Latest / Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe / Jelly Bean Day! (Hoppe Hour With Ryan Hoppe: 4.22.26)

Transcript

Jelly Bean Day! (Hoppe Hour With Ryan Hoppe: 4.22.26) · Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe

• 0:00
  Coffee Hour starts live in less than 10 minutes.
• 0:02
  Stand by. No, no, no, no. There was something
• 0:14
  that was really sad that happened. There was
• 0:21
  a loss that was just too much to handle. Nobody
• 0:25
  in my family died. There was a loss. we had.
• 0:29
  Oh man. How do we start? I don't even know how
• 0:40
  to put it into words. I was in a situation ship
• 0:44
  for two years from January 2024 to December 2025.
• 0:52
  She was nine years older. She was hot as hell.
• 0:56
  But we went our separate ways. changed her Peacock
• 1:04
  password. She did delete my profile for the last
• 1:07
  four months. I was just, you know, watching Peacock
• 1:11
  on her brother's account, watching the NFL playoffs
• 1:13
  or the NBA playoffs allegedly. And last night
• 1:17
  I went to watch the Knicks -LN Hawks game and
• 1:22
  they unsubscribed. No! No! I have to pay 10 bucks
• 1:28
  a month now! No! It was a very sad moment when
• 1:33
  I realized that I just got paid. That I had to
• 1:36
  pony up $10. I remember when Peacock started
• 1:38
  at $2 .99 six years ago. Man, fuck that. But
• 1:44
  no. I can't pretend that I'm not my ex's brother
• 1:48
  anymore. But now I can actually watch the show.
• 1:51
  Because I was afraid that they would notice that
• 1:53
  somebody was watching Ted or something. Because
• 1:57
  it doesn't show the history of when you watch
• 1:58
  a live game. were complications like during the
• 2:03
  Super Bowl more than one person was using the
• 2:05
  Peacock account and I had to go somewhere to
• 2:07
  watch it. So it wasn't without its, you know,
• 2:10
  controversies like this segment. But yes, rest
• 2:15
  in peace to my ex's Peacock account. You will
• 2:22
  be missed and I'll be getting rid of Peacock
• 2:25
  once the NBA ends at the end of the year. That
• 2:32
  was karma because when me and my, so that was
• 2:37
  a situation ship, but when me and my girlfriend
• 2:39
  four years ago broke up, I deleted her off the
• 2:42
  HBO Max account. So that was karma for me. But
• 2:47
  yeah, I was like, why is it not showing the NBA
• 2:50
  playoffs? So I logged into Peacock last night
• 2:53
  and it's like showing like Shrek. And I was like,
• 2:56
  why is it not showing the NBA? And then I was
• 2:57
  like, oh, they discontinued. The real prank I
• 3:01
  could have done is I could have literally, you
• 3:04
  know, done the thing where I subscribed. And
• 3:08
  that was logged in. But I'm a nice guy. You ain't
• 3:13
  going to get a D like me anymore. But not really.
• 3:15
  But you know what's funny? I have a cold. I have
• 3:20
  not had a cold, ladies and gentlemen, boys and
• 3:22
  girls, in like two years. And right now, I am
• 3:26
  sniffing. I'm having a hard time doing my signature
• 3:29
  laugh of... There, I did it. But sometimes when
• 3:33
  I do it, there's a little mucus, you know? There's
• 3:35
  a little bit of, like, boogers in the nose. Like...
• 3:38
  Like, right when I just did that, a freaking
• 3:42
  booger just dropped down. It was gross. It's
• 3:44
  disgusting. But it sucks about the Midwest. You
• 3:48
  get cold! Well, that's probably not helping my
• 3:51
  voice. I saw this headline here and I kind of
• 3:57
  knew this was gonna happen but I still couldn't
• 4:01
  believe it. You know what it is? We all know
• 4:08
  that Michael Jackson is probably a pedophile.
• 4:11
  If you're a kiss -ass fan of his, he wouldn't
• 4:14
  piss on you if you're on fire. He'd piss on you
• 4:17
  sexually. And I'm telling you, we all know he
• 4:20
  was guilty. And supposedly, they left that part
• 4:23
  out of the movie. Just two years after Michael
• 4:26
  Jackson's song Black or White, which is about
• 4:28
  unity, was released, fans were divided when he
• 4:31
  was accused of child molestation. Allegation.
• 4:33
  Yeah! That was the time as a kid where I learned
• 4:36
  what a pedophile was. My parents were so uncomfortable
• 4:40
  in the car. They didn't know what to say. Because
• 4:43
  he's a pedophile. And that's all he is. And he
• 4:46
  consistently denied. Michael! Michael! Of course
• 4:49
  he's going to deny it. What's he going to say?
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  Michael! Somebody who obtained the biopic's original
• 4:57
  script reports any scenes that depicted the Dark
• 5:00
  Chapter in Jackson's life had to be cut. Oh,
• 5:03
  yeah! Because why? Why have an honest documentary?
• 5:07
  He was found innocent! So in the movie, it would
• 5:11
  be that he won. Even though I don't believe he's
• 5:13
  innocent. But all the Michael Jackson fans that
• 5:17
  are giant accent boomers are so frickin' whipped
• 5:20
  by him. Let's just rewrite the past. According
• 5:27
  to Variety sources, a sequence where investigators
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  arrive at Jackson's Neverland Ranch searching
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  for evidence was one of many removed from the
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  film due to legal reasons. I'm sure the legal
• 5:37
  reasons are they didn't want to hit it. It's
• 5:40
  a part of his life! Cut. Those changes in the
• 5:44
  film directed by Antoine Fuqua reportedly resulted
• 5:47
  in a $10 -15 million 22 -day reshoot. Oh yeah,
• 5:51
  they gotta reshoot it. Why hide? And why be honest?
• 5:56
  adding to the film's already $155 million budget.
• 6:00
  Listen, I loved, I had his box set. It was like
• 6:03
  a big white box set and I loved his music. And
• 6:05
  once I found out more about him, he just creeps
• 6:07
  me out, man. He gives me bad vibes. Creeps me
• 6:13
  out, man. It's not good vibes. I don't look at
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  Michael Jackson and go, oh yeah, I want to hang
• 6:20
  out with him. I used to do videos. I didn't get
• 6:24
  the million dollar budgets. I got the $50 ,000.
• 6:27
  All right, I can't play any more of this because
• 6:28
  it's got copyright. But yeah, you all enable
• 6:31
  it. And you all covered it up. It's ridiculous.
• 6:39
  There you are. And finally on Hoppy Hour, I can't
• 6:43
  stand narcissistic people that work in media,
• 6:47
  that treat everybody like crap. They yell at
• 6:50
  people behind the scenes. Many of the people
• 6:52
  I've worked with have done this. At Alex Cooper's
• 6:56
  Unwell Network, that's the home of Call Her Daddy,
• 6:59
  TMZ says it's more like I Yell Network. Alex
• 7:03
  Cooper's husband has a reputation for berating
• 7:06
  and yelling at staffers working on her network.
• 7:09
  He oversees the day -to -day operations. Dude!
• 7:13
  If you're yelling at people, I'm sure you underpay
• 7:16
  them, and I'm sure Alex Cooper keeps all the
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  money. You look like a douchebag. You look like
• 7:22
  somebody I wouldn't want to hang out with. You're
• 7:24
  a moron. You're a bully. And you're hanging around
• 7:27
  your annoying wife that thinks she's better than
• 7:30
  everybody, even though we're all going to die
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  at the end of the day. You're literally bringing
• 7:35
  your staffers to tears. You're bringing your
• 7:38
  staffers to tears. that they'll never work in
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  Hollywood again if they messed up. If you care
• 7:45
  that somebody is going to go work somewhere else,
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  you're a sociopathic moron. And when you die,
• 7:51
  everyone's going to go, oh yeah, Alex Cooper's
• 7:54
  essentially nepo husband was a douchebag. And
• 7:58
  I'm sure you never cheat on Alex, you freaking
• 8:01
  idiot. You make all men look bad, you douchebag.
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  Oh yeah, we are live from... it tonight let's
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  get into it doors closing hi this is ryan hoppy's
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  mom and you're listening to hoppy hour welcome
• 8:33
  back to hoppy hour with ryan hoppy Yes, now.
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  What? Now, now, now, now. If I hit this button,
• 8:44
  boom, the whole program's going to start. Okay,
• 8:47
  well, hit it. All right. Hoppy Hour starts in
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  four, three, two, hoppy, hoppy, hoppy. This is
• 9:08
  Hoppy Hour with Hoppy. Got it. Got it. Got it.
• 10:38
  Oh yeah! That's me! Oh yeah! What's going on?
• 11:02
  Got it! Oh, yeah, I love my women. They make
• 11:16
  me feel good. It's all the arguments. Right here.
• 11:28
  Got it. I'm a little drunk. Oh, yeah. Oh, the
• 11:45
  masturbation memories in here is crazy. Oh, yeah.
• 11:56
  It's been very interesting. Being in a state
• 12:00
  where no one knows who I am. Besides the people
• 12:03
  that made fun of me in high school. I'm very
• 12:07
  anonymous here. I don't have some random redneck.
• 12:11
  I don't have some random redneck. Coming up to
• 12:12
  me, asking me about some fab morning show hosts.
• 12:14
  No, not at all. If you can already tell a little
• 12:17
  bit, today is going to be a little unhinged.
• 12:21
  It's going to be off the wall. I just poured
• 12:26
  like one -sixth of a handle of Tennessee Jack
• 12:31
  Daniels Tennessee whiskey into this cup. What
• 12:36
  does the cup say? It's just a white cup. Right
• 12:39
  there, and I got a mix to it. Rockstar energy.
• 12:42
  So let me get faded before I talk about my day.
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  You ready? If you got a drink in your hand or
• 12:49
  something you're going to smoke or maybe even
• 12:51
  trip on, let's all do it together. Life is short,
• 12:55
  and we could be dead tomorrow. So let's do it.
• 12:58
  All right. Oh, yeah. It's like my two gulfs in
• 13:03
  this Jack Daniels. Ready to go. All right. Every
• 13:07
  time I take a sip today, I'm going to let you
• 13:10
  guys know. Honestly, listen to me. If you're
• 13:14
  listening right now and you're on your way home
• 13:16
  and you're like, man, it sounds like Hoppy's
• 13:19
  having fun. I want to get faded with him. Turn
• 13:21
  the podcast off. Turn on whatever you got and
• 13:25
  listen when you go home because you're going
• 13:27
  to want to be faded. I already can't talk. Today
• 13:32
  is going to be one of those shows that tomorrow
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  when I'm a little hungover and not manic on my
• 13:37
  bipolar, I'll be listening back like, why did
• 13:41
  I do that? But anyway, let's talk about my day.
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  So the last time I checked in with you folks.
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  It was Monday where none of my day really went
• 13:58
  planned besides seeing my grandpa's brother,
• 14:00
  my great uncle Ken, his lovely wife, his lovely
• 14:03
  wife, Aunt Jane. And then there was miscommunication
• 14:09
  with one of my friends who works about an hour
• 14:11
  away. He does two radio jobs where he gets up
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  at 3 a .m. So I started driving towards Neolithic
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  and then he's like, oh, I'm not there. But I'm
• 14:20
  telling you, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
• 14:21
  during that car ride, I appreciated my mom. And
• 14:25
  frankly, it made me appreciate Florida. Why?
• 14:28
  Because when you're not in the Chicago area,
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  Illinois is no different than Missouri. It's
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  no different than Indiana. It's no different
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  than Wisconsin. It's no different than Iowa.
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  It's no different than Michigan. It's no different
• 14:43
  than Ohio. What do I mean by that? It's boring.
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  It's a bunch of cornfields and trees. Sure, it's
• 14:50
  pretty, but it makes you want to speed. Because
• 14:52
  it's kind of like melancholy. It's kind of sleepy.
• 14:55
  When you're around big buildings, you're like,
• 14:57
  oh yeah, I'm in the city of Chicago. When you're
• 15:01
  driving the new Lenox, oh no, not so much. So
• 15:05
  yesterday, I had lunch, and I know they're listening,
• 15:08
  hi guys, to my aunt and my godmom that all keep
• 15:12
  anonymous. But all All I'll say is my aunt and
• 15:16
  my uncle are badasses. My uncle worked for the
• 15:19
  city of Chicago for 30 years. And it's kind of
• 15:22
  the reason I'm into talk radio because he told
• 15:24
  me about Steve Dahl and Howard Stern. And he
• 15:27
  warned me that Rover was the copycat of Howard
• 15:30
  Stern. And I didn't listen. And my aunt, she
• 15:34
  worked for a major company that runs with smears.
• 15:38
  And it went out of business. And she was one
• 15:40
  of the first female bosses in the Midwest. And
• 15:43
  to my Tampa Bay listeners, you know the former
• 15:45
  Smear store? I'll just say it's Sears. On Tyrone
• 15:49
  Boulevard in St. Pete and the one at West Shore
• 15:51
  Mall, she was in charge of that. She's a badass
• 15:54
  female. So I went to Moratti's with them. I got
• 16:00
  deep dish pizza. And then I stayed at home, got
• 16:03
  tipsy on this margarita stuff, the Kirkland brain
• 16:06
  from Costco, and I had that. Then my mom's friends,
• 16:10
  Jane and Jim, came over. They're also my friends.
• 16:12
  I've known them since I was born and we had Chinese
• 16:15
  food and we talked about life. And then I watched
• 16:18
  the NBA playoffs on my Peacock account because
• 16:21
  my ex -situationship had to cancel her situationship
• 16:24
  of having Peacock. So today. I woke up a little,
• 16:32
  I woke up at like 8 .30 a .m. and my mom was
• 16:35
  at daily mass because she's adorable. My mom
• 16:38
  does this thing every other day, it seems like,
• 16:42
  where she goes to church. Oh, she loves her Roman
• 16:46
  Catholicism. And she's a good Catholic because
• 16:50
  she's not hateful towards gays. And it's anti
• 16:55
  -pedophilia. But my mom today, she went to church
• 16:59
  and I woke up at 8 .30. And I had been a little
• 17:02
  behind. Let me turn off the church. It's creeping
• 17:04
  me out. Father Bob, please don't touch me. Anywho.
• 17:10
  Can you tell I'm a little tipsy? This is definitely
• 17:14
  not one of those shows you send to a program
• 17:16
  director. Or maybe you do. Because it's real
• 17:18
  radio. All right. Here's how this goes. So yesterday.
• 17:23
  My mom went to church or today she went to church
• 17:26
  and I got up and I said, I am behind on schedule.
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  I haven't done anything I really wanted to do.
• 17:33
  So no, I didn't. I got dressed. And first of
• 17:37
  all, our childhood house is like 35 years old.
