Latest / ROAR with Danielle Davies: Women, Culture and Impact / Why Visibility Is Power for Women (with Cheldin Barlatt Rumer)

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Why Visibility Is Power for Women (with Cheldin Barlatt Rumer) · ROAR with Danielle Davies: Women, Culture and Impact

0:04
Hi, I'm Danielle Davies, and you're listening to Roar, a show
0:07
that amplifies the voices of women breaking barriers, leading
0:11
change and making real impact. Keep listening for bold ideas
0:14
and stories that inspire you to find your voice and make some
0:18
noise. Hi everybody, this is Danielle
0:23
Davies, the host of Roar. Today we are closing out Season
0:26
3 with Sheldon Barlett Rumor. Sheldon is the CEO and Executive
0:31
Producer of This Is It Network, a global digital TV network
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committed to amplifying the voices of remarkable women
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through the power of storytelling and community.
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Through her signature Scream Your Dream mission, Sheldon
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empowers women to share their stories with confidence,
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clarity, and unapologetic visibility.
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Her energy is unmatched, her mission unmistakable, and her
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work aligns perfectly with worst commitment to expanding the
0:55
definition of advocacy, showing how women uplift each other
0:59
through creativity, innovation, and everyday impact.
1:02
Sheldon, I am so excited to have you here to closeout Season 3 of
1:05
WAR and thank you. I know you have at least 62
1:08
million other things you could be doing, so I am really
1:12
grateful and I think so will all our listeners be.
1:14
Thanks for being here. Of course, of course I'm
1:17
spoiled. I'm spoiled.
1:18
This is the perfect way to spend my morning SO.
1:20
Thank you. I'm so glad you said so.
1:21
Well, OK, so here's the thing. Yeah, I, I have like a million
1:25
questions obviously, but the first one for anybody who's new
1:28
to you is like, can you explain what is going on?
1:32
What is the This is it network? 100%.
1:36
The only how it was explained to me is she's going to be the next
1:40
Oprah fair and. I'll take it.
1:43
Go and I it's so much and and honestly, like Oprah, there are
1:48
so many elements to what you're doing.
1:51
So can you give us just like a summation of what this is?
1:54
Sure, sure. So this is it.
1:56
Network is a storytelling platform where a digital
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streaming platform, think Netflix, a digital streaming
2:02
platform meets master class, an educational platform where
2:06
celebrities kind of teach you various things, right?
2:08
If those two platforms had a female daughter, that would be
2:12
this is it network, right? So we are celebrating
2:15
educational entertainment in that way.
2:18
And we do that through digital talk shows.
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And I'll share my love of traditional talk shows, Oprah,
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Donahue, Sally, Ricky Montel. If you know, you know, if you're
2:27
from a certain age group, you remember those traditional talk
2:30
shows paired with my love of education.
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I'm an adjunct professor of Temple and Drexel University.
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So the the combination of entertainment and education
2:40
paired with online and offline events is really the heartbeat
2:43
of this Is it Network. I think that everybody should
2:45
learn and laugh at the same time.
2:47
And Sheldon, how long have you? Because there's some really big
2:51
things going on with this Is it network?
2:53
Can you tell me about like the inception now a little bit?
2:57
I mean, obviously it's a long. Of course, of course.
3:00
So in in essence, this all started with a real PR marketing
3:05
and event firm. So I come from that space.
3:07
I come from PR marketing, events, social media, graphic
3:09
design, web design. I had an agency that is now the
3:13
production company for this is it Network IG Creative.
3:16
So IG Creative really helped small business owners in finding
3:20
their voice through digital means.
3:22
So creating their website, hosting their event, putting
3:25
them on Fox good day here in the local Philadelphia area, getting
3:29
them on the on the Today show. But what I really figured out if
3:33
you can feel it through the energy on the screen, if you're
3:35
listening, if you're watching. I have a lot of energy and I am
3:39
an extrovert. There is no denying, there is no
3:42
denying it. You can often hear me before you
3:44
see me. That's really how it really
3:46
works. And for a lot of people, even
3:48
though there are small business owners, even though they have a
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dream, even though they have a concept, even though they have a
3:53
business, the way in which they talk about themselves matters
3:57
and they typically whisper about themselves.
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And So what I was really having a hard time with is that you had
4:04
somebody that you were prepping for, again, a media opportunity.
4:07
A cupcake lady, right? A cookie lady woman that had a
4:10
bakery. We worked a lot with small
4:12
business owners and primarily women and we would prep them for
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these opportunities and they could not part their lips to say
4:18
why somebody should buy their cookies.
4:20
They could not find the words as it relates to why they were
4:24
special and not. And I, overly enthusiastic,
4:28
always wanted to be on television.
4:30
You know, Oprah and media and television and talk shows were
4:33
the beacon for me always. I turned the camera on my
4:36
clients in preparation for these media opportunities to just
4:40
practice with them, right? I'm going to get you
4:41
comfortable. And what happened was something
4:45
lit up in me, right? That this is where I'm supposed
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to be. And they dropped their shoulders
4:50
and began to talk to me about grandmother's recipes and why
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the vegan cupcake was so special to them.
4:56
And I realized at that moment that this was it.
4:59
That's all I want to do for the rest of my life.
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All I want to do is help people tell their stories.
5:03
All I want to do is give people space and time and let them feel
5:06
comfortable to find the words. And so we've been producing
5:09
content ever since. I would go to an opening of a
5:11
tin can with a microphone, happy to be able to tell the story of
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an opening. And so I was interviewing people
5:18
before pandemic in Center City Philadelphia, shoulder to
5:21
shoulder. We were interviewing about 5
5:22
women a day and then the world. Day.
5:26
OK Day. Yeah, yeah, Crazy.
