Latest / It's Mom O'Clock / Episode 20: “Looking for My Mom Soulmate”

Transcript

Episode 20: “Looking for My Mom Soulmate” · It's Mom O'Clock

• 0:01
  Speaker A: Hello.
• 0:02
  Speaker B: You guys, stop. Is it Mama Clock yet? I'm going crazy.
• 0:07
  Speaker A: Heck yeah, it's Mama Clock somewhere.
• 0:30
  Speaker B: Oh, episode 20.
• 0:33
  Speaker A: I can't believe we're at episode 20. I dreamed of this day. I can't believe 20 episodes in is crazy.
• 0:41
  Speaker B: I think we have a line of you saying that every time episode three is crazy.
• 0:48
  Speaker A: Okay, we'll put that as a tagline on a sweatshirt. Okay, you know what's crazy? What?
• 0:52
  Speaker B: Your husband leaving for work and making me an espresso martini in the refrigerator.
• 0:57
  Speaker A: You know what's even crazier? It was my idea. Idea.
• 0:59
  Speaker B: You're the best.
• 1:00
  Speaker A: I literally said Michael's like, dude, am I missing something? Like, is there anything else I need to do? I was like, make Emelina's present martini and put it in the fridge.
• 1:06
  Speaker B: Thanks, hun. This one's for you. I miss you by the way.
• 1:08
  Speaker A: Also, mind you, it's a Tuesday and it's 11:00am it doesn't count. It does not count.
• 1:13
  Speaker B: It's needed.
• 1:14
  Speaker A: Yeah, and actually that actually looks delicious.
• 1:16
  Speaker B: This is like frothy and good.
• 1:18
  Speaker A: Well, you know why? Cuz you put it in the fridge.
• 1:20
  Speaker B: Everyone get yourself an espresso martini right now. It doesn't matter what time it is.
• 1:23
  Speaker A: Doesn't matter.
• 1:24
  Speaker B: This is delicious. This is dessert.
• 1:25
  Speaker A: I'm so happy for you. Well, welcome back your two favorite girlies, Emily and Dom.
• 1:31
  Speaker B: It's Mama Clock.
• 1:34
  Speaker A: I can't believe we're here. Episode 20. I have a few things to say to our listeners though.
• 1:39
  Speaker B: Say it and be mean.
• 1:41
  Speaker A: I don't want to be mean today. It's Tuesday. Okay?
• 1:43
  Speaker B: Be nice.
• 1:44
  Speaker A: I had another rough week. Was it the same week?
• 1:47
  Speaker B: I have no idea. What day is it?
• 1:48
  Speaker A: Day is it? Okay, so what I have to say is, please, for the love of G O D G O D buy some merch.
• 2:00
  Speaker B: I'm wearing the coziest sweatshirt right now.
• 2:02
  Speaker A: Look how cute this sweatshirt is.
• 2:04
  Speaker B: I'm cute and cozy and comfy.
• 2:05
  Speaker A: Cute and cozy. Fall's coming, winter's coming.
• 2:08
  Speaker B: Sweatshirt season.
• 2:09
  Speaker A: Sweatshirt season.
• 2:10
  Speaker B: Throw it on with leggings, jeans, whatever you want.
• 2:12
  Speaker A: Yeah, and look how cute and stylish you still look. We have hats on display. Okay, I know bucket hats are like summer vibes, but still, if you're going on vacation.
• 2:19
  Speaker B: But this is cute for like a soccer mom going and soccer mom.
• 2:22
  Speaker A: Or drop off.
• 2:24
  Speaker B: Drop off your face mom.
• 2:26
  Speaker A: We sell it in black, jean and pink. We have a cute clear bag that I want to show but I didn't know where to hang it.
• 2:33
  Speaker B: Oh, where'd it go.
• 2:34
  Speaker A: I just put it over there.
• 2:35
  Speaker B: Oh, it's really cute.
• 2:36
  Speaker A: It's really cute. And there's so many other fun things. Also would love some feedback. If you're looking for something, we'll be more than happy to throw it on the website, so let us know. But please buy our merch. We. We're. We're cute moms trying to naked.
• 2:51
  Speaker B: We don't. I need my own.
• 2:54
  Speaker A: I need my money. Because last night my husband goes, so you bought skims yesterday.
• 3:00
  Speaker B: I can't.
• 3:01
  Speaker A: Yeah, and what about it? I'm cold.
• 3:04
  Speaker B: Your husband's better than mine. Mine.
• 3:06
  Speaker A: He scares me.
• 3:07
  Speaker B: No, he's scared.
• 3:08
  Speaker A: He's so scared. I would have to open up a secret credit card. And we don't want to hide things from our husbands.
• 3:13
  Speaker B: No, I want to be truthful.
• 3:14
  Speaker A: He gets notifications every time I buy something, and now I'm stressed.
• 3:17
  Speaker B: But I also don't want to just take out cash at the target line.
• 3:20
  Speaker A: People are like, she's hiding cash back.
• 3:23
  Speaker B: Yes, I want cash back.
• 3:25
  Speaker A: So anyway, please buy our merch. We would appreciate it so, so much. Was there something else I had to say?
• 3:30
  Speaker B: I am really jealous of working moms when you have, like, your own.
• 3:33
  Speaker A: I mean, I miss it. I absolutely miss having my own mom.
• 3:36
  Speaker B: Yeah. You knew it.
• 3:36
  Speaker A: It was so nice.
• 3:37
  Speaker B: I never had it.
• 3:38
  Speaker A: Yeah, it's nice.
• 3:39
  Speaker B: I need, like, a sugar.
• 3:40
  Speaker A: I was like when he got, like.
• 3:41
  Speaker B: A secret sugar daddy, but not sex.
• 3:43
  Speaker A: I mean, I get messages all the time. I'll say yes.
• 3:45
  Speaker B: All right. I'll send feet pics saying, you don't want my feet.
• 3:47
  Speaker A: But last night when my husband said that to me, I almost said, well, then I'm gonna get a job. And then you're gonna have to hire somebody to watch Gio and the dog. And that's it. I'm leaving. I quit.
• 3:57
  Speaker B: Bye.
• 3:58
  Speaker A: Peace.
• 3:58
  Speaker B: Peace.
• 3:59
  Speaker A: What was the other thing I had to say, Merch? I said something else.
• 4:06
  Speaker B: What? Can't think. Tell me how much you love me.
• 4:11
  Speaker A: Yeah. So much. Oh, go ahead, Bama. Go under.
• 4:14
  Speaker B: Go hide.
• 4:15
  Speaker A: My dog is so stressed out with my son, I can't. My son beats the living shit out of him.
• 4:20
  Speaker B: I'm really enjoying this.
• 4:21
  Speaker A: Good. You enjoy that. Let's start our episode because I have no idea what we're talking about. No, there was something else I needed to mention.
• 4:31
  Speaker B: I don't know.
• 4:32
  Speaker A: I said, merch. Don't let me forget to talk about merch.
• 4:35
  Speaker B: What else did hun tell us to do? Anything.
• 4:38
  Speaker A: Well, you have a story to tell so why don't you start with that? Oh, something about it, you being in the bedroom and thinking about me.
• 4:45
  Speaker B: Oh.
• 4:46
  Speaker A: Which is absolutely on brand. Which is absolutely cuckoo birds. Which is absolutely. I would not expect anything else. It's so bad.
• 4:56
  Speaker B: So I was having sex with my husband.
• 4:59
  Speaker A: People just end it there. Because that right there just says, am.
• 5:04
  Speaker B: I allowed to do that? Am I allowed to have sex with my husband?
• 5:07
  Speaker A: I'm not sure.
• 5:07
  Speaker B: I know. But you know what?
• 5:09
  Speaker A: Freaking out. People are freaking out.
• 5:11
  Speaker B: Sorry, dad. Your daughter fucks.
• 5:14
  Speaker A: I'm now freaking out. Now I'm freaking out.
• 5:16
  Speaker B: Okay, anyway, so we were doing that, right? Just like, very standard sex at this time.