• 17:41
  So we're having toilet problems where we have
• 17:45
  this like toilet. toilet lube we put in the toilet
• 17:47
  takes the liquid and it helps it flush the next
• 17:50
  time i've been doing it but i took a big crap
• 17:53
  this morning because that's what you do in chicago
• 17:55
  the crops i take in florida are a little more
• 17:57
  you know normal i mean all the food you eat and
• 18:00
  all the beer you drink in chicago oh my goodness
• 18:02
  i clog up toilets oh geez so what happened was
• 18:06
  This morning, I went to the bathroom, and I'm
• 18:08
  a girl about it. Some radio shows survive off
• 18:11
  of fecalogical or, you know, whatever the word
• 18:16
  is, scatological humor about poop. You can tell
• 18:18
  I'm a little drunk. I don't. I want to go to
• 18:21
  the bathroom and forget it ever happened. Well,
• 18:25
  this morning, the toilet would not flush, and
• 18:27
  I'm just looking at what I created. It's like,
• 18:29
  oh, my God, please go away. I know I had four
• 18:33
  egg rolls last night. So finally that went away.
• 18:36
  So then I was like, I need to get out of the
• 18:37
  hot room in a minute, man. So the last few years,
• 18:42
  I have been unable to go to Harper College, WHCM,
• 18:46
  88 .3. Why? Because I'm lazy. The front entrance.
• 18:50
  Because when you have construction in Illinois.
• 18:54
  problem is it never gets fixed i'm convinced
• 18:57
  it's nothing more and nothing less than money
• 19:01
  laundering what do i mean by that they've been
• 19:04
  working on this construction at my former community
• 19:08
  college for like the past 10 years nothing gets
• 19:13
  done the same with on the highway so I asked
• 19:18
  Chad GVT, I said, hey, the front entrance of
• 19:21
  building A is blocked off and I want to get to
• 19:24
  WHCM radio. Can I, is there another way to go?
• 19:27
  And he goes, yeah, drive in the back. And I go,
• 19:29
  I should have figured that out. I don't think
• 19:31
  it's just like you can't get in the building
• 19:32
  A because they're working on something. So I
• 19:35
  drive to the back. I go into the university with
• 19:38
  my mom. I've visited Harper College in like the
• 19:41
  last, let's say 14 years, maybe three times.
• 19:44
  And it's very different now. When I was on WHCM
• 19:48
  88 .3, it was the worst radio you ever heard.
• 19:52
  Why? Because I had a stutter. I have a stutter
• 19:56
  now, but I had a real bad stutter. But the best
• 19:58
  part about that time was that everyone left me
• 20:01
  alone because no one else was on air and I was
• 20:03
  able to do my thing. Well, I got in trouble for
• 20:08
  talking about the Pope. And I said, who cares
• 20:12
  who he puts as a Pope? He's just going to cover
• 20:14
  up pedophilia. And my boss did not appreciate
• 20:17
  that. So then I ended up doing my podcast, going
• 20:21
  to a radio school. But I'm getting to the point
• 20:23
  that on my social media, I visited WHCM 88 .3.
• 20:27
  And it is so different now. I've thought about
• 20:30
  asking them to syndicate my show and whatnot.
• 20:33
  Oh, my goodness. Back when I was there 14 years
• 20:38
  ago, we were playing like country shit. I forget
• 20:43
  the name of the rapper, but Ludacris is in it.
• 20:45
  Now, they're like so professional and so put
• 20:49
  together. It was off -putting. That was my station
• 20:54
  for six months until I got kicked off. Not the
• 20:56
  first station I've been kicked off of. So I went
• 20:58
  there and I got the picture and I noticed that
• 21:01
  my Tampa Bay sense of humor does not work in
• 21:04
  Chicago, man. I think it comes from working with
• 21:08
  shock jocks like Rover and Mike Calta and being
• 21:11
  around countless comedians that I have good one
• 21:14
  liners. But if you don't know me, you don't know
• 21:17
  that I'm joking. So there is a lovely girl, probably
• 21:20
  23, who is in charge of WHCM 88 .3 Harper College
• 21:24
  Radio. And the door was wide open. It's on the
• 21:27
  second floor in the teen center. And I didn't
• 21:31
  want to just go in and take a picture, especially
• 21:33
  because I'm going to tag them. They're going
• 21:34
  to be like, when the hell is this guy here? Who
• 21:36
  let him in? So I went to the front desk and I
• 21:40
  said, hey, is it cool if I get a picture at WHCM
• 21:43
  88 .3? And this really cute girl was like, well,
• 21:49
  I don't have the authorization to let you in,
• 21:51
  but you can email the whatever, whatever. And
• 21:54
  then luckily, my mom was sitting on one of the
• 21:56
  tables outside. And she was like, hey, someone
• 21:58
  just walked in there. So I go in there. I introduce
• 22:01
  myself. I'm like, hi. I was at WHCM 88 .3 about
• 22:06
  14 years ago. And could I get a picture? So they
• 22:09
  took me to the back where the radio board used
• 22:12
  to be. And it's on my social media, at Ryan Hoppy
• 22:14
  Radio. I actually took a picture of myself. Here's
• 22:19
  where it got weird. Mm -hmm. Ryan Hoppy making
• 22:23
  it weird? No way. What happened was this. I said,
• 22:28
  oh, yeah, because I wasn't just going to, you
• 22:29
  know, break in and take a picture. And she goes,
• 22:32
  oh, yeah, please don't do that. But I was joking.
• 22:35
  I wasn't really going to break in and take a
• 22:37
  picture. And that was kind of when the conversation
• 22:40
  ended. And I thought about it for 10 minutes,
• 22:43
  and I'm thinking about it now six hours later.
• 22:45
  I'm not really going to break in. I'm kidding.
• 22:50
  So then I'm feeling pretty motivated. Mm -hmm.
• 22:53
  But my mom, God bless her heart, she has a Honda
• 22:56
  SUV where, you know, when you're looking for
• 22:58
  your car in a parking lot, if you hit the button
• 23:00
  to lock the car, you can figure out where you
• 23:02
  parked. My 2015 Honda Accord, because I'm such
• 23:06
  a badass baller driving an 11 -year -old Honda
• 23:09
  Accord. Vroom, vroom. Yeah, well, I went, whenever
• 23:12
  I look for it, I go, boop, boop, boop, boop.
• 23:14
  And the noise goes, bop. It's very loud. You
• 23:17
  can find it anywhere. I can hear it from inside
• 23:18
  my house. My mom's car, it's like six years younger
• 23:22
  than mine. It goes, bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh. So
• 23:28
  we had a hard time finding the car and it's starting
• 23:31
  to get hotter. So we found the car. So then I
• 23:34
  went, Mom, we got to go to Smoke Depot. I got
• 23:39
  to get some kava, some matronite kava, because
• 23:42
  it's been outlawed in the suburbs of Chicago.
• 23:45
  Because that's the important thing. Outlawed
• 23:47
  kava and kratom. Now you know fixing the roads,
• 23:50
  the potholes I've gone over, and making things
• 23:53
  affordable for my generation. Getting rid of
• 23:55
  kava and kratom. Good job, boomer politicians,
• 23:59
  because that's the important thing, especially
• 24:01
  because those little pills that RFK was against,
• 24:04
  everyone wraps them into kava and create them,
• 24:07
  even though that's a different thing. If you
• 24:09
  guys did any research, you would know it's not.
• 24:13
  Anywho, so what happened was this. We went to
• 24:16
  Harwood Heights. I got some kava. And I went,
• 24:21
  mom, I want to go to Northwestern University.
• 24:23
  Now, I did not go to Northwestern University.
• 24:25
  I never would have made it in. But in 2013, you
• 24:29
  could send out mass messages on LinkedIn. And
• 24:31
  I applied to be on the rock show at WNUR 89 .3
• 24:37
  FM. And guess what happened? After Jim RKO, this
• 24:44
  radio DJ, quit, I was still on the mailing list.
• 24:47
  So the badass former program director known as
• 24:50
  Soren Nelson, he allowed me to be on air even
• 24:55
  though I wasn't a student there. And I did the
• 24:58
  Hoppy and Superidge show with my former co -host,
• 25:01
  Ryan Sturbridge, who I wish would get back to
• 25:03
  me at some point. Mm -hmm. So I drove 45 minutes
• 25:07
  to Northwestern, and I feel so bad. If the guy
• 25:10
  is listening, don't take this personally. I don't
• 25:13
  even remember my name. But it was this nice guy,
• 25:16
  probably 45 years old, and he runs WNUR 89 .3.
• 25:20
  And whenever I've visited Chicago the last five
• 25:22
  times, it's always been in August, so Northwestern's
• 25:26
  not in season. Well, I got to go to the studio
• 25:29
  where I got to get my big break with the Hoppy
• 25:32
  and Super Rich Show. And oh my God, the best
• 25:38
  part was that room has not changed. When I went
• 25:41
  to Harper Radio, they upgraded to the 2020s.
• 25:46
  The equipment at WNUR still is elite, but it's
• 25:49
  more 2010 equipment. And the same tapes and the
• 25:53
  same vinyls were up. And I felt like I was 21
• 25:56
  years old again getting in the radio. It was
• 26:00
  a good time. And I could tell the guy was overwhelmed
• 26:02
  by myself. Now, I was not talking like I am currently
• 26:05
  because I wasn't drinking. But my goodness, I
• 26:08
  was so excited to be in that room. And that picture
• 26:11
  is on WNUR 89 .3 FM. And Northwestern, it's on
• 26:16
  Ryan Hobby Radio on social media. The station's
• 26:18
  WNUR 89 .3 FM. So Northwestern University is
• 26:22
  a beautiful university that's on the water and
• 26:26
  Evanston. And I took a selfie as well. where
• 26:30
  you get to see downtown Chicago as well in the
• 26:32
  background. And the best part about it, ladies
• 26:35
  and gentlemen, boys and girls, was I thought
• 26:36
  of the memories when I used to smoke before the
• 26:39
  show outside in five degree weather. It was a
• 26:43
  good time. So in honor of smoking, because I've
• 26:47
  done a little today, I got the munchies. So I
• 26:49
  said to my mom, hey. We should go to Gene and
• 26:51
  Jude's, which that is a place, if you ever visit
• 26:55
  Chicago, I have a PSA for you. Gene and Jude's
• 26:58
  is the best hot dog around. No, it's not Portillo's.
• 27:02
  No, it's not Super Dog. It's Gene and Jude's.
• 27:08
  And me and my mom went there today and it was
• 27:11
  great, but I got a PSA for you, a public service
• 27:14
  announcement. Maybe it's an HSA, a happy service
• 27:17
  announcement for you. Are you ready? I'm going
• 27:20
  to tell you it. If you go to Gene and Jude's
• 27:24
  or any hot dog place, do not ask for ketchup.
• 27:28
  We don't have ketchup in Chicago. It ruins a
• 27:31
  hot dog. We put a bunch of vegetables and mayonnaise,
• 27:36
  not mayonnaise, and mustard on it and put french
• 27:39
  fries in it. It's so fucking good. So in seventh
• 27:43
  grade, I had to get a physical for gym class
• 27:46
  or something. So my dad drove me to Dr. Schultz
• 27:49
  or whatever his name was, Dr. Walsh. He was near
• 27:52
  Chicago and my dad didn't like taking the highway,
• 27:55
  even though I liked what he did because I could
• 27:57
  see the billboards. I love billboards because
• 27:59
  it's pretty social media and it was something
• 28:01
  to look at, but he would take the side route.
• 28:03
  And in seventh grade in 2007, my dad took me.
• 28:08
  to good old Gene and Jude's. And I did not know
• 28:11
  that a true Chicagoan does not have the thing
• 28:15
  that's known as ketchup on a hot dog. And there
• 28:18
  was no ketchup on my hot dog. And I said to the
• 28:21
  guy, I said, hey, can I have some ketchup? And
• 28:23
  he said, hey, what the fuck's wrong with you?
• 28:25
  In a Chicago accent, which I don't really need
• 28:27
  to impersonate a Chicago accent because I have
• 28:30
  one. And that's when I learned that true Chicagoans
• 28:36
  don't have hot dogs with ketchup. So today I
• 28:41
  got two double dogs with French fries and it
• 28:45
  was quite delicious. It's crazy. B96, the radio
• 28:50
  station that got me into radio. Now I'm more
• 28:52
  of a 1035 Kiss FM guy because of my homie known
• 28:55
  as Fred. who's got the best radio show throughout
• 28:59
  America, and I'm not just saying that to kiss
• 29:01
  his ass. Even though I'm kissing his ass, I'm
• 29:03
  not just saying that. But I did listen to P96
• 29:06
  a little bit, and it's weird that they're playing
• 29:08
  more of the throwbacks now, because Odyssey Radio
• 29:10
  got rid of 104 .3 Jams, and I'm driving around,
• 29:13
  and the song Grills comes on, a Paul Wall girl,
• 29:17
  and I'm driving around the hometown I grew up
• 29:19
  in with my mom, and I feel like the sixth grader
• 29:22
  again. Hearing songs that were on the radio on
• 29:26
  that exact station. Only my hero Jobo is dead
• 29:29
  and Eddie's on 96 .7. And I could possibly never
• 29:35
  forgive B96 for how they got rid of Jobo and
• 29:39
  Eddie. I know life is short and I was 18 going
• 29:42
  on 19 years ago, but I'm still mad. But that
• 29:46
  is the recap. Of my day today. And now I'm in
• 29:49
  my childhood room. Looking at all my Chicago
• 29:52
  banners. The 1984 Chicago Cubs. The 2010 Stanley
• 29:57
  Cup champion Blackhawks. The Chicago Fire. The
• 30:00
  Bears. The teams we don't talk about. The 2007
• 30:04
  and 2008 Chicago Cubs. Because they didn't win
• 30:06
  diddly squat. The team we do talk about. The
• 30:09
  2016 Cubs. And then some ManCon memorabilia.
• 30:12
  This is my room. And I had a lot of self -pleasuring
• 30:16
  in here and figuring out who I am listening to
• 30:18
  the radio. So it's very nostalgic being in here.
