Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #204 So We're Giving Advice Now

Transcript

#204 So We're Giving Advice Now · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Matt quick question for you, hit before we get going
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: vacation care for you guys.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Have you ever had a bike and scooter day?
• 0:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, we have a bike and scooty day.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: They're setting themselves up for carnage.
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: When we have them, We're always like put pants on,
• 0:17
  Speaker 3: no dresses, knee pads first taken, let's go shaming through
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: the band aids.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: On that day, Mate, I walked in to pick Oscar
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: up and it was like a war zone. It was
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: like a war zone day.
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: It was like behind enemy line on Maha Beach. It's
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: like I come and no.
• 0:33
  Speaker 3: It was a dunkirk, zepping over limbs. There was the
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: kids just like bellowing in the corner.
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: And I looked at Oscar and I was like, what happened?
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: He was like someone run over, missing fingers. Welcome back
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: to two Gutting Dad Dying Matty J and I'm Ash
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: And this is a podcast all about parenting. It is
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: the good, it is the.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: Bad and the relatable.
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: And look, I feel like sometimes recently we have accidentally
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: been giving advice.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're evolving, but if it's advice that we've given,
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: we have literally learned that within the twenty four hours
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: of us regurgitating it to you.
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: So it's new year, new rules. Some advice will be given.
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: Occasionally it'll be pepper in here and there, here and
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: there when we leave it. Yeah, exactly, very good, very good.
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: Ash kids of back school kids. Back kids are back.
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: Except I feel like here in New South Wales people
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: need to be on the same page. What do you
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: mean all the schools were starting at different weeks. I
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: was at cafe and then one parent was like, what
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: fuck your kid's doing? And I was like, what do
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: you mean? They're like, my kids are at school? And
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: then I panicked and I was like, here have mine.
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: I thought maybe've got the dates wrong.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think what private schools.
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: Won't be well, I don't know.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: A minefield.
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: It is a minefield.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: Do you know who makes this decision?
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: There's someone in an office and weer going, let's confuse
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: the fuck out of everyone.
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: Next year, you start there, you start over here. I
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: actually I think I know that the school holidays over
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: the summer period are too long.
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: Oh brother, oh my god.
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: I was like, it's too fuck it. It's too long
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: for the parents, it's too long for the kids. I reckon,
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: try not drinking through it. Bro, I reckon we should
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: go back to school like mid JM.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's appropriate. I think they do it
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: so long because they're like, well, i've got a public
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: holiday in there somewhere anyway, like Australia Day.
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: We may as well stretch it out to Australia Day.
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: And then we're like and then out on one more week.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: And I saw my therapist yesterday and I was like,
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: you're not going to believe this. Fifty seven days sober.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: And she was like, over the school break too, how
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: did you do it?
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: And I was like, actually, yeah, I was like I
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: did have a few mental breakdowns across that, like.
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: Just it was pepping in everything.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: I was like, we all need to separate. It was
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: like a reality TV show.
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: Actually, I do want to talk about your therapist. Do
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: we want to talk about housekeeping? We actually the house
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: is quite clean.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: The house is cleaner there, Matt.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: I have some breaking news to kickstart the year. It's
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: been a little bit of hiatus on the breaking news.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: Actually I wasn't sure it was coming back.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: I was always confident.
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: I shot on it last time we did and it
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: was a friendly little band like you're a bit shit.
• 3:35
  Speaker 3: I still love you. I missed it last week and
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: I'm sure the listeners also missed it.
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: Well, I got it, just a quick one please, just
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: for because school's gone.
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: Back breaking news, thank you.
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: Nearly a third of kids can't use books when starting
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: school and try to swipe them like phone, so I
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: told you a lot of that one.
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: Yes, okay waite. That is it's wild watching my children
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: navigate my phone like and comparing it as well to
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: Nano who's blessed cotton socks seventy four and she's there like.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: The biggest font.
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: I've called someone accidentally. That's the part I'm so sorry.
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: Fuck anytime I've asked how to like take a photo
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: look over the phone's on fire, and she's like help me.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah. There's one good thing about it is like you
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: can get them to take photos and stuff now of you.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't need to trypot Like yesterday, Oskar helped me.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: Film a video celebrating him going back to school and
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: how relieved I am. And I was like, hey, hold
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: this some film for me.
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: On the books. Yeah, got him editing. He's a tax deductible. Immediately,
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: I feel like I put so much attention into Mary
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: pre day one of school and Laola, I'm like, the
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: teacher will figure it out.
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: Mat me someone else's problem. How is she going with it?
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: Because lord, this day two before oh, before we do that,
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: we've got to talk about the dishwasher, because that was
• 4:57
  Speaker 3: a topic which exploded amongst the dotors, because just for
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: people who may have missed it, I come from a
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: family where we believe that opening a dishwasher after it
• 5:09
  Speaker 3: started mid cycle, midsize cycle started dishwasher is it's often running.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: I will then open it if I've missed a piece
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: of color, which often happens no qualms. Yeah, Ash found
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: that out the hard way. Disbelief.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: I was in disbelief.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: I didn't know you could do that. You didn't spill
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: a drop of water. It turns out it's more common.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: I'm the uncommon one. Everyone was like, yeah, this is
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: half of the course, Like you, what are you fucking
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: worrying about?
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: But I've got an update on the dishwasher itself.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: Because I was so baffled by you doing that, I
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: went and bought a new dish washer because I'm like,
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: I'm fucking doing this washer.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: I told you this last week.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: Full disclosure. I bought the same dish.
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: Wash, the Fisher and picle.
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: I was just fishering and ge isn't it.
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: Fuck?
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: Fuck, you don't listen to me. You don't listen. This
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: is getting out of hand.
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: Point in housekeeping?
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: At what point do you start listening to me?
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: Normally?
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: Twenty minutes in you just just everything's just like wush,
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: What brand did you get?
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: There's an LG.
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: They're good.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they're good. One gripe I've got with.
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: I don't really care.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: Fuck call Yeah, you're going to regret this. Let me
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: just say that. Let me just say you're going to
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: pour your heart out of me with something. I'm going
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: to be like, I'm not really when.
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: I'm talking about the new blender that I got, Yeah.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: You're talking about when you're crying about one of your kids.
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna be like, O can.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: I've noticed with your family as you put it on
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: periodically through the day, psychotic. I don't know why you
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: do that.
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: I sloaded up.
• 6:43
  Speaker 3: Hang on, what's your dishwasher schedule?
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: I load up through the day on during the night. Yeah,
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: probably better for the environment. I'm here helping, you're here distracting.
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: I'm on it. Once it gets over, we're looking.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: At zero over. Actually I think even the government's given
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: up on net zero. So yeah, whatever.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: But it's one of those dishwashers that plays the tune
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: at the end. It keeps waking me up. It's so
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: fucking loud. How do I turn it down?
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: I don't know. There's got to be like I've got
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: the LG dryer or the washing machine. And when it finishes,
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: it's like a fucking album of like and then the
• 7:23
  Speaker 3: moment you think it's gonna stop, it's like.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: It gives you like the second verse of the national
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: anthem that no one.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: Knows, like far out, and there's gotta be a button
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: just to go, hey, I don't need that.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: Shut up. I keep thinking you'll get just get used
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: to it. It's like living under a flight path.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: You get used to it. It's not happening.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: It keeps waking up and scares the shit out of
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: me because it gives it an initial beat, like before
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: it gets into the tunet, like you know those little
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: things that you make sure you're in key, And I'm like,
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: what are your neighbors thinking?
