Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / How to know if you're in a toxic relationship?

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How to know if you're in a toxic relationship? · The Mental Healness Podcast

• 0:01
  What is going on? Beautiful people.
• 0:02
  Welcome to another episode of the nurses is code.
• 0:04
  I'm your favorite self-aware, narcissus mr.
• 0:07
  Lee hammock better known as mental illness across all social
• 0:10
  media platforms. This your first time seeing my
• 0:12
  face are here, my lovely voice. I'm a clinically diagnosed
• 0:15
  Narcissus, and I use my platform on social media to raise
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  awareness for MPD. Get more people into therapy and
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  also validate the victim survivors.
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  And thrivers of said, disorders are toxic people say talk to
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  trace. Today's episode is going to be
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  about how do you know That you're in a toxic relationship
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  with a narcissistic person. How do you know you're in a
• 0:33
  relationship with a narcissist? So like, like, usually right
• 0:37
  before we get started, today's episode check out myself, love
• 0:40
  journal on Amazon. Lee hammock, I love me a
• 0:43
  self-love Journal. If you already have the journal,
• 0:45
  you liked it, please give it a little.
• 0:46
  Give it a good rating on Amazon. If you if it's in your heart,
• 0:49
  you don't have to no pressure, no pressure.
• 0:51
  So yeah, yeah. Back to the time of the way.
• 0:53
  Hey yo, how do we know? How do you know if you're in a
• 0:58
  toxic relationship? They narcissistic person.
• 1:01
  So I always tell people the first thing that you want to
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  kind of the first thing. The first Telltale sign, if you
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  were to tell attacks relationship, is your feelings?
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  How do you feel now in the beginning, right now?
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  Right now, as you're watching this, as you, listen to this,
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  how do you feel about your relationship?
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  You feel like your relationship is healthy.
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  Would you would you wish your relationship on your best
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  friend? Usually on your brother or your
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  Or sister that you love somebody that you love a lot.
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  You mean, would you wish your exact relationship situation on
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  someone else? Could you see somebody else live
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  in your relationship and you being happy for them, like in
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  its current form, not in the beginning, not in the beginning,
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  when things were good. Now, it's not were times were
• 1:47
  good right now after whatever you've been through.
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  They've cheated on you. If they lied to you, if you
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  discover something, you know, some deep dark secrets, whatever
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  it is they manipulated you there gasps, let you whatever it.
• 2:00
  Is, do you think that yo are you in a position right now to take?
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  Like what do you think? He'll say how do you feel?
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  Would you wish this relationship with somebody else?
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  Like are you are, you always trying to look internally to do?
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  An internal inventory on your feelings and your thoughts and
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  things of that nature. Like, what is going on inside of
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  your mind right now? How are you feeling about this
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  person? How are you feeling about the
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  relationship and you know as a whole you mean how do you feel?
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  It's always like checking Check. Check internally.
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  Your intuition will tell you a lot y'all.
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  Your intuition typically tells you the truth, because your
• 2:36
  intuition your gut that gut feeling is there to protect you.
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  So, how do you feel check inside of yourself?
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  You some saying, take it off of you.
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  Like I said, put if you can't, if you have a hard time, like
• 2:48
  thinking about your own relationship, put your
• 2:50
  relationship on somebody else and say, hey, this must, let me
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  imagine my brother. It is relationship in this exact
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  position. Would I be happy for him or what
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  I've been telling him to The hell out of there.
• 3:01
  He said I'm saying there's there's one way you can do it
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  right there. Another way you can do it.
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  Like yeah. It's are you recording that?
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  You feel the need to record things to prove that to prove
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  that you're telling the truth. You some saying to validate your
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  sanity intact and things like that.
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  Are you feel like that you feel yourself recording things on
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  feel like you said, you have to have her secret recorder out
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  just to prove that you're telling the truth to this
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  person. You don't mean, do you have
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  these? Do you feel like these feel the
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  need to write things down just to stay it.
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  To stay grounded within reality in this relationship.
• 3:34
  Do you feel like that you feel like you need to do that type of
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  stuff that you feel like you're going crazy?
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  You something that's another way right there?
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  Do you feel like you're going crazy?
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  Do you feel like life doesn't make sense that you feel like
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  the person that you're with right now?
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  Do you feel like they don't make sense to you?
