, that will come to an end now.'
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  Speaker 1: There are things which can be done.' He flushed nervously.'
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  Speaker 1: That is what she was afraid you would say.' He
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  Speaker 1: spoke fast, and his hands trembled. She is nearly wild
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  Speaker 1: about it, because she knows he will try to do
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  Speaker 1: something that will make you feel as if she does
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  Speaker 1: not want you.'' She is afraid of that?' Betty exclaimed.'
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  Speaker 1: He' d do it, he'd do it, if you did not
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  Speaker 1: know beforehand.'' Oh!' said Betty, with unflinching clearness.' He' s a liar,
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  Speaker 1: is he?' The helpless rage in the unchildish eyes, the
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  Speaker 1: shaking voice as he cried out in answer, were a shock.
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  Speaker 1: It was as if he wildly rejoiced that she had
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  Speaker 1: spoken the word.' Yes, he's a liar, a liar,' he shrilled.'
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  Speaker 1: He' s a liar and a bully and a coward.' He' d
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  Speaker 1: be a murderer if he dared, but he daren't.' And
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  Speaker 1: his face dropped on his arms, folded on his crutch,
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  Speaker 1: and he broke into a passion of crying. Then Betty
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  Speaker 1: knew she must go to him. She went and knelt
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  Speaker 1: down and put her arm around him.' Utridge,' he said,'
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  Speaker 1: cry if you like. I should do it if I
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  Speaker 1: were you.' but I tell you it can all be altered,
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  Speaker 1: and it shall be. He seemed quite like a little
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  Speaker 1: boy when he put out his hand to hers and
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  Speaker 1: spoke sobbingly. She says that because you have only just
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  Speaker 1: come from America, and in America people can do things,
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  Speaker 1: you will think you can do things here, and you
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  Speaker 1: don't know. He will tell lies about you, lies you
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  Speaker 1: can't bear. She sat wringing her hands when she thought
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  Speaker 1: of it. She won't let you be hurt because you
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  Speaker 1: want to help her. he stopped abruptly and clutched her
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  Speaker 1: shoulder aunt betty aunt betty whatever happens whatever he makes
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  Speaker 1: her seem like you are to know that it is
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  Speaker 1: not true now you have come now she has seen
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  Speaker 1: you it would kill her if you were driven away
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  Speaker 1: and thought she wanted you to go i shall not
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  Speaker 1: think that she answered slowly because she realized that it
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  Speaker 1: was well that she had been warned in time Are
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  Speaker 1: you trying to tell me that above all things I
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  Speaker 1: must not let him think that I came here to
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  Speaker 1: help you, because if he is angry he will make
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  Speaker 1: us all suffer, and your mother most of all? He'll
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  Speaker 1: find a way, we always know he will. He would
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  Speaker 1: either be so rude that you would not stay here,
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  Speaker 1: or he would make mother seem rude, or he would
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  Speaker 1: write lies to grandfather. Aunt Betty, she scarcely believes you
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  Speaker 1: are real yet. If she won't tell you things at first,
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  Speaker 1: please don't mind. He looked quite like a child again,
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  Speaker 1: in his appeal to her to try to understand a
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  Speaker 1: state of affairs so complicated. Could you wait until you
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  Speaker 1: have let her get used to you?'' Used to thinking
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  Speaker 1: that there may be someone in the world to help her?' Slowly.' Yes,
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  Speaker 1: I will. Has anyone ever tried to help her?' Once
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  Speaker 1: or twice people found out and were sorry at first,
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  Speaker 1: but it only made it worse because he made them
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  Speaker 1: believe things.'' I shall not try, Uhtred,' said Betty, a
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  Speaker 1: remote spark kindling in the deeps of the pupils of
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  Speaker 1: her steel-blue eyes.' I shall not try. Now I am
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  Speaker 1: going to ask you some questions.' Before he left her
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  Speaker 1: she had asked many questions which were pertinent and searching,
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  Speaker 1: and she had learned things she realised she could have
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  Speaker 1: learned in no other way and from no other person.
