Latest / The Steve & Jeff Show / S3 E29 - Project 2026 After Dark

Transcript

S3 E29 - Project 2026 After Dark · The Steve & Jeff Show

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to the Stephen Jeff Show, the funniest podcast ever.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_01: Hey people, I don't write the words, I just read them.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_01: Be sure and follow or subscribe to the Stephen Jeff Show wherever you listen to podcasts.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_01: Write us a review while you're there too.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_02: And now, here's Stephen Jeff.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_02: Well, hey, thank you, Johnny and Jeff.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_02: What a great time to be back in the studio.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_02: It's getting nice outside.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_02: It's summer almost, almost, isn't it?
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's gonna be fall soon.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, because summer lasts about three days.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_02: And then then we're right into fall.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_02: And then, of course, winter lasts about nine months.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah, I'm really looking forward to those three days, you know.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_02: Did you have a good week?
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_02: I did, you know, it was kind of a typical week in a lot of ways.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: Do anything interesting this week, Jeff?
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it just seems like whenever I have time off, Kathy makes me do like projects.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we're redoing our basement, so I had to go clean out the stuff.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: It kind of reminded me.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: Do you remember when we were gonna do storytelling and uh you and I were gonna go through stuff that was saved, you know, like a time capsule of things for the past.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: And right, it was it's kind of like that, you know.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: I was finding things that was from 30 years ago or 40 years ago, and it just sort of brought back memories.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I was just remembering why we didn't do that show because when we found the time capsule, we took the capsules and we were we were we were tripping for a few days, so yeah, we we just couldn't do it.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: But when you find old stuff like that, Jeff, I'd say just keep it, wait for it to come back into style.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_02: You know, a lot of stuff goes out of style and then comes back in, then goes out again, like a passive congress or tariffs or Alcatraz prison.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_02: There you go.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_02: See, so some of that comes back, you know.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_02: Speaking of old stuff that is cool again, vinyl albums are definitely making a comeback.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_02: No, for those you know, for people who need to hear the real thing, scratches and all the grooves, the pull sound of the music, it's just a whole different sound, it really is.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I could kill myself because I sold it like at a garage sale a number of years ago.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: I sold all my albums and you know, for like a dollar and an album or even less, and yeah, you know, just get it out of here.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I really regret it.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_02: I I feel bad too.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_02: I did the same thing.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_02: I sold them, you know, removing or something.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, but I think for a lot of people, the the whole vinyl thing is it's really a status thing.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_02: Another example is books.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm not talking Kindle, I'm talking real books, and not just for Kindle, you get your local library book burning fest the summer.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_02: We're gonna be wild with library book burning fests.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_02: Now, of course, you can get any books ever written online, but there's something about having real books, you know, those leather bound or even paperbacks, the books you can get hired carrying or drop on your toes or leave on an L train.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_02: That's reading, that's class.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: I think I have class.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: I've got what do you call those comic books?
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I've got lots of those.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: And archie comic books, you know, which are are rare.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if they still make archie comic books anymore, but they're wonderful and they're relevant because I don't know if you remember one of the characters was Jughead.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, oh yeah.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: Uh kind of reminds me of our king, you know, he's got the crown.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_02: Jughead was a little bit smarter, a little bit smarter.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: He's a little bit smarter, but and it was at a time when everything was kind of simpler, you know, everything was sort of black and white.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: Well, it was it was all white, but pretty much definitely not black, yeah.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but it was a time that I kind of wish you know I was still back at.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, I got the big brain, so I'm kind of showing off that I read stuff.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_02: So as you I'm sure you remember, I am one IQ point smarter than you.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_02: So damn it.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_02: That's really a compliment to both of us.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_02: So thank you.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you, John.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_02: And see, I said thank you.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_02: So can I have the weapons now?
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_02: No, but I digress.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_02: Go ahead.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I think that's true.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I I do have one bound set of books, uh, an encyclopedia.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: We've we've had that forever, like 60 years.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember when my dad bought it, uh, it was I think somebody was going door to door selling them.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_02: No, that's what they did.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_02: My mom, we bought the same.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_02: My mom bought from a guy that came to order, and they did they drank for about three, four hours afterwards.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_02: It was kind of amazing.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, we got this whole set.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: What's happened to those guys?
