Latest / Unsilenced with Blanket Fort Hope / Most conversations about trafficking start with girls — and end there too.

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Most conversations about trafficking start with girls — and end there too. · Unsilenced with Blanket Fort Hope

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: The boys, no one is looking for. Most conversations about
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: trafficking start with girls. And it ends there, too. That
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: focus does matter. However, the statistics are staggering. The need
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: is urgent. The stories are heartbreaking. So today we want
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: to talk about something that most people don't talk about, Kim.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: The boys.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: The boys who were trafficked, the numbers have increased over
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: the past few years. There is nowhere for boys to
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: go because we mostly think it's a girl problem. My
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: name is Alexa Likas-James, and I am the CEO and
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: founder of Blanket Fort Hope.
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: My name is Kim Meshago, and I'm the executive director
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: of Blanket Fort Hope. This is Unsilenced, the voices trafficking
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: tried to erase.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Somewhere in your city, a child is being sold. and
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: the people doing it are counting on your silence. This
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: is Unsilenced, The Voices Trafficking Tried to Erase, a Blanket
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Fort Hope podcast. I'm Alexa James.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: And I'm Kim Macheco.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Fort. Today we are opening a door
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: that almost no one in this country has been willing
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: to talk about.
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: And we're walking through it.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're walking through it. We are. When most people
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: picture a trafficking survivor, Kim... They picture a girl. And
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: I mean, a lot of our studies that we do,
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: that's true. But I've heard so many different numbers over
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: the year. I think the data does skew. I really do, female.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: But here is what the data also tells us. And
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: I think, you know, one of the things you and
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: I talk about, and I've talked a lot about with
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: Blanket Fort Hope, that really it's hard to tell somebody
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: the average age Because where are they getting that from?
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: Exactly.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: And even in our own state, you and I have
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: talked about we want to make change. We want to
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: be a part of change. And we've just not had
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: opportunity to be a part of that. And as disheartening
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: as that has been, because you and I both want
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: to make that change, I believe that we have this
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: opportunity to say these things here on our podcast that
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: You know, when we say 12 to 18 is the
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: average age, well, is it really? Because I hear about
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: 10-year-olds and 5-year-olds all the time. I just heard about
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: a six-month-old two weeks ago. That's right. We know that
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: there's been an uptick, according to numbers and the skewed numbers,
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: by 30% with boys because of all the COVID stuff.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: We know that porn went up by thousands of percent
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: during COVID because people were bored at home and they
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: were making money. more porn at home. There was more
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: domestic violence, which then causes children to react, run away.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: You've got to live. You're on the street. You're couch surfing.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: And I think that males, male survivors, I think, face
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: a unique and crushing set of barriers these days because nobody,
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: their shame, their stigma, The culture narrative is always just
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: about girls. You know, there's this big tough guy and
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: they don't want to talk about. And there was a
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: study done a while ago. I do. And this one
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: was a study that was done among victims that the
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: average age for a boy to be abused is between
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: 11 and 15. And that was mind boggling to me.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: I'm like, but they're 15. And it's because that is
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: when they feel the most. Misunderstood and insecure.
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: I mean, think about even girls.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: But boys especially.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: Exactly.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: And the lack of language to describe what's happened to
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: them and the absence of anyone who looks like them
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: in recovery programs. There aren't any. I don't know of
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: any in our state.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: You may. I don't know of any in our state.
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: I don't know of any that are specifically for young men.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: That's the vast majority is female, right?
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that basically focus on trafficking. And I think that's
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: a message in and of itself in our state. It is.
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: And something that we have to pay close attention to.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: Because a young man who has been trafficked, like you
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: said before, has a specific set of circumstances. Because whenever
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: we talk about these things, the language is focused on
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: young women. And so young men learn to take up
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: as little of that space as possible.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: That's good.
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: And they rehearse their story and get the version down
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: to a size and a language that will... They think
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: is acceptable. They think is acceptable. And they think will
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: not cause anyone to feel uncomfortable. Right.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Boys who survive trafficking and they actually get out, there's
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: not a door for them to walk through, Kim.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: Correct.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: And I have boys, so I think about this a
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: whole lot. And we are going to change this conversation.
