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Transcript

Living Into The Freedom Of Forgiveness. · Choosing Jesus

• 0:09
  Christina: I keep choosing Jesus. Hi friends, and welcome back to the Choosing Jesus podcast. I am Christina Wampler, and I am delighted to be here with you today. We are gonna talk about so much today, but we dive into Psalm 40. What does it mean to delight to do the Lord's will?
• 0:32
  We're also gonna talk a lot about forgiveness, which is a very big one. We get to walk in forgiveness in Jesus. And so what does that look like? And what does it mean to really believe that our sins that He says were as red as scarlet are washed white as snow. We are forgiven.
• 0:48
  And we're also going to talk about the impact you have, which is again, a lot of topics going on here, but I really think that this is a very specific episode that I'm so excited about. So you have an impact. The Lord has placed you and planted you very, very specifically. And I don't want the enemy to diminish the impact you have. And I don't think the Lord does either.
• 1:07
  So how do we enter into that? So the question we are pondering and sitting with considering as we head into this episode today is, are you living forgiven? Do you believe you are forgiven? I hope the Lord continues to meet you in that, in this moment, in this episode and beyond. So let's enter in.
• 1:25
  I want to encourage the person that feels like they don't have eyes on them. And what I mean by that is I feel like there's just times where the enemy can make you think you don't have an impact. Whether you're a stay at home mom with one kid and you're like, nobody even sees my life. Like I'm trying to live for Jesus, but my two year old is the only one who sees me and I can't. Like I fall short and I da da da.
• 1:46
  Or you don't have kids, you're single. You're like, nobody sees me really live it day to day. Like I say, I follow the Lord, I'm walking it out, but like no one really sees it. I think that that's just something that the enemy wants us to believe because whether you know it or not, people are watching, people are looking. And there have been times in my life where it feels like nobody's watching and nobody's going to take notice if I choose to open the word that day for a while or if I don't, or if I make a good decision on how I respond to something or I don't or I act out of reaction.
• 2:18
  There are just things that really will not be seen. The Lord obviously sees it all and like is rooting us on to choose the way of life. But we can think that nobody is paying attention. Nobody sees us. Nobody cares.
• 2:30
  Nobody's taking notes. And then there are times where I am a teacher, so I have hundreds of little eyes on me every week. And I am quite aware that what I say or do can and will be used against me. No, I'm just kidding. But I have to be really careful and it's quite humbling because I fall short quite often because I'm a human.
• 2:49
  So how I handle it, how I handle things matters. And there have been times where I'm in this and there have been times where I feel like nobody would notice whether I chose the right thing or the wrong thing. It is just as important. Obedience is just as important when nobody can see as when everyone can see. And so don't discount your call and your impact.
• 3:10
  I also will say, I think there's such an impact in, I didn't start teaching TEL. Like I didn't feel like I had a lot of eyes sound silly, but like a lot of, I mean, quite literally if I have a 100 students, that's 200 little eyes looking at me. So there are a lot of eyes, but I lived many years of like a quieter and I still feel like I've been in a quiet time, frankly, although I've been teaching, I just feel like very reserved and private, but maybe I don't come across that way. I don't know. One weird thing about being any sort of like, I don't know how I come across, but that's okay.
• 3:41
  So anyway, I feel like it's been quieter. Like I'm kind of just like doing my thing. Occasionally I'll post something about it, whatever, whatever. And it's sweet because I see that those posts have impact, but I'm like, it's kind of just what I wanna share if I wanna share. But when it comes to teaching, it's like much more humbling because there are moments where I'd rather not share, but it's already happened.
• 3:59
  I've already said it in front of this whole class and now I'm living with a little bit of regret and gonna receive a lot of the Lord's grace. But there are just times where you outwardly know that you're being more observed or watched or imprinting, but all of it is impactful. But the obedience that I had for years where nobody saw versus the obedience that is a little bit more front facing or outward, it doesn't matter. It's still obedience. And like I was reading Psalm 40, I guess I'll go to that where it just talks about David being like, I delight to do your will, oh my Lord.