5:28
I have an amazing team. We were very aggressive in the
5:31
way in which we were communicating and how we were
5:33
doing it. And then the world, you know,
5:35
shut down as it did, and we were all safe at home.
5:38
And then the world opened up to me because we were working with
5:41
on Zoom. And so then there was no
5:43
geographic limitations to the women that I was talking to and
5:47
women from Scotland and Nigeria and Toronto, in addition to my
5:51
own backyard. And this is it network.
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I wanted it to be bigger. I wanted to be useful, I wanted
5:57
to be a resource. And so I decided that this I was
6:01
going to take a stab at this streaming platform now that
6:04
there's so many more resources and created this is it network.
6:08
So now it's available on iOS and Android and Apple TV and Roku.
6:11
And we have about 26 new shows that will be launching in Q1 and
6:16
the hopes of 48 new shows for the year in 2026.
6:19
So. Yeah.
6:20
How many shows are available on there right now for people?
6:23
There's over 1000 episodes that are available right now of
6:26
previous things we did from pandemic on event coverage,
6:30
partnership content. You can log on and be able to
6:33
dive into our world. We will be sharing all of the
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new hosts as well as all of the new titles and shows.
6:39
It has been a heavy lift in 2025 to get all of these in the can
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as they say, but we will be drizzling them out through a
6:47
full launch in the new year. So super excited.
6:51
And are we allowed to talk about the fact that there's going to
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be an in person like there is actually a hub that's developed?
6:57
And I want to. Say again about the energy, like
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the fact first of all, I generally am somebody who like
7:05
is a pretty pumped up person myself, but what you are
7:08
accomplishing in a day is like out of control, OK?
7:12
So I'm a crazy person. But I love it and there's and I
7:16
first of all, I love the emphasis on obviously who you're
7:20
helping. I love that you're facilitating
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women's growth and education and entertainment and even their own
7:27
shows. I mean, it's all amazing.
7:30
But the fact is that you are in New Jersey.
7:33
I am in New Jersey. We're not that far from each
7:35
other and we're actually creating something that I can't
7:38
wait to visit. You talk a little bit about that
7:40
too. Absolutely, absolutely.
7:42
And so we really, you know, have been gritty in this, the
7:47
evolution of this is it network, right running and gunning.
7:49
And those of you that are in production, you understand it.
7:52
You throw a camera in a bag, you go to an event, you pop up
7:54
everywhere. And that does take a toll on the
7:57
quality of what it is that you produce.
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It takes a toll on, you know, the staff and the crew and, and
8:02
how often you can do it. And we've been looking for
8:04
years. I've been scouring New Jersey
8:07
has a number of different incentives and programs.
8:09
And we have Netflix that's coming in Paramount that's
8:12
coming. A lot of big players are coming
8:13
to the New Jersey to bring their studios.
8:16
And so I really tapped into that.
8:18
A friend of a friend had told me about all the great things that
8:20
the state was doing. I typically I live in South
8:23
Jersey, but I would go over the bridge in order to film before
8:27
pandemic, we filmed again in Center City Philadelphia.
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And so when I heard about that New Jersey was willing,
8:33
interested, encouraging media outlets to be in the state, to
8:37
develop in the state. I have been clawing through to
8:40
be able to ensure that that happens.
8:42
And so I just recently partnered with Gloucester Township, which
8:45
is in Camden County, New Jersey, again, right over the bridge.
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I'm from Philadelphia and we are really working towards creating
8:52
what is the This is It network media and Innovation Center,
8:55
which will be a hub for digital television.
8:58
So all of the traditional talk show formats that I love, was in
9:01
love with as a child will be now in real life, high RL in real
9:06
life, you know, for people to be able to come on down and visit
9:10
us. So we'll be filming the majority
9:12
of our programs in this facility.
9:14
Our aim is to place the facility within downtown Blackwood, which
9:18
again, is in Gloucester Township, Camden County, New
9:21
Jersey. They have an arts district in
9:23
which they're cultivating at the moment.
9:25
We want to be the anchor property within that arts
9:28
district and working with the Township to bring that to light.
9:30
So it will be a studio, audience studio.
9:33
There'll also be classrooms, podcast suites, video studios,
9:37
as well as a bookstore and retail.
9:40
And so we're really looking for it to be not only a national
9:43
headquarters for what we do, but also a community hub to make
9:46
media a destination here in southern New Jersey.
9:49
So we're super excited. Hey everyone, I've got some
9:51
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9:54
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10:18
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10:24
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10:29
So really small goals, obviously.
10:31
Yeah, I I aim low. Obviously.
10:34
And then you can you definitely hit the.
10:36
I am a prisoner of my wants and grossly ambitious and so, you
10:41
know, I'd rather try and aim for the stars and then, you know, go
10:44
from there. Oh, absolutely.
10:45
That's that's that is I believe I'm 100% there with you.
10:49
But Speaking of, you're not just aiming for the stars yourself.
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You have got like online community, which I don't know
10:55
how you're how many hours are in your day, but you're you've
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facilitated this community with this.
11:02
Is it kind of, I'm sorry, the scream, your dream?
11:05
The. The Screamers.
11:07
Yeah, with the screamers, which is like interesting thing.
11:09
So when I developed this is it, when I had that aha moment as
11:13
anti Oprah says that moment where I was like, this is it.
11:16
This is all I want to do for the rest of my life.
11:19
I realized what I was doing. I had to kind of sit with it,
11:22
right? So not only OK, is it
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television? Is it digital?
11:25
Am I interviewing people? You know, as they often say,
11:27
what is your why? Why are you doing?
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This is because the majority of the women that were sitting with
11:33
me, that were my clients lived their life in what I call a
11:36
whisper. They were whispering their
11:38
wishes, right? And what I wanted them to do
11:41
something that I do naturally, I wanted to share my energy so
11:44
they could scream their dream. And so scream your dream became
11:48
my motto for everything one I have no whisper.