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: If we have to have this conversation five more times
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: on a podcast, I want this to be heard.
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: We don't want them to feel directly hurt. or hear
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: directly or even indirectly that their experience doesn't count the
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: same as a female experience.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: And so why do you think so many feel that way?
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: I think because of what we're talking about today.
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: When we talk about human trafficking, most times we do
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: focus on young women and we don't say enough, boys
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: and girls. We really paint the picture.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: And I still have people say, really?
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: Yes, this happens to boys. But yes, it does.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: I wish people would go back and just even read
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: some studies through all of the COVID stuff about when
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: that porn went up. It was thousands of percent.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: These kids were living at home when that happened.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: That's right. People are becoming desensitized. They're angry. They're doing
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: things that they already kind of have the disposition to
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: do and haven't.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: And they're having more time.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: They're having more time to do it.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: And what child at 12 or 13 does not already feel,
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: just by natural maturation, you feel like, you're unaccepted or
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: you're not cute enough just because of the standards that
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: Facebook and the information highway has laid out before these kids.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: And I think that, you know, what I want to
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: say about what invisible actually looks like in practice, because
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: we've seen it up close. And when we tell y'all
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: invisible things, That mean invisible. I hear stories. I heard
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: a story from a teacher that's retired about boys just
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: recently and that had been abused at home, but would
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: just come in with his hoodie on, hunkered down on
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: the floor and just whining all the time because he'd
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: been abused. But nobody wanted to believe that because they're boys.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: They're boys. And you may see a young man with
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: a hoodie on and You know, before we ask questions,
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: we just assume that's just what they want to do.
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: They're just wearing a hoodie. Right. You know, and sometimes
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: we see changes in young men. Yes. But they don't
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: always strike the same chord as when we see changes
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: in young women. And so a lot of times we
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: don't ask them the questions. You know, and many times
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: they are encouraged indirectly. to remain invisible and remain silent.
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: Because sometimes the systems and the homes and the programs
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: of going out and finding foster families, we don't always,
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: like I said before, say that we're searching for boys
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: and girls who have been trafficked or who are at
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: risk of trafficking. And I know that that is an
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: effort that we have really taken And run with it.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: And run with it to make sure that we incorporate
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: what young men are facing into our narrative and into
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: the programming that we are building.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: And I think like we've been talking about in the
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: past few podcasts about dreaming and legacy. And when I
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: started Blanket Fort Hope, one of the things I would
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: think about all the time was If this was one
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: of my boys, where would I want them to live?
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: And so that was kind of the defining target of
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: what I wanted that house to look like and what
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: I wanted staff to look like. But even deeper than
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: that is.
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: I wonder if it would have been a boy. What
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: and where would that child, that young man, have been
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: able to go?
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: And so it's really deep and near to my heart.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: I want people to hear that, that it pierced my
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: heart so deeply. Just as like the little girl that
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: we talked about that changed everything.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: It's the same with these boys. That's right. When we
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: started building this out and I had time to kind
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: of think through some of this and all the COVID
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: stuff hit. And there are very few places as it
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: is for girls, but there's nowhere for these boys to go.
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  Speaker 2: Even if it were for young men.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: Yes. And... Blanket Fort Hope recently, or really the past
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: two years, we received our child placing agency license so
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: we can recruit foster families. And now I know that
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: sounds like a lot of administrative language.
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: But we can recruit foster families. That's right.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: We can recruit foster families. Yes. they're under Blanket Fort Hope,
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: so we're able to place kids. And the idea, the
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: dream always was to have something to do with foster.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: But because of God and His kindness and His goodness, Kim,
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: and that's exactly what it is. It's His kindness and
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: His goodness. He laid on my heart. that we have
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: to do this because on property we can never mix
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: girls and boys together. So what am I going to do?
