Latest / Dear Chelsea / Minisode: Single White Female with Chelsea + Catherine

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Minisode: Single White Female with Chelsea + Catherine · Dear Chelsea

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hi Catherine, how are you Hi, Chelsea?
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: We're here for another minisode.
• 0:05
  Speaker 3: Minisod Welcome to a minisode.
• 0:07
  Speaker 4: So I have a follow up from Carly who called
• 0:09
  Speaker 4: in way back on our Lauren Lapkus episode. She was
• 0:13
  Speaker 4: ready to move on from situationships was sleeping with a
• 0:15
  Speaker 4: coworker and felt like she was kind of falling for
• 0:18
  Speaker 4: him and wanted to tell him. Our advice was to
• 0:20
  Speaker 4: tell him how she was feeling. So she says, hey, there,
• 0:24
  Speaker 4: thanks for checking in. I unfortunately don't have a success
• 0:27
  Speaker 4: story to fill you in on. I did take Chelsea's
• 0:29
  Speaker 4: advice and it didn't pan out. I started dating again
• 0:32
  Speaker 4: and met some interesting guys. This time around. I felt
• 0:35
  Speaker 4: like the ball was in my court and I had
• 0:36
  Speaker 4: the power. It took the pressure off of dating, and
• 0:39
  Speaker 4: I just decided I want to have fun with it.
• 0:41
  Speaker 4: One guy showed promise, but then unfortunately I started getting
• 0:43
  Speaker 4: the ick. I actually started things up again with the
• 0:46
  Speaker 4: guy I was sleeping with after a bunch of failed
• 0:47
  Speaker 4: attempts at dating again. Dating can get exhausting, and I'm
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: unfortunately impatient. I'm so hopeful that I'll meet the one,
• 0:54
  Speaker 4: but for now I'm just focusing on making money. Traveling
• 0:57
  Speaker 4: and having my friends with benefits. Thanks again for Carly.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: That was with the boss or what not?
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: With the boss. This was like a while ago.
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: She was like sleeping with a coworker and she was
• 1:06
  Speaker 4: getting the feelings they were like friends with benefits.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah right, and he wasn't out. Okay, okay, copy of that.
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: Well right, you have your answer, and now you're happier.
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: So I was right, yeah, like you got your information.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: You found out. Yes, that's good. This is progress. And
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: now she's enjoying her life.
• 1:20
  Speaker 4: I love this, like focusing on making money and traveling
• 1:23
  Speaker 4: and having fun with my.
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: Friend, having good amazing.
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: And also let's all just get out of the idea
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: of that there's one person out there for us.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Agree, it's just so silly.
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: That's impossible with there's nine billion people on the planet almost.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: Now, Like there are better people and worse people.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: I don't even know how many people are on the planet.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: That's a lot. It's too many.
• 1:41
  Speaker 3: It's too many, and there's not just one. There are
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: multiple people out there for you. So it's like if
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: it doesn't work out with what's not like you're meeting
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: your there's no such thing.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: I mean, like, yeah, I believe in you know, you can.
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: Have a connection with someone, but that can go for
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: your mother, your sister, your daughter, your dog, you know,
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: your neighbor. Like, there's a lot of soulmates versions out there,
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: so don't think of it as like there's one person.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: There's more than one person that you can match with.
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: Just like like you said, more than one dog, right, Yeah,
• 2:09
  Speaker 4: Mimsy turns ten tomorrow.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: By the way, Oh, happy early birthday.
• 2:12
  Speaker 4: I'm I'm like excited for her to have a birthday,
• 2:15
  Speaker 4: but I'm also like, please stay as young as possible,
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: as long as possible.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: Oh, you could just clone her, you know, it crosses
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: my mind. It crosses my mind. She's like she is
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: the dog.
• 2:24
  Speaker 4: I've always had very like a lot of anticipatory grief about,
• 2:27
  Speaker 4: like even since she was a baby.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: I'm like, never die with the other two.
• 2:31
  Speaker 4: I'm like, I love you, but you know, eventually the beer.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah exactly.
