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Rules for Sons · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Sit down some There's something I'd like to talk to
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: you about. Actually thirty two things i'd like to talk
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: to you about. It's one more thing.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: I always like it when you do a tease and
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: I haven't got the slightest idea what we're about to
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: talk about. It's exciting is.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: That, first of all, this may be my last. This
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: will be my last one More Thing podcast until the
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: July maybe ever if I decide to defect to Alaska
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: and become an Alaska.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: If you're eaten by a polar bear, my parents got
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: chased by a polar bear when they went there. When
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: when I sent him to Alaska for my mom's sixty
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: oh oh, chased by a damn. I got them a
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: cruise to Alaska and they cruised around and everything like that,
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: and then they went they added some other stuff on there.
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: They took a helicopter up to Barrel Way up North
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: oh and they are walking around in this tiny little
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  Speaker 2: town full of drunk eskimos. According to my dad and
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: I had a polar bear came out and the guide
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: was like, we need to back to the bus, and
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: so they all like hustle back to the bus because
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: they apparently you don't mess around with the bowler Bears.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I wish we had time to do some of
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: those extra things that we're doing. A cruise up and
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: down the coast from Vancouver way up into Alaskan back,
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: and that was long enough for our lifestyles right now.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I could absolutely see going back. I don't
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  Speaker 1: know if you've ever looked at a map, Alaska is very,
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  Speaker 1: very large.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah. The one thing I'm sure you'll be doing is
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: drinking a drink with ice cubes that are fifty thousand
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: years old or whatever. I guess that's a filing.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: The respect I deserve. Yeah, yeah, great, super, Okay, it's
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: a good gimmu. Yeah, it should be nice. I'm really
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: looking forward to it, and I'm blessed that we still
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: enjoy each other's company as much as we do. So
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: the thirty two things that I mentioned are rules for suns,
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: and I love this. I mean, print this, I'm gonna
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna retweet it, spread it, sons correct. Yeah, yes, suns.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: Su ns have their own rules.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: Nine billion years right exactly.
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  Speaker 1: Rule number one, create heat and light through fusion. Rule
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: number two see rule number one. So these are good.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: We can you know, raise a hand if anybody wants
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: to jump in and dwell on one of them, or
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: we can just keep moving. But a lot of these
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: are really really great. Number one, never shake a man's
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: hand sitting down. That was interesting, fairly minor point, but
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: it's a good one.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, get up. Yeah. I don't think I's ever taught that,
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: but I think it came to me at some point.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: It's funny because some of these are like, it's like
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: a scale of one of five. Some of them are fives, like,
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: by god, every man should know this, and every young
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: man should know this, and if you weren't taught it,
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: it's an indictable offense. That's like your fives down to
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: the ones like what really? And number two would be
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: one of those. I don't enter a pool by the stairs?
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: What really? Jump in? Wow?
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: Is there a never play a poker with a guy
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: named Doc? Is there one of those?
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: That's a good one. Number three the man at the
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: barbecue grill is the closest thing to a king. He
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: is in charge. That's right. Four In a negotiation, never
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: make the first offer. I've not read that for years
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: and years and years. Five request the late checkout It's funny.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: My wife always acts like I've asked, may I have
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: sex with your daughter?
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  Speaker 2: I'm that way. I feel like it's really I'm really
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: putting them out. Even I've had other people at I
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: just I can't.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: I just feel like I shouldn't.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: We had an agreements. Check out his ten. When I
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: got the key, you told me I can't make up
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  Speaker 2: ruled new rules.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: Now I ask for it all the time. Number six.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: When entrusted with a secret, keep it. That's the that's
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  Speaker 1: at level five. Absolutely uh. Seven Hold your heroes to
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  Speaker 1: a higher standard. That's a good one. Just because you
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  Speaker 1: they're your heroes doesn't mean let them slide because you
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  Speaker 1: know they're No. If they're deserving your hero of being
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  Speaker 1: your hero, they should clear a high bar. Let's see Eight.