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: I can't build quick enough. I can't buy property quick enough,
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: but we can get our CPA license. We can build
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: a staff to oversee that. So we want people to
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: understand that the CPA means that we'll oversee it. We
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: know where those kids go. We get to pick the
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: families that they go to. They will be part of
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: our trauma informed care. And, um, You know, just bear
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: with us as we're walking through some of this and
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: talking through some of this and try to listen and
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: let this get deep into your core about what this,
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: this is extraordinary. I think it's extraordinary what Blanket Fort
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: Hope is doing.
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And, you know, it is extraordinary because young men,
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: it's an opportunity for young men to make themselves and
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: make their needs visible.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: And what we're building is an opportunity to show young
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: men that their trauma is seen, that it's understood, and
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: that they qualify for help just the same as anyone
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: else does. So as they continue to grow and adapt,
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: they have an opportunity to heal as well, where they're
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: not minimized, where we don't say that just because you're
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: a man, you should be able to Pick yourself up
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: and walk away from this. But we understand the hurt
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: and the harm that Satan tried to do.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: You know, but there is still an opportunity and services
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: and support that will help to heal these young men.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: This authorizes Blanketport Hope to house boys. And girls, 0
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: to 21. 21 years old. And there is nowhere like this. Yes.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: And the ability that we can send them to school
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: and to college.
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: And help the trajectory of their life to change forever
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: because of this opportunity. And I just think it's so exciting.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: I hate that we have to do it, but I'm
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: so thankful to our generous Lord that has allowed us
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: to be able to, because this is deep in his heart.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: And we've got to help our state and we've got
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: to help our people to understand and our churches to understand.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: God has given us this unique opportunity to help that
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: we can help you understand what this looks like and
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: that it's real. And we don't have to be afraid
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: of it, but we've got to jump in, dive in,
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: dig and help.
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: And with all children, including boys, you know, we have
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: this opportunity, you know, before we build a program. before
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: we think about treatment, and before we do anything else,
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: is to show them that they are worth the effort.
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: They are created in the image of God, and they
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: are worth the effort.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 13:18
  Speaker 2: Boys and girls.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: Our children.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely they are. And I'm going to let you
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: go here. Okay.
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: So from where I stand, because we'll be welcoming... Young
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: men through the doors.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: Blaze me away.
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: You know, we've been preparing for this. We've been building
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: our team. We've been completing training, putting in protocols. And
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: we want everyone listening, any social worker, any case manager,
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: any person who knows a boy who maybe has survived
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: trafficking or even have been at risk of trafficking. We
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: want you to hear me clearly that there is a bed.
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: There is a team. And not only a team, there's
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: an entire community who is ready to receive this young
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: man and wrap arms around him. You don't have to
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: keep looking for a safe place for this young man
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: to be restored.
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: I think one of the things you and I talked about,
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: you had asked me, when did I first know that
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: Blanket Fort Hope was called to serve boys?
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: Yes. Was there like a particular... moment? Was there a story?
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: Was there a conversation? What is it that happened that
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: stopped you in your track and thought?
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: So we always had this circle we talked about and
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: it had foster care in it. I was a little
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: bit afraid of it just because of you hear the
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: stories and I didn't know how much control that we
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: could have over that until you came on board and
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: I learned about that. But I was invited to the
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: National Child Advocacy conference in Huntsville.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: And I had the opportunity to sit under so many people.
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: And I got to sit under this judge.
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: Oh, yes.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: And he told me a story. And this changed me forever.
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: Just like the little girl. He started telling us a
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: story what his job was to teach us how to
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: get out of trauma. And I mean, you think you
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: can't ever get out of that trauma, but you can.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: So he's telling us these stories. So he can teach
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: us how to get out of the trauma for a
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: minute because these kids, they live in the red zone
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: where they want to just fight, fly, go.
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: It's kind of like if we think somebody's got a gun,
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: how we feel. They live in that moment 60 minutes
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: all the time, 24 hours a day. And so he's
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: telling us a story about a kid, I think started
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: at six, that was being trafficked by his father who
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: was a doctor. And selling to his friends and the
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: child became so desensitized that they started burning his fingers
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: just to get a reaction out of him. And it
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: was a little boy and this went on until he
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: was about 14 and he was able to escape and
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: he goes deep in, and I don't want to get
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: too deep into that here, but it, it was horrific.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: It was horrifying. It was, it was heartbreaking. Um, when
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: you think about a six year old little boy, Who's
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: being sold and he quit reacting to somebody raping him
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: and they started burning his fingers. And you're already devastated
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: hearing the story. And then this judge gets very silent.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: And Kim, he looks at me or everybody, not me,
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: and says, and that little boy was me. Wow.