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: I don't know yet, I haven't known.
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: But the dog Okay, Yeah, I'm just.
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: Like what the fuck? Like everyone else seems to be
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: fine with it.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: It's just it must be like my version of a
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: dog whistle, like it gets the perfect picture.
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: I'm like a sharp can we can?
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: We just like to LG love you great products.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: Wife is good, but not so much.
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: We don't they the songs that you're playing at the
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: end of every cycle, like great that you finished, don't
• 8:26
  Speaker 3: need it.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: It's a marketing ploy. I reckon.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: That's where I think.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: I mean, we're talking about it exactly, and now dozens of.
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: Hear you're like, will we take it away?
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: You'll miss us, and they'll be like, we just sold
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: like twenty five dish to say, what's going on?
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: Actually yes, Actually, Ash, I've been trying to do some research.
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: The Facebook group was flooded, flooded to go request and
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: if you want to join the Facebook group, you can't
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: just join, you have to request it. Then sits there,
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: We review it, do a thorough investigation. Once you're approved,
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: you're in.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: It takes about point zero one of a second.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm yet to deny anyone, but we had thirty
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: eight people join in like a yeah, thank you about
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: my coffee out what thirty eight people joined in the
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: window of about an hour. I don't know where they've
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: come from. I don't know what's happened. Maybe the dishwasher.
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: It's just LG employees.
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they're like, quick, guys, get on this one. I
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: don't know if someone knows the answer, if you're one
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: of those thirty eight people who joined right now, it
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: might not. Where do you come from?
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: Those people? And it's like thirty eight Really, that's a
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: big deal.
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: That's a lot for us.
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: That's thirty eight more than every other day.
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: Also joined the Facebook group.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Yes, Matt quickly, Yes, we want to stay in housekeeping
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: because you put out a new Year's resolution to the
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: world that you wanted to do something to benefit you
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: and your family, which was put your phone down. Yep.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: In between what was it again, to.
• 9:53
  Speaker 3: Put my phone down from the hours of let's say,
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: like four thirty is trying to pick the girls up
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: or I get home from picking the up to when
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: they go to bed?
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: How's that going for?
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: Really terribly? But I did have someone message me who
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: is a sailor.
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: Okay, so we'll get to the sailing one shortly. But
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: I'm concentrating on the phone because I have something.
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: To help you. Oh that's not the brick, is it.
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: I've bought you a gift.
• 10:15
  Speaker 3: Okay, okay, A.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: Lot of thought went into this. It is an air
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: lock timer.
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: So Matt, just explain what I've put in.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Front of you.
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: This is the time of lock box. It's an electric
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: time lock auto unlock function box storage tank is you
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: set up one year warranty.
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: So you put your phone in it, You set the
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: timer for how long you don't want to touch your phone,
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: and then you are phone free for that amount of time.
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: I love it. What happens if it's locked in there too,
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: and the house is on fire and I need to
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: or Nana's had to fall downstairs, often happens.
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: Everything happens for a reason. Matt, Yeah, I strong believer
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: of that. If that does happen, it was if Nana
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: was meant to fall down the stairs while the phone
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: was in the lock box, then Nana was meant to
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: fall down.
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: I do need to break into the lock box? Can
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: you break in?
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: It's bulletproof? I don't know.
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: I didn't look at it, but I thought I will
• 11:13
  Speaker 4: help you along. Youtub This a regift no, wow, that's
• 11:16
  Speaker 4: very generous. Thank you, thank you, thank you. It's an
• 11:18
  Speaker 4: Audi special bar. I was like an audio I'm like
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: last one. It's meant to be there, it is.
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: Give it a go. Yep, let me know what you think.
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: Thank you. I need that.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: And the sailor thing. We're working on that too.
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, working on that back at school, yes, back at school.
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: Maybe you'll experience this with Macy when she starts school.
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: But for Lola it was a double whammy. Her first
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: day of school was also her birthday, the second of
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: February and second ef feb so she was getting a
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: lot of attention of like, oh my gosh, it's your
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: birth happy birthday coming up, so exciting and you're starting school.
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: And Marley was like, uh, I'm here too, Well yeah,
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: what about me this, I'm the country's busking sensation.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: I'm here too.
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: She is off the top dog. Yeah, And it was
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: weird to see a sight of Maley that was extremely jealous.
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: She was like, really, no one cares that I'm starting
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: grade one. Fuck this family, fuck you. And I was like,
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: I still love you. But we had to try and
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: even it out a little bit. It's tough because you know,
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: starting school for a great one, big deal, but also
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: because she just she duck to water school was great.
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: We're like, she'll be fine. So I had to try.
• 12:30
  Speaker 3: And and when people were like, oh my god, Lolla,
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: you're starting school, I was like, sit me down. But
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: it was good. Lola was very excited.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: I think people miss they underestimate that how hard it
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: is when you've got two kids to be fair. Yeah,
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: people without kids, people with dogs for example, like and
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: you take one dog out and the other dog out,
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: and the look on that dog's face, imagine if that's
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: a child.
• 12:56
  Speaker 3: Heartbreaking. It's heartbreaking, heartbreaking to try and keep the love
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: even at all times. It's a real juggling act. That's
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: so struggle with that little bit. We left it very
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: last minute. I went on the Wednesday or the Thursday
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: before school started. On that Monday, went to the uniform shop,
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: got Lawler's uniform and I was.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: Like, you're growing it.
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: Do I get the brand new uniform or do I
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: get the second hand the second hand bag? Five bucks?
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: It's nice to have options.
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: Five bucks. What second hand bag?
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: That's pretty good? I want one.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah. But the thing is I bought the jumper the
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: hoodie right second hand six bucks bargain. I just got
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: the straight hoodie to the front and then it was
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: pretty windy day one and I gave her jumper to
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: Lola and she was like, what the fuck is this?
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: This is the jumper that we bought, and she was like,
• 13:49
  Speaker 3: I want the zip and I was like, you didn't
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: ask for the zip and she was like, ah, oh god,
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: I hate it. I'm not going and I was like, oh, okay.
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: So I was trying to deal with the meltdown over
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: the fact that we don't have a zip jumper available.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: For Lola and you don't want to, you don't want
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: to start off the school year.
• 14:07
  Speaker 3: And her little cousin had the zip jumper and so
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: she saw that and was like Chazz, little chagain. Oh no,
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: so she had the zip So that was it was
• 14:15
  Speaker 3: an ordeal, but she was very excited. Set her off
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: webs goodbye. Great day first one, all good, all good love.
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: That day two, I woke up and I was like, what.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: Is that noise she's sewing it.
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: It's weird coming from somewhere, and Laura is out the
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: door at like six p forty five, So wake up
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: and go into Lalla room and she was like, I'm
• 14:41
  Speaker 3: not going to school. Oh God, already, what's the problem here?
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: And we got she did not want to go, okay.
• 14:49
  Speaker 3: Day two just was like she was like, fuck, this
• 14:54
  Speaker 3: this is awful. I'm not going And I'm like you
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: have to go and she's like why and I'm like,
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: because I've got to go to work. You got to
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: go to school and your teacher are so excited to
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: see and she.
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: Was like, we're friends.
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: Are there?
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: It's fucking boring at home.
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah, She's like that, it's not watch TV. That's great.
• 15:10
  Speaker 3: Day one saying goodbye, it was lovely, high spirits everywhere.
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: Everyone's everyone's cheerful, kids are happy. Mom and dad a
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: little bit emotional, but he smiles on their faces. It
• 15:20
  Speaker 3: was great. Day two it's like a scene from the Titanic.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: How did I know?