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: So Alexis wrote in and says, Dear Chelsea, my mom
• 2:40
  Speaker 4: has been in a bit of a dilemma for quite
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: some time. All of my mom's friends honestly suck their
• 2:46
  Speaker 4: total drains, and she has met women like this over
• 2:49
  Speaker 4: and over. It makes no sense because my mom is
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: a total badass, super fun, outgoing, loyal, and funny as hell.
• 2:56
  Speaker 4: I don't understand how crap women keep seeking out my
• 2:58
  Speaker 4: mother and befriending her. She's had friends become stalkers, single
• 3:02
  Speaker 4: white female type situations, or just trauma dump on her.
• 3:06
  Speaker 4: They never ask how she's doing. And Chelsea, it really
• 3:08
  Speaker 4: pisses me off. I wish you guys were friends. I
• 3:10
  Speaker 4: would love to do a video call with my mom
• 3:12
  Speaker 4: and gain advice on what to do moving forward. It
• 3:14
  Speaker 4: makes me sad my mom's best friend and all of
• 3:17
  Speaker 4: her friends are just a selfish af I have a
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: lovely group of girlfriends myself, so it makes me sad
• 3:21
  Speaker 4: that this is the hand my mom has been dealt.
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: Please help, Alexis Hi, Alexis we have mom too?
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: It is Shaka Hi.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: How are you good?
• 3:31
  Speaker 5: How are you?
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: I'm good? Thanks? Your mom is Shaka Khan?
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: Yes she is.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: That's great. I love a mother daughter duo dynamic. That's
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: my favorite.
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: And Shaka said they're best friends. She said, my daughter's
• 3:43
  Speaker 4: my best friend. I think that's very sweet.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: Yes, you are here. I am hi, Shaka Khan? How
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: are you good? How are you so?
• 3:52
  Speaker 5: Nice to meet you.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: You're so cute. Look at this two cutie pies.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: I love it.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: I love it. Your daughters, to all of your friends
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: or assholes.
• 4:02
  Speaker 5: They are, they've been pretty, they've been pretty crappy to
• 4:05
  Speaker 5: be honest.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: Really, what do you think the problem? What do you think, alexis?
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: What do you think the problem is?
• 4:11
  Speaker 6: I don't know if it's because like her personality is
• 4:14
  Speaker 6: so like magnetic in a way that people are jealous,
• 4:18
  Speaker 6: kind of like maybe they don't know who they are,
• 4:20
  Speaker 6: so they just cling on to her. Yeah, the same
• 4:23
  Speaker 6: way she is.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, Well people are attracted to like happy, positive people,
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: so that makes sense.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean it's a compliment, really, I know.
• 4:32
  Speaker 5: And you know, And here's what I'll say. A lot
• 4:34
  Speaker 5: of people say I should take it as a compliment,
• 4:36
  Speaker 5: and I do one hundred percent. I do, But at
• 4:39
  Speaker 5: some point it becomes violating.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Give me some examples.
• 4:44
  Speaker 5: So I had one gal and I knew her, she
• 4:47
  Speaker 5: was a family member by marriage, and she went crazy
• 4:51
  Speaker 5: on me and like bought my car, would drive by
• 4:54
  Speaker 5: my house in my car. I planned a trip to
• 4:58
  Speaker 5: go to Tula, Mexico. She bought her entire family a
• 5:01
  Speaker 5: trip to Tulam, including a female. It was severe. She
• 5:05
  Speaker 5: would drive by my house consistently. You know, I feared
• 5:08
  Speaker 5: going in my yard, so you know, at some point
• 5:11
  Speaker 5: I am worried for my safety.
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: To clarify something, did she buy the car from you
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: or she bought the same.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: Model of car you have? No, she just bought and.
• 5:22
  Speaker 5: She would leave me notes on what I can read
• 5:25
  Speaker 5: you one and it was pretty severe. She just said
• 5:29
  Speaker 5: because at some point I blocked her on every social
• 5:31
  Speaker 5: media account, I'm like, okay, I need to distance myself.