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  Speaker 1: Return a borrowed car with a tank full of gas,
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  Speaker 1: a full tank of gas. That is a good one.
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  Speaker 1: I've always done that. Eight. Oh I'm sorry. Nine play
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: with passion or not at all. Church rec leagues may
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: be less so you know Friday beer leagues co ed.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: But yeah, when shaking hands, grip firmly and look them
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  Speaker 1: in the eye again, that's that's a level fiver and
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: I know young men who don't, and I'm like, i'd
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: really like to talk to your dad. This is an
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  Speaker 1: old expression, but a good one. Don't let a wishbone
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: grow where a backbone should be. Don't be wishing, do
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  Speaker 1: the work. I like this one. If you need music
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: on the beach, you're missing the point. Yeah, I've thought
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: that way before. Camping out in the woods and people
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: bring like some sort of cool music system, and I'm like, yeah,
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  Speaker 1: I get it, but I also kind of like just
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: the quiet of the the woods. Yeah, I think you've
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: missed the point. They've missed the point, and camping is
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: a really good example of that. I agree one hundred percent.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: A lot of guys have tunes in their golf carts
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: these days. If you play golf, a lot of people
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: are listening to music. You mentioned that the other day,
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: and I, like a lot of my good friends, I
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: liked the quiet of the golf course back in the day,
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: which I suppose doesn't exist anymore. I well, you're not
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  Speaker 1: allowed to have it loud really at any golf course,
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: and like your better course, No, it's got to be
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: if you can hear it across the fairway. It's too loud.
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  Speaker 2: But even in my own foursome, I don't. I think
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: I'd prefer not to have it at all.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: But oh no, I don't want it at all, but
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  Speaker 1: the majority of my friends do, so I just go
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  Speaker 1: along with it. I've gotten used to it. But it's
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: just I'm out there to hear the rustle of the
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: wind in the trees and the birds making noise, and
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  Speaker 1: you know the sound of the club hitting the ball,
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  Speaker 1: and it makes it harder to communicate to everybody. You've
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: got to like yell above their music. Did you get
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: a five there? What did you get a five there?
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: What do you think? That's still ridiculous? You're in the woods,
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: you're escaping the hubbub of life to go into the woods,
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: and you bring the noise of back where you live.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: I don't know, And I try really hard not to
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: be judgmental about this, which.
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: Is marshally judgmental news for me.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's a side of me if you have
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  Speaker 1: seen ah ah. And it's hard to even describe this
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  Speaker 1: without sounding judgmental. I don't at all have the need
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: for constant background music. I don't I don't need it,
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  Speaker 1: I don't want it. I find it distracting, and what's
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: what's the point. Are you bored? Do you not like life?
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  Speaker 1: Do you need to be entertained? Is this not entertaining enough?
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  Speaker 1: I just I don't get it.
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  Speaker 2: I was never having the TV on unless I was
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  Speaker 2: watching a specific show, as opposed to I've known lots
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  Speaker 2: of people back when I used to enter other people's
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  Speaker 2: homes in them mine. I haven't been in another person's
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  Speaker 2: home nor them in mine in a very, very very
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  Speaker 2: long time.
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  Speaker 1: It's safest.
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  Speaker 2: But people who had just the TV was always on,
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  Speaker 2: just kind of as a background noise.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I hate that, but you know, teach their own.
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  Speaker 2: Uh.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: This one's kind of old time, but I like it.
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  Speaker 1: Carry two hen kerchiefs. The one in your back pocket
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  Speaker 1: is for you, the one in your breast pocket is
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  Speaker 1: for her moving along.
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  Speaker 2: Wait, that's a different era.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, you marry the girl, you marry her family two
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  Speaker 1: x to a large extent. Yeah yeah. Uh. Number fifteen
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: is a classic. Be like a duck, remained calm on
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  Speaker 1: the surface and paddle like crazy underneath. Sixteen. You'll love
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: this one. Jack. Experience the serenity of traveling alone.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I've done a lot of that.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, I've done some of it.
