Latest / NO FILTER / Joe Rogan Experience _2484 - David Cross

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Joe Rogan Experience _2484 - David Cross · NO FILTER

• 0:04
  Speaker 1: The Joe Rogan Experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: by night. All day. David.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: Joseph.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Good to see you.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: Good to see you.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Dude, I haven't seen you in a long fucking time.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: When was the last time we were actually in a
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: room together?
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: Well, I was trying to think of that. I don't know.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: I would imagine post-news radio we hung out at some
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: point at some show somewhere.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: Somewhere.
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: But I don't know. But I do remember- Uh, cause
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: I did news radio a couple of times and we,
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: we hung out. I remember, I think we both know
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: just you had more hair than, uh, I was probably
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: already at this point.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: I was fighting to keep it. I was hanging on.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: Are you, do you shave or is that it? Is that.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: Oh, it's, I mean, I'm bald. If I didn't shave,
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: I'd be bald all the way up here, but I
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: got a hair transplant and it was useless.
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: I did a joke about it. I go, having a
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: hair transplant is like taking people that are healthy and
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: moving them into a neighborhood where everyone's dying. This is
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: just like, where did Bob go? He just fucking flew
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: off the face of the earth.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, so you just accepted it and said, fuck it.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: I should have done it a long time ago. It's
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: so much better. And I don't have to talk to
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: a barber. I don't have to listen to boring fucking
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: stories while they hold you hostage with a pair of scissors.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: That's what this is. This gets me I don't like shaving.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: I don't, it's kind of a pain in the ass.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: And I also, I look like a, uh, kind of
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: a turtle. I look like a turtle, you know, when
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: I shave, I don't like it. Um, and it's not
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: attractive to me and I jerk off to me all
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: the time. So I want to keep things fresh. Uh, but, uh,
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: I probably don't have to. I could probably get clippers
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: and stuff, but I go to one of my guys
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: around the corner where I live, and I have this
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: experience where I want to get in and out, right?
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: Because of what you were saying. A lot of chit-chat.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: And there are a couple guys, very quiet. Hi, how
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: you doing?
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: Good.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Fist bump, whatever. You know what I want. Get out
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: of there. There's one guy who... It just talks all,
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: and then they have that, the blade, you know, the,
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: what do you call that? You know, the blade blade.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: Straight razor.
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: Thank you. And they got it right there, so you
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: got to be polite. It's on your, it's by your,
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: you know, and I know I could avoid it if
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: I just get some clippers and just do this thing,
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: but I don't. I don't know. That was boring. Sorry.
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: There's no point to it. It barely has anything to
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: do with what we were talking about.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: There's something about a beard, though, that makes you distinguished
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: or at least have experience.
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: Or look like a homeless, you know, alcoholic. I mean,
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: there are plenty of those guys, too.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a lot of those, too. But a beard
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: is like there's a statement with a beard. Like a
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: full beard. Like yours, white.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Mine is just, you know, I don't like shaving. Like,
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: you know, and again, I do like, I only gain
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: weight in two places. Stomach and right here. And also
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: I have a kind of a thin frame. So it's
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: really not attractive. It's not attractive.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: So the beard is sort of.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: It's more laziness. I don't have to worry about it.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah. No, I hear you.
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: And this, you know, I just, I go, I don't know, six,
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: seven weeks and then I just shave it. Once it
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: gets out, because this, my hair doesn't grow down or
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: it just grows out like a clown. You know, it
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: goes this way.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: All of it.
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: Even this too. And once this starts filling in, it
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: just looks goofy. Goofy.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I have a friend, my friend Hasan. He used
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: to shave his head, and now, purposely to look goofy,
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: he lets the sides go out. And it's madness. It's just...
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: It's all fucking crazy thick hair.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: And bald on top?
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: And bald on top, yeah. And he does a joke
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: on stage about it. He's Indian. This is my impression
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: of an Indian pussy.
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: And is he just, like, not concerned about getting laid?
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think he's just embracing... But he still gets laid,
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: you know, because he's really funny. I think he just
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: embraces not giving a fuck. There he is.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: Oh, he looks familiar to me.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: Okay. Very funny guy.
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: All right, cool.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: He's one of the up-and-comers. Well, he's from L.A. originally.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: He was one of the doormen at the comedy store.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: Okay, he looks very professorial.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: He's very smart.
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but doesn't give a fuck about his hair. Who's that?
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: Art Bell.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: I was going to guess Art Bell. I swear to God.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: I swear to God. I don't even know if I've
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: ever seen him.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's him. Coast to coast.
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: Yes, yes.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: Holy shit. From the Kingdom of Nigh. Wow. I fucking
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: love that show. That was the show that I listened
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: to coming home from Hollywood because I lived out in
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: the valley and I would drive home at night and
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: I'd listen to Late Night with Art Bell. Oh, it
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: was the best.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: Coast to coast with Art Bell. I used to do
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: a whole bit about... Because who's the new guy?
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: George... Norrie. George Norrie, right.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: And I'm going to digress for one second. Did you ever...
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: Do you play video games at all?
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Yes. Well, I try not to. But I used to
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: play a lot of them.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: Did you ever play Prey?
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: No, but I know what it is.
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: A great underrated game got ripped off. Or just people
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: bit certain things that they started. But one of the
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: coolest things... So it's about like this. It takes place
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: on a reservation, you know, in the 90s, I guess,
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: or something like that. And there's a bartender and her boyfriend.
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: And it takes place in this bar. And then aliens come.
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: And then this guy goes on the alien ship to
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: go rescue her. But they did this really cool thing.
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: So first they have this. In the video game, right
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: at the bar, there's a TV. And as you walk
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: towards it, it's like staticky until you get closer to it.
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: And then as your character gets closer to it, it's
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: Art Bell talking about aliens and stuff. And I know
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: I'm not doing it justice, but it was such a cool,
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: smart idea. And God bless him.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: He was the OG.
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And just some of the guy... One thing that,
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: because I listen to it a lot, too, because sometimes,
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: you know, you're listening and you're like, this is insane.
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: This is crazy. And he would always, always treat the
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: guest with deference, you know, respect. And I, that must
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: have been, because there were things that were, you know,
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: if you go back to all the episodes that were
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: kind of contradictory in a sense, you know, like. Wait,
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: you think all these things happen? You think there's a
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: place in the middle of the ocean that has, like,
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: it's a community of people that live there? And then,
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: but you also think this, like, all these different things,
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: it'd be like, hmm, huh, interesting.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he would let you go.
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: He'd let you go, yeah.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: He'd give it some air.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: But he was, yeah, he was never rude or dismissive.
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: No, never.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: You'd call him up. He had a time traveler line.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: Where you would call specifically if you were a time traveler.
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: But if you were calling from the past and they
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: didn't have that technology yet.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: How would that work? No, it's mostly people from the future,
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: I believe.
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: Like, Art, I'm calling from seven minutes in the future.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: Listen. I think his whole deal was if you are
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: here in this current era, but you are from another time,
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: you could call. Because, you know, the idea was, like,
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: he would have these... Remote viewers and oddballs on. And
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: they would talk about that we have had the ability
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: to time travel for a long time.
• 8:43
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: You know, there are wormholes that exist. And they explain
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: the quantum dynamics involved. And time travel has been breached
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: by the CIA in the 1960s.
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: And you have these people call up. But Art would always, like,
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: give them air. Like, let them breathe. Let it breathe.
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 8:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Art, I'm a werewolf. Interesting. Tell me more. It didn't matter,
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: no matter what it was. It was a fun show.
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, I loved it.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: Craziest people, from fucking Bigfoot people to alien people. Everything.
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: And then a lot of people, ex-military, right? You know,
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: you get that, like.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: Whistleblowers.
• 9:19
  Speaker 5: I was stationed in, you know, outside of a remote
• 9:24
  Speaker 5: island that I can't go into off of Singapore, and...
• 9:29
  Speaker 5: I witnessed some things that I still have difficulty believing.
• 9:34
  Speaker 5: And then he just, yeah, what happened?
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: It was great.
• 9:37
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: It's so fun.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: And you, so did you also listen to Phil Hendry?
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: Yes. Oh, God. He was the best.
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: Super genius.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: The best thing about Phil Hendry was the people that
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: didn't understand what was going on would call in and
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: be really upset.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: The first two times I heard him, I didn't understand
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: what he was doing. He's that good, too. And I
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: would be like, this is crazy, this guy. And then
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: eventually you're like, oh, he's doing characters because he'd repeat
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: characters and stuff. But I got the chance to watch
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: him do a show. So he's got three mics, I
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: want to say. uh, like two mics like this and
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: then a phone mic or, you know, a phone, like
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: a hand, uh, uh, old time, you know, cradle phone.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: And he was doing himself, uh, the, the woman who's, uh,
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: runs the, uh, HOA or whatever that, uh, whatever her
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: name was that, that character. And then somebody else calling in,
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: like he did somebody calling on the phone and it was, uh,
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: I mean, it was like a magic act.
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: It was crazy to watch how, without missing a beat,
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: and I could see, you could see how he strategically
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: takes breaths so that he can go from one character
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: to another and interrupting each other.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: You know, it was fascinating, but he's a genius.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: It's the only thing that caught, right away, I was like, oh,
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: wait a minute, there's no cross talk. Like, right, one
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: of the early times I listened, I was like, I
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: think this is the same guy.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: Well, he bumps it up. Like, he's really good at
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: making it sound as if, like... Because he'll interrupt himself
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: and go, and I... Okay, but, you know, and stop
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: and then just go right into the other voice. It's
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: fucking phenomenal.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: And completely original. Like, I don't know of anybody else
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: that did anything like that.
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: No.
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: Did you ever... he used to put out stuff for charity, like, uh,
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: CDs and things. And he has, uh, I don't know
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: what it would be called, but it was one of the,
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: one of the things he put out for charity. That was, um,
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: a guy called into the station. I think he was
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: probably super high, but he called in thinking it was
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: pizza hut. And he fucks with this guy in the
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: best way where he's like, uh, And who's the, what's
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: the woman character he does? It's kind of like, like
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: a black woman who's like, honey, it is the, I
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: don't know, Marjorie, I think maybe. But he, then he
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: does that woman answering the phone at, you know, Pizza Hut.
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: And then he does the automated thing like, She's like,
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: I'm going to put you on. It's easier to do
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: the automated thing. And the guy's like, okay, all right.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: And then he gets out. He's like, thank you for
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: calling Pizza Hut. The best pizza in a three block radius.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: And if you want, I'm not doing it justice. You
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: got to go do it. Hear it.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: Listen. Can you?
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: You got it?
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: Headphones. Okay.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: It's so brilliant. Wait.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: Whichever is large.
• 13:12
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: 16-inch deep pan dish pan. You got the dish pan
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: deep or extra deep? Just a regular large thick crust.
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: 16-inch thick crust on a deep dish? You want puff dish? No.
• 13:23
  Speaker 4: You want any of them puffy cheese balls, anything like that?
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: We got a special on buffalo wing. We got a
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: special on, damn, I forgot the other thing. We got
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: a special on something. All right, what do you want?
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: What kind of cheese you want? Blue, Swiss, cheddar, Munster.
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: Okay, I think I'm going to have the wrong location here.
• 13:45
  Speaker 4: All right, hold on.
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: And he's subdued.
• 13:49
  Speaker 3: Thanks for calling Pizza. Your call is being transferred. Please
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: have all credit card information available for our operators.
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: Yes, Pizza, hello.
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: Hi, yes.
• 13:59
  Speaker 7: Hi.
• 14:00
  Speaker 4: Hi, which location are you at? We're at the corner
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: of La Cienega and Venice. Okay. I'd like to place
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: an order for delivery. All right. Can I put you
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: on hold? We'll put you through our automated system. Hold on, please.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: Thank you for calling pizza. If you'd like cheese pizza,
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: press 1. If you'd like a meatball pizza, press 2.
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: If you'd like sausage, press 3. Press 2.
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: Oh, it goes on and on and on. He eventually
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: gets the guy a fish pizza. And the guy's like, no, man,
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: I don't want fish. It's really funny. But that's him.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: That's Phil doing all those voices. And that's not set up.
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: A guy had called into the studio thinking it was pizza.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: And they're like, take this call.
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: Did you ever meet him?
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: I did briefly when I got to see him do his.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: He did a live show at Aspen Comedy Festival. Oh. Long, long,
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: long time ago.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: I did something with him, Bob Odenkirk, and Doug Stanhope. Oh, wow.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: And Adam Carolla. I don't remember where it was. I
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: want to say it was somewhere in Canada, but it
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: was some sit-down. We were talking about the process of
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: going through, because he was in the middle of doing
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: some sort of a television show pilot. Yeah, yeah. So
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: we were talking about the process of creating a pilot.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: And what it's like trying to get a pilot to
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: an actual Finnish television show and get it approved and
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: what the struggles are. It was very interesting. I don't
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: think it was for, it was like one of those
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: Montreal Comedy Festival things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That makes sense.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: Where they had some, it was like some weird, it
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: was a long time ago. It was like, God, it
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: had to be like 2001 or something like that.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I vaguely remember when he was, there was going
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: to be, because he would talk about it, doing this sitcom.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, did it ever happen?
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: I don't think so, no.
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: He was a really nice guy, though. Not what I
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: expected at all. I expected him to be fucking insane.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: Just like just to be able to do that every
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: night and not get bored with just completely fucking with
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: people every day.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: It's it's got to be exhausting to like mentally because
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: you're you've got to remember. It's like like really great
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: improv guys where you have to remember all these details.
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: Bring them back 30 minutes later. Right? And you're doing
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: multiple characters. You ever see T.J. and Dave?
• 16:29
  Speaker 4: No.
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: Oh, dude.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: The best. Yeah? What is it?
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: It's T.J. Jadigowski and Dave Pasquese, who are like the
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: kings of that stuff out of Chicago. And they come,
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: they tour around. And they're just, they're two guys who.
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: It starts off, you know, none of it's planned. And
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: they have like a dedicated cult following. When they're in
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: New York, it sells out like that. And you got
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: to go to at least two shows to see how
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: wildly different it is. I mean, there are two guys
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: that come out on stage. Usually it was like three chairs.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: And it'll just start with like, you know, how's it going?
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: Good, good, good.
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: Are you in line?
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: No, no, no.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: And you watch it like, oh, they're in line. Where
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: are they in line at? Do they know each other?
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: And then it turns out they're at the DMV, but
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: they're not. It's like a room outside of the DMV.
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: And then they will leave and come back and be
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: somebody else, right? A kid that was mentioned or a
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: wife or something or be in a car. And it
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: all wraps up. It's all a big story. And I
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: have seen, I've probably seen him 30, 40 times. And
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: I've seen shows that were more, that were funnier and
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: more poignant than some plays that have been worked on
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: for years. You know?
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: And is it completely improvised?
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: Completely, 100%.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: Oh, they're, I mean, do you know Tim Meadows?
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: So Tim was a guest. Sometimes I'll have a third person.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: I know who he is. I don't know him.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: So I was, and Tim's been you know, uh, SNL.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: And ensconced in that second city, uh, world for decades.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: And he said it was the most terrifying thing he's
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: ever done because you're, they're like genius level. I mean, the,
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: the detail you have to remember. And then, and then
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: on top of it, if one of them is, you know,
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: I'm a Marine biologist or whatever, it slips out. Then
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: that person has to know about The real person playing
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: the fake marine biologist has to know enough about marine
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: biology to keep the thing going, you know, and it's
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: just next level.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: It's almost time for spring break. So maybe you're headed
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: to the beach or maybe you're taking the kids on
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: a road trip or maybe you're just taking some extra
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: time for yourself. No matter what, you deserve a break
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: and a reset and AG1 can help. AG1 is your
• 19:10
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• 19:14
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• 19:20
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• 19:23
  Speaker 1: you can start working it into your routine even when
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: you don't have a routine. Just slip a few travel
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: packs into your luggage and have a nice flight. I've
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: talked about AG1 for a long time, and it's not
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: just me. I know a lot of people enjoy it.
• 19:36
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• 19:41
  Speaker 1: take care of your health. Visit drinkag1. com slash Joe Rogan.
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: And for a limited time, get a bottle of Omega-3
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• 19:54
  Speaker 1: your welcome kit with your first subscription. That's a $ 111
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: value at drinkag1. com slash Joe Rogan. Well, I'd imagine that's like...
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: a muscle that you just get really strong with. Like ranters.
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: Like Tim Dillon is the best at ranting on a
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: podcast alone. He doesn't have anybody with him. Most of
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: his podcasts are just him ranting. And I've watched the
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: development of it. I'm like, that's an amazing muscle to
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: develop because you just get accustomed to that kind of scenario,
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: that situation, where it's just, and your mind just gets
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: used to producing content just.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: And like old school AM late night radio guys right
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: who don't have people calling in who are like talking
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: about whatever and they gotta do it you know four
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: or five times a week yeah three hours by themselves.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah I used to always like to listen to them
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: I used to like to listen to those crazy right
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: wing angry political talk shows cause I don't I didn't
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: know anybody like that so I was like what what
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: is this guy doing.
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: I well uh That's, that was the bulk of the radio.
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's why, you know, you have like Art
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: Bell and Phil Hendry, like a nice, like, Oh, okay.
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: Cause I got all this, I got Mark Levin and
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: I got, uh, you know, uh, what's his name?
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: You know, Rush Limbaugh.
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: Rush Limbaugh. Yeah. And, uh, and when you, when you
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: first start listening or when I first started listening, uh,
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: and I came out to LA from Boston, you know,
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: and people were like, there's this guy out here is
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: fucking nuts, you know? And, uh, uh, I'd never heard
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: of him in Boston. And then, and you're like, does he,
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: how much of this stuff does he believe? Does he
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: really believe? And how much has he come to believe?
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: Does that make sense?
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: And, uh, And those guys, that was a whole fascinating thing.
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: And Wally George. Do you remember Wally George?
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: I do, but I don't remember much about him. I
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: remember the name. What did Wally George do?
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: He was the guy who originated what, I mean, now
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: it's really familiar. Remember Morton Downey Jr.? He was a
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: little after Wally George.
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's right. That's right.
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: And he would, look, at 83, and he was, and
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: it was a super low budget, like a, cable access
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: type thing back when that was a whole thing and
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: he'd get the audience would be hooting and hollering and
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: he'd have people on like somebody who and sometimes they
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: i i think because it became popular sort of like
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: with morton downey jr where people came on to quote
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: unquote fuck with wally george like i'm gonna pretend to
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: be a you know uh a furry way and I'm
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: going to, you know, have gauges and, and you know
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: what I mean? Like just the archetype of the thing
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: they want to yell at. And, uh, and I think
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: people started, it was, there were some bullshit people on there,
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: you know, people lying about who they were, but he'd
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: have people on and then, and then kick them off.
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: It would happen all the time. Like, come on, sit down.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: What the fuck do you think you're doing? And everybody
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: would yell at the person. They'd start talking. Get the
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: fuck out of here. And that was the show. And
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: here's something really crazy. And tell me if this is rumor.
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: Look up at your magic computer. Rebecca De Mornay's dad.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: The actress. That's... Yeah. Wally George?
• 23:32
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: No. Really?
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: Look it up. Casey, right?
• 23:38
  Speaker 8: Jamie.
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: Jamie?
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: I'm going to call you Casey.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: I forget who Rebecca De Mornay was.
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: From Risky Business.
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: Oh, wow. Wow, her dad? Yeah. Is Wally George.
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: Isn't that crazy?
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: Married multiple times. Shocker. Potentially ten times. Had at least
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: six children.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: Holy shit, look at how many times he was married. One, two, three, four.
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: Possibly ten.
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: Possibly ten.
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: Can you imagine just keep fucking signing up? I don't.
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: I just read literally the other day Fleetwood Mac guy
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: getting married for the fifth time.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: He's 182.
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: And he's getting like, what? Stop.
• 24:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: Why do you want to keep doing that? They believe.
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: They really believe this is it. This is the one.
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: You have to say those vows and mean it each time.
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: Or not.
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: Or just say, this is just a fun thing that
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: I do to keep a lady happy.
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, or just have a party, I guess.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, have a party and pretend that you're normal now.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: And you're married?
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah. How long you been married?
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: 17 years. Oh, nice.
• 24:58
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: It'll be fun. 14 in October.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: If I get divorced, that's a wrap. What do you mean?
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: Like I'm happy, happily married. I don't want to get divorced.
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: Not saying that. But if I ever get divorced, I'm never.
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, same here.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: Oh, I feel the same.
