Latest / Bleacher Report / Shaq Literally Dunks on Funny Marco in Wild Presser _ Marco Is Off the Ball, Ep. 6
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: It's one of your terrible skits.
- 0:02Speaker 2: N this communication. M good morning.
- 0:12Speaker 1: Can you hear me? Yeah?
- 0:13Speaker 2: I can. I'm right here, all right.
- 0:15Speaker 3: I want to first off saying by you never answered
- 0:18Speaker 3: none of my text or calls when I call you?
- 0:20Speaker 1: Why so I gave you the wrong number?
- 0:23Speaker 3: Next question, Okay, so it's a big thing that's going on.
- 0:28Speaker 3: It's one hundred man versus one gorilla. What's your input
- 0:31Speaker 3: on that? Who will win the gorilla?
- 0:34Speaker 1: Why? Because I've already beat up one hundred men.
- 0:36Speaker 2: One hundred shacks versus No, I'm the gorilla.
- 0:40Speaker 1: You are? Yeah, I can call myself gorilla. You can't.
- 0:43Speaker 2: What do you feel like? I remember that you got
- 0:47Speaker 2: any old clothes that you don't want no more? You've
- 0:49Speaker 2: been famous for a long time. You got any clothes
- 0:52Speaker 2: that you can give me or I can fit?
- 0:53Speaker 1: I know who got some clothes for you?
- 0:55Speaker 2: Who?
- 0:55Speaker 1: Kenny Smith? Y'all got the same shape in the.
- 0:58Speaker 3: Back guy when you got up and walked away and
- 1:01Speaker 3: used the bathom.
- 1:03Speaker 1: Go ahead, keep talking Jack on TV? What go ahead? Yeah,
- 1:07Speaker 1: that's not olive all you've been drinking. You take some
- 1:10Speaker 1: matches with you. I don't ship I hold it inside.
- 1:20Speaker 2: Am I attractive.
- 1:21Speaker 1: That's Barkley.
- 1:22Speaker 2: You got a lot of items. What things do? Is
- 1:24Speaker 2: there anything you ever turned down? You got a lot
- 1:26Speaker 2: of side hustles?
- 1:28Speaker 1: Yeah? What cologne? Why they wanted to use my urine?
- 1:36Speaker 1: Because urine has a lot of nutrients.
- 1:40Speaker 2: Use Name two things that you like about yourself?
- 1:44Speaker 1: Sex? See?
- 1:48Speaker 2: Do you like free things?
- 1:49Speaker 1: No? I don't like old people.
- 1:51Speaker 3: I'm I mean a lot of the best things in
- 1:53Speaker 3: life come for free. Air, relationship with God. So how
- 1:56Speaker 3: do you feel about free things? So you're with them
- 1:58Speaker 3: or against them? I don't breathe right so free?
- 2:03Speaker 1: No? I pay for my hair.
- 2:04Speaker 2: So you never got anything free.
- 2:06Speaker 1: I got a lot of things free. Like what? I
- 2:08Speaker 1: can't tell you?
- 2:09Speaker 2: But do you feel like you know how to handle
- 2:11Speaker 2: free things?
- 2:12Speaker 1: Yeah? I do.
- 2:13Speaker 2: Why you can't make a free throw?
- 2:14Speaker 1: Then I made them when I need to make them?
- 2:18Speaker 1: Can you count? What's this?
- 2:21Speaker 2: That's a finger?
- 2:22Speaker 1: What's that?
- 2:22Speaker 2: It's two fingers? What's this three fingers? What's this four fingers?
- 2:26Speaker 1: So many rings? I got made it? I made it
- 2:29Speaker 1: enough of him? I made more than your favorite big man?
- 2:31Speaker 2: What's this?
- 2:32Speaker 1: One piece? Three? That's the check from Twitter? That?
- 2:43Speaker 2: Oh?
- 2:43Speaker 1: Come here? I know what that means huh. That means
- 2:46Speaker 1: come here. Don't mean that, it does?
- 2:49Speaker 2: It means this mean come here?
- 2:51Speaker 1: Yeah, it means come here. I want to talk to you.
- 2:53Speaker 2: Do you feel like I can spend a day with you?