• 30:22
  All right. That was the opening segment of what's
• 30:25
  going on in my life. Now, let's get the celebrity
• 30:31
  news. Today on TMZ. Okay, there was a spice raid
• 30:38
  in LA. Oh, yeah. ice spice she's so trashy man
• 30:44
  she's just she looks like a case of hpv attacked
• 30:48
  at a mcdonald's what is interesting about this
• 30:51
  yeah is there's some traitorous conduct here
• 30:54
  she said this would never happen at wendy's because
• 30:57
  are you serious you can barely get a freaking
• 31:03
  Cheeseburger after 10 p .m. at Wendy's. It's
• 31:05
  pretty trashy too, honey. He is currently working
• 31:08
  with Wendy's as a partner. To be honest, this
• 31:10
  video made me want McDonald's. It made me want
• 31:13
  Wendy's. I'll be honest. The other day, I had
• 31:16
  McDonald's with my mom because she's a woman,
• 31:18
  got really hungry. So I went to McDonald's at
• 31:21
  Hollywood Heights. And like I said yesterday,
• 31:24
  I got a double cheeseburger. It was like $79
• 31:27
  million. And I got a double fish filet. It was
• 31:30
  like $78 million. But oh my God, as much as you
• 31:34
  can hit on the price of McDonald's, it's the
• 31:37
  best fast food. What time do you eat fast food?
• 31:39
  Uh, no, that's not fast food. He was about to
• 31:41
  say Spago. So the singer David has now been charged
• 31:46
  with the murder of - Shut up. He's a thug. He's
• 31:50
  a loser. I know you have no remorse because you're
• 31:54
  a psychopath, but you ruined your whole life.
• 31:57
  You were headlining Coachella last year, and
• 32:00
  then you had sex and killed a 14 -year -old girl
• 32:03
  like a loser. And I don't care if you were touched
• 32:06
  as a kid. It's not an excuse. Celeste Rivas.
• 32:09
  He is facing life without the possibility of
• 32:12
  parole or the death penalty. And it's poor Celeste
• 32:16
  Rivas' family. Totally pimped her out. A legal
• 32:20
  team that says there's no proof that David killed
• 32:23
  her. I'm not. Oh, yeah. Then besides the chopped
• 32:25
  up body in a Tesla. Shut the hell up. Sure that
• 32:29
  they're going to limit it to that. They may say
• 32:31
  there's no proof anybody killed her. Coachella
• 32:33
  weekend to blue weekend one out of the water.
• 32:37
  I ask for the copyright. Here's what Coachella
• 32:40
  sounded like. Even if Sabrina Carpenter's a hot
• 32:45
  piece of ass, her and Madonna perform together.
• 32:47
  That'd be a fun threesome. Justin Bieber brought
• 32:49
  out Billie Eilish. He also brought out SZA, Sexy
• 32:53
  Red, and Big... Oh, yeah, you know, he banged
• 32:56
  Sexy Red. Oh, yeah, he's totally not cheating
• 32:59
  on Hailey Bieber, the same wife that's a side
• 33:02
  chick. Oh, he's been totally faithful, like that
• 33:06
  picture of them in the club cuddling. He's totally
• 33:08
  not been inside of her. Sean. God bless Big Sean.
• 33:12
  God did bless Big Sean. Yes, he did. Summer House
• 33:17
  stars Amanda Batula and Wes. Bunch of losers.
• 33:20
  Wilson took their love to the baseball game.
• 33:23
  Oh, look at them making out on the kiss cam at
• 33:25
  the Yankees. Yuck. Good for them. No way. What
• 33:29
  is it that upsets Sierra? Because you called
• 33:32
  this guy. I don't want to hear about those eggs.
• 33:34
  I don't care. I like Jersey Shore. I'm kind of
• 33:38
  into the Mormon wives, but those summer house
• 33:40
  shows just ick me out. There's nothing interesting
• 33:44
  about them. There's nothing unique. They're all
• 33:47
  just a bunch of morons. Mm -hmm. Whoa! Happy
• 33:51
  Hot Topic! Why Zoe Kravitz and Harry Styles are
• 33:56
  sparking engagement rumors. Oh, yeah. You know
• 33:59
  they plow each other hard. The pair are fueling
• 34:02
  speculation after the daughter of Lisa Bonet
• 34:04
  and Lenny Kravitz was seen wearing a diamond
• 34:06
  ring on her left ring finger. She looks like
• 34:08
  she'd be fun in bed. Like she would just bring
• 34:13
  the absolute ruckus. Photos published by The
• 34:16
  Sun April 21st show the actress sporting the
• 34:19
  head -turning piece of jewelry while on a coffee
• 34:21
  date. Oh, she needs to eat a cheeseburger. She's
• 34:23
  a little too skinny for me. With Harry in London.
• 34:27
  They reached out for comment and didn't hear
• 34:29
  back. That's an ongoing problem with E! News.
• 34:32
  I'm going to be honest. If you consistently say
• 34:36
  that you reached out and you didn't hear back,
• 34:39
  that's a you problem. 856 -49 -Hobby. I don't
• 34:47
  even think I've taken a breath yet. But I don't
• 34:49
  care. When I'm in Chicago, I talk like how people
• 34:52
  in Chicago talk like. Like jackasses. When I'm
• 34:57
  in Florida, I have to slow it down for Florida
• 35:00
  people. Because I can be a little too much. But
• 35:03
  when I'm here, I'm myself. Whoa! Happy Hot Topic!
• 35:09
  Martin Lawrence is over the moon to be a grandpa.
• 35:12
  Man, that makes me feel old. Think about it.
• 35:15
  Martin Lawrence is going to be a grandpa. Mm
• 35:18
  -hmm. Doesn't that make you feel a little old?
• 35:23
  Just a little bit? Like that 50 Cent song? Just
• 35:26
  a little bit? For the after Eddie Murphy confirmed
• 35:30
  to E! News at the AFI Life Achievement Awards
• 35:33
  that his son Eric Murphy and Martin's daughter
• 35:36
  Jasmine Lawrence welcomed their first baby together,
• 35:39
  the Bad Boys star shared his overjoyed reaction
• 35:41
  during a recent tour stop. In a video shared
• 35:44
  by fellow comedian Lonnie Love, Martin tells
• 35:47
  the crowd, I'm a grandpa. Me and Eddie Murphy
• 35:50
  share a grandchild. That baby is going to be
• 35:52
  funny as sh**. Either it's going to be funny
• 35:55
  or it's going to be a netball baby that gets
• 35:57
  rolls because of its grandpa. Jasmine and Eric
• 36:01
  announced they were excited. Jasmine's a hot
• 36:02
  piece of ass, isn't she? banning their family
• 36:05
  eight months after tying the knot in a private
• 36:07
  wedding ceremony. Alongside a black and white
• 36:09
  photo of Eric cradling Jasmine's baby. Oh, yeah.
• 36:13
  You know, he plows her heart. They wrote under
• 36:16
  the February 2nd post. Thank you, Jesus, for
• 36:19
  the greatest gift. Oh, it has nothing to do with
• 36:21
  you finishing inside of her. Has nothing to do
• 36:25
  with your semen and her eggs. It's because of
• 36:27
  Jesus. Shut up. So sick of it. Oh, it's because
• 36:32
  of Jesus. Can Jesus help out the bad kids? Not
• 36:37
  the bad kids, but the kids in the bad neighborhood
• 36:39
  in Chicago get out the hood? Why does all the
• 36:42
  rich people that have blessings go, oh, thank
• 36:44
  you. Kind of like how Ricky Gervais says, why
• 36:48
  is God the version of God you were born into?
• 36:51
  So if you're in Georgia, you're a Southern Baptist.
• 36:54
  If you're somewhere else, you're Muslim. It's
• 36:56
  all nonsense. You had sex with your wife and
• 36:59
  she had a kid. That's how it happened. Man, this
• 37:09
  guy was facing 17 years in prison. Now he has
• 37:12
  kids. He had kids before, but he's had another
• 37:15
  kid with Rihanna, man. He's living the life.
• 37:21
  Although he was now loyal to his attorney, he
• 37:24
  did not name the kid after that guy. Philosophically,
• 37:32
  the way she operates is on another level. She's
• 37:35
  the most charming and genuine person on earth.
• 37:37
  Hell yeah! Her energy is unmatched. One of a
• 37:40
  kind. I just adore her. How could you not adore
• 37:43
  Rihanna? She is so beautiful. Rihanna, Nicole
• 37:48
  Scherzinger, Mariah Carey, Hilary Duff, Shakia
• 37:52
  Shakia in the Hipster Online music video are
• 37:56
  the reason I'm heterosexual. When I found out,
• 38:01
  That I like the girls. I rented the first CD
• 38:05
  of Rihanna. The one where she's just laying there.
• 38:08
  The one that had If She's Loving It, You Want
• 38:10
  On It from 2005. And this is pre -masturbation.
• 38:13
  Just looking at the CD going, I think I like
• 38:16
  women. The two have been together since 2020.
• 38:19
  Welcoming their most recent child in September.
• 38:22
  Speaking on Parenthood with Esquire in January.
• 38:24
  ASAP said. I wanted to be a dad before I got
• 38:27
  with my girl. I wanted a little baby girl or
• 38:29
  boy. Whatever God gave and God blessed me. It's
• 38:32
  not God. It's your semen. Having sex with a woman
• 38:36
  or going to a sperm bank has nothing to do with
• 38:39
  God. I mean, I know you say, oh God, that's different.
• 38:44
  It's kind of weird that my mom's in the other
• 38:46
  room taking a nap while I'm talking about semen.
• 38:47
  But I'm just saying, everybody, you'll never
• 38:50
  see me grift. I promise you. I will never become
• 38:55
  Christian where, oh my God, I'm going to start
• 38:57
  grifting and thanking God, but being a scumbag
• 39:01
  and beating people up like A $AP Rocky. Shut
• 39:04
  up. With three, the 37 -year -old told E! News
• 39:06
  in November, being a girl dad made him more vulnerable.
• 39:10
  Ah, it's good. He's realizing he's, you know,
• 39:13
  plowing. He has to do his thing. Oh, my old boss,
• 39:19
  Kipper McGee, messaged me. Hmm. You're asking
• 39:26
  me about Tom Bernard. Oh, well, I don't know.
• 39:33
  Let's see here. Tim Cook, the man who led Apple
• 39:38
  after co -founder. Tim Cook didn't do diddly
• 39:41
  squat. When, see, listen, did Tim Cook make the
• 39:45
  company money? Yes, by making sure that we have
• 39:49
  to buy fucking cords every six months. But Steve
• 39:53
  Jobs was the innovator. Tim Cook was not. He
• 39:57
  was nothing more than a kiss -ass plant. Steve
• 40:00
  Jobs stepped down and says he is leaving the
• 40:03
  top job. Cook has ran the tech giant for nearly
• 40:05
  15 years now, and he launched and expanded new
• 40:08
  services, including Apple Pay, Apple TV, and
• 40:11
  Apple Music. The company's market value under
• 40:14
  Cook's tenure surged to more than $3 trillion.
• 40:17
  Aye, so he made things more expensive for the
• 40:20
  everyday average Joe and Jane. I would rather
• 40:23
  jump off a bridge than give Tim Cook any credit
• 40:26
  because he's a scumbag. You'll never ever hear
• 40:32
  me say a good thing about him. He ruined everything
• 40:35
  and he know he did and he doesn't care. Why doesn't
• 40:40
  he care? Because he's a scumbag. Yeah, it's cool
• 40:45
  to have a successful gay man as the CEO. I'm
• 40:48
  all about gay rights. But when it comes to innovation,
• 40:51
  you're a zero out of ten. The Secret Lives of
• 40:59
  Mormon Wives is resuming production without Taylor
• 41:02
  Frankie Paul or Dakota Mortensen. Oh, yeah. Listen,
• 41:07
  I think all religion's fine. I think everyone
• 41:11
  knows that, but I'm telling you, ladies and gentlemen,
• 41:14
  boys and girls, if there was a way to make Mormons
• 41:18
  look bad, they'd pretty much make themselves
• 41:19
  look bad, but Taylor Frankie Paul doesn't help.
• 41:23
  Filming on season five had been put on pause
• 41:26
  during a domestic incident scandal between star
• 41:28
  Taylor Frankie Paul and Dakota Mortensen in March.
• 41:31
  All right, so she's not going to be on it. Whatever.
• 41:35
  I'm Taylor Frankie Paul. I'm a dirty, rotten
• 41:39
  hag. Shut up. Tina Knowles is revealing where
• 41:47
  Beyonce's sister Solange was conceived. Shortly
• 41:52
  after the Grammy winner shows off her newly buzzed
• 41:55
  head on Instagram, her mom can't help but point
• 41:57
  out the connection between the new hairstyle
• 41:59
  and the place she was conceived. Tina writes
• 42:02
  in an April 21st Instagram post alongside several
• 42:05
  pics of her daughter's buzz cut, It's very appropriate
• 42:11
  since you were conceived on a cruise sailing
• 42:13
  down the Nile in Egypt. That's so weird, man.
• 42:17
  I don't need to know where my parents could see
• 42:18
  me. I know it was an accident! Because my mom
• 42:22
  told my dad that she was pregnant. No, he would
• 42:26
  be pregnant. When she was pregnant, he said,
• 42:28
  oh, just my luck. Which at first kind of hurt
• 42:31
  my feelings, but then I thought about the moments
• 42:34
  that I thought my ex was pregnant. Even though
• 42:38
  I'm the pull -out king. And I get it, homie.
• 42:43
  I get it. It's hard having kids. Whoa! Happy
• 42:48
  Hot Topic! Ray Boyd found love on stage. So I
• 42:53
  guess this is some moment from American Idol.
• 42:55
  I know American Idol gets millions of people,
• 42:58
  but they're definitely not as culturally relevant
• 43:00
  as they used to be. The American Idol alum, who
• 43:04
  was eliminated from the show's 24th season April
• 43:07
  13th. 24 seasons, my God. Hard launched her relationship
• 43:11
  with fellow contestant Brooks Rosser. He's got
• 43:14
  a douchey little haircut. He looks like a cop.
• 43:17
  He looks like a mega kiss ass. during the show's
• 43:21
  Disney night, April 20th. Following Brooks' rendition
• 43:24
  of The Climb by Miley Cyrus, host Ryan Seacrest
• 43:27
  teased a surprise for - All right, Seacrest,
• 43:30
  the guy that takes everyone's jobs. Now listen,
• 43:35
  the guy is one of the, I've heard that there's
• 43:37
  plenty of people I know in LA. I've heard that
• 43:40
  he's very nice and you want to hate him, but
• 43:42
  he's very nice. But I never want to hear a radio
• 43:45
  go, why does no one want to go on the radio?
• 43:48
  And an iHeartRadio has a - in 800 cities, which
• 43:52
  is 800 jobs. Shut your ass. Well, somebody's
• 43:56
  here to surprise you. She's very excited. Former
• 43:58
  finalist Ray, one of the biggest fans of... Alright,
• 44:02
  well, they plow each other. Uh, 8 -5 -6. 49 hopping.
