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An Unlikely Affair: Your Real Questions, Our Real Answers · Untraditionally Lala

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Hi Amber, Hilelah, Welcome to an Unlikely Affair.
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: Hi babes, welcome back to another episode. Hi babes, Hi,
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: how are you? Thank good?
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Now are you welcome back to an Unlikely Affair. I'm
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: so thrilled that we decided to do this, So we
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: we posted on socials that we now have voicemails that
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: you guys can call. We gave you the heads up
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: don't leave a voicemail if you don't want it played,
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: because that's the whole point of this. And just you
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: guys know that number is one eight four four six affair,
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: which is one eight four four six two three three
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: two four seven.
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: We're going to play the messages. I haven't heard any
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: of them.
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: And by the way, nothing is off limits, which is
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: going to make it so fun.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: Thank god, thank god. I don't like limits. I don't
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: like boxes. I want to mention it all.
• 0:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, I agree, but it makes it fun.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: I am curious because we I used to do voicemails
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: back in the day. Yeah, and it was like one
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: of my most favorite parts of the podcast. So the
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: fact that you and I decided like, yeah, let's just
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: like implement that, I can.
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: It's my favorite, and I can't wait to hear the voices.
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: The voices, it's the best, different than like a DM yeah,
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: or reading it from a paper like you actually had
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: to hear yeah, yeah, hear the tone because everything.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: How are you delivering this shit to me?
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: Is it in a brown paper bag or a perfectly
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: wrapped package with a bout?
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a surprise, and that's the thing. I love
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: a good surprise.
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: And by the way, no.
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: One leaves voice messages.
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: No, everyone hangs up before the voicemail and so now I.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: Love the whole point.
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I love leaving voice message because honestly, you just
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: keep them and when you miss someone.
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: Or I don't, I don't know.
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: It's just something nostalgic about leaving a voicemail. Someone's uh voicebox.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: What do you've called it in your voice box? Yeah,
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: something like the box. And no's no one's leaving messages.
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: But obviously there are people leaving messages, just two people,
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: because when you call somebody, if it gets to the
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: answering machine.
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: They go, so and so's mailbox is full.
• 2:12
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah, my voicemails sounds something like this. No, they sound
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: something like, hey, just checking in, thinking of you love you.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: Oh you're a quickie. Yeah, I'm a hang up in text.
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: Oh you should leave leave me a voice message.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: Please, If that's what you want, I will do that
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: for you.
• 2:29
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: All right, let's start us off. Let's start us off
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: with the first one yo.
• 2:33
  Speaker 5: Girls. My name is Ali. I'm calling from Rhode Island
• 2:37
  Speaker 5: and I would love your input from both of you.
• 2:40
  Speaker 5: Just feels super close to home and something you both
• 2:43
  Speaker 5: can relate to. I had an affair about two years
• 2:48
  Speaker 5: ago and got to ask for a divorce from my husband,
• 2:51
  Speaker 5: super controlling. We just really grew apart. And he is
• 2:55
  Speaker 5: a superior court judge in the state I reside in. Imagine,
• 3:00
  Speaker 5: no one wanted to take on my case. No one
• 3:02
  Speaker 5: wanted to go against the judge. And he has every
• 3:06
  Speaker 5: advantage in his backyard and this is his skill set.
• 3:10
  Speaker 5: I am a corporate badass. I'm very intelligent and capable,
• 3:14
  Speaker 5: but this man is physically exhausting me, going to course
• 3:18
  Speaker 5: for multiple contempt orders, holding every single piece of the
• 3:23
  Speaker 5: contract over my head, and he is draining me of
• 3:27
  Speaker 5: every single penny I have. All the while he has
• 3:31
  Speaker 5: a tension for the rest of his life. Two hundred
• 3:35
  Speaker 5: thousand dollars salary, so the day he dies and I
• 3:38
  Speaker 5: don't know what to do to get my power back.