- 2:55Speaker 2: I want to spend twenty fires with you.
- 2:56Speaker 1: I would, but I don't like man wiggs man? What man?
- 3:01Speaker 2: So what you're encounter to?
- 3:02Speaker 1: You have a man wi'? It's not your breaks? What's that?
- 3:07Speaker 2: You own a Papa John's right?
- 3:09Speaker 1: A couple of them?
- 3:09Speaker 2: Right?
- 3:10Speaker 1: Okay?
- 3:10Speaker 3: So I got someone that has h a complaint. Pudgy,
- 3:14Speaker 3: you don't mind coming in here. I got a customer
- 3:17Speaker 3: that had an incident with one of your pizzas.
- 3:21Speaker 2: This is my fitness trainer.
- 3:23Speaker 1: Su Shot. How are you, sir? Not doing too well?
- 3:26Speaker 1: What's going on? I specifically asks.
- 3:28Speaker 2: For a single pole with extra pepperoni.
- 3:31Speaker 1: Ye.
- 3:31Speaker 3: They looked at me and said ship and gave me
- 3:34Speaker 3: a leggie pop with extra out.
- 3:37Speaker 1: I'll tell you what for that mistake. I apologize. You
- 3:39Speaker 1: get free piece of the rest of your life. I
- 3:41Speaker 1: can do that. Love you shocked you too?
- 3:45Speaker 2: That's it. I don't You're not gonna that's it. You're
- 3:51Speaker 2: not gonna give me heat for it.
- 3:52Speaker 1: Huh oh, don't you have me? You never bring me Margo.
- 4:00Speaker 1: That's why I don't call.
- 4:01Speaker 2: You back, because the time to be your friend.
- 4:04Speaker 1: I thought we were friends.
- 4:05Speaker 3: What about tempons, I don't know what those are. Basically,
- 4:08Speaker 3: you have your own company. You have a tempont pregnancy test.
- 4:13Speaker 3: I mean, oh yeah, your own pregnancy test.
- 4:16Speaker 1: No way why I used to love Mory pervid so
- 4:19Speaker 1: I wanted to be part of knowing if somebody was
- 4:21Speaker 1: the father or not. But that's why I got in
- 4:23Speaker 1: that business. Very look at a business too. Shout out
- 4:26Speaker 1: to Mory Puvids.
- 4:28Speaker 2: I remember one thing that I want to do before
- 4:30Speaker 2: we leave.
- 4:32Speaker 3: I want to know if I could do like I
- 4:36Speaker 3: can just get a shot on you.
- 4:37Speaker 2: You could guard me one on one.
- 4:39Speaker 3: I just get it back like back you down and
- 4:41Speaker 3: get to the realm all my heart me just one
- 4:44Speaker 3: bucket that I comment.
- 4:46Speaker 1: No, that never happened. Huh No, you're too little? Was
- 4:49Speaker 1: just a try why to waste my time?
- 4:51Speaker 2: No, I mean, what do you mean it's not waste time?
- 4:53Speaker 1: Waste time?
- 4:54Speaker 2: Can you bring the basketball? Go out police right there
- 5:00Speaker 2: your mind?
- 5:01Speaker 1: Can I test it out first? You gotta make sure
- 5:04Speaker 1: something that stand here. If it's shackproof. I will play
- 5:09Speaker 1: you one on one. You U should you just have
- 5:11Speaker 1: to go like this. It said it's shock, it's not shackproof.
- 5:19Speaker 2: What does that mean?
- 5:20Speaker 1: It's broke.
- 5:21Speaker 2: It's not broke.
- 5:22Speaker 1: Yes, it's not shock. What if you just showed you
- 5:29Speaker 1: me no the things. No, it's not even effective anymore.
- 5:33Speaker 2: Now you're just ruled my ship.
- 5:34Speaker 1: Well you should have brought a shackproof gold out here.
- 5:36Speaker 2: What is a shackproof goal?
- 5:38Speaker 1: You got a phone?
- 5:39Speaker 2: Yeah, G O O G.
- 5:42Speaker 1: Google. I don't know how to spell it, but you
- 5:44Speaker 1: just just type in shockproof rooms.