• 4:30
  And we should delight to do His will and walk in that obedience, have obedient hearts whether everyone's seeing it or no one's seeing it because no one is ever not seeing it. The Lord is seeing it. So, which is all we ever should be caring about anyway, is obviously we wanna honor Him. But I think the coolest part is like, if I delight and desire to do the Lord's will and I desire to walk in obedience, obedience always gonna look like honoring and loving people. Choosing to serve, choosing to respond instead of react, choosing to...
• 4:56
  Whatever it is, His Holy Spirit is gonna help me make those decisions if I'm in actual obedience and obviously we're human. So there's grace for that. But desiring and delighting to do His will is such a beautiful goal and expression. So like, you David for writing that out in Psalm 40. But if you don't have to be, I mean, we're stumbling all the time.
• 5:19
  We're repenting all the time. Right? But if you... There's always purpose. There's...
• 5:24
  The Lord has wasted no part of your story. No part of your story. Okay. No part of your story. And so if you're like, yeah, literally nobody knows the wrestles I had with the Lord.
• 5:34
  Like when I didn't know how to honor Him in these situations and I did it quietly and kind of suffered silently, the Lord sought you. Or I wanted to honor this person and I literally tried and missed the mark and that caused pain. But I was trying and I was seeking the Lord and it wasn't received the way I thought it would be or whatever it is. Like there is grace, but the Lord saw your effort. And that's the thing like we get to go to bed.
• 5:57
  I mean, I'm not saying like you will have perfect sleep, but God does give sleep to those He loves. But are times where people just have really hard sleep and or like bad dreams. So I'm not saying for sure, it's not a guarantee, but the Lord gives sleep to those who love. And we can go to sleep with a clear conscience if we are seeking the Lord, we're repenting, we're coming to Him and we are, yeah. I'm like, I'm a good sleeper anyway.
• 6:18
  So this isn't really fair, but sometimes I'm just like, girl, I go to bed with a clear conscience. That's how I sleep well because... And Lord, this is not a test. Please don't give me bad sleep. But it's important to, and that's why I talked about this before, but like I do repent right before bed because I'm like, Lord, I just wanna like lay it all at your feet.
• 6:32
  Like I just wanna restart again in the morning. I wanna begin again. And so I lay this at your feet before I go to bed and I repent and I resurrender my life to you. And I admit and acknowledge the ways that I know that I fell short today. But you can have a clear...
• 6:48
  Like even if someone doesn't receive, I think it's hard for us sometimes because we're like, I tried, I mean, gosh, I don't know which... If I could mother Teresa, someone said like, basically if you want to give, give to the ungrateful poor. Give to someone ungrateful because that's how you know your heart will be doing the right thing, not for a reaction, not for a response because we feel good inherently. If I go and I love and serve somebody, even in my family or like whatever, you love and serve. And they're like, thank you so much.
• 7:17
  Oh my gosh, Crick, you're so servant hearted. Love you. I can say I was just giving to be servant hearted. But in reality, I am getting back praise of... Or Thanksgiving in a way that, I mean, it does like make me feel good kinda.
• 7:29
  And that's not necessarily a sin, that's not bad inherently, but it's like, you don't know why you're doing it as much. And so I think it was Mother Teresa, I don't know, someone wise, just talks about giving when nothing's gonna be. And that's scriptural, like Jesus is like invite people to the banquet. They can't pay you back. That will never invite you over to their house because they don't even have a house.
• 7:47
  So you're inviting them in and you're... And obviously just because someone doesn't have stuff to give doesn't mean they're ungrateful, but... Or anything about their character necessarily, but like giving to people where... Or like, I think it's really beautiful to give anonymously or give... That's not even what I'm...