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: You? You you're going to relate?
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: This is the time I just felt in my in
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: my mind for a moment, I thought, why do I
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: feel like he's going to mention the titan.
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: It was we didn't parents didn't know which classroom to
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: send their kids to because in day one they had
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: like a little like table set up, we come to
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: mark your name day two parents, which lifeboat over here?
• 15:48
  Speaker 3: Are you the red group? I'm yellow kids? Are they
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: being dragged? We're like, please do didn't know? It's clear,
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: I'm good goodbye to.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: Me, you know, all of the heart felt goodbye is
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: like the first day where it's like so proud of you.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: Now just turned it to get that fuck.
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: Off my leg, get out of here. You're on your
• 16:06
  Speaker 3: own now.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: I'm pushing him out of forty k's an hour.
• 16:09
  Speaker 3: And Lola, poor little Lola. No, it was frantic. I
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: was very tired. I lost Mahali in the whole chaos
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: of it all. I was like, there's your sister. She's like,
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I was like, fuck her, she's gone
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: leave her behind. And then I was like, who's your teacher?
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: And she's like, I don't know. And then I finally
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: found the classroom. I had to send her off, and
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: then I didn't know the protocol. I didn't know if
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: I should go in like with her. And then as
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: I went to come in with her, the teacher was like,
• 16:40
  Speaker 3: this is as far as you're allowed, and I was like,
• 16:42
  Speaker 3: and then Lola kept walking and I was being like
• 16:45
  Speaker 3: held back by the teacher and she kept walking because
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: she was just an autopilot. Another teacher grabbed her and
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: then I was like, oh, loa didn't even get a
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: good bye hug.
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: Nothing, that's it.
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: Nothing, and she was just yeah, what did she Well
• 17:08
  Speaker 3: she didn't. By the time she turned turned around to
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: look for I was gone.
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: It's a key.
• 17:12
  Speaker 3: I was strategy. I was down with the ship.
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: You yeah, Leo, Yeah. I mean the teachers go through
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: it every year. Yeah, yeah, You're gonna be fine.
• 17:22
  Speaker 3: It was I mean, what's it going to be like
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: day three?
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: I don't know, yeah, especially after that, because it'd be like,
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: don't do that again, and it's like, well, I didn't
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: do it.
• 17:30
  Speaker 3: They did it to me, they did it to us.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: I dropped Macy yesterday, which she just went straight back
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: to where she was, but an extra day a week now,
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: which she was really excited to go, and she just
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: took off pretty much. So that was fine. But then
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: this morning I dropped Oscar first year of year one,
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: and he's great, happy, like there was no problems whatsoever.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: But the first couple of days because of all the
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: new kids, the principal is actually at the front.
• 17:56
  Speaker 3: Gate's nice.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah it isn't I thought it was a nice touch.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: Ask it took off and then stopped at the principal,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: shook a hand, and then took off down.
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: The path again.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: I was like what. He actually doubled back to shake
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: a hand too, and I was like what, Like he
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: was just like happy to be there, was like reporting
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: for Judy and took off down the path.
• 18:16
  Speaker 3: That's incredible, I know, and it makes you look like
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: an exceptional farm.
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, but I was like whoa.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: I was like what, I'm just waiting for the fist
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: bump on the next one was like straight through.
• 18:28
  Speaker 3: But I was like even. She turned and looked at
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: me and was like, good one dad for grade one. Yeah,
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: that's that is amazing.
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: He's got more manners than me.
• 18:36
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: Anyway, so he seems to be pretty good. Like he's
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: in a class with a couple of his friends to
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: all of them, which I think is important because it's
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: best that they brand round.
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: How was he when he came home?
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: Sweet?
• 18:47
  Speaker 3: Really? Yeah? My kids so emotional.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like jen Miwa was saying, it's like they hold
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: it in until they come across someone comfortable.
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: We picked him up, went for frozen frozen ice cream.
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: It's a frozen ice cream. It's all frozen, bro.
• 19:05
  Speaker 3: We went for frozen like okay, yep, and also went
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: out for the dinner at the RSL, Like it was we.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: Made a big ordeal out of it.
• 19:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah. There was also all this birthday so we just
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: hear that and then got home and the kids just
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: couldn't regulate any emotion. They was just really like I
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: hate you, I hate this family.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: I was like, okay, yeah, Mina all right until I
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: tried to get him the shower, and then May had
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: a bit of a bit of a meltdown. But like
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: I think Oscar got home, we went to jiu jitsu,
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: so it was kind of like you are what Yeah,
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: the next thing, just.
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: Completely do it. Yeah, just distract, distract, distract.
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: He's a little whippet he is.
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: He's like actually it's like a kelpie. Yeah, he just
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: doesn't stop.
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: And then like I went in too give m a
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: kiss good night last night, and he was fucking playing
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: Lego in bed and I was like, come on, bro,
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: come on.
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: Also, where's the off switch?
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: He's like iceman, So like you know, like we step
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: on a bit of Lego. We're like, that's the worst
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: thing that could possibly happen to any parent.
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: Made his bed the other day just for a fucking lego.
• 20:02
  Speaker 3: He sleeps in.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: It's like a better nails. He's hard in his back up.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: He's gonna be a tough motherfucker when he's wow sleeping
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: and I'm talking he's sleeping on two two blockers, four blockers.
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: None of this flat stuff.
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: What's happen for? Breakfast? Broken glass?
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: What's yeah, He's just like that, it's a really glass
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: of milk. Hold the milk.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: And I was like, the fuck anyway. So he's got like, yeah,
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: he's got a better nails.
• 20:32
  Speaker 3: You're like, do you want me to pick this up?
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: And he's like, that's my bed, bro, the lego.
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: Next day, I'm gonna walk. He's gonna be sleeping his
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: arms cross like vampire.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: He just sleeps on the ceiling.
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: We've got the nanny by the way, who's going really well.
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: But we're still early days. We were very very like
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: polite to each other, and you know, he's still nice
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: to also like a nice around the kids. Kids like her, yeah,
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: kind of like she's kind of doesn't listen to us,
• 21:02
  Speaker 3: and no, she she's great. She's very experienced and she
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: realizes that she comes in and she's like, you know, hey, Lola,
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: you got to brush your hair and you gotta do this,
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: and she's like another parent.
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she's probably done that many times that she knows
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: how to weasele her way into me.
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: She's great. They had the fund fund activities. But at
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: the same time, when the kids get told what to
• 21:22
  Speaker 3: do by another person, they're like, who the fuck are you?
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: But she's like, she's great. We love her. And then
• 21:27
  Speaker 3: even like around her when I'm like, come on, Lola,
• 21:29
  Speaker 3: put your shoes down. Oh where are your socks. You've
• 21:32
  Speaker 3: lost your socks and I've give them to you five times.
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: We've got to find your socks again, that's okay. And
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: then you know, if she wasn't around, I'd be talking
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: a little bit differently.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: Maybe like get your fucking socks.
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: And then I was getting the kids on the bike
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: and Lola always goes to climb on the back of
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: the bike before I'm holding it, and she's, you know,
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: pull the bike on herself. And I was getting my
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: helmet turned around and Lola was climbing into the bike
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: and I was like, don't climb on the bike.
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: What's wrong?
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: You comb on and then then Nanny came down. I
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: was like, oh, she've got a water bottle. I was like,
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: thank you so much.