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: Because they were selling all kinds of stuff, you know, vacuum cleaners.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, they would come in and they would like throw shit on your carpet and then they would click it.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: And Tupperware, I remember Tupperware was a big deal.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: And cosmetics, was that Mary Kay?
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: Was that door-to-door too?
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: And I think so.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_00: My mom always looked forward to the traveling salesman coming by and you know, stopping.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: And she I she never really bought anything, but shortly people come.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: She did.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_02: She had to visit, yeah.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it was the personal contact.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_02: We've lost so much of that.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I don't know.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: Do you have a set of encyclopedias?
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, absolutely.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_02: I still have the set that my mom and my mom and the guys she was drinking with.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I still got those.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_02: And I also still have a beautiful old dictionary, the Webster's Dictionary.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you see, Webster was the name of the guy.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_02: It was Mr.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_02: Webster was the guy who drank with my mom, and he sold the dictionaries too.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_02: He sold the encyclopedias and the dictionary.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: So he was that little kid, right?
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Did they do a TV show about it?
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, he he was like uh Benjamin Button.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_02: He was older when he sold the encyclopedias, but then he got younger and smaller when he was on the TV show.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_02: So it's it's kind of a sad story in a lot of ways.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_02: But thinking about Websters, you know, you remember I don't know if people still do this, but so many people would start talks by saying Websters defines X as, and they give the definition, you know, whatever the theme of the talk was going to be.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_02: Do they people still do that?
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_02: Do they say yeah, Wikipedia defines X as?
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: I was gonna say that things are changing so fast now, but back then they did too.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: You have the Soviet Union and they became Russia, and Poland was part of them.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: And I think there were always a lot of changes.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't really notice them as much.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: And now I'm still confused.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, is is there is does Ukraine still exist or is that part of Russia?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, what about Greenland and and Canada?
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: And so much is going on, Steve.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: I I just blink and there's changes.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_02: It's accelerated now, but it's always been going on.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_02: Things are always changing, like the dictionaries always go out of date, new words or sayings appear seemingly out of nowhere.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, every year in December, every year, the the OED makes this announcement about new words that they've added, you know, the OED old English diaphragm.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_02: Don't get me started on maps of countries, but uh every year they make announcements of hey, we're adding this word, uh, this phrase, or the change changed all the time.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and sometimes saying there were sayings.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know where half of these sayings come from.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh you would hear them all the time.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: My dad had all kinds of sayings.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: What about your dude?
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_02: Oh gosh.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_02: Thing that I think of first when I think of sayings is the old thing, put up your duke.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_02: You know, somebody's gonna fight.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, you know, what did put up your dukes?
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_02: Dukes of Hazard, Dukes of Earl, David Dukes of Earl.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_02: I, you know, I you think anyone gets any of those references I just made?
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: No, you know, very good show.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think the the Duke family had a lot of leather-bound books, though.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just just kind of guessing.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_02: I bet not, you know, and was that I'll call Uncle Sale and get the odds, but I think Uncle Sale's gonna say, Yeah, the odds are close to zero.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: John Snyder, good looking man.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: He was the blonde, right?
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: I think, and he was kind of a hunk.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: And then there was Daisy.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: Do you think I watched that show?
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: I I watched it religiously.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: There was Daisy, and and she's probably a Trumpster.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I always get them confused.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: Was Daisy the one that married Ringo, or did she marry Dan Ackroyd, or was that somebody else?
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_02: It seemed like there were a lot of blondes going around that it was so confusing because Ringo and Dan Aykroyd looked so much alike.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_02: So they could be twins.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_02: So in Ellie May, it just confuses everything even further.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_02: But you know, another one, you know, my dad when he wasn't mowing the lawn, would say things like, Now you're cooking with gas.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, wait, what does that mean?
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_02: Does that mean cooking while you have gas?
