Latest / Celeste The Therapist / EP 504 Joy as an Act of Resistance

Transcript

EP 504 Joy as an Act of Resistance · Celeste The Therapist

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Hey, hey, thank you all so much for joining another episode of Celeste's
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Therapist Podcast. My name is Celeste. If you're new here, I just want to say thank
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you so much for being here. I really appreciate you.
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What we're doing on this podcast is we are learning how to
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understand what's going on with us and ways we can work on shifting. I
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always find that we get stuck in some of the ways that we think
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because we don't have any other way of thinking. So I want
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you to use this podcast as a tool to help you on your journey. So
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I encourage like a notebook, look at it as a class, right?
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Grab your notebook, grab your pen, take notes,
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go back to the notes. Cause every single week we're talking about something
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new. And if you want to learn more about me,
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you can go to celestatherapist.com or I have a
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wellness center, stwit.com. You can go there. to
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find out more about me. Today we're talking about joy as
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an act of resistance. It's something that's been really
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heavily on my spirit. I've been struggling with
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having a lot of feelings around the things that are
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happening around the world. I'm working with
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people every day, so I'm constantly in community and
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talking to people about how they're struggling. And
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I realized people feel very hopeless
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or helpless in some situations. And so
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my goal today is to help you, if that's you, if you feel
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like, I've been struggling, feeling hopeless, I've been feeling helpless, I've
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been struggling with a lot of rage, a lot of emotions. I
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want you to learn a new way of operating so that
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you don't allow it to take over because our mind goes
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at the pace that we take it. And so if we're only focusing on
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all the things that we don't have control over, we are
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going to find ourselves struggling and being in a dark place. So
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my goal is to give you a new way of thinking about it. So we're talking about
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joy as an act of resistance. So first I want to define joy, right? And
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also if you're listening, this podcast is on YouTube. So
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if you go to Celeste Therapist, you can find this podcast, episode
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504. So joy is a profound and uplifting emotion characterized by
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feelings of happiness, contentment, and fulfillment. It
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often arises from positive experiences, connections with others.
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Joy can be both spontaneous and cultivated. allowing
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you to find light even in challenging circumstances. Joy
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serves as a source of energy and motivation, empowering you to embrace life
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fully and engage in your personal growth and transformation. You
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know, that's one of the things that I find myself having often
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is joy. And there's a lot of chaos happening. I
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can see the chaos. I talk to people in the chaos. I sit with
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people in grieving moments. And those moments are very
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hard. But I promise you, what keeps me going is the joy
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that I'm finding myself being able to cultivate. And it's
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something that I had to learn how to do. If you
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told me 20 years ago it was possible to have joy,
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I promise you I wouldn't have believed you. It's something
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kind of like if you're building a muscle, I had to work on cultivating it,
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right? That's the purpose of today's podcast is I want to help you
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learn how you can do that with your own life. So that's
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the definition of joy. Let's talk about resistance, right? That's
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something that's important I want you to think about. So understanding resistance, right?
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So resistance refers to the act of opposing or
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standing against something, particularly oppressive structures, societal
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norms, or personal challenges. It embodies the
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struggle to maintain your identity, values, and beliefs in
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the face of adversity. Resistance is a proactive stance against
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the status quo, where you assert your right to joy, well-being,
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and self-expression. It highlights the importance of fighting against
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apathy and exhaustion caused by external pressures, using
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joy as a powerful tool for change and empowerment. Resistance
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is something I feel like I've always had. I've
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never been somebody that went with the status quo. I never cared
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about how people viewed me. I thought about where
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I wanted to go, even if it wasn't where others were going. Years
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ago, when I started coming on social media, probably around
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like 2010 talking about mental health. You know, it wasn't
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the popular thing, the way mental health is talked about now. In
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2010, it wasn't talked about then. But because I got so much
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value out of working on myself, I felt a passion
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to want to help others by doing that. And it literally
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started with just posting quotes on social media. I
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feel like I've always been in a resistance space of
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not going with the norm, not doing the status quo, like
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the norm in America didn't feel right, right? And I was
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always mindful of that. And in 2025, even
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more so, you know, if I was like that back then, like 15, 20 years
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ago, imagine how much more I'm like that now, right? So
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that's kind of what resistance means. Now,
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when you together joy and resistance, it creates a dynamic interplay
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where you can harness your joy to fuel your resistance
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against oppression, ultimately leading to personal and
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collective transformation. I need to
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say that because I need you to understand, like, this emotion chart that I'm putting up
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right here, this is from BEAM. It's a really great organization. you
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can hold on to more than one emotion. You don't have to just have one. You
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know, when I'm working with people, they may be struggling with their parent because of how they
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are, how they're not accepting, but they love their parent, and they
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struggle, right? And I say, you know, you can love your parent and not like how they
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treat you. Like, you can hold on to two emotions. I think in
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America, we look at things as black and white. We don't look at the gray. So
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knowing that, like, yes, there's rage, right? There's so
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many hard things that are happening that we don't have control
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over. But does that mean that I don't deserve joy?
