Latest / The Confident Entrepreneur With Jennifer Ann Johnson / Why Success Can Feel Lonely: The Hidden Cost of Entrepreneurship
Transcript
- 0:38Jennifer Johnson: Today we're talking about something that most entrepreneurs experience but rarely discuss the profound loneliness that can come with building a business.
- 0:47Jennifer Johnson: Here's the paradox.
- 0:48Jennifer Johnson: Entrepreneurship is supposed to be about freedom, creativity, and building something meaningful.
- 0:53Jennifer Johnson: We're told it's about living the life on your own terms and creating a lifestyle that you want.
- 0:58Jennifer Johnson: But what they don't tell you is the journey can be really isolating.
- 1:02Jennifer Johnson: You're making decisions that nobody fully understands.
- 1:06Jennifer Johnson: You're carrying stress and responsibility that you can't share with most of the people in your life.
- 1:11Jennifer Johnson: And you're celebrating wins and processing setbacks largely on your own.
- 1:16Jennifer Johnson: I remember sitting in my home office one evening after a huge win, the kind of breakthrough that validated everything that I've been working towards.
- 1:24Jennifer Johnson: When I looked around for someone to celebrate with, I realized how alone I felt in my success.
- 1:29Jennifer Johnson: My family was proud, but they didn't really understand what this win meant.
- 1:34Jennifer Johnson: My friends were supportive, but they couldn't relate to the journey it had taken to get there.
- 1:40Jennifer Johnson: That's when I realized that the entrepreneurial loneliness isn't about being physically alone.
- 1:45Jennifer Johnson: It's about being emotionally and intellectually isolated in a way that's unique to just entrepreneurs.
- 1:52Jennifer Johnson: Today I want to talk about why this happens and why it's more common than one might think.
- 1:57Jennifer Johnson: And most importantly, how to find and build that community that can support and sustain you through your journey.
- 2:05Jennifer Johnson: Entrepreneurial loneliness isn't like other types of loneliness.
- 2:09Jennifer Johnson: It's not about being alone, it's about being alone with experiences and challenges and perspectives that most people in life can't relate to or understand.
- 2:17Jennifer Johnson: As an entrepreneur, you're constantly making decisions that affect not just your own life, but potentially the lives of your employees, your family, your customers.
- 2:26Jennifer Johnson: The weight of these decisions can feel huge.
- 2:29Jennifer Johnson: And yet, you often have to make them without anyone to turn to who really understands.
- 2:36Jennifer Johnson: When things go well, you may feel like you can't fully celebrate because people either don't understand what you accomplished, or they attribute your success to luck.
- 2:45Jennifer Johnson: When things go poorly, you may feel like you can't fully process the disappointment because people either don't understand why it matters so much, or they offer advice that doesn't fit your situation.
- 2:58Jennifer Johnson: Becoming an entrepreneur often means your identity shifts in ways that can create distance from your previous social circles.
- 3:06Jennifer Johnson: You may find that you have less in common with friends who have traditional jobs, not because you think you're better than them, but because your daily experiences and concerns are so different.
- 3:15Jennifer Johnson: You're thinking about things like cash flow and customer acquisition, and they're thinking about office politics and vacation days.
- 3:23Jennifer Johnson: Neither perspective is better or worse, but they can be hard to bridge in casual conversation.
- 3:30Jennifer Johnson: Unlike employees who generally leave work at work, entrepreneurs carry their business with them mentally almost all the time.
- 3:37Jennifer Johnson: You're thinking about problems and opportunities and decisions.
- 3:41Jennifer Johnson: It can be difficult to share this with others who don't get it because you can't just turn off your business brain.
- 3:48Jennifer Johnson: Understanding why entrepreneurial loneliness is so prevalent can help normalize the experience and point towards solutions.
- 3:58Jennifer Johnson: Our culture often romanticizes the image of the solopreneur who builds something amazing through sheer individual will and determination.
- 4:07Jennifer Johnson: This mythology makes it seem like needing support or community is somehow a sign of weakness.
- 4:13Jennifer Johnson: The truth is that even the most successful entrepreneurs rely heavily on networks and mentors and advisors.
- 4:20Jennifer Johnson: But because we don't often see the support system, we assume that they're just naturally good at going in alone.
- 4:27Jennifer Johnson: Being an entrepreneur requires you to be vulnerable in ways that can be uncomfortable.
- 4:31Jennifer Johnson: You're putting your ideas and your judgment and your competency on display for the world to evaluate.
- 4:37Jennifer Johnson: It can make it hard to open up about struggles and fears and uncertainties.