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_02: You know, wouldn't you be cooking with electricity or very safe nuclear power?
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_02: Or ooh, even better, clean coal.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_02: And in fact, didn't Stace outlaw that isn't it now cooking with lethal injection?
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_02: See, you know, there's example coal went out of style thanks to Project 2025 and our king, it's making a comeback along with you know black lung disease.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_02: You could even call our king old king coal.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_02: You know, that's right.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_02: But we digress.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_02: Speaking of new terms, though, funny thing happened to me the other day.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_02: Really?
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_02: What?
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_02: I I was on this business trip.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_02: I stopped at a bar, I was gonna shoot a couple pop-ovs, you know, and so I I sit at the bar and I'm sitting next to this old guy, and we, you know, we start talking because you know, we're sitting in a bar, there's nothing else to do, right?
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_02: Other than yeah, we drink, we talk, we drink, we talk.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_02: And this guy just says something strange.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_02: He says that our king is like post-tortoise, post-tortoise, not post-toasties.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_02: No, I've I've had that syndrome a few times, but no, post-toise.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't know what that meant.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_02: I guess if I had my Webster's or maybe even an old English diaphragm with me, I I you know, I could have looked it up, but I I bet they don't even have it.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_02: I bet it's in.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_02: It's probably not in your encyclopedia either.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_00: But you know, no, I I think maybe pole tortoise.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: I might have seen that, but I don't even know what either of those are.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_02: Well, that's that's a total tortoise from Poland.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, yeah, everybody knows that.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, okay.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, well, that makes sense.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_02: But you know, so I didn't know what it meant, but hey, he was buying around, so I just nodded.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_02: I prayed, oh, you're you know, he pretended to knew what he meant.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_02: Well, so next day I get done with the business and I I go back to the bar, you know, shoot a shoot a couple more pop-ups, and I kind of hoped the old guy was there.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_02: Like maybe I could ask him what a post-tourtoise is, and it was, he was sitting in the same chair.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_02: I'd be willing to bet he hadn't moved.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_02: There was actually dust on his hands.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_02: I don't think he actually moved at all, but I had to admit to him, you know, it's like, you know, yesterday you said the thing post tortoise.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_02: I I don't know what that is, old man.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, he had a name, but I already forgot.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_02: So, you know, so he says, yeah, it's what it is, you know.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_02: When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a tortoise balanced on top, that's a post-tortoise.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, but does that really explain anything?
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it just kind of puts the two words together, it doesn't really tell you anything, you know.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_00: I I mean if it was a reference like to Kevin Costner, because you know, my wife thinks that he looks like a tortoise, but but I I don't understand that.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_00: But it it certainly would be unusual to see a tortoise on a post or on a poll.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I was hey, I was confused too.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: Uh yeah, but what does that have to do with uh King Trump?
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_02: I I don't I don't care.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_02: I yeah, he he was buying rounds, so I didn't really ask, you know.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_02: I just thought I didn't want to say anything, but he could tell that I really had no clue what he was talking about.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah so it through through the haze in the bar though, he took another shot and he said, you know, hey, I know you're wondering what this all means, what they have in common.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_02: I said, Well, tortoise on a high pole is like our king, being in the highest position in the land.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_02: Here's how both are in unusual situations and neither belongs there.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_02: And it's obvious that neither got up on the pole by themselves, and both have no idea what to do now or how to get down.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and you wonder what kind of dumbass put him up there to begin with twice.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_02: That makes sense, but maybe he's overthinking it a little bit.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_02: And and I don't over drinking it, definitely.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and you definitely won't find the term post tortoise in any version of my encyclopedia or dictionary.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: I maybe it would be in a bad joke book or in my new Archie comic book, but you know, I think that's good.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: That term sounds kind of negative, though.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if we want to be repeating it too much.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_00: At first, I thought you were talking about Kevin Costner.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't know what it meant, but I didn't want to get in a fight with the guy.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_02: He was buying rounds, you know.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_02: I figured, you know, let him buy buy a few more rounds, but don't blame me.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_02: I actually found it kind of offensive.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, our king has shown us that our biggest problem in this country is the language we speak and the thoughts we have because they're connected, you know.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_02: Language, thoughts create language, language creates thoughts, you know.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_02: Bigger problem than the stock market or people having their rights taken away, or the environment, or our relationship with the world, or the ever-widening gap between the rich and everyone else.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_02: Nope, nope, none of those.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_02: It's language, and it's our woke thoughts and words that will do us in.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: And that gap between the rich and the poor, I don't think that's a negative.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's only recently become a negative, but you know, it helps define who we are as people.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: We don't know how dangerous our thoughts are.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: I know that personally.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: I get scary thoughts all the time.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_00: Most of them have to do with the White Sox.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I wonder, can they repeat as the worst team in the history of baseball this year?