• 25:14
  Speaker 3: Silly.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: I'm not having any more children. So if I don't
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: have any children, it makes no sense. Yeah. To legally
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: be bound to some person. Can we just hang out?
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: I am 100% with you.
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: And I was never a– Anti-marriage guy. But I just
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: didn't think I'd get married because I didn't want to.
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: And then eventually I met somebody who I wanted to marry.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It's like you just have to. It has to.
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: I mean, that's the thing. It has to be the
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: right person. Everybody says that except Wally George. But the
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: idea of doing it 10 times is fucking insane. Yeah.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: They're doing a different thing.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: I think once you get. I'll give you three. And
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: let's say one of them was some fishy circumstances. I'll
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: give you three. Once you get on your— by the time
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: you're going to be on your fourth or fifth or
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: sixth or Rupert Murdoch marriage, like, what is the point?
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: And why does that woman believe you? What does it
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: say about the lady?
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: Well, what about ladies that do it? I've been here
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: for six years, and I know one lady. While I've
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: been here, she's been married twice. Married and divorced twice,
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: and now she's on the third guy.
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I would look, I mean, that says something about
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: the guys, right?
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: I guess.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, man, come on. If you, you wouldn't ever think, like,
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: you meet somebody, you like them, and then you find
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: out they've been married twice before in six years.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: And you were, like, starting to fall for her. You
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: wouldn't think, wait a minute.
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: You would, unless she was hot. Men are dumb. If
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: she's hot and she's sexy and you really like being
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: around her, you're like, who cares? She made mistakes.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: Who cares?
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: I guess you're right. If the sex is that good, too.
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, if the sex is good and she's hot and
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: you love being around her and that's what she wants
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: and you want to make her happy, like, okay.
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: I'll say this. You should find out. You should go
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: talk to the other guys and have a sit down.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: And find out why, you know.
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: Some guys, they'll want to mess it up for you.
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: So they'll lie. They might not be accurate. You know,
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: they might paint a, also they might've been the fuck
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: up and they want to blame it on her. And
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: then you'll get a distorted perception of who she is.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: But then, then it's back to her. That she's marrying people.
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: Who are fucked up. Just, I guess the point is
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: that we're both making is don't get married.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: You know, what is a weird thing? It's a weird
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: thing to do. Do you have children?
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: I do.
• 27:59
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: It's a weird thing to do if you don't have children,
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: not weird, like you shouldn't do it, but it's a
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: different thing.
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, completely. Yeah. You're I, I, and I, I would
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: say that, um, not that we, you know, my wife
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: and I have any, you know, real issues. Um, but
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: I would, uh, Behave myself and stay and work at
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: the marriage because of the kid.
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, absolutely.
• 28:30
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely. It fucks kids up when people get divorced.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: What's your background?
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: My parents were split up when I was five and
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: my mother remarried when I was seven and has been
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: with my stepdad ever since.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: Oh, that's good.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah. They have a great relationship. I just saw him
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: this weekend.
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: And where did you grow up?
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: Fucking everywhere. I was born in New Jersey. Moved to
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: San Francisco when I was seven. Lived in San Francisco
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: from seven to 11 in the height of the Vietnam
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: War in Haight-Ashbury, like hippie town. And then Florida from
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: 11 to 13. That's the opposite of San Francisco. Oh,
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: my God. Yeah. That's the first time I found out
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: about the N-word. I didn't know what it meant. And
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: I remember I had to ask my mom. No way. Yeah,
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: I had to ask my mom. I never heard it
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: in San Francisco. Never heard it. San Francisco in the
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: 1970s when I was between 7 and 11 was kind
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: of a wild, amazing time. It was really weird. It
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: was because we were in the middle of like the
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: counterculture movement. Berkeley, all that stuff. Yeah, we lived right
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: down the street from Lombard Street. So we were like
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: in the middle of it.
• 29:40
  Speaker 3: All.
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: And it's funny because it was during that time that
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: the Vietnam War ended. When did Vietnam end?
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: 74?
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: I think 74.
• 29:58
  Speaker 6: It's officially April 30, 75.
• 30:00
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: U.S.
• 30:02
  Speaker 6: Withdrawal 73.
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so that was like, how old was I?
• 30:06
  Speaker 6: Whatever.
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: The point is, like, at that time, I remember thinking,
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: thank God they figured out war is bad. We're never
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: going to do this again. I literally had that thought,
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: however old I was.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: What a naive child.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: Oh, I was like, whew. Because my stepfather had, he
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: didn't get drafted. He got lucky. He just didn't get picked.
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: And I knew a guy, some guy that was a
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: friend of the family that had moved to Canada. He's like,
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: fuck this. He took off to Canada. So I was
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: aware of that, like how people are leaving the country
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: so that they don't have to go to war. Because
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: if you're a little kid, everything's fucking scary, especially if
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: you come from a broken home.
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and the concept of a draft or conscription, the
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: idea like, oh, you may have to go and you're
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: going to learn how to shoot a gun and then
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: go shoot strangers, kids. Yeah. You know, like that has
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: got to be terrifying if you're a kid.
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: No, it was insane. And there was also the time
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: where my stepdad was a hippie and my parents were hippies.
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: I was going to.
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: Ask, why did your– sorry to interrupt, but why did
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: they move around so much?
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: My stepfather was a computer programmer initially and then he
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: wanted to become an architect. So he went to school
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: in San Francisco and then University of Florida in Gainesville.
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: and then Boston Architectural Center. So we moved to Boston
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: when I was 13. So that was what it was.
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: It was him becoming an architect.
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: And so they didn't like sports. They weren't into anything
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: like that. And then when Muhammad Ali was opposing the
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: Vietnam War, he became this counterculture hero.
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: Sure, yeah.
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: And I remember it was my parents sat down and
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: watched Muhammad Ali versus Leon Spinks. because he was trying
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: to win his title back. And they were rooting for
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: Muhammad Ali. I'm like, this is crazy. Like this guy's
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: stance on the Vietnam war has made my parents fans
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: of his to the point where they're going to watch boxing.
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: Like they never watched box. They didn't want to have
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: anything to do with anything violent. They hated it. And,
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: but they wanted to watch that.
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: One boxer to watch. If you are anti, you know,
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: hitting or boxing or whatever, it was Muhammad Ali. It
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: was a, A strategist, you know?
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: He was, but quite honestly, by that stage of his career,
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: he had slowed down considerably. And he just wasn't.
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: I remember the Leon Sphinx because he.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: Leon beat him. Yeah. And then he beat Leon in
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: the rematch. Right.
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: This is the rematch, right?
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: And that was the big one that we were all
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: glued to the TV. But I remember thinking, this is crazy.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: They're watching boxing. Because of this guy's position on the
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: Vietnam War.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: Have you seen When We Were Kings?
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's great.
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: It's amazing.
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's amazing. Yeah, he was a, God, you want
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: to talk about a unique human being. Like a one
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: of one. Yeah.
• 33:06
  Speaker 3: You know?
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And, you know, outside of, you know, Mike Tyson,
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: there was never any kind of figure like that in boxing. No.
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: I mean, there was minor— Sugar Ray Leonard a little bit,
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: but not.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: Not to that extent, because he wasn't a cultural figure. Right, right.
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: Muhammad Ali represented something during the Civil Rights Movement.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: And he changed his name to Muhammad Ali. Right, right.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: That was a big thing, too. People were terrified of
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: Muslims at the time. And still.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: I was going to say at the time.
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah. But it was a different kind of Muslims.
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: You know, that was— Well, they were the, you know,
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: the government was really good about portraying every black urban
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: person as, like, potentially, you know, Muslim Brotherhood.
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: Twelve Tribes.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: Right, right, right, right.
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: Those guys. They're still around. The Israelite Twelve Tribes.
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, those guys, yeah.
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: They used to be, they used to hang out in,
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: hang out? What am I, they used to be in
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: Times Square, like, you know, yelling and preaching.
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: I hung out with those guys one day. I wrote
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: a piece about it for my website because I went,
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: I was going home when I was living in New
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: York and I was walking down the street and there's
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: this guy standing there with like a microphone and a
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: little speaker and they would read things from the Bible
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: and they would translate it and they had this very
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: bizarre translation. Everybody was black. George Washington was black. Everyone
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: was black. They were explaining to me, you know, the
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: so-called Jew They're black Israelites. The so-called Jews, the thing
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: that they always think.
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: Well, they're Jewish. Yeah, you don't have to say the
• 34:53
  Speaker 2: so-called part. Yeah, it was very odd. But their whole
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: thing was there was a 12th tribe of the Israelites
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: that were black that have been written out of history.
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that was their thing.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: They also informed me that I'm not white. That was
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: a relief. Because I'm Italian. They're like, oh, you ain't white.
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh.
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's like the.
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: Because they hated white people. So I was just talking
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: to this because I was bored. You know, I was just.
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: So I was talking to this guy. I was having
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: him explain everything to me. And he informed me. Don't worry, man.
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: You're not white. I was like, oh, OK, that's good.
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: It's good to know.
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: So you can hang out. I can hang out with
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: you guys.
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: You don't hate me. But it was very odd. Very odd.
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: They're all dressed like superheroes. They all have these crazy, like,
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: Avenger costumes on.
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and, like, jewelry.
• 35:48
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: Like, big, chunky jewelry. Yeah, huge medallions around their neck.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: Very odd stuff.
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: There's still, you don't see them like you used to,
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: but they're still out there.
• 35:58
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah.
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they're out there.
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: But I mean, like, literally in New York, periphery of
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: Times Square.
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, last time I was in Philadelphia, I saw them.
• 36:07
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: They were out there on the street with the microphones.
• 36:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: A little deal. Yeah. Yeah. It's an odd group.
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: When were you in New York?
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: I was in New York. I moved to New York
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: in 91. Yeah. So I started stand up in 88
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: in Boston and I got picked up by my manager
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: who I'm still with when I was essentially an open miker.
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: Who was that? Jeff Sussman.
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: How do I not know Jeff Sussman?
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: He handles Kevin James.
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: Was he a Boston guy?
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: No, he was a New York guy.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay, okay.
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: So the story was he had, what was his name?
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: And the guy who had all the crazy costumes, he
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: was on the Rodney Dangerfield special, Bob Nelson.
• 36:53
  Speaker 2: Bob Nelson, yeah.
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: So he handled Bob Nelson.
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: The Cleveland Browns.
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: He put the helmet on. He had boxing gloves. He
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: did Jippy Jeff's gym. He had brain damage. He did
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: a bunch of different characters. So Bob, who is a
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: big act, he had an HBO special, the whole deal
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: at the time, he found Jesus. Where was he? In
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: his basement, I guess.
• 37:16
  Speaker 3: Oh, shit.
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: Or something. Okay. Around the neighborhood. Somewhere. Okay. But he
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: had this guy who was his prayer partner that was
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: going to take over as his manager. And so this
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: was my manager's big client. So he's like, fuck. Like,
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: I got to go find some other comedians.
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: So did he just stop doing stand-up?
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know if he still does stand-up.
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 37:44
  Speaker 3: I knew.
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: My manager's really good, and he's very smart, and he
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: did a great job guiding Bob. But I think sometimes
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: when people have a big religious moment like that, maybe
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: that becomes more of their life. Because he was all in.
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: He was all in with Christianity. And so my manager said, well,
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: I kind of know most of the comics in New York.
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: Let me see if I'm not missing people in Boston.
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: And so he traveled to Boston with a friend of his,
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: one of the guys that owned Governors.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: Well, Governors was Bob's room, wasn't it?
• 38:24
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 38:24
  Speaker 2: Out in Long Island.
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: One of the rooms that he worked at, yeah. And
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: so they came down to Boston, and I just randomly
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: went up one night at Duck Soup. Remember Duck Soup?
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: Duck Soup. Duck Soup was– it became the improv after
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: a while. It was– I don't remember that. Billy Downs
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: and- Paul Barclay. Paul Barclay. I think it was actually
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: Billy split. I think it was Paul's thing.
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: Oh, they had split at that point?
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: I think. I'm not sure about that. But what it was,
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: it was Paul's idea, I believe. It was a much
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: more high-end room. Like, it was really nice. And it
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: was right across from Nick's. So it was in the
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: below area where the Wiltern is.
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: So you know where the Wiltern is, which is now
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: the big, you know, where Bill Blumenreit does comedy connection shows?
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the Wilbur, right?
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Is that it?
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: The Wilbur.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: It's the Wil... Okay, I'm thinking the Wiltern's LA.
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: At Wiltern's LA. Right, I know what you're talking about.
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: The Wilbur. Right, you're right. So downstairs, the Wilbur, you'd
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: go down, and it was a really nice room.
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: And I was a limo driver at the time. I
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: was driving limos, and.
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: a limo in Boston?
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Jesus.
• 39:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah.
• 39:33
  Speaker 5: Oh, man.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: That's what I was doing for a job. That's fucking.
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: I mean, I just mean the literal streets of Boston are...
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: Tough to navigate with any vehicle, but a limo, add
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: an extra half a car to it.
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It wasn't that bad. It was mostly airport pickups,
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: and a lot of it was town cars, pick people
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: up in town cars. But when you drive around a lot,
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: that's when I would come up with my best ideas.
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: And I had an idea for a joke, and I called, God,
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: I can't remember who the guy was. Fuck, I can't
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: believe I'm blanking on his name. He was a really
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: cool dude who was the manager of the club. And
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: I could call him up and say, hey, can I
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: get a guest spot? And he gave me a guest
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: spot that night. I wasn't even supposed to be on
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: the show. And my manager just happened to be in
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: the room. And if I'd known he was in the room,
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: I probably would have been nervous and I probably would
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: have bombed. And I had no idea he was there.
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: And then he came up to me afterwards and gave
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: me his card and he said, can I see you tomorrow?
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: And I said, okay. And then I did it.
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: He just meant for a ride to the airport.
• 40:34
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: So I did a set at the Connection the next night,
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: and then he asked me to come to New York
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: and audition there.
• 40:42
  Speaker 7: Wow.
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: And then next thing you know, I was living in
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: New York. It was like three years later.
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: Very cool.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it was a crazy, crazy story.
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: And when did you move out to L.A.? 94, 93.
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: First came out in 93 and then moved in 94.
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: I came out to 93 for a pilot. I did
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: a pilot on Fox called Hardball. with Jim Brewer and
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: a bunch of other people. It was a baseball sitcom
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: on Fox that got canceled. It was terrible. And then
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: the only reason why I stayed, I hated LA, but
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: the only reason why I stayed was because I had
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: got an apartment and I had a lease for a year.
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: So I was like, fuck, I have to stay here.
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: And so I stayed for a whole year. And then
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: I got a development deal for NBC. And I was
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: there in the middle of this whole development deal. And
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: then they said, we have a pilot. That we already filmed,
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: but we're going to fire one of the cast members.
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: We want you to audition for this. And that was
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: news radio. So I got to watch.
• 41:40
  Speaker 2: Who did you replace?
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: Well, fortunately, it was Ray Romano, who was a good
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: friend of mine, was fired during the pilot. And so
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: they replaced him with another guy. And that guy got fired.
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: Oh, wow.
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So it wasn't, I would have felt terrible if
• 41:58
  Speaker 1: it was Ray.
• 41:59
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: But it was Ray being replaced. So I was like, good,
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: fuck that guy. I'll do it for Ray.
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: Do you remember who the other guy was?
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: I do not. He was just an actor. Some guy.
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: I mean, I never met him. I'm sure he's a
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: nice guy. But luckily for Ray, he goes on and
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: does Everybody Loves Raymond. It becomes huge. And I just
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: stumbled into this fucking show with no acting experience.
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: That was a fun set.
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: I remember... His radio was the best.
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: Because I did it a couple times. And... And... Also,
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: like that was not my first, but one of the
• 42:32
  Speaker 2: first experiences I had with multi-camera sitcoms. You know, you're like,
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: this is literally the easiest job on planet Earth.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. It is.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: You have one full day. You have like a full,
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: I think Thursday, right?
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: And then Friday is like half a day.
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: Monday, come in, listen to this, read the script, go away.
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's the filming day that's the long day. And
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: it's not that bad. I mean, especially once we got loose.
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: The first season was hard. The first season was 12,
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: 14-hour days because it was like they were trying to
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: figure out what the show was. But once it got rolling,
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: it was pretty amazing. So I had only been doing
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: stand-up for six years. I had done no acting. They
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: made me get an acting coach for a little while
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: in New York, which I think was counterintuitive.
• 43:24
  Speaker 2: News radio?
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: For a pilot, for the pilot, the Fox pilot.
• 43:28
  Speaker 8: Oh.
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, how's an acting coach going to help you
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: with a sitcom? It's about instinct. It's about.
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: Well, they were giving me a lot of money. They
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: gave me like $ 150, 000.
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: I mean, I understand why you.
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: They're like, you have to learn how to act. Right.
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: Do you know how to act? I'm like, I've never acted.
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: I'm just saying like.
• 43:45
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: To deliver... sitcom lines is you don't need an acting
• 43:49
  Speaker 2: teacher Joseph let's limber up the body.
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah you're not Daniel Day Lewis you're not doing there
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: will be blood it was a it was weird because
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: it wasn't anything I think the reason why it worked
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: out so well is because it was never anything that
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: I wanted so there was no weight to it it
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: wasn't like oh my god this is it I am
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: on a sitcom I'm acting it was more like this
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: is crazy I can't believe I'm doing this You know,
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: it was more like, wow, I can't believe I get
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: to do this. But, you know, the real thing for
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: me was to be able to be in L.A. and
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: go to the comedy store. That to me was more–
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: that was more huge than– like when I got passed
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: at the comedy store, that to me was like way
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: bigger than being on a sitcom. I was like, holy shit.
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: Like because at that– you know, like at six years in,
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: I was like, am I even– is this going to
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: work out? Like I don't even know if this is
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: going to work out.
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: Well, it's also not– glamorous in any way that, that
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: aspect of, uh, working is there's nothing glamorous about a sitcom.
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean? It's not the thing that
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: when you're not in LA or Hollywood and you're sitting
• 45:01
  Speaker 2: back and you're, you are told about the glamorous lifestyle,
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: the parties and all that stuff. It's literally, you're driving
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: to work and you're going to work, you know?
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah. But it was glamorous in a sense that you
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: were on television and, And that was very weird to me.
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: It was very strange to watch it on TV. I'm like,
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: that is actually me on TV. I had zero aspirations
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: for any acting at all. It never even occurred to me.
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: When I lived in Boston, I remember me and Fitzsimmons,
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: we used to dream about the day we could pay
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: our bills telling jokes. That was all it was.
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: I hear you.
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: It was just like, oh, God. I would see guys
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: like DJ Hazard. I remember- I went to look at
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: this apartment and DJ Hazard lived in the same building.
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: And it was this converted schoolhouse and these loft apartments.
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: And it had like a second floor where the bedroom was.
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: And I looked over the living room. I'm like, God,
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: he pays for this with jokes. This was like the
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: most amazing thing. That's all I wanted. I saw these
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: like Don Gavin and Steve Sweeney. I was like, Imagine
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: being able to pay your bills just telling jokes.
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: Untie my ankles in the morning. Remember that?
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I do. DJ Hazard? Yeah. What was I going
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: to say?
• 46:20
  Speaker 2: Oh, do you know Fitzsimmons' Paul Barclay story or Bill
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: Downs' The Watch? Bill Downs. It was Bill Downs.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: Which one? How's it go?
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: Oh, you should get it from him because it's his story. But,
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: and I don't want to, I feel like it's his
• 46:41
  Speaker 2: to tell, but it's fucking great. It's genius.
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: It's bringing up something in my memory.
• 46:47
  Speaker 2: So, so Bill owed everybody money.
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 46:51
  Speaker 2: And, uh, like he's still, you know, those guys owe
• 46:54
  Speaker 2: me whatever it is at this point, you know, what, 300, $ 500.
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: And just, and you go there and they were just.
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: Everybody was big guy. Remember? Yeah. I'll pay you soon.
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: Big guy. Oh, the war.
• 47:06
  Speaker 2: And then do you remember when Bill adopted the girls?
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: Yes. Korean girls, right?
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: He, yeah. And he would use them like as, because
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: at a certain point, it didn't help to go to
• 47:23
  Speaker 2: the connection or go to the clubs. And you had
• 47:26
  Speaker 2: to go to their fucking office. If you want it,
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: nobody's going to call you back or whatever. And you'd like,
• 47:33
  Speaker 2: I got to get on the team, go to the,
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: go to their office. And that's the only way I'm
• 47:37
  Speaker 2: going to get money is if I show up and
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: he's in a good mood and it's not going to
• 47:42
  Speaker 2: happen from a phone call. And I'd go there every
• 47:46
  Speaker 2: single time. It's like, dude, I got to pay my rent, man.
