Latest / The Hypnotist / Hypnosis to Liberate the Slave of Judgement and Disapproval

Transcript

Hypnosis to Liberate the Slave of Judgement and Disapproval · The Hypnotist

• 0:05
  Welcome to The Hypnotist, the show that gives you inside
• 0:09
  access to cutting edge hypnosis with real clients facing
• 0:12
  genuine. Issues.
• 0:13
  Brought to you by The Hypnotherapist, Demanded by
• 0:16
  celebrities, CEOs and even royalty, Adam Cox.
• 0:20
  These recordings took place live from Adam Smith in London's
• 0:24
  world famous Harley Street. So get yourself comfortable and
• 0:31
  enjoy today's episode of The Hypnotist.
• 0:39
  Hi, it's Adam here now. Do you ever feel that there's
• 0:43
  certain things that you're not allowed to do or feel partly
• 0:47
  because of the judgement of other people or that it could
• 0:50
  bring shame on you or the people that you love?
• 0:55
  If so, you might get some real value from this session because
• 0:57
  I was working with a client that shame and disapproval and the
• 1:01
  fear of judgement of others. Was used.
• 1:04
  As a coercive tool when they were very young, that actually,
• 1:09
  if they didn't get certain grades in school, they would
• 1:12
  embarrass the family. If they didn't do certain
• 1:15
  things, they would bring shame. So they had to deal with that a
• 1:18
  lot. And what it means is a lot of
• 1:20
  people that have so much, so much value placed on judgement,
• 1:24
  they end up being people pleasers.
• 1:26
  They end up doing things for other people that aren't right
• 1:28
  for themself, and quite often they can become martyrs.
• 1:31
  They sacrifice their own needs for the needs of other people.
• 1:36
  Now, this is all about the essence of being freed from the
• 1:40
  slave and the slavery of shame and judgement, because these
• 1:46
  things are used to control. And if you think about slavery
• 1:50
  as a metaphor, slaves didn't get to make their own choices.
• 1:54
  They got to do the very thing that their owner forced them to
• 1:58
  do, and they were punished quite often in very brutal, harsh
• 2:01
  ways. And it would be good if slavery
• 2:05
  was resigned to history. It isn't slavery.
• 2:08
  And there's lots of modern slavery and human trafficking
• 2:11
  taking place right now in modern society.
• 2:14
  So most people would agree slavery is a horrible, brutal
• 2:19
  thing. But if you look at the essence
• 2:21
  of slavery, it is a lack of autonomy and control.
• 2:25
  And what does it mean to be truly free is to actually do
• 2:28
  things because you want to do things, even if other people
• 2:32
  don't like that. That's the key thing.
• 2:35
  And if you give too much power to what other people may think,
• 2:39
  then you're voluntarily choosing to operate the similar, not
• 2:44
  slavery itself, but a similar psychological structure to
• 2:47
  slavery. So there's quite emotive
• 2:49
  language used in this deliberately because it's a
• 2:53
  pattern interrupt. Nobody wants to be a slave and
• 2:56
  nobody wants to be confined or forced or coerced into certain
• 3:00
  things. So it's quite a liberating,
• 3:03
  empowering session when you look at the inverse of psychological
• 3:07
  slavery. So I'd encourage you to think
• 3:11
  where in your life are you holding back because you're
• 3:14
  worried about what other people may think or how you may be
• 3:18
  judged? And if it's in accordance with
• 3:21
  your values and you really want to do that thing, then
• 3:25
  liberating from that is an important thing.
• 3:27
  And I remember holding back years before starting a podcast,
• 3:31
  in years before becoming a hypnotherapist because I was
• 3:34
  worried about the judgement of other people.
• 3:36
  But it's something I wanted to do, and therefore I did it.
• 3:39
  And what you tend to find is that people just adjust their
• 3:41
  opinions. They're like, oh, OK, Adam does
• 3:44
  that. You know, it might not be what
• 3:45
  they would choose to do. Most people wouldn't choose to
• 3:47
  have a hypnosis podcast or be a hypnotherapist.