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: I I'm worried, you know, they're projected to win like 47 games.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: That's like 15 games more than they won last year.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_00: I I don't think it's possible.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, Jeff, don't worry.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_02: I I've seen the White Sox play a little bit this year, and oh, they're every bit as bad as they were last year.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_02: So a new record for losses is a real possibility, despite the fact that the Pope is a fan.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_02: You know, sorry, holy father, they're they're gonna lose a bunch of games.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_02: And but you know, also in no time, life is gonna be simple like that Archie comic book, where it's just, you know, you gotta worry if Mr.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_02: Lodge is home so you can uh hit the couch with Veronica.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_02: You know, that's all you really gotta worry about.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_02: And we owe it all to our king, good folks at Project 2025.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you may wonder why I say that, Jeff.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_02: Here's why.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_02: Next year, our king is going to put into law a new version of our language, which again is a version of our thoughts, because language creates thoughts, lots of language, you know, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_02: It's gonna be called Project 2026 after dark.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it's kind of like Council Bluffs after dark, but you know, dark is gonna include this whole section of philosophy of words and phrases, some of which we couldn't say anymore, and some we need to say all the time.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_02: It's all to help help us think the same thoughts, which of course is essential to the harmony they want.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_02: Our king has said it'll be the best harmony ever, be beautiful harmony, three part light haste of falsato.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_02: Actually, Jeff, I actually have a copy with me here in the studio, the new project 2026 After Dark Bible.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_00: I've got a copy of it too, and that's what I like about the king, because he gave everybody an advanced copy because he doesn't want to deport citizens, but you know, he will have to if they won't follow you know his executive order.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, if they start giving all stray thoughts, yeah, but he's giving us a chance.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: Isn't that all we really want?
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: Is we just want a chance.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm kind of excited.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm thinking that this list of new words, you know, they're probably violent, degrading.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I think we kind of could guess what those words would be.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: They're probably pretty disgusting, right?
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, yeah.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_00: What what do you what do you see there?
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_00: Well, let's see.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: The first two words that are removed from our language and from our vocabulary are slavery and the Holocaust.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: I I guess that's technically three words, but uh, but you get the point.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes those phrases get used as weapons, and that's just wrong.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_02: Only weapon anyone should be using is a hand, of course.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, we all know that.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_02: Plus, at the end of the day, what can we do about either issue?
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_02: Or in the past, it's it's just gonna make people, it's gonna make white nationalists, republicans, and Nazis feel bad.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_02: That's right.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_02: There are good people on both sides, especially in the Nazi Party and the KKK, you know.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, we have to look at the big picture.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's not just the words, it's what the words represent.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_00: And that big picture is about education and about our history.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_00: You know, what do we teach our kids and what language should they be allowed to use?
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it's up to us now to teach them the right things and not let them start parroting the wrong things.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_00: Oh and lately we we've had a culture of hate.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: You know, all of a sudden we hate racism, we hate bigotry, we hate rich people.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_00: That's all gonna change.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: And with Project 26 After Dark, the king's gonna fix this.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_02: Education is one of the most dangerous things out there because an educated country is an unruly country.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_02: People start thinking that's thinking the same thoughts.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_02: Or thinking, they're not in harmony, they're not thinking the same thoughts.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_02: Harbor and Columbia, perfect examples.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_02: You know, most Ivy League students have vocabularies, you know, a lot of words, right?