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  Speaker 1: but for his uncanny sense of the responsibility he clearly
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  Speaker 1: had assumed in the days when he wore pinafores, and
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  Speaker 1: which had brought him to her room to prepare her
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  Speaker 1: mind for what she would find herself confronted with in
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  Speaker 1: the way of apparently unexplainable obstacles, there was a strong
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  Speaker 1: likelihood that at the outset she might have found herself
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  Speaker 1: more than once dangerously at a loss. Yes, she would
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  Speaker 1: have been at a loss, puzzled, perhaps greatly discouraged. She
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  Speaker 1: was face to face with a complication so extraordinary. that
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  Speaker 1: one man, through a mere persistent steadiness in evil temper
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  Speaker 1: and domestic tyranny, should have so broken the creatures of
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  Speaker 1: his household into abject submission and hopelessness, seemed too incredible.
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  Speaker 1: Such a power appeared as remote from civilized existence in
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  Speaker 1: London and New York as did that which had inflicted
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  Speaker 1: tortures in the dungeons of castles of old. Prisoners in
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  Speaker 1: such dungeons could utter no cry which could reach the
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  Speaker 1: outside world, The prisoners at Stornham Court, not four hours
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  Speaker 1: from Hyde Park Corner, could utter none the world could
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  Speaker 1: hear or comprehend if it heard it. Sheer lack of
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  Speaker 1: power to resist bound them hand and foot, and she,
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  Speaker 1: Betty Vanderpool, was here upon the spot, and as far
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  Speaker 1: as she could understand was being implored to take no steps,
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  Speaker 1: to do nothing. The atmosphere in which she had spent
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  Speaker 1: her life, the world she had been born into, had
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  Speaker 1: not made for fearfulness that one would be at any
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  Speaker 1: time defenceless against circumstances— and be obliged to submit to outrage.
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  Speaker 1: To be a Vanderpool was, it is true, to be
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  Speaker 1: a shining mark for envious for admiration, but the fact
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  Speaker 1: removed obstacles as a rule, and to find oneself standing
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  Speaker 1: before a situation with one's hands figuratively speaking tied, was
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  Speaker 1: new enough to arouse unusual sensations. She recalled with an
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  Speaker 1: ironic sense of bewilderment as a sort of material evidence
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  Speaker 1: of her own reality, the fact that not a week
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  Speaker 1: ago she had stepped onto English soil from the gangway
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  Speaker 1: of a solid Atlantic liner. It aided her to resist
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  Speaker 1: the feeling that she had been swept back into the
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  Speaker 1: Middle Ages.' When he is angry,' was one of the
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  Speaker 1: first questions she put to Uhtred,' what does he give
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  Speaker 1: us his reason? He must profess to have a reason.'
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  Speaker 1: When he gets in a rage, he says it's because
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  Speaker 1: mother is silly and common,' and I am badly brought up.'
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  Speaker 1: But we always know he wants money.' and it makes
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  Speaker 1: him furious. He could kill us with rage.'' Oh,' said Betty,'
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  Speaker 1: I see.' It began that time when he struck her.