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: She was probably like, okay, well that's how you're supposed
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: to talk to them. She's probably seen that all before
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: as well. It's just like, sorry, yes, I'm so sorry.
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, Matt. You would have noticed on my
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: stories that I have become part of the problem.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a summer problem. You've changed, Yes, I have,
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: but it's not because of me.
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: It's because of my beautiful wife, who she likes shade
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: well said, you took the words right out of them.
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: When people are like explaining what April's like, and I'm like,
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: just loves the shade.
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: She loves a good shade, hates weird love shade.
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah she had a vampire.
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she hates the check if she's sleeping on a lego.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: But I was like, anti cool cabana. For those of
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: you who don't really know what I'm talking about, there
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: was a couple of years ago there was it was
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: labeled un Australian and it was probably one of the
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: best marketing things for cor Cobar, possibly because I don't
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: hate them, but I find it funny how we all
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: got like the whole nation was up in arms about
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: taking too much room on a beach.
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: Yes, and there's certain beaches like Bond Dive, for example,
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: where your shoulder to shoulder setting up like two meter tent.
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: Just bring your fucking carport, bro. Yeah, seriously, it's the
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: same thing.
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: It's a bit inconsiderate.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: It's a marquee, that's what it is.
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: A market. Yeah, and in that is a semi permanent structure.
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: Could get married under it.
• 23:25
  Speaker 3: You're there laying concrete as foundation, exactly your shade on
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: a beach if it.
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: Gets windy in a range you fucked, yeah, because then
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: you know an umbrella like done, did.
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: You feel guilty buying it? Or that April by.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: April bought it, okay, because I wanted nothing to do
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: with it, and then she's like, I'm going to set
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: it up.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: Of course she didn't set it up.
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: She gave it a go, but it was kind of
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: easy to set up.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I do know that.
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: And the kids actually got involved too, so yeah, I
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: get it.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, fine, Okay, I'm fine with it, but
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: I'm not fine with it because.
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: I'm still like I don't want to be part of
• 23:56
  Speaker 3: the problem.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: After and I said to her, you realize that I
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: shat on them and now I've got one.
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: Do you know how that makes me look? Yeah?
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: So I found a loophole. Going Okay, you would know
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: that the sun rises and sets yep rs in the east,
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: sets in the west. So the shade in which this
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: cool cabana gives off, yeah, is actually not under the
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: cool cabana.
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: It's on an angle, so technically you're not under it.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: Bam. So I'm actually not sitting under any cool cabannas
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: if you see me at the bees that I'm outside
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: the cool cabana and I'm in the shade, he's just
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: I'm not in the shade.
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: He just looks like a predator who's getting real close
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: to it, walking up.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, just walking up and down. Well, that's what I'm
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: trying to say.
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: Is that guy a dad or is he a predator
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: that we need to like help that family out with.
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: So I have found the loophole for shade and not
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: have to be part of the problem.
• 24:52
  Speaker 3: Just to comb to it. So there's They're so good.
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: I feel like if you have a cool cabana, you
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: take a cool round to the beach. Fine, but you
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: need to offer a stranger a bit of shade that's
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: on the outside of it, and then you're good to
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: go because.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: The people next to me no umbrella that will ruar.
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: But anyone said anything, has anyone like giving you grief
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: about the fact that.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: One guy was like, can you update me when you've
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: come to your senses and realized how good it is?
• 25:18
  Speaker 3: And I was like, damn it, great, they're really good.
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: They are good, But I refuse. You will not see
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: me under it. You'll see me outside of it, in
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: the shade. Okay, that's my loophole. But then also as well,
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: I opened the boot in the out the street out here,
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: and I forgot that it was still in the I
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: was like, hiding my shade.
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: It's in the passenger seat.
• 25:41
  Speaker 3: I just need to get something from my car. I
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: look over and you're there, kissing.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: The coolaball you comfortable in there.
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: I'll be quick, don't worry, I'll be back in a
• 25:47
  Speaker 3: couple of Our.
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: Window cracked.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: Now, Matt, New Year brings new I'm not going to
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: call this one a resolution because it's sort of like
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: dare like a milestone.
• 26:00
  Speaker 3: We're like we're beyond resolutions now. Yeah, it's always fair.
• 26:03
  Speaker 3: We aren't fair almost we are. Yeah, fairs, you shut up? Okay,
• 26:08
  Speaker 3: Happy New Year anyway. Macon wears nappies to bed at night.
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: That's it. Love that okay, and she wants to get
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: out of them. We want to get out of them,
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: so we're talking about it.
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: I just say, must be nice to be in the
• 26:22
  Speaker 3: phase of no nappies. That must be nice. Not yet,
• 26:25
  Speaker 3: you're on the cusp.
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: I'm on the casp. And I said to me, hey,
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: when you go back to KINDI when there's more routine
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: because holidays it's a fucking free for all. What do
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: you say we try ditch the nappy at night?
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: What do you say?
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: Is it me the toilet or something we haven't mentioned yet.
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: That's a salesman tactic.
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: And she was like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but she
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: had some rules.
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: What's the rules?
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: Okay, So a toilet seat.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: In our bathroom the on suite it's quite soft clothes, yep,
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: but the one in their bathroom is not get you.
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: And she uses our bar room because of that toilet seat.
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: So she was like, rule number one, we'll get a
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: new toilet seat. Was okay, and then she was like, also,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: creatures come out of the drain. I was like, with
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: the drain in the middle of the floor, like a
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: round drain, and she was like yeah.
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: I was like, well, how about this.
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: We'll go to Bunnings and get you can pick a
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: new toilet seat and we'll get a night light that
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: covers the drain.
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I love that.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and she was like fucking pumped on that. So
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: and also I got to go to Bunnings, So I
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: was like, did.
• 27:33
  Speaker 3: She really ask for your toilet seat?
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: Were you just like no?
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: That was like, what's that?
• 27:37
  Speaker 3: What's that? Macy? You want me to get in the
• 27:39
  Speaker 3: car and drifted Bunnings.
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, let's do it right now. Dad, it's midnight, we'll
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: get there early, bring the cookers in.
• 27:48
  Speaker 3: And I was like all right, So Thursdays is by
• 27:50
  Speaker 3: day with Macy.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: So that's what we did. Went to Bunnings and I
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: let her pick the toilet seat, which I'm going to
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: show you. I'm going to show you a little photo
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: of Macy. This is a two parts this story. Here
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: she is. This is the one she picked. I had
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: to talk her down out of the bedet style.
• 28:07
  Speaker 3: The slow close feature.
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: Man, that really sold. She was sold on that.
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she was.
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: She looks pretty toughed.
• 28:14
  Speaker 3: There was like a little cheap dude torlet seeds get
• 28:17
  Speaker 3: up there a hundred bucks.
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: That was like seventy bucks. I talked to her out
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: of like the three hundred dollars.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: One daddy doesn't have that.
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: Sort of sea anyway. That was one thing. So she's
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: pretty toughed on that.
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: Found that that was really easy. And then I let
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: her pick the nightlight and she was adamant. Had to
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: be a round one and it ended up being like
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: a lantern style, so it had a little thing.
• 28:36
  Speaker 3: And this is just in case she has to wake
• 28:37
  Speaker 3: up in the middle of the night do a wee
• 28:39
  Speaker 3: wize she can do that.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: I wanted to be able to see and she's going
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: to come to your bathroom.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: No, no, no, this is for their bar.
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: Sorry, I'm with you, You're with me.