- 4:42Jennifer Johnson: And then there's the time and energy constraints.
- 7:11Jennifer Johnson: Building a business is incredibly demanding of your time and your energy, which can make it hard to maintain relationships and build new ones.
- 7:18Jennifer Johnson: You may find yourself declining social invitations and missing important events or being physically or mentally present because it's very isolating.
- 7:29Jennifer Johnson: And depending upon your location or your industry, it can be really hard to find other entrepreneurs who understand the experience.
- 7:38Jennifer Johnson: If you're in a small town or working in a niche industry, you may be one of the few people around you who are even on the entrepreneurial journey.
- 7:49Jennifer Johnson: And the loneliness isn't just an uncomfortable feeling.
- 7:52Jennifer Johnson: It has real costs, both to personal well-being and to business success.
- 7:56Jennifer Johnson: There's the mental health impact, which is stress combined with social isolation, can take a toll on you, causing anxiety or depression or burnout.
- 8:06Jennifer Johnson: Without community and support, it's easy to get stuck in those negative thought patterns.
- 8:11Jennifer Johnson: Then you have reduced resilience.
- 8:13Jennifer Johnson: Entrepreneurs involves inevitable setbacks and failures and disappointments.
- 8:19Jennifer Johnson: So having a support system doesn't prevent those challenges, but it helps you process them.
- 8:25Jennifer Johnson: And that also leads to limited growth and learning.
- 8:28Jennifer Johnson: Some of the most valuable learning in entrepreneurship comes from peer interaction.
- 8:32Jennifer Johnson: Hearing how other people have handled similar challenges is very helpful to another entrepreneur.
- 8:38Jennifer Johnson: So, with that said, how do you build your network?
- 8:43Jennifer Johnson: Creating community and support as an entrepreneur requires you to be intentional.
- 8:47Jennifer Johnson: And it's one of the most valuable investments that you could make, not just for your business, but also for you personally.
- 8:55Jennifer Johnson: And not all support is the same.
- 8:58Jennifer Johnson: There's peer support, which comes from other entrepreneurs who face similar challenges.
- 9:02Jennifer Johnson: There's mentor support, which comes from people who've been where you're at and help give you guidance.
- 9:08Jennifer Johnson: Advisory support comes from people with specific expertise, like a lawyer or an accountant.
- 9:14Jennifer Johnson: And then there's personal support, which comes from family and friends.
- 9:17Jennifer Johnson: And they give you emotional and uh emotional support and encouragement.
- 9:24Jennifer Johnson: So, how do you actually find these people that you want to have as your support system?
- 9:30Jennifer Johnson: Well, there's a few places to look.
- 9:33Jennifer Johnson: Industry and professional organizations.
- 9:35Jennifer Johnson: Do you belong to one of them?
- 9:37Jennifer Johnson: That is a great place to look.
- 9:39Jennifer Johnson: Entrepreneurship-focused groups.
- 9:41Jennifer Johnson: A lot of communities have meetups and all those kinds of things for business owners.
- 9:46Jennifer Johnson: There's the Young Entrepreneurs Organization, there's entrepreneur organizations, all kinds of different ones to look at.
- 9:53Jennifer Johnson: Perhaps you can look on Facebook or other social media.
- 9:56Jennifer Johnson: And there's places like that.
- 9:58Jennifer Johnson: There's mastermind groups, which are peer-to-peer mentoring programs.
- 10:01Jennifer Johnson: Typically that's a pay-to-play kind of thing, but it's very helpful.
- 10:06Jennifer Johnson: And then, like I mentioned, there's the digital communities, which are your virtual ones that you could find on Facebook or LinkedIn.
- 10:13Jennifer Johnson: There's a lot of different ones that can definitely be of help for you.
- 10:18Jennifer Johnson: Finding community is the first step.
- 10:21Jennifer Johnson: And building those relationships requires ongoing effort and intentionality.
- 10:26Jennifer Johnson: One of the fastest ways to build those connections is to be honest about your challenges and your uncertainties.
- 10:32Jennifer Johnson: When you share genuine struggles, you give other people the permission to be authentic as well.
- 10:38Jennifer Johnson: And it's important to be open.
- 10:41Jennifer Johnson: And that's the best way to build those relationships.
- 10:44Jennifer Johnson: So you want to lead with your value, not your needs.
- 10:47Jennifer Johnson: So you want to provide a value to the people in your group to be a support of them before you start just dumping your needs.
- 10:56Jennifer Johnson: Then building meaningful relationships require consistent investments over time.