• 5:21
  Speaker A: I don't know what that means. Can you elaborate?
• 5:23
  Speaker B: You know, for this story? I'm talking straight missionary.
• 5:28
  Speaker A: Okay.
• 5:28
  Speaker B: Okay.
• 5:29
  Speaker A: Picturing it.
• 5:30
  Speaker B: Picturing. Don't picture it. I'm on top, though. Is that so? Do you like Vayanta? Yeah, I like Van Ta.
• 5:35
  Speaker A: Me too.
• 5:36
  Speaker B: Yeah. And just, like, came across my mind. I was like, oh, my God, you could. You're home from work. You can have lunch with me at Dom today. I just said it out loud.
• 5:46
  Speaker A: While you were having sex with your husband.
• 5:48
  Speaker B: It just, like popped in my mind. I just said Dom. And he was like, can we not do this right now? I was like, no, but, like, you're home and we can have. We can have lunch. And he was like, wait, what stage.
• 5:59
  Speaker A: In intercourse were you at? What stage? Like, were you like.
• 6:03
  Speaker B: No, we were just, like, just starting.
• 6:05
  Speaker A: But, like, I'm freaking out. Was he like, why the. Are you talking about Dom?
• 6:11
  Speaker B: Yeah. Then he's like, okay, now I'm thinking about Dom. I'm like, well, I'm thinking about Domin. Then we both come.
• 6:17
  Speaker A: Not the both of you thinking about me. I can't with that.
• 6:22
  Speaker B: I know, but do you ever sometimes, like, your mind is just somewhere else and then you, like, talk about it?
• 6:25
  Speaker A: Yes, but I don't think I've ever said it out loud.
• 6:27
  Speaker B: Oh, no, but I do. And then he's like, okay, let's. Let's get back into this. Let's.
• 6:31
  Speaker A: So he was like, now? No, Dom.
• 6:35
  Speaker B: Yes, Dom.
• 6:36
  Speaker A: No. So now you guys are both thinking about me.
• 6:38
  Speaker B: And you probably love that.
• 6:40
  Speaker A: I do. I do. That's hilarious.
• 6:44
  Speaker B: Yeah, it was really funny. But then I was like, oh, my God. And then. And then, like, now they were talking. Oh, now I have to tell Dom about this. He's like, you're a psychopath.
• 6:52
  Speaker A: He's like, shut the up.
• 6:53
  Speaker B: I'm trying to come.
• 6:55
  Speaker A: No, that is so Hilarious.
• 6:56
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 6:57
  Speaker A: Thanks for thinking about me.
• 6:58
  Speaker B: You're welcome. Anytime, every time. All the time.
• 7:02
  Speaker A: This was like in the morning too, nonetheless.
• 7:04
  Speaker B: In the morning. Yeah. This is so you think about me.
• 7:06
  Speaker A: As soon as you wake up is what you're saying.
• 7:08
  Speaker B: Absolutely.
• 7:10
  Speaker A: Anyway, back to regular programming. We're talking about moms today. We're talking about looking for our mom soulmate.
• 7:19
  Speaker B: Mom soulmate?
• 7:20
  Speaker A: What does that mean?
• 7:21
  Speaker B: Like, where is the mom that I dreamt of my whole life?
• 7:25
  Speaker A: Yeah. Like the friend that you need that's a mom.
• 7:28
  Speaker B: Does she exist?
• 7:29
  Speaker A: Do you have her already? Or are you looking for her? Or is she non existent?
• 7:35
  Speaker B: Or are we even trying to find that? Like, do we have the energy to find a good mom friend?
• 7:40
  Speaker A: I don't know if we do.
• 7:41
  Speaker B: If it just like comes into my lap, like, that would be ideal.
• 7:44
  Speaker A: You are like. I feel like you're at a stage.
• 7:46
  Speaker B: Where I'm starting to meet moms, meet moms. You're still.
• 7:50
  Speaker A: Do you like that?
• 7:51
  Speaker B: Eating eggs in the corner.
• 7:53
  Speaker A: I'm eating egg sandwiches again. Do you like that you're at the stage of meeting new moms?
• 7:58
  Speaker B: I like it, but I also feel like I haven't found my, my clique.
• 8:02
  Speaker A: Are you upset?
• 8:03
  Speaker B: I'm not upset.
• 8:04
  Speaker A: Okay. But I.
• 8:05
  Speaker B: But I definitely want, like, I see the moms out there that are like together doing playdates, like, hanging out at soccer. Like, like, I want that. I definitely want that. But also, like, I don't want to have to work hard for it. I want it to just come to me.
• 8:19
  Speaker A: I don't want that either. That's why I'm very, like, intuitive. I feel when things are going to be a good friendship or not.
• 8:26
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 8:26
  Speaker A: And like, I don't, I don't know.
• 8:28
  Speaker B: Like, I don't want to force it. I want, I want our kids to like, I. Ideally I would want somebody who, like, this is. Do you want to know my ideal?
• 8:36
  Speaker A: Yeah, tell me, Tell me.
• 8:38
  Speaker B: I thought about this. I want a mom who has four kids.
• 8:41
  Speaker A: Okay.
• 8:42
  Speaker B: So crazier than you, crazier than me.
• 8:44
  Speaker A: But has a worse life. So misery loves company. So go ahead.
• 8:46
  Speaker B: No. Has four kids, but one of her kids is like older. Like a little older.
• 8:50
  Speaker A: Can watch the kids.
• 8:51
  Speaker B: They could watch. Look out for the kids while me and the mom are having margaritas on my deck.
• 8:56
  Speaker A: Love that.
• 8:56
  Speaker B: And everybody's just like, or drinker. A drinker. I need a drinker. If you're not, if you're not a drinker, I'm not really interested.
• 9:03
  Speaker A: Do you hate me?
• 9:05
  Speaker B: No. I'm Just kidding. I, I. But, like, this is my ideal.
• 9:08
  Speaker A: Like, okay, but what am I.
• 9:10
  Speaker B: You're, you're cool.
• 9:12
  Speaker A: I'm always just cool. I can't. Okay, proceed, drinker. Chaotic. Go ahead.
• 9:19
  Speaker B: Like type B. Like, not type A.
• 9:22
  Speaker A: Okay.
• 9:23
  Speaker B: Not judging me. Like, okay, love that. And I want them to, like, open up and, like, talk to me about hard times. Hard times. Like, I don't want, like, a surface level. Like, if I'm gonna actually be like, a good.
• 9:33
  Speaker A: We'll have problems here.
• 9:34
  Speaker B: Yeah. Like, I want to talk about your problems. I want to know you, I want to know about your husband. Like, I want, I want us to talk.
• 9:40
  Speaker A: Like, he's not making you come anymore, right?
• 9:42
  Speaker B: Like, I want to, I want to know that. Talk about sex. Talk about. I want them to be able to open up to me about their friend group. Like, I want, I just want to be open.
• 9:50
  Speaker A: Do you want that friend to introduce you to their friends?
• 9:52
  Speaker B: Like, are you that vibe if they think, oh, I have somebody that I think you'll really get along with. Sure, introduce me.
• 9:58
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 9:59
  Speaker B: And if I'm taking notes for you. Yeah.
• 10:02
  Speaker A: Okay.
• 10:03
  Speaker B: But I want our kids to get along like, I want.
• 10:05
  Speaker A: Is that the most important thing for you, or would you rather you get along? Like, what would you rather?
• 10:10
  Speaker B: I mean, obviously everybody wants both questions. I mean, both is like, we're talking about, like, dream scenario. But I guess I'd rather get along with the mom. Right. Because our kids are like, I feel like the kids are.
• 10:21
  Speaker A: You just make it happen.
• 10:22
  Speaker B: Yeah, make it happen.
• 10:23
  Speaker A: It's like, where are you meeting this person?
• 10:24
  Speaker B: I don't know. Well, so I'm just starting the stage, right. Because my, my son is in kindergarten, but he's at a very small private school.