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: So we went to the section with all like the
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: camping lines the night lives and she's picked out like
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: a lantern camping style one which had a bright setting
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: and like a not so bright setting perfect for night
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: is battery powered as well, so I can remove it
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: and hide it if I need to but what I
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: didn't realize is that this particular and I don't know
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: why they would put this on the lantern, it had
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: a Strobe function. Okay, anyway, so I'm walking past the
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: bathroom at home and I didn't know this, and I
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: look over and it looked like there was a fucking
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: rave going on in my in the in the bathroom.
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: Oh my god.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: So she's raving away in there. See it on the ground.
• 29:26
  Speaker 3: What function is that for?
• 29:28
  Speaker 5: So?
• 29:28
  Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, so you turn it on and it's so annoying.
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: But I keep saying, kids, no rave function? Does she
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: love thee? Well?
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: I know when one of them has been to the
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: bathroom in the middle of it, because I come out
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: in the morning it's still dark, and.
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: The whock it's.
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: Like flashing, like if you if someone had like suffered seizures,
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: it would set.
• 29:51
  Speaker 3: You right off. I feel a bit queasy watching that video,
• 29:53
  Speaker 3: but like, what, like, what is the use of this function?
• 29:57
  Speaker 3: You know who made that?
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: LG Fuck? I'm waiting for it to just when the
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: batteries die, just go. But I was like, kids, no
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: more Strobe functions? And the way you turn it on
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: and you think if you're going to turn on a
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: light like a lamp like that that has a couple
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: of different dimmer levels.
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: Where do you think it would start?
• 30:20
  Speaker 3: Start low? Then right that starts, it goes high like
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: the highest, like the sun, and then it got.
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: You click it against especially in the middle of the night,
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: it goes like a reasonable level and you press it again.
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: Strobe.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: They're the options, just.
• 30:35
  Speaker 3: Like there's a light switch right there.
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: She can't reach so little. Sorry, no, I'm just going
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: to strobe on the neighbors are like, are you guys
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: having a party like all hours of the night, Like
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: it's not like that.
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: In addition to the dishwasher and wait for thee I'll
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: give you an update on the I'll give you an update.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: On how she goes. But so far she weed the
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: bed last night. Painless you scared of the stroke, Matt.
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: There is a segment that we haven't done all year.
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: Do we have a song for this intro?
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: We do? We had two songs, which because we had
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: one song, they hated it.
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we were like it's so bad, it's good and
• 31:16
  Speaker 3: people like no, no, no, no, no, it's just bad.
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: And then we re we rewrote a song.
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: For its parents. Yeah, let's play the song.
• 31:28
  Speaker 5: Want of the.
• 31:28
  Speaker 4: Previous You say, what, man, I feel like a parent?
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, just explain what this segment is, and that is
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: where parents send in things they want to round aback,
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: get off your chest.
• 31:48
  Speaker 3: Just the little parts of parenting that are just a
• 31:50
  Speaker 3: little bit frustrating. It can be big, can be little, whatever,
• 31:53
  Speaker 3: Just like giving you the.
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: Ick, especially after six weeks holidays. I'm pretty sure everything
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: my kid says give me the yick.
• 31:59
  Speaker 3: Now there's there's a one here from Laura. I was
• 32:02
  Speaker 3: studying for exams and the kids were Oh my god,
• 32:05
  Speaker 3: could you imagine studying whilst having kids?
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: Oh sounds horrible.
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: For I was studying for exams and the kids were
• 32:12
  Speaker 3: left to run wild and have as much screen time
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: as they wanted. Here I emerged from my office here here,
• 32:18
  Speaker 3: I just put in it that wasn't written.
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: By the way, thank you for cleaning up. I was confused.
• 32:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I emerged from my office to my house looking
• 32:27
  Speaker 3: like Jamungi. Their food experiments these holidays included smothering the
• 32:31
  Speaker 3: coffee table and honey oh and rolling ten snack bags
• 32:35
  Speaker 3: of popcorn through it as they sat there watching movies.
• 32:38
  Speaker 3: They thought it was genius. Oh my God, kids are
• 32:41
  Speaker 3: so dumb.
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: Where what?
• 32:43
  Speaker 3: Okay? Who's who?
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: Was like, this is going to be a great idea,
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: but they.
• 32:48
  Speaker 3: Smitt in honey?
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: Was it honey? And honey the bags of popcorn?
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: If it wasn't so delicious. I'm so close to banning
• 32:55
  Speaker 3: honey from my house. It's a fucking nightmare.
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: Sticky.
• 32:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, well.
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: That's disgusting, you poor thing. This one's from Jessica, which
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: Jessica is the new Karen, apparently according to the Internet
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: these days.
• 33:09
  Speaker 3: Jessica, if you're listening, don't listen to ash.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: Yes, don't cut your hair into a bob.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: If a reasonabb brought out planning my kid's first birthday,
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: that silly at a very specific time to go between
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: naps for optimal happiness from the beast. I love how
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: I refer to the kid as the beast. Then he
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: drops a nap. Now the party is square in nap
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: time on Valentine's.
• 33:35
  Speaker 3: Day, beautiful, beautiful, never drop a nap. Does Macie still nap?
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: No? But I wish she still did? I miss it.
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: We just a nap together.
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: It was great.
• 33:47
  Speaker 3: I can'd of. I want some more structure with my naps.
• 33:50
  Speaker 2: I wish my Mum never got me out of naps.
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: I just did it as an adult and it was
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: like part of a prerequisite of knowing me.
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: So if I go for a job interview, I'm like, oh,
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: you know.
• 34:01
  Speaker 3: I have siesta, I have a nap.
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: Are you at lunchtime?
• 34:05
  Speaker 3: I have a blanket and and a dummy Rianna student
• 34:10
  Speaker 3: free days on the first day back of term, like,
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: six weeks wasn't long enough. You've got to make us
• 34:14
  Speaker 3: wait another day. I agree, once again, go back to
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: my original point, holidays far too long. Cut it shorter,
• 34:20
  Speaker 3: or split it up.
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: Well, I look, I'm gonna throw some teachers under the
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: bus here. Okay. I overheard, okay, I overheard teachers talking
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: about going back. Okay, they were going back a week early, yep, yep,
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: prep And then they were laughing about still having a
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: pupil free day on the Monday, And I'm like.
• 34:43
  Speaker 2: What was that fucking week for?
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: Then?
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: What was that pupil free day?
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: We didn't have one this time, but in the friday,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: right because some people went.
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: Back on the friday.
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: He told this information.
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: I overheard it was just at a just undersclosed location.
• 35:00
  Speaker 3: I heard it, and I was like, could you confront them.
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: I was just scared still with them and want to me, Yeah,
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: I'm not stupid, and that will teach you. What are
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: going to do? They probably discipled me next minute. I'm
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: fucking doing their work for them. I'm not falling for
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: that anyway. Next time.
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: Okay, this is from.
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: Brodie going on a magical beach holiday for two weeks
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: and the kids winge and fight the entire time. Can
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: we put a ban on winging?
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: They just don't appreciates it?
• 35:27
  Speaker 3: So toxic? Kids are so toxic? Well said, you can
• 35:30
  Speaker 3: give them everything and they just want a little bit more.
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: All I did was just either tell them to stop
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: bickering or stop whinging for six weeks straight.
• 35:41
  Speaker 3: I wasn't listening.
• 35:42
  Speaker 6: Sorry anyway, So I was reading the next pair and
• 35:46
  Speaker 6: what did you say? I nothing, I was reading the Sorry, No,
• 35:53
  Speaker 6: that's okay. Yeah, yeah, I was thinking listen or Tiggins.