11:51
I think it's a medical condition.
11:52
I feel like I can't physically do it right.
11:54
I bend over, but I'm still yelling right?
11:57
Do what I'm saying right. So yeah, I'm like you're making.
12:00
Yeah, you're. Mine, let's go.
12:02
You know, I physically can't do it.
12:03
So I was like, OK, what makes the most sense?
12:06
You know, how can I articulate this?
12:07
How can I teach this? How can I be of service for
12:10
this? And a lot of it was about
12:12
understanding the power of our voices as women, right?
12:15
It's one thing to know who you are.
12:17
It's another thing to share for it.
12:19
It's another thing to me, right? Yes, yes, 100%.
12:23
Yes, I'm a great writer. OK, great.
12:24
Like what good is that going to do unless you can share with
12:28
others that you're a great writer and women are so powerful
12:32
but so humble and I think that they right they associate we've
12:36
done. Such a disservice to ourselves
12:37
by being so humble. You don't hear?
12:40
I mean, I swear, you know, this is totally not in my notes, but
12:44
years and years ago a friend of mine, my husband is handy.
12:47
He's great with like bars, all this stuff.
12:49
And years ago a friend of ours asked, do you know anybody who
12:53
does tree work? Ed?
12:54
Do you know who? I don't know what how she
12:58
phrased it where he misunderstood and he's like
13:00
y'all figure it out and then and she's like, wait, I didn't mean
13:04
for your husband to come to our trees.
13:06
Like. He's like, I can do it, I'll do
13:10
it, I'll do it. And but women were like, well,
13:12
there's a I'm sure you mean somebody else.
13:15
Like I'm sure there's a real expert.
13:17
It couldn't be me. It could be me.
13:19
Let me go get a 17th certificate to learn how to cut down the
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tray and then still audition to cut down the tray.
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Oh, I apologize that I didn't do the audition the way that you
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thought I would do the audition before you told me I didn't do
13:32
the audition the way in which you thought.
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I've been crazy. And so that's just the way we're
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wired for a lot of different reasons, a lot of systematic
13:40
reasons. There's a lot of what different
13:41
scenarios. But when given the opportunity,
13:44
when given a safe space, the world changes, right?
13:48
I call it the ask twice, right, which is a kind of new concept
13:51
that I've come to understand just from doing so.
13:54
Like if you ask a woman, how are you?
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Obviously they're like, oh. My God, I'm fine, I'm fine, blah
13:59
blah. If you ask 2 times and if you
14:02
engage with them, even touch their elbow, I've had women cry
14:06
because the way in which people are just moving so quickly in
14:10
this world, right are not seen and heard.
14:13
Like if you asked twice, if you asked once, they'll be like of
14:16
course I'm fine, everything's fine, whatever you need, I got
14:19
you. If you allow for them to be
14:21
still enough to tell you the answer and you are with your own
14:24
intention ready to hear the answer, they will tell you how
14:27
they really are. And we need more spaces where
14:31
people are welcome to hear how they really are, not just are
14:34
you fine? Here's what I need you to do for
14:36
me. Are you fine?
14:37
How can I help you? How can I serve you?
14:39
Well, and I love this, and it actually brings me to the next
14:42
question too, because, you know, you're talking about these
14:44
screamers and you're talking about your mission.
14:46
Are there kinds of stories or women that you're most drawn to
14:51
elevating? Do you find that, like you
14:54
respond more to people who match your energy?
14:58
Are they, like you said, the ones that whisper that you've
15:00
gotten through? Sometimes people, that is their
15:03
personality. They just can't, you know,
15:05
they're gonna be like my mother would just absolutely never
15:09
under any circumstances be in front of the camera.
15:13
Under no circumstance will not give a speech.
15:15
Does not want anybody looking at her.
15:17
She's already planned her funeral for no one to be there.
15:20
She's not sick. Just want to make sure you know
15:25
I want no one in the room. Yeah, I want no one there, no
15:27
one looking at me, is the way she phrases it.
15:30
So what kind of women in stories are you drawn to?
15:34
I'm drawn to the the Hidden Figures.
15:38
I'm naturally nosy, like, you know, like just very like tell
15:43
me more. I don't know, teach me.
15:46
I'm a forever student, right? And I'm not even and and when I
15:49
say this, people are like, Oh my gosh, don't like downgrade.
15:52
I'm not saying this to disparage myself, but I am just a vessel.
15:57
Like I don't really do anything aside from, and I'm not saying
16:00
this in a negative way, no, aside from being the
16:03
storyteller, being the viaduct between those who need the story
16:07
and those who have a story to tell.
16:09
I have a unique gift in that way to be that way.
16:12
So the majority of people that I work with or who are part of our
16:15
community members within our community are introverted,
16:19
right? They are whispering, but they
16:21
have remortgaged their house for the cupcake business, but they
16:26
can't part their lips to tell anybody about it.
16:28
And that is a dangerous place because we don't give them the
16:32
safe space in order to be able to do so.
16:34
And they deserve that safe space.
16:36
They deserve a place where they can loudly brag about what it is
16:41
that they've done. And when they people talk about
16:44
bragging, it's a very interesting thing because women
16:46
obviously have a negative connotation as it relates to
16:48
bragging. But I always say if it's true,
16:51
it's just sharing. It's true, it's true.
16:55
That's you're right and we need to, we need so much more of
16:58
that. We just need to be kind of like
17:00
retrained. What about like, you know, you,
17:03
you just mentioned here and there's some funny about it.
17:05
I don't really do something like, but, but obviously like,
17:11
so you've got a creative angle. A lot of people help women.
17:13
Maybe there's funders, right? There are people who help in
17:15
different ways and advocate and uplift women in different ways.
