Latest / Holding It Together (Kinda) / # 3 Episode Companion Memory Is Not A Care Plan When Stress Hits

Transcript

# 3 Episode Companion Memory Is Not A Care Plan When Stress Hits · Holding It Together (Kinda)

• 0:02
  Michael Mackniak: Hello everybody and welcome to this midweek unpack for Holding It Together kinda.
• 0:06
  Michael Mackniak: I'm Michael Makniak.
• 0:08
  Michael Mackniak: Again, we're we're gonna dig into an old episode and we're going to uh talk just you and me for just a few minutes here.
• 0:18
  Michael Mackniak: And uh the episode that I want to review this this week is this is this is what it takes episode.
• 0:24
  Michael Mackniak: Uh I had my friend and and uh partner Victoria Cure come on, and we explored what happens when caregivers are expected to remember every single detail, translate a loved one to rushed medical systems, uh maintain calm while carrying that fear, that anxiety, that stress, that worry.
• 0:50
  Michael Mackniak: So this conversation really hits home for a lot of people.
• 0:54
  Michael Mackniak: Um, and I hope that uh if you're new here, you'll go back and check out the episode.
• 0:58
  Michael Mackniak: And of course, I'm really encourage everybody to download the free PDF that's going to be attached to this uh little unpacking uh companion so that you have a tool uh to do to do to the work where it may resonate with you.
• 1:15
  Michael Mackniak: Um and if it doesn't, that's fine too.
• 1:17
  Michael Mackniak: This isn't about homework, this isn't about adding extra uh to your already full plate, it's about you know maybe connecting further with the materials that you really believe in.
• 1:29
  Michael Mackniak: So we went back and built a uh companion specifically for This Is What It Takes, and it is available right now along with this brief podcast.
• 1:40
  Michael Mackniak: So let's just start with how this particular uh this particular episode works.
• 1:47
  Michael Mackniak: It starts uh with this concept of the invisible caregiver loop.
• 1:53
  Michael Mackniak: It helps you to map responsibilities that you have and that you keep replaying in your head to help you to write them down, delegate them, or even automate them, you know, with all the electronics and all the IT we have these days.
• 2:07
  Michael Mackniak: I'd really love to see you guys work on automating some of the things that you uh find yourselves faced with.
• 2:15
  Michael Mackniak: We talk about dignity-centered crisis planning, helping you to document, document baseline behavior.
• 2:23
  Michael Mackniak: What does your loved one look like when they are not in crisis?
• 2:26
  Michael Mackniak: This is really important.
• 2:27
  Michael Mackniak: And identify early warning signs, um, crisis thresholds before everything becomes overwhelming uh and you know the shit really hits the fan.
• 2:38
  Michael Mackniak: We also, you know, basically help get you prepared for what you might want to do before your kid turns 18 if you're worrying about taking care of your child.
• 2:48
  Michael Mackniak: You know, what happens when the child turns 18 and now they're legally of adult status and and they have medical access, records access, decision-making authority.
• 2:58
  Michael Mackniak: We talk a little bit about that.
• 3:00
  Michael Mackniak: You might want to give some notes and some thought to that.
• 3:03
  Michael Mackniak: And also, if you're uh frequently using the emergency room, you may need an ER-ready summary sheet so that you know a rushed medical team can get clear facts really quickly from you.
• 3:19
  Michael Mackniak: We say that memory is not a care plan.
• 3:22
  Michael Mackniak: Stress reduces working memory under pressure.
• 3:25
  Michael Mackniak: I mean, that seems to be pretty obvious.
• 3:28
  Michael Mackniak: If you're stressed out, you aren't gonna remember every detail, you're gonna come back later, you know, you're gonna have that V8 moment from the old commercials and say, Oh, I should have done this, I should have said that.
• 3:39
  Michael Mackniak: These external tools aren't a sign that caregivers failing, they're part of a safe, sustainable coordination that you have to use to maintain your own level of functionality, I suppose.
• 3:55
  Michael Mackniak: So, in the in the end of the companion, I want you to think about tasks that um are really sucking up a lot of your brain space, they're renting a lot of space in your head.
• 4:06
  Michael Mackniak: Let's update your medication list, allergies, decision documents, that kind of thing.
• 4:11
  Michael Mackniak: Make sure that's getting done.
• 4:13
  Michael Mackniak: Share a practical need with a family member, you know, be specific about what your needs may be.
• 4:19
  Michael Mackniak: For do a friend, a loved one, a provider, say, hey, I could really use you to go grocery shopping for me.
• 4:25
  Michael Mackniak: Do can you help me with with my lawn?
• 4:28
  Michael Mackniak: You know, anything.
• 4:31
  Michael Mackniak: When you first listen to this is what it takes, and if you haven't, you're obviously welcome to go back and listen.
• 4:38
  Michael Mackniak: I want you to listen to it with this uh companion alongside you.
• 4:42
  Michael Mackniak: Um and if something resonates with you, find it in the companion and and write it out, and maybe it can really help to clarify what you are thinking about.
• 4:55
  Michael Mackniak: Um, and and you know, there's a lot of lot to be said about the action of putting pen to paper and and actually going through that overt process, and it's cathartic to a lot of people.
• 5:08
  Michael Mackniak: So, okay, guys, until next time, keep holding it together, even if it's just kinda.