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I've heard people say, I wanted
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to have this birthday party, but I feel bad because of everything that's going
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on in the world. It's like, so do you stop creating
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joy because of everything that's happening in the world? Mind you, everything that's happening
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in the world, you don't have control over. It's not about ignoring
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what is happening, but it's also not about allowing
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what's happening to take over your life. Right. That's the
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message that I want to share with you today. Um, because I
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know a lot of times it's hard to do that. I
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was listening to a podcast and, um, it was, gosh,
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I can't think of the name of it. Um, 10% happier, 10% happier.
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And it was a lady on there. She's, she was like, you know, I got, I
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got bad news from the oncologist. And she said,
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because Peter, I think his name is Peter, who hosts it. He said,
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well, he's talking about her active resistance
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and how she cultivates being present, right? Because
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being present is where peace is found. And she said,
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I have this report, but I also, my kids are good. Like,
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this is happening and that's happening. She's like, there's so many other things
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happening. She was like, it's easy to just stick with
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that diagnosis and what the oncologist said and
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focus on the hard thing, right? That's easy to do. She was
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like, but I have to be intentional on making sure I'm
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reminding myself all of the other great things that are happening. Right.
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And so that's something that I want to remind you of what's going on, even,
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you know, there's so many hard things that are happening. And,
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um, even though I don't really watch the news, I talk to people and
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I'm sitting with people every day and, and grieving in different ways,
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um, for different reasons. And, um, it's very
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hard sometimes. Excuse me. Sometimes I'll
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say to myself, like, I don't know how I'm able to do this. Right.
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And, um, those moments where it gets hard. And
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I'm very mindful and intentional on doing things that
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bring me joy, taking care of my mental health, taking care
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of my physical health, right, allowing self-care in my
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life. And so there's a sense of peace that
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comes over me, right? So it's not that I'm walking around
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all joyous and peaceful all the time. There's moments of rage that
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happens, right? But I don't allow those moments to take over,
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right? Because I know how powerful the mind is. And I know my mind
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is looking for a direction from me. So I'm very
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mindful of what's going on. I want to share
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something from Audre Lorde. She was a writer. She
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was an amazing woman. And she said, you know, joy provides the
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energy for change, right? Because whether you realize it
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or not, energy transfers, right? You could be around somebody, and let's say
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they're always talking about, oh, this is wrong, and that's wrong, and never
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nothing going right. You'll find yourself feeling drained. And
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you could be around somebody that has so much energy, they're peaceful, and
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they're talking about all these good things that they got going on, and you can leave there
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feeling motivated. That's energy. So Joy provides the
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energy for change. Lorde discusses how embracing joy and
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the erotic can empower you to resist oppression and
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create meaningful change in your life and community.
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Her perspective highlights that joy is not merely just
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a fleeting emotion, but a powerful force
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that fuels resilience and activism. By
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cultivating joy, you can find the strength to challenge the status quo
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and engage in transformative actions that promote personal and
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collective liberation. And I think about people that are activists and
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on the ground and that are working to create change.