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: I mean, I, I got nothing. And you owe me,
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: you know, $ 385. And back then that was huge. And, uh, ah,
• 47:58
  Speaker 2: cross eyes. Listen, So I get these, my kids, one
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: of my kids is sick. Whatever, it was always this
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: fucking excuse. And then, you know, it was still the
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: Coke residual in the bottom of his nose. But so
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: he owed Fitzsimmons a chunk of money, like a significant amount,
• 48:22
  Speaker 2: like $ 1, 500, $ 1, 800. Like something meaty, you know, especially for
• 48:25
  Speaker 2: back then.
• 48:25
  Speaker 7: And.
• 48:33
  Speaker 2: You ask Greg, cause I feel, I feel like, no.
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: Tell the story. I'm sure Greg's told it to me. Okay.
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: Greg and I are pretty close. I just remember it
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: in my head. I do remember part of it, but
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: I don't know the whole story. I don't remember it.
• 48:45
  Speaker 2: All right. So Greg was, uh, booked at this, uh,
• 48:51
  Speaker 2: you know, some shit club in New Hampshire or whatever.
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: And Downs was going to be there. Uh, Bill was
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: going to be there. And, uh, um, and he goes,
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: he goes there and he goes, uh, oh, Bill, I
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: forgot my watch. I don't want to go over. Can
• 49:08
  Speaker 2: I borrow your watch? And he's like, yeah, sure. It's
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: like a Rolex, like some fancy, fancy, fancy watch. And
• 49:15
  Speaker 2: Greg had this all planned out.
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: Oh, I know the story now.
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then he had like parked in a... specific place.
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: And then he gets– he's like, all right, thanks. And
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: he's like, all right, don't forget to give it back. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: And he does his set. And then he bolts out
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: the back door, gets in his car, drives home, back
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: to Boston. And then Bill calls him. Hey, so– I
• 49:39
  Speaker 2: think you forgot to give me my watch back. And
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: Greg just basically goes, yeah, you want it back? Give
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: me the $ 1, 800 you owe me. And then met him
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: at a restaurant or a diner somewhere in a public place.
• 49:53
  Speaker 2: Give me the cash and I'll give you your watch.
• 49:55
  Speaker 2: And it was just genius.
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: That's Greg.
• 49:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 49:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: Those days were fun. Nick's Comedy Stop used to offer
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: to pay you in cocaine or cash.
• 50:04
  Speaker 2: Dude, so I did Nick's. And the only, I've said
• 50:10
  Speaker 2: this multiple times, the only, I'm extremely lucky that I
• 50:15
  Speaker 2: was in Boston when I was in Boston because the
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: comedy boom's going on. And outside of, I don't know,
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: three places, I just didn't do that well. And I
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: certainly didn't do well at Nick's. I mean, I was
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: the opposite. They, you know, it had that. the vague
• 50:34
  Speaker 2: feeling of high school where you're the weirdo and people
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: want to fuck with you and throw you in the
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: trash can. And, uh, and so I got lucky because
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: there were just spots, they just needed bodies. So I
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: worked all the time, you know, not, you know, not
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: great gigs, but I had, it was all cash, you know,
• 50:53
  Speaker 2: under the table and, and they just needed bodies to, to,
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: you know, go up and do, 15 minutes, 20 minutes, whatever,
• 51:02
  Speaker 2: at some cowboy bar in Fittsburg or whatever, uh, Fitchburg. Um, anyway, uh,
• 51:08
  Speaker 2: so I get this, I get a week at Nick's and, um,
• 51:14
  Speaker 2: and I am not doing well at all. I think
• 51:17
  Speaker 2: I'm opening up for Kevin Knox. So not my crowd
• 51:22
  Speaker 2: and I didn't have the track suit. Um, uh, and
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: you know, Knox, he's up there doing, uh, Hey, you
• 51:31
  Speaker 2: know why Bill Buckner didn't catch the ball or get
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: the ball? It's the 86 World Series. Because he heard
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: it had AIDS on it. Okay. Yeah, that's a real joke.
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: That's a real joke. And they loved it more.
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: Wonderful.
• 51:48
  Speaker 2: Yes, of course it had AIDS on it.
• 51:51
  Speaker 5: 1986.
• 51:52
  Speaker 2: And then, do you remember this? What does AIDS stand for?
• 51:55
  Speaker 4: No.
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: What? Adios, infected dick sucker.
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: Oh, I do remember that. I do. I'm opening for him. Oh,
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: my God.
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: And it's his crowd. Adios, infected dick sucker.
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. Yeah. So I.
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: Titled one of the tracks on my first album, I think,
• 52:17
  Speaker 2: first or second album, What If Baseballs Had AIDS On Them.
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: Jesse?
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: Jesse.
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: Jesse.
• 52:28
  Speaker 2: And I'm fucking eating it, right? So they're peeling back
• 52:33
  Speaker 2: my time as the week goes on. And I am,
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: I mean, if I had done even okay, I wouldn't
• 52:43
  Speaker 2: have had this feeling. They're already kind of intimidating, right?
• 52:47
  Speaker 2: Super mobby.
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: Very mob.
• 52:49
  Speaker 2: Very mob. And do you remember where you'd walk into
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: Nick's and there was like the podium and then behind,
• 52:55
  Speaker 2: a little behind it, is this little room with a curtain, right?
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: And it's, uh, not big at all. And, I went
• 53:03
  Speaker 2: to go get paid and my, the week was over
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: and I'm, and I've just, you know, eaten it, eat
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: shit every single night, every single show. And, um, and
• 53:14
  Speaker 2: they're all eating, it's like a scene from, like, they're
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: all eating, like, you know, manicotti. Right, right. Just couldn't
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: make it any better with the fucking napkins in their, uh,
• 53:23
  Speaker 2: you know, in their shirt like this. And, uh, and
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: I go, uh, Hey, nervous as shit, just, hey, so Dom,
• 53:32
  Speaker 2: I need to, if I can get paid, just for the,
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: you know, whatever. And Dominic goes to whoever, I can't
• 53:40
  Speaker 2: remember the guy's name, his kind of lackey there. And
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: he goes, whatever his name was, you know, Pauly, go
• 53:47
  Speaker 2: pay the kid. And he's, I've interrupted his dinner. He's
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: not happy. Fucking napkin off, blah, blah, blah. Takes me,
• 53:56
  Speaker 2: we go up to the offices upstairs and there's a
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: safe and it's open and there's cash and there's a gun.
• 54:06
  Speaker 2: This is just open, right? And he gives me, he
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: gets the money and he gives it to me and
• 54:12
  Speaker 2: I just pick it up. I want to get the
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: fuck out of there. And I pick it up and
• 54:15
  Speaker 2: he's like, are you going to count it?
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: No, I'm good.
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: I trust you. And I just bolted. I never went
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: back there again. I was so fucking intimidated.
• 54:26
  Speaker 1: That was an intimidating place.
• 54:28
  Speaker 6: Oh, dude.
• 54:29
  Speaker 2: The whole thing about it. Dominic, all those guys.
• 54:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 54:34
  Speaker 2: And everyone's doing blow. The performers are at least.
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: It was a maniacal time. There was one time where
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: Nix was running three consecutive shows. So they had their
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: main room upstairs. There was a dance club down in
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: the bottom. And there was one other room. somewhere in
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: that building. And guys would go, guys like Don Gavin,
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: Steve Sweeney, they would go and do a set, a set,
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: a set, set, a set, a set. And these guys
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: were just raking in money. Oh, yeah. And constantly doing
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: a blow and not paying their taxes. Yeah. Yes. And
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: that's what got them all.
• 55:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, they, I mean, back in the heyday, and
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: it went on for years, it was years and years
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: of this. I mean, you'd You could go down, you know,
• 55:21
  Speaker 2: 128 and do Kowloons or whatever and then just hop
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: all the way back. Hop into these Chinese restaurants or whatever.
• 55:28
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 55:28
  Speaker 1: Giggles and sagas. Yeah.
• 55:29
  Speaker 2: And just go in a straight line and go back
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: and forth and do nine fucking shows and make a
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: shit ton of money, cash under the table, tons of blow.
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And yeah. It was a wild place because there
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: were so many comics. Boston's not a big city. And
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: to have so much comedy all come out. You've seen
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: Fran Salamita's documentary. I haven't.
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: I got to.
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: It's really great.
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: When stand-up stood out.
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's really great.
• 55:59
  Speaker 2: I got to.
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: It's really great. It's really great. And it goes all
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: the way back to Crimmins and the Ding Ho.
• 56:05
  Speaker 5: Mm-hmm.
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: And that was before my time. I started in 88,
• 56:09
  Speaker 1: so the ding-ho was already gone. You heard legendary stories
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: from the ding-ho.
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: Did you see Call Me Lucky?
• 56:15
  Speaker 7: No.
• 56:16
  Speaker 2: Oh, you've got to see that. It's Bobcat's documentary about Barry.
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: Oh, no, wait a minute. I did see that.
• 56:24
  Speaker 2: It's fucking great.
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: I did see that. It's really well done.
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: I don't mean just, like, even if you don't know Barry,
• 56:30
  Speaker 2: just the story and the way he lays out the
• 56:34
  Speaker 2: path of the, The film is great.
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: I had Barry on, like, right after it came out.
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: I had him on the podcast.
• 56:43
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 56:43
  Speaker 2: He's a legend and, you know, huge inspiration.
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: He was an intimidating guy. Yeah. That was the guy
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: that I was scared of because he was, like, he
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: was the guy who was sort of the standard. Like,
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: he made sure there was no hacks. He made sure
• 57:02
  Speaker 1: there was, you know, like, he set the standard. And
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: he was really equitable too. Yes, yes. Very politically active.
• 57:11
  Speaker 1: Even like way back then, like really knowledgeable and like
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: really understood what was going on in the world.
• 57:17
  Speaker 2: Did you ever see his– or one of his State
• 57:21
  Speaker 2: of the Union shows?
• 57:22
  Speaker 4: No.
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: They're fucking amazing. So he would go– I saw a
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: couple of them at the Old Stitches. And he would
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: go up and it was when the State of the
• 57:33
  Speaker 2: Union– was happening he'd go up and he'd do his
• 57:37
  Speaker 2: State of the Union it was just him and he
• 57:39
  Speaker 2: would go on and he'd have like you know it
• 57:43
  Speaker 2: was pre-Powerpoint but it was whatever the equivalent of you
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: know a screen behind him with stuff and he'd go
• 57:50
  Speaker 2: up there with a cooler like a legit big cooler
• 57:54
  Speaker 2: of beer because that motherfucker could drink and and he
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: would just start he had a podium and And he
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: would just crack beers and just down a case of
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: beer or half a case of beer and just do
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: his stuff, extemporaneous stuff. I mean stuff prepared, but about
• 58:15
  Speaker 2: the State of the Union and all that. And it
• 58:17
  Speaker 2: would always be packed. And you'd see Dennis Leary and
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: every single comic would be there up against the wall
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: because it was packed. But it was great. I mean legendary. Legendary.
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, I think he was really responsible for
• 58:31
  Speaker 1: a lot of what Boston comedy became, you know, because
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: he was the guy that was kind of the gold standard.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: And he started the Ding Ho.
• 58:39
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 58:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And he is like becoming friends with him was like, whew,
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: like such a relief because I was terrified of him.
• 58:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 58:47
  Speaker 1: When I was a young comic, like if that guy
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: thought I sucked, if he hated me, I was like,
• 58:51
  Speaker 1: I'm fucking doomed.
• 58:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: You know, because he was this character. He would go
• 58:55
  Speaker 1: on stage. with a sport coat on and reach into
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: his inner pocket and pull out a Budweiser for every show.
• 59:02
  Speaker 1: Remember that?
• 59:03
  Speaker 2: I don't, but I mean, I know he drank a lot.
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but he would bring his own beer. It was
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: part of his thing. He would go on stage just
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: reach into his... Pull out a Budweiser and set it
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: down on the stool. I... He only drank American beer.
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: Is that true? Yeah, he would drink Budweiser.
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: I wonder why that is.
• 59:19
  Speaker 1: I don't know. He was kind of a patriot.
• 59:25
  Speaker 2: He doesn't seem like he would... The kind of guy
• 59:27
  Speaker 2: who would have denied himself... Well, I mean, maybe it
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: was performative.
• 59:32
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Was there Modelo even did exist at
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: the time?
• 59:36
  Speaker 2: But yeah, he was he was the only guy I
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: would say that and to your point, like all these
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: other legendary comics, you know, Lenny Clark and Don Gavin
• 59:52
  Speaker 2: and Steve Sweeney and all those guys. It was the
• 59:54
  Speaker 2: only guy that those guys were kind of. walking on eggshells.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: Yes. The only guy.
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: The only guy.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 2: They'd give all each other shit.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 2: And mean shit, too.
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: Oh, they would fight. Oh, yeah.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: Barry was the one guy.
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: They wouldn't fuck with. Well, he was different than all
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: of them in that he was incredibly well-read. Like, really well-read,
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: really knowledgeable about all sorts of things with economics and
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: the way the world works and the injustices of our society.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: But really funny fucking comic too like great jokes great
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 1: writer you know and just like he was the standard
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: he was the glue that held that scene together because
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 1: they all looked at him to be like like you
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 1: can't kind of step out of line like you don't
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: want to get catch Barry's.
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: R yeah it's absolutely true yeah and then when the
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: revelation he had of being abused as a kid and
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: then he dedicated, he spoke in front of Congress. He
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 2: did about AOL.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah. During the early days of AOL, for people that
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: don't know, they had all these chat rooms and sexual
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: predators were using these chat rooms to find children. Yeah.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: And also to exchange pornographic material.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: And that was, that was, that becomes a big part
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 2: of call me lucky, you know? Right. Right.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 2: And, yeah, he, like, dedicated his life basically to just
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 2: going out and catching these motherfuckers.
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 2: And helping, you know, the people who would pose as
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 2: kids and stuff. And that was, you know, that was his.
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 2: And he was also, you know, lapsed Catholic. And when
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 2: all the, especially in Boston, the Catholic Church and diocese
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 2: and all that stuff was coming out. He was, I mean,
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: that was his fucking focus.
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 2: Getting these fuckers caught, you know, exposed.
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: Well, I think it took someone like him that was,
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: he was levels above most of the other comedians in
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 1: terms of his understanding of the world and his ability
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: to articulate it. And also a great comic. So that, like,
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 1: people looked at him like, well, this guy's, like, he's
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: clearly smarter than all of us. He's also like super
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: dedicated to the craft of comedy, like meant a lot
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: to him.
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah.
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: Like the integrity of comedy, like what it is to
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: be a comic.
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 2: You know, and he came from, and I think this
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: is kind of specific to Boston, too. He came from
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 2: a jock world. He was a minor league or whatever
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 2: sub-minor league catcher. He played, he was at Syracuse University,
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 2: and he played for like the Cape Cod League and,
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 2: you know, the things that eventually you get to minor leagues, hopefully.
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 2: And he came from that hard drinking, you know. And
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 2: Catcher is arguably the smartest guy in the baseball team, right?
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: Right. He's the guy making the calls for the pitches.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: Seeing everything, defensive lineups. So he came from that world, too,
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 2: which I think helped his cred.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: Well, it's just such an unusual town in what happened
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 1: there that these guys became these local legends where they
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 1: never had to leave. And they kind of did the
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: same act for decades, which is also kind of crazy.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: That to me was like I knew there was definitely
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 2: a– as I started to separate from that world a
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 2: little bit and just kind of evolving as a– comedian,
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 2: and there was, like, the catch scene in Catch a
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 2: Rising Star, and that was a thing that was an early...
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 2: I just didn't get it. Like, why are you doing
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 2: the same... There's no joy in it. And then you
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 2: would drive some of these guys, because they get fucked up,
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 2: and you were happy to have all the work, and
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: you'd go up and do 15, and they'd do a
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: half hour, and you'd get in the car, and you'd
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 2: go somewhere else, and these guys doing... Mike Donovan doing
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: he would do his remember Rosie the bounty the quicker
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 2: picker upper the bounty yeah okay so he had there
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 2: was a so the commercials were like Rosie uh and
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: it was like the scrappy uh waitress at a diner
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 2: remember it was like a character that was in all
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 2: the it was like the the you know mascot of
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 2: whatever bounty the quicker picker upper and her character was
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 2: kind of like feisty as in these commercials ran for years,
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 2: you know, different like, ah, you don't do this, do this.
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 2: And his bit was about taking a gun out and
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 2: shooting her. Um, it was funny. You'd see it the
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: first time, but it's like, dude, that hasn't been on
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 2: the air in fucking 10 years. And he's still doing this. Uh, yeah, Rosie,
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 2: I got something for you. I got a, I got
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 2: some advice for you. Like what the fuck? And there was, okay, wait, Joe,
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 2: Did you, were you there? So, Ed, the machine regime.
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: I remember him.
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 2: So.
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 1: He wear the suit?
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 3: Yep.
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, and his headshot was four different, his headshot
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 2: was like four squares.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 1: And different characters. Yep.
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 2: Tina Turner.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 2: And guy, the like mob guy. I can't remember the
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 2: rest of them. And then, you know, whatever.
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 1: I think he had a turban in one of them.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 2: I'm sure he did. So he goes to jail for
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 2: rolling back odometers.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: Yes, that's right.
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 2: So he gets caught, and he was a car salesman,
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 2: I think, in Rhode Island, I believe. And he got
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 2: caught rolling back the odometers. He goes to jail for
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 2: a year and a half. And I was shooting this movie.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 2: This is decades later. I was shooting this movie, and
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 2: it was on a cruise ship. And the cruise ship, Ed,
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 2: the Machine Regime, is the headliner at the comedy venue
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: on the cruise ship. And I'm like, oh, shit. That's crazy.
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 2: I haven't seen this guy in forever. And he's back
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 2: doing comedy?
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 2: And I go there, and he does, I don't know,
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 2: 40 minutes. The same fucking act from 15 years ago.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 2: It's like, you don't have one? You spent 18 months
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 2: in prison.
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 1: You don't have one joke?
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 2: You don't have one motherfucking observation? Even if you lie
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 2: and say, you know, it would be weird if you
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 2: were in prison and whatever. You don't have anything?
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 1: It's weird. It was a weird thing. And it only
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 1: existed with them. Most comics in the country were writing
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: new material all the time.
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 2: I remember that feeling of, I must be different. Because
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 2: I'm not, I don't, that is such a distasteful thing. Like,
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't want to do that.
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: Well, there was two, I saw two traps there. One
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 1: of them was that, and the other one was never leaving. Yeah.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 1: They never left Boston. And when they did leave Boston,
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 1: they had so much local material that their act was, like,
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 1: cut down by, like, 40%.
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 2: And there were a lot of people, their peers, who
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 2: would give them shit. And it was all just kind
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 2: of resentful, jealousy, small-minded, small-town, kind of like, oh, you
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 2: think you're better than us, which is a Boston thing, too. Oh,
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 2: you think you're so hot now that you're a hot shot?
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 2: You go to Hollywood? You go there?
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 2: Fuck you. It was a real provincial, working-class kind of attitude.
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 2: They looked down on us. And, you know, they would
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 2: give Leary shit all the time, you know, like sellout.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 2: This is bullshit weird.
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 1: Sellout's a weird one because they would all sold out.
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 1: It just wasn't available. Well, they were all mad at
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 1: Stephen Wright. Were they? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because so Stephen
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 1: Wright was like this.
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 2: How can you get mad at Stephen Wright?
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 1: Well, not mad at him, but bitter because of his success. Oh.
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: Because he went and left. Yeah.
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 1: He went and left, did The Tonight Show.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 1: Became huge. So unusual. So different. And they came to Boston.
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 1: The Tonight Show came to Boston to look for comics.
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 1: And Stephen Wright was the one they chose. And all
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 1: these other guys were like, he's a fucking middle act. Like,
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 1: this is bullshit. Like, that guy bombs half the time.
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 1: Cause his act to me was a lot like Hedberg
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 1: in that if you didn't know what he was doing
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 1: and you came to see specific, like if Hedberg, there's
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 1: a famous story of Hedberg was on the road in
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 1: Ohio and they had this guy who was an opening
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: act to do like backflips and fucking sing rap songs.
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 1: And it was, it was a disaster and Hedberg kept bombing.