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  Do you feel like they keep lying to you manipulating you and do
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  they put their hands on you? You say I'm saying are they
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  putting their hands on you? That's another way to tell right
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  there y'all are they putting their hands on you in?
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  Any way shape or form? You don't mean.
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  I know people just I know some people don't consider it,
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  domestic violence, whatever, unless they get punished or Slap
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  Ya, if they push you really hard, they push you on the
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  ground. If they put their hands around
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  your throat area, right here. If they restraint, if they keep
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  you from living leaving a room, that's the message that they
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  could be said of domestic. Violence are there, I best
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  putting their hands on you and what not?
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  Are they doing things like that? You don't mean, all they doing
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  things like that, you ain't Another way and this is one.
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  Got this is right here. Y'all this way right here is
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  bear with me right here. Y'all just bear with me right
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  here. Y'all know, I'm not trying to
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  victim blame and whatnot. Yeah, I know that's not not my
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  intent but it isn't. This might not even come up with
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  victim-blaming. Y'all is a lie, that's not
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  victim-blaming at all. I don't know what the hell you
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  talking about but what are your what are your family and friends
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  saying you tell him saying, what are your family and friends
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  saying about this person or your family and friends your closest
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  people to you, trying to get you away from Your partner have,
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  they told you a lot of they had, they tried to get you to see
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  something that you are not willing to see, you know me, the
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  all your family, and friends, consistently trying to get you
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  to leave this person to tell you, tell you, there's been,
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  there's more fish in the sea or trying to get you out of trying
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  to get you to safety on a fiery or they fearing for your safety
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  in this relationship space in this relationship, Dynamic, use,
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  I'm saying, are they doing any of those things right there to,
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  you know, to try to cope? We try to make things better for
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  you. If you ask yourself this
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  question right there, how are you feeling right now?
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  You're right. How are you feeling right now?
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  Like say, oh, they are your family and friends trying to
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  scare you away from this type from this relationship.
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  I know sometimes family friends, can, you know, they can just be,
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  they can just not like the person overall but it's
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  everybody in your life till you to get away from this person.
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  You know, take a, you know, take a, like a friendship,
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  friendship, family member inventory.
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  There's nobody like this person, but You do you fight?
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  Do you mean, are you finding yourself constantly Defending
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  Your Partner against something that they have done to you to
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  your family and friends? Oh, you just don't have you.
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  You find yourself saying, oh, you just don't know him.
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  Like I do you just don't know her.
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  Like, I do you suppose a y'all don't really know the truth.
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  Y'all only know what you see, you know?
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  But it don't believe everything you hear, blah, blah, blah, boo,
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  boo. Boo bee bee bee.
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  You ain't are you in another way to tell right here y'all.
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  If you Natasha relationship space.
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  Are you do you feel isolated? Because you know narcissistic
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  toxic people like to isolate you away from your friends and
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  family. Do you feel like you lost a lot
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  of friends and family? Not just through natural, you
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  know, occurrences, you have moved across the country,
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  something like that. Do you feel like every time you
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  get ready to go out with every time you were getting ready to
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  go out with one of your friends and family members are going to
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  hang out with somebody else? That wasn't your partner.
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  Did they make a scene about it? You doing, did they caused her?
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  What do they call it? Did they cause a ruckus?
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  You know, they cause a Ruckus when you get ready to go out or
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  whatever, they make it seem like you were just it was the your
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  you were the end-of-the-world type stuff.
• 7:07
  Yeah, I mean, did they make him feel like every time you get
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  ready to go out with your friends and family, they, they
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  get angry or they gave you the silent treatment or something
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  like that? You don't mean, how do you
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  think? Like seriously take a look at
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  that. Yeah, this is just me.
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  Just coming up with signs. You tell that you might be an
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  attachment relationship space. You don't mean I have you
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  experienced narcissistic taxi rage, You know, narcissistic,
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  toxic rage is not just your normal argument or screaming
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  screaming the other narcissistic rage.
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  And then that person say the person that, you know, and you
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  you think you love when they, they leave their body and they
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  have an out-of-body experience when they're yelling screaming.
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  It's in seems like a monster has replaced your partner or your
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  parent. You mean your mom monster has
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  replaced your boss or something like that.
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  You don't like their eyes might change other people's might be
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  super dilated or whatever. They might seem like they might
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  be having a psychotic break. Wait, have you have they done
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  that to you? These are.
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  Did you find yourself walking on eggshells in this relationship
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  space to avoid that rage because you don't ever want to
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  experience that again you never thought they were capable of it
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  but now did you see? They're capable of it.
