Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Meaningful Feedback for Each Enneagram Type

Transcript

Meaningful Feedback for Each Enneagram Type · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being extremely uncomfortable, and 10 being completely comfortable, how would you rate your comfort level with receiving feedback?
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: Receiving feedback can be tough, but providing feedback, well, that can be even tougher.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: And for some personality types, feedback can feel the same as conflict.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: Some run towards it, and others run in the opposite direction.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: But meaningful feedback doesn't hinder performance.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: It fuels it.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, in a 2021 Workplace Scallop poll, when employees strongly agreed that they received meaningful feedback, they were almost four times more likely than other employees to be engaged and satisfied at work.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: So this leads me to believe that meaningful feedback creates an environment of continuous improvement and growth, enhanced communication and collaboration, and employee engagement and satisfaction.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: Ready to learn more about how to make meaningful feedback a reality in your world?
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, let's get to it.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: Life can be a whirlwind, juggling family, work, and all the in-betweens.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: As a wife, mom to three teenagers, and building a growing business, I felt the overwhelm, the doubts, and the struggles too.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: But here's the thing: the Lord took my broken-hearted pieces and turned them into a beautiful story of clarity, peace, and joy.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: And now I'm here to help you do the same.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: With years of experience as a certified Enneagram coach, spiritual director, and working genius facilitator, I am here to provide you with practical wisdom and inspiration.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: Through expert interviews and real life examples, you can uncover your strengths, motivations, and God's unwavering love.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: And together, we're gonna explore biblical truths, different personality profiles, and life rhythms that will empower you to break free from anxiety, shame, and frustration.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: I have walked the path, my friend, and I know the challenges you face.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: But that's why I'm here, by your side, cheering you on as you embrace wholehearted living.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: So grab your headphones, invite a friend, and let's embark on this transformative journey together.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Simply Wholehearted, where we laugh, learn, and flourish as a community.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: Back at the bustling offices of Hustle and Grind, a new project ensues with the dynamic team members of Alexa, Dana, and Wanda.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: But quickly, tensions started to simmer beneath the surface.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: Alexa led the project and was keen on getting everything done efficiently and rapidly.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: She had a clear vision of what needed to be done and how to do it.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: However, her approach created frustration with Dana because she believed that everything had to be done in exact steps.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: She tended to micromanage and thought Alexa's approach was way too hasty.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: Wanda kept her thoughts to herself, as she often did.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: She felt overwhelmed by the conflict or the tension between Dana and Alexa.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: She did have ideas to input for the project, but she honestly just didn't want to rock the boat.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: As days went by, the tension on the office grew.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: Alexa couldn't understand why Dana was so nitpicky, and Dana felt that Alexa disregarded her input, and Wanda felt like a peacemaker trapped in a turbulent sea.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: One afternoon, as they sat in the break room, Dana decided it was time to address the elephant in the room.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: And before she lost her gumption, she said, Alexa, I appreciate your leadership, but sometimes it feels like you're not open to feedback.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: Alexa was taken aback but realized that Dana was speaking truth.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: She had been so focused on efficiency that she had not considered Dana's perspective.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: So she quickly replied, You're right, Dana.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry if I came across the way I did.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: I do value your input and I want us to work well together.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: Encouraged by the breakthrough, Wanda chimed in, and I think I need to be more vocal about how I feel.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: I've been holding back and it's not helping anyone.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: The three women decided to have a feedback session where they would openly share their thoughts and concerns.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: Dana learned that Alexa appreciated her eye for detail, and Alexa understood that Dana's perfectionism could be an asset.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: And when I also came to believe that her unique insights had a valuable perspective and an important contribution to the team.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Over time, they became more cohesive and effective together.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_00: They learned that when giving constructively and receiving openly, meaningful feedback could lead to growth and better outcomes that create a harmonious work environment, even at Hustle and Grind.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: As they embrace feedback as a valuable tool for personal and professional development, their projects flourished as a result.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: Yay! I love sharing another win for the team at Hustle and Grind.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: Now, since I already shared three benefits of meaningful feedback, I wanted to then dive into four key elements that make feedback truly meaningful, regardless of your personality type.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: First of all, feedback must be timely.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: If feedback is only given at traditional annual reviews, it delays leadership or everyone else on the team to keep a long list that has to be presented at the right time.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: Immediacy helps normalize the process and it makes everyone involved in the feedback loop less intimidating and it also feels less threatening for everyone.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: So try to keep feedback happening in real time, not weeks or months later.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: And to add to that, feedback must be frequent.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: When feedback is treated like an open dialogue and not a conflict or confrontation, it can be so valuable, especially when it can occur immediately after an action.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_00: For example, it can be several times a week within or after team meetings related to a recent project in which both the success is celebrated and performance is calibrated and adjusted.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now feedback also must be focused.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: When those engaged in the feedback process have clarity on the needs of the individual plus their unique strengths and obstacles, the feedback is specific and measurable.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: The feedback recipient is likelier to feel that the celebration or calibration and adjustments are fair, doable, and very specific for their growth and success.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: And feedback must be future-oriented.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: So even though feedback is often focused on past events, when you add in the possibility of success in the near future or offer a next time opportunity, it becomes more meaningful.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_00: Add in open questions like, what would you have done differently?