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And I really want you to continue to do that. But
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I also want to make sure you're cultivating joy. I also want to
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make sure you're cultivating care and wellness for yourself because
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this work is not ending tomorrow, right? The
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things that are happening is not going to go away next week. And
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I don't want you to succumb to the pressures of
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everything that's going on because you didn't have
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the ability to work on inserting some
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joy in creating something different in your life. It's
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easy to get locked in in this work, especially when you have a passion and
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you want to help people. Somebody like me, I don't like bullies. That's
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the one area of my life that has always been constant. I
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don't like it when people take advantage of people. I struggle with that, my emotions
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around it. And so I'm living in a time in
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2025 where it's like, I
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wake up, I can't believe that happened. I can't believe this man said that. Like,
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it's like you're so baffled by it, right? So
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for me, I keep reminding myself of my purpose
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and why I'm here and the things that I'm doing to help me, like, be
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okay. And so for people that are, like, activists and on
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the streets and doing this work, I really want you to make sure that
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you're allowing yourself to bring in joy, because if you don't,
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like, you can break down your system just by
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all of that energy just being in you and not going anywhere. So,
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you know, that's joy, that's resistance, right? Let's talk
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about the benefits of experiencing joy, bringing joy into
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your life. Because one of the things on this podcast, if
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you're new, is like, we're going to talk about the issues. We're also going
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to talk about solutions and why it happens so that you
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can work on creating change. So one
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of the benefits is improved mental health, right? So if
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you work on creating joy, it can help reduce your stress and
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anxiety, and it can also enhance your mood.
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It can allow you to have more of a positive mood and
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help combat some sadness and depression that you may be feeling. So
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if you've been struggling with stress and anxiety and some
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sadness and depression, allowing joy
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into your life can help offset that, right? I'm not saying
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it's going to change. I'm not saying you're never going to be sad or never going to feel anxious, but
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Creating joy, allowing joy into your life can really help that. Another
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way you can be helped by allowing joy in
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your life is increased resilience. So you have
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the coping mechanism. Joy provides you with the emotional resources you
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need to cope with challenges and setbacks. When
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people look at my story and they look at everything that I've done,
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you would never know all
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of the things that I've gone through. You would never know all of the doors that
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was closed. You would never know all of the ways that I
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had to struggle to get to this place, especially as a black woman. But
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the thing that's helped me is me thinking about, OK, my
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future. I continue to look at my future self. But also,
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I allow joy into my life. I allow things that
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I love in my life. I'm taking care of myself. So increased
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resilience happens when you allow joy. Strengthen
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social connections. So joy often arises from social interactions and
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shared experiences. I always say like, when
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you do, we're not meant to do life alone. And when you're in community,
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something powerful happens, energy is transferred. Building
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and maintaining strong relationships can enhance resilience as
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supportive networks provide encouragement and help during the
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tough times. And speaking of the community,
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I created an online community called Shift Community, where
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you can go. It's not on social media. That was my
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goal, not to create something that was on social media. But there's
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different spaces on there. And I'm going to be building the spaces as
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we continue to grow. But right now, there's a discussion board where
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we can discuss And the two spaces that I created was gratitude, because
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that's important for me, especially in times like this, and also
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healing your inner child space, right? And so this space
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is a way for community to happen, because I'm always talking about
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community and how important it is. I know people
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live all around the world, finances or not, Your
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finances doesn't allow some spaces for you to be in, right? So
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God laid it on my heart to create this space so
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that people can come together and find community outside
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of social media where there's not a lot of distractions. So being
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in community is something that can really help with
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the way that you're feeling, because when you're by
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yourself, those negative thoughts can end up taking over.
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Besides increased resilience, another way is it can enhance creativity
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and problem solving. So when you're allowing joy in your life, your
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mind will be more open, right? The joy fosters a
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sense of openness and curiosity, allowing you to think creatively and
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explore new ideas. This is so true for me. Where
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I'm at now, like I admire people that be like, oh, I know what I want to do, right? They
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have this plan laid out. I didn't have a plan laid out. I didn't know. I
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just knew I wanted to help people. I didn't know what it would look like. I never could
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have imagined anything like what I'm doing to the level that I'm doing right now.