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: And of course, tears start rolling down everybody's face. And
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: he says, now everybody jump up, do your thing, turn around,
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: say your name and sing a song.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: Let me get you out of this.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: Let me get you out of this trauma. He takes
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: us deep into this story, deep down this path into
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: a very dark world and then expects for me to
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: jump up, turn around, sing a song. And so that
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: was a very defining moment because he left us with hope.
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: And the way that he did that was then he
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: how God used his life, he became a judge in
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: a children's court. And he thinks, he said, I don't
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: even know why they still let me work in the
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: court because I do everything that's wrong. He said, I
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: actually build a contract with the kids that come in,
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: and I let them help me write the contract, and
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: they get to tell me what I can say in court,
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: what they can choose a word. And he said, like,
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: it might be basketball, and I might have to say
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: it every sixth sentence. So I may be talking about this,
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: and I'll have to go basketball, You know, and then
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: they have to, in turn, sign something depending on what
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: they're going through. But he had this one particular little
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: girl that had to sign that if she ran away
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: that she would call him because that was why she
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: was there, because she ran away, but her story was horrific.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: And so she did. And her word was dog. And
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: so like every second sentence he had to use the
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: word dog in the sentence. And she's very particular about
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: how he had to use the word, but he did.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: And so, you know, the court would kind of laugh
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: and lighten up and she would laugh. So it made
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: it easier for her to testify and to talk about
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: what her needs were. The next five years, that little
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: girl was placed in and out of foster homes, Kim,
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: and she would run away, but she would call him
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: every time. He never gave up on her. He went
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: and got her every time. And while we were in
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: that conference at that date, she was actually about to
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: enter college. And you know, So why wouldn't I help
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: little boys?
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: Exactly. And you always say, that could be our next judge.
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: That could be our next president.
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: And that's why.
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: That could be your doctor.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: Your city councilman, your House of Representatives, your Senate, your governor,
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: your husband, your child's husband. Yeah.
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: And that is why this work is so very important
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: for boys. It's legacy for boys and girls. But you know,
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: really this focus on boys because they are sometimes kind
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: of left out of this conversation.
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: Yes. I think we've got to get to the point
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: that we can't accept that this is happening and we've
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: got to quit saying, I don't want to hear about it.
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: I don't want to talk about it. It makes me sad.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: It scares me.
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: It does me too, as it does you. Yes.
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: And we're not living it. Right. We're not the children
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: of We're the adults on this side trying to help.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: And I really, you know, I know this is probably
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: a little harsh on a podcast, but I really feel
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: like that we all have a place here. We all
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: have an opportunity because we're the adults. And again, God
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: tells us to tie a millstone around our neck and
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: drop ourselves in the deepest part of the ocean. And
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: I think we have a responsibility to it. And it's
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: a gift. Whether you give, whether you pray, whether you volunteer,
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: you don't have to be in the middle of the work.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: You just have to be willing to talk about it.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: It has to be something that we can accept any longer.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: Let's just start the conversation there. Just say, I don't
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: accept that boys are being trafficked. I don't accept that
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: a girl is being trafficked.
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: Let's just start right there.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: And starting there starts helping the children who are in
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: that situation, and it starts preventing another child from entering
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: that situation.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: That language is strong.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: Very.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: Because you start talking about prevention. Yep.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: Because when we know about a need that's clearly a need,
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: we then have the capacity to meet it by not
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: being silent.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: And that is not a choice I was willing to
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: make was to be silent.
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: And saying it that way, there is a choice.