• 8:04
  I mean, yes. But giving in a way that like you won't even see them receive because it really is about the giving at that point, the obedience of that and not about response or reaction. Because we can toe a line if we're doing things just to get a specific response or reaction from people. And again, it's not inherently bad to give a gift or give something generously and be delighted when someone receives it well. But it's the same thing with good things or bad things or hard things when we're going to say something where it's like, okay, I'm going to say this thing.
• 8:36
  I've done that before. Right? I enter into a conversation. I'm like, I'm gonna say this. And they're gonna be so grateful that I chose the high road that they'll say this or they'll be grateful or this will mend this relationship.
• 8:45
  It's like, that is not always the case. We do not know how people are gonna respond or react. We do not know how people are going to. Like, I need to do what I feel obedient doing that is most honoring to this person in the Lord regardless of reaction. Even if their reaction is way south.
• 8:58
  And I think that's what's cool about partnering with the Lord. Also it's... It may be prideful to assume you know the best reaction anyway, but if I've partnered with the Lord and I go go strongly, okay, Lord, I've sat with you in prayer. I feel like you're asking me to say this thing and do this thing. It's actually so freeing to then get to enter a conversation, know where you stand, know why you stand there and deliver and not be at the mercy of this person's reaction or emotions because God can be your stable rock at that time and the rock upon which you lean when you're like, what the heck is this response or reaction right now?
• 9:36
  Which is really cool. But all that to say, I finally made my way to Psalm 40. Let's go to... It's verse eight that says, I delight to do your will, oh my God, your law is within my heart. And that's the thing.
• 9:51
  We gotta have scripture on and in our heart and mind. We need to be washed by the scriptures to continue to know the heart of Christ, which is such a gift. And I also... This is the most silly like prompt that I'd written down, but I put cross train in the spirit. Okay.
• 10:08
  Let me explain. I think we can beat ourselves up when people commune with the Lord differently than we do. And we don't connect with the Lord as much that way. Like I could be like, I love scripture so much. And someone else could be like, oh gosh, like I can't just sit and read scripture like she can.
• 10:27
  Like, I need to listen to it. Like, that's actually how I connect. Wonderful. Do that. Or like, was talking about this earlier, but like there are so many scriptures that I read and I'm like, oh, that's in a song that I love, a worship song that's like so seeped in scripture.
• 10:41
  Like I wanna go listen to that worship song now that is very, very biblically sound. Or there are so many, oh my gosh, don't get me started on the songs that are quite literally just scripture. They're so beautiful. And there are different ways that that shows up. Like there are different artists that I love and different things, but just listening to direct only scripture.
• 10:59
  Like there is a wonderful song by... That's called Psalm 40. Oh my gosh. I'm gonna have to note who it is by. But it's literally just the Psalm being sung.
• 11:09
  And it's so beautiful. It's got me through a lot, but you might, it's cross training in the spirit. I don't know why that's the analogy coming to my mind, but that's why I love reading books that are theology super seeped in scripture, but not, it's not just scripture because it helps me unpack the scriptures a little bit more. Study Bibles, go for it. Commentaries, go for it.
• 11:28
  Songs, go for it. Like, I think it's so important to not beat ourselves up about how we connect with the Lord. And I think I say cross train because I'm like, that's, I mean, it's the wisest thing to do when working out a lot of times it's like, if you're a runner, okay, go swim because it's different muscles. It's really important to keep those. It's gonna help you stay healthy and fit and ready for anything if you cross train.
• 11:48
  So I think it's so important to have His law written on our heart, His word in our minds and hearts, but that can look different ways. So have grace for that. And sometimes your prayer is gonna look one way. Sometimes it's gonna look another way. Like, I think we need to, I think so I'm very much a creature of discipline and habit and rhythm.
• 12:04
  I was a ballet dancer. Like that's our jam. But sometimes I can get hung up and be I'm stale. Like, I literally don't feel vibrant in this, which is okay. It doesn't...
