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Why do narcissists cheat? · The Mental Healness Podcast

• 0:00
  What is going on, beautiful people?
• 0:03
  Welcome to another episode of the Narcissist Code.
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  I'm your favorite selfaware narcissist, Mr. Lee Hammock,
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  better known as mental illness across all social media
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  platforms. This is the first time I see my
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  face or hearing my lovely voice. I'm a clinically diagnosed
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  narcissist and I use my platform on social media to raise
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  awareness for NPD, get more people into therapy and also
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  validate the victims, survivors and the thrivers of said
• 0:24
  disorder. Said Toxic people, said Toxic
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  traits. Today's episode y'all is going
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  to be about why do narcissists cheat.
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  Oh my goodness do. Great question right there.
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  It's like the great question of narcissism.
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  Why do narcissists cheat? Why?
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  Why? Why?
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  Okay. Before we hop into today's
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  episode y'all you know I got to shout out my selflove journal
• 0:47
  that is available on Amazon. Lee Hammock.
• 0:50
  I love me a selflove journal available on Amazon.
• 0:54
  Like I said, search Lee Hammock Selflove to help you rebuild
• 0:56
  that selflove, self love course coming out here pretty soon the
• 0:59
  next couple of weeks. So stay tuned for that as well.
• 1:03
  But yeah, yeah, why do narcissists cheat cheat, cheat.
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  So first of all y'all, one reason why narcissists cheat is
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  because that one person is not enough for narcissists.
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  And this is not questioning your this is not me telling you
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  you're not worth it. This is not me questioning your
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  value or your worth or your you know, you're just this.
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  This has nothing. It has way less to do with with
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  you than you think it does. You know, because a lot, a lot
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  of narcissistic people cheat just because one person is not
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  enough. It's just like I can't.
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  Like you need. You always need more.
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  The word a lot of people, the word a lot of people use is
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  supply. You always need more supply from
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  different sources, from different people.
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  You want the supply to keep. You wanted to keep flowing and
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  whatnot. So when you need it, when you're
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  looking for that supply, it's just like you have this one
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  source. Like you might be enough for a
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  little while, y'all like your relationship might be going good
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  for a little bit. Then all of a sudden I don't
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  know where they just start cheating on you.
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  Or they start like they start building up, they start building
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  up to cheat on you. They start like a little
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  emotional cheating. They start like doing a little.
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  You mean, I don't know if you some people would consider
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  liking provocative photos and leaving provocative, sending
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  provocative messages and the provocative comments and things
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  like that. A lot of people consider that
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  cheating as well. But some people used it as a
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  buildup that's like a precursor to the to get getting to the act
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  of clapping some cheeks. You see what I'm saying?
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  There's like a precursor to get to that point where they going
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  to be doing something else other than just like leaving each
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  other like little comments and stuff like that.
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  It just it's just because whatever supply or validation
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  that that narcissistic person is getting from you, it runs low
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  and or it runs out. You see what I'm saying and
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  that's that has very little to do with you is going to run out
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  sooner or later. It's like having a it's like
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  having a trust fund of $50,000, which is not, you know, it could
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  be a lot to some people. There's not a lot to somebody,
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  but there's not a lot either. You see what I'm saying?
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  It's like having a $50,000 trust fund that you get when you turn
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  18, right? You turn 18, you get the trust
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  fund, and then you don't get a job.
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  You just spending money frivolously.
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  You see what I'm saying? That runs out eventually.
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  If there's nothing there to replenish it.
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  If you're not, if that person does, if the person using the
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  trust spending the trust fund doesn't replenish it, then it
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  just goes away. You see what I'm saying?
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  That's what it is right there. They're just using up the trust
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  fund of supply from you, and they're not in they themselves
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  or not doing anything to replenish that supply.
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  They're not working. They're not putting the work.
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  They're literally not putting the work in.
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  They replenish that trust fund of supply that they're getting
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  from you. You know what I'm saying?
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  You're putting the work in. You're like you are the bank.
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  Like you are you're you. You got compound interest going
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  on. You got, you know you got
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  compound interest going on. You are the bank.
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  You have a lot of stuff going on for you, but you get a lot of
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  narcissistic people who it isn't.
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  It just doesn't work that way out.