• 10:31
  Speaker A: So what are the options here?
• 10:32
  Speaker B: The options are not great.
• 10:34
  Speaker A: So you have drop off.
• 10:35
  Speaker B: Yeah, drop off, pick up.
• 10:37
  Speaker A: But also, like, invitations, like, invite me to parties or like, kid party. Your kid party. Or also.
• 10:42
  Speaker B: Well, I think what's, what really starts with the mom friends is sports. Okay.
• 10:47
  Speaker A: Soccer.
• 10:48
  Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, he's starting soccer this week, so maybe I'll make it.
• 10:51
  Speaker A: I feel like it's so hard to make friends at this stage.
• 10:53
  Speaker B: It is.
• 10:54
  Speaker A: It's hard unless you're, like, meeting somebody through somebody.
• 10:57
  Speaker B: But that's another thing. So I have girlfriends who they already have their, like, click. But it's drama. I don't want mom drama. I don't need mom drama.
• 11:05
  Speaker A: I'll help you, like, solutionize, but I don't want to be involved.
• 11:08
  Speaker B: I don't want to, like, not be invited to Alexa's birthday party. Like, I don't give a shit. Like, yeah. Like, it's not that deep.
• 11:15
  Speaker A: Yeah, it's deep for me, though.
• 11:17
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 11:17
  Speaker A: Alexa, invite me.
• 11:19
  Speaker B: Please invite me.
• 11:19
  Speaker A: No, I understand that, though.
• 11:21
  Speaker B: I have girlfriends that are, like, literally talking about the mom. Group chat about the mom not being invited to play date.
• 11:26
  Speaker A: Did you just go somewhere with a group of moms?
• 11:29
  Speaker B: Yeah, I went somewhere with a group of moms.
• 11:30
  Speaker A: Scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the best. You can be honest.
• 11:34
  Speaker B: I mean, it was fine.
• 11:36
  Speaker A: I mean, you could be honest. Let's be honest here. This is an open floor. No harm. I mean, some. We're over 30. We vibe or we don't.
• 11:43
  Speaker B: Well, that's another thing. So the moms that I were just. That I was just with are over 40. So I feel like it's like a big. So age gap.
• 11:51
  Speaker A: I mean, so you got along, but. Yeah, we got along.
• 11:54
  Speaker B: We just. I just. Like, some of them were just not my people. Okay. Which is fine.
• 11:58
  Speaker A: Not your type.
• 11:59
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 11:59
  Speaker A: And that's fine.
• 12:00
  Speaker B: You could say that.
• 12:01
  Speaker A: Say it out loud.
• 12:03
  Speaker B: Some of them were not my type.
• 12:05
  Speaker A: That was so hard.
• 12:08
  Speaker B: No, but that means I don't like to hurt feelings.
• 12:09
  Speaker A: No, you're not hurting anybody's feelings. You're just being honest. There's a difference.
• 12:12
  Speaker B: I mean, there are tons of moms that I've met that I was just like, oh, like, you are way too granola or you're too late. Like, if you're fucking vegan, like, I'm probably not going to get along with you.
• 12:21
  Speaker A: And it's okay.
• 12:21
  Speaker B: That's fine.
• 12:22
  Speaker A: Yeah, but, like, you're forced to be my friend.
• 12:23
  Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. You're vegan.
• 12:25
  Speaker A: No, but I'm saying, like, you're forced to, like, accept the quirks.
• 12:28
  Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, I. And I love you. And same for you with me.
• 12:31
  Speaker A: Like, yeah.
• 12:32
  Speaker B: Wants to be friends with me, not me.
• 12:34
  Speaker A: And no, but my thing is, like, you don't have to be afraid to say, like, I didn't get along with this group of moms. Like, you're 35 years old. We have to get along with the group of moms.
• 12:42
  Speaker B: Right. You don't. And you don't have to be friends.
• 12:43
  Speaker A: With anyone you don't have to be friends with.
• 12:44
  Speaker B: You have to be nice.
• 12:45
  Speaker A: Of course. Who's not being nice?
• 12:48
  Speaker B: I think some people are not nice. I haven't come across it, but I'm just saying I'll kick their ass if you don't get along. You still can be friendly and nice at drop off pickup.
• 12:56
  Speaker A: Of course.
• 12:56
  Speaker B: And that's.
• 12:57
  Speaker A: I mean, you have to see them all the time. You have to be.
• 12:58
  Speaker B: Yeah, you have to be nice.
• 12:59
  Speaker A: But I think we've come to the conclusion that we both would love to meet a group of mom friends.
• 13:04
  Speaker B: Yes.
• 13:04
  Speaker A: When our kids are at sports or stuff like that. Like, there's some people who like, don't want mom friends.
• 13:08
  Speaker B: No, I would like a mom friend.
• 13:09
  Speaker A: Me too. I agree.
• 13:10
  Speaker B: I think going through life with friends, especially at the ages that your kids.
• 13:13
  Speaker A: Are, I mean, I witnessed better. Yeah. I witnessed firsthand a couple that I know. Not that they didn't have a group of mom friends or dad friends, but it started when their kids actually played sports. I'm not talking about squirts. I'm talking about like real basketball and like, and football and all that stuff. And literally to the point where they're at their parties, they're going to. On European vacations with them. And that's their core group now.
• 13:40
  Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
• 13:42
  Speaker A: And that's that. And not that you're dropping everybody else that you used to be friends with around you, but you're just hanging out with the people that are growing with your family and that's that. And I want that.
• 13:50
  Speaker B: And I think what you said before, it's very hard in this stage when our kids are not like, fully into sports. Like, where do you. You might meet a mom at a park.
• 13:58
  Speaker A: I remember one time, like, that's not my vibe. Like, it's not gonna be fun. No.
• 14:00
  Speaker B: One time. I like, shooting your shot with a mom at a park is fucking funny. I have a funny story for this one time. I met a mom. I like, she seemed like, she seemed like, fine, just like randomly.
• 14:08
  Speaker A: At the park.
• 14:09
  Speaker B: Yeah, at the park.
• 14:09
  Speaker A: Hi, I'm Emma. I'm a mom too.
• 14:11
  Speaker B: Yeah. This is like, I was a new.
• 14:13
  Speaker A: The one that.
• 14:17
  Speaker B: No, no, no. Oh, no, no.
• 14:19
  Speaker A: I can't say it out loud because her mom will freak out.
• 14:21
  Speaker B: It's the one story I couldn't tell my mom. No, but this is. This is even funnier. So I was like, I liked her. She seems cool and like, I. But I was like, nervous to like, what do you, like, ask for her number? Like, it was like, it was like a dating thing. Like, I was literally trying to shoot my shot.
• 14:35
  Speaker A: I will not do that.
• 14:36
  Speaker B: But no, the kicker is she was a lesbian.
• 14:39
  Speaker A: I'm freaking. That's even better for you.
• 14:42
  Speaker B: I love that. No, but like, she. I mean, she had a partner, but, like, she I think she thought I was hitting on her, like. Cause she was like, oh, well, my partner and I. And after I asked for the number, and I was like, oh, yeah, like, I'd love to get coffee with you and Leslie.
• 14:56
  Speaker A: I'm going to walk away.
• 14:58
  Speaker B: But isn't that funny?
• 14:59
  Speaker A: That is hilarious. Because, like, I'm so hard to get. I won't ask for the number. Someone has to ask for mine.
• 15:03
  Speaker B: Oh, see? Yeah.
• 15:04
  Speaker A: Like, then I'll talk.
• 15:05
  Speaker B: I remember, like, being a little bit nervous, like, asking for the number because I've never, like. I mean, I would never ask for a guy's number. Like, you have to ask me. Right. So that. At a park with a mom such like, that.
• 15:16
  Speaker A: Also, what I was thinking about is.
• 15:18
  Speaker B: I. Daddy is a state of mind.