• 44:10
  Here's Jelly Roll News. I have, to some degree,
• 44:18
  lost my way. I don't know what it is, man. Jelly
• 44:22
  Roll just skanks me out there. I know he's probably
• 44:25
  a good dude. He's probably cool. Whatever. But
• 44:31
  there's something about him. Maybe because he
• 44:33
  hangs out with that douche bag. That fat ass
• 44:37
  lizard on his bird crusher. Jelly Roll was giving
• 44:39
  a candid update on his weight loss journey. Before
• 44:42
  we get to the weight loss journey. You know how
• 44:45
  I said in the beginning of the show that I was
• 44:46
  a little drunk and we were just hanging out?
• 44:49
  You hear that little noise? That is my rockstar
• 44:53
  energy and my Tennessee whiskey mixed together.
• 44:57
  Now, if you got any sort of intoxicant next to
• 45:01
  you, let's do it together. Besides fentanyl,
• 45:05
  unless it's on accident. You ready? I'm going
• 45:09
  to chug this because I have to be not sober to
• 45:13
  listen to boring -ass jelly roll news or his
• 45:16
  music. So if you got your marijuana or your alcohol,
• 45:21
  whatever you have, are you ready? Let's go. Oh,
• 45:27
  yeah. Rockstar and whiskey. I don't know. Oh,
• 45:35
  yeah. in a recent youtube video published april
• 45:38
  17th the country singer opens up about how after
• 45:41
  hitting his goal of being on the cover of men's
• 45:44
  health magazine in january he feels like he has
• 45:46
  quote lost his way and that's largely due to
• 45:49
  setbacks that happened over the holidays we hit
• 45:52
  the goal it was right before the holidays so
• 45:54
  i was like you know what man i've been working
• 45:55
  hard for the last three years losing this weight
• 45:58
  said i'm going to uh i'm gonna enjoy the holidays
• 46:00
  and i had a big thanksgiving meal and i had a
• 46:01
  big birthday meal and i made a big christmas
• 46:03
  meal and kind of got off the rails and i I broke
• 46:06
  my collarbone about a week before Christmas,
• 46:07
  a few days before Christmas. Noting that his
• 46:09
  injury also stopped him from exercising, the
• 46:12
  41 -year -old candidly shares that he's been,
• 46:14
  quote, avoiding the scale out of fear that he
• 46:17
  gained weight. But later in the video, Jelly,
• 46:19
  who officially began his fitness journey in 2022
• 46:22
  after weighing over 500 pounds, weighs himself
• 46:25
  at 276 .2 pounds as of April 10th, revealing
• 46:29
  that he's gained 12 pounds. However, the Need
• 46:33
  a Favor singer, who was married to Bunny XO,
• 46:35
  isn't letting his setbacks stop him, as he now
• 46:38
  has a new goal of running the New York City Marathon
• 46:41
  and posing on a magazine with his shirt off.
• 46:44
  We set the new goal of training for the New York
• 46:47
  City Marathon in November. I want to get these
• 46:49
  last 40 or 50 pounds off, and then I eventually
• 46:51
  want to cut my skin, and I eventually want to
• 46:53
  be on the... Oh my God. This is how you know
• 47:01
  I'm getting a little drunk. I just talked for
• 47:04
  like 10 seconds and no one heard it. But I was
• 47:07
  just insulting Jolly Roll, so maybe it's better
• 47:09
  no one heard it. Probably better that way. I'm
• 47:13
  going to listen back tomorrow and be like, I'm
• 47:15
  a jackass. I know so many people in Tampa that
• 47:17
  are kind of slurred talking and be like, oh my
• 47:19
  God. Right, Hoppy's so loud and annoying. And
• 47:22
  I am. But you listen anyway. Like you, Dizzy,
• 47:27
  you little bitch. Daniel Fishel and Lance Bass
• 47:33
  are going to prom again. Oh, my God. Man, Lance
• 47:37
  Bass, even though he's gay, he got to have sex
• 47:39
  with Topanga. Good for you, bro! You and Joey
• 47:45
  Fatone are the cool parts of NSYNC. On Instagram,
• 47:48
  the actress shared these photos from a recreation
• 47:50
  of her. She's a hot piece of ass. Original prom
• 47:53
  with singer Lance Bass. I wonder how Jensen Karp,
• 47:57
  the loser. Remember when Jensen Karp, the failed
• 48:01
  rapper, and one of the worst parts of the Kevin
• 48:04
  and Bean show? He's a failed rapper that was
• 48:06
  known as Hawk Carl. And then he did that thing
• 48:10
  where he pretended there was shrimp, like a dead
• 48:12
  shrimp in his Captain Crunch or whatever, or
• 48:15
  Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Yeah, he had a kid with
• 48:17
  Topanga. That's as big as the accomplishment.
• 48:23
  She wrote, pulled out my actual prom dress for
• 48:29
  $19 .99 and somehow got back into it. Oh, stop
• 48:33
  it, honey. You ain't fat. You know who got really
• 48:36
  chunky? You know what's annoying about women?
• 49:03
  Is they're against curbs. If a man is against
• 49:08
  your curves, he's an incel. Listen to me, baby
• 49:11
  doll. There's nothing better than some curves.
• 49:16
  If you're dating a man that doesn't like curves,
• 49:19
  he might be a creep. I love some meat on the
• 49:22
  bones. You got to appreciate it. You got to do
• 49:27
  your thing. You got to enjoy every minute of
• 49:30
  the meat on the bones. Part of me was like, does
• 49:39
  Leo want to smash? Like, I was like. Oh, yeah.
• 49:41
  Nikki Glaser is revealing a surprising gift from
• 49:44
  Leonardo DiCaprio. She's one of those women because
• 49:48
  she's in an open relationship. She thinks everybody
• 49:51
  wants to plow her. And they probably do. Two
• 49:55
  months after the comedian poked fun at a 1991
• 49:57
  teen beat profile that featured the actor's love
• 50:01
  for pasta while hosting the 2026 Golden Globes,
• 50:04
  Nicki revealed during her April 21st appearance
• 50:07
  on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon his
• 50:10
  response to her quip. I was like, I just don't
• 50:13
  want to make the joke about how he has young
• 50:14
  girlfriends. It's been done so many times. I
• 50:16
  mean, it's been, that joke's been going on longer
• 50:18
  than, you know, his current girlfriend's been
• 50:20
  alive. So Nicki... All right, honey. Decided
• 50:23
  to take a different approach when teasing the
• 50:25
  51 -year -old who's been in a relationship with
• 50:27
  27 -year -old model Vittoria Ceretti since 2023.
• 50:31
  Let's try to find, like, this guy doesn't reveal
• 50:34
  anything about himself. Is Nikki Glaser on Alzheimer's?
• 50:36
  Come on! Why is every girl getting so skinny?
• 50:42
  When you're banging him from behind, it's like
• 50:43
  so bony. Let's find something he's revealed.
• 50:46
  And so me and my writing team found a Teen Beat
• 50:49
  article from 1991 where he revealed, I was like,
• 50:52
  Leo, we don't know anything about you. The only
• 50:54
  thing we know about you is from a Teen Beat article
• 50:56
  in 1991 where you told us your favorite food
• 50:58
  is pasta, pasta, and more pasta. And it really
• 51:01
  was real. And then he sent me three baskets of
• 51:05
  pasta as a thank you. And some lube. Oh, that's
• 51:10
  total flirting. What is she talking about? It's
• 51:14
  not like he sent her a dildo. And although the
• 51:18
  41 -year -old opted not to tease the Oscar winner
• 51:21
  about his pattern of age gap relationships at
• 51:23
  the Golden Globes. Who cares? If it's consensual
• 51:26
  and both parties are happy, I am so sick and
• 51:29
  tired of this woke culture that is hating on
• 51:33
  relationships of age gaps. The man's getting
• 51:37
  pleasure and the younger girls are getting experience.
• 51:40
  As long as they're not 18 and they just walked
• 51:43
  across the high school stage. Who cares? She
• 51:46
  wasn't leaving the jokes behind for good. And
• 51:49
  part of me was, part of me was like, does Leo
• 51:52
  want to smash? Okay, she's just putting it out
• 51:55
  there. You know, she just gives it hard. You
• 52:01
  know, she gives it all she has. You know, when
• 52:08
  a girl's going down, you know, and it's kind
• 52:10
  of like you're kind of talking, you know, she
• 52:11
  would just be very chatty. Katie Holmes likes
• 52:16
  a comment suggesting that she and Joshua Jackson
• 52:19
  should date. I like Joshua Jackson. There's an
• 52:22
  ongoing joke. I'm on one of my favorite radio
• 52:24
  shows, The Kline and Ally Show, with my dude,
• 52:27
  Kevin Kline, where they're not sure if Joshua
• 52:29
  Jackson's famous or not. But that's the perfect
• 52:33
  thing. He's famous enough, but he's also not
• 52:37
  that famous. It's a great life. You can walk
• 52:41
  around. You might get some paparazzi. And you
• 52:44
  get to possibly bang Katie Holmes. Duo who portrayed
• 52:49
  love interests on Dawson's Creek and dated IRL
• 52:52
  in the 90s as the internet buzzing once again
• 52:54
  after Katie likes multiple social media comments
• 52:57
  regarding their relationship status. Under the
• 53:00
  actress's April 16th Instagram post, a promotional
• 53:03
  photo for their film Happy Hours showing Katie
• 53:06
  with her arms wrapped around Joshua, one fan
• 53:09
  writes, wish this was a hard launch. Oh, yeah.
• 53:14
  If you got a vasectomy, you can launch around.
• 53:18
  Another notes that the pair should be a couple.
• 53:20
  Very cute. I saw it right ahead. I mean, we all
• 53:24
  know that Tom Cruise is a loser. Is he cool because
• 53:28
  he does his own stunts in Mission Impossible?
• 53:30
  Yeah, it's good movies. But he's a terrible father
• 53:33
  and a part of the worst cult of them all. He
• 53:37
  makes Mormonism look legit. Both of which receive
• 53:40
  a heart from Katie. All right, there you go.
• 53:42
  They're hanging out, doing their thing. Good
• 53:45
  for them. I'm happy for them. Not at all. What's
• 53:49
  going on here? Kaitlyn Bristow is setting the
• 53:52
  record straight. Amid online speculation that
• 53:54
  the Bachelorette star and Jesse Draper are in
• 53:57
  a public feud, Kaitlyn posted a video to her
• 53:59
  Instagram April 21st to clear the air. She looks
• 54:03
  hot, but she has like those crazy eyes. She'd
• 54:06
  be a psychopath. I saw how much attention the
• 54:10
  Alex vs. Alex was getting, so I was like, who
• 54:11
  can I have beef with? Pick Jesse. you jesse i'm
• 54:14
  joking i can't believe this is um annoying voice
• 54:17
  thing right now this all started when caitlin
• 54:19
  posted a photo of herself with the caption imagine
• 54:22
  hating me and i'm just happy in an online you're
• 54:25
  not happy if you're having to make the post about
• 54:28
  how happy you are honey you ain't that happy
• 54:31
  a user decided to call her out i get called out
• 54:35
  every day by loser rednecks that are probably
• 54:38
  deadbeat dads and absolute scumbags and i've
• 54:42
  been talked crap about on morning radio shows
• 54:45
  that claim to be so happy you know what happens
• 54:49
  even though i'm addressing it right now but what
• 54:50
  i'm saying is i ignore it but i'm happy with
• 54:53
  my life if you're addressing the haters it bothers
• 54:57
  you A girl came on and said, people who are happy
• 55:00
  don't have to tell us they're happy. And I was
• 55:02
  like, oh. Exactly. Exactly. It's not that deep.
• 55:05
  Jessie commented under it and said, same girl
• 55:08
  or something like that. And I was like, I see
• 55:09
  you. And after her post was accidentally. God.
• 55:13
  Growing up, I used to be so jealous of celebrities.
• 55:16
  I wanted to be them. Now I think they're losers.
• 55:21
  They're idiots. You know nothing. You're stupid.
• 55:27
  You're the worst. Mm -hmm. ...deleted, the 40
• 55:32
  -year -old reposted the picture and clapped back
• 55:34
  at the troll in her... Oh, yeah! A totally confident
• 55:38
  person has to clap back! Mm -hmm. ...new caption,
• 55:43
  but somehow Jesse got caught in the crossfire.
• 55:47
  So I don't know how this happened, but my photo
• 55:49
  got deleted, so I reposted it... ...and wrote
• 55:52
  this underneath. I already posted this and somehow
• 55:53
  it got deleted. What an annoying hag. You're
• 55:55
  using that fast speeding voice. Shut up. All
• 55:59
  right. You live your miserable life of pretending
• 56:04
  you don't care about the haters. Yeah, you're
• 56:06
  making an annoying video about it. Shut up. Go
• 56:11
  away. Artem Chikvensev is reflecting on the week
• 56:16
  that he says, quote, completely changed his life.
• 56:19
  Nearly two years after the professional dancer
• 56:21
  was arrested for domestic violence stemming from
• 56:24
  an incident with ex -wife Nikki Garcia. Listen,
• 56:27
  and I'm saying this about Taylor, Frankie, Paul,
• 56:30
  sociopathic fine ass. If you are having to beat
• 56:34
  people up as a resolution for a fight, not only
• 56:39
  are you a loser, but you're an idiot. Artem now
• 56:44
  describes the entire ordeal as a, quote, bad
• 56:46
  dream. As he explains on the April 20th episode
• 56:49
  of the Penthouse with PETA podcast. I had to
• 56:52
  completely switch off me. There was no way of
• 56:56
  processing everything. It just didn't exist.
• 56:59
  Yeah, survival mode. Shut up! You're the worst!
• 57:06
  You are definitely a douchebag! Two network icons,
• 57:16
  Sandra Lee and her fiancé, actor Ben Youssef,
• 57:18
  are no more, calling off their wedding after
• 57:20
  five years of dating. A rep for Sandra confirming
• 57:23
  to TMZ April 22nd that the former couple have,
• 57:26
  in fact, called off their nuptials, nearly a
• 57:29
  week after Sandra was spotted out and about in
• 57:31
  New York without her engagement ring. However,
• 57:33
  at the time, the semi -homemade cooking star
• 57:35
  shook off. All right, so they called off their
• 57:37
  engagement. You know the right happy row about
• 57:40
  engagement. If you get engaged, but you don't
• 57:43
  have a date set, that's not real. That's fake.
• 57:52
  What's going on here? Big news out of the UK.
• 57:55
  Children 17 years old or younger are now facing
• 57:58
  a lifetime ban on buying cigarettes. This is
• 58:02
  so stupid. I don't know what's stupider. banning
• 58:07
  cigarettes or the fact that they called cigarettes
• 58:10
  the F word for gay people. It wasn't based off
• 58:12
  of it. I'm not going to say the word because
• 58:13
  I don't want to get cancelled. But you sound
• 58:17
  ignorant. But you also don't go to dentists so
• 58:20
  I'm not taking you seriously as a country. This
• 58:23
  landmark legislation has been approved by parliament.