- 11:01Jennifer Johnson: It may mean committing to attend networking events every month or every week.
- 11:06Jennifer Johnson: Or it may mean that you have to meet with a mentor every so often.
- 11:12Jennifer Johnson: Whatever that looks like, commit to that consistency.
- 11:16Jennifer Johnson: But be strategic about your time investment.
- 11:18Jennifer Johnson: Consistency is important, but you also need to be strategic about where you invest your time.
- 11:25Jennifer Johnson: Focus on communities and individuals where you feel that connection.
- 11:30Jennifer Johnson: Otherwise, you're just wasting your time.
- 11:34Jennifer Johnson: One of the biggest challenges in building the community is maintaining those relationships when you're already stretched thin.
- 11:41Jennifer Johnson: And it all comes down to quality over quantity.
- 11:43Jennifer Johnson: You don't need a huge network, you just need a few deep and meaningful relationships.
- 11:48Jennifer Johnson: That's much more valuable than dozens of superficial connections.
- 11:54Jennifer Johnson: And I know I briefly touched on virtual communities.
- 11:58Jennifer Johnson: They are very important because they give you access to peers no matter where they're at.
- 12:04Jennifer Johnson: And it allows for ongoing conversation and support rather than just periodic meetups.
- 12:09Jennifer Johnson: They can be really valuable for entrepreneurs that are especially in niche industries or small markets where local communities might be pretty limited.
- 12:17Jennifer Johnson: But nothing compares to that in-person event where you can physically see people.
- 12:23Jennifer Johnson: So if you have a chance, that is the best way to go.
- 12:28Jennifer Johnson: So what is the return on your investment to be part of an entrepreneurial community?
- 12:33Jennifer Johnson: Well, there are several.
- 12:35Jennifer Johnson: You have access to resources and opportunities that you may not have had if you were not part of that group.
- 12:41Jennifer Johnson: You can have improved decision making, having people that you trust that have been through it really worth its weight in gold, which also then makes the learning curve much more compressed, much less.
- 12:55Jennifer Johnson: You are taking less time to make decisions because you have other people around you who could help.
- 13:01Jennifer Johnson: And that also leads to increased resilience.
- 13:04Jennifer Johnson: Having that support network helps you recover from your setbacks much quicker than it does if you did not have that.
- 13:12Jennifer Johnson: A lot of entrepreneurs want community and support, but face barriers that prevent them from building those connections.
- 13:20Jennifer Johnson: One of them I hear all the time is the time excuse.
- 13:22Jennifer Johnson: Well, I don't have time.
- 13:23Jennifer Johnson: I don't have time.
- 13:25Jennifer Johnson: How do you not have time to invest in your business?
- 13:29Jennifer Johnson: Because that the end of the day, that's essentially what you're doing.
- 13:32Jennifer Johnson: Start small, commit to one networking group a month, and then you can add to it over time.
- 13:39Jennifer Johnson: Then there's the imposter syndrome barrier.
- 13:41Jennifer Johnson: A lot of people hesitate to engage in peer community because they don't feel like they're qualified or successful enough.
- 13:47Jennifer Johnson: You have value to offer to others, no matter what your level of success is.
- 13:52Jennifer Johnson: Just remember that you're all on an entrepreneurial journey.
- 13:55Jennifer Johnson: And then there's the geography limitation, whereas where you're at as far as location, but remember you can attend things virtual.
- 14:03Jennifer Johnson: That is the great thing that has come out of all of our years of technology.
- 14:09Jennifer Johnson: So as we wrap up today's episode, I want to remind you that the entrepreneurial loneliness isn't a character flaw or a sign that you're not cut out for this journey.
- 14:17Jennifer Johnson: It's a normal part of being an entrepreneur.
- 14:20Jennifer Johnson: The difference between entrepreneurs who thrive and those who burn out is the quality of their support system and communities.
- 14:27Jennifer Johnson: You don't have to figure everything out on your own.
- 14:29Jennifer Johnson: You don't have to carry all the stress or uncertainty.
- 14:33Jennifer Johnson: Start small, attend one networking event, join one online, reach out to one potential mentor and schedule a one-on-one with them.
- 14:42Jennifer Johnson: Remember, the goal isn't to find people who are going to solve all of your problems and make everything easy.
- 14:47Jennifer Johnson: It's to find people who understand where you're at.
- 14:51Jennifer Johnson: Your business might be your individual creation, but your entrepreneurial journey doesn't have to be a solo one.
- 14:57Jennifer Johnson: The strongest entrepreneurs are those that build the strongest communities around themselves.