• 3:41
  Speaker 5: I have been sober, I have been trying to be
• 3:44
  Speaker 5: clear headed and calm, but I physically and mentally and
• 3:48
  Speaker 5: emotionally do not know how to get past this motherfucker,
• 3:54
  Speaker 5: how to let him know that his fucking rain is
• 3:58
  Speaker 5: over and moved along. But more importantly, I just needed
• 4:02
  Speaker 5: to stop. And I don't know. I don't know what
• 4:06
  Speaker 5: I should do. I don't know how to get my
• 4:07
  Speaker 5: power back, and this motherfucker continues to ruin my life.
• 4:11
  Speaker 5: We've been divorced about two years now, and I can't
• 4:15
  Speaker 5: get them to let up. My name is Ali, and
• 4:18
  Speaker 5: I would love to talk through this. Thanks.
• 4:21
  Speaker 4: Oh my god, where do I begin? My heart is?
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: I feel like I could throw up? Okay, So thank
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: you for sending in that message.
• 4:32
  Speaker 4: Ali.
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: My legs are like a little bit numb because it
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: kind of brought me back to like the conversation we were
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: having about power and money, and you know, I get
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: a lot of feelings about like what's going on with
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: even are United States and the government and the Epstein files.
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: It's just wild to me, and it's like, how do you?
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: How do you when your back is against the wall.
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: But let me start by saying, is the fact that
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: you've been able to stay sober through all of this
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: because I didn't have that. I didn't have sobriety during
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: this time of my life when I went through my divorce.
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: Kudos to you, Like you're doing the right thing every
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: day by waking up and choosing not to numb yourself
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: and face him head on.
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, right, yes, but that doesn't I mean, here's the
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: hard thing about this is not only does he have money,
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: but his position of power is so in the mix
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: of the legal system, so he knows every loophole, he
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: knows exactly what he's doing as far as the financial
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: burden that she's going to face.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: He knows how to drag this out. He's just very
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: well versed.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: And then you add on, I can't get someone to
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: represent me.
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: And here's what I talk about a lot.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: Is that I have had the luxury of having a
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: platform where I can talk about these things and call
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: awareness and attention. Whereas you know, not everyone has that.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: Not there's not going to be people who hear about
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: this and bang on her door and say I want
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: to go get this motherfucker with you. But I would
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: say the first thing is I think you got to
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: find a badass female attorney m m mmm, and someone
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: who's hungry, who needs a notch in their belts.
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because at the end of the day, I feel
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: like I don't know how there's still another judge reading
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: this case. Right, They're both are going to go in
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: front of a judge. Yeah, so, and you can't.
• 6:42
  Speaker 4: You don't choose who your judge is at the time.
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: So there's that. But I agree with you.
• 6:46
  Speaker 3: I think she should go get a female badass attorney.
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: Maybe she could bring one in from another state. I
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: don't know the laws, but I would go to another site.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: I think they have to be registered as an attorney
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: with the bar in the state that you in. I think, now,
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: was this a divorce that there she has? They been
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: divorced for two years.
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: Though she's had she had an affair, right right, He
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: filed for a divorce and she's been in this crazy
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: divorce for two years because he won't let up.
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: And I don't know what it's like in Rhode Island.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: What I know in California is no one cares about
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: cheating the judges don't care about cheating. It plays there.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: It has no merit when it comes to the divorce process.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: I don't know what it's like in Rhode Island, if
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: you can look it up and see, but I have
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: to imagine if this guy is doing, uh, doing this
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: play by play? You know there there is a version
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: where you go in with a with a badass judge
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: and they say, if you continue to pull her into
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: this hole because of your because you're angry, you'll be
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: you'll be paying for her legal bills.
• 7:57
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: I just looked it up.
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: Rhode Island as a not no fault, the worst state,
• 8:02
  Speaker 3: so they could just divorce on reconcilable differences. Yeah, I
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: don't know the laws, but I'm really sorry that I know.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: But I'm feeling badly because I think she's looking to
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: us for advice and okay.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: So what would you do?