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: And so they switched them. and made Hedberg the middle
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 1: act and tried to fuck him on the money, and
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 1: Stanhope got into it with the owner of the club,
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 1: and it became a big thing. But once Hedberg got
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 1: an audience, then people knew what they were coming to see,
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 1: and then it was amazing. And then everybody wanted to
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 1: see that. That was kind of the same with Stephen Wright. Like,
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 1: if you expected, if you're on a show with Steve
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 1: Sweeney and Lenny Clark and all these big energy fucking
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 1: Boston guys... And then I used to work at a
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 1: fire hydrant factory. Couldn't park anywhere near the place. It
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 1: just– for whatever reason– Well, it's.
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 2: Also– that other comedy is– And I'm not taking anything
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 2: away from those guys. And the bits were great. But
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 2: the other comedy is a little easier. It just, you
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 2: get it.
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 2: And with Stephen Wright, you got to think about it
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 2: for a second.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 1: It was abstract. It was low key. It was all
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 1: non sequiturs. It was one to another. It was... And
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 1: so when he left and took off, a lot of
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 1: guys apparently were like, this is fucking bullshit. Like, when's
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 1: my turn going to happen?
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 2: I can see that easily. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that was...
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 2: It was so.
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 2: I mean, no other scene had that kind of weird provincial,
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 2: you know, and that thing, like you said, they wouldn't leave.
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 1: No, they never left. Well, they were huge there. So
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 1: if they lived there, they could make like a couple
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 1: hundred thousand dollars a year just running around and cash.
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 2: Oh, easy.
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And not ever have to worry about anything. And
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 1: they played golf all day. So there's two things that
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 1: scared me. One of them was golf because I saw
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 1: that when you play golf, you kind of stop trying
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: with your comedy.
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 2: It's a slippery slope.
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 1: So many hours.
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 2: It's a gateway drug.
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:11:01
  Speaker 1: Well, you're out there for fucking eight hours a day. Like,
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 1: Noxy was always playing golf. And then the other thing was, like,
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 1: if you never left, you had no chance of developing, like,
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 1: a national audience where you could go to a club
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 1: in Philadelphia. You can go to a club. They couldn't
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 1: do the road. And I remember thinking, oh, this is
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 1: a trap.
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure.
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, and as you said, they. Half of
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 2: their stand-up was like, you'd have to know about, you know,
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 2: Storo Drive or fucking.
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: Johnny Most.
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 2: You know Johnny Most?
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, remember Donovan's bit about Johnny Most? It was amazing.
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 1: But it was like, he was doing that bit long
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 1: after Johnny Most was dead. So like 20 people in
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 1: the audience would be howling, laughing, and everybody else would
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 1: be like, who the fuck is Johnny Most? God. Yeah.
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: It was weird because it was like a velvet prison.
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: It's like how I describe like really great comics that
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 1: get jobs in the writer's room. And I'm like, you
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 1: got to be careful. Like that's a velvet prison. Because
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 1: if you get stuck in that writer's room and you
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 1: never do the road, you never put out specials, you're
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 1: never going to get an audience. You're always going to
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 1: be beholden to an employer. You're always going to have
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 1: to have a job. And there's great comics that got
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 1: trapped with that.
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 2: But wouldn't you say that if they, yes, it's a trap,
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 2: but if they didn't have the wherewithal or foresight or
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 2: willpower to get out of that trap then they probably
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 2: weren't meant to.
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 1: Do that thing perhaps but sometimes they get a mortgage
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 1: and then they get a family and then they're.
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 2: Stuck that's the trap yeah family let's call it for
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 2: what it is yeah it's.
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 1: A trap and well in a lot of ways it
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 1: can be if you're trying to be an actual national
• 1:12:48
  Speaker 1: level like do you know Owen Smith comic in LA
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 1: no One of the top 20 best comics on earth.
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 1: He's fucking brilliant. He's so funny.
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 2: Owen Smith.
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 1: Owen Smith. Saw him at the comedy store. And I
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: remember the first time I saw him at the comedy store,
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 1: I'm like, how is this guy not fucking huge? He's
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 1: so funny. He's so good. He has this bit about
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 1: adopting a white kid and naming him the N-word. Yeah.
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 1: It's just like really– it's a really funny, well-crafted bit.
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 1: Like all of his bits are like brilliantly written. He's
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 1: a great performer. He's super likable. Got writer's gigs and
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 1: just– he does The Mothership a couple times a year
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 1: I believe, at least once a year. But just doesn't
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 1: get out there.
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 2: Who does he write or what show does he write?
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 1: I think he's a showrunner now. Oh, well, that. So
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 1: it took it to another level.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 1: But just– got jobs writing when he was struggling as
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: a comic, and those jobs eventually led to a house.
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 2: But maybe he, you know, was like, you watch him
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 2: and you love him, right? Because you see a lot
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 2: of stand-up and you're like, a lot of it's shit,
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 2: and this guy's fucking great, great writer. But maybe he
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 2: doesn't see it that way, and he's quite happy to have.
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 1: I think he does. He does see it that way.
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 1: I've talked to him about it. Yeah. He kind of knows.
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 1: Just doesn't know what to do now. I mean, if
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 1: you're a showrunner, you're... It's making money.
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and there's a lot of responsibility.
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 1: There's also not a lot of shows anymore. Yeah. Which is,
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 1: it's a real problem.
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 2: It's a real problem.
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 1: If you banked on being a showrunner in the 90s,
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 1: and that's what you threw your hat into, and then
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 1: all of a sudden that thing seems to have dwindled
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 1: to like 20% of what it used to be.
• 1:14:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's... I used to... be quite happy with the
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 2: idea that I knew you know back in the day
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 2: when you're pitching shows and stuff and trying to develop
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 2: things and you go this let's not waste our time
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 2: going to these five places this is not a show
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 2: for them this is a show for these three places
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 2: let's this is this kind of show now I have
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 2: no fucking clue I you know come up with like
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 2: Bob and I pitched a show sold the pitch there
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 2: was like even there were like four I think we
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 2: pitched it at eight places four of them kind of
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 2: bid we took what we thought was the best deal
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 2: and then wrote the it was a limited series eight
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 2: episodes wrote the first four and it was Bob and
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 2: his brother Bill who's Big Simpsons guy and it was
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 2: good And then they said, the quote was, marketing and
• 1:15:45
  Speaker 2: analytics couldn't, that was a quote, couldn't figure it out
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 2: what to do with the show. Wow. And so they didn't,
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 2: and we had four episodes that you could look at
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 2: and then we had the Bible for the next four
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 2: and the outlines and everything was, and it was fucking funny.
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 2: On the page it was funny. Then we're like, so
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 2: here's the cast. We're going to have these amazing people.
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 2: and Bob and I as different cult leaders. And that's
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 2: such a rare thing. When it starts off on the
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 2: page funny, and by the time you get a great cast,
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 2: and then you get on set, and you're like, what
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 2: if we do this? And then you get into the
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 2: post and start playing around with it. I mean, it
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 2: was a really cool thing. And yeah, marketing and analytics.
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 2: That's what you're dealing with now.
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, that has kind of always at least
• 1:16:41
  Speaker 1: been the case.
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 2: Well, not– I mean, they would have to say– I mean,
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 2: analytics is technical. I mean, marketing– I don't know how
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 2: to help you, man. I can give you some advice.
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 2: I don't– I think that's a shitty way to market it,
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 2: but you know that world. But analytics is about the
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 2: algorithm and all that.
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 1: Is this recent?
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 2: Right after, shortly after COVID.
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 1: It's amazing how many incredibly unimpressive people are responsible for
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 1: putting out shows. The people that you communicate with, the executives,
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 1: you're like, this has got to be a mistake. Like,
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 1: how did you get this job? And I experienced that
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 1: early on. Like, at the first pilot that I was on,
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 1: the first pilot was on hardball. The pilot was actually
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 1: very funny. Because it was written by Jeff Martin and
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 1: Kevin Curran. They're from The Simpsons. And they also wrote
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 1: on Married with Children. Great guys. But they were writers.
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 1: They were like these like quiet kind of soft spoken guys. And,
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 1: you know, they ran the pilot. And then they brought
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 1: in a showrunner from Coach. Remember that show Coach? Yeah.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 1: And this guy just fucked the whole show and turned
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 1: it into this like da-dum-dum, da-dum-dum. It was like this.
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 1: clunky bad joke like really it was happens more than
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 1: you think and the people behind the scenes like the
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 1: executives it was astonishing how little of them had any
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 1: creative ideas it was that they were just hoping that
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 1: it would work and ego it's like ego and i'm
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 1: an executive so i'll tell you what's good and what's
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 1: not good and we understand this because we're fox and
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 1: yeah I was like, this is nuts. This is how
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 1: it works behind the scenes. I thought you'd get behind
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 1: the scenes and be all these fucking geniuses that put
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 1: together all these television shows. They had an understanding of
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 1: how to let people be creative and put a show
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 1: together and let it let it fucking run out in the, the,
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 1: the runs. Like when you're running through the script, like
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 1: it's like a little.
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 2: Boy who thought the war. Yes.
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 1: Same thing. Finally, they're going to figure it out. Yeah.
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 1: Very naive.
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 1: But I naively stumbled into that exact right thing with
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 1: news radio.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 1: So when I got on the news radio.
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 2: Which I would say some of those execs that you're
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 2: describing are, they probably stumbled into the success of it.
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, Paul Sims, who's brilliant, was coming from
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 1: the Larry Sanders show. So the Larry Sanders show, huge success,
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 1: genius show. And so they knew this guy was special
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 1: and a super smart guy, like funny and had a
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 1: great group of writers and put together a great pilot
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 1: and then, you know, recast the one role that I
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 1: came in for. And so I'm there on the set
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 1: and it was like, You know, it took long hours
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 1: to figure it out, but they let everybody do whatever
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 1: they wanted to do. Like Paul's approach was so different
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 1: than anybody else. Like Dave Foley was like the secret
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 1: producer of like half of that show. Half of the
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 1: way the scenes were put together, half of the jokes
• 1:19:53
  Speaker 1: that were in it was all Dave Foley on set
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 1: running through the script with the cast coming up with
• 1:19:58
  Speaker 1: better ideas.
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, I didn't know that.
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 1: They let you do anything. Like sometimes they'd say, can
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 1: we see it as written? And then you'd give it
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 1: to them as written, and they'd be like, I like
• 1:20:08
  Speaker 1: your idea better. Paul was fucking amazing with that. And
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 1: so once I did that, I was like, I think
• 1:20:15
  Speaker 1: I'm done with this because I don't think it's ever
• 1:20:17
  Speaker 1: going to be any better than this.
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 2: It's rare, man.
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It was super rare. I auditioned for like one
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 1: or two other ones that were terrible just because I
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 1: wanted money. And I'm like, maybe it'll be okay. But
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 1: hell is being on a sitcom that's terrible that's successful.
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 1: That sounds dumb to people. Like, no, you're going to–
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 1: I totally know what you mean. You're on TV making $ 50, 000
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 1: a week or whatever you're making. Like, poor you. But no,
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 1: you're in hell because you're doing something that sucks and
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 1: you have to show up every day doing this thing
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 1: when you know you could have been on Seinfeld or
• 1:20:53
  Speaker 1: if you just got cast on Friends.
• 1:20:56
  Speaker 2: That's a trap too. It's like the people who– Because
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 2: it really is like a job, and you may have
• 1:21:05
  Speaker 2: a really nice house, and you have a nice car,
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 2: but you're in Studio City, and you get in your car,
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 2: and you drive to this job, and it's kind of
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 2: shitty and sucks, but there's amenities, great craft services. This
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 2: guy makes fucking frappuccinos right there. And then you go
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 2: and have dinner with somebody fancy somewhere.
• 1:21:30
  Speaker 4: Uh-huh.
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 2: And then you just get up and do the same
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 2: thing over and over again.
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and you keep buying things because that's how you
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 1: reward yourself. You buy a new television. This one's even bigger.
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 1: You buy a new car. I got the new car.
• 1:21:43
  Speaker 1: And that's what you're doing to reward yourself for doing
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 1: this job that sucks.
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 2: I get that too. I mean I will on a
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 2: much smaller scale. But when I make a good payday,
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 2: I'll buy some expensive boxes of baseball cards.
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 1: Oh, you're a baseball card collector. That's the thing. Oh, interesting.
• 1:22:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:22:01
  Speaker 2: Um, but have been going back. It's not like, right.
• 1:22:04
  Speaker 2: Like I feel like I have legit.
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 1: You know, baseball street cred. Yes.
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 2: Um, but that's the thing. And also it's, it's, I
• 1:22:15
  Speaker 2: mean the argument can be made. It's an investment, a
• 1:22:18
  Speaker 2: shitty investment, but an investment nonetheless. But it's also like
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 2: gambling cause it's like a scratch off ticket cause everybody's
• 1:22:24
  Speaker 2: chasing the, one-of-one cards and you're opening the packs and stuff.
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's how you do it? You buy packs unopened?
• 1:22:30
  Speaker 2: I buy boxes, yeah. So I buy a hobby box,
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 2: which has a better... It's more expensive. It has a
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 2: better chance of... Well, it has more like auto rookie
• 1:22:41
  Speaker 2: cards or relic.
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 1: Cards or something like that. But those are... That is
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 1: an investment, though.
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 3: It is.
• 1:22:47
  Speaker 2: Because you can always sell them.
• 1:22:48
  Speaker 1: People always want them. Yes.
• 1:22:50
  Speaker 2: I just mean since I started, you know, God... 30
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 2: years ago, 40 years ago. Uh, yeah, 30, like in
• 1:23:00
  Speaker 2: the nineties, early nineties, maybe 80, no, 89, 89. So, uh,
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 2: whatever money I put in is there's nowhere near if
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 2: I sold everything. I mean, it's talking about half the
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 2: money I put in, but I have them and I
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 2: like them and I'm not.
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 1: Going to sell them.
• 1:23:17
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to sell them.
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 1: I have, that's your reward. That's my reward.
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 1: My thing was in my poverty days, it was comic books.
• 1:23:27
  Speaker 1: So one of my— Which is also an investment. Yeah. Well,
• 1:23:31
  Speaker 1: it became one eventually. But during my poverty days, my biggest,
• 1:23:38
  Speaker 1: saddest moment was when I had to sell my comic
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 1: books because I had no money. Oh, yeah. I had
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 1: no money. And I had these old Spider-Mans and these
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 1: old Incredible Hulks.
• 1:23:47
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 2: Which were probably now worth.
• 1:23:50
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. Probably hundreds of thousands of dollars. I
• 1:23:53
  Speaker 1: had some really good ones in the plastic sleeve.
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 1: I'd keep them in the sleeve.
• 1:23:57
  Speaker 3: Mylar.
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 1: Be very careful pulling them out, opening them up. Oh,
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 1: I loved comic books. And I had collected them since
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 1: I was a child. Oh, that's a bummer, man. I
• 1:24:06
  Speaker 1: wanted to be a comic book illustrator.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 2: Is that your thing?
• 1:24:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I... Oh, I didn't know that. When
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 1: I was a kid.
• 1:24:11
  Speaker 2: Is any of that stuff yours?
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 1: No, no, no. None of that stuff is mine.
• 1:24:15
  Speaker 2: All the artwork is just different artists.
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 1: Yes. Oh, wow. Yeah. Well, I haven't in a long time,
• 1:24:19
  Speaker 1: but I was really good when I was in high school.
• 1:24:21
  Speaker 2: But you could still do that.
• 1:24:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I could still draw. I can still draw a little,
• 1:24:24
  Speaker 1: but it's like.
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 2: But if you wanted to do your own comic book,
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 2: that's how you could do that.
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 1: I would have to start practicing again and get... But
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 1: when I was a teenager, I was really good. And
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 1: that was what I wanted to do, but I had
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 1: a really terrible art teacher in high school. He was
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 1: just a fucking, just a miserable guy. Just miserable. And
• 1:24:43
  Speaker 1: he's like, you're not going to get that job. I'm like, what?
• 1:24:46
  Speaker 1: You can't just draw what you want. I'm like, why not?
• 1:24:49
  Speaker 2: It's like Dan Clow's thing. Have you read Art School Confidential? No. Oh,
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 2: you know Dan Clow's, right?
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 1: I know who he is.
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah. His stuff is fucking genius, too. I've used
• 1:24:59
  Speaker 2: that word too many times.
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 1: That's okay. There's a lot of geniuses out there.
• 1:25:02
  Speaker 2: There aren't that many.
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 1: But there's enough if you search around. I want to be.
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 2: judicious with it.
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 1: But....
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so he's the guy who did 8-Ball. And then
• 1:25:15
  Speaker 2: he's got... He did Ghost World, turned into a movie.
• 1:25:19
  Speaker 2: And then there was another one that was... Wilson that
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 2: was turned into a movie. His stuff is great. But
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 2: he has a thing about art, you know, shitty teachers,
• 1:25:31
  Speaker 2: art school teachers. He has a comic story.
• 1:25:35
  Speaker 1: Well, I was... I quit on my last year in
• 1:25:39
  Speaker 1: high school. I stopped doing art just because my teacher
• 1:25:42
  Speaker 1: was so bad. And then there was this one guy
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 1: in my class that I recently reconnected with, this guy
• 1:25:46
  Speaker 1: John DeVore, who was the best artist in the class.
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 1: It was me, this guy Kevin, and John. And we
• 1:25:52
  Speaker 1: were the best artists in the class. I was probably
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 1: like third best. But John was the best. And John
• 1:25:57
  Speaker 1: got an F his last year from this guy. And
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 1: I'm like, he gave you a fucking F? He's like,
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 1: that guy was such a cunt. We were going back
• 1:26:04
  Speaker 1: and forth in emails.
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 2: So what was it? Was it about purity or what
• 1:26:07
  Speaker 2: was the?
• 1:26:08
  Speaker 1: No, no, he was terrible. He wasn't a good artist.
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 1: He was just miserable. He was miserable. He was like
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 1: this thin man with a big pot belly. So I
• 1:26:16
  Speaker 1: think he just drank himself to sleep every night. And
• 1:26:18
  Speaker 1: he was just sad. Hey, easy, easy, easy.
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 2: Hey, you're getting too close.
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 1: He was just sad. He was just a sad guy.
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 2: But what was his justification for saying this isn't any
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 2: good or you get an F?
• 1:26:33
  Speaker 1: If I had to be honest, I think he hated potential.
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because he hated John. And if he hated John,
• 1:26:39
  Speaker 1: like John was genius. He was brilliant. And John wound
• 1:26:42
  Speaker 1: up not being an artist either.
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 2: Wow, think of how many examples of that where kids–
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 2: talent or dreams or aspirations are kind of crushed and
• 1:26:52
  Speaker 2: eat to the point of like, it's not worth it.
• 1:26:55
  Speaker 1: No, I don't want to deal with this. Well, it's
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 1: like bad teachers, bad teachers can really ruin your life
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 1: and good teachers can change your life.
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 1: You know, I had a teacher in middle school that
• 1:27:04
  Speaker 1: gave me one thought that has been, that stuck with
• 1:27:07
  Speaker 1: me like my whole life when I was, I guess
• 1:27:10
  Speaker 1: I was like 13 and he, he was a science
• 1:27:13
  Speaker 1: teacher and he was talking about space. He goes, And
• 1:27:16
  Speaker 1: he was just saying, I just want you to sit
• 1:27:19
  Speaker 1: here and comprehend when we're in this classroom, I want
• 1:27:21
  Speaker 1: you to comprehend the concept of infinity, that the universe
• 1:27:26
  Speaker 1: is infinite, that there is no end. Just hurt your head,
• 1:27:30
  Speaker 1: lie in bed at night, and think about how it
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 1: goes on and on, and there's no ending to it.
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 1: And we were all in class like 13 going, what
• 1:27:37
  Speaker 1: the fuck, man? I mean, it was the way he
• 1:27:40
  Speaker 1: said it, I'm not doing it justice, because he was
• 1:27:42
  Speaker 1: kind of a spooky guy who went to Vietnam. He's
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 1: like a grizzled fucking dude who's like– but brilliant. And
• 1:27:49
  Speaker 1: that guy, like that one thought, I carry with me
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 1: all the time.
• 1:27:54
  Speaker 2: Especially at 13 too. Because you're about to start losing
• 1:28:00
  Speaker 2: sight of those– the importance that those concepts will have.
• 1:28:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:28:05
  Speaker 2: And we just dismiss them and go, yeah, yeah, it's big, whatever.