• 12:13
  Sometimes that means press in. But sometimes it's like, no, have grace and go like, listen, soak in worship music. Like just have it play and let it wash over you this truth. Like you don't have to do it this one way. But when it comes to having law written on our hearts, I remember when I first I posted, which I don't don't post it to...
• 12:32
  I mean, actually don't know. It's so weird. You can never know how you're being perceived. I feel like I don't post that much, but I do love posting about the Lord. It's like all I care about.
• 12:39
  So it's kind of all I post. But I also love my students. I posted about them before. But I remember posting when I'd read this Bible for the first time and I was like, read it cover to cover, like so sweet. Was just like, it was truly because I was like, wow, Lord, you're so kind to pull me through this.
• 12:58
  Like I've read this thing now. Like I am proud, I'm just delighted. Like I can never describe like how kind the Lord is to meet us in every single page. Like I cannot encourage you enough to pick up the word, whether for, I think it's a, I said this in that caption, like for the first time or the first time in a long time, like He is ready to meet you. He is begging to meet you.
• 13:14
  I'm so excited for you. But, I remember some people were like, oh my gosh, like that's so cool. You did a Bible in a year. Like I'm so inspired. And I was like, who said a year?
• 13:24
  Who said in a year? I didn't do it in a year. Like there are wonderful Bible reading plans in a year, but that was not my story. That was not how I read the Bible. I just read the word as I could, when I could.
• 13:35
  And I'm so grateful to have had read this Bible cover to cover. And I do plan to read it in different translations in different ways. All my days just read it chronologically in a different translation. I'm like, okay, the chronological was a whole different ball game. You gotta like jump around a lot more and it's really cool.
• 13:48
  And now I'm reading a different way. So it's really, really cool, but there's no right way to do it. There's no right timeline. Don't let people shame you, but all this to say, however we commune with the Lord, whatever it takes to get the law written in our hearts, which a lot of times is good conversation. I just love having conversation with people where I'm like, what is the Lord teaching you?
• 14:06
  Oh my gosh. That's like my favorite question. What is the Lord teaching you? Like what scriptures does He have you in right now? Like what themes is He revealing to you right now?
• 14:15
  And it's so cool. And I'm so encouraged when people just are like, oh, I've been in this scripture and this is what He's speaking. And I'm like, there are so many scriptures. This book is so rich. He could just meet us in so many things.
• 14:24
  And He constantly does. And it's so cool how it's just like calling, just like anything. He's meeting each person so individually. It is also cool when you see like church wide or like capital C Church, like church wide themes, like amen. But he is so intentional and individual.
• 14:41
  But oh my gosh, I just love Psalm 40. You should go read it. But, he is so intentional, but we should not be comparing how we relate to the Lord. But I think it's also really cool to talk about because sometimes people feel shame about like, I haven't been in the word or I haven't whatever. And we don't talk about it then.
• 14:58
  And we don't really like ask what people are doing. Do not let... There's no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. There is no shame. Like those who look to Him are radiant.
• 15:06
  Their faces are never covered with shame. And so don't let there be shame around feeling stale or not knowing what scripture to go look at or not knowing whatever. Or like, I even think of songs in general. Like some people have conviction around songs they listen to, some people don't. But also some people like, you might just not know great...
• 15:22
  Like I have a... Like I'm growing in my workout worship and I have found some good Christian rap that I like. And I'm like, this is awesome. I know this existed. Thanks for the people that shared it, which this is a PSA as a dance teacher and whatever, please send me music that you love.
• 15:36
  I would love to listen. I might choreograph to it. I just love worship. So that's a side note, but finding good music, like you might not know like, Hey, can you send me a playlist? Like, I don't really know what songs to listen to.
• 15:44
  I wanna get saturated in the scriptures. There are playlists that are just verses in songs that are wonderful. So all that to say, we're not comparing that. We don't wanna be comparing it all. But we also don't wanna compare our...