• 58:25
  It would prohibit anyone born in 2009 or later
• 58:29
  from ever buying tobacco products including cigarettes
• 58:33
  and vapes. Proposals expected to go into law
• 58:37
  after a formal approval by King Charles. Oh,
• 58:41
  King Charles! The dude that covered up pedophilia
• 58:46
  with his loser brother. He's in charge. Funk
• 58:49
  dead. Rule will apply in England, Scotland, Wales,
• 58:53
  and Northern Ireland. Here's a fair part of the
• 58:56
  Today Show videos. Hey, thanks for watching.
• 58:59
  No problem, Al Roker. Forget you can catch the
• 59:02
  Today Show every morning. I'm totally up watching.
• 59:05
  I'm not hungover off of the vodka or whatever.
• 59:07
  On NBC. Oh, whatever, dude. You're the original.
• 59:11
  It's epic. You're Al Roker. Pete Davidson made
• 59:16
  a public appearance where he had no tattoos.
• 59:22
  Good for you, dude. I remember when he went out
• 59:26
  the first weekend after claiming he had no tattoos.
• 59:30
  And now it's actually gone. I'm like, it's not
• 59:32
  going to happen overnight. Starting today, the
• 59:38
  U .S. is expected to reclassify marijuana as
• 59:42
  a less restricted drug. Good. Get off stone right
• 59:47
  now. Allegedly. What else do we have going on
• 59:51
  in the world? This crazy broad who fired shots
• 59:55
  at Rihanna's home lost custody of her kid. Good.
• 59:58
  She'll lose her. I know she's mentally ill, but
• 1:00:02
  so am I. And I don't do that. Floyd Mayweather's
• 1:00:06
  daughter said that Justin Bieber should have
• 1:00:09
  been her baby daddy. You know he'll plow her
• 1:00:13
  this weekend. And what do we got here? Trick
• 1:00:17
  Daddy says he's tired of older women while saying
• 1:00:20
  why he dates women under 40. Oh, yeah. Let's
• 1:00:24
  go, Trick Daddy. Get what I did there. Over 36.
• 1:00:27
  Yeah, I'm tired of them bitches. I'm tired of
• 1:00:30
  them. I'm tired of them bitches to the point
• 1:00:32
  where. Yeah, because older women read through
• 1:00:34
  your phoniness, but young women fall for your
• 1:00:37
  daddy energy. You know what I mean? It's like
• 1:00:43
  the older you get, the more serious you want
• 1:00:44
  to get out of life. And your seriousness don't
• 1:00:46
  involve me. Don't involve me. I'm tired of women
• 1:00:48
  bragging about their credit score and their LLCs
• 1:00:51
  and all this shit. I own my own business. You
• 1:00:56
  own your own business, but your business ain't
• 1:00:58
  making no money. We're getting older. For a woman
• 1:01:03
  my age, we're getting older. Got it. Let's start
• 1:01:05
  respecting and loving each other on each other.
• 1:01:07
  Stop making it all about you. All these fucking
• 1:01:09
  rules. Lower your fucking standard. Yeah. That
• 1:01:12
  is him saying that older milfs, don't take them
• 1:01:16
  seriously. Because when he's talking about other
• 1:01:18
  people's businesses, he's talking about his career.
• 1:01:22
  I want me a little nice young tender something
• 1:01:25
  that's going to appreciate me. It's going to
• 1:01:27
  tell me I... Because she's using you. And you're
• 1:01:30
  using her. And that's totally fine. Mm -hmm.
• 1:01:34
  Smell good. It's going to tell me they like my
• 1:01:36
  shoes sometimes. It's not all about you. And
• 1:01:38
  I think older women just got it fucked up to
• 1:01:40
  the point where you're doing all this little
• 1:01:44
  girl shit, but you still acting like an old ass
• 1:01:46
  witch. Whatever, dude. Europe. Russell Brand
• 1:01:51
  admits to sleeping with a 16 -year -old when
• 1:01:53
  he was 30. Oh yeah! This is the British King
• 1:01:57
  Omega! This guy's religious now! Religion and
• 1:02:01
  pedophilia mixing? No way! And in the United
• 1:02:05
  Kingdom where I'm from, the age of consent is
• 1:02:08
  16, and I did sleep with... a 16 year old when
• 1:02:12
  I was 30. But when I was 30, I was a very different
• 1:02:15
  person. You're the same personality, scumbag.
• 1:02:18
  You're just facing rape charges. So you're acting
• 1:02:20
  like you're not. Shut up. I was a lot younger
• 1:02:25
  and I was an immature 30 year old. Consensual
• 1:02:28
  sex. You're an immature fifth -year -old. Show
• 1:02:30
  your ass. Actually, with a variety of people,
• 1:02:33
  when there is a strong power differential, because
• 1:02:36
  there is when you're a famous. Probably some
• 1:02:38
  guys. Of course that hag known as Megyn Kelly
• 1:02:40
  would interview her, interview him, because she's
• 1:02:43
  a loser. This man that has the ability to attract
• 1:02:46
  women that I had at that time, I think, involves
• 1:02:51
  exploiting. I don't want to hear from him. I
• 1:02:54
  don't want to hear from him. He's just the worst.
• 1:02:57
  No wonder Katy Perry left you. You're a creep.
• 1:03:01
  You were her bad boy era. That's all you are.
• 1:03:06
  You were not bad as a radio host. But besides
• 1:03:10
  that, you're nothing. Oh, Joe Exotic is in solitary
• 1:03:17
  confinement. I'm sure he's not freaking out.
• 1:03:23
  That's sarcasm. He's freaking out. Tyler May,
• 1:03:28
  who's on OnlyFans, says Sidney Sweeney's scenes
• 1:03:31
  on Euphoria is good for OnlyFans. Vernon Davis's
• 1:03:37
  battery case was dismissed and he's grateful.
• 1:03:39
  Of course he is. And then Andy Cohen calls Joe
• 1:03:47
  Rogan an idiot for Spencer Pratt endorsement.
• 1:03:52
  But Andy Cohen. This is what Joe Rogan wants.
• 1:03:57
  He wants your attention because he's a dumb jock
• 1:04:01
  and he gets a high from people talking about
• 1:04:04
  him like we are right now. Like if Andy Cohen
• 1:04:08
  never addressed him. As much as I like Andy Cohen,
• 1:04:12
  he's one of those guys that thinks clapping back
• 1:04:15
  because he's around all the housewives. He thinks
• 1:04:19
  that's the way to do it. Bro, I'm starting to
• 1:04:22
  lose my voice. You literally, are just giving
• 1:04:26
  Joe Rogan a platform. Here is Andy Cohen. Kristen,
• 1:04:34
  what was your reaction to the news about Spencer
• 1:04:38
  Pratt running for mayor of L .A.? And what did
• 1:04:41
  you think of Brody Jenner endorsing him? If anyone
• 1:04:45
  is qualified to be mayor of L .A. Absolutely.
• 1:04:49
  Yeah, you know, Spencer Pratt probably wouldn't
• 1:04:51
  be that bad of a politician. I was shocked, obviously.
• 1:04:55
  Crystal Cavallari is such a hot piece of ass.
• 1:04:57
  First, like everybody else, but if you actually
• 1:05:00
  listen to him, he knows his stuff. He's very
• 1:05:03
  well spoken. Of course, Brody is going to endorse
• 1:05:06
  him. That's his best friend. And I honestly could
• 1:05:08
  see him winning. People in California really
• 1:05:09
  are excited about him. By the way. Kind of seems
• 1:05:13
  like he's going to win. I think so. Yeah, Karen
• 1:05:16
  Bass is a hag. I think so. I know. You know,
• 1:05:21
  Karen Bass, she does not have a lot of people
• 1:05:24
  going for her. She ruined everything during those
• 1:05:27
  wildfires. She's a moron. I see him winning.
• 1:05:30
  He's got a lot of momentum. I think so. Oh, Andy
• 1:05:33
  Cohen. If I was gay, I'd suck him off. Yeah.
• 1:05:36
  Rogan just endorsed him. Oh, Rogan. The great
• 1:05:39
  mind. I know. Of the universe. i love andy cohen
• 1:05:44
  rogan idiot i agree i always judge people that
• 1:05:52
  take joe rogan seriously for medical advice you're
• 1:05:56
  stupid what's going on here ready whenever you
• 1:06:03
  are michael michael jackson's life story is about
• 1:06:05
  to hit the big screen but i like how they're
• 1:06:08
  covering up the pedophilia we all know he's a
• 1:06:11
  creep and he was actually found innocent so the
• 1:06:14
  fact that it was left onto the documentary is
• 1:06:17
  a joke and it's getting horrid reviews so good
• 1:06:20
  for it a major chapter is missing i believe music
• 1:06:25
  You could change the world. While the film focuses
• 1:06:28
  on the King of Pop's career highs, E .T.'s learned
• 1:06:31
  it ends in the 80s and leaves out some controversy,
• 1:06:34
  including the sexual abuse allegations that first
• 1:06:37
  surfaced in 1993 and followed him into... All
• 1:06:41
  right, well, you heard the best -of segment earlier
• 1:06:42
  where I talked about it. They're playing his
• 1:06:44
  music in the background, and I'm not authorized
• 1:06:46
  to do that. Today on TMZ... I am obsessed...
• 1:06:55
  with this story about at least 10 and maybe 11
• 1:07:00
  scientists going missing or dying. There are
• 1:07:04
  some reasonable explanations. First of all, the
• 1:07:06
  Air Force Major General, he retired almost 13
• 1:07:09
  years ago. It seems unlikely that he was taken
• 1:07:12
  to extract very dated secrets. That's exactly
• 1:07:14
  what you would say if you're trying to cover
• 1:07:16
  it up. Exactly! Drake has a new album coming
• 1:07:20
  out called Ice. He's a pedophile! Iceman, and
• 1:07:24
  he has an amazing way that he's promoting it.
• 1:07:26
  He put all these ice blocks, and the release
• 1:07:29
  date is hidden in this ice. So his fans are going
• 1:07:32
  crazy. My icebox, where my heart used to be.
• 1:07:36
  Oh, Marianne. Pickaxes. So wait a minute. Have
• 1:07:39
  we Etch -a -Sketched Kendrick versus Drake? It's
• 1:07:42
  like it never happened. We'll find out. It'd
• 1:07:44
  be great if they mailed that thing down. Inside
• 1:07:45
  it's Kendrick. Sydney Sweeney reportedly got
• 1:07:51
  sliced from the Devil Wears Prada 2. Why wouldn't
• 1:07:54
  they use her? That movie's going to be just fine
• 1:07:56
  without her. I'm so excited. It's going to be
• 1:07:58
  so good. It's massive, huh? Massive. God, I would
• 1:08:02
  love to watch Texas Sydney Sweeney. She looks
• 1:08:06
  like she'd bring Narrakis. Mm -hmm. Is this?
• 1:08:10
  I must be missing. I understand why you don't
• 1:08:13
  understand that watching a movie about an evil
• 1:08:15
  boss would be a good time. Yeah, that ain't a
• 1:08:21
  joke. TMZ DC got Congressman Morgan McGarvey,
• 1:08:27
  and we had a really good idea for him. The congressional
• 1:08:29
  baseball game is where Democrats and Republicans
• 1:08:32
  play each other in the baseball field. I feel
• 1:08:34
  like if you're the MVP, you should be able to
• 1:08:36
  bring whatever bill you want. Imagine how it
• 1:08:39
  would change candidate recruitment. All right,
• 1:08:44
  there they are, TMZ. They're wild. David, D4VD,
• 1:08:49
  moved to same LA jail as Nick Rainer. Maybe they
• 1:08:52
  can be lovers. Mr. Beast, former staffer, sues
• 1:08:55
  for wrongful termination. The company declines
• 1:08:58
  the rules or says that that was false. Can you
• 1:09:01
  imagine if Mr. Beast was like, yeah, I got rid
• 1:09:04
  of her. She's the worst. Paul Pierce knocked
• 1:09:07
  up a side chick and has a two -month -old baby
• 1:09:11
  and wants joint custody. Good for him. Taylor
• 1:09:14
  Frankie Paul never booked Dancing with the Stars.
• 1:09:17
  Oh, good for her. And Hulk Hogan took a lot of
• 1:09:20
  fentanyl to manage his pain. That is the most
• 1:09:23
  Tampa Bay thing I've ever heard. Is that. What's
• 1:09:29
  going on with this moron? I like to cook for
• 1:09:33
  the family. Dave Grohl opens up about his home
• 1:09:36
  life with his wife and kids. Oh, the wife he
• 1:09:39
  cheated on. He reminds me of morning radio hosts
• 1:09:43
  that cheat on their wife, but they try to control
• 1:09:46
  the narrative. Like, oh, it was an accident when
• 1:09:49
  I completely had sex with a woman and completed
• 1:09:51
  the task. Two years after fathering a child outside
• 1:09:55
  his marriage. And I'm sure he's totally not a
• 1:09:58
  deadbeat dad to her. The Foo Fighters frontman
• 1:10:02
  reveals how he reconnects with his loved ones,
• 1:10:04
  including wife Jordan and their three kids. Oh,
• 1:10:07
  yeah. I'll be honest. I posted a rant about Dave
• 1:10:11
  Grohl and some woman that claimed she had sex
• 1:10:13
  with him. Now, I'm not going to say she did,
• 1:10:15
  but she knew a lot about Jordan. And supposedly
• 1:10:19
  Jordan, allegedly in another world, was originally
• 1:10:23
  a side chick. So he loves his side chicks. It's
• 1:10:28
  20 -year -old Violet May, 17 -year -old Harper
• 1:10:31
  Willow, and 11 -year -old Ophelia Saint after
• 1:10:33
  being out on the road. Dave tells the Dish podcast
• 1:10:36
  during its April 22nd episode. Well, the first
• 1:10:39
  thing I do when I come home from being on tour
• 1:10:42
  is bang another woman and knock them up. I like
• 1:10:46
  to cook for the family. Now he's being so likable.
• 1:10:49
  And these kiss -ass interviewers that are happy
• 1:10:52
  to have him. Let the celebrities say what they
• 1:10:54
  want to say. If I was there, I'd be like, when
• 1:10:57
  you come home from a tour, do you bang your sidekick?
• 1:11:00
  So, I love to get straight into the kitchen.
• 1:11:03
  Oh, yeah. Whether it's making a roast. And you
• 1:11:04
  like getting in other women, dude. And having
• 1:11:07
  kids. Just over the weekend. Or it's a pasta.
• 1:11:11
  You see how he's trying to be the family man
• 1:11:14
  now? He used to almost never talk about his family,
• 1:11:17
  but now he's a family man. I'm home, and I bring
• 1:11:23
  the comfort to the kids. And you comfort your
• 1:11:25
  side chicks you cheat on your wife with, and
• 1:11:28
  you're not even responsible enough to get a vasectomy.