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: Or listen to my co host best slash best friend
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: was sitting shot across from.
• 36:02
  Speaker 3: Me, go Alissa asking to go to the park three
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: four hundred and fifty seven times today and forty five
• 36:09
  Speaker 3: degree heat. Also consistent talk of apple juice after being
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: told we're out of apple juice.
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, this is the thing, right, there's only and
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: going back to your point, it's too long the school holidays,
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: you run out of parks to go to. They're bored now,
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: and then you get these days at a forty five grips.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: They don't understand that.
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: And Macy does this thing where she wants something and
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: I can't provide it. She seems to think that if
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: she keeps repeating but I want it, that's going to
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: make any fucking difference.
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: It's it's not new Slash.
• 36:42
  Speaker 3: It's like my kids who can't ride bikes are like,
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: we want to ride our bikes to the beach and
• 36:46
  Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, but you don't know how to ride
• 36:48
  Speaker 3: a bike.
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: Push them down Bellvue Hill.
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: That will learn, And I'm like, it's a hot summer's
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: day right now. We're not learning in Bondai on their
• 36:58
  Speaker 3: busy roads for you to ride your box the fly
• 37:00
  Speaker 3: Marley is love her to death. She's very good at
• 37:03
  Speaker 3: many things. Like the split second i'd let go of her,
• 37:07
  Speaker 3: she's over, she's gone.
• 37:10
  Speaker 2: Oscar took it pretty well actually, but still.
• 37:13
  Speaker 3: I look at boys and they're so good, Like I've
• 37:17
  Speaker 3: I had to lie to Marley and I'm still holding
• 37:19
  Speaker 3: her and she's like, am I doing it? And I'm
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: holding her up and I'm like, yeah, yeah, you're doing great.
• 37:24
  Speaker 3: She's like, wow, I can ride a bike now, and
• 37:27
  Speaker 3: I'm there just like carrying.
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: You're doing the pedals.
• 37:32
  Speaker 3: Ask me one more, Teagan.
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: We just moved to Queensland and the school day starts
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: at eight forty.
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: We're barely making them.
• 37:41
  Speaker 3: I think. I think my round about Queensland is that
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: it's just too hot.
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: They try and get you in and out of school early,
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: because I used to go to school in Tweed and
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: they would start you really early, just to off the
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: back of that tea and was having a wings that
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: they never even make the nine to fifteen bell whenever
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: that whatever, you know, let alone eight forty.
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: But they try and get you in and out.
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: I remember I used to start at like a thirty
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: and finished two thirty because it's so fucking hot and humid.
• 38:07
  Speaker 3: After now, now with air con.
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: How old do you think I am? Yeah, I'm just
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: a guy with a fan.
• 38:13
  Speaker 3: We didn't have air con.
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: There was a brief moment where one of the schools
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: that was being built moved into our school and they
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: had a whole bunch of demandables because it was like
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: a really big block of land that our school was
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: on and they all had air con and we didn't,
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: and we're.
• 38:26
  Speaker 3: In the demandables.
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so we stormed the fucking demands.
• 38:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 38:30
  Speaker 2: Wow, took over.
• 38:31
  Speaker 3: That's like two gangs coming together.
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: Was like that.
• 38:35
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: But I remember when they moved in, it was like,
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: what are all the girls are gonna look like?
• 38:42
  Speaker 3: Anyway?
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: So that's pear rants.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: I hope that everyone feels a little bit better just
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: getting it out in the open.
• 38:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I do. I feel much better. I feel great.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel good.
• 38:52
  Speaker 3: Ash We I're going to bring back another segment that
• 38:55
  Speaker 3: we haven't done in a little while. It is listener questions.
• 38:57
  Speaker 3: This is people who listen to the pod any type
• 39:00
  Speaker 3: of dilemma just want our opinion. Why. We don't know.
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: I don't know either, But I actually think it's the
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: fact that we started talking about giving advice. I think
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: we're now offering nuggets of wisdom and people are aware
• 39:13
  Speaker 3: of that.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: Why are they listening to it?
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: We're experienced. It's the hierarchy purely based on the fact
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: that we have older kids and people who are listening.
• 39:22
  Speaker 3: They then turn to us as the disciples of parenting.
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: Don't I'm going to get a complex.
• 39:27
  Speaker 3: Where like the leaders of a cult, sir to you. Okay,
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: this is from I keep the synonymous because he sent
• 39:34
  Speaker 3: it to me in my DMS and he's saying, I've
• 39:37
  Speaker 3: just become a dad.
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: Congratulations.
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: I concur with a four month old and man, it's
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: tough co sleeping currently and not dealing well with the
• 39:45
  Speaker 3: sleep deprivation mixed with trying and support my wife as well.
• 39:49
  Speaker 3: How do you get through the tough periods?
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: Oh fuck the age old question of how to get
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: through the tough period. There's not a one fix. That's
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: what I'm gonna start this with one fix. And it's like,
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: have you ever seen the movie Twister?
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: Big Fan, Lovely Love. Yeah, and it's sort of like
• 40:07
  Speaker 3: category five.
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: There's part of that is trying to understand more about the.
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: Twisters, Yeah, and the other half is survival.
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: Do you get where I'm going.
• 40:17
  Speaker 3: With The Twisters are unpredictable.
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: Exactly right, But then in the moments of absolute chaos,
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: you just got to do what you can do to survive.
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: And I would say, if I'm going to give any advice,
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: it's be nice to each other, yes, because it'll trickle
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: down so easy to turn.
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: You need to resist that your team.
• 40:38
  Speaker 3: It's way more satisfying when you get through it as
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: a team.
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: If you get through it and you've split up in
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: terms of like had a big barnie and then gone
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: your separate ways for the day or whatever, just start
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: to think about how you could have done it better
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: when you could have just been nice to each other
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: in the first place.
• 40:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's easier said than done, because when you're
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: in the thick of it and you're in the trenches
• 40:57
  Speaker 3: and you're tired, and you're frustrated because you've got to
• 41:00
  Speaker 3: that you're trying to keep alive and it's just not
• 41:02
  Speaker 3: sleeping and it's just hell. Ah, Like anything would set
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: you off. But I know with Laura, for example, she
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: would love it and I need to do it more.
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: If she did anything, whether it was like getting the
• 41:15
  Speaker 3: baby to sleep in one go, she'd come down the
• 41:17
  Speaker 3: stairs and I'd say, you're doing such an amazing job.
• 41:20
  Speaker 3: You really are doing so well as a mum. That
• 41:24
  Speaker 3: would just mean so much to her. Yeah, it's like
• 41:27
  Speaker 3: just the little words of affirmation. Yeah, that's a good one.
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: I mean, some friends of mine have asked me for
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: any advice before having their kids, and I usually have
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: a very similar answer for most of them. One is,
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: there's no point being having two tired parents. Someone needs
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: to be rested at some point, and however, you skin
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: that fine. And I think communication there is key, because
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: there's no point both of you being up at three
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: o'clock in the morning when dad's sitting there doing nothing.
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: I mean, get up, make sure that your partner's okay,
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: get some more, are done. The other rule I've got
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: there is don't fucking talk if you're up at three
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: o'clock in the morning. If your partner says you, hey,
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: I'm thirsty, you can get me some water, don't even
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: say yes. Just go and fucking get it, because if
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: you say yes, the tone's gonna be misinterpreted like.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: Yep, it's like, oh yeah, fucking hard is it. There's
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: no point and you're not in your right mind.