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  You know what I'm saying? It just, it's just not how it
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  goes, but that's the mindset of it all.
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  That's the mindset that a lot of people go through when you're
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  dealing with toxic, narcissistic people.
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  It's just part of it right there.
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  You know, that's really is part of it, but it's just the supply
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  runs out. Y'all supply runs out and they
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  want a a fresh source. And just because they cheat on
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  you y'all doesn't mean that they will leave you.
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  They just sometimes they will because they think, they think
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  you know the grass is greener or whatever or the the the new, the
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  next trust fund quote UN quote new person or whatever can
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  replenish them more. But most times they think they
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  put it onto you, you know what I'm saying?
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  Most times they put it directly onto you.
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  They put their blame on you. It's always going to be your
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  fault that they cheated on you. You know what I'm saying?
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  Because the supply that they get from you ran out.
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  You you didn't show me any more love.
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  You didn't talk to me anymore. So I had to go find it somewhere
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  else and they'll cheat on you. Another reason that narcissists,
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  the people cheat on you. Y'all.
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  It's just because the opportunity presents itself.
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  Opportunity y'all, You know, the temptation presents itself and
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  they can't say no. They don't want to say no.
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  You know what I'm saying? It's just like it within the
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  narcissist brains. Something takes over and makes
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  them do it and they'll blame. And that's why you get a lot of
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  narcissistic people that when you find, if you find out that
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  they cheated on you, they'll say, I never meant to hurt you.
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  They'll say that in in in their minds, they might actually mean
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  it. I never meant to hurt you.
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  This just had, this is so sporadic.
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  This just happened out of nowhere.
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  I didn't mean for this to happen.
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  This just this just came out of no, yeah, because the the
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  opportunity presented it itself and they just took it.
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  You see what I'm saying? Somebody showed them.
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  Somebody showed them some kindness or some niceness.
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  You see what I'm saying? And then they just did it and
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  then they just kept doing it. But then it becomes a choice
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  right there. Y'all.
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  See, cheating is a choice. I don't.
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  You can. You can talk to any narcissist,
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  the person you want to y'all, but at the end of the day
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  they're cheating. Stuff that narcissist the people
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  do or talk to people, whoever the cheaters do.
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  It's a choice. It's not just like it's not like
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  a magic potion or a spell that's been put on the that makes you
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  drop your, drop, your draws and clap cheeks it.
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  There's nothing that there's not a magic voodoo sorcery curse
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  going on. They choose to do it and
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  sometimes you have the opportunity to just present
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  this. If they get drunk, they go out,
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  have fun and then somebody shows, shows them a little bit
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  of attention and then all of a sudden that's all it takes.
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  It's just opportunity, you know? Again, I didn't mean to hurt
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  you. It wasn't playing.
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  This came out of nowhere. You see what I'm saying?
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  A lot of this stuff will start happening and they'll start
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  making those excuses to as to why they've been doing this
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  stuff to you and they keep it out and it doesn't.
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  Yeah. And once they do it and you
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  catch them and you don't leave them, they will keep doing it.
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  They won't stop doing it. You see what I'm saying?
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  They'll just keep doing it because they think if you
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  forgive them, they think it's okay.
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  They think you're okay with the behaviors.
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  They think you, you're okay with how they treat you.
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  They think you're okay with all this other stuff.
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  You know what I'm saying? Another reason that narcissistic
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  people will cheat on y'all is to hurt you.
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  Some of them will hurt you y'all.
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  Some of them will do it on purpose.
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  Some of them seek to hurt you on purpose.
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  He's like, why do they want to hurt us?
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  Y'all. Sometimes they want to get back
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  at you for something that they feel like you did wrong to them.
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  Like you. Like you might have flew you
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  might have. You might have been that audit
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  might and our statistic robot has to reboot.
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  Talking about cheating and overheating, they might perceive
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  you as being as committing, you know, adultery or something
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  against them. If you if somehow the wait, the
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  waiter or waitress shows you some extra attention.
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  You make eye contact with a member of the opposite sex or
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  the same sex. You make eye contact with a
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  member of the sex that you are attracted to.
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  You know what I'm saying? You may I contact with that
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  person. And that's in the narcissist
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  mind that's cheated on them. So they feel like they have to
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  get you back, You know what I'm saying?