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: How about that in this situation, you're saying that you
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: would go out, you would find a female, a badass
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: female attorney it's able to look at.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: I would find someone who's flying under the radar who
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: needs a come up, because that's the person who's going
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: to say I'm going to go through all of this paperwork.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: I'm going to sit here and talk to you about
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: every fucking detail, and this is going to be the
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: case that puts me above the others. I took that
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: I went up against a powerful of course man. Yeah,
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: and that's what you have to find.
• 8:47
  Speaker 4: It's like the movie Lincoln Lawyer. Have you seen that?
• 8:50
  Speaker 6: Yes?
• 8:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like lincol Laurie.
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: That's what you need to go and do.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: And I think my biggest piece of advice for you
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: is you're in it right now, so you don't know
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: where to turn. And by the way, totally normal everybody,
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: even the strongest, most logical woman, when she is placed
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: in that situation. You have sobriety on your side, you
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: start to flounder because you don't know where to start.
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: I think you try your best to gain a thirty
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: thousand foot perspective and say what do I need to do?
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: First?
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: Start combing through every fucking law firm that is in
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: your reach, and you cold call and you basically lead
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: your case and hopefully someone says someone, I'm willing to
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: take that on.
• 9:36
  Speaker 4: Someone is someone.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: You have people who are murderers that can find attorneys.
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: You certainly can find someone who says, let's fucking go
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: get eddy.
• 9:45
  Speaker 4: Look at Jeffrey Epstein.
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: All these motherfuckers all found attorneys, of course them. So
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: there are people that will represent not giving a shit
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: who's on the other side.
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: And by the way, I have something to prove. Yeah,
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: this guy, I wish we knew his name. We could
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: just blast some motherfucker I know, I know will be
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: the platform fucking disengage. We'll represent you. Yeah, right, here's
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: the deal.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: The man is bitter and angry, and he's trying to
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: bleed me dry because I broke his heart. Shit happens, Okay,
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: doesn't matter. You continue down this path, go for it.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: But you're also on the hook for.
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: Her legal fees.
• 10:28
  Speaker 4: All right, I love that.
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: And you said that Rhode Island isn't the whatever.
• 10:32
  Speaker 4: I bet.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: He's also trying to make sure she doesn't get a
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: part of his pension because she's very much entitled to that.
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: By the way, as long as he continues to work
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: get up. Yeah, me a bush.
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: But she says she's a very intelligent, strong business woman,
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: like she may do better than he does if he
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: only makes two hundred thousand dollars A thousand dollars gonna
• 10:52
  Speaker 3: get you nothing after taxes, and like it's like attorney.
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: You know how expensive attorneys are.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: I know, that's why you got to find someone who's
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: like they just want the notch in their belts.
• 11:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that this guy.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: And by the way, if you're if she if he's
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: like a controlling human, she's not the first woman that
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: has had bad experiences with him. It's really funny. It
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: takes one person to kind of pull out the thread
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: and then all of a sudden people come out of
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: the woodwork and they're like, I fucking hate this guy,
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: Like I want to take him down just as badly
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: as you do.
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: And the fact that he's a federal judge and he's
• 11:22
  Speaker 3: controlling that really disturbs me because that means that like
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: when he is on the stand and he's making cases,
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: Yes there's laws to follow, but like it just don't
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: know what kind of like personality you're going to get
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: on the stand this day.
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: I know, you know, and that's what scares me.
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: Mm hmm. All right, we'll start with the attorney. That's
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: what I think. Hopefully that was helpful. Sending you so
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: much love. Men, I just cannot I know, I know,
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: I'm really fucking struggling. I am too want to lean in,
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: but I don't. I want to stab them all.
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: You don't get it. It's all so much fun until
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: it isn't right.
• 12:11
  Speaker 7: Okay, next one, Hi, ladies, I just wanted to call
• 12:15
  Speaker 7: in and just take the opportunity to just share with
• 12:19
  Speaker 7: you that your perspectives, your stories, the talks that you
• 12:25
  Speaker 7: guys have definitely have really moved me and definitely made
• 12:30
  Speaker 7: you know, each week so enjoyable. Just the friendship that
• 12:35
  Speaker 7: you guys have been able to build over time and
• 12:38
  Speaker 7: work through. And I just wanted to just call in
• 12:41
  Speaker 7: and just express just the gratitude and.