• 42:20
  Speaker 3: Just be quiet, locked in, get it done.
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: And then I always finish with You're gonna love hating
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: it here because you love it so much, but then
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: in the moment like I fucking hate this. But then
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: when that kid smiles back at you, like, I fucking
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: know why I love hating it here so much. It's
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: because of that.
• 42:36
  Speaker 3: Oh actually, can I add to that two things. One
• 42:40
  Speaker 3: take photos and videos of Mum and bub.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, that's a too pronged result for that, because
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: there's one you get to look back. But then when
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: your kids are at an age when they're looking back
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: at it, they love that shit. Bro.
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's a good one.
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: And try and do it when they're not like Hare's
• 42:57
  Speaker 3: dishevel they've just gotten out of bed out and you're
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: there going, yeah, don't do it that. Find a nicer
• 43:04
  Speaker 3: moment where they're outside Bob's asleep, and then you can
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: get a couple of little like candid snaps. Ah. Yeah.
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: I used to have this photo of April.
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: She was still breastfeeding at that moment, and I remember
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: she was sitting out on our balcony and the sun
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: was like perfectly, like the silhouette was perfect.
• 43:22
  Speaker 3: And she was sitting there and I was like a
• 43:25
  Speaker 3: side shot.
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: Fuck, I need to find it now I think about that,
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: But I remember like being like, holy shit, like this
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: woman birthed this child, now she's feeding this child and
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: is still the same person. Fuck. It was just one
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: of those photos you look back and have that vivid memory.
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: So there's a couple of things that I say to
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: my friends, but the most important one is just be
• 43:45
  Speaker 1: kind to each other.
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: And also, I think for yourself as well as a dad.
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: Fill your cup up.
• 43:49
  Speaker 3: On the weekend, I had like a little succession of
• 43:52
  Speaker 3: things going wrong, and I just couldn't shake it. I
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: was in such a little foul move. I lost my wallet.
• 44:00
  Speaker 3: Still I don't know where that is.
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: You still have a wallet?
• 44:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah, well, that's the thing. I don't use the wallet
• 44:05
  Speaker 3: enough that like it's so easily misplaced because I only
• 44:07
  Speaker 3: use it like once a week when I have to
• 44:08
  Speaker 3: wuar something online. I need like the three digits in
• 44:10
  Speaker 3: the back of the card.
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: You can't remember that. You have a terrible memory. I've
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: got too many.
• 44:14
  Speaker 3: Go the business card. I've got the But I lost
• 44:20
  Speaker 3: my wallet. I ran over a nail, got a puncture
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: in the car tire, and then till the things that happened.
• 44:27
  Speaker 3: One Marley flung the fridge door open, and I don't
• 44:31
  Speaker 3: know how she's done this, but the fridge door opened
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: on itself and then like it snapped the joint. The
• 44:38
  Speaker 3: heat fridging and yeah, so the fridge door half came off.
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: Oh she is just the velocity.
• 44:44
  Speaker 3: Like I'm like, what what have you been eating? And
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: so that like just another admin task and I'm like,
• 44:52
  Speaker 3: I'll have to try and figure out how to fix
• 44:54
  Speaker 3: this and then our umbrella and this is so much
• 44:58
  Speaker 3: of my life is great, so I'm just kind this
• 45:00
  Speaker 3: is going to make me sound like I'm being really
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: petty here and ungrateful because I'm focusing on like miniscule
• 45:04
  Speaker 3: things in those days though, But then we had this
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: old cast iron table which is like ten years old,
• 45:10
  Speaker 3: has no sentimental meaning at all, but the umbrella blew
• 45:14
  Speaker 3: over in the wind, hit the table, legs snatch and
• 45:18
  Speaker 3: it's like it's not even a nice table, it's a
• 45:20
  Speaker 3: shit table. But that that just tipped me and I
• 45:23
  Speaker 3: couldn't get out of this rut. I was just like
• 45:26
  Speaker 3: everything is compounding and everything's going wrong and they're all
• 45:29
  Speaker 3: tiny little things, but all together on one weekend, I
• 45:32
  Speaker 3: just was really angry, like the whole weekend and I
• 45:37
  Speaker 3: just feel like wanting to get out of it because
• 45:39
  Speaker 3: I'm like, it's the weekend, and Laura is like, why
• 45:41
  Speaker 3: are you taking it out on me, I just couldn't
• 45:43
  Speaker 3: and for me and maybe people are different, but I
• 45:47
  Speaker 3: need to get out of the house, get out of
• 45:49
  Speaker 3: that environment, a reset, go for a run. I just
• 45:52
  Speaker 3: need to do something to take my mind because I
• 45:54
  Speaker 3: know that if I stay at home, it's just going
• 45:56
  Speaker 3: to compound even more and I'll end up becoming short,
• 46:00
  Speaker 3: frustrated with those around me, and I'm not enjoyable to
• 46:02
  Speaker 3: hang out.
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: With, yeah, for sure, And like it's weird because like
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: I feel like a lot of new parents are so
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: hard on themselves that they've got to get it right.
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: I remember I was so hard on myself. If I
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: couldn't change, then happy first go. It's like it's like
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: having a new job. And we've said this a million times,
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: like go easy on yourself, Like you could be having
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: a shit time because the baby's unsettled or whatever, and
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: then you mess up something so minuscule and you're like
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: beat yourself up of that.
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: Well, even you know the newborns are so temperamental. Even
• 46:34
  Speaker 3: when you've had all these little things go wrong and
• 46:36
  Speaker 3: you're feeling like you're on edge and you're getting really eggy,
• 46:39
  Speaker 3: then something like a poonami or something like your baby
• 46:42
  Speaker 3: not going down for the normal little nap time or
• 46:45
  Speaker 3: their nighttime sleep. That just is enough to set you
• 46:48
  Speaker 3: off and then you feel guilty that you're not enjoying
• 46:50
  Speaker 3: being a parent and getting angry.
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: Pretty normal, I would say, as well, like very normal.
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: Just go easy on yourself, is what we're trying to say. Yes, yes, Matt,
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: quick question for you, just to finish off today. Head
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: wedding or wedding the head? Is it outdated?
• 47:05
  Speaker 3: Did you do it?
• 47:06
  Speaker 2: No?
• 47:07
  Speaker 3: Didn't? I don't think I I don't think I did it.
• 47:10
  Speaker 3: I know that those men are a little bit older
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: than me, those who were in their mid forties. They
• 47:16
  Speaker 3: were like the last generation that I knew of that
• 47:19
  Speaker 3: were going out and wedding the head. And if you
• 47:21
  Speaker 3: don't know what that means, I'm pretty sure it's either
• 47:23
  Speaker 3: when I think it used to be when mum went
• 47:25
  Speaker 3: into labor.
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: I don't even know the origin of it, but it
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: sort of turned into a word or an excuse.
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: To get you.
• 47:31
  Speaker 3: Do you know who started it? Oh?
• 47:33
  Speaker 2: God, here we go.
• 47:34
  Speaker 3: He started it? Who do you think? And I we
• 47:37
  Speaker 3: love these people? What what nationality do you think is
• 47:42
  Speaker 3: aligned with his tradition? Fuck? Who's drunk?
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: Irish?
• 47:46
  Speaker 3: Yep, Wow, that just that loaded up?
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: Wow?
• 47:51
  Speaker 3: Really Yeah. Yeah, the Irish apparently started it and it's
• 47:55
  Speaker 3: trickled down. I don't know if they do it in
• 47:57
  Speaker 3: like other countries.