17:18
But you, you have a unique blend of entrepreneurship and creative
17:21
storytelling. How do you see creativity
17:24
driving impact for women today? I think it's again, it is that
17:29
the way in which you tell your story matters.
17:32
Where you tell your story matters.
17:34
Telling your story from your own unique voice matters.
17:37
I think today we are inundated with for you pages.
17:40
We are inundated with content coming at us as if we have no
17:44
choice in the matter, right? And one of the things that I
17:47
think is really important is that we begin to feed our feed,
17:51
right? We begin to tell the algorithms
17:53
what we want. We begin to say, I want more
17:55
cooking content, I want more art content.
17:58
I want more music content. I'm not not going to sit here
18:02
and let you feed me. I'm going to feed you.
18:05
I'm going to tell you what hashtags.
18:07
I'm going to follow more people. I'm going to get more involved
18:09
because when this journey began, the advertising really LED us.
18:13
It was like, For more information, log on to
18:15
www.right. It was all of these really
18:17
destination marketing. And I think that that's where we
18:21
need to get back to. I think people are really
18:23
intoxicated by everything that's coming their way.
18:26
And I think women of all in, in so many ways need to take
18:30
ownership of what they consume and allow for them to be
18:34
creative, allow for them to follow creatives, allow for them
18:38
to enjoy what they're witnessing and watching and be able to
18:41
determine what creatives they want to witness and watch.
18:44
And so I think it's a really unique time.
18:47
I don't blame, you know, a lot of people like social media is
18:49
that I think that these are just tools you use and you can either
18:54
use the tool for good or for bad.
18:56
And I suggest you use it for good.
18:58
And we want to suggest on. We want to provide suggestions
19:01
on how to do that. Oh my gosh, Sheldon, you're very
19:04
good. This is very exciting.
19:05
And you know, I also talked to, you know, initially and we've
19:09
talked about this offline initially.
19:11
Well, I don't know if we said this exact part, but initially I
19:14
was, I have run for office before.
19:17
Obviously a big form of advocacy for women is in the political
19:21
sphere. And it's it is currently, yes,
19:25
you know, people say all the time, but it is like negative
19:28
space right at the moment. It is, it is crazy town.
19:32
So, you know, sometimes people maybe say, OK, put your energy
19:35
here. We have to we have to save the
19:37
world. And we do we do.
19:38
I'm not disputing that. And there are other issues, but
19:42
advocacy isn't 1 size fits all right.
19:44
And that's my firm belief that you can be saving the world
19:48
through your art and you can be saving the world through
19:50
literally just trying to be a joyful person.
19:54
Visibility as a form of advocacy, especially in terms of
20:00
how toxic it is. Now, some people, I think, are a
20:03
little bit even more afraid to be visible than they were.
20:07
Like, like right now, my mother would especially be mortified.
20:11
You know, Right, right. It's a It's a pretty scary time
20:14
to put. Yourself out there, it is scary.
20:16
It is scary and I think that. I think that there needs to be a
20:19
sense of ownership in where it is that you are and who it is
20:23
that you are. I think that when when you're
20:25
comfortable in that space, which I am and what you are, I think
20:29
it does make it easier. I think that being again of
20:32
service is really important. I believe that it's a quote from
20:37
American president. It was Michael J Fox's character
20:40
said in the absence of water in the desert, people drink sand in
20:46
the apps, right? So if there is no alternative,
20:48
if the only people that are yelling are negative, I cannot
20:52
blame those who consume negativity.
20:55
If the only people who have something to say are people who
20:59
are divisive, I cannot blame them for getting on the board of
21:03
divisiveness. But what we want to do,
21:05
especially at this is at network, is to be that water.
21:08
We want to be quench your thirst and when we do, when we are
21:12
present, when we are available, when we are there, people always
21:15
choose good. But when good hides, when good
21:19
surrenders, then they're the alternative for those who aren't
21:22
leaders who aren't for who aren't, you know, willing to
21:25
advocate in the most outrageous ways.
21:28
And I'm an outrageous advocate. They get lost, right?
21:33
They they go, you know, the majority of general public is,
21:36
wants to be LED. And if there is, if the only
21:40
leader that's showing up is divisive, they are more apt to
21:44
be in fact divisive. If an alternative exists, then
21:48
we have a better chance of sharing joy.
21:50
Joy is light, right? Joy is like, I love you love I
21:54
bleed, you bleed, don't you see right.
21:57
And if that's all it took, we wouldn't be in any of these
21:59
issues. Like if that's all it took was
22:01
to be like, duh, like we should all be equal.
22:05
We wouldn't be in these issues. But you know what happened
22:08
happens is that hate recruits. Hate has a campaign and a slogan
22:13
and a brand standards guide, right?
22:16
Love has an assumption. And so love needs to catch up.
22:20
Love needs to be as consistent and we need to recruit and love
22:23
and we need to share educational entertainment.
22:25
And that's that's what I'm doing.
22:26
I love that you said this. I have to also.
22:29
I'm going to link back up anybody who's listening and you,
22:33
I have a friend, the novelist Catherine Center.
22:36
She's in out of Texas. She's she's huge and she's
22:39
amazing. And her thing is reading for
22:43
Joy. Well, it was reading for Joy.
22:44
She's kind of she's like, I feel like I've had that motto for a
22:46
while now. But one of the things she said
22:48
to us last season was if the only stories we're telling are
22:55
horror stories, scary stories, then that's all we've got.
22:58
That's our, that's the reflection of humanity.
23:02
And that that's, you know, I love a good scary story.
23:06
I love, you know, things like this.
23:08
I'm not I'm, you know, every so often a true crime podcast.
23:12
I love Mr. Ball, but you can't live on that.
23:16
You can't sustain. You have to.
23:18
There has to be the alternative. There has to be the alternative
23:21
and the alternative needs to be committed to it in the same way
23:25
that the scariness is committed to it.
