Latest / Motivation Mindset Podcast / Just Let It Go & Move On – Goggins’ Guide to Letting Go.

Transcript

Just Let It Go & Move On – Goggins’ Guide to Letting Go. · Motivation Mindset Podcast

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: You can't speak about the way I do unless you
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: process it.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: You go back a million times, you battle it, you
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: overcome it. Even though it's gone. You got to go
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: back in your mind and face it and overcome it.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: With my father when I.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: Was twenty two, I believe I was twenty two twenty three,
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: I had to go back and face him, actually facing
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: one on one, and.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: That's really when I realized I.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Had to go back to the You know, like, if
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: your knee hurts, a lot of people focus on your knee.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: It may be your if it's your left knee, it
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: might be your right hip. We were never focused on
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: the hip force on the knee. So for me, I
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: was focus on all this surface.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: So when I went to the Air Force, I quit
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: in training because I learned how to.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: Read, I learned how to write, I learned how to swim.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: But a second something hard came up. I went right
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: back to where always going. I'm like, God, man, I thought,
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: I fixed all this.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: Know. My left knee was hurting, and I worked on
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: my left knee. It stopped hurting, But my right hip
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: was the problem. So my right hip was my dad
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: and the crux of my problems.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: Wasn't anything to do with everything in life. It was
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: due with my father, because that's where it started. It
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: started there, the original story, it started there.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: So I went back to the start point and had
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: a face where all this happened, where the mindset started,
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: the mindset of you know, all this being beat for
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: no reason and feeling like you're nothing, and feeling like
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: you got a lie.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: To gain friends.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: And you know, my mind was developed, but it wasn't
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: developing properly in that hell.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: You can't develop a mind in the hell I lived in.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: So what happened was people blame me back in the day.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: My god, you lied about this and you did that.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: Let me put your fucking ass in that shi, go
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: go be born in that man. Let me see how
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: you come out.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: Let me see how secured in your foundation you are
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: when you get beat.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: For this fking doing nothing because he's drunk and he's
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: mad at you.
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: So you learn to survive. But surviving doesn't make you win.
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: Surviving makes you a fucking cockroach. It makes you just
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: do that. Survive it makes you lie. How can I
• 2:27
  Speaker 3: get through this? How can I get around this?
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: Versus?
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: Being a man is standing up for what you believe
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: in your coward, so you lie and you manipulate.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: But that's what those foundations.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: A lot of people are beaten mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally,
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: so it makes you a coward. But then people blame
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: you for how you act when you're thirty years old.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: They don't know where you come from, they don't know
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: the hell you had to endure while your mind.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: Is the way it is now, so you have to
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: go back and fix that shit.
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: You gotta go back to where this came from.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: Not gonna fix it now, you'll go back and fix it.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: So I went back there, I realized this sacking God.
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: I had to look at my dad and forgive him
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: without saying sorry.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: No one said sorry. I had to go back and
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: say why were you so fucking nuts?
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: And realized, oh, you never went back, right, you never
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: went back, and whatever you up while you beat the
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: shit out of my mom, me and my brother, you
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: never went back. So you took all that shit out
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: on us, and therefore that's how the generational shit goes on.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: My dad was an alcoholic. My dad was a druggie.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: I'm a druggie. That's how that she goes on. No
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: one stops it. I stopped it. So that's what that
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: caused me to.
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: Do, and you forgave him in your own mind.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: In my own mind. He died a few years back.
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: I didn't go to the funeral, but I don't hate him.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: I had to let it go. It was over.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: That part of my life is over. I don't hate you.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: You're my father. I respect you for that, but I
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: also know why you were the way you work. You
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: have to understand the demon before you can fix it.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: Man.
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: Of all the things mister Chuf taught me, the biggest
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: challenge for me was personal development. It was hard to
• 4:22
  Speaker 4: give up my old blame list. I was so comfortable
• 4:25
  Speaker 4: blaming my shortcomings on the government, my negative relatives, the
• 4:29
  Speaker 4: company unions, the economy, interest rates, prices, and every other
• 4:32
  Speaker 4: imaginable circumstance. It was quite a transition for me to
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: change from blaming everyone and everything else to taking responsibility
• 4:40
  Speaker 4: for my life. But mister Chauff made me realize the
• 4:44
  Speaker 4: importance of making that transition with a simple statement. He said,
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: it's not what happens in the world that determines the
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: major part of your future. What happens happens to us
• 4:56
  Speaker 4: all the key is what you do about it. He
• 5:00
  Speaker 4: encouraged me to start the process of change, to do
• 5:03
  Speaker 4: something different in the following ninety days than I had
• 5:05
  Speaker 4: done in the previous ninety days.