• 47:58
  Speaker 2: Do they still do in an island?
• 47:59
  Speaker 6: Yeah?
• 48:00
  Speaker 3: Probably, But when baby is born dad, the tradition would
• 48:05
  Speaker 3: be that they would go out to the pub and
• 48:08
  Speaker 3: have a lot of beers to celebrate.
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: Celebrate. Absolutely, I feel like celebrating. There's a very fine
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: line here between celebrating and using it as an excuse
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: to essentially say, see.
• 48:21
  Speaker 7: You, guys, remove yourself, remove yourself from the newborn situation,
• 48:25
  Speaker 7: which I mean different generations. It was a time when
• 48:29
  Speaker 7: men were so far removed from the responsibilities of parenting
• 48:32
  Speaker 7: that they could, after bub was born, check out for
• 48:36
  Speaker 7: not just an evening, but for a.
• 48:38
  Speaker 3: Couple of days afterwards, because you hungover. You had ten beers.
• 48:41
  Speaker 3: Then you're going to be hung over the next day. Meanwhile,
• 48:44
  Speaker 3: your wife's there with a screaming newborn child in hospital
• 48:47
  Speaker 3: still and you're like, sorry, babe, sorry, I've got to go. Yeah,
• 48:50
  Speaker 3: i'll come see you in a couple of days.
• 48:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll be right right back right.
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: And I think I remember someone a while back use
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: the word wedding their head as well.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: It was like we're going to wet the head, but it.
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: Was more inclusive so had it was like it was
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: like we're going to celebrate, as you know, and I
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: think that's way more appropriate. At the point where you're like, Okay,
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: we're home, we're settled. Every relative you ever had has
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: come over for some reason. Everyone wants to see the baby.
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: I've seen a baby before.
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: I want to see it grown up. That's what I
• 49:24
  Speaker 2: want to see.
• 49:24
  Speaker 3: You know, who deserves a drink?
• 49:26
  Speaker 1: Mom?
• 49:30
  Speaker 3: We've done fuck all, we've done now.
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: It was like the best fifteen seconds of our life.
• 49:35
  Speaker 3: How did that tradition get approved?
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: I know how it did?
• 49:38
  Speaker 3: You know? Now we'll leave. It's like for forty eight hours.
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: It's a boy, Hey baby, do you mind if I
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: just nip off to the the Rissole real quick?
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: I really deserve a little a cold one I have passed.
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: I think it's old fashioned. I think it goes out
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: the door with similar to dad goes off to work,
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean. It's sort of like now
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: I feel like previous generations it was sort of like
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: who gives a shit about mum's career? Mum's now at
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: and now it's like, okay, Well, April, when we were
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: having Oscar first, it was like she couldn't wait to
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: go back to work. And I encourage that too, because
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: she has career and aspirations and things that she wants
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: to do. I think it goes out the door with
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: that previous thinking. In a way, it's sort of like
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: when you hit the ship with a champagne bottle and everyone,
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: your friends, men, women, other family.
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: Hooray, we've had a baby.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: Congratulations. Not my wife's just pushed out a fucking watermelon.
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: I'm going to go and get shitfaced. See you in
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: a week, babe.
• 50:39
  Speaker 3: We're not saying don't celebrate it. No, Yes, it's the
• 50:42
  Speaker 3: creation of life. Beautiful, beautiful, it's one of the biggest
• 50:44
  Speaker 3: moments of your life. Well, I had a champagne in
• 50:47
  Speaker 3: the room the next morning with Laura morning and that
• 50:52
  Speaker 3: was lovely. It was nice to include your partner. Yeah,
• 50:56
  Speaker 3: in that let's say tradition. But yeah, I think if
• 50:59
  Speaker 3: you're a soon to be dad and you're excited about
• 51:03
  Speaker 3: the fact that you're going to go have a bender
• 51:04
  Speaker 3: after your baby is born, just maybe reconsider it.
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: There's a big difference between even if you are going
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: to celebrate with your lads, lads, lads with the boys,
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: I still think it's fine as long as it's like
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: not as long as expensive, the expensive of you just
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: being just wanted to.
• 51:20
  Speaker 2: I think if you're going to go.
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: Celebrate with the boys, have a couple of beers or whatever,
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: that's probably the best time to be responsible.
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, because you're going.
• 51:30
  Speaker 3: If ever there was a time to not be completely
• 51:34
  Speaker 3: ship faced, it's after your child is born.
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: That's that. And when when she's in labor.
• 51:39
  Speaker 3: And the men were like, do you know what we
• 51:41
  Speaker 3: need lots of alcohol? Yeah, we go.
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: Let's not be able to drive in cases emergency. Let's
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: be incoherent.
• 51:49
  Speaker 3: What the fuck was that going?
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: Let's be aggressive?
• 51:52
  Speaker 3: What was the older generation thinking, I.
• 51:54
  Speaker 2: Don't know it is, I don't know, I don't know.
• 51:56
  Speaker 3: Look, how did that get passed through?
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: There's going to be so many opportunities for you to
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: go on a vendor after you've had a kid. People.
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: I think people are under the understanding, Matt, just to
• 52:05
  Speaker 1: finish off here that your life's over, it's not because
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: guess what, your mates have kids too, And then you've
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: got drinking dads that you can go drinking with and
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: believe it or.
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: Not, pubs have parks. Now, it's not the end of
• 52:17
  Speaker 2: your life.
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: I think it's sort of Your life does change, and
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: it does change dramatically. But I would say after having
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: kids and all my friends having kids, you're drinking culture
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: becomes so much more enjoyable because you're actually all in
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: the same boat and you're having this confidation. You're winging
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: about your fucking kids while you've got to beer in hand.
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: It's amazing. So don't feel like it's you need to
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: go and get fucking parallel.
• 52:40
  Speaker 3: And also just want to say big shout out to
• 52:42
  Speaker 3: all of our Irish listeners.
• 52:44
  Speaker 2: We love you, yeah, but you're the problem.
• 52:47
  Speaker 3: At the Royal Women's Hospital where we gave birth, it's
• 52:50
  Speaker 3: like nine percent Irish.
• 52:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the midwife's probably like a head winning.
• 52:55
  Speaker 3: We are love you work.
• 52:58
  Speaker 2: Can I come.
• 53:00
  Speaker 3: Ash?
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: That's all we have?
• 53:01
  Speaker 3: That is it? That is it where I'm very excited
• 53:05
  Speaker 3: to try my little lock box.
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah me too.
• 53:08
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: Once again, if you've enjoyed this episode, please leave you
• 53:11
  Speaker 1: a review five stars, little comment, be lovely, or you
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: can catch us on socials across the board Man where.
• 53:18
  Speaker 3: You Sorry, sorry, sorry, that's your cue. That was my
• 53:22
  Speaker 3: I miss I missed the cute. I apologize on Facebook.
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: We're listening to me on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, TikTok get involved.
• 53:33
  Speaker 3: And also some of these questions have been answered in
• 53:36
  Speaker 3: the Facebook group. So if you want to get the
• 53:39
  Speaker 3: opinions of other moms and dads out there who are
• 53:41
  Speaker 3: in the same boat as us and yourself, jump in
• 53:43
  Speaker 3: the Facebook group because it's another beautiful little community of parents.
• 53:47
  Speaker 5: And if you're Irish, We're sorry.
• 54:09
  Speaker 3: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 54:13
  Speaker 3: throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea and community.
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Islander
• 54:23
  Speaker 1: peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land