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  Speaker 1: He said then that it was not decent that a
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  Speaker 1: woman who was married should keep her own money. He
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: made her give him almost everything she had, but she
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  Speaker 1: wants to keep some for me. He tries to make
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  Speaker 1: her get more from Grandfather, but she will not write
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  Speaker 1: begging letters, and she won't give him what she is
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  Speaker 1: saving for me.' It was a simple and sordid enough
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  Speaker 1: explanation in one sense, and it was one of which
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  Speaker 1: Bettina had known not one parallel, but several. Having married
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  Speaker 1: to ensure himself power over unquestioned resources, the man had
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  Speaker 1: felt himself disgustingly taken in, and avenged himself accordingly. In
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  Speaker 1: him had been born the makings of a domestic tyrant, who,
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  Speaker 1: even had he been favoured by fortune, would have wreaked
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  Speaker 1: his humours upon the defenceless things made his property by
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: ties of blood and marriage— and who, being unfavoured, would
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: do worse. Betty could see what the years had held
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: for Rosie, and how her weakness and timidity had been
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: considered as positive assets. A woman who will cry when
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: she is bullied may be counted upon to submit after
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: she has cried. Rosie had submitted up to a certain point,
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: and then, with the stubbornness of a weak creature, had
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: stood at timid bay for her young. What Betty gathered
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: was that after the long and terrible illness which had
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: followed Uhtred's birth— She had risen from what had been
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: so nearly her deathbed, prostrated in both mind and body.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: Uhtred did not know all that he revealed when he
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: touched upon the time which he said his mother could
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: not quite remember, when she had sat for months staring
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: vacantly out of her window, trying to recall something terrible
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: which had happened, and which she wanted to tell her
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: mother if the day ever came when she could write
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: to her again. She had never remembered clearly the details
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: of the things she had wanted to tell, and Nigel
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: had insisted that her fancy was part of her past delirium.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: He had said that at the beginning of her delirium
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: she had attacked and insulted his mother and himself, but
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: they had excused her because they realised afterwards what the
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: cause of her excitement had been. For a long time
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: she had been too brokenly weak to question or disbelieve,
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: but later she had vaguely known that he had been
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: lying to her, though she could not refute what he said.
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: She recalled in course of time a horrible scene in
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: which all three of them had raved at each other,
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: and she herself had shrieked and laughed and hurled wild
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: words at Nigel, and he had struck her. That she
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: knew and never forgot. She had been ill a year,
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: her hair had fallen out, her skin had faded, and
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: she had begun to feel like a nervous, tired old
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: woman instead of a girl. Girlhood, with all the past,
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: had become unreal and too far away to be more
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: than a dream. Nothing had remained real but Stornham and
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: Nigel and the little hunchback baby. She was glad when
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: the dowager died, and when Nigel spent his time in
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: London or in the Continent and left her with Uhtred.
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: When he said that he must spend her money on
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: the estate, she had acquiesced without comment, because that ensured
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: his going away. She saw that no improvement or repairs
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: were made, but she could do nothing and was too
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: listless to make the attempt. She only wanted to be
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: left alone with Uhtred, and she exhibited willfulness. only in
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: defence of her child, and in her obstinacy with regard
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: to asking money of her father. She thought, somehow, that
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: grandfather and grandmother did not care for her any more,
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: that they had forgotten her and only cared for you,
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: Uhtred explained. She used to talk to me about you,
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: She said you must be so clever and so handsome
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: that no one could remember her. Sometimes she cried and
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: said she didn't want any of you to see her
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: again because she was only a hideous little thin yellow
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: old woman. When I was very little she told me
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: stories about New York and Fifth Avenue. I thought they
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: were not real places. I thought they were places in fairyland.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: Betty patted his shoulder and looked away for a moment
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: when he said this. In her remote and helpless loneliness
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: to Rosie's homesick yearning soul, Noisy, rattling New York, Fifth Avenue,
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: with its traffic and people, its brownstone houses and rickety stages,
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: had seemed like that, so splendid and bright and heart-filling,
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: that she had painted them in colours which could belong
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: only to fairyland. It said so much. The thing she
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: had suspected as she talked to her sister was, before
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: the interview ended, made curiously clear. The first obstacle in
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: her pathway would be the shrinking of a creature who
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: had been so long under dominion that the mere thought
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: of seeing any steps taken towards her rescue filled her
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: with alarm. One might be prepared for her almost praying
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: to be let alone, because she felt that the process
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: of her salvation would bring about such shocks and torments
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: as she could not endure the facing of.' She will
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: have to get used to you,' Uhtred kept saying.' She
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: will have to get used to thinking things.' I will
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: be careful, Bettina answered. She shall not be troubled. I
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: did not come to trouble her. End of chapter 12