• 5:34
  Speaker 5: This is becoming unsafe. And then she started sending me
• 5:38
  Speaker 5: messages via Pinterest. She would call my god and she
• 5:43
  Speaker 5: would say things, you may have blocked me on every
• 5:46
  Speaker 5: social media platform, but if you don't think that I
• 5:49
  Speaker 5: know what you're doing, you're fucking delusional. I will spend
• 5:53
  Speaker 5: eternity plotting your just rewards. Ceunt.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: This doesn't sound like a friend.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: This sounds like that's a different level. That's a stalker,
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: psycho y.
• 6:04
  Speaker 5: She wouldn't let me go. She wouldn't let me go
• 6:06
  Speaker 5: like I tried to disconnect several times throughout our relationship,
• 6:10
  Speaker 5: and she sunk her teeth in deeper to me. So
• 6:13
  Speaker 5: you know at some point these women, I think that
• 6:15
  Speaker 5: they do have a love for me. In the beginning,
• 6:18
  Speaker 5: I think that they want to find the strength that
• 6:22
  Speaker 5: I maybe have. I'm pretty strong gal, and I'm very
• 6:25
  Speaker 5: much an individual, and so I don't think that these
• 6:28
  Speaker 5: women are and they are seeking that. But at some
• 6:31
  Speaker 5: point it becomes I'm no longer talking to them, I'm
• 6:35
  Speaker 5: talking to me. I don't even know what to say
• 6:37
  Speaker 5: next because they've taken the words like literally right out
• 6:41
  Speaker 5: of my mouth.
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: And is this situation because this is an extreme situation,
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: this has happened to multiple friends of yours that they
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: want to mimic your behavior and kind of emulate your
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: whole life.
• 6:52
  Speaker 5: It is, it is, and it's it's become to the
• 6:55
  Speaker 5: point now where when I meet a woman, I actually
• 6:57
  Speaker 5: will go right into that conversation to kind of feel.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Out, Yeah, that's smart.
• 7:03
  Speaker 5: If this is gonna happen again to me, I'm like,
• 7:06
  Speaker 5: this cannot be happening again and again Like this, there
• 7:09
  Speaker 5: is something that I'm maybe putting out there that I
• 7:13
  Speaker 5: don't know. I don't know that attracting this kind of
• 7:15
  Speaker 5: person over and over again, So.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: What do you say when you meet friends?
• 7:18
  Speaker 5: Now?
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: Like how do you explain this?
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: What do you say, like, Hey, listen, I get a
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: lot a lot of my friends turn into stalkers.
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: I have to make sure you're not fucking crazy.
• 7:26
  Speaker 7: Pretty much, pretty much, maybe in a little gentler way,
• 7:30
  Speaker 7: right right? Do I do just come right out and say, hey,
• 7:34
  Speaker 7: you know what, I've had some issues in the past,
• 7:36
  Speaker 7: you know, with women, And I don't necessarily, you know, hey,
• 7:39
  Speaker 7: are you one of these women? But I almost have
• 7:42
  Speaker 7: like a spidy sense for it now because it's happened
• 7:45
  Speaker 7: so frequently, so I'm super hyper sensitive to it, which
• 7:49
  Speaker 7: kind of deters me from wanting to move forward with
• 7:51
  Speaker 7: any women.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I understand what you mean. I think you probably are.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: First of all, do you trust.
• 7:57
  Speaker 3: Your judgment at this point to be able to kind
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: of suss out who is going to be like stable
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: and who's going to be unstable?
• 8:05
  Speaker 5: Absolutely. I'm fifty three now, so I feel like fifties
• 8:07
  Speaker 5: are a whole new ball game. Yeah, for mind, and
• 8:11
  Speaker 5: I do feel like I've got it pretty well dialed
• 8:13
  Speaker 5: where I can feel out if I'm going to be
• 8:17
  Speaker 5: a supply source to the right. So that's that's kind
• 8:21
  Speaker 5: of where I'm at now. But I know I need
• 8:23
  Speaker 5: women in my life. I know I need a good
• 8:25
  Speaker 5: group of women. I would love a good group of women,
• 8:28
  Speaker 5: like a posse.