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But me allowing joy in my life, taking
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care of myself, allows my mind to be open to
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the possibilities, right? If my mind is in a dark space, what
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possibilities are there but darkness? Right? So I
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want you to remember that, like, because some people may feel guilty, like, oh, well, how
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can I work on creating joy when all this is happening? Guess
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what? All this is happening, whether I choose to create joy or not, it's going
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to happen. It's happening. Right? So I really want you to
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work on shifting your perspective around it. Also, it
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can increase your motivation, right? Experiencing joy can boost
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motivation and engagement in various activities, personal
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and professional. And then also greater
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life satisfaction, right? If you work on creating joy
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in your life, your sense of purpose start to look different, right?
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Joy often comes from engaging in activities that
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align with your values and your passion. This
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alignment can lead to a deeper sense of purpose. And
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also, you know, you'll have a positive outlook on
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your circumstances, right? So regular experiences of joy can
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help you develop a more optimistic perspective, make it easier
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to focus on the positive aspects of life and cultivate gratitude.
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So, you know, these are some things that are
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important to think about as you are working on.
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So these are some things that is so important for you
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to think about as you are working on like
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changing up your algorithm in your head. And the last thing
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is your physical health benefits, right? If you allow
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joy into your life, I promise you, you'll notice a
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difference in your physical wellness. So your immune
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system will be improved, right? Joy can have a positive effect on physical health,
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including boosting your immune system, and then longevity. So
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studies have shown that people who experience higher levels of joy and
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positive emotions tend to have longer lifespans as
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joy is associated with the healthier lifestyle. choices,
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and reduced and chronic diseases. So
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there you have it. Those are some ways and reasons why
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creating joy can be beneficial and helpful to you. I don't want
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to just say, oh, create joy. I want you to know why it's important to
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create joy. And then you may be like, but Celeste, what are
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some practical ways to cultivate joy? Because that's
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a real question. Celeste, you're telling me to create joy. What
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does that realistically look like? As you can see
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on, if you're on YouTube, some practical ways and
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all of these ways that I'm about to list are free, right?
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Because I don't want people to allow finances
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to stop them from creating the things that can help
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them in their journey, right? I'm all about starting where you
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are, using what you have. I created this podcast because
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of it. I created this podcast because I wanted to provide
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people with a resource that was free for them to
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be able to work on their journey. I just hate
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that in America, they allow
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for things that we need to be
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looked at as something that's attached to money. right?
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And I know we need money to survive, but I also know that it's
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not available for everyone. And I don't want people to feel hopeless because they
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don't have the financial means. That's why I say use this podcast as
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a way, take notes, right? Get your notebook. And then
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obviously my shift community, like go into that community, start
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cultivating like relationships So
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the first thing is practicing gratitude, always important, right? Two,
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engage in activities that you love. It could be something from
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like learning how to knit. For me, it was gardening, right?
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It could be music, dancing in front of the TV. It
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could be reading, right? Think about the things that you love. It could be drawing, right?
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It could be writing. If you're a writer, start writing, right? It
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doesn't have to be attached to a publishing company to write. Like
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I said, I started coming on social media, posting quotes.
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I wanted to work with people in some capacity, but
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I didn't know what that would look like. But I started posting quotes. And
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from posting quotes, I have a whole wellness center, right?
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There was a bunch of steps in between. But I started
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where I was, and I used what I had. I found joy in
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posting positive quotes for people. And sometimes people would write under, like,
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oh my gosh, this is so good, blah, blah, blah. Sometimes nobody wrote under it.
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It wasn't about getting that validation from somebody writing under
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it. It was about me feeling like I'm fulfilling a part
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of my purpose and what I know is going to help people. Connecting
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with others is important. Again, try to find community. If
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you can't find community, there's always online
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communities, like my shifting community. Practicing
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mindfulness is another way to cultivate joy. Prioritizing your
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self-care, it includes moving your body. I just
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got an alert. My Apple Watch
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was like, oh, wow, you got a 10-day streak of working out.