• 3:50
  But I chose to do it because it connected with my value system
• 3:53
  and my interests. And likewise, there will be
• 3:56
  something for you, something you're really into, other people
• 4:01
  don't quite get. Who cares?
• 4:03
  You do what's right for you as long as it doesn't hurt or harm
• 4:06
  other people. You do the thing that gives you
• 4:08
  joy and gives you fulfilment. And other people's judgement are
• 4:12
  none of your business in the same way that your choices are
• 4:15
  none of their business. So hopefully you find this quite
• 4:18
  a liberating or empowering session.
• 4:21
  But get that clarity first. What is the thing that you're
• 4:24
  holding back from doing? And this session was created for
• 4:28
  a particular client. Some of their things won't be
• 4:30
  your things. So if you do like the idea of a
• 4:34
  bespoke session working with me, there is a suitability test that
• 4:38
  takes about 60 seconds. And there is also a webinar that
• 4:41
  I've recorded that explains the whole process of working with
• 4:44
  me. So check those out.
• 4:46
  They're going to be in the description in the More
• 4:48
  Information section of this episode.
• 4:51
  For now, though, find a quiet, comfortable place where you
• 4:53
  won't be distracted or disturbed.
• 4:56
  Relax and enjoy the session. Take a deep breath in and as you
• 5:28
  breathe in, breathe in a feeling of pure resourcefulness and as
• 5:34
  you exhale, allow a sense of release, releasing any tension,
• 5:41
  any stress, any worries. Breathing in that feeling of
• 5:47
  relaxation and just allowing that outward breath to continue.
• 5:58
  Make it longer. Breathing out maybe twice as
• 6:03
  long as you breathe in. Just a sense of letting go.
• 6:12
  But what if you were letting go not just of any tension that
• 6:17
  you're feeling right now? What if you were letting go of
• 6:25
  old stories, beliefs, and rules that were built in childhood
• 6:35
  that simply don't work for you anymore?
• 6:42
  Breathing in that empowered, resourceful relaxation and just
• 6:48
  letting go of any need to be dependent on approval.
• 7:01
  Dependency is a strange thing. If you need something, it can be
• 7:09
  used against you. It can be a chain, a rope that
• 7:15
  confines rather than liberates. Shame has been used to control
• 7:29
  from the very early days of civilizations.
• 7:35
  How do you get someone to not do something?
• 7:40
  Tell them that it would bring shame.
• 7:46
  Make them care what other people think.
• 7:52
  But what if a wonderful life is on the other side of that false
• 8:01
  fence? So many never truly live their
• 8:08
  lives worried about what strangers might say, might
• 8:13
  think. What if I do something and it
• 8:17
  doesn't work out? But what if you're OK with that?
• 8:25
  What if you're OK with someone having an opinion about how you
• 8:30
  live your life and they're entitled to it in the same way
• 8:37
  that you can have an opinion about theirs?
• 8:44
  I want you to imagine a child growing up in a house where they
• 8:53
  were punished whenever they tried to do anything they wanted
• 8:58
  to do, but they were rewarded whenever that child did
• 9:06
  something that their parents wanted them to do.
• 9:11
  That child was threatened with shame and embarrassment.
• 9:18
  Maybe that child was physically punished if they didn't play by
• 9:22
  the rules. And just imagine that child
• 9:28
  becomes an adult and still follows all of those same rules.
• 9:37
  They make decisions based on what makes other people happy,
• 9:45
  what creates value for other people.
• 9:49
  That child dare not pursue their own passions and thoughts in
• 9:56
  case other people may not like it.
• 10:03
  And as you think about that child and that life, ask
• 10:09
  yourself the question, whose life are they living?
• 10:19
  I want you to get a sense then, if someone is living a life
• 10:27
  based on someone else's values, they are either a slave or a
• 10:34
  martyr. I want you to imagine a
• 10:39
  different child born at some point in history and because
• 10:46
  they were a child of a slave, they became the property of the
• 10:53
  slave owner. The slave owner wasn't
• 10:58
  interested in what that child, that human wanted.