• 15:19
  Speaker A: Daddy's a state of mind. And what I was thinking about is I think I'm going to be the. The vibe that I'm going to become a mom friend. I'm going to become friends with a mom that I was. I knew prior that we're both moms now, if that makes sense.
• 15:35
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 15:35
  Speaker A: Am I making sense?
• 15:36
  Speaker B: Like, I, like, you know, where they came from, you know, their back.
• 15:39
  Speaker A: Y. Yes.
• 15:40
  Speaker B: I could see that. Because people are. I mean, there are people from all over the world that just are parents.
• 15:45
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 15:46
  Speaker B: Some of them shouldn't be. Yeah, some of them.
• 15:49
  Speaker A: I mean, but, like, back to, like, being their vibe. Like, some parents just, like, aren't our vibe. And that's okay.
• 15:54
  Speaker B: That's fine.
• 15:55
  Speaker A: But I want to know if there's like. I mean, is there. There's apps out there that you can.
• 15:59
  Speaker B: There is. There's the.
• 16:00
  Speaker A: I'm not doing that.
• 16:01
  Speaker B: The peanut app.
• 16:02
  Speaker A: I'm not doing that. Are you doing that?
• 16:04
  Speaker B: I'm not doing that. But will you do that? I won't do that. Because I feel like I. I could find a mom friend without being on an app. I'm, like, cool enough or I don't need to. If. If I need to find you on an app, then I should probably, like.
• 16:17
  Speaker A: Not have any friends.
• 16:18
  Speaker B: No. But I think. I think it is a good way maybe.
• 16:22
  Speaker A: Yeah. Like, if. If.
• 16:23
  Speaker B: If you're an introvert, I think if.
• 16:24
  Speaker A: You'Re like, no, not even that. If you can't socially, if you can't be social.
• 16:29
  Speaker B: I guess I. I think it's a cool idea.
• 16:31
  Speaker A: It's a cool idea.
• 16:32
  Speaker B: I don't know if I'm gonna.
• 16:32
  Speaker A: Just not for me.
• 16:33
  Speaker B: Swipe left or swipe right.
• 16:34
  Speaker A: Yeah, I'm not doing that. I'm not I'm not doing that. Hey, where did you meet her? On an app. That's crazy. Not doing that. I mean, like, should we talk about our meeting the other night? She was like, oh, can you. I'm like, all right, I'm gonna do it. Because Emily's, like, one eye open on this meeting.
• 16:46
  Speaker B: I was really tired.
• 16:47
  Speaker A: Yeah, right.
• 16:47
  Speaker B: We all Sunday at 9pm it was 9pm sleeping.
• 16:51
  Speaker A: I just drove back from Long island that day.
• 16:53
  Speaker B: You did? I drove yesterday. I. It is so nice having one kid.
• 16:57
  Speaker A: I'm so happy for you that you told me that story. I really am. That was a good day for you.
• 17:01
  Speaker B: I dropped off my kids at school, Vienna and Joey Rocco was in the car. I shot down to Jersey City. I met my girlfriend who has a newborn. We got lunch. It was perfect.
• 17:12
  Speaker A: And Rocco was good.
• 17:13
  Speaker B: Rocco was great.
• 17:13
  Speaker A: And he's usually not.
• 17:14
  Speaker B: And he's usually terror. He was perfect. And she was like, is this is your problem, child? I go, you don't.
• 17:20
  Speaker A: Yeah. Like, people don't understand.
• 17:21
  Speaker B: Yeah. I was like, no, I'm not lying.
• 17:23
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 17:24
  Speaker B: He's a fucking.
• 17:25
  Speaker A: You kind of witnessed what Gia was. You say he's an angel. He was just, like, flailing like a.
• 17:28
  Speaker B: Lunatic because he cried for one second. People have, like, a spectrum of their own children, which is so funny.
• 17:34
  Speaker A: Look, he's an angel.
• 17:35
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 17:35
  Speaker A: He's flailing his head on the concrete. Um, anyway, back to what I was talking about, because we're sidetracked. I just, like, am worried. Like, I definitely just need. And I also, like. I feel like I also want my husband to get along with the dad.
• 17:47
  Speaker B: Oh.
• 17:47
  Speaker A: I don't want. Just like.
• 17:48
  Speaker B: That's an ideal scenario too.
• 17:50
  Speaker A: Like, real.
• 17:51
  Speaker B: Like, real get along because I.
• 17:53
  Speaker A: Come with me because I'm going.
• 17:55
  Speaker B: I have come across mom friends in my five years of being a mom where I could vibe with the mom, but Joey could not.
• 18:03
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 18:03
  Speaker B: For the life of my mom, get along with the dad. And can't do that either. Because then, like, you can't come over.
• 18:11
  Speaker A: And then it's gonna be weird. Now you gotta think about it, like, this is my main thing. I don't care if you drink or this or that. What we have in common.
• 18:18
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 18:19
  Speaker A: I just need a feeling of when you come over.
• 18:21
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 18:22
  Speaker A: It's not like, stress.
• 18:24
  Speaker B: Right.
• 18:24
  Speaker A: Not like what you're talking about is trash. I'm saying, like, you know, when someone comes to your house.
• 18:27
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 18:27
  Speaker A: You just, like.
• 18:28
  Speaker B: You just want it to feel comfortable.
• 18:29
  Speaker A: I just want to be comfortable.
• 18:31
  Speaker B: I get that. I totally get that.
• 18:33
  Speaker A: But so what you mentioned when we were talking about this prior, when we were planning this episode, you were like, so what if our kids get along? But we don't.
• 18:40
  Speaker B: That sucks.
• 18:42
  Speaker A: Like, the kid always asks for Jeremy. I want to hang out with Jeremy. But, like, I don't want to speak to Patricia. You know, that's hard. What do you do?
• 18:51
  Speaker B: You plan a play date?
• 18:53
  Speaker A: No, you just drop off. If they're at the age you drop off the house.
• 18:56
  Speaker B: And then I guess my kids are not at that age yet, but I guess that's what you do.
• 19:01
  Speaker A: Like, that is so crazy to me that people, like, just.
• 19:03
  Speaker B: I also feel like I'm always going to be the house with the play date.
• 19:06
  Speaker A: Me too. Because I. I just like, my mom was that.
• 19:08
  Speaker B: And I like seeing the kids. I also like planning, like, little crafts. Like, I like that.
• 19:12
  Speaker A: Yeah, I'm babysitting. You're like the neighborhood babysitter.
• 19:17
  Speaker B: Speaking of neighborhood babysitter, I had all the neighbor. All the neighborhood kids. We went. There's a house down the street. Okay. They're. They decorate for Halloween. They are like full blown Halloween already. My kids have gone to that house. On Monday, it was seven times. We walked down to the house because they're still decorating and they want to see like, the new thing. But I brought the neighborhood kids and that while they're decorating, they're putting out their old toys on, like the curb. You could play with them. No, to get rid of, like, take them. Well, I didn't want fucking curb toys. And I'm like, no, we're not taking those toys. But my neighborhood kids that are not my kids, they're like, Rocco would really like this. So they picked up the toys and brought it to my house. And now I have curbside toys sitting on.
• 20:01
  Speaker A: No, I am not coming over.
• 20:03
  Speaker B: I mean, they're not staying. But they're outside. They're outside. They're not coming over. Leave them there.
• 20:06
  Speaker A: Let them get destroyed.
• 20:07
  Speaker B: Oh, yeah. But how funny.
• 20:09
  Speaker A: So funny. That is such a type of day.
• 20:12
  Speaker B: Yeah. Literally five kids. I mean. No. Well, the kids are older, so, like, they, the kid, like, they, they come to my house and the parents aren't always with them.
• 20:24
  Speaker A: And your kids don't go there.
• 20:25
  Speaker B: No, Because, I mean, my kids are still young.
• 20:28
  Speaker A: You're always home.
• 20:29
  Speaker B: But they actually have been, like, on their front lawn a little bit more going there.
• 20:32
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 20:33
  Speaker B: Just like letting loose.
• 20:34
  Speaker A: You don't hang out with the parents. Why is that?