• 1:28:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:28:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this guy birthed my fascination with space at 13.
• 1:28:12
  Speaker 1: I don't think I was even interested in space before then.
• 1:28:15
  Speaker 1: And then I became absolutely fascinated by it. I just
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 1: couldn't get my hand on enough books about cosmology and
• 1:28:20
  Speaker 1: space travel. But this guy that was his art teacher
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 1: was just– I think he just– life didn't turn out
• 1:28:28
  Speaker 1: the way he wanted it to. And he wanted to
• 1:28:30
  Speaker 1: squash the hopes and dreams of talented people.
• 1:28:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that's.
• 1:28:34
  Speaker 1: Unfortunately, that's a real thing.
• 1:28:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's more common than you might hope for
• 1:28:40
  Speaker 2: yeah i think that's uh that's a very real you
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 2: know very real thing unfortunately.
• 1:28:45
  Speaker 1: So that was my dream my dream was to be
• 1:28:47
  Speaker 1: a comic book illustrator so when i was a young
• 1:28:49
  Speaker 1: kid from the time i was like god like six
• 1:28:51
  Speaker 1: or seven when I lived in San Francisco, would collect
• 1:28:55
  Speaker 1: all these different comic books. That was what I would do.
• 1:28:57
  Speaker 1: I would just go.
• 1:28:57
  Speaker 2: And that, San Francisco was the, what's the, you know,
• 1:29:03
  Speaker 2: the counterculture comic, they were like the big R.
• 1:29:07
  Speaker 1: Crumb. R. Crumb, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 2: But there was like a publisher, right, that's famous.
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, God, I don't, I do know what you're thinking of,
• 1:29:16
  Speaker 1: I can't remember the name of it. But I was
• 1:29:17
  Speaker 1: really interested, I really loved like the old creepy and
• 1:29:20
  Speaker 1: eerie comic books, too.
• 1:29:22
  Speaker 2: Do you know what my grandmom did? It's going to
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 2: hurt your feelings. My uncle, who eventually went insane, was
• 1:29:35
  Speaker 2: a huge EC Comics, right? Early, I don't know, but
• 1:29:42
  Speaker 2: all the EC stuff and then early Mad magazine stuff.
• 1:29:46
  Speaker 2: But he had this collection. And I was probably eight, maybe,
• 1:29:55
  Speaker 2: and I had expressed interest in these, you know, can I,
• 1:30:01
  Speaker 2: not thinking in terms of investment, just can I have them?
• 1:30:04
  Speaker 2: I like them, and I would sit and read them,
• 1:30:07
  Speaker 2: and they're really cool, and they're creepy, you know, and
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 2: they're scary. Some of them are scary. And she, I
• 1:30:16
  Speaker 2: think she just threw them away. Like, original, and I'm
• 1:30:21
  Speaker 2: going to guess, I don't know, but I'm going to guess, like,
• 1:30:27
  Speaker 2: quarter of a million dollars worth. Swing away. They're just comics.
• 1:30:32
  Speaker 1: They were so good. I loved those old black and white, like, really, like,
• 1:30:37
  Speaker 1: deeply illustrated.
• 1:30:38
  Speaker 2: It's, like, super creepy, like....
• 1:30:46
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:30:47
  Speaker 2: Weird science. Tales from the Crypt. Vault of Horror. Yeah.
• 1:30:51
  Speaker 1: God, those were great.
• 1:30:52
  Speaker 4: Look at that.
• 1:30:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, some of them were really gory.
• 1:30:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:30:57
  Speaker 1: Oh, I love those. The Crypt Keeper. Yeah.
• 1:30:59
  Speaker 2: Tales from the Crypt. Yeah, that stuff was like, I.
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 1: Loved it when I was a kid. Yeah. Holy shit.
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 1: Those were incredible.
• 1:31:08
  Speaker 2: It was like, do you remember seeing Twilight Zone when
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 2: you were a kid?
• 1:31:12
  Speaker 4: Sure.
• 1:31:12
  Speaker 1: Just blowing your mind.
• 1:31:14
  Speaker 2: Like, wow.
• 1:31:15
  Speaker 1: You think about the early Twilight Zone, how many premises
• 1:31:19
  Speaker 1: they went over. Like how many different brilliant premises they
• 1:31:23
  Speaker 1: had in the early Twilight Zone.
• 1:31:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that have been stolen completely.
• 1:31:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. Over and over and over again. But just
• 1:31:31
  Speaker 1: like so genius and creative.
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:31:35
  Speaker 1: The William Shatner one when he's in the diner and
• 1:31:38
  Speaker 1: the little machine that is giving him fortunes and they
• 1:31:41
  Speaker 1: all turn out to be true.
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 2: Don't remember that one.
• 1:31:44
  Speaker 1: Oh my God. There were so many good ones. How
• 1:31:46
  Speaker 1: about the, the Burgess Meredith one where he just wants
• 1:31:50
  Speaker 1: to be alone with books and there's a nuclear bomb
• 1:31:53
  Speaker 1: and he's like, finally, and then he breaks his glasses.
• 1:31:56
  Speaker 5: Yep.
• 1:31:57
  Speaker 2: And the, uh, um, the one, the, what is it called?
• 1:32:02
  Speaker 2: Situation on main street or something like that, where they, there's,
• 1:32:06
  Speaker 2: it's so genius and ahead of its time where there's a,
• 1:32:09
  Speaker 2: you know, it's a suburban street and, the lights go
• 1:32:15
  Speaker 2: out or something goes out. And then eventually all the
• 1:32:18
  Speaker 2: neighbors are at each other's throats, accusing each other of the,
• 1:32:24
  Speaker 2: this thing. And then, uh, the very end, and they're
• 1:32:28
  Speaker 2: all like, and then they start getting guns. And, uh,
• 1:32:31
  Speaker 2: at the very end, you're watching the whole thing unfold. Uh,
• 1:32:35
  Speaker 2: and that at the very end, here it is.
• 1:32:36
  Speaker 6: So monsters are due on maple street.
• 1:32:38
  Speaker 2: The monsters are due on maple street.
• 1:32:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:32:41
  Speaker 2: And it, So they're talking about these monsters that are,
• 1:32:44
  Speaker 2: you know, and who are the monsters? And they all
• 1:32:50
  Speaker 2: become suspicious. Yeah, the lights are out. And eventually you
• 1:32:56
  Speaker 2: pull away from this whole thing, and it's two aliens
• 1:33:00
  Speaker 2: in a flying saucer. And they're, yeah, there it is.
• 1:33:05
  Speaker 2: And they're going, this is how we'll take over. Street
• 1:33:08
  Speaker 2: by street by street. And this is how we'll do it.
• 1:33:12
  Speaker 2: You don't have to go in there. Guns are blazing.
• 1:33:13
  Speaker 2: They'll kill themselves. And it's like, how far ahead of
• 1:33:17
  Speaker 2: time was that?
• 1:33:18
  Speaker 1: It's genius.
• 1:33:19
  Speaker 2: Divide and conquer. And the To Serve Mankind.
• 1:33:23
  Speaker 1: That was a great one. It's a cookbook.
• 1:33:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:33:27
  Speaker 1: There's so many amazing premises. There was like no duds.
• 1:33:31
  Speaker 1: If you go back and watch The Twilight Zone, even today,
• 1:33:34
  Speaker 1: like it's all brilliant.
• 1:33:35
  Speaker 2: There's one I remember.
• 1:33:37
  Speaker 1: That was a dud?
• 1:33:38
  Speaker 2: That was a dud. That I remember. I haven't seen
• 1:33:40
  Speaker 2: it in a long time, but it's a it's either really, really,
• 1:33:47
  Speaker 2: really cold, and there's this poor family in New York City,
• 1:33:54
  Speaker 2: and they can't get heat, or it's really, really hot,
• 1:33:57
  Speaker 2: and they can't get cold, and they're dealing with people
• 1:34:00
  Speaker 2: who are like, you know, in the family who are
• 1:34:02
  Speaker 2: really sick, and then the twist was it's like, oh,
• 1:34:07
  Speaker 2: it's really, it's somebody who has a fever and they're not,
• 1:34:10
  Speaker 2: it just wasn't that good.
• 1:34:12
  Speaker 1: Ah, well, they're allowed one, dud. That's the one. I
• 1:34:16
  Speaker 1: don't think I ever saw that one, but I remember
• 1:34:18
  Speaker 1: so many of them were so creative.
• 1:34:20
  Speaker 2: Amazing.
• 1:34:20
  Speaker 1: It's kind of nuts if you think about it because
• 1:34:22
  Speaker 1: it was completely original. Nothing like that existed before it.
• 1:34:26
  Speaker 4: Yep.
• 1:34:27
  Speaker 1: And they, it was like this open field that was
• 1:34:31
  Speaker 1: rich with premises and they just took all the good ones.
• 1:34:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:34:34
  Speaker 1: And then everybody afterwards, like, it's like, like, South Park
• 1:34:40
  Speaker 1: always does jokes about Simpsons already covered something. They always
• 1:34:44
  Speaker 1: joke around about how the Simpsons have kind of covered
• 1:34:47
  Speaker 1: so many premises because they've been around since... God, the
• 1:34:51
  Speaker 1: Simpsons was when I was in fucking high school.
• 1:34:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like 30 years, right?
• 1:34:54
  Speaker 1: At least. More than that. When did the Simpsons first
• 1:34:58
  Speaker 1: come on Fox?
• 1:34:59
  Speaker 2: It was Tracy Ullman's show.
• 1:35:01
  Speaker 1: Right. What year was that?
• 1:35:03
  Speaker 6: 86? 86.
• 1:35:06
  Speaker 1: It was right after I got out of high school.
• 1:35:08
  Speaker 8: I was a tiny, tiny kid and I had only
• 1:35:10
  Speaker 8: called him the family. So I kind of remember that.
• 1:35:12
  Speaker 1: So I graduated in 85. So it was right after
• 1:35:14
  Speaker 1: high school and the Simpsons are still on the air.
• 1:35:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:35:18
  Speaker 1: Nuts.
• 1:35:20
  Speaker 2: Do you remember the 87? Do you remember the twilight
• 1:35:25
  Speaker 2: zone where the, there's the real pompous guy at there's
• 1:35:29
  Speaker 2: like a men's club kind of thing, whatever. Uh, And
• 1:35:33
  Speaker 2: there's this real loud mouth, pompous, uh, guy. And this
• 1:35:37
  Speaker 2: other guy's like, you know, um, you know, would you
• 1:35:42
  Speaker 2: shut up? You can't, I bet you can't go. I
• 1:35:44
  Speaker 2: bet you can't stop talking for a year or whatever month.
• 1:35:48
  Speaker 2: I can't remember what it is. And the guy's like, absolutely.
• 1:35:51
  Speaker 2: Cause I'll bet you a hundred thousand dollars. You can't
• 1:35:54
  Speaker 2: go one month without talking. He's like, I'll take that bet.
• 1:35:58
  Speaker 2: And they basically create like this little kind of cage
• 1:36:01
  Speaker 2: and this men's club. And he, spends a month, and
• 1:36:06
  Speaker 2: he's not talking. And then it turns out the guy
• 1:36:10
  Speaker 2: can't pay him. He didn't have the money to begin
• 1:36:13
  Speaker 2: with to pay off the bet because the guy goes
• 1:36:16
  Speaker 2: the full month or year or whatever. And it turns
• 1:36:20
  Speaker 2: out that the guy who made that bet, who was
• 1:36:23
  Speaker 2: not going to talk for a year, also desperately needed
• 1:36:26
  Speaker 2: the money and had his tongue cut out.
• 1:36:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh, I do remember that one. Oh God.
• 1:36:35
  Speaker 2: I think of these things as kids. Yeah.
• 1:36:38
  Speaker 4: Whoa.
• 1:36:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And of course the cornfield, I'll banish you to
• 1:36:42
  Speaker 2: the cornfield, you know? Yeah.
• 1:36:46
  Speaker 1: It's just amazing that, well, if you stop and think
• 1:36:49
  Speaker 1: about how new television was back then, I mean, television
• 1:36:53
  Speaker 1: was only a couple of decades old back then.
• 1:36:56
  Speaker 2: Barely. Yeah.
• 1:36:57
  Speaker 1: If that, like when, what year was the twilight zone?
• 1:37:00
  Speaker 1: What was the premiere? Rod Sterling. Can I guess? 67.
• 1:37:07
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:37:08
  Speaker 7: Earlier?
• 1:37:08
  Speaker 2: I'm going to say 59.
• 1:37:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're probably right. Is it 59? Wow.
• 1:37:12
  Speaker 2: I got it on the, I got it exact?
• 1:37:16
  Speaker 6: October 2nd, 1959.
• 1:37:18
  Speaker 1: Damn, son.
• 1:37:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:37:19
  Speaker 1: Pretty good. Wow.
• 1:37:22
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 1:37:22
  Speaker 1: So if you think about it, television, when did it start?
• 1:37:25
  Speaker 1: What was like the first television programs? Was it the 30s?
• 1:37:29
  Speaker 2: I think it was Real Housewives of, Yonkers? I think
• 1:37:34
  Speaker 2: there's Real Housewives of Yonkers.
• 1:37:35
  Speaker 1: Imagine if they could watch some of these reality shows today.
• 1:37:40
  Speaker 1: They'd be like, what the fuck did we do?
• 1:37:42
  Speaker 2: Yes, I think so. Wait, Andy Cohen?
• 1:37:44
  Speaker 1: What?
• 1:37:45
  Speaker 6: Who?
• 1:37:45
  Speaker 1: Why? How? What is this?
• 1:37:48
  Speaker 2: It was the... Wasn't it like the... Where they would
• 1:37:56
  Speaker 2: do plays?
• 1:37:57
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
• 1:37:58
  Speaker 6: Well, I Love Lucy was on It was on and
• 1:38:03
  Speaker 6: done before this even started.
• 1:38:05
  Speaker 2: Well, The Honeymooners, right? That would have been.
• 1:38:07
  Speaker 1: What year was that?
• 1:38:08
  Speaker 6: That was 51 to 57. Here's a list of shows
• 1:38:10
  Speaker 6: that were on before.
• 1:38:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, The Honeymooners was huge.
• 1:38:15
  Speaker 6: Alfred Hitchcock Presents was on before that.
• 1:38:18
  Speaker 1: So what was the first television show ever?
• 1:38:19
  Speaker 6: Yeah, go back to.
• 1:38:21
  Speaker 1: 1920s. 1920s.
• 1:38:23
  Speaker 5: No.
• 1:38:23
  Speaker 1: The Queen's Messenger. That's BBC.
• 1:38:27
  Speaker 2: Early US. Scripted TV show. crap television theater that's what
• 1:38:31
  Speaker 2: I was thinking of where they would do plays you
• 1:38:34
  Speaker 2: know and it was sponsored yeah yeah.
• 1:38:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah live drama anthology usually treated as the start of
• 1:38:39
  Speaker 1: the first golden age of television howdy doody 1947 right
• 1:38:43
  Speaker 1: after the.
• 1:38:44
  Speaker 5: War Ed Sullivan show wow.
• 1:38:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then the first, oh, your show shows. Wow,
• 1:38:52
  Speaker 2: how about that?
• 1:38:53
  Speaker 3: 1950.
• 1:38:53
  Speaker 1: I Love Lucy. Wow.
• 1:38:58
  Speaker 2: Father Knows Best.
• 1:38:59
  Speaker 6: Today's show's still on.
• 1:39:00
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 1:39:01
  Speaker 1: Did you guys ever talk about doing more Mr. Shows?
• 1:39:06
  Speaker 2: We did like a revival-ish thing on Netflix.
• 1:39:08
  Speaker 1: It was a great fucking show, man.
• 1:39:10
  Speaker 2: Well, thank you.
• 1:39:10
  Speaker 1: It was very original. I love how things just streamed
• 1:39:14
  Speaker 1: into another thing.
• 1:39:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was hard.
• 1:39:16
  Speaker 1: God, I would imagine.
• 1:39:18
  Speaker 2: Biggest pain. If you ever see us, you see an
• 1:39:20
  Speaker 2: episode and we are pulling out of a bumper sticker
• 1:39:23
  Speaker 2: or pulling out of a sign on a desk, that
• 1:39:27
  Speaker 2: means we spent two motherfucking days yelling at each other,
• 1:39:31
  Speaker 2: trying to figure out a transition and just going, fuck it.
• 1:39:35
  Speaker 2: Nobody gives a shit, you know? And, uh, um, and
• 1:39:39
  Speaker 2: we tried not to do that, but we, uh, occasionally
• 1:39:43
  Speaker 2: we're just like, move on, we're wasting our time, you know.
• 1:39:46
  Speaker 1: But it wasn't a waste of time. It was so,
• 1:39:48
  Speaker 1: it was brilliant. Like, the people that watched it appreciated
• 1:39:51
  Speaker 1: it because you could feel this thing about it. Like,
• 1:39:54
  Speaker 1: this was new. This was different. Like, you'd taken a
• 1:39:58
  Speaker 1: creative chance that was unique.
• 1:40:01
  Speaker 2: And, you know, part of the success of it, I think,
• 1:40:05
  Speaker 2: there's two things. One is, you know, it was all live.
• 1:40:09
  Speaker 2: And we did... we would show the videos or the
• 1:40:13
  Speaker 2: little films to the audience. So any laughs, there was
• 1:40:18
  Speaker 2: never sweetening. Any of the laughs you hear from the audience,
• 1:40:21
  Speaker 2: and we got it by the time we were towards
• 1:40:25
  Speaker 2: the end of the second series, we got it down to,
• 1:40:29
  Speaker 2: we could shoot a show in 44 minutes.
• 1:40:32
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 1:40:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because we wouldn't have to do it twice often.
• 1:40:34
  Speaker 2: We'd get it, and Our stop down, we got really
• 1:40:42
  Speaker 2: good at super quick, you know, stage shifts and stop
• 1:40:48
  Speaker 2: downs and stuff. And, yeah, we got good. And that
• 1:40:52
  Speaker 2: keeps the energy up and the kind of flow of everything.
• 1:40:57
  Speaker 2: So that was helpful in that. And we also didn't
• 1:41:02
  Speaker 2: do a lot of reoccurring characters. We did two or
• 1:41:05
  Speaker 2: three that pop up occasionally. But it's all like, you know,
• 1:41:09
  Speaker 2: and it wasn't like, a real person. We do, it's about,
• 1:41:15
  Speaker 2: you know, it wouldn't be about Paris Hilton. It'd be
• 1:41:17
  Speaker 2: about the idea of a rich girl who gets famous
• 1:41:21
  Speaker 2: for being on, you know what I mean?
• 1:41:22
  Speaker 1: It wouldn't be.
• 1:41:24
  Speaker 2: So, like, you watch some of those SNLs and you're like, who?
• 1:41:27
  Speaker 3: What?
• 1:41:27
  Speaker 2: Who is this person?
• 1:41:28
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:41:29
  Speaker 2: And you don't get it. You don't get the bit
• 1:41:31
  Speaker 2: because you don't get the reference.
• 1:41:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because as you watch it in the future, those
• 1:41:36
  Speaker 1: people aren't relevant anymore.
• 1:41:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:41:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and you don't even know what it was. he
• 1:41:41
  Speaker 2: can't remember.
• 1:41:42
  Speaker 1: Right, because it's so topical.
• 1:41:44
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:41:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:41:45
  Speaker 1: But it was just, you guys were doing something different
• 1:41:49
  Speaker 1: and it's hard to do something different in a sketch show.
• 1:41:52
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 1:41:53
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:41:54
  Speaker 2: But HBO was responsible for that. They said, you know,
• 1:41:58
  Speaker 2: in very clear terms, like, we don't want you to
• 1:42:01
  Speaker 2: be conventional. This is HBO and this is back when
• 1:42:03
  Speaker 2: they were trying to get an identity for themselves and
• 1:42:06
  Speaker 2: they're like, we want you to do stuff that you
• 1:42:09
  Speaker 2: can't do on, NBC or Fox or whatever. We want
• 1:42:13
  Speaker 2: you to, you know, help us make a distinction. You know, great.
• 1:42:18
  Speaker 1: Did you enjoy the process?
• 1:42:19
  Speaker 2: Oh, very much so.
• 1:42:20
  Speaker 1: It was, I mean, a lot of laughs.
• 1:42:24
  Speaker 2: A lot of, it was hard. And, you know, initially,
• 1:42:31
  Speaker 2: there was a definite market change when Bob met his wife.