23:27
And it because that's how it works.
23:29
That's that's and, and to what you said before was just so
23:33
important is that it's in various ways.
23:35
It lives on picket lines, it lives in boardrooms, it lives on
23:40
art and walls. It lives through storytelling
23:43
and poetry. It lives through staying at your
23:46
full time job and advocating within your cubicle.
23:48
It lives within all of these different scenarios.
23:51
And what often happens, even on the side of good is we begin to
23:55
measure good. We begin to fight infight about
23:59
how good you are versus how good I am and how good good this
24:02
needs to be when the again, hatred is a collective hatred
24:07
works as a team hatred recruits recruits regardless of whether
24:11
or not they are aligned. And so I want us to be able to
24:15
make sure that those that want to share goodness and those that
24:17
want to share stories are aligned as well.
24:21
I got hatred works as a team. OK, I'm going to be circling
24:24
back to that. I mean, when to pull out quotes.
24:26
But you know, you've been doing this a long time and you're
24:29
obviously really good at it. And you, you draw these stories
24:32
out of women and it's very inspiring and impressive.
24:36
But so it's also, I mean, while you're not necessarily, you
24:39
weren't a sociology major, right?
24:41
No, you're not necessarily like a psychologist, an armchair
24:44
psychologist, a sociologist. But you, you've seen how women
24:49
have told stories and you've seen that.
24:51
Do you have any theories, ideas? What do you think is keeping so
24:55
many of us quiet or hesitant to be seen?
24:56
But also, in the years you've been doing this, have you?
25:00
What's the biggest shift you've seen and how we tell our
25:03
stories? Yeah, 1 the reason why we don't
25:06
is because we do we're too busy doing women, they're too busy
25:11
doing to tell their story. I mean, think about it from
25:15
marketers role will relate to this those in advertising and
25:18
marketing. You know, you, you're, you sell
25:22
marketing, you give marketing services, but market yourself
25:25
not right. Like, it's very much a
25:27
situation, right? The majority of people, right,
25:31
like the majority of bakers don't even want to sell their
25:33
cookies. They just want to make them.
25:35
Right. Right.
25:36
They don't even want, they would love to just bake cookies all
25:40
day long. Where this is it Network comes
25:42
in as we come in and we sell your cookies.
25:44
We help you sell your cookies. We help more people know about
25:46
you today than yesterday. That's what's necessary and the
25:50
reason why it's not that women are short on stories.
25:52
We are short on where our stories can live, right?
25:56
And so years ago, a gentleman, as they do, came up to me and
26:00
was like, I heard what you're doing, like, what are you like?
26:03
So what are your thoughts? It was kind of like at this, he
26:05
didn't talk like that, but in my head he did, you know, So and
26:08
then, you know, it came up to me with like a warm Chardonnay, you
26:11
know what I mean? In a networking event, it was
26:13
like, you know, trying to get at me to like.
26:15
Warm Chardonnay you. Know what I mean?
26:20
So what do you got going on? Like fill me in, right?
26:22
And, and without hesitation, I said we're, we're creating
26:27
history. And because history is made by
26:30
those who tell the story. And if you do not tell the
26:33
story, you are left out of history, period.
26:35
Hard stop. When my daughter, 20 years from
26:39
now, 30 years from now, young girls, people in general will
26:42
look back and be like those women in 2025 kicked ass because
26:47
it will be documentation that we kicked ass.
26:50
It won't be waiting for permission or pitching our
26:52
stories or hoping somebody pays attention to us.
26:55
It will be. It will be evident.
26:57
There will be evidence of our excellence.
26:59
It would have. It would have.
27:00
We'll live. And that alone, right?
27:02
That alone is why I do what I do.
27:05
Quick pause to invite you into the ROAR community.
27:08
War is all about amplifying women's voices, and you can be
27:11
part of it. I share the messy, unfiltered
27:13
behind the scenes stuff in my emails, things you won't hear
27:16
anywhere else. Sign up at Listen to roar.com
27:20
and get in on the real talk and a.
27:23
If this episode hit home, don't keep it to yourself.
27:25
Share it. Drop a comment or pass it to
27:28
that one friend who needs to hear it.
27:30
Every share helps bring more women's stories into the
27:32
spotlight. All right, let's get back to the
27:34
episode. Sheldon, who is the Sheldon for?
27:37
You like you. No, I'm serious.
27:40
Have you. I mean, obviously you're an
27:41
extrovert. Obviously you're.
27:42
Yeah. Well, you know what you're
27:43
doing. You know what you're talking
27:44
about. But you've got a lot of faith
27:46
and belief and in what you're doing, and first of all, that
27:50
just needs to rub off on everyone.
27:52
But like, what was your mother like?
27:55
Like what? Don't.
27:56
You get this. Let me and I tell this story
27:59
quite often, which is which is so my mom in my house.
28:03
So I'm W African. So I was born in Freetown,
28:05
Sierra Leone. I'm W African.
28:07
I'm an immigrant, I'm all the things and I come from this
28:09
amazing W African large, gigantic, crazy, admittedly
28:14
family and we're just and they're completely academic like
28:17
everybody is attorneys and doctorates and and just amazing
28:20
and my mother in our home to this day.
28:23
I'm blessed. She's 80 by both of my parents
28:25
are 80 and in their home you will find and this has been
28:28
since I was small. And are they here also in New
28:30
Jersey now They're. Here in New Jersey, New.
28:32
Jersey, right? That's New Jersey.
28:33
OK. Think of a piece of work like if
28:34
you ever come to any of our conferences, my, my mother will
28:37
be checking you in at the front, the front, and you better have
28:40
your identification and you better be sure you want to take
28:43
it and the whole thing. She's wild, but she's lovely.