• 20:37
  Speaker B: I will. On like a Friday.
• 20:38
  Speaker A: Oh, you would?
• 20:39
  Speaker B: Yeah. Okay. They Drink. They're cool.
• 20:43
  Speaker A: They drank. That's all I met all. That's all that matters.
• 20:45
  Speaker B: Honestly, on a Friday night, if you, if you could hang.
• 20:49
  Speaker A: I know you just want someone to drink with. Yeah, yeah, I see. I'm not like that. Yeah, I'd rather just like, drink with my husband here or like, invite someone like a family member over.
• 20:57
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 20:59
  Speaker A: I just grew up with so much family, so, like, I just have so much to choose from rather than.
• 21:03
  Speaker B: Right.
• 21:03
  Speaker A: Explore my options. But I, I, I am look at.
• 21:06
  Speaker B: Mom friends as the kids.
• 21:08
  Speaker A: If you want to, you know, send me your profile. I'll review it.
• 21:11
  Speaker B: Send me your app.
• 21:12
  Speaker A: No, but if so if you talked about what you want, like my ideal. Like I said, like, I just want somebody who I could just, like, hang out with. No, no. Like, kind of like a you, like someone I don't have to, like, worry about.
• 21:22
  Speaker B: Yeah, that's not. I don't want, I don't want to have to like.
• 21:25
  Speaker A: Oh, my God. I said this in front of so and so do you think feel like.
• 21:27
  Speaker B: I have to, like, put on a show or.
• 21:29
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 21:31
  Speaker B: Or really, like. Yeah, try hard.
• 21:33
  Speaker A: It can explain it. Just like that feeling you get.
• 21:35
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 21:35
  Speaker A: Like, oh, my God, so and so's coming over.
• 21:37
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 21:37
  Speaker A: One and then you'll ever. And then drink. It trickles out. You don't ever invite them.
• 21:40
  Speaker B: Right.
• 21:41
  Speaker A: But that's would be my dating profile. It's not much, you guys, so if you're like, listening, be my friend. But I think I have to wait till Gio's in sports. Yeah, it's just like a thing.
• 21:49
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 21:49
  Speaker A: Older sports.
• 21:50
  Speaker B: Yeah, me too.
• 21:51
  Speaker A: Unless I meet someone at Squirts this Sunday.
• 21:53
  Speaker B: Might, I might. I believe you're doing Squirts without me.
• 21:56
  Speaker A: Your husband doesn't want to take Rocco.
• 21:58
  Speaker B: I know, it's sad.
• 21:59
  Speaker A: Oh, that's a hidden problem. Anyway.
• 22:01
  Speaker B: Oh, wait, but I made you a profile. I'm going to read your profile.
• 22:04
  Speaker A: Okay, go.
• 22:05
  Speaker B: All right. Your name? Dominique. You're 30 years old, status, married, one kid. I did the mom chop hair. But I still look cool and I'm confident.
• 22:15
  Speaker A: Is this what I'm saying? I'm constantly sanitizing is absurd.
• 22:20
  Speaker B: Looking for a mom who understands the importance of probiotics and hand sanitizer clipped to every diaper bag.
• 22:26
  Speaker A: You're taking it too far. Go ahead.
• 22:28
  Speaker B: Bio. Bio buys organic everything. Granola, but still cool.
• 22:34
  Speaker A: Why are you talking in that tone?
• 22:35
  Speaker B: Make granola sandwiches.
• 22:38
  Speaker A: Wait, granola sandwiches are crazy. Also, why are you speaking like.
• 22:42
  Speaker B: I'm not sure, Ms. Lucy, I don't know. We'll have everything you need. But forgets her keys and phone wherever I go.
• 22:52
  Speaker A: So crazy but healthy.
• 22:53
  Speaker B: Wipes down playground swings when Geoffrey before Gio touches them.
• 22:58
  Speaker A: And my kid still gets hand foot mouth. But go ahead.
• 23:00
  Speaker B: Always looks put together, even if I just throw a claw clip in my hair. We'll dance in the middle of Target with my kid and not care that anybody's watching me. Has essential oil for literally every crisis.
• 23:16
  Speaker A: This is hilarious. Keep going.
• 23:17
  Speaker B: Okay, these are your deal breakers.
• 23:18
  Speaker A: Go.
• 23:20
  Speaker B: You will not be friends with a mom who lets their kids eat McDonald's.
• 23:25
  Speaker A: Okay. No, I would be friends with them.
• 23:27
  Speaker B: Okay. A mom who allows shoes in the house.
• 23:31
  Speaker A: No, I hate that. Took your shoes off.
• 23:33
  Speaker B: A mom who shares snacks straight from the bag.
• 23:36
  Speaker A: What does that mean? Oh, shit. From the back.
• 23:38
  Speaker B: Yeah. I feel like your germaphobe might get a little.
• 23:41
  Speaker A: No, I don't mind.
• 23:42
  Speaker B: Okay.
• 23:43
  Speaker A: But as soon as I let my. My. As soon as I take my glasses off, my tongue gets amber mouth. So swipe right.
• 23:50
  Speaker B: If you wash your hands for a full 20 seconds, then you could be Dom's.
• 23:54
  Speaker A: So funny you say that. Because I do. 20 seconds. That's hilarious. Okay. You don't even use soap, do you? I'm your friend.
• 24:05
  Speaker B: No, I made sure. Honestly, you were there the other day. I made sure I had antibacterial soap in the bathroom.
• 24:10
  Speaker A: That's hilarious. Do I stress you out when I come over?
• 24:13
  Speaker B: No, I know I don't.
• 24:14
  Speaker A: Okay, let me read yours. Is yours on here?
• 24:17
  Speaker B: I think, yeah.
• 24:18
  Speaker A: Emily.
• 24:19
  Speaker B: Emily.
• 24:22
  Speaker A: I read it like, I have no idea. I'm going to read like this. Emily, 33, married, with three kids.
• 24:32
  Speaker B: But.
• 24:32
  Speaker A: Mentally at happy hour.
• 24:34
  Speaker B: We're losing listeners right now.
• 24:36
  Speaker A: Okay, so, Emily, 33, status, married, three kids, but mentally at happy hour, looking for. People don't want that.
• 24:44
  Speaker B: Who has three kids?
• 24:45
  Speaker A: No, like, you're always at happy hour.
• 24:48
  Speaker B: I'm mentally at happy hour.
• 24:49
  Speaker A: Oh, okay. Mentally.
• 24:51
  Speaker B: Yeah. I'm always at happy hour.
• 24:53
  Speaker A: Mentally, happy hour. Looking for a mom who won't bat an eye if I show up with my kids in mismatched socks, a roadie in my Stanley looking for someone open to either talk shit about our husbands or talk about sex openly and willingly.
• 25:11
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 25:11
  Speaker A: Yeah. I feel like I am that for you.
• 25:14
  Speaker B: You are. You're my best mom.
• 25:16
  Speaker A: Okay, Perfect. Don't replace me.
• 25:18
  Speaker B: There's no replacing you, hon.
• 25:20
  Speaker A: Bio known to bring the fun and the chaos. Love language is coffee and a bagel. Do you even drink coffee?
• 25:28
  Speaker B: Martini glass.
• 25:30
  Speaker A: That's Hilarious.
• 25:31
  Speaker B: No, I run on Duncan.
• 25:32
  Speaker A: So. So love language.
• 25:33
  Speaker B: I literally run on Duncan.
• 25:34
  Speaker A: Yeah, I hate Duncan.
• 25:35
  Speaker B: I know. You hate Starbucks and Duncan.
• 25:37
  Speaker A: Yeah, hey, both. I make my own.
• 25:38
  Speaker B: I do both.
• 25:39
  Speaker A: That's my problem. That should be my bio. Make your own coffee.
• 25:41
  Speaker B: True. I'm putting that in there.
• 25:42
  Speaker A: Okay, lastly, for your bio is we'll provide the entertainment and the drinks. I love that. But I'm the host, though. You provide.