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: There was a choice.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: We're either going to speak out against this and not
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: just speak out against it. We are going to join
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: forces together. And say that children will not be trafficked
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: or we're going to remain silent. Yes.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: And I'll be honest, you know, with everybody. And Kim,
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: you know this about me. I wanted to go out
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: of that room screaming as fast and as hard as
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: I could. And as soon as I could get out
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: of there, I had to go for about 20 minutes
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: and just cried. It just hurt. It just broke my heart.
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: You know, you can't help but think about your own kids. And,
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: you know, that's where we've got people who've got to
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: come to this broken place where they know that it's
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: a real person that that's happening to. And I remember
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: just throwing my hands up in the air. You know,
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: it's one thing to have a house for girls. How
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: are we going to make this happen?
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: How are we going to take care of young men?
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and so it went back to you can't eat
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: the elephant all at one time. You've got to have
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: that strategic plan. You've got to make choices because that
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: was like in 2017 or 18. I would have loved
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: to have started that we weren't ready for it. I
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: knew that we weren't, but that's where God placed it,
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: that you are going to have to do something.
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: And then he sent me Kim, who said, oh.
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: We can do that. He started that fire for you.
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: He started that little fire.
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: We've got to do something about this.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: And so there are boys out there who survive the
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: unthinkable and have no place to go, y'all. And Blanket
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: Fort Hope intends that. we are going to be that
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: place because every child is a image bearer of the Lord.
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: Every child deserves restoration. Every child deserves that. And that's
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: where we as Christians, especially have to remember that child.
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: He is a reflection of Jesus as you and I are.
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: And it's our job. We want to, we just can't close.
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: Our eyes anymore.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: We've got to start the conversation. Um, Jesus did not
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: say some of the oppressed, did he?
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: He did not.
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: He did not say the female prisoners. He said the oppressed.
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: He said the prisoners, all of them. That is the
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: mandate that we are operating under at Blanket Fort Hope
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: is the oppressed.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: We're not picking and choosing. It's the oppressed. That's what
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: God has called us to. And our state's got to
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: step up. Our advocacy has got to step up. Our
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: conversations have got to step up. And it's okay. We're
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: starting here. It's okay to start here.
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: And to break that silence.
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: And to be ready, open to having the conversation. And
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: this is where we start.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: So, Kim, what do you think that restoration actually looks
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: like for a male survivor?
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: I think we have to know that and acknowledge that.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: that their barriers to care and receiving care is a
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: little bit different than young ladies. I think society places,
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: you know, there's this stigma about being a man and
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: having someone else take advantage of you that I think
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: is a little bit different for young men. And their
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: barriers are not smaller or bigger. They're just a little
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: bit different. And like I was saying, they are conditioned.
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: That's so good. From just being a little child, you know,
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: a little boy.
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: Don't cry.
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: Don't cry.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: Buckle up, buttercup.
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: Don't be weak. Yeah. Don't let anybody take advantage of you.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: You know? And so if it happens, they look at
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: it as if it's my fault and I have failed.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: There you go.
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: I've contributed to this and it's my fault.
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: They're... Yes.
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: They blame themselves. They blame themselves. And the level of
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: shame is unimaginable.
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: And they would rather... not say anything, especially when it's
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: not being acknowledged to start with. Amen. Why would they?
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: Why would they? And so trauma-informed care for these male
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: survivors requires that we meet their beliefs head on and
• 25:06
  Speaker 2: we talk about it and we acknowledge it and we
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: build programs and awareness and messages that call them forth.
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: Do you think in the trauma healing process with all
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: the things in your lifetime that you've learned, do you
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: think that the trauma-informed care will be the same except
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: for the conversation? Or do you think it has to
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: look different for a boy versus a female child?
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: I think it will look different and it will be individualized.
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: It will be that same approach of learning that young man.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: And what they've been told and what they believe and
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: how they see themselves. And sadly enough, we talk about
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: this occasionally. Sometimes the word of God is used in
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: their abuse. Thank you for bringing that up. And that's
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: another story, another topic. But even with that, we have
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: to be mindful about how we begin our care. Because
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: sometimes they've been told. Well, God told me to do
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: this or they've taken the word of God and they've
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: twisted it.
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: Kim, that's so important.