• 15:58
  I don't wanna say audiences, but yeah, like don't compare the fact that you have a few little kids that you're raising, that those are the eyes that are on you or you nanny someone, where those are the eyes that are on you versus someone who has a bigger obvious audience. Like no people are watching. And what matters is consistency. What matters is over time people watch. And I think honestly there've been multiple things in my life.
• 16:23
  Some have gone well, some have not, where I've been like, time will tell. And some of those have been really hard to walk through. And some of them I'm like, wow, time kinda did tell. Like I just continue to choose the Lord on that one and I've seen fruit of that. And like, thank you Lord, because you helped me choose you every day in that area and that has brought fruit.
• 16:40
  And like, it really mattered that I kept choosing that day in and day out. And then there are things where I thought time would tell and then time did tell, but it didn't tell in the way I wanted and it was really humbling, but I digress on that one. Yes. So we're not comparing how we receive the word, or truth or how we get the law written on our hearts. Like the Lord is intimately seeking for you to have the law written within your heart.
• 17:06
  I'm so excited for how He's gonna meet you in that. And when when it comes to our call, I guess this is like almost two different thoughts, but when He comes to our call, like we're not comparing to the person next to us. We're not comparing to the outreach we see this other person having. It is what is the Lord asked me to be faithful with today? And that can look so hilarious.
• 17:27
  Like I really, I don't know why I'm like on this analogy of this mom with a kid or two. Maybe it's because I see my sister doing it, but it's like literally obedience to the Lord today might be taking the time to cut your child's peanut butter and jelly in the very intentional way they love it. Like that might be your faithfulness today and someone else's might be preaching to thousands. Like that is still the same amount of obedience. God is proud in the same way.
• 17:52
  Like he is not, he's just not disappointed. I don't know why I just feel like that's what needs to be said. Like the the Lord is not disappointed in you and you doing your best in trying to seek Him amidst the circumstances. And He's not disappointed when you make mistakes. I, oh my goodness.
• 18:08
  I don't remember. I think this was in a book Into the Silent Land by... My gosh, it was so phenomenal. I think it was in that book. If it wasn't, that's wild.
• 18:18
  I'm trying to think of the author off the top of my head. Gosh, I read this like seven months ago. I don't know how it's coming back to me right now. Praise the Lord. But in it, it was this analogy of a person seeking forgiveness and they were seeking it with the Lord.
• 18:35
  And then they brought it up to this person and they were like, can you tell me when the Lord like, if the Lord forgives me of this thing? I think it was something like that. And the girl came back, the person came back and was like, the Lord says, like, I don't even remember what you're talking about. Gosh, I'm really botching how this should be said right now. But essentially because it was repented of and forgiveness was given, like the Lord does not recall.
• 19:00
  Like He washes us clean white as snow. And obviously there are occasional things in life that happen that there are repercussions with people that we have to address further than just repenting to the Lord and, to honor Him and others best. Like we might have to do things more than just be in prayer and repent and receive forgiveness from the Lord. But that is where it starts. And a lot of times that's where it ends.
• 19:19
  I think we can like freak ourselves out or hype ourselves up that we'll have to do, so much to repair, but like really the Lord is the one that repairs. The Lord is the one that restores. The Lord is the one that redeems. The Lord is the one that washes us and sees Christ's righteousness upon us. That is the whole point as to why Jesus Christ came, walked the earth as a perfect human and then died as the sacrificial lamb for our sins and shed blood for us.
• 19:52
  That's like, it's our blood up there. It's... The blood is on our hands because we're the sinners, but He did that. And now Christ, now Jesus sees... Sorry.
• 20:01
  Now God, the Father sees Jesus as us. When He looks at us, He sees Jesus. He sees Jesus' level of righteousness. And we gotta believe that we gotta live into that to receive the freedom that comes with that. It has never been up to my works.
• 20:16
  It doesn't matter if I'm in my word every single day. I cannot on my own merit earn God being proud of me. I cannot earn God loving me. I cannot earn God's forgiveness. Like He gives it by His grace, by His mercy.
