Latest / RealTalkwithMikeD / Episode 67 - When Enough is Enough: Knowing when to Stop Christmas Shopping!

Transcript

Episode 67 - When Enough is Enough: Knowing when to Stop Christmas Shopping! · RealTalkwithMikeD

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Real Talk with Mike D. Alright, welcome back
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: to Real Talk with Mike D. I am the one,
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: the only, and the original Mike D. This is the
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  Speaker 1: place where we keep it real, we speak our minds,
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  Speaker 1: and we talk about the things that everybody thinks about
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: but sometimes doesn't want to admit. How is everybody doing
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: this morning? I hope you're doing great. I hope you're
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: staying warm. I hope you're staying healthy. And I hope
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: your bank account is still speaking to you because today...
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: We're talking about something that happens every single year. Something
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: that can turn the happiest time of the year into
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: the most stressful time of the year. Ladies and gentlemen,
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  Speaker 1: I'm talking about Christmas shopping. And more specifically, we're talking
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: about when enough is enough. Because let me tell you
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  Speaker 1: something about Christmas shopping. Christmas shopping will test your patience,
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  Speaker 1: test your sanity, your relationships, your credit cards, and your
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: ability to keep a smile on your face when somebody
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: tells you, oh, I forgot to tell you, we need
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: one more gift. And you're like, one more gift? Are
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: you kidding me right now? I thought we were done.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: I thought we had an agreement. I thought we were
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: all going to sit around the Christmas tree, eat some food,
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: exchange presents, and enjoy ourselves. But no. Apparently Christmas has
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: turned into an Olympic sport, and everybody's trying to win
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: a gold medal for spending the most money. And I'm
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: sitting here thinking, can we please just take a step
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: back and remember Christmas? What we're actually celebrating? Because at
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: some point, we've got to ask ourselves a serious question.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: When does Christmas shopping stop being about giving and start
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: becoming a financial hostage situation? Think about it. And let's
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: talk about just that. Because Christmas sounds like a wonderful
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: idea when you start thinking about it. You picture yourself
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: walking through the stores thinking, Christmas music playing, decorations everywhere,
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: people smiling, beautiful lights, and that wonderful holiday feeling. You
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: tell yourself, this year I'm going to get everything done early.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: I'm going to be organized. I'm going to stick to
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: my budget. I'm going to be responsible. And then reality
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: punches you right in the face. You walk into a
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: store and suddenly you're surrounded by thousands of people who
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: apparently had all the exact same idea. And the parking
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: lots look like a demolition derby. You're driving around looking
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: for a parking spot, watching somebody walk towards their car,
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: and you're thinking, please, Lord, let that person be leaving.
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  Speaker 1: Then they get to their car, they put their shopping
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  Speaker 1: bags inside, sit down, adjust their mirrors, check their phone,
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: turn on their radio, and start a 10-minute conversation with somebody.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: And you're sitting there thinking, listen, I don't want to
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: rush you, but Christmas is coming, and I have shopping
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: to do. And then you finally get inside the store.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: And what happens? The item you came for is sold out.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: Of course it is. Because the one thing you actually
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: need is nowhere to be found. But somehow there are
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: 47 different products nobody wants sitting right in front of you.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Now you're walking around the store, checking your phone, comparing prices,
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: trying to find an alternative and slowly losing your Christmas spirit.
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: And you haven't even reached the checkout line yet. That's
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: when you realize Christmas shopping isn't just shopping anymore. Christmas
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: shopping is an endurance test. And the question becomes, how
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: much are we willing to put ourselves through just to
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: make sure everybody has a present under the tree? And
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: let's not forget about money, because this is where things
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: really get real. You start the Christmas season with a budget.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: You say, I'm only spending $ 500 this year. You write
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: it down. You make a list. You calculate everything. You've
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: got a budget for your family, a budget for your friends,
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: a budget for the kids, and maybe a little something
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: for yourself. You're feeling pretty good. Then you start shopping.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: One person needs a gift that's $ 40. Another person wants
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: something that's $ 75. Then you remember your cousin, your aunt,
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: your uncle. Then your co-worker asks, are you participating in
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: the office gift exchange? And suddenly that $ 500 budget looks
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: like it got hit by a truck. And don't you
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: just love those little unexpected expenses? You buy one gift
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: and somebody says, oh, you're getting them something? I thought
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: we were exchanging gifts. Well, we weren't exchanging gifts until
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: you brought it up. Now I'm obligated to buy you
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: something because I don't want to look like the person
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: that showed up early empty-handed. And that is how it happens.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: One small purchase turns into another and another. Until your
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: original budget is nothing but a distant memory. Your bank
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: account is sitting there looking at you like, I thought
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: we talked about this. And your credit card, your credit
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: card is working overtime. That deserves a Christmas bonus. But seriously, folks,
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: this is where we have to draw the line. There
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: is nothing wrong with wanting to give people nice gifts.
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  Speaker 1: There is nothing wrong with wanting to make your family happy.
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  Speaker 1: But there's something wrong with putting yourself in a financial
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: hole just to impress people for one day. You should
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: not have to struggle financially in January just because you