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_00: Or what will you do differently next time?
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: And keep the feedback moving forward and the receiver involved in the process of what happens next.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: All right, with that foundation in place and those four keys of meaningful feedback, are you ready for a specific tip and takeaway for each Enneagram type?
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: All right, I'm gonna dive into all nine types, but please make me a promise.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to listen to each one of these.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: Don't just zone out until I talk about your type.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: Because as you know, I love using the Enneagram to build relationships.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I want you to do that as well, not only in compassion, but also how to engage with others in a healthier way.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: So in this tip rundown, I'm gonna share a specific idea of how to offer feedback to each type.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: And then if you are that type, how you can better receive feedback.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm guessing you likely work with all nine types or you want to get to know how to offer meaningful feedback to the folks around you.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_00: So learn from both sides, not only how to receive feedback better for yourselves and what it looks like to get good feedback, but how to give it and offer it to others.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: Of course, if you resonate with what I share, I bet you would love to pass along the idea of this concise insight either to a coworker or a leadership team, so that way they can utilize these tips to offer you more meaningful feedback.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: All right, first up, we're gonna start with the gut triad types Thineagram 8, 9, and 1.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: If you're giving feedback to a type 8, be direct and assertive, but not aggressive.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: Respect the person's autonomy and strength, and then provide feedback that allows them to maintain control over their decisions and how they implement the feedback.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you are an 8 receiving feedback, try hard to not respond with defensiveness or anger.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: Instead, listen openly and consider the feedback as a way to enhance your effectiveness.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: If you're giving a type 9 feedback, be gentle and emphasize unity.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: Acknowledge the person's perspective and their importance of maintaining peace.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: Encourage collaboration and their value to the team.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a nine receiving feedback, avoid complacency or tuning out.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: Engage in active listening and consider how feedback can contribute to a more harmonious environment.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: If you're giving feedback to type one, be specific and constructive in that feedback.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: Focus on the facts and avoid criticizing the person's character while also offering solutions and doable adjustments for improvement.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: If you are a type one receiving feedback, remember that feedback is an opportunity for growth.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_00: Don't be too critical of yourself.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: Listen actively and consider the feedback objectively, but then move on and don't focus on the negative.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: Now let's talk about those heart types, the Enneagram 2, 3, and 4.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_00: If you're giving feedback to a type 2, be gentle and considerate in your feedback.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: Emphasize your concern for the person's well-being and provide positive reinforcement along with areas for improvement.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're a type 2 receiving that feedback, don't take feedback too personally.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: Remember that it's about actions, not your worth.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: And be open to receiving help and support from others, especially if you might need to delegate more so you can perform better.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_00: If you're giving feedback to a type 3, be direct and to the point.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: Focus on results and achievements, and provide clear goals and expectations for improvement.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: And remember, they are going to want to do it better next time, so give them plenty of room to do that.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a type 3 that is receiving feedback, appreciate feedback as a way to reach your goals more effectively.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: Be open to others' input, even if it means adjusting your approach or maybe even the goal.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_00: And please remember, feedback does not indicate that you have failed in some way.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: If you are offering feedback to a type 4, be sensitive to the person's feelings.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: Acknowledge their unique contribution to the team and the creativity they add.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_00: Provide empathy and opportunities for emotional support along with the feedback.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're a type 4 receiving feedback, remember that this information does not define your identity.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: Don't receive it as confirmation that something is irreversibly flawed or missing.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: Focus on constructive aspects and how you have had an opportunity to grow in your individuality.