• 1:11:31
  However, Grohl's family life hasn't been without
• 1:11:33
  its ups and downs. A little bit more of downs
• 1:11:36
  when you're going down to help him get ready.
• 1:11:38
  with him sharing in September 2024 that he welcomed
• 1:11:41
  a fourth daughter outside of his marriage. Can
• 1:11:43
  you imagine being a daughter and you're the product
• 1:11:45
  of a side chick? He wrote on Instagram at the
• 1:11:48
  time, I plan to be a loving and supportive parent
• 1:11:51
  to her. Oh, you're going to be so great. You're
• 1:11:53
  going to teach her morals. I love my wife and
• 1:11:56
  children, and I'm doing everything I can to regain
• 1:11:58
  their trust and earn their forgiveness. He reminds
• 1:12:01
  me of Tampa Morning Radio. He's in a rock band,
• 1:12:05
  thinks he's better than people, and cheats on
• 1:12:07
  his wife. Oh, wait. Did I say that out loud?
• 1:12:09
  Tampa Morning Radio is so loyal. They never do
• 1:12:13
  that. They're great people. Mm -hmm. Now to FBI
• 1:12:18
  Director Kash Patel. Drunk and loser. Speaking
• 1:12:22
  about his $250 million defamation suit against
• 1:12:25
  the Atlantic Magazine. If you're having to seal
• 1:12:28
  a magazine about you being a drunk, even though
• 1:12:31
  we saw you chugging beer with the hockey team,
• 1:12:33
  takes on taxpayers' money like a loser. We know
• 1:12:37
  you're a drunk. Denying charges. Of course he's
• 1:12:40
  going to deny it. What's he going to say? I'm
• 1:12:42
  a drunken idiot. For behavior, behavior in an
• 1:12:45
  article it published about him. Chief. He just
• 1:12:47
  looks like a drunk. You look at him. Investigative
• 1:12:50
  correspondent Aaron Katurski has that story for
• 1:12:52
  us. Oh, I love when Aaron reports. Good morning,
• 1:12:56
  Aaron. Good morning, Robin. The FBI director
• 1:12:57
  defended his job performance and denounced claims
• 1:13:00
  about his drinking, saying. Well, let's be honest.
• 1:13:03
  He has been awful. He's never been drunk at work.
• 1:13:06
  Shut up. You weren't technically at work with
• 1:13:10
  the Olympic team, you scumbag. This morning,
• 1:13:14
  FBI Director Kash Patel is taking... Loser. Making
• 1:13:17
  aim at the Atlantic, which public douchebag,
• 1:13:20
  which claims of unexplained absences, impulsive
• 1:13:23
  decision -making and excessive drinking. I've
• 1:13:25
  never been intoxicated on the job. And that of
• 1:13:28
  course you have, and you probably bang women.
• 1:13:30
  This is why we filed a $250 million defamation
• 1:13:33
  lawsuit. And why are your eyes always bulging
• 1:13:35
  out of your head? Cause you're drunk. You scumbag.
• 1:13:40
  Anyone of you that wants to participate, a $250
• 1:13:43
  million defamation lawsuit, and anyone of you
• 1:13:46
  that wants to participate, bring it on. I'll
• 1:13:48
  see you in court. I'll see you in court. So you're
• 1:13:51
  going to have to go through a deposition, or
• 1:13:52
  you're going to have to go under oath in court.
• 1:13:55
  Patel is now suing for defamation and lashing
• 1:13:57
  out at reporters. I can say, drunken douchebag.
• 1:14:02
  Unequivocally, that I never listen to the fake
• 1:14:04
  news mafia. Oh, the mafia. You're the mafia.
• 1:14:08
  You work for the mafia, you douchebag. And as
• 1:14:11
  when they get louder, it just means I'm doing
• 1:14:13
  my job. Oh, yeah, you're totally killing it.
• 1:14:20
  Anacortical said members of his security detail
• 1:14:22
  had difficulty waking Patel because he was seemingly
• 1:14:25
  intoxicated. He just looks like that dude that
• 1:14:29
  was a loser on the playground. Everyone beat
• 1:14:32
  up and he got a power trip. Also said a request
• 1:14:35
  for breaching equipment normally used by SWAT
• 1:14:38
  and hostage rescue teams to quickly gain entry
• 1:14:40
  into buildings was made last year because Patel
• 1:14:43
  had been unreachable behind locked doors. Patel's
• 1:14:48
  boss, Acting Attorney General Todd Blanche. Another
• 1:14:51
  kiss -ass loser. Said he had not read the article
• 1:14:54
  but disputed its contents. Oh, so how are you
• 1:14:57
  going to dispute it if you haven't read it? You're
• 1:14:59
  all a bunch of liars. Shut up. You mega kiss
• 1:15:04
  asses. It's time for Kardashian News. Hoppy speaks
• 1:15:22
  what's on his mind, yeah. Nepotism's thrown,
• 1:15:25
  they sittin' in the plush. Built an empire off
• 1:15:28
  nothin' but the hush. Reality's a script, ain't
• 1:15:30
  no realness in the cut. Talents on vacation,
• 1:15:33
  they just takin' what's corrupt. Hoppy's on the
• 1:15:35
  mic, call it verbal demolition. Exposin' fake
• 1:15:37
  lives, media's worse addiction. Idiocracy crowned,
• 1:15:41
  it's the brain on snooze. Clickbait queens, welcome
• 1:15:43
  to Kardashian News. Where the truth gets aired.
• 1:15:47
  Hoppy breakin' down the hype, y 'all beware.
• 1:15:49
  Fake smells, fake lies. lives fake drama they
• 1:15:52
  choose no talent required it's kardashian news
• 1:15:55
  where the truth gets aired hoppy breaking down
• 1:15:59
  the hype y 'all beware fake smells fake lives
• 1:16:01
  fake lives fake drama they choose no talent required
• 1:16:04
  it's kardashian news diamond studded lies selling
• 1:16:07
  dreams to the broke gold -plated nothing society
• 1:16:10
  inside joke hoppy ain't scared man he roasting
• 1:16:13
  them raw nepo babies flexing like they rewrote
• 1:16:16
  the law surgical Precision, every word's a slice
• 1:16:19
  Hypocrisy exposed under studio lights Instagram
• 1:16:23
  filters, they mask the truth Hoppy's here to
• 1:16:26
  school them, welcome to the booth Yeah, Hoppy's
• 1:16:28
  got no leash, no chain Speaking what he feels,
• 1:16:31
  never playing the game No Kardashian can spin
• 1:16:34
  his name on this night Untamed, where the truth
• 1:16:40
  gets aired Hoppy breaking down the hype, y 'all
• 1:16:42
  beware Fake love, fake love Fake lies, fake drama,
• 1:16:45
  they choose. No talent required. It's Kardashian
• 1:16:48
  News. Kardashian News. Yo, what's going on with
• 1:17:03
  the Kardashians? Oh, yeah. Khloe. Or not Khloe.
• 1:17:09
  I get them all mixed up. They're all the same.
• 1:17:11
  They're all a walking case of HPV. No. Kylie
• 1:17:14
  is getting sued. Is being sued by a former housekeeper
• 1:17:19
  who alleges the beauty moguls team harassed and
• 1:17:22
  discriminated against her. Of course they did.
• 1:17:26
  Race and religion. In documents obtained by E!
• 1:17:28
  News, Kylie's former housekeeper Angelica Vasquez
• 1:17:31
  filing a lawsuit April 17th in Los Angeles. What
• 1:17:34
  a name. Rear Court against the Kylie Cosmetics
• 1:17:37
  founder, as well as two limited liability companies
• 1:17:40
  and 25 individuals who have yet to be identified,
• 1:17:43
  alleging she was subjected to severe and pervasive
• 1:17:45
  harassment while working for Kylie in her Hidden
• 1:17:48
  Hills residence from September. September 2024
• 1:17:53
  to August 2025. Angelica alleges in the court
• 1:17:57
  docs that as a Salvadoran woman and practicing
• 1:18:00
  Catholic, she was routinely assigned the most
• 1:18:02
  difficult and undesirable tasks. Excluded from
• 1:18:05
  the housekeeping team, publicly belittled and
• 1:18:07
  humiliated in front of coworkers due to her race,
• 1:18:10
  national origin, and religion. The Kardashians
• 1:18:12
  being racist? No way! And subjected to intimidation
• 1:18:16
  and demeaning treatment. They're scumbags! A
• 1:18:20
  family based off of a sex tape? No way! Says
• 1:18:23
  this alleged treatment created a toxic and abusive
• 1:18:26
  work environment. And that no remedial action
• 1:18:30
  was taken by any supervisors who witnessed this.
• 1:18:33
  There's no supervisors, it's Kylie. When she
• 1:18:36
  did raise concerns, the docs say her complaints
• 1:18:38
  were dismissed, mocked, or ignored, with Angelica
• 1:18:41
  allegedly experiencing increased workload, reduction
• 1:18:44
  of scheduled hours, false accusations, and disciplinary
• 1:18:51
  warnings. All right, so they're not good people.
• 1:18:55
  Who would have thought? What a freaking surprise.
• 1:19:00
  The Kardashians not being good people? No way.
• 1:19:04
  I'm so thrown back. I thought they were angels.
• 1:19:09
  What's going on with Kylie Jenner, that hot piece
• 1:19:12
  of ass? I mean, Kendall, they're all hot, but.
• 1:19:16
  Could there be a new romance brewing? Fans are
• 1:19:19
  convinced that they're seeing sparks between
• 1:19:21
  Kendall Jenner and Jacob Elordi. Most recently,
• 1:19:24
  there were rumblings on social media from Coachella
• 1:19:26
  goers who say they saw the pair getting especially
• 1:19:29
  cozy during the music festival. Gossip blog Dumois
• 1:19:32
  even claimed multiple sources reported the pair
• 1:19:35
  locking lips at Justin Bieber's after party.
• 1:19:38
  I don't know what this Deux Moi blog is. I mean,
• 1:19:40
  it's D -E -U -X Moi, M -O -I. I know what it
• 1:19:43
  is. But dang it, the inside scoop. I think it's
• 1:19:46
  some nepo, baby. I would not be surprised if
• 1:19:50
  it was Joseph Carbo of 93 .3 FLZ, who's gotten
• 1:19:56
  everything from his daddy. Meantime, there have
• 1:20:00
  also been reports suggesting that the relationship
• 1:20:02
  between the model and the Euphoria star had turned
• 1:20:04
  romantic months ago. Plus, the Daily Mail has
• 1:20:07
  pictures of the pair chatting together at the
• 1:20:09
  Vanity Fair Oscars. Okay, so they've been inside
• 1:20:11
  each other both, you know, in the conventional
• 1:20:14
  way and the unconventional way. Any other Kardashian
• 1:20:19
  news? Then there's this. Kim Kardashian and Lewis
• 1:20:24
  Hamilton's relationship is running at max speed.
• 1:20:28
  Oh, yeah. Get what they did there. He's a racer
• 1:20:31
  at max speed. Oh, yeah. The new couple hitting
• 1:20:34
  the beach in Malibu, California, April 20th,
• 1:20:37
  packing on the PDA, making out as they swam in
• 1:20:40
  the Pacific Ocean. They were wet all day. I wonder
• 1:20:46
  if they'll have kids. It's time. for side chick
• 1:20:51
  news i send my transcript every day of this show
• 1:20:54
  to chad gvt and they love transcript news or
• 1:20:58
  uh not transcript news you know i'm drunk side
• 1:21:01
  chick news side chick news We talking Massey
• 1:21:19
  today. But you tend to watch, he buys, it's that
• 1:21:53
  side chick news Side chick news Ryan Hoppy gon'
• 1:21:57
  choose Every fraud, every fling, every late night
• 1:22:00
  move We exposed, we amused Yeah, we say it like
• 1:22:04
  it is on an afternoon cruise Side chick news
• 1:22:07
  Whole world tuned to the truth You can't hide
• 1:22:09
  from your man, can't hide from this boo Side
• 1:22:12
  chick news Phone light flashing, who you trying
• 1:22:17
  to text? Got a ring on your hand, still shaking
• 1:22:28
  Missed one post, off life, next post There you
• 1:23:56
  go. Here is Mike Vrabel discussing Diana Taurasi.
• 1:24:01
  Oh, I should probably have the website unmuted.
• 1:24:04
  I do that every day. You could do a bingo card.
• 1:24:06
  One line would be, is Ryan Hoppy going to say,
• 1:24:08
  mm -hmm? One could be, does Ryan Hoppy throw
• 1:24:12
  a shot at his extra Mike Kelta? And one could
• 1:24:14
  be free space. One says, does he talk about the
• 1:24:17
  past? And one says, does he have TMZ muted? Let
• 1:24:23
  me first begin by saying thank you. Thank you
• 1:24:25
  for your patience. Oh, we're so patient. Mike,
• 1:24:30
  we don't give a crap. You cheated on your wife.
• 1:24:32
  That you've shown in a personal and private matter.
• 1:24:36
  Oh, yeah, it wasn't very private. We caught you
• 1:24:38
  cheating on your wife with a promiscuous reporter,
• 1:24:41
  bro. We ain't stupid. You weren't playing card
• 1:24:44
  games. For me and obviously everybody involved,
• 1:24:48
  I know that... Yeah, your wife that you cheated
• 1:24:51
  on. That's not easy for you. And I respect that,
• 1:24:55
  and I appreciate your efforts in doing that.
• 1:24:57
  What efforts? You put in no effort. You have
• 1:25:00
  a failed marriage. I think so. I understand I
• 1:25:04
  could have addressed you guys sooner. Yeah, but
• 1:25:07
  you're a coward. You claim to be a man to the
• 1:25:09
  people. You claim to be relatable to Patriots
• 1:25:13
  fandom. But you're a loser. In the Super Bowl
• 1:25:17
  and in life. But it was important to me. To have
• 1:25:20
  a conversation with the players, which I did
• 1:25:22
  yesterday. Oh, yeah. You guys know how you cheat
• 1:25:25
  on your wife? I did, too. Very candidly, as we
• 1:25:29
  began our offseason program. Oh, yeah. Next year,
• 1:25:34
  the Chiefs are going to have Eric Biennemi back.