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  You don't never, you never want to experience again.
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  You know have you experienced narcissistic toxic rate?
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  Have you been on the receiving end of that you know me and also
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  have you been on the receiving end of side the silent treatment
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  or being ghosted. I mean that goes to being
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  stonewalled, you know how you've been.
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  Silent treatment is used to punish you.
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  Have you ever tried to hold this person accountable?
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  And instead of, you know, taking accountability, they stop
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  talking to you, you know, have this person, you know, stop
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  talking to you. I'll give you this out of
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  treatment based on a perceived, slight, not even a real.
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  Slight, a perceived one, you know, me has that happened.
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  Have you say, hey, have you find and you found that to happen?
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  You know, because a lot of people knew sighs relationship
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  Dynamics. You don't even know what you've
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  done to the person. You No, you don't even know what
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  you've done to the person and they started give you the silent
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  treatment or you try to hold them accountable for something
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  that they have actually done. And they just, they just refuse
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  to talk to you. You don't have, you been on the
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  receiving end of the silent treatment and whatnot, you know,
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  because they will give you the silent treatment not all
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  narcissist or toxic people rage on you, you know, me not all of
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  them will absolutely rage on you.
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  Some of them will just start talk to you.
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  Some of them were not engaged with you know some of them you
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  know and doing things like that. Another way to possibly tell.
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  If you're a Natasha relationship is your birthday's and trips
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  vacations. Holidays.
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  How those, how are those on a consistent basis?
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  Or they always ruining vacations and birthdays and holidays and
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  trips and things of that nature. You know, mean, I'll have you
• 9:45
  had a good birthday. I haven't had a good birthday in
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  years. He's I'm saying, they are they
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  consistently ruining birthdays and trips and holidays and
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  vacation. Critter Christmas is her
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  terrible Thanksgiving. You, you look, you thankful when
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  things get Is over because you do not a lot of narcissistic
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  people and talk to people during holidays and vacations and
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  things like that. They just that's just part of
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  the the dynamic sometimes, when you're dealing with a toxic
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  person, or you're dealing with a toxic relationship, it will ruin
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  your holiday. They will ruin your events.
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  They will ruin a lot of different situations you may
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  just because narcissistic people, you know, we do, we like
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  the like to be shining on us. And doing we also holidays
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  birthdays vacations is just too much, too many emotions going on
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  at the same time, too much I like came out y'all too much
• 10:31
  only place my mic. Not recommend me a good camera
• 10:36
  so I can. I use one of those wireless
• 10:38
  mics. I need a wireless mic.
• 10:39
  This one has a string on it. Yeah.
• 10:41
  But right now uses Sony's eveyone.
• 10:45
  So I got recommend a good camera recording their use of the
• 10:47
  lavalier wireless mic. Let me know.
• 10:50
  But yeah, that's how it goes together.
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  So, holidays vacations and things like that.
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  Okay, systole ruined is your partner, consistently doing
• 10:56
  that, and you might be any type of relationship is your partner.
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  Super jealous of your success and doesn't hype you up.
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  Doesn't support you, you mean, do you feel like you're part?
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  Is competing with you. You don't mean you feel like
• 11:07
  your part is intentionally trying to sabotage your life or
• 11:10
  intentionally trying to hold you back from success.
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  You know different That Never Shout Never Shout your Praises,
• 11:15
  you know Whispers your Praises, but shouts your failures, you
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  know mean how they how are they with the kids?
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  You know do they disconnected me mostly from the kids.
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  You said I'm saying did they treat their kids like compare
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  little competitors or they love their kids?
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  Do you actually feel like this person is loving you, you know
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  me. And I've been on people like
• 11:35
  knocking, ours is actually love you.
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  How are they treating you? How are they treating those
• 11:38
  children, you know, how are they treating those children, how are
• 11:42
  they treating you? There's a, there's a plethora of
• 11:43
  different things that you can ask yourself, did you figure
• 11:46
  out? If you were to attach
• 11:47
  relationship with my y'all, it's a very unique space to be in.
• 11:49
  Like I said, there's a bunch of other stuff that I can't let
• 11:52
  something slip my mind. Yeah.
• 11:53
  But it was y'all hope you all enjoyed this list.
• 11:56
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• 11:58
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• 12:01
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• 12:11
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• 12:13
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• 12:24
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