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  Speaker 2: It's pretty awesome and I do enjoy it.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, although.
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  Speaker 2: There's definitely been I've definitely traveled alone and done stuff
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  Speaker 2: where I thought, ah, it's really a shame. Yeah. So
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  Speaker 2: and so, whether it's my kids or a romantic companion
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  Speaker 2: of any kind, is not enjoying this also, right right, Oh.
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  Speaker 1: Let's see, never be afraid to ask out the best
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  Speaker 1: looking girl in the room. I wish there rules for sons.
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  Speaker 2: I wish I'd have lived that one when I was younger. Yeah,
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  Speaker 2: I don't have any real regrets in life because I'm
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: happy with where things have ended up. And you know,
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: you change one thing and everything could change.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: Time machine stepping on an ant Yep, we've all seen
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: the movie.
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  Speaker 2: But I do wish er a couple of girls in
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  Speaker 2: high school that looking back on it, they clearly liked
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  Speaker 2: me in the way that I liked them, and I
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  Speaker 2: just never made the move. And it just horrifies me.
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  Speaker 2: But you know, you don't know, I think, you know,
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  Speaker 2: we could have met, fall in love, had kids. I'd
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: still be in that town the rest of my life.
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  Speaker 2: I also could be perfectly happy with that, you don't know.
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  Speaker 1: Right right, right, Yeah, there there's like a couple of
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  Speaker 1: reunion type things I went to where girls who I
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: thought were just cute he said, oh my god, I
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: had such a crush on you. And I'm like what,
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: But I put that down to my own cluelessness, not
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: lack of confidence, total inability to pick up on signals.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: There's a couple of examples. But then one where we
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: would once a year do the I think they called
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: it morph Day or something like that. Anyway, it was
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: a backwards day where girls ask out the boys, oh
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: righteous shows you how old I am?
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: Sadie Hawkins dance. They used to call it went back
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: then day.
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  Speaker 2: They didn't in mynd school, but whatever, it was that concept.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: And this girl asked me out, and we went out
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: and had a good time, and she was super attractive
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: and like obviously she know she would have liked a
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: follow up of how about Friday? We do so mcginner
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: and I didn't. I didn't yet, I know, I know,
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: And she ended up dating a friend of mine. I
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: was like what what?
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: I too have few regrets. But there was a girl
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: who was a year older than me and just pretty
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: and smart, and she came back for homecoming and said
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: we should go to the whatever together and a party,
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, yeah, okay, great, and I got hammered,
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: just got hammered, and I was useless. I was and
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: she fled. Yeah stupid idiot.
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: Russian ride that I thought of.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, yeah, she's so pretty. So let me expand
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: on that one briefly. Never be afraid to ask out
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: the best looking girl in the room, and when she
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: laughs at you, never be afraid to say, she's probably
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: a lesbian.
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: It's funny.
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: The next one, never turned down a breath mint speaks
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: for itself. I don't need to bring one of these
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: on our cruise, but I am because it's a nice cruise.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: A sport coat is worth a thousand words.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: I don't know if that's still true or not.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: I don't either, but I often rather be the guy
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: who's boy, he's a little fancy tonight than the only
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: guy not well.
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: I think in the modern world, especially in California, you're
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: the dork who wears the sport coat, and I'm off
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: in that person, cause cool guys wear like cool casual clothes.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: We got a bunch more so let's keep moving. Number twenty,
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: Try your own eulogy never stop revising. Oh that's a
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: big one. I'll let you got to play.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: You disappointed so many people.
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: Number twenty one Thank a veteran. Then make it up
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: to him. Ooh, saving private Ryan, Make it worth it,
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: Make the country worth the sacrifice. Think about that as
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: we approach our two hundred and fiftieth birthday. Yeah. Yeah.