• 12:45
  Speaker 8: Beauty that I see in the relationship that you both have.
• 12:48
  Speaker 8: I guess my question is, you know, how do you
• 12:51
  Speaker 8: guys basically make efforts to you know, through your traumas
• 12:57
  Speaker 8: and relationships. How do you guys just continue to like
• 13:01
  Speaker 8: stay positive and optimistic, you know, on sobriety and just
• 13:05
  Speaker 8: everything that's you know, fast coming.
• 13:08
  Speaker 4: Hey, love you guys.
• 13:09
  Speaker 5: Bye.
• 13:09
  Speaker 6: Hmm.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: You know it's funny that that came through right now,
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: because I don't feel like I've been able to maintain
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: even in my sobriety, even with all of the blessings
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: that I've been able to maintain being positive in the past.
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: I want to say a couple of weeks.
• 13:29
  Speaker 4: It's just a season.
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: You know, it's hard, it's hard, but think about it,
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: like ten years ago, eight years ago, you would have
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: been drinking right now, sitting here right and like the
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: gift of sobriety as you're actually able to like go
• 13:42
  Speaker 3: through it and stay sober and still show up for
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: your kids and be fucking present like you have the
• 13:48
  Speaker 3: last you know, two weeks. When you're feeling your feelings,
• 13:51
  Speaker 3: that's the blessing. Yeah, so like on your hardest day,
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: you would never trade today versus a that happened ten
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: twelve years ago.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: No, that's very true. I mean, how do you feel
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: about it? How do you when you're going through the struggles?
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: And I think there's something going on with the universe
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: right now, because everyone I've talked to has said, like
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: I wake up in sheer panic. Yeah, I feel like
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: there's either something going on in the universe or the
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: stars are just not in alignment.
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: But like.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: The things we've talked about on this podcast, because we
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: do kind of go through the motions of life and
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: what we experience how we've forgiven each other, how we
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: walk through the world without being so utterly traumatized that
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: we are on an island by ourselves. Like, how do
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: you get through those difficult moments? I know that we
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: can say sobriety, which is obviously fucking massive.
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: But for people who are normies, okay.
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: This is something I really lean on my girlfriends, and
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: I never was able. I didn't have that capacity because
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: I always had a really interesting relationship with females.
• 14:59
  Speaker 4: But I feel like.
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: If you have a good group of girls, could be one,
• 15:05
  Speaker 3: could be two, like whatever it is like.
• 15:08
  Speaker 4: Sometimes just opening.
• 15:10
  Speaker 3: Your mouth and sharing how you're feeling within those groups
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: and women that you feel safe with, I feel like
• 15:16
  Speaker 3: that's really it's just nice to like get it out.
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: And like sometimes when you get things out, you hear
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: yourself talking, and sometimes those answers just like come automatically.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: You're like, oh, wait, I think I just figured out
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: my own problem just by sitting down and.
• 15:30
  Speaker 4: Talking about it with girlfriends.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know.
• 15:32
  Speaker 5: For me.
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: You know, I come to you a lot, and I
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: think that that's why the day is that I'm not
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: having a great day. You're pulling eighty percent of the relationship. Yeah,
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: when you're like seventy percent or you know, I'm thirty percent,
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: like and that's exactly I think. Brene Brown actually talked
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: about that a lot, just in relationships in general, like.
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: You just have to lean on each other and know.