• 25:51
  Speaker B: I'll provide. You.
• 25:52
  Speaker A: I host.
• 25:53
  Speaker B: Okay.
• 25:53
  Speaker A: Okay, deal breakers. Moms who don't drink. That's annoying. Okay, I will have a glass of wine with you.
• 26:01
  Speaker B: Yeah. You'll drink? Yeah, I drink. You're, like, sober.
• 26:03
  Speaker A: I'm not. Where'd you go? Where's your coffee? I don't know. I left it over there. Vegan moms or kids, Is that actually a deal breaker? Yeah, it is annoying. Like, oh, my God. So what kind of what can you eat?
• 26:13
  Speaker B: Honestly, if I'm having a play date. Yes. Because my house is just not vegan. Yeah, I mean, I would accommodate if I knew that one.
• 26:20
  Speaker A: Like, I don't want. I have to ask. I have to ask, like, what? I would ask, like, allergies.
• 26:25
  Speaker B: Mean, I would ask before giving Gio a snack because I'm scared that you would not feed him that. You are that mom. Not the vegan mom.
• 26:34
  Speaker A: Am I.
• 26:35
  Speaker B: Like, would you let Gio eat, like, regular goldfish?
• 26:38
  Speaker A: Yeah. M. Ah. But I don't feed him that in my pan. Like, I'm not gonna have it every.
• 26:42
  Speaker B: Day, but if, like, I did it. Yeah, of course. Okay.
• 26:46
  Speaker A: All right, so take it back.
• 26:47
  Speaker B: I learn something new every day.
• 26:48
  Speaker A: I know you do. Okay. Your last deal breaker is silent judging when my toddler eats Doritos off the floor. Okay, don't. Don't do that for Gio. I don't want him to have Doritos, and I don't want him to eat them on the floor.
• 26:59
  Speaker B: She too scared.
• 27:02
  Speaker A: Well, don't. My brother choked on a Dorito when he was Gio's age, so no Doritos.
• 27:06
  Speaker B: Oh, like it's because it's a Dorito. No.
• 27:08
  Speaker A: And because Doritos are the worst thing for you on planet Earth. Yeah, like, actually never.
• 27:11
  Speaker B: You told me that once. Yeah, Vienna loves Doritos.
• 27:14
  Speaker A: My kids don't.
• 27:14
  Speaker B: Joey doesn't like them, but Vienna likes them.
• 27:16
  Speaker A: So your tag. Wait, what was my tagline?
• 27:18
  Speaker B: Your tagline was swipe right if you wash your hands for 24 seconds.
• 27:22
  Speaker A: Oh, that's hilarious. Your tagline is, we'll be your ride or die. But probably not your designated driver. That's hilarious.
• 27:30
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 27:30
  Speaker A: Should we make a profile?
• 27:31
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 27:32
  Speaker A: I love that so much.
• 27:33
  Speaker B: We can make a blank profile and have other moms fill it in and then post them on our story. So that if maybe we could connect other moms that are similar things.
• 27:42
  Speaker A: I hope so.
• 27:43
  Speaker B: Maybe we can make a mama clock Dating Apple let's dating app for moms. Mama clock?
• 27:51
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 27:52
  Speaker B: Local moms only.
• 27:54
  Speaker A: Yeah. That's another thing. Like we need to be local. Like we're not doing long distance.
• 27:57
  Speaker B: Yeah. Well, I was talking to my long distance mom friend today.
• 28:01
  Speaker A: She has a friend that lives in Miami.
• 28:03
  Speaker B: I went to college.
• 28:04
  Speaker A: What do you talk about with your other friends?
• 28:06
  Speaker B: Are you jealous?
• 28:07
  Speaker A: Kinda.
• 28:08
  Speaker B: No, but I was, I was catching up. You know when you have catch up friends?
• 28:11
  Speaker A: Yeah. So cute.
• 28:11
  Speaker B: So she lives in Miami. I love her to death.
• 28:14
  Speaker A: I love that she used to live here.
• 28:16
  Speaker B: She used to live here. She's five nuts, but I love her.
• 28:19
  Speaker A: Okay.
• 28:19
  Speaker B: She has two boys and they go to private Catholic school.
• 28:24
  Speaker A: Private Catholic school?
• 28:25
  Speaker B: Yeah. So the school is very strict. And I asked her, I was like, I need some. I might need some material.
• 28:31
  Speaker A: What type of mom is she?
• 28:32
  Speaker B: She's neurotic.
• 28:33
  Speaker A: So is she.
• 28:34
  Speaker B: Like, she's like a. She's like you. Like, like with healthiness.
• 28:39
  Speaker A: I love that.
• 28:39
  Speaker B: She's very. She's a homophobe.
• 28:41
  Speaker A: She's a love that too. This is why another thing, like, it's easy.
• 28:44
  Speaker B: She's also like a badass. Like she's a realtor. Like she's a hustler. She's. She's a working mom.
• 28:49
  Speaker A: I. Yeah.
• 28:50
  Speaker B: She has her own money.
• 28:51
  Speaker A: Like I want someone that likes.
• 28:53
  Speaker B: She can relate to me. Designer bag. I know.
• 28:55
  Speaker A: I need a mom that is a germaphobe with me. Like my friend Gianna. She's a germaphobe with me.
• 29:00
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 29:01
  Speaker A: We've always know back and forth about the germs that fly around our house.
• 29:04
  Speaker B: I understand that. That's nice for you. Like I met a mom at a play place one time and I live.
• 29:08
  Speaker A: From the gas station.
• 29:09
  Speaker B: No, she was like hand sanitizing like a hundred times and I like, I was like, oh shit, she's gonna think I'm so dirty. But like Dom would really like her. Like I should set down.
• 29:19
  Speaker A: Set me up.
• 29:20
  Speaker B: You would like her.
• 29:22
  Speaker A: I love that.
• 29:22
  Speaker B: I met her at a play place. Don't know.
• 29:23
  Speaker A: Wait, so tell me what your Miami friend that you have give you advice on something?
• 29:27
  Speaker B: I was at. No, I was just asking her, like, how does she make mom friends because she's a Jersey girl who lives in Miami and like raising her family in Miami. But she was like, it's really hard because you either do it at like the drop off pickup line, but that's like a quick interaction. It's like you can't really get to know someone. Then like, you kind of like you're judging, like what they're wearing.
• 29:45
  Speaker A: Right.
• 29:46
  Speaker B: Also Karen's. And then she said, I think sports will be like a big thing. Like.
• 29:51
  Speaker A: Yeah. Because you're with him every weekend traveling, if they're on a travel team, like, shit like that.
• 29:56
  Speaker B: Yeah. But she said it's hard to make mom friends like that. Oh. She also said, like last year she was the class mom, so she got like the list of the kids and that's how you really get to know the other moms. Because, like, you have to fundraise, you have to ask moms for money and.
• 30:09
  Speaker A: Like do all that kind of.
• 30:11
  Speaker B: And like, you know, the ins and outs of like other families. Like my mom, it's a lot.
• 30:15
  Speaker A: My mom definitely had the mom friends growing up, but because she was friends with them prior.
• 30:22
  Speaker B: Right. Was your mom friends with the other dance moms?
• 30:25
  Speaker A: Like, she was very small. Like, she had one best friend, God rest her soul.
• 30:32
  Speaker B: She.
• 30:32
  Speaker A: We did everything, everything together. Like, we would drive down to South Carolina together. We would go to every competition together. And I was best friends still. My friend Nikki.
• 30:40
  Speaker B: Okay.
• 30:40
  Speaker A: That's. It was her mom.
• 30:42
  Speaker B: Are your mom still friends?
• 30:44
  Speaker A: No, she passed away.
• 30:45
  Speaker B: Oh.
• 30:46
  Speaker A: But it was her. My mom's absolute best friend passed away. Yeah. No, it was the saddest ever. And she was the greatest human on planet earth, God rest her soul.
• 30:53
  Speaker B: My mom was Sam and Carly's mom.