• 20:30
  So we just get to enter in. We just get to bring it to the Lord once again, just be like, Lord, I'm so sorry. So He has forgotten. He's washed us white as snow, and He has just washed our past. And that's just as important on the day you first decide to follow Him as it is every single day after that.
• 20:46
  It might feel more significant because maybe He's washing you of a lot more sins at one time, first time. But as we walk, He just keeps washing us. And so we just get to receive every single day that washing of, oh my gosh, I'm white as snow again. And honestly, I've needed that recently. Like I'll just go to bed and I'm like, I'm white as snow again.
• 21:04
  I made these mistakes, but I'm white as snow again. And like the Lord is not holding that against me. He's not keeping a record of your wrongs that you are forgiven. Like we need to walk in that fullness. And I think when we do, it helps us compare less.
• 21:18
  Hold on. Need water. It helps us compare less. But we also gotta forgive ourselves. And sometimes, people can hold on to that.
• 21:32
  But if a perfect God who created us, loves us, died for us, has forgiven us, who are we to withhold forgiveness from ourselves or from other people? And that is a painful lesson to learn sometimes. And it's very hard, but we don't really have... If Christ is our Lord, we don't really have the authority to forgive or not forgive. He deems us forgiven.
• 21:56
  Period. End of story. If Jesus Christ is Lord of my life, I am forgiven for the things I have repented of. I cannot... I don't have the right to trump Jesus and say, you forgave me, but I don't know.
• 22:12
  I don't know where I'm at with that. Y'all, is he Lord of your life? You are forgiven. Have you repented? You are forgiven.
• 22:20
  Have you said, I'm sorry, Lord? You are forgiven. So don't let yourself... And this might be the hardest part. If you are right with the Lord, if you have potentially apologized, let's say there's a third party involved.
• 22:32
  It really is like a relational issue. And you've now apologized to that person and they're not forgiving you, you're still forgiven. You are forgiven because Christ has forgiven you. You've attempted to right wrongs potentially. You don't have the authority to say you're not forgiven.
• 22:48
  They don't have the authority to say you're not forgiven because Christ has deemed you forgiven. And so we get to walk in the freedom of that forgiveness. We're not comparing... Yeah, we get to live in the freedom of not comparing calls. We are not comparing shame or past things.
• 23:06
  I never know how jumbled these are coming across because my brain's just all over the place. It's crazy to sit down and talk to yourself about the Lord like this. But we get to walk in freedom. And I just, sometimes I'm like, I don't even care. I don't even care if it's a little jumbled because if it potentially is speaking and loving and blessing one person to step into freedom, step into it, step into it.
• 23:27
  And I can't help it. I listen to podcasts when I'm on a walk. So, if you're listening to this on a walk, I just encourage you to stop. Stop for a second, breathe. Say, I am forgiven.
• 23:40
  I am forgiven. I'm forgiven. And if you need to take something to the Lord, you haven't taken Him yet. I encourage you to just take that to Him, but you are forgiven. And he is so excited to just begin again with you.
• 23:50
  So that is so exciting. And I think of walks where I have been listening to a podcast that encourages me enough that I've literally dropped down onto my knees in the middle of the walk because I have such a, God is so kind that I was like, I don't care that I'm on earth right now and that I'm in the middle of Santa Monica, California. I'm going to get on my knees and worship because God is wrecking me right now. And I literally don't care who sees me. Like, I do not care who sees me.
• 24:14
  And if they ask, I would say, I am experiencing the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. How are you today? Because His mercy is that good. His grace is that good. And we get to step in and receive it.
• 24:26
  And so that's another thing. Like if you're having a hard time receiving it, ask, Lord, I want to receive your forgiveness. Please help me feel that deep in my soul. I'm carrying this weight. Whether it's a weight in your shoulders, in your heart, in your chest.