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: And so we have to just be we have to
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: learn every single child and approach them in a way
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: that the services that we provide meets their unique needs.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: And I think that's a really key point for people
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: to hear is that there's so much manipulation. Yes. With
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: these children. Because people are like, why do they come
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: to you and run away? Why do they want to
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: keep living that way? There's fear. There's drugs that have
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: been given to them. There may be the ability that
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: they can't have kids anymore. They think that they're worthless.
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: And then even to take it a step further, Kim,
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: is such an eye-opening thing that you said. It just
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: penetrates down the depth of my body that people even
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: use the word of God.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: We see that frequently.
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: And how do you think they use it? What do
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: you think? They say things like, God told me that.
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: You're... Yes. And if you don't comply, you're going to hell.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: I mean, they take the word of God and they
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: twist it. Yes. And they leave children believing that God
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: is someone who doesn't love them. And Jesus loves all
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: the children of the world. Exactly.
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: Red and yellow, black and white. Exactly.
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: Boys and girls. And so the work is about and
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: will sometime take years of undoing messages and manipulation that
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: these children have heard. Years of working through trauma that
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: they have endured. And a lot of identity work about
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: who God said you are.
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: And I think you said it earlier in another podcast,
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: nobody else gets to tell you what God has for you.
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: They don't.
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: That's right. And so you keep going and you keep
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: working and you keep finding out, who did God create
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: me to be? So it gets them on track with
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: figuring out, who am I? Because through the experiences they've had,
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: they're so confused sometimes about their own identity. And sometimes
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: they're confused as to whether or not they're even worth
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: you know, someone caring or wanting to work with them.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: And so it's so internalized. And a lot of times
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: they see themselves as weak.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: So sad.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: And so the very first work that we're going to
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: be doing is showing them that When God created him
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: or her, he said that they're good.
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: And that they are worthwhile. Yes. And they have a
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: God-given purpose.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: Amen. And we just keep on repetitively reiterating because God's
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: word doesn't come out void, remember?
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: Isn't that wonderful? Amen.
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: That's so wonderful to me.
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: We know that it will accomplish what he set it
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: out for.
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. You know, this is not just healing. The
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: goal is identity, like you talked about, helping a young
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: man understand exactly who he is in Jesus. And that's
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: a powerful thing when you tell a young man who's
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: been exploited that God does see him and he loves him.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: And God does not treat you the way the world
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: treats you.
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: And that he is known and he is loved. and
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: the truth. And when it finally lands, it can be
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: the beginning of everything. And we want you all to
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: be a part of that change. It may be going
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: on the state and having conversations. It may be in
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: your neighborhood. It may be a lunch and learn. It
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: may be a coffee.
• 29:54
  Speaker 2: It's you.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: You don't have to be out there rescuing or out
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: there starting a home.
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: You just need to start that conversation. Eight episodes ago,
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: I asked a question. And I said, do you remember
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: building a blanket fort as a kid? It's a place
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: of safety. It's a place of imagination. And I talked about,
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: you know, you plant a flag. I think about dances
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: with wolves. I know that's crazy. Where you planted that
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: flag outside the fort. And it was guarded.
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: You didn't come in the fort.
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: You'd be shot if you came in the fort. Yes.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: And I really see our blanket Fort Hope.
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: As a fort. We've planted that flag.
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: Don't come near it. That's right.
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: And God has got an angel that is big as
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: the state of Alabama over that property. And I want
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: them to say, I'm here. I am safe.
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: You cannot get to me in here.
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: In here.
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: Because I'm safe in my blanket fort.
• 30:47
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: And. I want to ask another question, Kim.
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: Go ahead.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: I'm going to ask it. Who is still outside our fort?
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: Are you outside our fort? Are you going to be
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: inside our fort and help us fight? And it's just
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: a matter of people coming together and fighting and using
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: their voices. We built this organization for girls who had
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: no place to land. And we'll always be here for them.
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: That is what the property is about.
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: You know, I'm not going to limit God and say
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: that we will never have more property. But these homes
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: that we built in the past. So I do want
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: people to understand that we have an actual team that
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: oversees those.