• 30:55
  Speaker A: My mom, like, doesn't know. My mom's an introvert. Like, she doesn't make friends like that. And. But we were dancing every second of every hour of every day. And my mom was best friends with her. And I was so cute, like, now that I think about it, because my mom was never that mom to like, make friends, but another friend, like in elementary school, she was best friends with that mom. But I. She was friends with her prior to me and the. Me and the girl being friends.
• 31:16
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 31:17
  Speaker A: So my mom was never. But she was always class mom and stuff like that. But my mom was always, like, kept to herself. She had like, her bits and pieces. But I feel like at my town it was just like you just knew everybody because they all grew up together.
• 31:30
  Speaker B: Yeah, I feel.
• 31:30
  Speaker A: But I don't have that so it's.
• 31:32
  Speaker B: Like, I just think that our kids just need to be a little bit older to my mom's best friend, Sam and Carly, my twin best friends.
• 31:39
  Speaker A: Oh, your mom was best friends with her mom?
• 31:40
  Speaker B: Yeah, with. Her mom passed away and she. But. But their mom was, like, a social butterfly. She was, like, the mom. Like, she was like. Also she was, like, gorgeous. Like, everyone loved her. Like, everyone gravitated to her. And she just was like, she had all these friends. And like, my mom. My mom was best friends with her, but she also, like, kept to herself more. So she wasn't like, come with me to this event.
• 32:03
  Speaker A: Your mom would be like, no.
• 32:04
  Speaker B: Yeah. So, like, she was like, the mom. I feel like she was. Love that mom. Yeah.
• 32:08
  Speaker A: Like, I feel like your mom was like, my mom, like, just had, like, one or two.
• 32:10
  Speaker B: Yeah. And she was like, kids did play.
• 32:11
  Speaker A: Dates, and that's it.
• 32:12
  Speaker B: Yeah, I grew all these mom.
• 32:14
  Speaker A: It's like, I'm sad I'm not really friends with one of the girls. I mean, I see her on socials and stuff. I'm really friends with one of the girls that I was absolute, like, twin best friends with. Like, I did everything with her. Yeah, my mom is friends with her. Her mom for a while, but, like, when the kids were apart, like, you know, that's it.
• 32:28
  Speaker B: But also, I feel like a mom friend is, like. Especially if your kids are friends, it's like a different dynamic of friend. It's not gonna be, like, your fucking best friend. Like, when I talked about my ideal friend, like, you don't really, like, do the nitty gritty. Like, talk to them about all the shit that you're gonna talk to, like.
• 32:43
  Speaker A: Your best friend about us.
• 32:44
  Speaker B: Unless it's, like, us, right? Like, it's like. It's like a different dynamic.
• 32:47
  Speaker A: Yeah, definitely.
• 32:47
  Speaker B: So it's hard. I feel like it's hard to, like.
• 32:50
  Speaker A: I mean, there's, like, so many different kinds of moms. There's the overachiever mom we talked about at the Balloon arch. The ghost mom says, like, she'll hang out, but never shows up. I can't stand that. I don't wanna be friends with the ghost mom.
• 33:00
  Speaker B: I don't wanna be friends with the ghost mom. I don't like the girls. Oh, that's actually funny. No, I don't like that one.
• 33:04
  Speaker A: The chaos twin. Your kids are wild together, but at least you don't feel judged.
• 33:09
  Speaker B: You love that. That's what I love.
• 33:10
  Speaker A: The cool PTA mom secretly supplies the spike seltzers. I kind of could be that.
• 33:14
  Speaker B: Yeah, you could be that.
• 33:15
  Speaker A: Yeah. No, I love that. I think there's so many different kinds of moms. And I think, like, it's very important to have mom friends.
• 33:23
  Speaker B: I think it really is that you.
• 33:24
  Speaker A: Vibe with and you don't have life.
• 33:26
  Speaker B: Easier because, hey, we're all. We're going.
• 33:28
  Speaker A: Our husbands are working.
• 33:29
  Speaker B: Our husbands are working. Or are there any stay at home dads out there that we know?
• 33:33
  Speaker A: I know, let's talk.
• 33:34
  Speaker B: But I think, like, motherhood, the journey is just, like, hard and it's easier to just. Are you asleep? Do you want me to kick you? I'm gonna shake it.
• 33:45
  Speaker A: It's the worst feeling in the world.
• 33:46
  Speaker B: It happens to my kids all the time. And I. I just squeeze.
• 33:49
  Speaker A: Do you think Gio falls asleep at that age?
• 33:52
  Speaker B: It could, but they probably don't. They don't know how to, like, verbalize. But it happens to Joey all the time. He's like, mommy, my foot. It's the num num.
• 33:58
  Speaker A: It's the num num. No, the num num's happening to my. Okay, well, let's play a game.
• 34:02
  Speaker B: Okay.
• 34:03
  Speaker A: Last but not least.
• 34:04
  Speaker B: All right, let's get after it. Okay, I know that I always do it to you, so. No, I'm still doing it. Oh, God, you're gonna lay.
• 34:12
  Speaker A: What do I do, give it to you? Okay, what's the problem here?
• 34:14
  Speaker B: All right, I'm gonna read a potential mom friend scenario and you have to tell me if you would still hang out with her or if. Or if you're done. You're not friends.
• 34:23
  Speaker A: Everybody probably go.
• 34:24
  Speaker B: All right, ready?
• 34:25
  Speaker A: Yep.
• 34:27
  Speaker B: She brings a bottle of wine to the play date, but it's Barefoot Moscato. Do you know what Barefoot Moscato is?
• 34:33
  Speaker A: Yes, I used to drink it in college. No. Like, okay, I'll be her friend, but I'm gonna drink my own shit.
• 34:40
  Speaker B: Right? If you bring Bear from Moscow.
• 34:43
  Speaker A: Yeah. Like, actually, not that I won't be friends with you, but I'll be like, oh, my God, this bitch is bringing Bear fun.
• 34:49
  Speaker B: Like, what if she brought, like, a box of the, like as a gift? Or she's drinking. I don't. Like.
• 34:55
  Speaker A: Are you kidding? No. I can't imagine.
• 34:58
  Speaker B: People are crazy. All right? She tells you that she doesn't let her kids have screen time, but then, like, you catch her kid just, like, doing screen time.
• 35:05
  Speaker A: Liar. Yeah, done. Okay, don't like a liar.
• 35:09
  Speaker B: She invites you over for coffee, but the coffee is decaf.
• 35:12
  Speaker A: It's fine.
• 35:13
  Speaker B: Oh, God, I'd Say bye, you. Would I decaf. What is the point of decaf coffee unless you're pregnant and you.
• 35:20
  Speaker A: Yeah, well, I guess the act.
• 35:22
  Speaker B: Okay, okay. Pretend she baked the cupcakes, but the shoprite sticker is still on it.
• 35:27
  Speaker A: Liar.
• 35:28
  Speaker B: Liar.
• 35:29
  Speaker A: Why are we lying? No, you're not my friend. Not my friend.
• 35:33
  Speaker B: I would be mortified.
• 35:34
  Speaker A: No, Mortified. I would be like, that's. We'll never have you at my house.
• 35:38
  Speaker B: She calls you mama every time she sees you, even though you've told her your name. 40 no time.
• 35:43
  Speaker A: Can't be friends with someone like that, Right? Fake.
• 35:45
  Speaker B: Can you imagine that, Mom? Like, mama. Come here, Mama.
• 35:47
  Speaker A: Fake.
• 35:48
  Speaker B: Come here, Mama.
• 35:48
  Speaker A: F A K E. Not my friend.
• 35:51
  Speaker B: Tells your kids. We don't use that word. But in my house. But you're in. But she's in your house. Like, your kid says a bad word and you're like, oh, we don't use that word, but it's your house.
• 36:02
  Speaker A: She says that.
• 36:02
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 36:04
  Speaker A: Mind your fucking own is what I would say.