• 5:08
  Speaker 5: And I'm asking you to do the same.
• 5:10
  Speaker 4: Whether it's picking up a book, starting a new health discipline,
• 5:14
  Speaker 4: improving your relationship with your family. Whatever it is, however small,
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: the action you need to start the process. Mister Chauff
• 5:23
  Speaker 4: then gave me another secret to success when he said,
• 5:26
  Speaker 4: all that you have at the moment, mister Roane, you've
• 5:28
  Speaker 4: attracted by the person you are. Once I began to
• 5:32
  Speaker 4: understand this principle, it explained so much. Mister Schoff continued,
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: mister Roan, you've only got pennies in your pocket. You've
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: got nothing in the bank, The creditors are calling, and
• 5:43
  Speaker 4: you're behind on your promises. Here's how that occurred. Misfortune
• 5:47
  Speaker 4: has taken place because of the kind of person you are.
• 5:50
  Speaker 4: I said, well, how can I change all that? He answered,
• 5:55
  Speaker 4: If you will change yourself, everything else will change for you.
• 5:58
  Speaker 4: You don't have to change what's outside. All you've got
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: to change is what's inside. To have more, you simply
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: have to become more and then he said, don't wish
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: it were easier, wish that you were better, don't wish
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: for fewer problems, wish for more skills. Start making these
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: personal changes and it will all change for you.
• 6:20
  Speaker 5: He was absolutely right.
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: Picture for a moment, a little wildebeast in Africa. Do
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: you know how much time it has after birth to
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: learn how to run with the pack so it's not
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: eaten by the lions? A few minutes. As soon as
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: the little wildebeast is born, it tries to stand up.
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: When it falls down, its mother nudges it and gets
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: it to stand back up. Then it falls back down finally,
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: on little shaky legs, it tries to nurse. The mother
• 6:47
  Speaker 4: pushes it away. She moves so it can't nurse. Why
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: she's sending a message, you can't nurse.
• 6:54
  Speaker 5: Now.
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: You've got to develop some strength or the lions will
• 6:57
  Speaker 4: get you. You've got to get these legs strong. We
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: don't have much time. How long does this process take
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: for a human baby. As a parent of grown children,
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: I'm still not sure. It's unbelievable the amount of time
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: it takes for personal development, for spiritual development, for physical development.
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: But there's something else that takes time, and that's your
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: mental development, feeding the mind. Some people read so infrequently
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: that they've got rickets of the mind. They couldn't give
• 7:29
  Speaker 4: you a good, strong argument as to their own personal beliefs.
• 7:34
  Speaker 4: Here's one of the challenges we have to face as parents,
• 7:37
  Speaker 4: getting our kids ready to debate today's major life issues.
• 7:41
  Speaker 4: They've got to develop their own well informed opinions. You
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: can help them do just that, but only if you
• 7:46
  Speaker 4: first commit to doing it yourself. And here's the next challenge.
• 7:50
  Speaker 4: You've got to be able to defend your opinions. If
• 7:53
  Speaker 4: you can't defend your virtues, and if you can't defend
• 7:55
  Speaker 4: your values, you'll fall prey to philosophies that are not
• 7:57
  Speaker 4: in your best interest.
• 7:59
  Speaker 5: We've got to help our kids.
• 8:01
  Speaker 4: They need to be well informed about the major life issues,
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  Speaker 4: the political issues, the social issues, the religious issues, the
• 8:08
  Speaker 4: spiritual issues, and the economic issues. You've got to get
• 8:12
  Speaker 4: yourself and your kids ready for the great challenge of
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: today to develop your philosophy and defend your virtues and
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: your values. When most people think of Ben Franklin, they
• 8:21
  Speaker 4: remember the kite and the lightning bolt and the discovery
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: of electricity. What a lot of people may not know
• 8:28
  Speaker 4: is that Ben Franklin was one of the first writers
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: to address self making. When Franklin started Poor Richard Zalmanac
• 8:35
  Speaker 4: in seventeen thirty two, he used the blank spaces between
• 8:39
  Speaker 4: the crop data and the weather information to insert clever
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: bits of moral and practical advice. I'm sure you've heard
• 8:46
  Speaker 4: the saying fish and companies start to stink in three days.
• 8:49
  Speaker 4: That was one of hundreds of Ben Franklin's comments on life.
• 8:53
  Speaker 5: Another was diligence is the mother of good luck.