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: You know, it feels like you should hang out with
• 8:31
  Speaker 3: your daughter and her friends. They sound more normal.
• 8:34
  Speaker 5: We'll be I do.
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: Okay, Well, that's good. Listen. I think you're on the
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: right track.
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: Like if identified the issue, you've made changes in how
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: you're approaching your friendships. Your daughter's aware, you're on the
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: same page. It's not like you and your daughter are
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: in conflict on this matter where she's saying one thing
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: and you're saying that that doesn't happen. You're admitting it's true.
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: It's a compliment that people are attracted to you. It's
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: a compliment that people want to like mimic your lifestyle
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: and emulate the way that you live.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: That's a compliment.
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: Obviously, you don't want people driving by your house and
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: copying everything you do. So it sounds like you're on
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: the case already. You just have to have a little
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: bit more discernment about who you let into your circle.
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: And that's great because you have to set up boundaries,
• 9:15
  Speaker 3: and like you said, when you're in your fifties, those
• 9:17
  Speaker 3: boundaries are much easier to set because it's not like
• 9:20
  Speaker 3: an option.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: It's almost like a mandate.
• 9:22
  Speaker 5: True true, very true, very true.
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: So I feel like between the two of you, guys,
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: you're on the case already and you're not going to
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: allow any more fruitcakes into your life. You know, like
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: you have to be very clear at the beginning, at
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: the outset which you just said, you were like, I'm
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: not dealing with any dependance.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: I don't need any more dependence.
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: I don't need anyone who's so interested in living my
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: life that they want to actually live my life.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: You know. I'm looking for.
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: Strong women that have strong boundaries of their own in place,
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: And those are the only types of relationships I'm looking for.
• 9:56
  Speaker 5: Are they out there?
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: Yes?
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: They are, of course they are. It's like discounting men.
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: You can't discount all men. You can only discount most
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: of them, you know what I mean? Yeah, like ninety percent.
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: But no, there are women out there that are like that.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: You know there are. You've had normal friends. Look at
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: your daughter, look at her friends. You're look at me.
• 10:15
  Speaker 3: Like, I have normal friends. I don't have psychos like
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: that in my life.
• 10:19
  Speaker 5: I mean, I do have one girlfriend that I absolutely
• 10:22
  Speaker 5: love her, name is Burnette, and she's been a solid
• 10:25
  Speaker 5: rock for sure. I mean she's a little crazy too,
• 10:27
  Speaker 5: but you know.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's okay. A little crazy is fine.
• 10:29
  Speaker 5: Cool crazy cool.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: And I just think, like, don't panic about it.
• 10:38
  Speaker 3: It's not like you need a gaggle of girlfriends, like
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: you need five girlfriends right away.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: It's not a fucking emergency.
• 10:43
  Speaker 5: I know, I know, but gosh, I just have had
• 10:46
  Speaker 5: really no solids, you know, and so I at some
• 10:49
  Speaker 5: point you just kind of lose some hope, I guess,
• 10:51
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: But it's like dating, you know what I mean, everyone
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: loses hope dating. They go on a website and the
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: like they go on five dates and they're like fucking
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: forget it. You know, everyone's disgusting or everyone's a loser,
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: or that everyone wants to split a check. Like you
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: have to treat it like dating, like you're going to
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: audition some new girlfriends in the next few months. There
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: are places at sites where, I mean, if you really
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: want to go and like meet friends on like friend websites,
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: you could do that, but I really don't think that's
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: necessary for you. It's sound like you're desperate, right And no,
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: by the way, let me just rephrase that. Anyone who's
• 11:20
  Speaker 3: on a site to meet friends, well, that is a
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: level tes friend. So sorry, I can't rephrase it. But
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: if you're on a dating site to meet guys, that
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: is not desperate. I understand that, and I support that
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: for all women. But if you're only in a situation
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: where you have to meet people online, then yeah, that's
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: like that's a different situation. You're not in that situation.
