Latest / Unlocking The Paradigm Portal / When the Urge to Burn It All Down Comes Back (Authority Series Pt. 2)

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When the Urge to Burn It All Down Comes Back (Authority Series Pt. 2) · Unlocking The Paradigm Portal

• 0:00
  Hey everybody, welcome back to unlocking the Paradigm portal.
• 0:03
  My name is Sarah. So this is Part 2 of something
• 0:07
  we started in the last episode. Because don't blow up your life
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  is only step one. The real work is what you do
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  when the urge comes back. Because it will.
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  Not as a dramatic explosion, more like a quiet pressure that
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  says something has to change now.
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  And this is where authority comes in.
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  Now, authority isn't control over your life, it's leadership
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  over yourself or the ability to pause, assess, and choose your
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  actions. Instead of being driven by
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  urgency, fear and overwhelm, it is authority over you and your
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  choices. So when the urge to burn it all
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  down shows up again, it usually isn't loud.
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  It's persistent, and it feels like restlessness or irritation
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  or impatience. And it feels like a sense that
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  everything is wrong and you can't tolerate it anymore.
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  And your brain starts scanning for exit routes, not because
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  your life is unsalageable, but because your nervous system
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  wants relief. So harnessing that authority is
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  the ability to feel that urgency without obeying it.
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  And self authority isn't suppressing that urge.
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  It's standing still long enough to decide whether the urge
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  deserves action. And most people either react
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  immediately or they try to numb it out.
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  But authority does neither of those.
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  Authority says I hear you, I'm not ignoring you, but I'm
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  deciding the timing. And that alone changes
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  everything. It's literally taking your power
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  back. So when the impulse hits, try
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  this. Just name what's actually
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  happening, not my life is a mess that's falling into victim
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  mentality and that's being caught up in the whirlwind.
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  Instead of grounding yourself and instead acknowledging what
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  exactly it is that you're feeling, you may say I'm
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  overwhelmed or I'm exhausted or I'm scared, or maybe I need
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  relief. And this might seem overly
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  simplistic, but it's the reality of the most important thing that
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  you can do. Because specific language brings
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  your thinking brain back online, and this can help you widen your
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  timeline so authority thinks in days and months, not minutes.
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  It doesn't have that same degree of urgency, or at least if it
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  feels that urgency, it isn't run by it.
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  So instead try asking yourself what action would future me be
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  grateful for instead of what would currently feel better
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  about right now? And that differentiation alone
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  will break you from being caught up in the cyclone to being in
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  power, in control of your decisions for the your best
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  future. So authority.
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  Also, it looks like choosing contained action instead of
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  explosive action. And I know explosive action can
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  be kind of fun in the moment and it gives you that instant
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  gratification, but is it for your highest good?
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  And that is for you to decide. So instead of quitting, update
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  your resume. Instead of ending a
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  relationship, start the hard conversation, which frankly,
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  that's where most relationships go sideways.
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  People avoid the hard conversations for a multitude of
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  reasons. We can get into that another
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  day, but have the hard conversation and instead of
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  disappearing or just going radio silent, maybe take a day off.
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  And if you're feeling that restlessness in your body, try
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  finding some form of movement without destruction.
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  I just had a conversation with a couple of people about this,
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  that instead of trying to, you know, make all these massive
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  changes or try to force yourself into stillness and meditation,
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  maybe try dancing, put on some music with like a really good
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  tribal kind of beat. Stomp your feet, move your body
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  around. And authority is about change
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  without the chaos and direction, without the panic.
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  It is moving with intention. And at the end of this, this
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  episode, I'm going to clip the video that I did on intention
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  versus autopilot. Authority is all about making
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  every decision from a place of intention rather than just
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  running on old programming. And again, I'm going to
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  reiterate this over and over, there is no wrong choice.
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  You get to decide. That is your authority over your
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  own life. And whatever choice you make, do
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  it with intention and with your blinders off, fully aware.
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  So anyone can make a dramatic decision.
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  But authority is built by making regulated ones, by proving
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  yourself to yourself that you can tolerate discomfort without
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  abandoning your life, and by showing your nervous system that
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  urgency doesn't control you. And if your nervous system has
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  been hyperactive for a long time, urgency has been
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  controlling you. It's a safety mechanism.
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  There's no judgement in it. It's just an awareness of it.
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  And by being able to gradually shift your nervous system into
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  your own safety and recognize the urgency, but also set it
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  aside. That's how stability grows.
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  It's not from one big bold move, but from that consistent,
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  grounded, small baby step ones. So if the urge is back tonight,
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  it doesn't mean you failed. It means something inside you
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  still wants change. And your job isn't to silence
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  that voice. Your job is to lead with it.
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  You can want a different life without detonating the one you
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  have, and you can move forward without turning it into a
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  crisis. And you can change from
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  authority instead of reaction. It's just every little step you
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  take will be one more toward that shift into owning your
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  power. So here's your authority
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  reminder. You don't have to act just
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  because something feels urgent. Pause.
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  There is power in the pause. Allow yourself that moment.
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  Don't respond to the text. Don't respond to the voicemail.
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  Don't respond in the moment. It is OK.
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  And I am here giving you permission to say if you need
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  to, I need to sit with that for a little bit before I respond.
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  And that pause will allow you to stabilize.
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  And then that stabilization allows you to choose
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  deliberately what is best for you.
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  What is your yes? What is your no?
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  Because we're not here to prove our truth with chaos, and we're
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  here to build lives we don't need to escape from.
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  So I hope that you got something interesting out of this.
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  I hope it made you think and dive in with a little bit more
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  curiosity. And if this helped, follow the
• 7:17
  show. So it's here the next time you
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  need steady ground because authority isn't loud.
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  It's calm. It's clear and intentional and
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  it's yours. You decide.
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  Do you take the reins or are you led by the chaos?
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  So that is it for tonight and I will see you back in a few days.
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  As a heads up, I do some shorts on Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday
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  called Light in the Dark to help you calm yourself before going
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  to bed. And on Sunday, I'm doing a deep
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  dive longer episode where you'll get to know more about me.
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  I'm going to go follow on vulnerability so you know who
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  exactly you're listening to. So have a great evening and day.
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  I'm recording this Thursday night, hence the evening
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  references and I will be back soon.
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  Leave me a comment, like it, share it, subscribe, do all the
• 8:11
  things. There's something about hyping.
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  I don't fully understand it, but whatever, it doesn't matter.
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  I just want you to have that little glimmer of light in your
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  life that maybe prompts you to decide what's best for you.
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  Thank you so much for listening and I'll be back shortly.