• 36:07
  Speaker B: Shows up to your barbecue with a quinoa salad for 50 people.
• 36:11
  Speaker A: I love that, too. I want to make one.
• 36:14
  Speaker B: Won't let her kids eat goldfish, but lets them lick the shopping cart handle.
• 36:20
  Speaker A: She's cuckoo.
• 36:21
  Speaker B: Okay, so every story she tells starts out with. So I was talking to my therapist.
• 36:30
  Speaker A: All right, well, I'll still be your friend.
• 36:32
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 36:33
  Speaker A: Camel. To, like.
• 36:37
  Speaker B: Corrects your parenting in public with gentle suggestions.
• 36:40
  Speaker A: No. Oh, my God, no. No. Because you know what? I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm a mom. Yeah. I sanitize. Okay. But I'm very old school in my parenting style, so don't do that to me.
• 36:56
  Speaker B: Forgets to mention her kid has hand, foot, and mouth before the play date.
• 37:02
  Speaker A: Fist fighting. Fist fighting.
• 37:05
  Speaker B: Always. Venmo requests you $1.47 for the half juice box by. You know that there are.
• 37:13
  Speaker A: Yes, I know. I would never.
• 37:15
  Speaker B: There are people.
• 37:17
  Speaker A: You have a story for me?
• 37:18
  Speaker B: I don't, but there are.
• 37:22
  Speaker A: This bitch says nothing.
• 37:24
  Speaker B: Do you know that I was reading our reviews and someone wrote on reviews?
• 37:28
  Speaker A: Yeah, we have reviews.
• 37:29
  Speaker B: We have reviews. Oh, I didn't screenshot this to you. I was reading our reviews.
• 37:33
  Speaker A: How many reviews do you.
• 37:34
  Speaker B: A couple. And somebody wrote. Love the podcast. You guys are amazing. But Emily needs to open up more. I feel like I'm pretty fucking open.
• 37:43
  Speaker A: I agree with you, reviewer. She doesn't want to hurt anybody's feelings. No one's. You're not saying anything to me. I'm wide open.
• 37:51
  Speaker B: You're.
• 37:51
  Speaker A: You're being a fibber. You're a fibber.
• 37:53
  Speaker B: I feel like I'm pretty.
• 37:54
  Speaker A: You don't. You wanted to tell the story and you didn't tell the story.
• 37:57
  Speaker B: Well, because I have people listening, so.
• 37:59
  Speaker A: That'S not being open up. Like, what are you talking about? Jesus. I know, guys. Thank you, Revere. I'm the only one opening up over here.
• 38:08
  Speaker B: Reviewers.
• 38:08
  Speaker A: We're still good people.
• 38:10
  Speaker B: Yeah. You are not the only one opening. I. I feel like people know more about me than they know.
• 38:15
  Speaker A: No, they don't.
• 38:16
  Speaker B: Do you want to fucking fight?
• 38:18
  Speaker A: Yes, I do.
• 38:20
  Speaker B: I feel like I'm more open. Okay.
• 38:23
  Speaker A: You could have said some things and you don't. You just don't. It's okay. You don't want to be open on a podcast. There's.
• 38:29
  Speaker B: That's not true. Some things I can't talk about because.
• 38:34
  Speaker A: What, are you gonna hurt someone's little itty bitty feelings? God. Finish the game. Okay.
• 38:41
  Speaker B: This mom texts you at 5:45 in the morning and asks, do you want to go on a power walk?
• 38:47
  Speaker A: I gotta love that. I would probably say no, but that's kind of cute of her.
• 38:51
  Speaker B: I hate her.
• 38:52
  Speaker A: Oh, you hate her?
• 38:53
  Speaker B: Yeah, she always forgets her wallet when you guys are doing a Starbucks run.
• 38:56
  Speaker A: I mean, that's me.
• 38:57
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 38:58
  Speaker A: But I would not because I don't. I don't want to pay. It's because I would forget my wallet that.
• 39:02
  Speaker B: Okay. This mom makes group chats with 27 moms.
• 39:06
  Speaker A: I would do that.
• 39:07
  Speaker B: It's so annoying.
• 39:08
  Speaker A: It is so annoying.
• 39:08
  Speaker B: Don't make a group chat with other moms that I don't really know.
• 39:11
  Speaker A: Okay.
• 39:12
  Speaker B: I mean, I do that often.
• 39:13
  Speaker A: I feel like it's annoying. Okay. Sorry.
• 39:15
  Speaker B: Brags her kid was potty trained at 10 months.
• 39:19
  Speaker A: All right. She could still be my friend, but like, I'll be like, all right, enough.
• 39:22
  Speaker B: Okay. Invites you over, but all she wants to do is sell you her essential oils.
• 39:28
  Speaker A: It's me, so I can't not be friends with her.
• 39:31
  Speaker B: Tells you her husband would really get along with your husband. They should go golf sometime.
• 39:38
  Speaker A: My husband gets along with anybody, so that's an easy one for me. I'll be friends with you.
• 39:44
  Speaker B: Calls her husband daddy in front of everybody all the time, freaking out.
• 39:50
  Speaker A: Not a thing.
• 39:50
  Speaker B: That's all I got for you.
• 39:51
  Speaker A: That's kind of absolutely funny.
• 39:53
  Speaker B: Isn't that funny?
• 39:53
  Speaker A: Now that I know who I'm going to be friends with and who I'm.
• 39:56
  Speaker B: Not, Honestly, I feel like people. I. I also feel like this. That If. If you do listen to us, like, you kind of know what kind of people me and you are. So, like, you do that because you.
• 40:06
  Speaker A: Don'T tell your story.
• 40:07
  Speaker B: Apparently. I don't open up. Do you actually think that I don't open up?
• 40:09
  Speaker A: I've told you that before.
• 40:11
  Speaker B: I. I'm very.
• 40:12
  Speaker A: I think you're very. It's. It's okay.
• 40:14
  Speaker B: But ask me something right now. I'm open. I'm so. You're open about you.
• 40:20
  Speaker A: Yourself. Personal. But about situations.
• 40:22
  Speaker B: I don't like talking shit about people.
• 40:24
  Speaker A: That doesn't mean you're talking shit about people. I mean, you could just be honest. You're not saying, oh, my God, this person's a piece of. They wear these leggings and this, like.
• 40:35
  Speaker B: You're not talking about me.
• 40:37
  Speaker A: You're not talking about someone's appearance. You could be honest.
• 40:40
  Speaker B: Honestly, I. My whole life. I really. I don't like hurting people's feelings. Yeah.
• 40:43
  Speaker A: I mean.
• 40:44
  Speaker B: And I don't like confrontation.
• 40:45
  Speaker A: And that's okay.
• 40:46
  Speaker B: So I understand.
• 40:47
  Speaker A: But have a little bit of a backbone.
• 40:50
  Speaker B: True. Okay. Okay.
• 40:51
  Speaker A: I'm here for it. It's okay. One of us has to be honest.
• 40:53
  Speaker B: No. You fight for me.
• 40:54
  Speaker A: I do.
• 40:55
  Speaker B: Okay.
• 40:56
  Speaker A: Anyway, if you want to be our mom friend. We're taking applications.
• 41:02
  Speaker B: No, but the mom.
• 41:04
  Speaker A: Crickets. Crickets.
• 41:07
  Speaker B: We're really fun.
• 41:08
  Speaker A: We are.
• 41:09
  Speaker B: We are.
• 41:09
  Speaker A: Really a good time. And you get a mix of both worlds.
• 41:12
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 41:12
  Speaker A: Trash. Glorious. So. And that's it. Okay. We love you so much. Thank you for listening. Like Follow Subscribe Episode 20 Baby.
• 41:24
  Speaker B: Episode 20 We. We're having some fun guests coming up. Big guests.
• 41:28
  Speaker A: We have some meetings in the works and some people in the works as well.
• 41:32
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 41:33
  Speaker A: And that's all I have for you today on this Tuesday. We love you.
• 41:36
  Speaker B: By Sam.