• 11:05
  The slave owner had a clear idea of what they wanted and that
• 11:14
  slave had to do that or they were punished emotionally,
• 11:21
  physically, psychologically. Throughout history there have
• 11:29
  been slaves that were born and died and didn't get to live life
• 11:36
  at all based on what they valued, only what their owner
• 11:42
  valued. And then think of the martyr,
• 11:48
  the people pleaser and person that puts the needs of other
• 11:55
  people ahead of their own. Imagine they were rewarded as a
• 12:03
  child. They were told that they were
• 12:07
  generous and kind and thoughtful.
• 12:12
  They were given lots of validation and approval and
• 12:15
  love. But it was conditional love.
• 12:21
  Whenever that child did something just for their own
• 12:24
  interests, they were called selfish, inconsiderate,
• 12:33
  disrespectful, ungrateful. Why?
• 12:40
  Because other people benefited, and maybe that child became an
• 12:45
  adult and started building an identity of being kind and
• 12:51
  generous and thoughtful. And that's fine.
• 12:58
  But not if they never meet their own needs, their own values.
• 13:20
  True, true generosity is having an abundance of what your own
• 13:27
  values are and choosing to be kind and generous and thoughtful
• 13:35
  for others. But if your life gets worse, to
• 13:42
  make other lives better, that is not generosity.
• 13:48
  That is weakness. That is voluntary exploitation.
• 13:55
  And I want you to get a sense that you are no slave and you
• 14:06
  are no martyr. You get to choose how to live
• 14:13
  your life in accordance with your values, your desires, and
• 14:21
  no one's else's. And I want you to imagine a
• 14:30
  version of you a year from now that is completely liberated
• 14:40
  from any concern of disapproval or judgement of others.
• 14:50
  Imagine that version of you up in the mountains on a trek,
• 14:58
  walking solo, confidently smiling, connected with nature,
• 15:05
  connected with yourself. That version of you is living
• 15:12
  life on your terms, and I want you to imagine that some other
• 15:24
  people didn't think it was a good idea, but that version of
• 15:29
  you went anyway. Some people thought it was
• 15:36
  selfish, inconsiderate. Someone thought that you should
• 15:42
  be spending your time somewhere else, but that future version of
• 15:47
  you did it anyway. Not because it's selfish, but
• 15:55
  because that is your prerogative.
• 16:05
  The choice. Choice to live life in
• 16:10
  accordance with your values. To fill your cup till it's
• 16:18
  overflowing with wonderful emotions, accomplishment,
• 16:23
  wisdom, connection, self love. And when you have an abundance
• 16:32
  of your own needs being met, it's true generosity To then
• 16:43
  offer to help others. When you choose it, it's
• 16:50
  empowering. If you feel obligated, it isn't.
• 16:58
  And I want you to see that future version of you where
• 17:04
  you're walking in that rhythm, where you're in a trance state,
• 17:09
  where you're lost in your own imagination and still more than
• 17:13
  able to walk in that steady rhythm.
• 17:17
  Imagine floating into that future version of you, maybe on
• 17:24
  a hillside, on a mountain, trekking on a trail.
• 17:30
  Maybe there's valleys and lakes, incredible scenery, and I want
• 17:38
  you to feel that just because you chose this doesn't mean
• 17:45
  you're obligated to it. True alignment is giving
• 17:53
  yourself permission to make mistakes, to fail, to make a
• 18:02
  decision and re evaluate it, to do something in a moment of time
• 18:08
  that makes sense and then decide to do something else when it no
• 18:15
  longer makes sense. I want you to feel that feeling
• 18:21
  of lightness, empowerment, agency, a deep feeling that you
• 18:30
  live life on your terms. If you want to travel, you can
• 18:36
  travel. You get bored of travelling, you
• 18:40
  can return. You want to start a project?
• 18:45
  Start it. You no longer want to continue
• 18:48
  with that project? End it.
• 18:53
  A relationship feels good. A friendship feels wonderful.
• 18:58
  Continue it. If things change, you have a
• 19:04
  desire to mend it, not end it. But if things can't get to a
• 19:10
  level that feel like you would choose that very thing today,
• 19:21
  you give yourself permission to make a new decision.