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_02: Well, that's where it all goes, bad.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_02: Firstly, educate our kids, and before you know it, you're using words that are both woke and cancel culture-ish.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_00: Is that a word?
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_02: I I guess it doesn't look cancel culture-ish, but you can't really tell by the name anymore.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you really can't.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, exactly.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_00: But you but you're absolutely right.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_00: And it doesn't mean that race relations and anti-Semitism are unimportant, not at all.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_00: But let's leave those issues to the experts.
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_00: We don't need to be saying those words.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: Let's leave them to uh, you know, a select few, like Marjorie Taylor Green, who has never stopped talking about Black Lives Matter and Jewish space lasers.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: She's an expert on this, and oh yeah, you know, she has a platform, so why don't we let her use it?
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_00: She might be the most important person of our time for as long as we will be here during this time.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so do they ban any other words or phrases that we should be prepared for?
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_02: Um I'm guessing just some of the basic swear words, you know, like the F-bomb.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_02: People try to get rid of that forever.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_02: And I don't know that we could ever really get rid of it, but you know, we probably have gone overboard with allowing profanity everywhere, and sometimes even on our own show.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_00: I I don't really see any swear words on this list, but a few more that have been banned for 2026 are feminism, abortion, and trans.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if trans is short for something else or but uh but those are all banned.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_02: Well, yeah.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, if you're gonna make those things illegal, why give those words a spot in our new improved language, right?
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's all just logical.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's very true.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_00: Here is radical but common sense idea for 2026.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_00: He actually is eliminating three letters from the alphabet, D, E, and I will be removed from the alphabet.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_00: So we won't even have a chance to use that term in the future.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I think that's fair.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_02: Might cause a spelling problem with certain words, but like every issue, our king is creating and solving all these problems out there.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_02: He's attacking the big problems head on, things like letters and DEI and words.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_02: Most presidents probably waste their time with, oh, I don't know, the economy or wars or foreign relations.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_02: But no, he's really getting on to the important things.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, whenever you take medicine, sometimes uh the medicine doesn't work and people die.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_02: It's called progress.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_02: And that's really what our our healthcare is going to be all about, I think, is dying.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_02: I mean progress.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: Bill Maher says it best when he says, you know, we should not be taking any medicine.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's just all about being fat.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we should have no vaccines or any of that.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what's really important is to is to focus on the right things and to have a positive attitude about that.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of changes that are coming and words that you know are now banned.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_00: And and this is the kind of big picture stuff that we elected this president for.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_00: For example, we should no longer say Black Lives Matter or the Democratic Party or climate change.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_00: They are the obvious ones.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_02: And maybe you could add to that list Greenland and maybe Canada.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_02: Because I'm assuming with renaming of everything, uh, both of those states would get new titles.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_02: You know, maybe Trumpania.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe combine the two together with that name, and that would be the largest state.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my gosh, they probably have 800 electoral votes, and it would have the king's name, like like Georgia, you know.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_02: But maybe we should also look at the words that we need to say every day.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_02: Because you you know, some we can't say, but some we have to say, you know.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, what do you see on that list?
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_02: Top of that list, you've got woke.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_02: You know, like in the morning when the alarm clock goes off, you know.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_02: I'm I'm confused.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_02: So aren't we supposed to hate everything that's woke?
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_02: Why didn't you get rid of that word?
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that does seem weird, but but I think I get the point.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because keep in mind everything that is bad is woke.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_00: And since the definition has never really been defined, it's a word that can be used nonstop to talk about anything that you don't like.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_00: And in some ways, woke can be a noun or a verb, you know, it's kind of like the F word.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: You can use that in so many different ways.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I think woke can be used the the same way.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: It and and it's such it's the most popular word in the Republican dictionary.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_00: So it would be very hard to remove it.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if they could communicate without being able to use that that word in um every sentence.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_02: My mom always used to say that I was a really good boy when I was sleeping.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_02: So this is kind of the same thing.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_02: When you're when you're awake, when you're woke, that's when.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_02: Problems can happen when you're asleep, you don't do anything bad, you know.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_02: I forget it.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_02: I guess I was just being fucking woke.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_02: Those those are okay, right?