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: Oh oh, Like for me, I haven't been sleeping and
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: it's but I know it's going to pass, and I like,
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: I'm trying not to ruminate and like perseverate on the
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: fact that I haven't been able to sleep. So I
• 16:12
  Speaker 3: just have to think, like, Okay, I'm going to get
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: through this. I've been through hard things. I could do
• 16:16
  Speaker 3: hard things like just talking to yourself this morning when
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: I woke up and I was listening to a podcast
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: and the person was like, yeah, I say I love
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: you every day in the mirror, and I'm like, oh shit,
• 16:25
  Speaker 3: I didn't do that. I haven't done that in months,
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: and I used to do it, and I felt so good.
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: I was able to stop what I was doing and
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: look at myself in the mirror and say, like, I
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: love you, like I got you.
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: You're good.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: Even on days that you don't necessarily know if you
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: feel that way, If I.
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: Love myself, yeah, no, I fucking tell myself you're a
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: piece of shit.
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: Like it's hard, You're not.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: Every day is gonna be I'm gonna be emotionally aligned
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: and perfect and floating on cloud nine.
• 16:52
  Speaker 4: But I just get through the day.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: Just get through the day. Yeah, go for a walk,
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: call a friend, eat good food. Fine, if you want
• 17:00
  Speaker 3: a piece of cheesecake, have a piece of cheese, like
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: whatever your thate, Just like, do.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: Whatever you need to do to get through the emotion.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes, you coming into town with a saving grace
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: by the way.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: Really, Oh yeah, I've been in a bad spot. I
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: don't know if you do this, it happens to me.
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: I was talking to Ethan about it, like every other month,
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: and it's usually around like my period of course of
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: just self loathing. At night, I think about every wrong
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: move that I made that put me in a position
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: that didn't further me but set me back. And usually
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: I'm just like a little hustler, and I'm like, there's
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: nothing that I can't do. Everything is fixable. Every single
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: roadblock we can figure out.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: A way around it. Nothing's permanent.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: Right then, I hit these moments and they can last
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: for a couple of days, they can last for a
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: couple of weeks.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: We're going on. We're going on a week of me
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: just wanting this feeling to end.
• 18:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but you're human. You just have to accept it.
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: I'm human and I'm having a fucked up week. Yeah,
• 18:07
  Speaker 3: and sometimes it's a fucked up season. I literally think
• 18:11
  Speaker 3: I had ten crazy years of my life.
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: It just didn't stop. I was in what you're feeling.
• 18:17
  Speaker 3: For ten years when I was going through my divorce,
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: going back to family court, fighting for education and medical
• 18:24
  Speaker 3: rights over my daughter.
• 18:25
  Speaker 4: Like I'm shocked.
• 18:29
  Speaker 3: I'm sitting here and I'm not dead. But guess what
• 18:31
  Speaker 3: I fucking made it?
• 18:32
  Speaker 5: Yeah?
• 18:32
  Speaker 3: Like that will that should give you the strength to
• 18:36
  Speaker 3: know you've been through some crazy hard stuff and how
• 18:41
  Speaker 3: weird that I've blacked it out.
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: I'm like, no, that wasn't as hard as what I'm
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: going through right now, Like I couldn't even eat.
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, No, you're right.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: And then what's hard too, though, is that when you
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: share with like my mother is like an overly.
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: Positive person, which is great.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: I'm just list of it, but I did not get
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: that in my you know, genetic makeup, my mental makeup,
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: or I'll tell her all of the things that I
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: feel are fucking with me, And then she'll go into
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: look at everything that you've done, what you should be
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: so grateful? And then I'm like, well, now you're shaming me,
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: and I'm like I understand, Like I'm well aware.
• 19:22
  Speaker 4: You're like, sorry, wrong person, I'm talking to you.
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: I have a beautiful, healthy family, I got a roof
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: over my head, everything's functioning properly, like, I have nothing
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: to complain about.
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: But I just need you to stick with me on this.
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: I have a question.
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: Do you ever, whenever you're feeling it like you're in
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: a spiral, do you ever put yours? I say, I
• 19:42
  Speaker 3: say time out, I put myself in a town. Do
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: you ever just stop and go sit down and just
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: not do some weird fucking breathing meditation, but just say,
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: like what am I really upset about?
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: Yes?