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: wanted to make everybody happy in December. January bills are real.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: Rent is real. Mortgage payments are real. Car payments are real.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Groceries are real. And those bills don't care how beautiful
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: your Christmas tree looks. They don't care that you bought
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: the newest iPhone, the most expensive gaming system, or a
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: designer handbag. Those bills show up anyway. So maybe this
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: year we need to stop asking, how much can I spend?
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: And start asking, how much can I comfortably afford? But
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: those are two very different questions. And here is another
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: thing that drives me crazy about Christmas shopping. The pressure
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: to find the perfect gift. You ever have somebody on
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: your shopping list who is absolutely impossible to buy for?
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  Speaker 1: You ask them what they want and they say, oh,
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: I don't need anything. Okay, perfect. Christmas shopping is officially over. Nope.
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  Speaker 1: You can't just buy them nothing because then you feel guilty.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: So you ask again, what would you like for Christmas?
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: And they say, surprise me. Surprise you. Do you know
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: how dangerous that statement is? Because now you're expected to
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: read somebody's mind. You buy them a shirt and they
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: don't like the color. You buy them a gift card
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: and they wanted something more personal. You buy them something personal.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: And then they say, I already have one. At this point,
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: I feel like I need to hire a private investigator.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: I need someone following you around for three weeks, taking
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: notes on everything you look at, everything you mention, and
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: everything you stop to admire. And then I'll present my
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: findings like I'm working on a criminal investigation. You know?
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  Speaker 1: But here's the truth. We put so much pressure on
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: ourselves to make every gift perfect that we forget what
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: giving is supposed to mean. A gift isn't supposed to
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: be a test. It isn't supposed to determine whether you're
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: a good family member, a good friend, or a good partner.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: And it definitely shouldn't determine whether somebody loves you. A
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: thoughtful gift can be something small. It can be a
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: handwritten card. It can be a favorite snack. It can
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: be a framed photograph of a memory you shared. It
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: can be something that makes you laugh. Sometimes the most
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: meaningful gifts don't cost much money at all. And sometimes
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: the best gifts you can give someone is your time,
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  Speaker 1: your attention, your presence, your willingness to sit down, put
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: your phone away, and just listen. Listen to them. Because
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: let's face it, you can spend $ 300 on somebody and
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: still not give them what they really need. You can
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: spend $ 10 on something thoughtful, That means the world to them.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: The price tag doesn't determine the value of the love
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: behind it. Now, I want to talk about something else
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  Speaker 1: that drives me crazy. The people who seem to believe
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: Christmas is a competition. You know what I'm talking about.
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  Speaker 1: You buy somebody a nice gift and suddenly somebody else
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: has to buy a bigger one. You get your kid
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: a new video game system and somebody else gets them
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: the deluxe version with every accessory known to mankind. You
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: buy your spouse a nice watch and somebody else buys
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: your spouse a watch that probably costs more than your
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: first car. And now you're standing there thinking, well, I
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: guess my gift looks like it came out of a
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: cereal box. Why do we do this to ourselves? Why
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: do we feel like we have to compete with each other?
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  Speaker 1: over Christmas gifts? Why do we have to compete with
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  Speaker 1: each other over people's spending? And believe it or not,
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: social media certainly doesn't help. You open your phone and
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: suddenly everybody is posting pictures of enormous Christmas trees surrounded
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: by mountains of presents. There are luxury gifts, expensive vacations,
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: designer clothes, and kids standing in front of enough presents
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: to supply an entire toy store. And you're sitting on
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: your couch with a cup of coffee looking at your
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: own Christmas list thinking, am I doing enough? Well, let
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: me tell you something. You don't have to compete with me.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: somebody else's Christmas. You don't know their financial situation. You
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: don't know whether those gifts were purchased over several months,
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: whether they're affordable, or whether somebody is putting expenses on
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: a credit card that they can't comfortably repay. And if
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: they can't, afford everything, then that's our problem. You can
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: only get what you can afford. Your Christmas doesn't have
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: to look like somebody else's Christmas. Your family doesn't need
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: the most expensive presents in the neighborhood. Your house doesn't
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: need to look like a magazine cover and your holiday
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: celebration doesn't need to impress strangers on the internet. Because
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: those people aren't going to be sitting beside you when
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: your credit card bill comes due. They're not going to
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: be helping you pay your rent. They're not going to
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: be helping you make your car payment. And they're certainly
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: not going to be handing you money because you spent
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  Speaker 1: too much trying to keep up with them. So stop comparing,
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: stop competing, and stop allowing other people's shopping habits to
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: determine your own. You know what would be a great
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: Christmas gift? Peace of mind. And peace of mind doesn't
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: come from trying to outspend everybody else. Ladies and gentlemen,
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  Speaker 1: that is going to do it for today's episode. I
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  Speaker 1: greatly appreciate you being here. I appreciate you listening. I
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  Speaker 1: hope you all have a great rest of your week.
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: And just be mindful Christmas shopping this year. Until the
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: next episode, have a great day.