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: And now for the head triad types, the type 5, 6, and 7.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: If you're giving feedback to a type 5, be concise and factual in your feedback.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_00: Respect the person's need for privacy and space, and give them time to process the feedback.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a type 5 receiving feedback, don't withdraw or become defensive.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: Instead, engage in a thoughtful discussion about this information that you've received.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: Ask questions to gain a deeper understanding, and don't just challenge their perspective, but spend a little time researching it.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: If you're offering a type 6 feedback, be reassuring and provide a sense of security.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: And give time to make sure they feel safe.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_00: Emphasize their strengths and their loyalty, and offer practical solutions and guidance.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_00: If you are a type 6 receiving feedback, remember it's not a threat to your security.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: Be open to other people's perspectives and consider how it can enhance your preparedness and your overall sense of safety in the environment that you are working in, or maybe the relationships you are in.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_00: If you're offering a type 7 feedback, be positive and future oriented.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_00: Highlight opportunities and adventures, and encourage the person to explore new possibilities now that they have this new information.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a 7 receiving feedback, avoid deflecting or minimizing the information.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: Embrace the feedback as a way to make your enthusiasm more focused and effective.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: And do your best to be present in the moment while you're receiving the information.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_00: Last but not least, here are some overall tips and strategies for creating an environment where meaningful feedback thrives.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, you don't just have to be the one in charge to begin this healthy feedback loop.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_00: You can just be part of a team that offers this information that can provide healthy change that is needed in your workplace.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_00: So, first of all, remember feedback is not limited to top-down communication.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_00: That's right, it doesn't just have to come from the top-down.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_00: You can ask for feedback from your leadership, but you can also offer meaningful feedback.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: You can be the one to go first.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_00: Now, again, whether you're a business leader or an employee, encourage expressing appreciation for all forms of feedback.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you don't get as much as you want or as often as you desire, but take the time to say thank you and acknowledge the feedback when it's given, even if it's just small and here and there.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: That will help communicate that you really value this and you would maybe enjoy more meaningful feedback in your world.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: Do your part to be intentional to promote honest, open, and ongoing dialogue.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: And don't forget the value of peer-to-peer feedback.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to wait for conflict with a peer or fellow employee to voice your perspective on a situation.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: And of course, remember to lead by example through fast feedback.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, we want to give it frequently and quickly and not wait too long for that water to go under the bridge before we address needed issues.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, now that you have all these insights about feedback, would you be able to engage with feedback with greater ease and comfort?
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: Does it feel more possible for you to bring meaningful feedback into your work environment or maybe even your home?
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: While there is so much more that I would love to share with you, just like I do in a leadership and development training, or even in a 101 session, I hope that what I have shared helps you feel empowered to implement feedback in a way that will be a catalyst for growth and improvement.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: Don't forget to share this episode with your coworkers and leadership teams because they may have needed these insights to begin that culture of feedback where they are too.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_00: And if nothing else, I encourage you to go back and listen to that takeaway for your type and then use that information to begin a conversation with those you need meaningful feedback from, right?
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: So instead of just saying, hey, I need meaningful feedback, you have some tips and tricks to offer them to support you in a better way.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_00: I do hope that you're gleaning so much from this Enneagram at Works series for every facet of life.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: I do have one more episode before we do a brief relationship series and then head into our advent season.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my goodness, saying that is hard to believe.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: But I am excited because, as usual, there is so much goodness headed your way.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: All right, until next time, friend, continue to pursue God's perspective, purpose, and plans for your simply wholehearted life.