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: And that's what's so fucked up about this past these
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: past week couple weeks, is that I feel like it's
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: so much that I haven't even been able.
• 20:06
  Speaker 2: To pinpoint the root of it.
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: Hmmm, Because the moment I say, Okay, this is what's
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: really bothering me, this is what it is, I go
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: I start spiraling on something else and I'm like, maybe
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: that's fucking the thing that's bothering me. More like, if
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: that were to work out, what I feel less upset
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: about this thing, and then it's just a whole new spiral,
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: which is why I haven't made any moves the past
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: couple weeks because.
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I can't do that.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: No, when you don't know what to do, sit and
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: do nothing, do nothing because clarity will come. It's always
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: come for me, even in my years of fucking drinking,
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: being like I'm only gonna drink wine. I only am
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: gonna have, you know, two cocktails. Maximum clarity always comes. Yeah,
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: it's just in my makeup. But I'm I'm ready for
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: it to come. I don't like the position I've been
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: in the past couple weeks. It's kicking my ass. It's coming.
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: Just surrender, Just let it go. It's all going to come, Okay,
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: all your answers are going to come. It's like you're
• 21:11
  Speaker 3: holding on so tight to whatever you think you want clarity,
• 21:15
  Speaker 3: which is a lot of different areas of life.
• 21:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you just have to let it go.
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: And I know that sounds so stupid and so and
• 21:22
  Speaker 3: I'm probably doing what Lisa does, where you're just like, oh,
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: it's just.
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: You know, no, you're not doing what she does. You're
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: not doing what she does.
• 21:28
  Speaker 4: It's just it's going to work out.
• 21:32
  Speaker 3: You could literally walk out of this door and like,
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: that's how quickly your life can change.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: One hundred percent. I always say, one day I had
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: a dad, the next day I didn't like. That's how
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: quickly shit happens.
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: Can I tell you.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: The other thing that I'm trying to reconcile is that
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: I have put myself and I love it. I'm very
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: grateful put myself into this world of entertainment where you
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: have to be out and about. You got to stay
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: relevant at the core of who I am. I am
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: not a social person. I don't want to be out
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: and about. I don't want people talking about me. I
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: don't like. But then I'm in a world where if
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: that stops, I run the risk of not being able
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: to support my family. So it's like I'm in such
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: a funky place right now because I'm like, I just
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: want to like be in a house off the grid,
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: delete the Instagram, Like I'm just craving just like normalcy.
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: And I know if that came, I'd crave the other
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: thing right, because we're in a state of.
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: You got a viirl.
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: Remember what I was saying, Like you have to find
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: like you have to stay neutral, to stay try to
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: stay neutral, and it's all going to change, to change
• 22:43
  Speaker 3: very quickly.
• 22:44
  Speaker 4: By the way, what did we just go through like.
• 22:46
  Speaker 6: A new.
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: Is that what it is?
• 22:49
  Speaker 4: Situation?
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: Anyway, let's bring in the new the next voicemail. I
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: want to listen to this spiral, by the way, because
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: now did I just manifest? Did I just manifest that
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: I don't want those things? I'm big on the manifesting.
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: Just say you're I'm I'm I'm a little lost.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: I'm going to need the universe to like just work
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: with me and put me in whatever position it's meant
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: for me to be in.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: That's it. I'm surrendering.
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: There we go.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: There, Okay, God, that.
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: Was so powerful it took us how long the last
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: fifteen minutes to say I surrender?
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: By the way, it could change when we walk out
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: the door and go to lunch, I could be fully
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: back in my spiral and go.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: But I didn't tell you about this.
• 23:38
  Speaker 9: Okay, Leah, My question is the beautiful ladies.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: I love her. Listen to your voice My name is.
• 23:44
  Speaker 6: Leah live in Jacksonville, Florida. I love you, La, La.
• 23:49
  Speaker 6: You make me really think about the things I say.
• 23:52
  Speaker 6: But anyway, I would love to know what the man
• 23:57
  Speaker 6: that we cannot speak his name thinks of losing the
• 24:02
  Speaker 6: two biggest baddies.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: What a fumble? I'm just saying.