28:45
She was she's a retired elementary school principal, my
28:48
father at Stockton University, retired chemistry professor from
28:53
Stockton University in South Jersey.
28:55
But all I'm one of four shocker. I'm a middle child.
28:58
Of course I am. And so every my my older sister
29:02
has her doctorate. My younger sister has her
29:04
doctorate. My younger brother graduated
29:05
from Cornell Law. I come from excellence, right?
29:10
And, and it was very evident at a very young age that you show
29:14
up early, you leave late, that you over deliver always that
29:18
that's just the way I was the athlete.
29:20
I played Division One field hockey for LaSalle University.
29:23
I've always been again, an extrovert and wanting to
29:26
entertain and the family member that gives the speeches like I'm
29:29
the one right in my house, right in my home.
29:33
There were always quotes everywhere, little quotes just
29:36
everywhere. You'd open a drawer, there'd be
29:38
a quote. You'd wake up in the morning on
29:40
the mirror, there'd be a quote behind the door.
29:42
To this day, behind the door, every bathroom door, there's a
29:44
series of different quotes. And I remember coming home from
29:48
college as an ungrateful young person.
29:50
And I was just like, you do, right?
29:52
Like you do. And I went to brush my teeth and
29:54
there was some poignant quote right in my face.
29:58
And I was like, and my mom was like, good morning, you know
30:00
what I mean? And I'm like, probably hungover,
30:03
ungrateful. Like I see the quote, I can't
30:06
see my teeth. I'm like, mom, what is the deal?
30:11
I mean, and it was decades at that point that I had just seen
30:13
this. Like, you know, it was over 10
30:15
years that I had seen these. There's quotes everywhere.
30:17
And she looked at me very swiftly and said, sometimes you
30:22
will not have the words. My job is to ensure that words
30:26
inspire you. That was it.
30:29
And I was like, I'm sorry. So if you follow us on this is
30:33
it network on every 10th post is a quote.
30:35
Like we live by quotes and motivation.
30:37
And because we won't always have the words, you won't always have
30:41
the words. I am.
30:43
And I've been accused of being, you know, amongst the toxic
30:46
positivity people that are always positive all the time.
30:49
And I say I'm not positive all the time.
30:51
And that's why I'm positive all the time.
30:53
I need it. I need it.
30:56
Got it. Utilize it, right?
30:58
I utilize it. And so my mother has always been
31:00
that. She's always been the one that
31:02
says if I have it, you have it. If I don't have it, we don't
31:06
have it. But if I have it, you have it.
31:08
So it's very much been. And that's what I do to my
31:11
children and my children's friends.
31:12
And I'm I'm the one that much as my life is crazy, I'm driving
31:15
them around and taking them to football games and having
31:17
sleepovers and doing all the things.
31:19
Because if I have it, you have it.
31:21
And I know that a lot of people aren't built that way and that
31:23
is OK, but because I'm built that way and that's what I'm
31:26
meant to do. So I.
31:28
But because you are, you're able to kind of give this of yourself
31:32
to so many women. I mean, it's a lot of women.
31:36
And I'm just out of curiosity, are do you notice in the scream
31:40
your dream? Yeah, because because you meet,
31:42
it's not just like you're not just you actually meet up.
31:45
And these women have a Wednesday scream their dream.
31:47
Yeah, every Wednesday, 12:00 PM Eastern.
31:50
Yeah, OK, so every Wednesday, women come on, they get to talk
31:53
about what they're doing if they want to, right?
31:55
It's like, yeah, OK. Because I I, I, I have an
31:58
obligation every Wednesday. So I haven't been able to go but
32:01
I. It's OK.
32:02
No, I want you, but I also want you so I can explain it, you
32:05
know? Yeah, this is what it is.
32:07
It's a. Wonderful thing, because
32:08
ambitious women rarely celebrate their ambition, right?
32:12
They rarely celebrate their ambition and they rarely ask for
32:15
help, right? It's just a nature of who it is
32:17
that we are. And so I will typically it's an
32:20
hour long. It's only an hour long.
32:22
We begin, we end. I give a little State of the
32:24
Union, a little inspiration, personal brand lesson to kind of
32:28
kick us off. What's going on with the
32:30
network, what upcoming events are going on, what they should
32:32
be, where they should be, all of those things.
32:34
What are we up to? What are we promoting?
32:35
That kind of thing. And then the remainder of that
32:38
hour is you either bring an ask or a scream to the meeting.
32:42
So you either bring an ask or a scream.
32:45
So anybody can lift up their icon.
32:47
We do it via Zoom and you can lift up your icon and you can
32:49
say, you know, hey, I'm, I need an IP attorney.
32:53
Hey, what is SEO? Hey, I need, as an ask, I'm at
32:58
498 followers on Instagram. I need two more people to like
33:02
my page. Can anybody like my page?
33:05
And it gets you over that edge, right?
33:07
And so it's really about getting comfortable weekly and asking
33:11
for what it is that you need. And then the scream, the scream
33:15
can be a celebration of anything.
33:16
It could be if you have young children that you potty trained
33:20
your son and that deserves to be celebrated.
33:22
It could be you finally sent out your first e-mail blast and that
33:25
deserves to be celebrated. You launched your book, you're
33:28
throwing an event. It just gives you a space to be
33:31
able to ask for help or celebrate what you have done.
33:34
And also, and you can hear and people are connecting.
33:38
There's so many different partnerships that have started,
33:40
relationships that have grown. Yeah, relationships that have
33:44
grown, podcasts that are shared because it's not an it's an
33:48
inclusive group, not an exclusive group.
33:51
So you don't have to say, Oh my gosh, if I'm part of this is the
33:55
screamer dream community, I can't be part of part of
33:57
anything. I'm addicted to women's groups.
33:59
I'm part of NABO and like, all of these different.