• 1:25:37
  You ain't going anywhere. Which everyone is excited
• 1:25:39
  to be a part of. You're a one -year wonder, and
• 1:25:43
  you should have won. Stacey had mentioned the
• 1:25:46
  players' availability. And it was never my intention
• 1:25:50
  to have them speak to you or address you before
• 1:25:53
  I did. Oh, yeah. You should have said it's a
• 1:25:55
  week ago. But you hid and had your GM talk for
• 1:25:59
  you. Because not only are you a coward as a father
• 1:26:02
  and as a man and as a husband, you're a coward
• 1:26:05
  as a coach. And so I asked him to come today
• 1:26:09
  and to talk with you. Yeah. You don't know what
• 1:26:14
  to say because you're lying. And the whole Patriots
• 1:26:17
  media kisses your ass. I also don't want to take
• 1:26:19
  away from our, you know, the draft, the weekend
• 1:26:23
  of the draft. Oh, the important things. You know,
• 1:26:27
  this is an important time for us. Oh, is it?
• 1:26:29
  And our organization and the excitement and the
• 1:26:32
  joy that those players are going to have that.
• 1:26:34
  That we bring onto our football team. You are
• 1:26:37
  so boring. No wonder you lost to the Seahawks.
• 1:26:41
  They're starting an amazing journey. Shut up.
• 1:26:44
  One that should be celebrated. You applaud Diana
• 1:26:48
  Rossini and we know it. As we welcome them onto
• 1:26:51
  our team. You're no worse, dude. You're hiding.
• 1:26:58
  You think you're above us. You think you're better
• 1:27:01
  than us, but you're another mortal human being
• 1:27:04
  with a failed marriage. And you think you're
• 1:27:07
  so wise. Oh, the wise of Mike Vrabel. Shut up.
• 1:27:14
  With that being said. Yeah. You know, you got
• 1:27:19
  nothing to say. You're lying. Whenever someone
• 1:27:21
  has to take 20 seconds to talk, they're lying.
• 1:27:24
  I've had some difficult conversations with. Oh,
• 1:27:27
  honey, I was cheering on you. The people that
• 1:27:29
  I care about with my family. You don't care about
• 1:27:31
  them. If you cared about them, you wouldn't applaud
• 1:27:32
  Diana Rossini. Family, the organization, the
• 1:27:36
  coaches, the players. Those have been positive
• 1:27:40
  and productive. Shut up. We believe in order
• 1:27:44
  to be successful on and off the field, you have
• 1:27:46
  to make good decisions. Yeah, you loved when
• 1:27:49
  you were having sex with her, but you just got
• 1:27:51
  caught. That includes me. Shut up. Starts with
• 1:27:54
  me. Whoever won our actions to negatively affect
• 1:27:59
  the team. It didn't affect the team. It infected
• 1:28:02
  your marriage, dude. Whatever. All right. Oh,
• 1:28:12
  yeah. We got 135 days until the NFL begins. And
• 1:28:23
  Jimmy Garoppolo just retired. He's had sex with
• 1:28:29
  so many beautiful women. That's good for him.
• 1:28:34
  Mike Tomlin replaced Tony Dungy at NBC Sports.
• 1:28:40
  And we got this headline here from Jordan Hudson.
• 1:28:47
  She is supposedly taking over Bill Belichick's
• 1:28:51
  trademarks. which his family was supposed to
• 1:28:54
  have. We all know that Jordan Hudson is a dirty,
• 1:28:58
  rotten hag who thinks she's above people, who
• 1:29:02
  thinks she's better than people, but she's probably
• 1:29:04
  not even that good at sex. She's annoying. Let's
• 1:29:10
  let this music play out. Mm -hmm. Yeah. Happy
• 1:29:28
  Hot Topic. Let me click on this right here. See
• 1:29:32
  what's going on. I'm always like three days late
• 1:29:36
  on like figuring out what just happened. Travis
• 1:29:41
  Kelsey doesn't always pick up on clues. In fact,
• 1:29:44
  when his brother Jason. Yeah, because he's a
• 1:29:46
  dumb jock. Wife Kylie Kelsey announced they were
• 1:29:49
  expecting their first baby together with a special
• 1:29:52
  gift. The gesture went right over Travis's head.
• 1:29:55
  Like the boss did this year. He explained it
• 1:29:58
  in an April 22nd episode of his and Jason's New
• 1:30:00
  Heights podcast. I'm over here opening a humidor
• 1:30:03
  and there's like two boots and I'm like, why
• 1:30:05
  the f*** are there like baby socks? Oh, the fake
• 1:30:11
  laughter. And then I look up at Kylie, I'm like,
• 1:30:13
  thanks for the humidor, but what the f***? It
• 1:30:15
  seems the NFL star's baby radar hasn't gotten
• 1:30:18
  any better over the years. Oh, yeah. Can you
• 1:30:22
  imagine if him and Taylor have kids? Oh, my God.
• 1:30:25
  No good. After all, when the podcast's social
• 1:30:29
  media director, Jake Chatzky, revealed that he
• 1:30:32
  was expecting with his wife during the episode,
• 1:30:34
  Travis didn't connect the dots at first. Dude,
• 1:30:37
  are you kidding me? I'm always like three days
• 1:30:39
  late. Because you have CT and you're a moron.
• 1:30:42
  I'm like figuring out what the fuck just happened.
• 1:30:46
  But the Kansas City Chiefs tight end always scores
• 1:30:49
  a touchdown when it comes to his uncle. What
• 1:30:51
  a kiss -ass reporter. He's stupid. He's in a
• 1:30:54
  fake relationship. I still don't believe him
• 1:30:57
  and Taylor. Mm -hmm. In fact, Kylie shares kids
• 1:31:01
  Wyatt, Elliot, Bennett, and Finley with Jason,
• 1:31:03
  revealed the couple's little girls can't get
• 1:31:06
  enough of Uncle Trav. Whatever, Uncle Trav. Sounds
• 1:31:10
  like an STD. This guy was a walking STD. No!
• 1:31:16
  Hot topic. We'll live forever, man. I was taking
• 1:31:20
  80 milligram fentanyls, two in the morning, stuffing
• 1:31:23
  them under my gums here. The scary thing about
• 1:31:26
  fentanyl, it is 100 times stronger than morphine
• 1:31:29
  and it is 50 times stronger than heroin. I had
• 1:31:32
  two 300 milligram patches of fentanyl on my legs
• 1:31:36
  and they gave me six 1 ,500 milligram fentanyl
• 1:31:40
  lollipops to eat. I went to the pharmacy. He
• 1:31:43
  goes, you should be dead. We have never seen
• 1:31:46
  a human being take this much fentanyl. It is
• 1:31:48
  weird that he's dead. No. I find it hard to believe
• 1:31:51
  that even though those were prescribed, that
• 1:31:54
  the use and how often he was using it was the
• 1:31:57
  way it was prescribed. It probably wasn't. He's
• 1:32:02
  a moron and he's dead. No bombshell during his
• 1:32:05
  final interview last year for the Netflix docuseries
• 1:32:08
  Hulk Hogan, Real American. Another low point,
• 1:32:12
  a suicide attempt after a drug and alcohol binge.
• 1:32:15
  I just went down this rabbit hole for a couple
• 1:32:17
  of days. I know someone that knows the dude that
• 1:32:20
  was banging Linda Hogan after their divorce.
• 1:32:23
  He got to be Eskimo brothers with her. Next thing
• 1:32:28
  I know, I'm sitting in front of my bathroom with
• 1:32:30
  a gun in my mouth. Oh, it sucks. ...official
• 1:32:36
  cause of death in July. What's up? Bubba the
• 1:32:38
  Love Sponge there? ...of last year was ruled
• 1:32:40
  to be a heart attack. Hulk Hogan didn't die of
• 1:32:43
  a fentanyl overdose, but fentanyl being prescribed
• 1:32:46
  in this massive amount in the long term with
• 1:32:50
  his life, it affected him and affected his heart.
• 1:32:53
  What? Poor guy. Oh, yeah. 8 -5 -6. 49 Hoppy.
• 1:33:06
  It's 8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -7 -3. You can tweet
• 1:33:11
  at me at RyanHoppyRadio. You can always email
• 1:33:14
  me. RyanHoppyRadio at gmail .com. This show is
• 1:33:17
  for the hard -working average Joe and Jane that
• 1:33:20
  grind in life. I don't care where you live. As
• 1:33:25
  long as you're listening. That's all that matters.
• 1:33:29
  Let's try out this right here. Oh, yeah. Whatever.
• 1:33:49
  I am so drunk right now. If you're listening
• 1:33:53
  to me, listen to me a little longer. I know I've
• 1:33:57
  been loud and obnoxious. But I'm just trying
• 1:34:02
  to entertain you guys. It's all I care about.
• 1:34:06
  So, if you got anything that makes you intoxicated,
• 1:34:10
  marijuana, alcohol, or other things we won't
• 1:34:14
  talk about, let's do this together. You ready?
• 1:34:20
  You ready? Because I am right here. My mouth's
• 1:34:27
  getting into this yingling flight. Let me open
• 1:34:31
  it. One second. I'm a little drunk. I never drink
• 1:34:34
  before my show, but I'm in my childhood home
• 1:34:36
  where my grandpa and my dad died. So it's a little
• 1:34:39
  traumatizing. Oh, yeah. Open up that beer. Let
• 1:34:43
  me chug it. I'm going to chug it. Why did I get
• 1:35:02
  fired from Robert's Morning Glory 11 years ago?
• 1:35:04
  For the same thing I'm doing now. Yeah. Whatever.
• 1:35:12
  What up, Shane French? This is one of those shows
• 1:35:17
  that if you're listening this long, we're in
• 1:35:22
  an exclusive club. We're hanging out. We're doing
• 1:35:28
  our thing. And we're having a good time. I miss
• 1:35:35
  my Luna. My mom has this cat named Bob. He's
• 1:35:38
  a good guy. He hangs out. What do you hate, Luna?
• 1:35:45
  Luna's my girl. She's so cute. Whatever. RyanHoppyRadio
• 1:36:12
  .com Hoppy Hour will be right back. Whenever
• 1:36:14
  we're going outside, all I smell is poop. And
• 1:36:20
  we'll call it a day. As a reminder, if you don't
• 1:36:25
  feel like listening to this next song, you can
• 1:36:27
  skip over it. But Ryan Hoppy of Hoppy Hour takes
• 1:36:30
  pride in his selection, so stick around, folks.
• 1:37:05
  Pull up, pull up, pull up, pull up, pull up,
• 1:37:06
  pull up on the track. Keep a rhyme like mustard.
• 1:37:08
  Work spurtly and all the time like mustard. I
• 1:37:11
  see you when I see you. Work trying to keep up
• 1:37:14
  with my posse too. Go hypey, dumb, clumpin' too.
• 1:37:17
  Get a piece of the pie like pumpkins do. Don
• 1:37:20
  Millie gets silly. Outro Music Oh, yeah. Welcome
• 1:39:44
  back. We have a few more things. Here is CJ McCollum,
• 1:39:48
  the Atlanta Hawks player. He totally balled out
• 1:39:54
  the other night and beat the Knicks. Here he
• 1:39:58
  is saying he's not a villain. I am no villain.
• 1:40:00
  I'm a nice guy with two kids and a wife. A hot
• 1:40:03
  -ass wife that's a dentist. So she knows not
• 1:40:06
  to use teeth. I think it's admiration. Great,
• 1:40:11
  passionate fans in a really hostile environment.
• 1:40:14
  It's fun. It's basketball. It's the playoffs.
• 1:40:16
  And if anything, I think it's a sign of respect.
• 1:40:20
  There you go. All right. It's time for Chicago
• 1:40:27
  News. Oh, yeah. We're going to do our thing.
• 1:40:31
  Can you tell I'm a little drunk? I'm feeling
• 1:40:35
  good until the morning. Flyin' from the go, y
• 1:40:42
  'all. Brian and the Bulls stayin' tall. Yeah.
• 1:40:52
  Six. Yeah. Six mad, but he bendin' these mics.
• 1:41:01
  All intending heights, not a cynic or type. From
• 1:41:04
  the berms to the block, that's a hell of a hike.
• 1:41:06
  Turn the dial, see his name on the lights. He
• 1:41:09
  got callers on the line trying to break they
• 1:41:11
  news. From the shy to the slick, stay related
• 1:41:14
  to the views. Every segment like a story from
• 1:41:16
  the avenue. Turn slick, then he fact check the
• 1:41:19
  attitude. This that Chicago news. Hop in, I will
• 1:41:25
  let them choose. He got jokes for the frauds,
• 1:41:45
  love for the brave, that could guess in the chance,
• 1:41:48
  say what they crave. From the sports war wars
• 1:41:50
  to the gossip wave, he connect more lanes than
• 1:41:53
  the tow -way saves. Late night, but the center
• 1:41:56
  get wide, Carolina to the bay, hit a mid -wet's
• 1:41:59
  pride. Still a kid from the ice with the driving
• 1:42:02
  side, got the whole damn map on the same live
• 1:42:05
  line. Live from the go, y 'all. Go, y 'all. Live
• 1:43:16
  from the go, y 'all. Live from the go, y 'all.
• 1:43:19
  Go, y 'all. Yeah. Hey. Oh, yeah. Live from the
• 1:43:24
  go, y 'all. Go, y 'all. Live from the go, y 'all.
• 1:43:27
  Go, y 'all. I heard you. Live from the go, y
• 1:43:30
  'all. What's going on with these people? The
• 1:43:32
  Chicago News. Live from the go, y 'all. Live
• 1:43:36
  from the go, y 'all. Everyone's favorite dirty,
• 1:43:38
  rotten moron. Go, y 'all. Live from the go, y
• 1:43:41
  'all. Tiffany Hanyard. She's the worst. She's
• 1:43:48
  a heck. She's terrible. Well, Terrence, Tiffany
• 1:43:53
  Hanyard. We're saying her name again here in
• 1:43:55
  Dalton. Can Tiffany Hanyard just go away? She's
• 1:43:59
  the absolute worst. She makes women look bad.
• 1:44:02
  She makes everyone look bad. She makes human
• 1:44:04
  beings look bad. She's probably the reason aliens
• 1:44:07
  haven't visited. They're like, I don't want to
• 1:44:09
  be on the same planet as Tiffany Hanyard. I realized
• 1:44:12
  that they took down the signs. There used to
• 1:44:14
  still be some signs up with her name and picture,
• 1:44:18
  but they're all gone these days. Tiffany Henyard,
• 1:44:20
  she had to go before the Fulton County Board
• 1:44:22
  of Commissioners. There was a residency challenge
• 1:44:25
  there, and she told them that she's a liar. She
• 1:44:29
  has fake hair. She has a fake personality. Of
• 1:44:32
  course she would lie. Moved to Fulton County
• 1:44:34
  last May. She was still technically mayor of
• 1:44:39
  Dalton and being paid as mayor of Dalton. But
• 1:44:42
  she moved there and she wants to remain on the
• 1:44:44
  ballot. And they looked at her case. Oh, Georgia,
• 1:44:48
  you got to deal with that moron. And they approved.
• 1:44:50
  They said she can't stay on the ballot in Fulton.