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I've never done that in my life but I've been struggling
20:15
with a lot of rage around everything that's going on and so I
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decided to enhance and increase the activities that I
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do that bring me joy and I know I feel good after
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I'm done. So I'm using that rage
20:30
and working out, and I'm feeling good after. So
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really prioritizing your self-care is important. Creating
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a joyful environment. This includes getting off of social media, getting off
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of the news. not talking about those things over and
20:44
over again, right? So when I think about cultivating an
20:48
environment that is joyful, it also
20:51
includes taking some things out of your environment. It also includes
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maybe reading a book on wellness or
20:58
care or listening to something, right? It may seem
21:02
foreign or new or different, But in order for
21:05
you to get to where you need to be, your system is going to be a
21:08
little bit uncomfortable. If you're somebody that's always on social media, and
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you're not typically a reader, you're not typically listening to certain things, start
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making your system uncomfortable until it gets comfortable. Because
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that's what it's going to take to create that safe environment for yourself.
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Setting intentional goals, right? If you're somebody that might
21:28
tell yourself like, oh, Celeste, I don't know how to be consistent. I don't know how
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to create goals. Start with something small. If you don't make up your bed,
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start with just making up your bed every morning. Make a commitment to make
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up your bed every morning, right? If you make up your bed, if there's something,
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let's say, moving your body, you don't move your body, make a commitment to go
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for a walk, right? Like, you know what? I'm going to go for
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a walk two days a week, right? It's not about going to the
21:50
gym or getting clothes. If you're somebody that says you want to start reading,
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you know what? Set your alarm for a certain time and
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then set your timer for 20 minutes and read for 20 minutes. I
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promise you, the more you start being intentional on the little things,
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You'll find yourself being able to gain confidence that
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you can do the bigger things. One of the goals I had during the pandemic is
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I wanted to drink more water, right? That may seem insignificant to
22:16
someone, but I wanted to work on getting more hydrated because it
22:20
wasn't something that I did all the time. And so what I did, I got
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a sticky note. I put it on my computer, the computer that I use every single day.
22:27
to meet with people. Every time I opened it up, I would see that yellow sticky note
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and it would say, don't forget to drink water. And before I started working,
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I would grab me a bottle of water. And as you
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can see, if you're watching me on my video, look at this, I got my water right here. I
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don't go anywhere without my water because I've built the practice. I don't
22:44
need the sticky note anymore. So start with
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something small. If you want to work on being intentional about your
22:51
goals, you may have aspirations to do something like
22:54
bigger, but it's going to take you starting smaller, right?
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Start with the little things and then start to build your way up.
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Practicing kindness, right? Doing something nice for someone. Donating
23:08
your time. That's something that really actually brings joy. Embracing
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playfulness is something that could bring in joy. And then
23:15
reflecting on joyful moments, right? I ask
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my kids four questions every night. One is, how are you feeling? What
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went well today? Um, what did you do to prepare
23:26
for your tomorrow? And then what are you grateful for? Like, what,
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what are you grateful for? And what went well today allows them to embrace the
23:33
moments. My goal in doing that with them is for them to
23:36
learn. I want this to be like more natural than not for
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them to get more into the moment. It's not something in America we talk about.
23:43
We only talk about, Oh, you don't have this, get this. You're, you're,
23:46
you're sweeping with the broom, get a Swiffer. Your broom's not good enough. Oh,
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you have an iPhone 10. No, you need an iPhone 16. It's
23:55
never satisfied. And so we learn not
23:59
to be satisfied with what we have. I've been to a lot of places
24:02
that are not as rich as America is.
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That's a lot poorer. And the amount of joy that
24:09
comes on people's faces is mind-blowing. I
24:12
remember the first time I went somewhere, and I was just like, wow, it's
24:15
not even like they have. But look at the joy that's in their spirit. You can feel
24:19
it. It's contagious, the joy that happens. Right.
24:23
So I do, I want you to think about like what you have, I
24:26
want you to think about starting where you are and you
24:29
know, last podcast I made it, I said finances, pay attention to
24:33
your finances, pay attention to what you're spending money on.