• 11:40
  Speaker 4: So one thing that might be helpful too is, rather
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: than going out for like individual women, if there's like
• 11:46
  Speaker 4: someone you know who has like say a book club
• 11:48
  Speaker 4: or like a friend group already where they all kind
• 11:51
  Speaker 4: of know each other and you can insert yourself, that
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: might be a nice way to like, they've all got
• 11:56
  Speaker 4: their stuff going on, they've all got their own lives
• 11:58
  Speaker 4: and their own relationships. Kind of like sneak on in
• 12:01
  Speaker 4: there and have some extra friends and like see if
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: there's somebody vibe with.
• 12:05
  Speaker 5: I recently did do that, and I'm kind of notorious
• 12:07
  Speaker 5: for calling people lovey, lovey or show people usually get
• 12:11
  Speaker 5: a pet name from me. So we go out to
• 12:13
  Speaker 5: dinner and all of a sudden, all these girls at
• 12:15
  Speaker 5: the table are calling each other lovey and I'm going,
• 12:17
  Speaker 5: what the hell's going on right now? So it's just weird,
• 12:20
  Speaker 5: you know, it's kind of weird behavior.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 12:23
  Speaker 5: I don't know what it is.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: You know, maybe I listen.
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: I am a strong personality, and I'm like, you know,
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: I have that vibe, right. I love to just latch
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: onto other groups of girls, like I'm always on the
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: periphery of lots of different friend groups because I don't
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: like to be too enmeshed in groups of women, Like
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: I have probably ten different groups of girlfriends, and I
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: go in and out when I please. I don't you know,
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: I'm not a jealous person, so I'm not worried that
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: I'm not the center of the universe. But I like
• 12:53
  Speaker 3: to be like I'll show up on a vacation, or
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: I'll show up at you know, their Thursday night dinner
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: that they do every week, and then I show up.
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: I like to be the kind of outsider of friend
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: groups because I like to float.
• 13:04
  Speaker 5: Around me too.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: So I think that's the attitude you should take.
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: You should find groups like what Catherine suggested, whether that
• 13:11
  Speaker 3: be a book club or whether you find existing groups
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: to just kind of float in and out of it
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: and if you see them, like you know, you can
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: you can gather enough information to know whether or not
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: it's a group you want to revisit or not.
• 13:22
  Speaker 5: For sure. Absolutely, that's absolutely right. Yes, yes, I agree
• 13:25
  Speaker 5: with that.
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: Says you're going to help her out with us.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 13:31
  Speaker 5: I think the universe knew I was gonna get some
• 13:32
  Speaker 5: dogshit women, and they gave me a daughter, you know.
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well that's good. So weird women stalking other women?
• 13:39
  Speaker 5: It is. And I was like, you know, if it
• 13:41
  Speaker 5: was I it was a guy, I'm like, yeah, you know,
• 13:43
  Speaker 5: I kind of wouldn't be like, oh right, this guy.
• 13:46
  Speaker 5: But it's women driving by me. I'm like, what do
• 13:48
  Speaker 5: you think you're gonna see me in my robe outside?
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: So weird word, I don't know.
• 13:56
  Speaker 5: It's just it's very bizarre behavior. And I don't know
• 13:58
  Speaker 5: what to do with those women either, Like how do
• 14:00
  Speaker 5: I manage that?
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: I can't?
• 14:01
  Speaker 5: You know, I feel anxiety. Am I gonna have to
• 14:05
  Speaker 5: be ready to rumble? Yeah?
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: I feel like you just have to ignore them unless
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: it does get to the point with this other woman
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: like that might be time for like a restraining order.
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean it's just a very weird pattern.
• 14:14
  Speaker 5: Like yeah, I mean, yeah, she's an administrator at a school.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: What do you think, Alexis, what do you think this
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: situation is?