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: There are social workers who recruit, train, and do all
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: the things for these homes that Blanket Fort Hope does.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: But the fort's bigger than we thought. It always is,
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: isn't it?
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: Yes. God's dreams are always bigger. God sounds always bigger
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: than we are.
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: We talk about this imagination. I wake up in the
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: middle of the night sometimes going, uh-oh.
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: Always bigger. Oh, no.
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: And the God who places assignment in our hearts, he
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: already knew about the boys.
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: That's right. He already knew.
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: And you know what I love? about your past and
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: what you're wanting. You were already working with both of those.
• 32:14
  Speaker 2: Yes, boys and girls.
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: Yes, those demographics. And those demographics were all over the place.
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: And so he was preparing you, and you didn't even know.
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: I didn't even know it. I didn't even know it.
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: And when I met you and God, I didn't even
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: know all the things about you that he had already
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: placed in your heart and the things that you knew.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: You already knew how to work with boys. We didn't
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: have to reinvent that wheel.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: God already had already prepared. It was always a part
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: of his plan. Always. We didn't know it at the time,
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: but it was always a part of his plan.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: I mean, I wonder what we'd been like if we'd
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: been childhood friends playing in the sandbox together.
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: Oh, boy.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: Can you imagine?
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: Good times.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: So we're going to close this session of Unsilenced, and
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: I want to leave you with this, that the work
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: is not finished. The story is not over. And if
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: you're listening to this, You are a part of what's
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: going to come next.
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: We just want to say to our Christ-centered community and
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: to everyone that's been following this journey that Blanket Fort Hope,
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: stepping into care for boys, is not an expansion of strategy.
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: We see this as a calling. To the churches, to
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: the donors, the partners listening right now, we are celebrating
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: with you as well. This is your moment too. Yes.
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: The boys are waiting and we cannot do this without you.
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: And we want to speak directly to boys, to young
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: men who may be listening, the ones who aren't as well.
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: But you will find this episode one day. You are
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: not forgotten. You are not invisible, not to God and
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: not to us. What may have happened to you is
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: not your fault. You did not deserve it.
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: You are not too broken or you're not too far gone.
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: You are a child who needs protection. Our world has
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: failed you. And we're sorry about that. Yes. But there
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: is now a door that God has opened. Blanket Fort
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: Hope was built for you too. And we will be
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: here when you're ready to walk through it. Here's what
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: I'm asking you to do. Please, please, please share this episode.
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: This is so near and dear to us. Just with
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: one person, your.
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: Pastor, a social worker, a donor, a business, a parent,
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: anyone who needs to know that boys are survivors too.
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: And that there's now a place in Alabama ready to
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: receive them. There's somebody out there that knows somebody. And
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: the more people that we can get this information out to,
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: the more your circles, they grow and the more kids
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: are able to help and pray. Pray specifically for the boys,
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: the ones we have not met yet, the ones who
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: are waiting for these doors to be open for them,
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: they're waiting to be rescued. We pray, Kim and I
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: pray all the time that the kids out on the street,
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: that God will give them visions and dreams of who
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: he is and that help is coming. We feel so
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: deeply and know God's truth, and we know that he's
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: preparing and has prepared a place for them because they've
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: been in front of their enemies, but now he's bringing
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: them home because the foundation, Kim, is Christ. Amen. It's Christ.
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: The mission is always going to be hope, and, y'all,
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: the best is yet to come. We know it. We
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: believe it. We're going to keep diving into it. We're
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: going to keep pilfering out. That's right. I am Alexa James.
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: And I'm Kim Meshago.
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: And this is Unsilenced, the voices that trafficking try to erase.
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: Our season right now is complete. We look forward to
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: the next one.
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: But we're just getting started. Amen.
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: Amen.
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: We'll see you in the next episode.
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: If you or someone you know needs help, call or
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: text the National Human Trafficking Hotline at 1-888-373-7888. Available 24
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: hours a day, 7 days a week. To learn more
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: about Blanket Fort Hope, visit BlanketForthHope.org. Together we can make
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: sure no voice goes unheard.