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  They have. They feel like they have to get
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  you back. They try to punish you for
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  something that you might not even done have done y'all they
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  might try to they try to punish you for something that you might
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  not have done. You know what I'm saying?
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  It just it just, it just Wilder sometimes in the mind of a
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  narcissistic person. They they want, they want to
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  hurt you for they because they think that you hurt them, that
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  you sought out to hurt them. I'm telling you, I'm telling
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  you, it it it it does come from in the situation right there.
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  It does come from a place of malicious intent.
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  They're trying they're trying to hurt you.
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  There's not there's not a mistake.
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  They're trying to they're trying to inflict the pain upon you in
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  this situation right here. So yeah, it it is on purpose.
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  Well, Lee, is it on purpose? Yeah.
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  Yeah. Yes, it's on purpose.
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  It is. Trust me.
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  But it's the mindset W it goes deep into it.
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  We are dealing with toxic narcissistic people and that's
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  how they do you. You know that.
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  That's literally how they'll do you.
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  And like I said, they they come from a place of just trying to
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  hurt you and what? Not the malicious intent.
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  Like I said, they they they want to, they want to cause some pain
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  to you know and another reason y'all the narcissistic people
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  will cheat on you emotionally and physically is because some
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  of them are addicts. Some of them don't literally
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  are, you know, sex addicts. They just sometimes they can't
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  help themselves. They just like, they're addicted
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  to it. They're like, it doesn't matter
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  what the other person looks like, doesn't matter.
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  You know what? A lot of things don't matter.
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  It's just like they're getting that.
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  They're getting that feel that, you know, that FILL, that feel
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  of, you know, that sexual, the sexual gratification.
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  And I know the situation like this is like, if they're a sex
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  addict, can we help them? You know, why don't they just do
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  what me They might do what you and the other people and other
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  people, you know what I'm saying?
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  They might cheat on you to be sinister and just get away with
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  you. Some of them, some of them will
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  cheat on you just to get away with it.
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  Just to do something sinister behind the scenes because it
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  just makes them feel good that they've done something and got
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  away with it. You know what I mean?
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  They it it does. Y'all.
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  I was just saying the the mind of a narcissistic person works
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  is very strange sometimes. Y'all and that's coming from a
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  diagnosed Narciss because I understand the dynamics of it.
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  Y'all. And I said it is crazy, Y'all
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  and I'm going to, I'm going to do a longer video on this.
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  Just because they cheat on you, does they?
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  It doesn't. They don't think that means that
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  they don't. They don't love you.
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  They think that they can cheat on you and love you at the same
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  time. It doesn't affect it.
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  It's like the two things are not mutually inclusive.
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  They don't have, you know, they don't have to be going on the
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  same time. It's just because I cheated on
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  you doesn't mean I don't love you and stuff like that.
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  And one last thing, Y'all. Some narcissist people will
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  cheat on you because they actually think that you cheated
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  on them. They think that you cheated on
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  them, or they fear that you're going to cheat on them.
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  They'll cheat on you because they think you are going to
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  cheat. Or did you have already cheated?
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  Sometimes it's paranoia that leads them to cheating on you.
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  Y'all. And like I said at the end of
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  the day, y'all. None of these things that I told
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  you today make it okay to cheat on you.
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  None of it. Absolutely zero of this makes it
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  okay for them to cheat on you. So just really just let me
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  reaffirm that into your mind. It doesn't make regardless of
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  why they cheated on you, it doesn't make it okay, Let's say
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  it again. Regardless of why they did it,
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  it doesn't make it okay, boom, boom, boom.
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  It just doesn't like, well, they they're six out of can I help
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  you out. It doesn't make it okay.
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  It doesn't make it okay. And the more you forgive the
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  narcissist the person, the more they'll keep doing the same
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  thing over and over again because they think that you're
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  okay with the behavior. Now you see what I'm saying?
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  It's a slippery slope. It's a slippery slope of
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  toxicity. Anyways, y'all let me wrap this
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  thing up. I appreciate, I truly appreciate
• 11:47
  every single one of y'all y'all. I'm super thankful for.
• 11:49
  You made it this far. Go ahead and leave, you know.
• 11:51
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  Y'all Miss Illness is out Peace. Thank you so much for making it
• 12:01
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• 12:18
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• 12:20
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