24:37
Right. A lot of times we're spending money on things we don't need. I
24:40
always say, get a notebook. Yeah, I sell a guided journal, but if you
24:44
don't have no money to get no journal, get you a notebook, get you a paper and
24:47
pen, go to the dollar store and use that to start writing things
24:51
down. Don't allow the way
24:54
society is to make you think that you got to buy something
24:58
and break your bank to be okay. Yeah,
25:01
those things would be nice. It'd be nice to have a coach. It would be nice to spend
25:05
all this money on therapy, right? Because everybody doesn't have insurance. Everybody
25:08
can't find a therapy. If I had the money to buy the therapist I
25:11
wanted or have the coach or have this or that, that would be
25:15
great. But guess what? I don't have it. And I
25:18
want you to refuse to allow what you don't have to stop you from being great
25:21
and getting to where you need to be. That's the attitude I want you to have,
25:25
right? Um, so, you know, this was
25:29
important for me to talk about as something that's been
25:32
on my spirit for a while. Um, you know,
25:35
this, the things that I'm doing to be okay. Um,
25:39
I try to come to you in real time with things that, um,
25:43
are important in the world. Um, and I, I want you
25:46
to, I want to encourage you to work on finding joy,
25:50
creating joy in the midst of all the things that are happening. Also,
25:54
my wellness center is in Stoughton. I have events that are happening. So
25:58
I created this monthly connections thing.
26:02
And I had the first one for February. We crafted. It
26:05
was so cool. We did bracelets. Some people did
26:08
wine glasses. It was so cool. Next month,
26:11
we're doing connections. So I called the series Connections because
26:16
making connections as adults can be really hard. Um, so
26:19
the next one we're doing next month is movie and
26:22
chill. So we are going to watch the classic coming to
26:26
America, have a little trivia before come
26:29
by yourself or bring a friend. Um, it's going to be such a
26:32
good time. Um, you know, there's something powerful about
26:36
community and I think that's where we're heading is community. Like we
26:39
need community. We cannot do this alone. Um, so
26:43
that's one of the social things that I'm having. Um, the next event
26:46
that I'm having, so I have these next events monthly. Um,
26:50
so we have rest and recharge that's happening in March. Um,
26:53
we just added Friday night restore. So
26:57
the last Friday of every month, we're going to do restorative yoga here.
27:01
And restorative yoga is a gentle meditative practice that soothes
27:04
the nervous system. and invites deep relaxation. Using
27:08
supportive props like blankets and bolsters, you'll settle into postures for
27:12
extended period, allowing your body to release tension
27:15
effortlessly. This practice helps regulate stress, improve sleep,
27:19
and cultivate profound sense of calm. Uh, this is a
27:22
great class for, uh, beginners. If you are somebody
27:26
that feels like you have things trapped in your body, these
27:30
somatic classes that I'm providing are a great way to start
27:33
your process. Um, I've taken them here and it's
27:37
been so good. Um, especially I took the rest and recharge class.
27:41
We did breath work, chair, yoga, meditation, all within an hour.
27:44
And I, I started feeling really wound up.
27:48
And I remember after it was over, I was just like, oh my gosh, my body feels
27:52
so good. And then the next class we're having here,
27:56
that's the third Tuesday of every month, Mindful Yen. So
27:59
Mindful Yen offers yoga postures that are held in
28:03
stillness for short periods of time, focusing on the connective tissue.
28:07
Various breath techniques and concepts of mindfulness are
28:10
woven into class narrative as poses are held. And
28:14
we have the bolsters, we have the blankets, we have the water. You
28:18
literally just have to come. So if you want to learn more
28:21
about these events, all you got to do is go to stwyt.com slash
28:25
events, and you'll find out more. If you want to follow me or
28:28
my socials, you can follow all my socials by searching Celeste
28:32
the Therapist. If you want to follow my wellness into socials, all
28:35
you got to do is search stwyt.com. And
28:39
that is the acronym for shifting the way you think. So
28:43
one of the things that I want to make it clear, you have the
28:46
power to create change. You just have to have faith to believe in yourself. And
28:50
when you believe in yourself, no one can take that away from you. So
28:53
my challenge to you is to work on creating joy.
28:56
I want you to ask yourself, self, what am I doing
29:00
to create joy in my life? It could be like, you know what? When
29:03
I get home from work, I'm just going to have me a cup of hot tea. I'm going
29:06
to wake up in the morning, listen to some music, right? Don't
29:10
make it complicated. Do not make it complicated. But
29:13
I want you to work on creating joy. Until next time, beautiful