• 8:57
  Speaker 4: You know, it's amazing how hard working, intelligent people have
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: all the luck. We sometimes hear of a brand new
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: musical group and overnight success. They must have been in
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: the right place at the right time, knew the right people,
• 9:10
  Speaker 4: had a friend helped them out. But if you've ever
• 9:14
  Speaker 4: watched an interview with some of these folks, you'll probably
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: hear that their overnight success actually took several years.
• 9:22
  Speaker 5: Diligence is the mother of good luck.
• 9:25
  Speaker 4: In addition to those witticisms, Ben Franklin gave us three
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: principles of success that have withstood the test of time.
• 9:32
  Speaker 4: Number One, happiness doesn't come from big pieces of great success,
• 9:36
  Speaker 4: but from small, daily achievements. What mister Franklin is saying
• 9:40
  Speaker 4: is that we must be happy with what we've got
• 9:42
  Speaker 4: when we're in pursuit of what we really want. Too
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: often we say, oh, I'll be happy when I just
• 9:48
  Speaker 4: get that promotion. I'll be happy when I just land
• 9:51
  Speaker 4: that contract. I'll be happy when I just have more money.
• 9:56
  Speaker 4: I'll be happy when I.
• 9:57
  Speaker 5: Just just why.
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: You won't be any happier when you reach your goals
• 10:04
  Speaker 4: than you are right now. It just doesn't work that way.
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: Abraham Lincoln said it best. He said, you'll be as
• 10:12
  Speaker 4: happy as you make up your mind to be, whether
• 10:15
  Speaker 4: you're on your way or you've already gotten there. You'll
• 10:17
  Speaker 4: be as happy as you make up your mind to
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: be right now. Being happy on the way doesn't mean
• 10:23
  Speaker 4: you can't aim for great things. After all, look at
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: everything Franklin accomplished in his lifetime. It means that big
• 10:31
  Speaker 4: achievements come one small step at a time.
• 10:34
  Speaker 5: It means that.
• 10:34
  Speaker 4: You've got to enjoy the journey. It means that you
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: must enjoy and take pride in your little accomplishments. It
• 10:41
  Speaker 4: means celebrating who you are becoming in pursuit of your
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: larger goal and it means doing so every single day.
• 10:47
  Speaker 4: Ben Franklin's second principle was life is not rigid. Within
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: each of us lies the power to mold ourselves and
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: our environment. It is up to each of us to
• 10:57
  Speaker 4: begin this molding process with a final product in mind.
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: And it is within your power to work on your
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: goals regularly. By using your mind and your abilities, you'll
• 11:07
  Speaker 4: soon see how much power you have to achieve your goals.
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: It takes little steps to build up to success.
• 11:15
  Speaker 5: Principal number three. Success is a pleasure.
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: If what you are doing today isn't satisfying or gratifying,
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: guess what, You're really not successful. If you are not
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: fulfilled with what you are doing today, you cannot possibly
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: be successful. It doesn't matter how many worldly possessions you own,
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: how many cars, how many toys, how much money.
• 11:39
  Speaker 5: If you are not.
• 11:40
  Speaker 4: Happy with your life as it is, you cannot be successful.
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: I know that success is a relative term. It means
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: different things to different people. To a school kid, success
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: may mean a star on his latest test. To a homemaker,
• 11:56
  Speaker 4: it probably means having a well run household and a
• 11:58
  Speaker 4: wonderful family. To a business person, it's most likely the
• 12:02
  Speaker 4: thrill of closing a major contract, the pride in accepting
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: a performance bonus or being named the top producing salesperson.
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: But the one testimonial you will hear from all successful
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: people is that they are happy with who they are
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: and what they are doing. They are content satisfied. Success
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: is a pleasure. What have you done today that makes
• 12:26
  Speaker 4: this day successful? Think about it, write it down. If
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: at the end of each day you can jot down
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: the things that have made it a good day, you
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: will soon see patterns forming.
• 12:37
  Speaker 5: This really is a.
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: Good habit to get into. When you can see a
• 12:40
  Speaker 4: pattern of pleasure, you'll know you're on the road to success.
• 12:44
  Speaker 4: So take note of mister Franklin's three principles of success.
• 12:48
  Speaker 4: Number one, big achievements come one step at a time,
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: one day at a time. Number two, you have the
• 12:55
  Speaker 4: power to mold your life. You can make it whatever
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: you want. You can shape it and re shape it.
• 13:01
  Speaker 4: And number three, success is measured through pleasure. This is
• 13:06
  Speaker 4: the key principle. You've got to be happy along the way.
• 13:10
  Speaker 4: You've got to learn to give yourself a pat on
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: the back. You need to tell yourself, I'm proud of
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: me today. You've got to learn to enjoy the process,