34:03
Hey, mom. I mean, every name, every
34:05
women's group, they get my money 1999 at a time, every month,
34:09
right? And so, but it's the collective
34:12
that is our power. It's all of these women's groups
34:15
together that is our power. We actually have an upcoming
34:17
campaign to support that. But yeah, so it's it's really,
34:21
it's really about being honest. I don't know what I'm doing.
34:25
Do the women like and you were saying, you know, do they start
34:29
to then I'm just picturing someone of the Shire people that
34:33
you started off with. Like I, I keep thinking about
34:35
like the Baker who's like not able to say and, and maybe then
34:38
like I can picture this person possibly getting up, like, you
34:42
know, the nerve and group to say, I haven't asked, but the,
34:46
the scream would be a little harder, right?
34:49
Like the scream to be like, I did this awesome thing.
34:52
And I, and, and I just want to tell you so people, I always
34:57
used to say when I was a teacher, like this was a really
34:59
big mistake on my part because I, I wanted to be an actress
35:02
when I grew up and I was like, and I want people to clap for
35:05
me. Yeah, this was.
35:06
A bad choice? No, I wanted applause.
35:09
Yeah. Oh, it was.
35:13
But I don't think I mean simplistically you're like, I
35:15
want people to clap, but also you want people to feel
35:18
something. People slaps because they feel
35:20
something. And now?
35:22
100% it was 6th grade it was feeling anything there nothing's
35:25
changed though there was a lack of feeling entirely except Get
35:29
Me Out of here from all parts. I I that's not my skill set.
35:33
They did it. 6th grade isn't my skill set.
35:35
But like, but I'm saying like these women, are they starting
35:38
to kind of almost. And I don't yeah.
35:40
I don't mean they're like Sheldon acolytes although.
35:43
No. No.
35:44
But do they start to then yeah, alter and start to do it for
35:49
each other, Like are you? Oh my gosh, 100%.
35:52
I have had people who have met at our so we do this.
35:54
This is it Network Live Women's Conference.
35:57
Next year will be our fifth year doing it.
35:58
And we've had people who met sitting at a table, who now work
36:04
together and are partners in a business.
36:06
We have people who met and then are now on each other's
36:09
podcasts, have written their forewords for each other's
36:11
books. Like this is the movement and
36:14
content is the tool for it, right?
36:16
We meet online and offline. We have national events in which
36:19
we attend. We have small boutique events in
36:21
which we serve our community in a way that is so useful and
36:27
authentic because ultimately we all deserve to be seen and
36:32
heard. And but we speak as
36:33
entrepreneurs, leaders, executives, as ambitious women.
36:36
And that means whether or not you're in the boardroom or
36:38
whether or not you're in your kitchen, right?
36:41
Whether or not you're running your household like a Fortune
36:43
500 company or whether or not you're on your third bakery, you
36:47
deserve to be amongst people who hear and see you.
36:50
And we just want to provide that time and space and so and to
36:53
give you that time and space. So they have just been absolute
36:57
and they bring things to the table for us.
36:58
Hey, you should be, we should be part of this particular event or
37:02
child. And I, you know, I need a
37:03
keynote speaker for this or, you know, the bakery folks, it's
37:07
like, oh, you know, so and so needs more cupcakes for her
37:09
event or for her children's part.
37:11
And so it becomes this organic where again, the example that
37:15
you gave of your husband when it was like figuring it out.
37:17
Men are also equally, I got a guy, right?
37:20
They got a guy for everything. My husband has a guy for
37:22
everything. Right, right.
37:25
And us, we're like, oh, well, you know, I don't know.
37:27
Well, let me see. Right.
37:29
Like let our be, let us be our own ecosystem where we've got a
37:33
gal for everything. Yeah.
37:35
Oh, like like that. And you know, you, you did say
37:39
I'm on. I'm not going to keep you much
37:40
longer. I've got 2 questions.
37:41
I'm obsessed, OK. I love it.
37:44
You mentioned even like, you know, that future generations,
37:48
your daughter or my daughter, they're going to look and be
37:50
like those girls in 2025, like we had it together.
37:53
What? What are you hoping they get out
37:56
of it the next generation? Like what do you hope it models
37:59
for them in terms of not just, you know, looking back and be
38:03
like they did it? What specifically are there
38:06
specifics you're hoping they take out of it?
38:08
You know, and you and I talked offline about something about,
38:11
you know, our strong daughters recently and what they're
38:14
willing to accept versus what we were willing to accept growing
38:17
up in a different time period. What are you hoping like that
38:21
next generation then pulls from this and extracts and and
38:25
actually right right now this is the thing that's building.
38:27
But in the future, hopefully this is they're evolving from
38:30
this. Yes, for me, it's all of the
38:34
volumes of a woman, which is something that I've been kind of
38:37
needling on, right. And as we're talking about,
38:40
there's a lot of, and what I've been thinking about specifically
38:44
is that there's a lot of moving parts that are kind of creating
38:46
this traditional trad wives versus girl bosses versus really
38:52
segmenting women and doing so really intentionally against
38:56
each other. Where I would love for our
38:59
women, young women and women generations to come to know that
39:03
there are different volumes of women.
39:05
Kind of like if you're old enough to understand what an
39:07
encyclopedia is, right? There was different volumes of
39:11
encyclopedias and you can pull off the shelf the volume that is
39:14
Sheldon and it is Mom and it is daughter and it is entrepreneur
39:17
and it is former athlete. It's all these things.
39:19
But you could also pull down a book that is Emily and she was a
39:23
stay at home wife and mother and loved it.
39:27
And it was baking cookies and making, you know, costumes from
39:31
scratch for Halloween. And they are best friends and
39:36
the. There's value.