• 24:07
  Speaker 6: Do you think he just sits there and just punches
• 24:10
  Speaker 6: to himself in the face sometimes like I lost the
• 24:12
  Speaker 6: two badest bitches I'll ever have m I.
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: Don't even think he has the mental comput I don't.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: Here's the thing about whose name we shall not mention.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: He doesn't possess what normal humans possess. He doesn't know
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: how to love, he doesn't know how to have like
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: deep rooted connection. Everything is just about hitting highs. So
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: I don't think he even thinks about like losing anybody,
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: because we were just possessions. He'll go find another, which
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: he did, and then he'll repeat the cycle. Because he's
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: a just a one trick pony. There's like transparent as
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: all get out.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: At this point, you fuck with him.
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: It's kind of on you, you know, one hundred percent
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: not thinking about you, And I No, I don't think
• 25:04
  Speaker 3: so either.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: But by the way, let me tell you something I think.
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: I So, I've been super chill recently, Like he'll ask
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: me things on.
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: The app and I don't even battle it.
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: And it's like, do you realize I'm not battling you,
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: because that's how badly I don't want to fucking talk
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: to you, Like I'm willing to just say okay, because I.
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: Don't want to fucking talk to you. Yeah, and he
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: will still try to battle with me. Oh sends me
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: the longest.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I cannot be bothered to read this because
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: I don't give one fuck about what you say.
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like no part of me that cares.
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: It's crazy to me though, how he'll do that to you.
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: And there's absolutely like this much communication between us, like
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: he wants to go at it with you, like he
• 25:55
  Speaker 3: wants anything. Mm hmm.
• 25:57
  Speaker 4: Maybe that will change next month.
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: But he tries to plug in and yeah, I ain't
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: the one, buddy, I ain't the one. Yeah, I don't
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: give a fuck.
• 26:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I just want east and happiness in whatever capacity
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: for everybody.
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: That's such a god.
• 26:17
  Speaker 3: That was really hard to say, but I said it.
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: It was I'm doing a good job.
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: I do.
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: I believe you, Miami, you say to me, with those
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: glasses on, I fucking believe.
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: You look like the smartest, hottest person. I know.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: Really yeah, you look like that anyway. But like with
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: the glasses on, what about now?
• 26:40
  Speaker 6: No?
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: Not the under boom so great?
• 26:46
  Speaker 4: Speaking of that, I'm not wearing a bra.
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: And let me tell you, there's nothing more free than
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: not having to wear a bra.
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: I love that.
• 26:52
  Speaker 3: I go to battle with my kids and my parents
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: about putting on a bra.
• 26:56
  Speaker 5: Fuck.
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: I don't want to wear a bra. I don't want
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: to wear a bra.
• 26:59
  Speaker 4: I guess what.
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: You don't have to make me, and I'm not gonna
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: let you make me. It is a free fucking country, ladies.
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: If you don't want to wear a bra, let your
• 27:07
  Speaker 3: tits be free, let your boobs hang lo dude, they
• 27:11
  Speaker 3: wobble broke.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: Can you tie them in?
• 27:13
  Speaker 4: Not?
• 27:13
  Speaker 3: Can you tie them?
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: Sorry?
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: I just went on a serious boot Bran.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: I'm obsessed with you today. I need to do so
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: much you guys. Thank you for listening to another episode.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: We're done. Yeah, we're done, babey you want to keep going?
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: I'm having so much fun?
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: All right, fine, it was so great. Let's go to lunch.
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: Oh, I'm sorry you have.
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: To take that call lunch. I don't give a fuck
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: about what's happening on here. All right, thank you guys
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: for listening to Go by the Love Bubble. That's where
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: we need to go.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: We're going to lunch.
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: I gotta talk to you about the DJ that I
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: just met.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: Oh, let's fucking go. Love you guys to another episode.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: I'm not like the affair. I gotta go Bye.