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: Number twenty two, I love this one. It brings a
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: tear to my eye. Eat lunch with the new kid.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, reach out to that obviously lonely.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: You're doing it of your own free will. I'll never
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: forget one school. I was a new kid at a
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: lot of every schools. One school I went to, the
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: teachers made people sit with me, and I knew they
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: were making him sit with me, And that was worse
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: than sitting alone, knowing the people had been forced against
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: their will to sit with me.
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: Oh, after writing an angry email, read it careful, then
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: delete it. Certainly, don't hit send. If sending it is
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: a good idea today, it'll still be a good idea tomorrow.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: I've lived by those words and it has helped me.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: Number twenty four. Ask your mom to play. She won't
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: let you win.
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: That's funny.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: That is pretty funny.
• 13:18
  Speaker 2: Moms or is it women in general or moms, But no,
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: moms don't do that. They'll cross you and scrabble. Right,
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: you're a child, Yeah, get better at it. Yeah, my
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: mom did. Yeah.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: Number twenty five manners maketh the man twenty six give credit,
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: take the blame. That's good. I wish i'd learned that
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: better and earlier. I've thought about that a lot. It's
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: funny my daughter, who's doing really, really well and soon
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: to be a legal eagle, she will go to her employer,
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: she's doing internships right now, and she will say, I'm
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: looking back on this, I think I screwed it up.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: Here's what I did, as opposed to well I didn't know,
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: or you know, or well that's what somebody told me.
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: She's like the opposite of that. Where'd you get that? Kid?
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: Anyway, I work on that with my kids a lot.
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: Don't blame somebody for this. This was your doing right right.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: And you know, I've told this story more than once.
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: I observed it on the submarine that my brother was
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: the executive officer on a guy screwed up and he
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: said to the whole team, all right, what went wrong?
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: And how do we fix it? And everybody says, I
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: thought it was this, and it turns out to be that,
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: like one hundred percent accountability, and I thought, wow, that's
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: what that looks like, because otherwise, you know, there are
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: hundreds of lives at stake and billions of dollars. So
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: I thought that was cool. Give credit, take the blame.
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: Twenty seven Stand up to bullies and protect those bullied
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: came into that. Twenty eight Write down your dreams. Do
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: they mean like the things your brain was doing while
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: you slept, or like.
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: A dog was chasing me and I couldn't run like
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: those kind of dreams?
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: Or do they mean some day I'd like to volunteer
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: and help troubled youth, or you know, someday I'd like
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: to retire to Florida. It doesn't make it.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: Some way, I'd like to raise money for those who
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: can't run from dogs, the inexplicably dead legged let's see
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: twenty nine. Always protect your siblings and your teammates.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Thirty be confident and humble at the same time. Again,
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: that's your level five. Confident and humble because the two
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: are absolutely compatible. Thirty one call and visit your parents
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: off and they miss you.
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: That brings a tear.
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: And finally, thirty two, I was at that. You know,
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: I'm better at it. Yeah, I have some regrets, but
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: and I let my kids get away with a text
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: on Father's Day, two of them. M hmm, maybe I'll
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: guilt them for a while. Thirty two. Guilt your children
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: when they disappoint you. No, thirty two is the healthiest
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: relationships are those where you're a team, where you respect,
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: protect and stand up for each other. That's good. That's
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: good stuff. Those are I'm reposting now. These are your
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: rules for sons.
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: That's pretty good.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: Do you like that? Yeah, that's a if you want
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: that list. We just retweeted it at the Armstrong and
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: Getty Twitter account and I don't know, maybe Hanson can
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: put a link in hot links Armstrong and Geddy dot com.
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: Never played poker with a guy named Doc was another
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: one of those ridiculous subs of things.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: I know, those that don't piss into the wind, and
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: it's kind of different, it's practical.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: Oh geez.
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, don't don't play pool with a guy named
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: Fats anything Fats.
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: Number thirty three never talk fuckers, shake hands out of
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: urnal m Yeah, and.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: Talk at the urinals A good one.
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: Mind your business, Well, I guess that's it.
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: Or always say water's cold and deep.