- 5:47Speaker 2: You are not great.
- 5:50Speaker 1: That's because I'm not from this planet. Playing called b
- 5:54Speaker 1: A n A.
- 5:55Speaker 2: You know what b t A me?
- 5:56Speaker 1: You know what b A n A No busting gas?
- 5:59Speaker 2: You know with B A two me?
- 6:01Speaker 1: Bust uh titty?
- 6:02Speaker 2: No belt to the ass?
- 6:04Speaker 1: Belt?
- 6:04Speaker 2: What belt to ass?
- 6:06Speaker 1: Never got beatle belts? All right, Look, you still want
- 6:09Speaker 1: to shoot?
- 6:09Speaker 2: That's all I want to do. This is my dream.
- 6:12Speaker 2: Come close. You just let me just try to just dunk.
- 6:14Speaker 2: That's all I want.
- 6:15Speaker 1: Dunk on me.
- 6:15Speaker 2: Yes, that's all. You don't get hurt, Micah, I won't
- 6:18Speaker 2: get hurt.
- 6:18Speaker 1: You're gonna get hurt.
- 6:19Speaker 2: I just want to do it.
- 6:20Speaker 1: I'm gonna save you.
- 6:20Speaker 2: No, no, I'm just saying.
- 6:22Speaker 1: Gonna get hurt.
- 6:23Speaker 2: No, can I get it? Shut back down? Please, that's
- 6:25Speaker 2: all I'm why.
- 6:27Speaker 1: You're too little.
- 6:28Speaker 2: You can't so iverson then dunked on. You didn't scored
- 6:32Speaker 2: on you.
- 6:32Speaker 1: No nobody to score it on me?
- 6:35Speaker 2: Scored him?
- 6:35Speaker 1: No, he has not play a clip.
- 6:44Speaker 2: Thank you? They played it.
- 6:45Speaker 1: No, that's a I. That's all intelligence.
- 6:48Speaker 2: So I picked the go up.
- 6:51Speaker 1: You pick it up and shoot. You make a shot
- 6:53Speaker 1: from from over there. I'll play you all them. You
- 6:55Speaker 1: get one shot, better pick it up by yourself.
- 6:57Speaker 2: No help, no help, I got this ship.
- 7:04Speaker 1: No help. Bla la la la la lah. Hey man,
- 7:10Speaker 1: I don't have all day. You know what? D beat me? No?
- 7:14Speaker 2: The bad got it, you know with d B B
- 7:18Speaker 2: d B D. I don't know d B be me?
- 7:22Speaker 1: Yeah?
- 7:23Speaker 2: No, the bad is you? Yeah, okay, all right? What
- 7:27Speaker 2: a basketball though?
- 7:29Speaker 1: Can't make a shot, can't play me? Five four?
- 7:34Speaker 2: I mean you lost the lose.
- 7:39Speaker 1: I didn't lose the ball. Don't come up here. I'm
- 7:41Speaker 1: telling you nothing. Don't come up here, or I'm gonna
- 7:45Speaker 1: spray you or pepper spray, Lem's spray you stay down there,
- 7:51Speaker 1: go ahead. Mm hmm, hurry up.
- 8:01Speaker 2: I gotta get out of the suit.
- 8:02Speaker 1: First of aust not suit. Oh my god, put your
- 8:05Speaker 1: shirt on. I don't want to see MB's young boys.
- 8:08Speaker 1: Man boobs. Put your titties away.
- 8:12Speaker 2: Do this in slow motion.
- 8:13Speaker 4: Oh no, that's how you make your free throw best
- 8:25Speaker 4: of three.
- 8:26Speaker 1: You're gonna miss again. You're gonna miss again later, bye bye.
- 8:36Speaker 2: Go back down, No serious, no back down, no serious.
- 8:39Speaker 1: No man, get the ball. Let me.
- 8:42Speaker 2: M hmm.
- 8:44Speaker 1: Let me teach you how your back down. First, you
- 8:46Speaker 1: gotta stand right here. And then when you get the
- 8:48Speaker 1: ball right here, you got them. Love your funny, Marco.
- 9:00Speaker 2: I'm good. I love good.