• 24:38
  Oh my goodness. If you are carrying the weight throughout your whole body, you might be carrying attention you don't even know. You're like not aware that you're sleeping with your jaw super clenched. Like Lord, like help me receive your forgiveness, whatever this blockage is and pay attention. He might bring something up, something else that you need to let go of, something else that He wants to set you free from or bring up, so that you can have fullness of life.
• 24:57
  Again, if it is condemning or makes you feel shame, it's not from the Lord. He is a God of love, but He does desire to bring you into further freedom and relationship with Him with no hindrance in Jesus' name. So if He's bringing these things up, just feel free to take them to the Lord. And He is coming to you in love. And He's not here to shame you or condemn you.
• 25:17
  He just wants freedom for you. And there's freedom in His forgiveness. So enter in, which is so exciting. We get to enter in, which praise the Lord. So I truly don't know how my first starting thought of this podcast has brought me where it has brought me, but we're not here to compare calls.
• 25:37
  We're not here to compare impacts. We're here to walk in the freeness of freedom, of fullness, of forgiveness that Christ has given you, yes, you today. And let that wash over us. Let that wash over you. I encourage you to play some music, play some worship music, let truth wash over you, sit with it, journal.
• 25:56
  We just need to receive His love. We need to receive His freedom, His fullness. So I'm so excited for how Christ is gonna meet you. Jesus, God, Father, Abba, all of it, Holy Spirit is gonna meet you in the scriptures. It's gonna meet you through music.
• 26:11
  It's gonna meet you in new ways and old ways and guide you, give you discernment as you walk. Holy spirit will fill you and give you wisdom for certain circumstances, situations. And I just encourage us, I'm encouraging myself too, because it's hard to walk in obedience sometimes. And even when we delight to do His will, I'm not gonna lie, there happened times recently where I've been like, I don't wanna do your will Lord. I think your will is this thing.
• 26:35
  I like don't wanna do it in my flesh. And we gotta... I mean, I have to pray at that time. I'm like, Lord, I want to want what you want for me. I just don't actually want it.
• 26:44
  So please help. I want to want that thing. I want to want to not live in this way. I want to want to be obedient in this way. But sometimes it's just all we can bring is the want to want.
• 26:57
  Like we will be lying if we said, I want obedience in this Lord. I want to choose you. I mean, if I'm really honest, sometimes I have say, I want to want. I was talking about this with someone time one time, but I want to want Your way above my way. But my flesh is really strong right now, Lord, and this is what I want.
• 27:13
  But I want to want Your way above that. And sometimes that's all we can bring Him in. He will take it. He is so gracious to meet us where we're at. Any prayer, even screaming His prayer.
• 27:23
  Someone said that to me this week, even screaming at the Lord's prayer. And that sounds harsh, but like truly any communication, like there's nothing the Lord cannot handle of us. He already knows every single thought. Go read Psalm 139. The Lord knows our waking and our coming, sleeping and our going.
• 27:39
  He knows every thought, every word we're gonna say, every single day of our life is written in His book before one of them comes to be. He already knows our life. And yet He loves us enough to give us free will and choose as we will on that journey. He just already knows what it will look like, but praise the Lord for that. So please be encouraged in your call, in your impact.
• 28:02
  And I say this, it's not like our goal is to have an impact. Our goal is to just be faithful to Jesus Christ. But I'm just encouraging you that you're having an impact, how He sees fit with the people He's given you to impact. And so if that is a four year old toddler that you nanny, hallelujah. If that is kids you are raising in your own home, hallelujah.
• 28:23
  If that is you as a leader or teacher of some sort with eyes on you, hallelujah. If you're just a leader in leadership at your job and there are eyes on you, Hallelujah. Don't diminish the impact Christ wants to have through you. Let us be willing vessels. Let us say, yes, Lord.
• 28:42
  Let us say, okay, I'll try again. And don't get defeated. We can't get defeated. Right? Cause I think sometimes it's like, oh my gosh, I didn't do the best leadership choice on that.