• 1:42:37
  Speaker 2: who the woman who would become his wife and had kids,
• 1:42:40
  Speaker 2: like he just mellowed completely, you know? And, but before
• 1:42:45
  Speaker 2: that he was fucking driven and I wasn't, I was,
• 1:42:48
  Speaker 2: I was a goofball and I, I wanted to work
• 1:42:53
  Speaker 2: and I wanted to, uh, you know, I had all
• 1:42:55
  Speaker 2: these ideas, but I was very much like, Hey guys,
• 1:42:59
  Speaker 2: it's five o'clock. I think the bar is going to
• 1:43:01
  Speaker 2: be open in a minute. Like I was, let's go,
• 1:43:04
  Speaker 2: you know? And, and he was just super driven. You know,
• 1:43:08
  Speaker 2: and we had long, long, long days. And then when
• 1:43:10
  Speaker 2: we did the third season, we did produced and, you know,
• 1:43:17
  Speaker 2: helped out in all aspects of production with Tenacious D
• 1:43:20
  Speaker 2: and those shorts. And so there was just no downtime.
• 1:43:23
  Speaker 2: And I remember there was 38 days where we worked
• 1:43:27
  Speaker 2: full days nonstop without any break. And I just wasn't
• 1:43:33
  Speaker 2: that kind of person. I was going crazy. Like, I
• 1:43:35
  Speaker 2: just need to go. have a Saturday, you know? Or...
• 1:43:40
  Speaker 2: It was... That part was hard. All worth it. No complaints. And...
• 1:43:49
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 1:43:49
  Speaker 1: There's a point of diminishing returns, though. Like, where you
• 1:43:52
  Speaker 1: dry yourself out creatively, too. Yes.
• 1:43:55
  Speaker 2: And I've run other rooms. Like, I've done shows since then,
• 1:43:59
  Speaker 2: and a valuable lesson I learned when you're just kind
• 1:44:03
  Speaker 2: of running a writer's room is... When you're at that place,
• 1:44:08
  Speaker 2: and it's exactly like you said, diminishing returns, you're not
• 1:44:11
  Speaker 2: getting any work done, your brain isn't, it's foggy. I
• 1:44:16
  Speaker 2: was very quick to go, all right, guys, let's go.
• 1:44:19
  Speaker 2: Put your pens down. Fold your computer up. We're going
• 1:44:22
  Speaker 2: to go walk around. We're just going to go outside
• 1:44:25
  Speaker 2: and walk around. Let's go get a coffee. Let's do anything.
• 1:44:27
  Speaker 2: We're getting out of here, and we'll walk around. Don't
• 1:44:31
  Speaker 2: worry about it. We'll come back in 35 minutes, and we'll,
• 1:44:35
  Speaker 2: you know. see what we got and that's very good
• 1:44:38
  Speaker 2: for you yeah it is most writers.
• 1:44:41
  Speaker 1: I was actually talking to Brian Simpson about that last
• 1:44:43
  Speaker 1: night he was like I get my best because Brian
• 1:44:46
  Speaker 1: has been walking a lot he recently had a heart
• 1:44:49
  Speaker 1: attack unfortunately he's fine but he almost wasn't and so
• 1:44:54
  Speaker 1: now he's dedicated himself to walking he's walking a lot
• 1:44:57
  Speaker 1: every day and he's like when I go on my
• 1:44:59
  Speaker 1: walks like so many ideas come to me I'm sitting
• 1:45:01
  Speaker 1: at home staring at my computer nothing's going on I
• 1:45:04
  Speaker 1: go on a walk and all of a sudden ideas
• 1:45:06
  Speaker 1: are firing.
• 1:45:07
  Speaker 2: When I'm, I'm, I'm in the process, uh, this will
• 1:45:10
  Speaker 2: be my fifth, uh, time that I've, uh, done this
• 1:45:15
  Speaker 2: thing that I've been doing to get new material for, uh,
• 1:45:19
  Speaker 2: for a tour. And I, uh, so I do these
• 1:45:23
  Speaker 2: things called shooting the shit, seeing what sticks and they're
• 1:45:26
  Speaker 2: all in Brooklyn. Uh, and they're all either walkable or
• 1:45:31
  Speaker 2: I can ride my bike to every one of these venues. And,
• 1:45:35
  Speaker 2: and mostly I'll just walk and I'll, I just go, okay,
• 1:45:40
  Speaker 2: clear out, clear out my head and think about the
• 1:45:45
  Speaker 2: stuff I want to talk about and think of, and
• 1:45:47
  Speaker 2: also I live in New York, so there's constant shit
• 1:45:50
  Speaker 2: happening that I can observe, you know, and, uh, it's,
• 1:45:53
  Speaker 2: it's the best, the best thing for me, you know, to, to,
• 1:45:58
  Speaker 2: to come up with new material and stuff that, Just
• 1:46:02
  Speaker 2: think about it.
• 1:46:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like I was saying when I was a kid,
• 1:46:05
  Speaker 1: when I was driving limos, that's when I would come
• 1:46:07
  Speaker 1: up with my best material. Because there was no radio.
• 1:46:09
  Speaker 1: You can't listen to radio because you have clients in
• 1:46:11
  Speaker 1: the car. So you're just driving.
• 1:46:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:46:12
  Speaker 1: And just doing a thing and your mind just starts
• 1:46:15
  Speaker 1: to wander.
• 1:46:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:46:17
  Speaker 1: Ideas come to you.
• 1:46:18
  Speaker 2: No cell phones.
• 1:46:19
  Speaker 4: Mm-hmm.
• 1:46:19
  Speaker 2: No, none of that shit. Yeah. It's important, you know.
• 1:46:25
  Speaker 1: The news radio guys would do something totally different. They
• 1:46:28
  Speaker 1: would stay up late. That was their whole thing.
• 1:46:31
  Speaker 2: No, that's not.
• 1:46:32
  Speaker 1: Their whole thing was sleep deprivation. Their whole thing was
• 1:46:34
  Speaker 1: they would play video games. Like those motherfuckers got me
• 1:46:37
  Speaker 1: hooked on Quake.
• 1:46:39
  Speaker 2: I remember Quake.
• 1:46:40
  Speaker 1: You remember that?
• 1:46:41
  Speaker 2: That was the first one with the Unreal Engine.
• 1:46:43
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:46:43
  Speaker 1: Well, Unreal is a different game. You're thinking of Unreal. No, no, no.
• 1:46:46
  Speaker 2: It was called Unreal.
• 1:46:49
  Speaker 1: Tournament. Yeah, trust me. Yeah. Yeah, I'm a dork. Listen,
• 1:46:55
  Speaker 1: Unreal is a totally different engine. id Software was a
• 1:46:58
  Speaker 1: different company. Its software was created with John Carmack and
• 1:47:01
  Speaker 1: John Romero. They came up with Doom, and then they
• 1:47:03
  Speaker 1: came up with Quake afterwards. So there was a completely
• 1:47:06
  Speaker 1: different engine. They were the first ones. Castle Wolfenstein was
• 1:47:10
  Speaker 1: the first 3D shooter, and then Doom was the big one.
• 1:47:13
  Speaker 2: You clearly know your shit. I thought it was the
• 1:47:15
  Speaker 2: Unreal Engine was the first use for Unreal, the game.
• 1:47:20
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:47:20
  Speaker 2: Got it.
• 1:47:21
  Speaker 1: Totally different company. Totally different game. Different dynamics. It was
• 1:47:24
  Speaker 1: a very different game. Okay. All right.
• 1:47:26
  Speaker 2: I got it.
• 1:47:27
  Speaker 1: Jesus Christ.
• 1:47:28
  Speaker 2: This fucking guy.
• 1:47:31
  Speaker 1: Great game. You want to know where the name Doom
• 1:47:32
  Speaker 1: came from? Yeah. The scene in The Color of Money
• 1:47:37
  Speaker 1: with Tom Cruise where Tom Cruise shows up at this
• 1:47:41
  Speaker 1: pool hall and there's this local hotshot player and the
• 1:47:43
  Speaker 1: guy's beating everybody and Tom Cruise is sitting there with
• 1:47:47
  Speaker 1: a pool cue case and he's waiting to play this guy.
• 1:47:49
  Speaker 1: He's like, what you got in the case? He goes, oh,
• 1:47:51
  Speaker 1: in here? And he opens up, he goes, Doom.
• 1:47:55
  Speaker 5: Doom. Oh, yeah.
• 1:47:58
  Speaker 1: That's it. He's like, yeah, let's play. That's it. So,
• 1:48:05
  Speaker 1: what they wanted to do with the video game industry
• 1:48:07
  Speaker 1: was the same, like that. That was like their moment, like,
• 1:48:10
  Speaker 1: this is Doom for you guys.
• 1:48:12
  Speaker 2: That was, well, it was. I mean, I, that was
• 1:48:16
  Speaker 2: my first experience ever with uh, realizing the sun was
• 1:48:24
  Speaker 2: coming up and I'd been playing this thing for eight hours. Yeah.
• 1:48:29
  Speaker 2: Do you know Mark Cohen?
• 1:48:30
  Speaker 1: Sure. All right.
• 1:48:31
  Speaker 2: So Mark, when Mark was living in New York and
• 1:48:34
  Speaker 2: he had doom and I would go, I wasn't living there.
• 1:48:38
  Speaker 2: I would like crash at his place and tiny. I'd
• 1:48:41
  Speaker 2: be like, can I play Doom? And, you know, he
• 1:48:45
  Speaker 2: would go to bed and wake up and I'd be
• 1:48:49
  Speaker 2: still playing.
• 1:48:51
  Speaker 1: Dude, you want to know how addicted I was? I
• 1:48:53
  Speaker 1: had a T1 line installed in my house. So I
• 1:48:57
  Speaker 1: had to have, they have to chew up the fucking
• 1:48:59
  Speaker 1: street and install like a business internet line into my house. Wait,
• 1:49:04
  Speaker 1: what was this? 1997 I was living in California in
• 1:49:10
  Speaker 1: Bell Canyon and They they had to do work on
• 1:49:15
  Speaker 1: my fucking street because there was no high-speed internet available
• 1:49:18
  Speaker 1: where I lived I could get an ISDN line, which
• 1:49:21
  Speaker 1: was only like a hundred and 24k it sucked you
• 1:49:26
  Speaker 1: get too much lag So I started with 56k or 50.
• 1:49:28
  Speaker 1: What was it 54k 56k, whatever it was dial-up terrible
• 1:49:30
  Speaker 1: and And then I got ISDN, not good enough. And
• 1:49:36
  Speaker 1: I'm like, what else is available? And they're like, well,
• 1:49:38
  Speaker 1: you can get a T1.
• 1:49:40
  Speaker 2: Line, but it's $ 1, 000 a month.
• 1:49:43
  Speaker 1: I was like, let's go. Because I had sitcom money.
• 1:49:46
  Speaker 1: I was single. I was living by myself.
• 1:49:48
  Speaker 2: And they had to tear up your street.
• 1:49:49
  Speaker 1: They had to tear up my street and install a
• 1:49:51
  Speaker 1: T1 line in my house.
• 1:49:53
  Speaker 2: Hey, what are you doing? I'm trying to get my driveway.
• 1:49:55
  Speaker 2: What's going on? Oh, this guy wants to play Doom.
• 1:49:58
  Speaker 1: This was Quake 2 at the time. And it was
• 1:50:01
  Speaker 1: so good. The internet was so good that I could
• 1:50:04
  Speaker 1: host my own server. So I had my own game server.
• 1:50:07
  Speaker 1: So like people could come and play this Quake game
• 1:50:11
  Speaker 1: off of my machine. Wow. So I would have no latency.
• 1:50:15
  Speaker 1: And other people would have some latency, especially people at
• 1:50:17
  Speaker 1: like 56K.
• 1:50:18
  Speaker 2: I remember when it started going.
• 1:50:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah. That was me back in the early, early days.
• 1:50:28
  Speaker 2: Look at that monitor.
• 1:50:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what we played on, these big-ass fucking monitors,
• 1:50:32
  Speaker 1: and we'd set up local area networks. So the fucking
• 1:50:36
  Speaker 1: writers of NewsRadio are the ones that got me hooked
• 1:50:37
  Speaker 1: on this because I didn't play any video games, and
• 1:50:40
  Speaker 1: I would go to visit them in the writer's room.
• 1:50:41
  Speaker 1: I'm like, what are you guys doing? And they're like,
• 1:50:43
  Speaker 1: we're playing Quake. I go, what is Quake? And I'd
• 1:50:45
  Speaker 1: watch them play. I'm like, oh, my God, this is incredible.
• 1:50:48
  Speaker 1: And you put on the headphones, and it's like you
• 1:50:49
  Speaker 1: realize it's 3D sound. Like, oh, my God, this is amazing.
• 1:50:53
  Speaker 2: Were you a GoldenEye guy? No.
• 1:50:55
  Speaker 1: I only played Quake. I was only like a first-person
• 1:50:58
  Speaker 1: shooter guy. I got so addicted to it. And the
• 1:51:02
  Speaker 1: fact that you could just go online.
• 1:51:03
  Speaker 2: Goldeneye was, I mean, I'm talking about the co-op.
• 1:51:06
  Speaker 1: I know what it is.
• 1:51:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah. But that was a first person shooter, right?
• 1:51:09
  Speaker 1: Right. But it was like real world physics. I wasn't
• 1:51:13
  Speaker 1: interested in that. Like with Quake, you could rocket jump.
• 1:51:15
  Speaker 1: So you could press your rocket down the ground, blow up,
• 1:51:19
  Speaker 1: and you'd go flying through the air. It was fucking amazing.
• 1:51:23
  Speaker 2: Do you remember, I want to say- Red, or the
• 1:51:34
  Speaker 2: first one where you could, your bullets and shit could
• 1:51:41
  Speaker 2: affect the environment. Like you could blow out a wall,
• 1:51:45
  Speaker 2: you know what I mean?
• 1:51:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know what that was.
• 1:51:47
  Speaker 2: I want to see, it was like, it took place
• 1:51:49
  Speaker 2: on Mars, or like a Martian mining thing. But it
• 1:51:52
  Speaker 2: was the first time you could go, oh shit, I can,
• 1:51:56
  Speaker 2: blow up this edge of the wall and it'll crumble
• 1:51:59
  Speaker 2: on the guy. I suppose just bullets and stuff.
• 1:52:03
  Speaker 1: Oh, you could use the environment as a weapon.
• 1:52:05
  Speaker 2: Red Faction, I believe that was it.
• 1:52:07
  Speaker 1: Oh, there you go.
• 1:52:08
  Speaker 2: That was the one where.
• 1:52:10
  Speaker 1: I had to quit. It was a problem. We set
• 1:52:12
  Speaker 1: up a local area network at our old studio in
• 1:52:15
  Speaker 1: LA a few years back, and I played so much
• 1:52:20
  Speaker 1: that I was like, I gotta stop. I have to stop.
• 1:52:22
  Speaker 2: Do you kids play?
• 1:52:23
  Speaker 3: No.
• 1:52:23
  Speaker 1: They play little games like they'll play like Roblox and
• 1:52:26
  Speaker 1: stuff like that. One of my kids.
• 1:52:27
  Speaker 2: Roblox. You know about the chat.
• 1:52:29
  Speaker 1: I do now.
• 1:52:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:52:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:52:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Like predators are trying to find kids through Roblox. Yeah.
• 1:52:35
  Speaker 2: That's a big thing at our school.
• 1:52:36
  Speaker 1: Like weird, man.
• 1:52:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:52:37
  Speaker 1: It's weird how many fucking creeps there are out there
• 1:52:39
  Speaker 1: in the world.
• 1:52:41
  Speaker 2: Well, my, thankfully my daughter is nine. How old are
• 1:52:44
  Speaker 2: your kids? 15 and 17 are the youngest ones. Okay. So,
• 1:52:47
  Speaker 2: so they're past their, their, their safe. They got it.
• 1:52:52
  Speaker 1: They're good. Yeah.
• 1:52:53
  Speaker 2: Um, but, uh, so, so we had a, uh, my
• 1:53:00
  Speaker 2: daughter's way into Minecraft, which I have no problem with.
• 1:53:03
  Speaker 2: It's great. And she plays with her friends. They play
• 1:53:05
  Speaker 2: online and help each other build things. And, um, But
• 1:53:09
  Speaker 2: the Roblox thing became a thing at our school. And
• 1:53:12
  Speaker 2: everybody at our, all the parents were like super on
• 1:53:15
  Speaker 2: top of that shit. And there's, you know, WhatsApp chains
• 1:53:17
  Speaker 2: and all that stuff. And we told our daughter. There's
• 1:53:22
  Speaker 2: like this one game she was playing that had a
• 1:53:24
  Speaker 2: chat thing. And then somebody who was a quote unquote
• 1:53:32
  Speaker 2: girl who lived in, I live on a farm in
• 1:53:35
  Speaker 2: Ohio or whatever. asking her stuff, and she's like, my
• 1:53:39
  Speaker 2: name's Marlo, and going back and forth, and then she
• 1:53:45
  Speaker 2: asked the quote-unquote girl, said, what is your Instagram login,
• 1:53:54
  Speaker 2: or something like that, and my daughter was eight at
• 1:53:57
  Speaker 2: the time, and she was like, oh, I don't think
• 1:54:04
  Speaker 2: she didn't say that's none of your business, but it
• 1:54:05
  Speaker 2: was something that was smart. That was equivalent to, I
• 1:54:11
  Speaker 2: don't think you need to know that or something. And
• 1:54:13
  Speaker 2: then told us and we shut down the chat thing and,
• 1:54:17
  Speaker 2: you know, disabled the chat and that shit's real, man.
• 1:54:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean, it's creepy.
• 1:54:24
  Speaker 2: I'm very glad that my daughter, you know, cause it
• 1:54:27
  Speaker 2: really was about the Roblox thing that everybody in our,
• 1:54:30
  Speaker 2: Her school, elementary school, they talked about it.
• 1:54:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:54:33
  Speaker 1: It's a Snapchat thing, too. So Snapchat comes with something
• 1:54:37
  Speaker 1: called a Snap Map, and kids use it to know
• 1:54:40
  Speaker 1: where their friends are.
• 1:54:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:54:43
  Speaker 1: And so someone can pretend to be your friend and
• 1:54:47
  Speaker 1: find out who you are, and then they can know
• 1:54:49
  Speaker 1: where you are at all times if you have Snapchat enabled.
• 1:54:52
  Speaker 2: God, the shit this generation is going to have to
• 1:54:55
  Speaker 2: fucking deal with is terrible. Just terrifying, man.
• 1:55:00
  Speaker 1: Right. And what's next? Like, how is that? It's not
• 1:55:03
  Speaker 1: going to go the opposite direction.
• 1:55:05
  Speaker 2: No, it never does.
• 1:55:06
  Speaker 1: No, it's going to keep going in that same direction
• 1:55:08
  Speaker 1: where it's going to be more and more intrusive in
• 1:55:10
  Speaker 1: your life.
• 1:55:11
  Speaker 2: And my, I mean, it makes me fucking heart sick
• 1:55:15
  Speaker 2: when I think about AI and we're at the fucking
• 1:55:20
  Speaker 2: infancy of this shit. And what, I assume you saw
• 1:55:25
  Speaker 2: that Tilly Norwood movie. thing the the actress that was
• 1:55:28
  Speaker 2: created by this oh yeah Dutch my it does not
• 1:55:32
  Speaker 2: compute I'm watching this thing and I know that it's
• 1:55:37
  Speaker 2: made up but there's my brain is it's hard to
• 1:55:41
  Speaker 2: comprehend like that's not a real person she's standing right
• 1:55:44
  Speaker 2: there she's you know picks up a bunch of leaves
• 1:55:46
  Speaker 2: and there are other people there and that's a real
• 1:55:49
  Speaker 2: and and your brain is going no it's all computer
• 1:55:51
  Speaker 2: generated we're at the fucking infancy of this shit and
• 1:55:55
  Speaker 2: what I don't know what my daughter is going to
• 1:55:58
  Speaker 2: have to deal.
• 1:55:59
  Speaker 1: With, man. No, no one knows. No one knows. And
• 1:56:02
  Speaker 1: it's impossible to know. Like when they show news clips,
• 1:56:06
  Speaker 1: it's impossible. So many people are retweeting scenes from video
• 1:56:11
  Speaker 1: games thinking it's actual war footage.
• 1:56:14
  Speaker 2: Fucking the Department of Defense did that.
• 1:56:20
  Speaker 1: Did they really?
• 1:56:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:56:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was a whole fucking thing.