• 14:22
  Speaker 6: I again, I think it's just her, unfortunately meeting people
• 14:26
  Speaker 6: that don't know who they are, and so then they
• 14:29
  Speaker 6: or they're unhappy in their lives and they see my
• 14:31
  Speaker 6: mom and she's just so you know, her personality is
• 14:35
  Speaker 6: very big.
• 14:36
  Speaker 5: We're kind of opposite that way. I'm a little more quiet.
• 14:38
  Speaker 6: But I think they're just really like attracted to that,
• 14:42
  Speaker 6: and they don't they just cling on and want to
• 14:45
  Speaker 6: do that. They start just like wearing the same clothes,
• 14:48
  Speaker 6: doing their hair the same like all of a sudden,
• 14:50
  Speaker 6: they've never done that before. And at first I thought
• 14:53
  Speaker 6: it was a compliment. And then the more times I
• 14:55
  Speaker 6: noticed this is happening, I'm like, Okay, something is up,
• 14:59
  Speaker 6: Like this is.
• 14:59
  Speaker 5: Not normal behavior.
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: Oh that's so strange. Yeah, some people are a little
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: bit that way.
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: Like I have one of those faces where people come
• 15:06
  Speaker 4: up to me at the grocery store and like tell
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: me their life story.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: So, I mean, some people just have like a certain
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: vibe and it's not anything I don't think that you
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: can control, you know.
• 15:15
  Speaker 5: I know, and I know and then I think, you know,
• 15:17
  Speaker 5: do I need to be you know less, do I
• 15:19
  Speaker 5: need to like, you know, be I don't know. I
• 15:22
  Speaker 5: don't know. But at some point now in my fifties, though,
• 15:24
  Speaker 5: I will say I'm embracing who I am and I
• 15:26
  Speaker 5: don't give two shits about what people are thinking or doing.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying, I mean, you're embracing who you are.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: You shouldn't change who you are.
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: You should just be like what we've already discussed, which
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: is more discerning about letting people get close to you.
• 15:38
  Speaker 3: You have to figure out who's crazy and who's not crazy,
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: and then make those decisions. Don't start, don't go all
• 15:44
  Speaker 3: in right away.
• 15:45
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I agree, I do that.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: I do that.
• 15:48
  Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, I love this person, and then three
• 15:50
  Speaker 3: days later I'm like, never mind.
• 15:52
  Speaker 4: I think you just have to detach a little bit
• 15:54
  Speaker 4: from what their expectations of the friendship are and like
• 15:58
  Speaker 4: if it doesn't.
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: Feel good for you, then it doesn't.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: It's not good, and you don't have to.
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: Take that on like if they are feeling.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, just yeah, I think we've covered it. I
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: think you guys got the message.
• 16:07
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, all right, guys.
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: Okay, okay, ladies. Thank you for calling in.
• 16:13
  Speaker 5: Hey, thank you so much.
• 16:14
  Speaker 4: Un thanks bye.
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: Okay, well that's a wrap up. Our little minisod a
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: couple's counseling. Okay, well, well that's I don't know what
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: to say now, goodbye, We'll.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: See you next time.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: Goodbye. So I added a couple of new dates. I'm
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: not on tour yet, but I added a.
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: Couple of dates just because I felt like we need
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: a little bit more laughter and a little bit more
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: medicine for the end of the year. And I was
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: wrapping things up, but I thought, maybe let me do
• 16:38
  Speaker 3: a couple more. So I'm adding three more dates in
• 16:40
  Speaker 3: addition to my Vegas residency.
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: I'm headlining the Rochester.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: Fringe Comedy Festival September thirteenth, and I will be in
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: Napa on.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: October third, So those will be my last.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: Dates of the year. Do you want advice from Chelsea?
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: Right into Dear Chelsea Podcast at gmail dot com. Find
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: full video episode of Dear Chelsea on YouTube by searching
• 17:02
  Speaker 4: at Dear Chelsea Pod. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: by Brad Dickert executive producer Katherine law And be sure
• 17:09
  Speaker 4: to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot com.