Latest / Create The Best Me / Coping with Pet Loss: Comfort & Healing Tips
Transcript
- 0:05This episode is very different from my normal content, but I feel like I might not be the only one who may be going through this kind of loss, or perhaps you might have been through this and understand my pain and maybe this loss that I'm going through right now hit me harder because this month, the month of March is the anniversary of my father's death.
- 0:29My father passed away March 4th, 2019, a day after his 72nd birthday.
- 0:37So my father's birthday was just a few days ago, March 3rd, and on March 3rd my daughter's dog and best friend Foxy passed away.
- 0:47Foxy was born on September 29th, 2012.
- 0:51That's exactly three months before Jasmine's birthday.
- 0:55The bond these two had was one that would make your heart melt.
- 1:00I think Foxy knew when the first time she saw my youngest daughter, Jasmine, that this was going to be an amazing friendship.
- 1:09Jasmine does have two older siblings, but one lives in another state and her brother lives an hour away.
- 1:15So growing up with Foxy is as close as Jasmine has come to having a sibling in the house.
- 1:23I think to in today's world, we don't see our pets as pets or as some organizations might refer to them as property.
- 1:30These amazing pets are family members.
- 1:34They may not speak to us in a language that is understandable, but if you've had your pet long enough, you've established ways to understand each other.
- 1:44When you don't feel well or you're frustrated with the world, our amazing pets have an a way of helping us feel better to see the world from a different perspective.
- 1:55And as I always tell my youngest daughter, a dog will always be there for you, even when it's owner is not the best dog owner.
- 2:05Dogs have this unconditional love deep inside them.
- 2:09They're always looking for ways to make your life better and make you feel better.
- 2:15Heck, you can accidentally step on your dog's paw, kick them, yet they have this amazing way of forgiving you and always coming back to make sure you're okay.
- 2:28Foxy had always been a sickly dog who would go through days when she would not eat, and then after several days she'd begin eating again.
- 2:38A few years back we took her to the vet and discussed Foxy's eating situation had been an ongoing thing since she was a puppy, and while you could hear her tummy grumble, there was nothing we could do to make this dog eat.
- 2:51The vet recommended removing seven teeth.
- 2:54She felt Foxy's bad teeth were the root cause of her eating issues.
- 2:59So several thousands of dollars later, Foxy continued to have eating issues.
- 3:05Nothing changed except she was missing seven teeth.
- 3:09About two months ago my husband and I noticed Foxy was acting like an old dog.
- 3:14Both her parents live with us in the home and they don't act like old dogs.
- 3:19Why is Foxy acting old?
- 3:21We just let Foxy be Foxy.
- 3:23Foxy's mom CoCo is the first dog I've ever owned, and she's still alive.
- 3:29So when Foxy passed away, I had no idea what to do or who to call, let alone try to comfort my 12-year-old daughter who lost her best friend and was insistent on going to school.
- 3:42In fact, it didn't hit me until I sent my daughter off to school, and I gave my dogs their treats, that morning.
- 3:51I accidentally grabbed three treats and put one back.
- 3:54Then I looked at the two dogs, CoCo and Teddy.
- 3:58I usually give Foxy her treat first because she looks so cute when she stands up and walks in her hind legs.
- 4:05I always tell Teddy Foxy first and Foxy wasn't there.
- 4:10That's when I realized she was gone and I had no idea what to do.
- 4:16If you've ever been in that situation, or perhaps maybe someday you're in this situation, let me start off by saying, take a breath, because losing a fur child is painful.
- 4:27They're not property, they're family.
- 4:31Secondly, decide if you're going to cremate your pet or bury.
- 4:35In my situation, I knew I had to make a decision really fast because when my daughter returned from school, she would want to know what is going to happen to Foxy.
- 4:46Because Foxy died in her crate and her bowels began to release, I knew I needed to call a service to help me.
- 4:54I knew burying Foxy at a pet cemetery wouldn't be something Jasmine was comfortable with because we'd have to drive out to the cemetery so she could visit Foxy.
- 5:03So I chose to cremate Foxy.
- 5:05I contacted a local service.
- 5:07They came out to my home, carefully, pulled Foxy out of the crate, allowed me to look at her one last time, as they carefully placed her in the van and transported her.
- 5:19The transporter informed me that, they would contact me within eight to 10 business days to arrange dropping off her remains in a pine box.
- 5:28When Jasmine got home from school, she asked her father if he had tossed Foxy in the garbage.
- 5:34Her dad informed her that I arranged to have Foxy cremated and she would be home within a couple of weeks.
- 5:40Jasmine walked into my office and thanked me for caring for her best friend and cannot wait, for her remains to return home to us.
- 5:49It was during that time that I knew I needed to stop what I was doing, and even though I didn't feel like I was emotionally ready to talk about Foxy's death, I knew Jasmine needed it.
- 6:02We talked about what an amazing dog Foxy was and how she used to greet Jasmine at the bottom of the stairs every morning and at the garage door when she arrived home from school.
- 6:15Jasmine told me it didn't feel right to have Foxy not greet her that day when she returned from school.
- 6:22We talked about how Foxy is in a better place because she's no longer suffering from stomach issues she had been dealing with for over 12 years of her life.
- 6:32We talked about how she was the best friend Jasmine could ever have had, even though she's no longer here, the photos, the videos, the memories, and that unconditional love will always live in our hearts.
- 6:49Then I told Jasmine that Grandpa Garcia, my father received the best gift ever, he got Foxy Jasmine's best friend and dog, to keep him company in heaven.
- 7:03Foxy took with her the love you gave her, I'm talking to Jasmine and is sharing that love with grandpa.
- 7:13We both cried, but felt that the tears Jasmine and I shared were tears of sadness, but also happy tears knowing Foxy is hanging out with my father.
- 7:24I feel confident that taking the time to talk with a loved one who is also feeling that same, feeling of loss due to losing a pet is very important because it helps both people to honor and share what that amazing fur family member meant and how she made our lives better with her unconditional love.
- 7:48If you were caring for a sick pet, or your pet suddenly dies and you don't know what to do or you don't know where to start, contact your local veterinarian as they can give you names of services that can help you with options that feel right for you and your family.
- 8:07Again, I know this week's episode is different, but I thought I'd share something our family is currently going through.
- 8:15I hope you enjoyed this episode.
- 8:17It has been very difficult for me to talk about this one.
- 8:22If you'd like additional information or resources, or you just wanna see more pictures of Foxy, you can find them at createthebestme.com/ep106.
- 8:36And if you're like me dealing with common symptoms that come with perimenopause, menopause, or postmenopause, you have to come back next week as our guest will be Carin Luna-Ostaseki.
- 8:49Who is the founder of Hot or Just Me?
- 8:53She will be here to discuss all the amazing products and tools she's gathered to make your menopause journey more manageable.
- 9:01So you'll have to come back next week.
- 9:04Thank you for joining me during this emotional episode.
- 9:07Catch you next week.
- 9:08Bye for now.
- 9:12You are more than just a pet.
- 9:17You are family.
- 9:20Your love, loyalty, and joy will never be forgotten.
- 9:32Run free, sweet, Foxy.