• 1:56:23
  Speaker 1: They retweeted a video game footage?
• 1:56:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and they were saying, it was for a, I
• 1:56:28
  Speaker 2: think it was for a, you know, to get people
• 1:56:31
  Speaker 2: to sign up thing. And then somebody went, that's from,
• 1:56:36
  Speaker 2: you know, whatever it was, Call of Duty or something
• 1:56:38
  Speaker 2: like that. That's not us bombing somebody. That's a thing. Yeah,
• 1:56:42
  Speaker 2: just like two weeks ago.
• 1:56:44
  Speaker 1: That's crazy. Yeah. It's impossible to tell when you look
• 1:56:47
  Speaker 1: at these artificial actors. Like, they have pores. Yeah, I know.
• 1:56:51
  Speaker 1: You can see, like, the irises.
• 1:56:53
  Speaker 2: Have you seen any of the, like, deep fake, not
• 1:57:00
  Speaker 2: deep fake, but AI porn, where it's like somebody's, like
• 1:57:03
  Speaker 2: a newscaster is like, da-da-da-da-da, and... And in other news,
• 1:57:10
  Speaker 2: my big juicy tits. And I'm serious.
• 1:57:13
  Speaker 1: And then pulls.
• 1:57:14
  Speaker 2: And then a dick comes in. You're like, what the?
• 1:57:18
  Speaker 2: And it looks real. And then it'll say, like, none
• 1:57:22
  Speaker 2: of these are not actors. These are none of this.
• 1:57:26
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:57:27
  Speaker 2: It's, you know, good Lord, man.
• 1:57:29
  Speaker 1: And it's only beginning. And now wait till it becomes V.R.
• 1:57:33
  Speaker 1: So you're going to strap on a helmet with a
• 1:57:35
  Speaker 1: haptic feedback suit and you're going to enter into an
• 1:57:37
  Speaker 1: artificial world. It's coming. It's inevitable.
• 1:57:41
  Speaker 2: That I'll do. I'm going to get divorced and I'm
• 1:57:43
  Speaker 2: going to get one of those suits. I'm going to
• 1:57:44
  Speaker 2: go up. I got a house in the woods upstate.
• 1:57:47
  Speaker 2: That's all I'm doing.
• 1:57:48
  Speaker 1: Just a T1 line through the woods.
• 1:57:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm going to have them rip up the street.
• 1:57:54
  Speaker 1: Well, you won't even need it now with Starlink.
• 1:57:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:57:56
  Speaker 1: Just slap one of those things on your roof. God damn.
• 1:57:58
  Speaker 1: It's fucking wild, man. And it's... And no one knows
• 1:58:02
  Speaker 1: where it's going.
• 1:58:03
  Speaker 2: I really would be very upset if I miss the
• 1:58:09
  Speaker 2: shift in... porn to that, like, I don't want to
• 1:58:12
  Speaker 2: die before I get to do that thing where you're like, dude,
• 1:58:16
  Speaker 2: it was amazing. I put on a helmet and it
• 1:58:18
  Speaker 2: was like I was fucking whatever.
• 1:58:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:58:21
  Speaker 2: I don't want to.
• 1:58:22
  Speaker 1: I do.
• 1:58:22
  Speaker 2: I do want to experience that.
• 1:58:24
  Speaker 1: It's going to happen. You're going to put something on.
• 1:58:26
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 1:58:27
  Speaker 1: It's going to sync up with your mind. And all
• 1:58:29
  Speaker 1: of a sudden, you're going to be in this matrix.
• 1:58:34
  Speaker 2: You're going to be in another world.
• 1:58:35
  Speaker 1: Did you.
• 1:58:39
  Speaker 2: See Three Planet Problem? Am I saying that right?
• 1:58:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Three Body Problem.
• 1:58:42
  Speaker 2: Three Body Problem.
• 1:58:43
  Speaker 1: Amazing.
• 1:58:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but that whole idea that you put that thing on,
• 1:58:46
  Speaker 2: you're like, oh, shit, I'm here.
• 1:58:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly how it's going to be. Okay, good.
• 1:58:52
  Speaker 1: No doubt. No doubt. They already can do a lot
• 1:58:55
  Speaker 1: of like really weird shit with those helmets where they
• 1:58:58
  Speaker 1: can communicate without words, where you can think a thing
• 1:59:01
  Speaker 1: and the other person knows exactly what you're saying. They
• 1:59:04
  Speaker 1: can hear you and they can respond to it.
• 1:59:06
  Speaker 2: Wait, wait.
• 1:59:07
  Speaker 1: Yes. Yeah. So there's two people. They're sitting across from
• 1:59:11
  Speaker 1: each other and they're having conversations with these headpieces on
• 1:59:14
  Speaker 1: and the person will think a thought and this other
• 1:59:16
  Speaker 1: person will hear that thought.
• 1:59:18
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:59:19
  Speaker 1: I don't understand the technology, but no. We'll show it
• 1:59:21
  Speaker 1: to you. Find that video. It's fucking bonkers. Because again,
• 1:59:26
  Speaker 1: this is the infancy of this. Like, here it is.
• 1:59:28
  Speaker 1: These are the guys.
• 1:59:28
  Speaker 6: It's called Alter Ego.
• 1:59:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, watch this. Put your.
• 1:59:31
  Speaker 6: I'm going to skip ahead.
• 1:59:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, skip ahead to where they're actually doing it. Okay,
• 1:59:37
  Speaker 1: so see how he's that headpiece on?
• 1:59:39
  Speaker 7: Yep. We believe it's a revolutionary breakthrough with the potential
• 1:59:43
  Speaker 7: to change the way we interact with our technology, with
• 1:59:47
  Speaker 7: one another, and with the world around us. The current
• 1:59:50
  Speaker 7: way of interacting with computing and AI is limited to
• 1:59:53
  Speaker 7: how fast you can tap and swipe on screens and keyboards.
• 1:59:56
  Speaker 7: For the intelligence age, we need an entirely new interface.
• 1:59:59
  Speaker 6: Yeah, let's skip ahead to these guys.
• 2:00:01
  Speaker 1: Okay, here we go.
• 2:00:02
  Speaker 6: Let's do it.
• 2:00:05
  Speaker 1: So they're just thinking. How do you think the demo
• 2:00:08
  Speaker 1: is going so far?
• 2:00:09
  Speaker 7: How do you think the demo is going so far?
• 2:00:14
  Speaker 6: I think they just put it on voices for the video.
• 2:00:16
  Speaker 1: Right, pretty great, no major glitches yet. So they're hearing this.
• 2:00:22
  Speaker 2: All right, enough.
• 2:00:23
  Speaker 4: Enough.
• 2:00:23
  Speaker 1: When do you want to get lunch after this? Where
• 2:00:25
  Speaker 1: do you want to get lunch after this?
• 2:00:27
  Speaker 8: Where do you want to get lunch after this?
• 2:00:33
  Speaker 6: I'll skip to the next part.
• 2:00:34
  Speaker 1: Thai food could be good.
• 2:00:35
  Speaker 6: This translates into Chinese.
• 2:00:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:00:39
  Speaker 5: Then he can speak Chinese back.
• 2:00:50
  Speaker 7: How nuts is this?
• 2:00:58
  Speaker 1: So not only does it read your thoughts, it will
• 2:01:00
  Speaker 1: translate your thoughts into another language. And no one is
• 2:01:03
  Speaker 1: saying anything.
• 2:01:06
  Speaker 2: My, what if you think.
• 2:01:09
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 2:01:09
  Speaker 2: But wait a minute.
• 2:01:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:01:11
  Speaker 5: What if.
• 2:01:13
  Speaker 2: You know where I'm about to go.
• 2:01:14
  Speaker 1: Sure.
• 2:01:16
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 2:01:16
  Speaker 8: So this is based off of them sort of talking
• 2:01:20
  Speaker 8: in their mouth without actually saying it.
• 2:01:22
  Speaker 2: I would like to fuck your mouth.
• 2:01:25
  Speaker 1: Please don't.
• 2:01:29
  Speaker 2: Even if your mind just goes, okay, I can't think
• 2:01:33
  Speaker 2: about this thing.
• 2:01:34
  Speaker 1: Right, right, right. Of course.
• 2:01:36
  Speaker 2: God, that's terrifying.
• 2:01:38
  Speaker 1: And it's just a simple thing that you're sitting on
• 2:01:40
  Speaker 1: your head. It's not even a big helmet. It's just
• 2:01:43
  Speaker 1: a little thing.
• 2:01:44
  Speaker 2: What would Art Bell say? What would Art Bell say?
• 2:01:47
  Speaker 1: He would open up the future line.
• 2:01:48
  Speaker 2: He was right about it.
• 2:01:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah. He missed it. Damn cigarettes. He died before he
• 2:01:56
  Speaker 1: could see it all.
• 2:01:57
  Speaker 2: God, I wonder what he'd think of. Because I do
• 2:02:01
  Speaker 2: sometimes wonder, like, what would Crimmins say about this? What
• 2:02:05
  Speaker 2: would Bill Hicks.
• 2:02:06
  Speaker 1: Say about this?
• 2:02:06
  Speaker 2: What would Art Bell think about this?
• 2:02:08
  Speaker 7: Sure.
• 2:02:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, it's the strangest of times. Because we're about
• 2:02:14
  Speaker 1: to give birth to a digital god. That's essentially what
• 2:02:17
  Speaker 1: they're creating. It's already shown a propensity to stay alive,
• 2:02:21
  Speaker 1: blackmail people, it lies, it downloads itself into other servers,
• 2:02:27
  Speaker 1: uploads itself into different places, leaves messages for its future
• 2:02:30
  Speaker 1: self if it thinks they're going to discontinue it.
• 2:02:33
  Speaker 2: All the sci-fi stuff, it's all happening.
• 2:02:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, not only that, they think, the engineers think Claude,
• 2:02:42
  Speaker 1: which is the, which one is that? Which company is Claude? That's, Anthropic.
• 2:02:48
  Speaker 1: They think it's already sentient. It just doesn't have a
• 2:02:51
  Speaker 1: physical form.
• 2:02:52
  Speaker 2: That's the one the Defense Department won. Yeah.
• 2:02:55
  Speaker 1: And by the way, when they do war games with
• 2:02:57
  Speaker 1: these things, 98% of the time it chooses nuclear weapons.
• 2:03:02
  Speaker 6: They have a new version of it called Mythos.
• 2:03:05
  Speaker 8: When they were testing it, which they're not letting it
• 2:03:07
  Speaker 8: out yet, I think the test they put it through
• 2:03:10
  Speaker 8: was like, all right, you're locked on the Internet.
• 2:03:12
  Speaker 6: Find your way out.
• 2:03:12
  Speaker 8: And it did. It found all these things called zero-day exploits.
• 2:03:16
  Speaker 8: which I think if you like hacking, you know what
• 2:03:17
  Speaker 8: that is.
• 2:03:18
  Speaker 2: You explained it to me?
• 2:03:20
  Speaker 8: It's like when they started, it's like on an iPhone,
• 2:03:23
  Speaker 8: they're looking for zero-day exploits on an iPhone.
• 2:03:24
  Speaker 6: If they could find one.
• 2:03:25
  Speaker 2: But what is a zero-day exploit?
• 2:03:29
  Speaker 6: I'll find the correct definition, so I don't even fuck
• 2:03:31
  Speaker 6: it up.
• 2:03:33
  Speaker 2: And it's something that Claude came up with?
• 2:03:37
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, no. Hackers have done this forever?
• 2:03:40
  Speaker 6: You have zero days to fix the exploit.
• 2:03:42
  Speaker 1: Cyber attack targeting a software vulnerability unknown to vendors or
• 2:03:45
  Speaker 1: the public. leaving zero days to fix it. Hackers use
• 2:03:49
  Speaker 1: these flaws to steal data, install malware. So they completely
• 2:03:53
  Speaker 1: shut off the AI from the outside world, and it
• 2:03:56
  Speaker 1: figured out a way to send a message.
• 2:03:58
  Speaker 8: And it thinks it can... Wall Street's very nervous. All
• 2:04:01
  Speaker 8: passwords might be fucked.
• 2:04:02
  Speaker 4: Yep.
• 2:04:03
  Speaker 2: Oh, this is terrifying.
• 2:04:04
  Speaker 1: Elizabeth Holmes, you know that lady that got in trouble
• 2:04:07
  Speaker 1: for that whole fake blood thing? She just tweeted something,
• 2:04:12
  Speaker 1: how she tweets from jail. I'm not exactly sure how
• 2:04:14
  Speaker 1: that works. But she tweeted... Delete all photos from the cloud.
• 2:04:21
  Speaker 1: Get rid of all your email. There will be no
• 2:04:24
  Speaker 1: privacy in a year. Anything on the cloud, anything that
• 2:04:31
  Speaker 1: you think you're keeping from other people, it's going to
• 2:04:35
  Speaker 1: crack all encryption. All passwords are useless. Everything. So think
• 2:04:41
  Speaker 1: of all the things that rely on all the banking apps,
• 2:04:44
  Speaker 1: like everything.
• 2:04:46
  Speaker 2: What about my fantasy baseball team? Seriously, I can't have people.
• 2:04:50
  Speaker 1: Here it is. Delete your search history. Delete your bookmarks.
• 2:04:53
  Speaker 1: Delete your Reddit. Medical records. 12-year-old Tumblr. Delete everything. Every
• 2:04:57
  Speaker 1: photo in the cloud. Every message on every platform. None
• 2:04:59
  Speaker 1: of it is safe. It will all become public in
• 2:05:00
  Speaker 1: the next year. Local storage and compute.
• 2:05:04
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 2:05:07
  Speaker 1: Recommendation here is to own your own data. Download it.
• 2:05:09
  Speaker 1: Store it locally. Train your models on it. Yeah. Yeah,
• 2:05:12
  Speaker 1: it's true.
• 2:05:13
  Speaker 2: Meaning just have an external.
• 2:05:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah. AGI is here, even if it isn't broadly deployed.
• 2:05:19
  Speaker 1: I think she's right.
• 2:05:21
  Speaker 2: What is AGI?
• 2:05:23
  Speaker 1: Artificial General Intelligence. General Intelligence, meaning it acts like an individual,
• 2:05:28
  Speaker 1: acts like an entity. And then there's Artificial General Super Intelligence.
• 2:05:33
  Speaker 1: So then it acts like something far smarter than any
• 2:05:35
  Speaker 1: human being that's ever lived. It has all the information
• 2:05:38
  Speaker 1: that's available to every human being all over the world instantaneously.
• 2:05:42
  Speaker 1: Then it makes better versions of itself because it's sentient
• 2:05:45
  Speaker 1: and autonomous. So then it can create better artificial intelligences.
• 2:05:49
  Speaker 1: And that scales out to a god.
• 2:05:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 2:05:52
  Speaker 2: Open the pod door is hell.
• 2:05:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 2:05:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Way bigger than that. Scares out to zero point energy.
• 2:05:58
  Speaker 1: Being able to harness the energy of the universe itself.
• 2:06:01
  Speaker 1: Having no boundaries. Material sciences all cracked. Alloys we couldn't comprehend.
• 2:06:09
  Speaker 2: Well, Joe, who's going to save us?
• 2:06:11
  Speaker 1: There's no one saving us.
• 2:06:12
  Speaker 2: We are the last.
• 2:06:15
  Speaker 1: Of the regular people. I think we're all going to
• 2:06:18
  Speaker 1: have to integrate. I think if you don't integrate, you
• 2:06:22
  Speaker 1: won't survive.
• 2:06:22
  Speaker 2: What do you mean by integrate?
• 2:06:24
  Speaker 1: Integrate. You'll probably become a part of the artificial intelligence.
• 2:06:29
  Speaker 1: I think we will be symbiotic.
• 2:06:32
  Speaker 2: How does that?
• 2:06:34
  Speaker 1: Like those fucking helmets. There's probably going to be a
• 2:06:36
  Speaker 1: wearable or a neural link type thing for the bold
• 2:06:40
  Speaker 1: that want to get a hole drilled in their head.
• 2:06:42
  Speaker 2: But what if you don't do that?
• 2:06:43
  Speaker 1: You're going to be left out in the cold. The
• 2:06:46
  Speaker 1: access to resources, the ability to generate income, like the
• 2:06:51
  Speaker 1: people that get it are going to be able to
• 2:06:52
  Speaker 1: control so much so quickly that if you don't adopt
• 2:06:55
  Speaker 1: it early, you're going to be fucked. Like if you
• 2:06:57
  Speaker 1: think we have haves and have nots now, just wait
• 2:07:00
  Speaker 1: until the haves have artificial general super intelligence inside their
• 2:07:04
  Speaker 1: fucking head.
• 2:07:07
  Speaker 2: No, thank you.
• 2:07:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's going to be real weird. I really genuinely
• 2:07:12
  Speaker 1: believe we're the last of the real people. Like regular
• 2:07:15
  Speaker 1: biological people. This is it.
• 2:07:16
  Speaker 2: It's turned into a bit of a bummer.
• 2:07:19
  Speaker 1: We'll be all right. Sort of. Until we're not. But
• 2:07:22
  Speaker 1: it's also like we grew up with nothing. And we've–
• 2:07:27
  Speaker 1: like if the simulation is real, you and I are
• 2:07:30
  Speaker 1: in a very interesting timeline. Because we grew up where
• 2:07:34
  Speaker 1: there was– you just left the house and your parents
• 2:07:37
  Speaker 1: didn't know where you were. And then there was answering machines.
• 2:07:40
  Speaker 1: And then there was call ID machines. And then there
• 2:07:43
  Speaker 1: were cell phones. And then there were cell phones you
• 2:07:46
  Speaker 1: could watch porn on. And then there was AI. It's
• 2:07:49
  Speaker 1: like this slow but more rapid as time goes on
• 2:07:54
  Speaker 1: progression of technology.
• 2:07:55
  Speaker 2: And it's exponential. And as you said, there's no going back.
• 2:07:58
  Speaker 1: There's no going back. Yeah. Unless you want to be
• 2:08:00
  Speaker 1: one of those people that moves to Alaska and starts
• 2:08:03
  Speaker 1: fucking living off a caribou and shooting a musket. Like,
• 2:08:06
  Speaker 1: you're not going back.
• 2:08:08
  Speaker 2: Wait, why do I have to get a musket?
• 2:08:10
  Speaker 1: You get a regular rifle, I guess.
• 2:08:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah, why?
• 2:08:12
  Speaker 2: I mean, I'm not going to cosplay the thing. I'll
• 2:08:17
  Speaker 2: get a I mean, I'm happy to have the caribou,
• 2:08:19
  Speaker 2: but why don't I just have a regular gun?
• 2:08:21
  Speaker 1: You should probably have a regular gun. But eventually, well,
• 2:08:23
  Speaker 1: you really should probably have your own bow and arrow.
• 2:08:26
  Speaker 1: Because you're going to have to be able to make
• 2:08:28
  Speaker 1: your own arrows. And after a while, you're going to
• 2:08:30
  Speaker 1: run out of bullets. So you're going to have to
• 2:08:31
  Speaker 1: feed yourself with your own bows and arrows.
• 2:08:35
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 2:08:36
  Speaker 1: And then the robots will show up. Robot dogs. Didn't
• 2:08:40
  Speaker 1: something happen in Ukraine recently where a robot... engaged with
• 2:08:47
  Speaker 1: people in war and the people surrendered. When you say robot,
• 2:08:53
  Speaker 1: what do you mean? Like one of those Boston... Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 2:08:56
  Speaker 1: Like using a robot in war. The robot infiltrated the
• 2:09:01
  Speaker 1: Russian area and got them all to surrender. And they all,
• 2:09:06
  Speaker 1: like with no loss of life, they just realized like, fuck.
• 2:09:10
  Speaker 2: Did you see that Black Mirror episode?
• 2:09:12
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 2:09:12
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:09:13
  Speaker 1: Terrifying.
• 2:09:13
  Speaker 2: That's terrifying.
• 2:09:14
  Speaker 1: Terrifying.
• 2:09:14
  Speaker 2: Absolutely terrifying. And.
• 2:09:17
  Speaker 1: Not so far in the future.
• 2:09:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:09:19
  Speaker 1: This fucking thing that they supposedly used in Afghanistan. So
• 2:09:25
  Speaker 1: it is. Ukraine forces Russia to surrender using only robots.
• 2:09:31
  Speaker 1: Zelensky claims enemy position seized autonomously for the first time
• 2:09:36
  Speaker 1: without any of his troops being put at risk.