• 19:28
  Life will give you experiences. Experiences will give you
• 19:35
  emotions, and emotions will give you clues.
• 19:41
  If something feels empowering, fulfilling, exciting, keep doing
• 19:48
  it. If things feel like a chore,
• 19:55
  like an obligation, like there is some responsibility forcing
• 20:02
  you, you are free to re evaluate.
• 20:11
  That's what empowerment is. That's what agency is.
• 20:19
  You don't get to make a decision once and be beholden to that
• 20:24
  decision forever. You can make a decision,
• 20:29
  experiences the consequences of that decision and if you like
• 20:35
  the feelings, recommit to that decision.
• 20:42
  And if you don't make a new decision.
• 20:48
  Each decision gives you feedback.
• 20:52
  Feedback either validates your decision or contradicts it.
• 20:59
  If it contradicts it, you re evaluate and make a new
• 21:04
  decision. Each iteration has the ability
• 21:11
  to give you a wonderful journey where you keep what's good and
• 21:16
  change what isn't. And if other people disagree,
• 21:21
  disapprove, or judge, that's fine.
• 21:27
  You can also judge them for not being true to themselves and not
• 21:36
  having the courage to live a real life.
• 21:42
  So many people are on the sidelines, watching other people
• 21:45
  play, quick to judge but terrified to play themselves.
• 21:54
  Feel like you are unlocking whatever block or lock or
• 22:02
  restriction has been impeding. Feel a wonderful feeling of
• 22:09
  liberation. The only permission you need to
• 22:16
  live life on your terms is your own.
• 22:23
  And if you're willing to give yourself that permission, then
• 22:29
  let me know by nodding your head.
• 22:32
  That's it. You are the giver and the
• 22:37
  receiver of that permission. And give yourself permission to
• 22:46
  change, to refine, to adapt, to reconsider whenever.
• 22:55
  You choose. By asking yourself the question,
• 23:04
  knowing everything that I now know, would I choose to do what
• 23:10
  I'm doing now? If the answer is yes, you have
• 23:17
  validated the decision, and if the answer is no, you either
• 23:26
  change it, end it, or adapt it. If your unconscious agrees that
• 23:37
  you have full permission to live fully in accordance with how you
• 23:44
  want to live and adjust it as necessary, let me know about
• 23:48
  nodding your head. That's it.
• 23:53
  And just imagine what it would feel like to get right at the
• 23:59
  very end. Very long track and trail.
• 24:05
  And how would it feel if you were the only one in the world
• 24:10
  that knew that you did that? If you'd still feel proud,
• 24:18
  accomplished, and not a single other person knew, then you know
• 24:27
  this was for you and no one else.
• 24:32
  And as you hold that thought, it's time to return taking that
• 24:37
  feeling of liberation with you. So take a deep breath in through
• 24:42
  your nose and out through your nose and wiggle your fingers and
• 24:48
  wiggle your toes. Connect and calibrate into the
• 24:50
  here and the now as I count from 1:00 to 10:00 to awaken the
• 24:58
  liberated, empowered, immune to judgement version of you
• 25:06
  starting to count. 123 Waking up. 456 More alert 7-8 Open your
• 25:15
  eyes. Open your eyes. 910 Wide awake,
• 25:19
  wide awake, wide awake. Thank you so much for joining me
• 25:32
  on today's episode of The Hypnotist.
• 25:34
  If you've enjoyed this episode or got some value from it,
• 25:38
  please give it a five star rating and review.
• 25:42
  And maybe you know someone that would also benefit from this
• 25:45
  particular episode, in which case share the episode with them
• 25:49
  so they can also get the benefit too.
• 25:52
  And if you would like to listen to this episode where it's just
• 25:56
  the hypnosis, so no intro, no outro, no explanation, just the
• 26:01
  hypnosis and completely ad free, there will be a link in the
• 26:05
  description where you can subscribe at a very low cost and
• 26:09
  only get access to the hypnosis O if that's of interest, please
• 26:13
  check that out. Thank you again for being a
• 26:17
  regular listener of The Hypnotist and I'll see you again
• 26:20
  soon for more.