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_02: I I still say you can say that.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, absolutely.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_00: And and you can put rigged in there too, because that's yeah a word, very popular word.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you were rigged to be woke, you know, fucking woke.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_02: So or I woke up in the rig.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_02: I woke I rigged the wake up wake idea.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_02: We'll like we'll work on that.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_02: You know, yeah, and and we'll work up that a little bit.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_00: And rigged can be attached to election because everybody knows that you know, all elections are rigged, that you know, well at least the ones that the king doesn't win.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_00: Well he wins all of them.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: And and speaking of words that the king uses, don't shy away from using short words and two-syllable words, because those are going to be very in now, kind of like leather books.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: Words like ugly and stupid and dumb and bad and whore and sick and fat.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_00: You know, those kinds of words.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_02: You drop those on your foot or leave those on an L train, it's just like those leather books.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_02: This volume, this tome takes away the need to be educated, which means you know, nobody's gonna have to go to Harvard now.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, well, Harvard isn't in the vocabulary anymore.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: That's been taken away.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, you know, along with Ukraine and and Yale, and yeah, you know, they're all gone.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_00: Gaza will be gone in 2027.
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: For now, it's still going to be there, but yeah.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_02: Well, that's that's when they're gonna build the resorts there, right?
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_02: Sure.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_02: What about racism?
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_02: Is that gone as well?
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_02: And the anti-Semitism?
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_00: Not at all.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_00: Racism is such an important issue.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: Project 2026 believes that the goal is to eliminate all racism in the future.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_00: And same with anti-Semitism.
• 23:54
  SPEAKER_00: That will be here forever.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: The definition might change, but it's extremely important.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_02: I can see that already.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, I think the way that a lot of the Republicans are using that word might have been in the old Project 2025 report.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_02: But, you know, and I'm I'm just spitballing here, but it seems like making stereotypical jokes, spreading rumors that Jewish families are controlling the world's finances, spreading rumors that Jews are sneaking illegals into our country, and of course, the Jews are controlling the weather and the media.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_02: That's not the anti-Semitic.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_02: No, it's only lack of support for Israel.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_02: That's anti-Semitic.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_02: Do I have that right?
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_02: You do.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_02: You you've got it.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_02: Well, Jeff, you know, it looks like we got some studying to do before the end of the year.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I understand that this Friday on HBO, Bill Maher is doing a tutorial on why the Democrats are to blame for everything that will happen in the future, even though it hasn't happened yet.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_02: What a what a guy.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna check it out.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, he really knows the importance of woke.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I I think the the best thing about Bill Maher is that he's identified using a term as the sole reason everybody hates Democrats, but they love Republicans, even though they use the same term.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_00: They use the same term and they want to take over countries and violent overthrows of elections and things.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: Those are at the same level as using the term whoa.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: I have to give Bill Marr credit for for figuring that out.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I'm glad somebody did.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, you know, Jeff, we are just about to get kicked out of eccentric Lady Land Studios here, but I think because of this tremendous gift that our king is giving us, this Project 2026 After Dark, I think we should give the creators of that something as well.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_02: We should give them a gift equal to or reciprocal for the gifts that they are giving us.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_02: So, Johnny, what do we have for the creators of Project 2026 After Dark?
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_01: Right, Steve?
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_01: Those happy people involved in Projects 2025 and 6 will be even happier when they receive the Ronco Moving Golden Finger Award.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_01: The Moving Finger of History will pause before moving on to show these people just how much we love their agenda.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_01: We are proud to join the American people in giving these guys the finger.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_01: This has been a words of play production in association with garbled audio media.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_01: Read all about Steven Jeff at their website, stepencheff.com.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_01: This is Johnny speaking.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_01: For example, we have to say vodka, another, and double.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_01: But we can never say old, wrinkled, or wet.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_01: It makes for such a nice two part harmony.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_01: Good night.