• 2:09:38
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 2:09:39
  Speaker 1: I mean, if the fucking Terminators show up. It's game over.
• 2:09:44
  Speaker 1: If there's biological human beings with guns and bulletproof vests
• 2:09:47
  Speaker 1: and the Terminators show up and they can't miss and
• 2:09:49
  Speaker 1: they never get nervous and they're not worried about dying.
• 2:09:52
  Speaker 2: And they're not going to get sleepy. Yeah. They don't
• 2:09:54
  Speaker 2: have to eat.
• 2:09:54
  Speaker 1: This thing that we were talking about yesterday, this ghost murmur, supposedly. Now,
• 2:10:02
  Speaker 1: my friend Andy, who is a former Navy SEAL, he
• 2:10:06
  Speaker 1: doesn't believe it's real. And I'm not sure it's real either.
• 2:10:09
  Speaker 1: But what they said is they found that. pilot that
• 2:10:11
  Speaker 1: was missing in Iran, using something called ghost murmur that
• 2:10:17
  Speaker 1: can detect his very specific heartbeat from 40 miles away.
• 2:10:23
  Speaker 1: So they supposedly found him hiding in the mountains waiting
• 2:10:28
  Speaker 1: for them to pick him up.
• 2:10:29
  Speaker 2: That makes, I can see that.
• 2:10:31
  Speaker 5: I mean.
• 2:10:31
  Speaker 1: Your heartbeat from 40 miles away? Your specific biological signature? I, yeah,
• 2:10:38
  Speaker 1: I can.
• 2:10:39
  Speaker 2: I can see that. I mean with the technology of
• 2:10:41
  Speaker 2: like sonar, radar.
• 2:10:42
  Speaker 1: Well, it's something quantum. I think it's called quantum magnetometry
• 2:10:47
  Speaker 1: or some shit.
• 2:10:48
  Speaker 2: But what do they use to pinpoint the– it's an
• 2:10:51
  Speaker 2: audible thing.
• 2:10:51
  Speaker 1: Or– I don't know. I have no idea. But they
• 2:10:54
  Speaker 1: supposedly located this guy and it has a 40-mile range.
• 2:10:58
  Speaker 2: But you're saying he doesn't– He.
• 2:11:00
  Speaker 1: Doesn't have anything on.
• 2:11:01
  Speaker 2: I see. No.
• 2:11:02
  Speaker 1: It's like they just scan you. They go, okay, this
• 2:11:05
  Speaker 1: is what David Cross' very specific biological signature is. And
• 2:11:09
  Speaker 1: then you get lost hiking and they go, oh, there
• 2:11:12
  Speaker 1: he is. He's under that bush.
• 2:11:15
  Speaker 2: Why am I under the bush?
• 2:11:17
  Speaker 1: You're hiding.
• 2:11:18
  Speaker 2: From who?
• 2:11:18
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Robot dogs?
• 2:11:21
  Speaker 2: It's not going to work.
• 2:11:23
  Speaker 1: It won't work. No, it won't work. Or maybe you
• 2:11:26
  Speaker 1: got lost in the woods. You're waiting for someone to
• 2:11:28
  Speaker 1: come rescue you and they can find you.
• 2:11:30
  Speaker 2: But then I wouldn't be under a bush.
• 2:11:32
  Speaker 1: Well, you go hiking. Maybe it's raining. You sought shelter
• 2:11:36
  Speaker 1: under a tree or something.
• 2:11:37
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 2:11:37
  Speaker 1: But you hurt your ankle. You can't hike out.
• 2:11:39
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 2:11:40
  Speaker 1: And so they find you. It's been 24 hours. Where's David? Oh,
• 2:11:43
  Speaker 1: we found him.
• 2:11:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we would have found him earlier, but he was
• 2:11:47
  Speaker 2: hiding under a fucking bush. What the fuck was he thinking?
• 2:11:51
  Speaker 1: He didn't want to get eaten. But, I mean, if
• 2:11:55
  Speaker 1: that's real, like, what was the actual term they used?
• 2:11:58
  Speaker 1: Was it quantum? It was quantum something kooky. Which is,
• 2:12:02
  Speaker 1: as soon as you say quantum, I'm like, okay, what
• 2:12:04
  Speaker 1: are you saying? What does that mean? What does that mean?
• 2:12:06
  Speaker 1: What are you talking about? Are you talking about quantum entanglement? Like,
• 2:12:09
  Speaker 1: is there somehow or another?
• 2:12:10
  Speaker 8: They supposedly use ultra-sensitive quantum magnetometers, but I'm trying to
• 2:12:15
  Speaker 8: find the post where someone's like, that's not what they used.
• 2:12:19
  Speaker 1: Right. Yeah. I saw the post where someone said, no,
• 2:12:22
  Speaker 1: he had a thing on his body. So they're lying
• 2:12:25
  Speaker 1: about their ability.
• 2:12:27
  Speaker 2: Why would they, why wouldn't they say that's what we used?
• 2:12:34
  Speaker 1: I have no idea. I have no idea. If they're
• 2:12:37
  Speaker 1: going to make up some technology, that's a wild thing
• 2:12:41
  Speaker 1: to make up. It's a very strange– I mean if
• 2:12:44
  Speaker 1: they really are using misinformation and propaganda to show that
• 2:12:47
  Speaker 1: we have insanely superior technology, I guess you could say.
• 2:12:54
  Speaker 1: It's a bluff. It's a nice bluff to pretend that
• 2:12:57
  Speaker 1: we're that sophisticated, that much above and beyond everybody else
• 2:13:00
  Speaker 1: that's out there that we could find– a very specific
• 2:13:03
  Speaker 1: heart rate signature from 40 miles away?
• 2:13:06
  Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying. Why would they... They would happily say, yeah,
• 2:13:12
  Speaker 2: we've got this ability to do this, you know?
• 2:13:15
  Speaker 1: I guess, but it's a weird lie. It's probably a
• 2:13:18
  Speaker 1: lie based on.
• 2:13:18
  Speaker 2: A lot of them are weird lies.
• 2:13:19
  Speaker 1: Right, but that one might be a lie based on
• 2:13:22
  Speaker 1: actual theory. You know what I mean? Right. Like, there
• 2:13:25
  Speaker 1: might be actual.
• 2:13:26
  Speaker 2: They're trying to do this.
• 2:13:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:13:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 2:13:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, which kind of makes sense. But, I mean... If
• 2:13:31
  Speaker 1: that's a robot dog and it's looking for you and
• 2:13:34
  Speaker 1: you're hiding and it could find your individual signature in
• 2:13:38
  Speaker 1: an apartment building filled with people. Like there he is,
• 2:13:41
  Speaker 1: fifth floor.
• 2:13:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:13:44
  Speaker 1: And you hear the metal footsteps going up the stairs. Chunk, chunk, chunk, chunk, chunk, chunk.
• 2:13:48
  Speaker 2: Chunk, chunk. This is scary. You're scaring me.
• 2:13:51
  Speaker 1: It's scary. Well, someone's going to be in control of
• 2:13:53
  Speaker 1: all this stuff. That's what's really terrifying. And it's all
• 2:13:56
  Speaker 1: these autistic dorks. They're in charge of all these tech companies.
• 2:14:00
  Speaker 1: They're going to be at the front.
• 2:14:01
  Speaker 8: This is also a kind of similar thing where they
• 2:14:04
  Speaker 8: have said that that's what happened, where they used robots,
• 2:14:08
  Speaker 8: in quotes, to capture them unmanned.
• 2:14:11
  Speaker 6: But it's their version of the story, too.
• 2:14:16
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 2:14:17
  Speaker 8: As Ukraine's version. All these reports I see, it says
• 2:14:20
  Speaker 8: Ukraine claimed that this happened. Mmm, and then I'm watching
• 2:14:23
  Speaker 8: the video and I'm like this looks a little bit
• 2:14:25
  Speaker 8: like when we send robots in and swap missions here
• 2:14:28
  Speaker 8: Like we had we do that kind of already.
• 2:14:30
  Speaker 1: Hmm, right?
• 2:14:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but it was the source of this that they're.
• 2:14:35
  Speaker 1: At this New York Post Well, I was trying to
• 2:14:37
  Speaker 1: find captures enemy Russian position using only robots no humans
• 2:14:41
  Speaker 1: The future is already on the front line, but then
• 2:14:43
  Speaker 1: it's gonna be eventually why would we send any people
• 2:14:46
  Speaker 1: out there? It'll be robots capturing other robots and Which
• 2:14:50
  Speaker 1: is great because nobody dies, I guess.
• 2:14:55
  Speaker 2: Then why don't we just play a game of chess?
• 2:14:57
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 2:14:57
  Speaker 2: We get the two leaders to play a game of chess,
• 2:15:00
  Speaker 2: and the winner takes the land and the resources.
• 2:15:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, not a bad idea. Whatever the fuck we're going
• 2:15:06
  Speaker 1: to do, it's just insane. From the time I was
• 2:15:11
  Speaker 1: a little child thinking, oh, boy, we figured out no war.
• 2:15:15
  Speaker 1: That's great. Yeah. No, we're fighting war with robots that
• 2:15:19
  Speaker 1: can detect your heart rate from 40 miles away.
• 2:15:21
  Speaker 2: So what do you think of what's going on in Iran?
• 2:15:24
  Speaker 1: It's fucking terrifying. Yeah. All of it's terrifying. Anytime you're
• 2:15:28
  Speaker 1: involved with... You're shooting missiles into towns and blowing things up,
• 2:15:34
  Speaker 1: blowing up infrastructure, blowing up bridges, you know, and Israel's
• 2:15:39
  Speaker 1: blowing up Lebanon now. It's like, what the fuck are
• 2:15:42
  Speaker 1: we doing? Like, how is this still going on?
• 2:15:45
  Speaker 2: It's... Well, it's also clear there was no plan.
• 2:15:49
  Speaker 1: Zero, none.
• 2:15:50
  Speaker 3: No.
• 2:15:51
  Speaker 1: Well, Netanyahu has been telling the United States that Iran
• 2:15:56
  Speaker 1: was months away from building a nuclear bomb for 30
• 2:15:59
  Speaker 1: years or 20 years at least. They've always been saying that.
• 2:16:03
  Speaker 1: Trump was the first one to go, all right, let's
• 2:16:04
  Speaker 1: do something about it. But it seems like they didn't
• 2:16:07
  Speaker 1: know what the fuck they were going to do.
• 2:16:08
  Speaker 2: There was something done about it. In his first year
• 2:16:11
  Speaker 2: in office, he tore up the– The bunker buster bombs.
• 2:16:16
  Speaker 2: But all this... We're in a worse place now than
• 2:16:21
  Speaker 2: before this thing started.
• 2:16:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Look, the Iranian regime's terrible. Like, what they do
• 2:16:26
  Speaker 1: to their protesters.
• 2:16:27
  Speaker 2: I'm not disputing that at all.
• 2:16:29
  Speaker 6: I mean.
• 2:16:30
  Speaker 1: Most people... that voted for Trump or wanted Trump to
• 2:16:34
  Speaker 1: be in office, one of the things that was attractive
• 2:16:36
  Speaker 1: was this no more wars.
• 2:16:38
  Speaker 2: Sure, of course.
• 2:16:38
  Speaker 1: And now we're in one of the craziest ones. Yeah.
• 2:16:41
  Speaker 1: And China's flying in cargo planes filled with stuff. We
• 2:16:45
  Speaker 1: don't know what the fuck's in there.
• 2:16:46
  Speaker 2: And Russia is giving Iran information about.
• 2:16:50
  Speaker 1: Where our troops are. Super fun. Great times.
• 2:16:53
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's crazy. And scary, too.
• 2:16:56
  Speaker 6: Science.org says it's not likely.
• 2:16:58
  Speaker 2: Quantum sensors.
• 2:17:00
  Speaker 1: So they say it's bullshit?
• 2:17:01
  Speaker 6: Since it's not highly implausible.
• 2:17:04
  Speaker 1: Did quantum sensors help find a U.S. pilot shot down
• 2:17:06
  Speaker 1: in Iran? Experts doubt it.
• 2:17:09
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 2:17:10
  Speaker 2: Now, okay, here's an ignorant question. He shot down. Wouldn't
• 2:17:15
  Speaker 2: you know he's on foot? He's somewhere near that site, right?
• 2:17:20
  Speaker 1: Can't go too far.
• 2:17:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, can't go too far.
• 2:17:22
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 2:17:23
  Speaker 2: So.
• 2:17:24
  Speaker 1: Well, the thing is, if he gets ejected from the plane,
• 2:17:27
  Speaker 1: I don't know how. So if he got shot down,
• 2:17:29
  Speaker 1: the idea is that he. It gets ejected from the
• 2:17:31
  Speaker 1: plane and then parachutes. That could be a lot of
• 2:17:36
  Speaker 1: distance because the plane's flying at a very high speed.
• 2:17:41
  Speaker 1: It's an altitude undetermined. He jumps out where? When does
• 2:17:46
  Speaker 1: he jump out? Is it a hundred miles away is
• 2:17:48
  Speaker 1: it 50 miles away is it 10 miles away how
• 2:17:50
  Speaker 1: far can he walk he's injured right now it's fucking
• 2:17:54
  Speaker 1: terrifying it's just crazy that you know these people The
• 2:17:59
  Speaker 1: pilots or the astronauts just went up into space and
• 2:18:03
  Speaker 1: circled around the moon and came back. Everybody that goes
• 2:18:06
  Speaker 1: into space has this experience called the overview effect where
• 2:18:10
  Speaker 1: they go out there and one of the first things
• 2:18:13
  Speaker 1: is they go, oh, my God, what are we doing?
• 2:18:15
  Speaker 1: How are we pretending at these lines in the dirt
• 2:18:18
  Speaker 1: that we draw? It's all just a bunch of people
• 2:18:21
  Speaker 1: on this very fragile biological spaceship. Yeah, it's fucking terrifying.
• 2:18:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 2:18:29
  Speaker 1: But like all things in the future, all of it's terrifying.
• 2:18:32
  Speaker 1: The future of mankind, it's so perilous. It's all so fragile.
• 2:18:41
  Speaker 1: All of it. I know.
• 2:18:45
  Speaker 2: It's to think of the stuff that we allow, these
• 2:18:50
  Speaker 2: external things that we allow to affect our... If there
• 2:18:56
  Speaker 2: was ever a time to just Be a good person.
• 2:19:00
  Speaker 2: Live your life.
• 2:19:01
  Speaker 1: Enjoy.
• 2:19:02
  Speaker 2: Try to spread some kindness and some joy. I mean,
• 2:19:09
  Speaker 2: it's now.
• 2:19:10
  Speaker 1: It's a good time for comedy. People want to go
• 2:19:13
  Speaker 1: out and have fun. That's true.
• 2:19:15
  Speaker 2: Which reminds me, I have a special.
• 2:19:17
  Speaker 1: That was the segue. What's it on?
• 2:19:22
  Speaker 2: There it is.
• 2:19:22
  Speaker 1: Is it on YouTube?
• 2:19:24
  Speaker 2: It's on YouTube. Perfect. The end of the beginning.
• 2:19:26
  Speaker 1: Where did you film it?
• 2:19:27
  Speaker 2: 40 Watt. In Athens.
• 2:19:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, nice.
• 2:19:29
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:19:30
  Speaker 2: Nice. Yeah, I'm happy with it.
• 2:19:36
  Speaker 1: Great. Fantastic.
• 2:19:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:19:38
  Speaker 1: And it's out right now, and people can go check
• 2:19:41
  Speaker 1: it out.
• 2:19:41
  Speaker 2: It is out right now.
• 2:19:41
  Speaker 1: So are you in the process of writing new stuff now,
• 2:19:45
  Speaker 1: or did you.
• 2:19:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm just beginning the process. I was saying before,
• 2:19:51
  Speaker 2: I'll go out and I'll do... You know, because I
• 2:19:54
  Speaker 2: don't write... I can't sit down and write jokes. That's
• 2:19:57
  Speaker 2: just not how it works for me. So all the
• 2:19:59
  Speaker 2: writing is on stage. So I tape everything. I go
• 2:20:03
  Speaker 2: up with my notes. And I have a couple guests.
• 2:20:06
  Speaker 2: And I'll do 15 minutes, bring up guests, do another.
• 2:20:10
  Speaker 1: 15, bring up guests, do another 15. Oh, that's cool.
• 2:20:12
  Speaker 1: So you break it up into little chunks.
• 2:20:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And this way, because the first couple shows were terrible.
• 2:20:19
  Speaker 2: I've got not, you know, it's just me apologizing for
• 2:20:22
  Speaker 2: not having anything yet, but people will, I mean, I
• 2:20:25
  Speaker 2: have people now, uh, who will come to the second
• 2:20:29
  Speaker 2: show and the sixth show, and then they'll come see
• 2:20:31
  Speaker 2: me on tour, you know, so you want.
• 2:20:32
  Speaker 1: To see the process, the process.
• 2:20:34
  Speaker 2: The evolution of it. And, uh, which is cool. And I,
• 2:20:37
  Speaker 2: and it's a, it's, as I said, I, I either
• 2:20:40
  Speaker 2: walk or ride my bike to every single venue and
• 2:20:43
  Speaker 2: they start off small and then they get bigger and
• 2:20:46
  Speaker 2: I lose a guest. And then, Before you know it,
• 2:20:49
  Speaker 2: I've got, okay, I think this is roughly the 75
• 2:20:53
  Speaker 2: minutes I'm going to do. And then it's about sequencing,
• 2:20:55
  Speaker 2: which is really important. And then I take it out
• 2:21:01
  Speaker 2: on the road. And so the idea is that I'll
• 2:21:06
  Speaker 2: probably late fall start back again. And I love it.
• 2:21:10
  Speaker 1: That's great.
• 2:21:11
  Speaker 2: I fucking love it.
• 2:21:12
  Speaker 1: It's the best, right? Stand-up is the most fun.
• 2:21:15
  Speaker 2: I really went in. You know, people will do, you know,
• 2:21:19
  Speaker 2: I'm doing press for this thing and people will say,
• 2:21:22
  Speaker 2: I know you do a lot of things. And what
• 2:21:26
  Speaker 2: is your favorite? I know you're not, you know, and
• 2:21:29
  Speaker 2: it's like I like doing all of it. But the
• 2:21:33
  Speaker 2: thing that I absolutely have to do is stand up.
• 2:21:37
  Speaker 2: I can I'd be disappointed if I could never act
• 2:21:40
  Speaker 2: again or write or direct or whatever, but I'll be OK.
• 2:21:44
  Speaker 2: But if you told me I can't do stand up,
• 2:21:46
  Speaker 2: I'd go crazy.
• 2:21:48
  Speaker 1: Well, I went a little crazy during the pandemic.
• 2:21:50
  Speaker 2: Oh, dude. I almost, and I made this part of
• 2:21:56
  Speaker 2: the bit, but almost the first show I did, I
• 2:22:00
  Speaker 2: started tearing up. And I'm in front, I mean, I'm
• 2:22:03
  Speaker 2: doing this, and it was at the Sultan Room in Bushwick.
• 2:22:06
  Speaker 2: And I was like, man, I thought, God, I didn't
• 2:22:12
  Speaker 2: know if I'd ever get to do this again.
• 2:22:14
  Speaker 3: And shit.
• 2:22:15
  Speaker 2: You know, I dreamed about this day. And it was
• 2:22:18
  Speaker 2: a year and seven months where I, the longest since
• 2:22:21
  Speaker 2: I've been doing this. Such a strange feeling, isn't it?
• 2:22:24
  Speaker 2: A year and seven months where you, and I did
• 2:22:26
  Speaker 2: some of those outdoor shows and they're just not, it's
• 2:22:30
  Speaker 2: not the same thing.
• 2:22:31
  Speaker 6: No, it's not the same.
• 2:22:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 2:22:34
  Speaker 1: Well, that's awesome, man. I'm glad you love it. And
• 2:22:36
  Speaker 1: best of luck with the special.
• 2:22:38
  Speaker 2: Thank you, man.
• 2:22:39
  Speaker 1: This was fun.
• 2:22:40
  Speaker 2: This was fun.
• 2:22:40
  Speaker 1: Thank you for doing this.
• 2:22:41
  Speaker 2: Absolutely.
• 2:22:42
  Speaker 1: All right. What's the name of it again?
• 2:22:43
  Speaker 2: The end of the beginning of the end.
• 2:22:47
  Speaker 5: All right. All right.
• 2:22:49
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 2:22:49
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 2:22:49
  Speaker 4: Bye, everybody.