39:37
There's value to it and the sourdough bread that Emily
39:40
makes. Sheldon comes over and eats
39:42
heartily, and Emily is the first person in line for her grand
39:45
opening. That is what I want, and I don't
39:48
want it to be a situation where women are fighting for the
39:51
limited space that we have amongst each other.
39:53
That we allow each other to be what they want to be.
39:57
To give them choices to applaud even when they disagree, or to
40:02
choose to do with themselves what they wish and not condemn
40:05
others for the choices in which they make if there's no harm
40:07
caused. That we can live amongst each
40:10
other as a unit because again, hate works as a team and if we
40:14
can begin to work as a team, I cannot imagine what this world
40:18
will look like. So.
40:19
Sheldon, you and I realized you said you were born in in Africa,
40:24
but you came to. New Jersey, Very young.
40:26
Very young, yeah. Literally New Jersey is where
40:29
you came and so as somebody from South Jersey, so we grew up,
40:34
FYI, be listening. We, we found out something I
40:37
found out we grew up really very close to each other.
40:40
And so I, I, I'm, we're both very familiar with our local
40:45
community. And so, and there's wonderful
40:48
people here. We live wonderful community and
40:50
I love it. But I don't know.
40:52
And honestly, I've lived a lot of places and even that I don't
40:56
know a lot of people that have goals this big that are willing
41:02
to share them because a lot of times people take big, bold,
41:06
audacious goals and they keep quiet because not just the, not
41:11
even loud, yeah, we'll keep it. Like, it's so audacious.
41:17
It's so outrageous that I'm not even gonna say it.
41:22
It's like. Again, it's.
41:23
Preposterous, right? But it's like if I were like,
41:27
well, actually I've built a space shuttle in my backyard
41:30
like it's and you'd be like, what?
41:32
And I'm like, cuz I'm going, I'm going to space and I just it's
41:35
terrifying to think what people, but you are like, you are doing
41:39
it. You are, you are doing it and
41:41
it's and you're such an inspiration and such a great way
41:44
to kick off or to to end this season on a high note.
41:48
But what advice would you give to a woman listening who has a
41:52
dream just to seed and doesn't even know where to start?
41:56
Yeah, it is the company you keep, my darlings.
41:59
It is the company you keep. There is danger in, in, in, in
42:04
constantly battling with people around you.
42:08
I think that there is a danger in sharing your ambition with
42:12
people who are not worthy of it. There is a danger in it, right?
42:16
There's a danger in constantly. I got an idea and taking it to
42:20
people who do not see you and do not hear you.
42:22
My mom again, a wise, wise woman with the quotes all over.
42:26
One of the things she always used to tell me is stop going to
42:30
the same well, looking for different water.
42:33
Stop going to the same person over and over again looking for
42:36
the reaction to be different. Stop trying to convince and try
42:40
to find people you are amongst like stop like they're.
42:43
We all have our own communities. You and I are kindred spirits,
42:46
right? We knew it from the moment in
42:48
which we connected. And there might be a room where
42:51
people are not in favor of my loudness and my lashes and my
42:54
lips and my weave and the whole thing like I might be a lot.
42:56
That's not my room. And if I keep and, and I can
43:00
convince people to come over to my room and I can softly
43:02
convince them, but I can't hold my integrity and who it is that
43:06
I am and people who do not see me.
43:08
And So what I want women to do is find rooms that see them.
43:12
And there are rooms that see them if you are on the social
43:15
media platforms, if you're on TikTok, if you're there is
43:18
crochet talk that is different than knit knitting talk that is
43:21
different than puzzle talk that is different than Harry Potter
43:24
talk. There is a community within
43:25
communities for all of us. And so often we spend so much
43:29
time auditioning for people who do not have a part for us that
43:32
we lose who we are. And so I encourage people to
43:35
find their people. And they may not be the people
43:38
that live with them or the people they grew up with.
43:40
And that doesn't mean disregard them.
43:42
That just means departmentalize them and go find the people that
43:45
you can share your ambition with.
43:47
That's what I. Think Sheldon, this has been a
43:50
great conversation. I am so grateful for your time.
43:53
Everybody, everything is going to be in the show notes.
43:55
I'll show everything and everywhere and I'm very excited.
43:58
I feel like this is this episode is literally coming out on
44:02
December 23rd. So even though it's really close
44:05
to the holidays, I feel like it's something that people can
44:07
with over the holidays and like, kick off their new year with
44:11
some really big dreams. And thank you so much for your
44:15
time. Oh my gosh, I'm obsessed with
44:17
you. Thank you so much for allowing
44:19
me to share space and time with you.
44:20
I look forward to working with you more in the future.
44:23
Likewise. OK, have a great day everybody.
44:25
Thanks. And that's a wrap on today's
44:28
conversation and on Season 3 of Roar.
44:32
A huge thank you to Sheldon for bringing her fire, her honesty,
44:35
and her unstoppable energy. And an even bigger thank you to
44:39
you. You.
44:39
Every single one of you who listened, shared episodes, sent
44:43
messages, and helped make this such a meaningful and powerful
44:46
season. This show exists because of you,
44:48
and I'm endlessly grateful for the community we're building
44:51
together. I also want to thank all the
44:53
incredible guests who've joined me this season.
44:55
Your stories, your courage, and your generosity help shape every
44:58
episode. And to our brilliant editor, you
45:01
know who you are. Thank you for making every
45:03
conversation sound its best. I really don't think I could do
45:06
this without you. We'll be taking a short break,
45:09
but Roar will be back with Season 4 in April 2026.
45:13
To stay in the loop on announcements, guest reveals,
45:15
and a few special things I'm working on during the hiatus,
45:18
head to listen to roar.com. That's LISTENTOROA, r.com, and
45:27
sign up for the mailing list. It's the best way to stay
45:29
connected until we're back on air.
45:31
Until then, keep using your voice, keep telling your
45:34
stories, and keep roaring. I'll see you in April.