• 1:44:53
  Enjoy that, Georgia. You got backwards laws and
• 1:44:56
  you let a backwards politician join. County,
• 1:44:59
  so she's running for county commissioner in their
• 1:45:03
  primary next month and she is running as a Republican.
• 1:45:06
  Oh, yeah. She was so Democratic in Illinois.
• 1:45:10
  She's fake like Trump. She began as a Democrat
• 1:45:13
  and became a Republican to grift. Because she
• 1:45:17
  knows she was kicked out of Illinois and she
• 1:45:19
  needed to go somewhere. Tiffany Henner, she used
• 1:45:22
  to call herself Super Mayor. She was a social
• 1:45:24
  media sensation. If you're calling yourself Super
• 1:45:27
  Mayor, you're a loser. Loves fashion. She tried
• 1:45:29
  her hand at recording a song. She was an attention
• 1:45:32
  seeker. She tried, but she failed because she's
• 1:45:34
  a moron. Seeker, the first woman of color to
• 1:45:37
  become Thornton Township Super... She makes other
• 1:45:39
  people of color look bad. In addition to Dalton
• 1:45:42
  Mayer, she had public service jobs, fans and
• 1:45:45
  followers. If you're a fan of Tiffany Hanyard,
• 1:45:48
  you have the IQ of two. And she was investigated
• 1:45:51
  by the FBI for government spending by former
• 1:45:53
  mayor, federal prosecutor, cuter Lori Lightfoot
• 1:45:56
  and independent investigation. Yeah. When you
• 1:45:59
  have Lori Lightfoot looking into you being corrupt,
• 1:46:02
  which Lori Lightfoot was corrupt. That's weird.
• 1:46:07
  Lifewood found that the Hanyard administration
• 1:46:09
  ran up credit cards and spent without keeping
• 1:46:12
  track of what they were buying. Here in Dalton,
• 1:46:14
  the residents know that she brought attention
• 1:46:16
  to their town and they were polite. And made
• 1:46:19
  the town look bad. And if you're polite towards
• 1:46:21
  her, you're pretty much endorsing her. When finding
• 1:46:25
  out, Hanyard is running again. Why is everyone
• 1:46:28
  in Illinois so nice to her? She's a moron. Again.
• 1:46:33
  Okay. All right. Now. Okay. I'm grasping. Oh,
• 1:46:38
  OK. Well, hopefully she can learn from the. She's
• 1:46:43
  not going to learn because she was Democratic
• 1:46:45
  in Illinois and now she's Republican in Georgia.
• 1:46:48
  She's a moron. She's a liar and a failure. Previous
• 1:46:52
  situations. I'm not going to let you talk. You're
• 1:46:56
  defending your own kind and that's fine. But
• 1:46:58
  she's not going to learn because she was never
• 1:47:01
  Republican and now she's Democratic. She's lying,
• 1:47:05
  like this moron. I slipped her an Altoid, not
• 1:47:08
  as a joke, but I thought she might want one.
• 1:47:11
  George W. Bush believes he knows why his friendship
• 1:47:14
  with Michelle Obama always makes headlines. Of
• 1:47:18
  course he makes friends, or of course George
• 1:47:20
  Bush makes headlines. He has his daughter, the
• 1:47:23
  nipple baby, the head of the Today Show. She
• 1:47:25
  pushes it along. Hey, you got a job because of
• 1:47:31
  nipples? Just like Mojo's son Joe show on FLZ
• 1:47:35
  in Tampa. Today's show exclusive ahead of the
• 1:47:38
  USA's 250th anniversary and recalled his reaction
• 1:47:42
  to a viral 2018 moment with the then first lady.
• 1:47:46
  The pair had been sitting together at John McCain.
• 1:47:48
  I don't give a fuck anymore. I'm drunk. I'm going
• 1:47:51
  to go to drink more. They're used to hard work
• 1:48:29
  here. We think this is hard. It could be worse
• 1:48:32
  though. At least we're not Detroit. We're not
• 1:48:36
  Detroit. The masses, sports, you know, keep people
• 1:48:39
  from looking at their own lives and realizing
• 1:48:41
  how bad they've actually gotten, you know? I
• 1:48:44
  mean, if you can get drunk and paint yourself
• 1:48:49
  orange and brown every Sunday, you might realize,
• 1:48:52
  I live in Cleveland. And then you look around
• 1:49:04
  at your tiny little house that you can't afford
• 1:49:06
  because of the mortgage crisis and your horrible
• 1:49:08
  little sloppy kids who have diabetes by the time
• 1:49:10
  they're eight and they live on corn syrup and
• 1:49:12
  lye. And then you look at your big bloated mess
• 1:49:16
  of a wife and she waddles towards you with her
• 1:49:18
  front butt spilling out over the top of her ass
• 1:49:20
  in Washington. And you think, I'm going to go
• 1:49:22
  shoot myself and my pregnant small girl daughter,
• 1:49:25
  right? Do you regret anything that you said about
• 1:49:32
  Cleveland? Not at all. Cleveland's cool? I mean,
• 1:49:39
  I've never heard anybody say, I'm going to Cleveland
• 1:49:41
  on vacation. What's so great about Cleveland?
• 1:49:47
  Cleveland sucks! Cleveland sucks! Cleveland sucks!
• 1:49:53
  Cleveland sucks! As long as you follow your dreams,
• 1:50:22
  no matter how crazy or against the law it is.
• 1:50:25
  Except for Sasquatch. Because Sasquatch is really
• 1:50:29
  so different. Forgetting me, what? I'm a circus
• 1:50:32
  freak. That's all I'll ever be. Whatever. Finally,
• 1:50:37
  I'm one of those guys who can't wait to get to
• 1:50:38
  work in the morning. Like a dairy cow. Oh! Oh!
• 1:50:44
  Oh, yes! Yes! Oh! Yeah, hey, I'd like a $9 ,000
• 1:51:16
  prostitute, please. Oh, do you have nine $1 ,000
• 1:51:20
  ones? Yeah, good, and if you got an albino, send
• 1:51:23
  her up, too. In, like, 20 minutes, I'm gonna
• 1:51:25
  be asleep, so get him up here. I had, like, half
• 1:51:28
  a bottle of melatonin, six beers, this whole
• 1:51:32
  f***ing bucket of chicken. Oh, the Sandman is
• 1:51:35
  coming. Oh, yeah! What is it now, Hoop? Have
• 1:52:20
  you turned on the TV lately? No, why? Oh, it's
• 1:52:39
  a second time. Order now and get sack flashers,
• 1:52:43
  too. Sacks in the city. With bonus material,
• 1:52:45
  beach balls. All right. First one. Call us. It
• 1:52:51
  says free sack flashers, cold sack. Operators
• 1:52:53
  are standing by. You'll be nuts to pass up on
• 1:52:55
  this offer. I made someone a shirt. And a nightlight
• 1:52:59
  or something. Oh, what's that sign? What is that?
• 1:53:08
  That's our Mr. Great -Grandpappy. Oh, he loves
• 1:53:11
  him a good butt hole. I told you not, never,
• 1:53:13
  ever, not, no, damn, don't, never, verbulate
• 1:53:16
  that man's name in the house again. I don't think
• 1:53:19
  you said his name. Some of us were a little too
• 1:53:21
  busy banging the exchange business cards. Don't
• 1:53:25
  you go Facebook him on the iBox, neither. Sheriff
• 1:53:27
  says you raised him down hell down at the library.
• 1:53:29
  Yeah, you know I did. You're going strong. A
• 1:53:39
  real live robot? Or is that some kind of cheesy
• 1:53:42
  New Year's costume? Bite my shiny metal ass.
• 1:53:46
  It doesn't look so shiny to me. Shiner than yours,
• 1:53:49
  meatbag. And that is that. Hoppy Hour. Hoppy
• 1:54:28
  Hour. It's time for Hoppy. Good morning. RyanHoppyRadio
• 1:54:41
  .com. Hoppy Hour will be right back. As a reminder,
• 1:54:57
  if you don't feel like listening to this next
• 1:54:59
  song, you can skip over it. But Ryan Hoppy of
• 1:55:01
  Hoppy Hour takes pride in his selection, so stick
• 1:55:04
  around, folks. Blow the candles out, blow the
• 1:55:37
  candles out. Sagittarius, birthday November 27th.
• 1:55:40
  Feel like that until I end up in one of heaven.
• 1:55:43
  They be thinkin' I be claimin' the fortune with
• 1:55:45
  the boys they handin' out. Yeah, for the custom
• 1:55:47
  made to wish it. Blow the candles out, blow the
• 1:55:50
  all -white phantom out. I'm a gun with the pants
• 1:55:52
  and the shirt and the shoes and the hat with
• 1:55:53
  the shades and the chains and the watch is the
• 1:55:54
  reason I be standin' out. That's where I should
• 1:55:56
  spin that cake while I take the icing off the
• 1:55:58
  cake. Uh -huh, it's custom V -Day, y 'all. Come
• 1:56:00
  on, everybody, it's custom V -Day. It's like
• 1:57:28
  a mental patient. I floss like a dentist patient.
• 1:58:18
  Yeah. Yeah. The hour will be right back. that
• 1:59:32
  begin their show with like seven live reads or
• 1:59:35
  sponsors. I'm like, who's listening to that?
• 1:59:40
  If I were that sponsor, I'd be pissed off. But
• 1:59:45
  what do I know? A lot. This following segment
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  .com, R -Y -A -N -H -O -P -P -E radio .com. I
• 2:01:45
  would hope you know how to spell radio. Or it's
• 2:01:48
  in my podcast section. So whenever you listen
• 2:01:50
  to Hoppy Hour like you are right now in the podcast
• 2:01:53
  description is all of that. We're going to come
• 2:01:58
  back on Hoppy Hour. Keep this party going and
• 2:02:02
  going. I was labeled as slow when I started school.
• 2:02:32
  Come to find out at the end. Now at the age of
• 2:02:37
  48, I have completed an associate's degree in
• 2:02:40
  radio broadcasting and worked in the San Francisco
• 2:02:42
  Bay Area as an on -air personality. So yes, I
• 2:02:45
  am different. People with autism have no need,
• 2:02:48
  no different than you. the condition Making all
• 2:03:42
  the hoes get down. They the big man. Make you
• 2:03:46
  change swans. Them center players gonna do the
• 2:03:49
  damn thing. Coming to the club. Taking up streets.
• 2:03:52
  Taking over man. Let them go without fear. Got
• 2:03:56
  them on charge. Got them on lock. Everywhere
• 2:03:59
  we go. Guaranteed to build a spot. Message to
• 2:04:01
  them haters. Trying to say them gays. Oh, it's
• 2:04:04
  gonna blaze. And nothing is gonna save you. That's
• 2:04:07
  on the street. That's on the beat. If you wanna
• 2:04:10
  bounce, bet. Every point to me City shots high
• 2:04:13
  Where I pull it down Ain't no limit Drop a piece
• 2:04:17
  about a pound Calls out a lot Cause you know
• 2:04:19
  I call it shots I can take a lot Pimpin', slide
• 2:05:04
  off in the club, feelin' menace in the 50s Don't
• 2:05:07
  fret, don't think, I'm slaggin', I'm lippin'
• 2:05:09
  What it is, what it do? Come on, shout it, let
• 2:05:13
  me see you get loose You about to see some Grey
• 2:05:16
  Goose I want two hot niggas poundin' Smoke, yank,
• 2:05:51
  smoke, yank Smoke, yank, smoke, yank Smoke, yank,
• 2:05:58
  smoke, yank We be gettin' broke down We be gettin'
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  the best printing company in all of the Bay Area.
• 2:07:59
  Business cards, posters, yard signs, whatever
• 2:08:02
  the hell you need, print it up. I'll go. Hi there.
• 2:08:06
  Finally, I mentally all like Maine. If you live
• 2:08:11
  in Florida or Maryland, go to counselingoncall
• 2:08:13
  .net and there you can sign on. We're going to
• 2:08:20
  come back and I'll be out and keep this party
• 2:08:22
  going. Hello again. It's your favorite San Francisco
• 2:08:26
  DJ, Hammer Hank. I may look normal, but the truth
• 2:08:30
  is I have a condition called autism. That's right.
• 2:08:33
  It's a condition, not a disease. That is, autism
• 2:08:36
  can strike anyone, regardless of who they are.
• 2:08:39
  People with autism normally have difficulties
• 2:08:42
  in verbal and nonverbal communication skills,
• 2:08:44
  social interactions, and leisure activities.
• 2:08:54
  I beat Josh by having loving friends and family,
• 2:08:57
  having a college education. I have even worked
• 2:09:00
  in the San Francisco Bay Area as an honorary
• 2:09:02
  personality for many years. Always remember that
• 2:09:05
  people with autism want the same things as you,
• 2:09:07
  to be happy and successful. To find out more
• 2:09:09
  about autism, please contact your local mental
• 2:09:12
  health center or visit AutismStreets .org. This
• 2:09:16
  is Dan Bernanke, and I appreciate your kindness.
• 2:09:20
  Playing cold breaks. Hoppy's hour almost done.
• 2:09:23
  Feels like robbery in banks. Trying Hoppy on
• 2:09:25
  the mic. Dropping wisdom in streams. Syndicated
• 2:09:28
  sorrow. Now it's time to shatter dreams. Oh,
• 2:09:30
  the Hoppy album's coming to a close. Radio hits
• 2:09:33
  made like a Wilson pose. Laughter and joy dissolving
• 2:09:37
  in the air. But we keep the rhythm. Oh, life's
• 2:09:40
  just so unfair. After school and gym, eardrums
• 2:09:50
  mix and hop me like fingers without rings. VHX
• 2:09:53
  to FNM, shoutouts hit the street. But soon as
• 2:09:55
  sound will vanish like shadows in the heat. Thank
• 2:10:20
  you. Thank you. Like clockwork to a show Now
• 2:10:51
  it's time to face the silence Like a TV on snow
• 2:10:53
  Riot Hoppy held the mic With humor so divine
• 2:10:56
  The void left in our hearts Wider than a canyon
• 2:10:59
  line Line Empty speakers, silence I've become
• 2:11:07
  into an end Like a roller coaster Stopping while
• 2:11:10
  the rivers bend Hoppy's jokes and bad scenes
• 2:11:12
  Are daily grind Now silence flowers And the thoughts
• 2:11:15
  we can't rewind We're the Hoppy Art Happy hour.
• 2:11:41
  Happy hour. It's time for hockey in the morning.
• 2:11:54
  RyanHockeyRadio .com I like that. You're probably
• 2:11:59
  in. Hoppy Hour is now over. Hoppy Hour is now
• 2:12:22
  over. Game over. This concludes our broadcast
• 2:12:37
  day. Bless America.