• 28:52
  Like I lost all credibility. No, you haven't. The Lord will give you wisdom on how to move forward. Again, you might have to address it with a person you might not. But even as a teacher, I talk about it a lot.
• 29:02
  I'm like, Hey guys, could it have been better? And it's really humbling, but it's really important also what a gift that we can give people to watch us make mistakes and own up to them and like be human in front of them. Last thing my students need is a perfect teacher who never makes mistakes and is like, love Jesus. And like, yeah, but you're perfect. This is not what my students would think.
• 29:21
  Let me just put that out there. But that's not actually helping them. They need to see someone make mistakes. Obviously I hope to make mistakes that don't hurt them or like whatever, but like they're going to happen. It does happen.
• 29:32
  And watching them, letting them see me as a human. And I remember specifically repenting in front of some of my high school students at times over different things. And I'm like, actually that's really important. Like it was really humbling. My pits were sweating.
• 29:43
  I didn't wanna do But honestly, that's really important. That was really important that probably, Lord, I trust you. But like maybe that was what they needed was to see a teacher repent in front of him right now over X, Y, or Z. And so we don't know how the Lord's gonna use us. So yes.
• 29:59
  Or also I just wanna talk to like the person who's maybe a student right now. They're like, what impact could I have? Like, I'm 14. You have an impact. One, you absolutely can impact people older than you.
• 30:11
  I'm impacted by my students every single day. Every single day I'm impacted by my students. So much so of the time it is positive. And I try not to, you know, be... It's up to other people to...
• 30:26
  I'm like, I'm responsible for regulating my own emotions and whatever, but I am impacted. I am inspired. I am touched. I am encouraged by my students every single day. And I just love them so much.
• 30:36
  But if you are young, it is, oh my gosh, don't even get me started on Timothy. Hold on, hold up. First Timothy four twelve, Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech and conduct in love and faith and impurity. And I say this to the students. I say this to the young, which I am kind of young, but not if you ask my students.
• 30:57
  But I say this to say, you are not too young to make an impact. And I have been so encouraged by my students. I have been so encouraged by young people. You have an impact. And it is also how beautiful that the Lord has you at a place where you can...
• 31:17
  You are intentionally planted where you are. You are the only one of you and you are able to choose him in a way that so many people around you. I mean, if you are in a school setting, you are being watched. And so that's so beautiful. And so you are encouraging people your age.
• 31:33
  You are encouraging people younger than you, people older than you, your teachers. Do not diminish the impact that you have, especially if you have siblings. I just want you to know you have an impact and each person has an impact. And if the Lord woke you up today, He has a purpose and impact that He wants you to make today, in your life. And that can look so many different ways wherever you are.
• 31:56
  Gosh, I just even am reminded of, I'm reading this book. This man went through a really tragic accident and he's in the hospital and he's in the hospital for a very long time and very much in pain. And I just am even thinking of someone like feeling almost like helpless, like in that situation where it's like, what impact can I possibly have? I'm like trapped in this hospital bed for a very long time. And again, if the Lord has woken you up today, He has a purpose for your life and we might not do things perfectly.
• 32:21
  And we might literally make the wrong choices sometimes, but He is using our lives and we get to be a witness to many. And you just hear the stories of people being in hospitals or different things where the impact they have is so affects the staff at the hospital, affects the people in the room next door. Like just how we witness to Christ and just pull through in ways to honor Jesus. And we won't do it perfectly, but by His grace, He will get His glory. And I've watched that where I'm like, I did not make the best choice.
• 32:54
  And people are like, I saw the Lord in this thing that you did. And I'm like, what? I thought I made the complete wrong choice. Like I thought I literally missed the mark and you're telling me you saw God get glory. Like, are you're glorifying the Lord because of it?
• 33:04
  What? I'm so confused. But praise the Lord. So do not diminish the impact the Lord wants to have on your life. Believe for it.
• 33:12
  Don't discount what the Lord is calling you to, and be blessed. I will see you next time on Choosing Jesus.