Latest / Coffee In The Park with Jennifer and Cam / A Coffee with Mike and Lea Stelter from The Ben Stelter Foundation

Transcript

A Coffee with Mike and Lea Stelter from The Ben Stelter Foundation · Coffee In The Park with Jennifer and Cam

• 0:14
  Well, good morning, everybody, and welcome to another edition of the ABA Coffee In The Park.
• 0:19
  My name is Cam Milliken, and I am here with my co-host extraordinaire, Jennifer Herrick.
• 0:24
  Hello, Jennifer.
• 0:25
  Good morning, Cam.
• 0:25
  How are you today?
• 0:26
  Oh, man, it's a great day in Alberta.
• 0:28
  The snow is coming down, and I feel good.
• 0:31
  Do you actually?
• 0:32
  Not really, but anyway, I say that just to, you know, so that people like me.
• 0:35
  But nonetheless, we're coming close to Christmas, and so, hey, a little bit of snow at Christmas is always good.
• 0:41
  I agree.
• 0:41
  Hey, so tell us about some people that are important to us.
• 0:43
  Well, we want to thank our gold corporate sponsors, which include the MyShak Group of Companies, Genics and Parkland County.
• 0:49
  These individual businesses do so much for the Acheson Business Association and we could not do the work we do without them.
• 0:55
  So a big thank you to these companies.
• 0:57
  That's right.
• 0:57
  Thank you very much.
• 0:58
  And hey, everybody, just to let you know that we are coming from the Wall Coffee Roasters in the heart of beautiful downtown Acheson.
• 1:08
  That's right.
• 1:09
  So if you hear some coffee whirring going on in the background or kids screaming or that kind of stuff, hey, it's just because we're in the coffee shop.
• 1:15
  That's where we are.
• 1:15
  That's right.
• 1:16
  Do we have any announcements?
• 1:17
  Well, again, the Christmas campaign is Friday.
• 1:21
  That's right.
• 1:22
  For Acheson.
• 1:22
  For Acheson.
• 1:23
  That's right.
• 1:24
  And we're auctioning off Christmas trees for kids, for toys.
• 1:28
  And we're auctioning off.
• 1:30
  Well, lunch with you and I.
• 1:32
  Okay.
• 1:32
  We should talk about that for a second because that sounds kind of weird.
• 1:35
  Lunch with you and me.
• 1:36
  Yes.
• 1:37
  Is it you and I or you and me?
• 1:38
  It doesn't matter.
• 1:39
  We're having lunch with us.
• 1:40
  We're good.
• 1:40
  That's right.
• 1:41
  So they can bid to have lunch with you and me.
• 1:44
  That's right.
• 1:44
  A five course lunch.
• 1:45
  That's right.
• 1:46
  One of the courses is all you can eat.
• 1:47
  That's all we're going to say.
• 1:49
  I don't know what that means, but nonetheless.
• 1:51
  And all the money we raise is going to go to kids.
• 1:55
  And you can have lunch with me and Jennifer, and you can ask us anything you want.
• 1:59
  And Jennifer will tell you that she was a fighter pilot once, and I'll tell you that I was a rodeo clown once, and all that kind of stuff.
• 2:05
  That's right.
• 2:05
  Yeah.
• 2:05
  So it'll be a fun lunch.
• 2:06
  So auction it off.
• 2:08
  This is to all our friends out there.
• 2:09
  We're counting on you.
• 2:10
  We want a lot of money because we want a lot of toys.
• 2:13
  And we'll tell you what was raised.
• 2:14
  That's right.
• 2:14
  It'll be in the millions.
• 2:15
  Probably not.
• 2:16
  But anyway, nonetheless.
• 2:17
  Hey, anyway, so today I'm really, really, really excited about this.
• 2:21
  Jennifer, introduce our guests.
• 2:22
  Cam, I'm really excited about this too.
• 2:25
  We have two amazing individuals joining us this morning, and anybody, not even in Edmonton, but I think worldwide will know these names.
• 2:35
  Yeah.
• 2:36
  So, it is my complete honour to introduce Mike and Lea Stelter with The Ben Stelter Foundation.
• 2:42
  So, welcome, both of you.
• 2:43
  Hey, good to have you guys.
• 2:44
  Hey, thanks so much for having us.
• 2:45
  Thanks for being here.
• 2:47
  And for braving the weather.
• 2:49
  You are true Edmontonians.
• 2:50
  To come to beautiful downtown Acheson.
• 2:51
  To come to beautiful downtown Acheson.
• 2:53
  You know, the good part about beautiful downtown Acheson is if you got stuck or something, there's lots of big trucks here, the cranes that can pull you out.
• 3:00
  Yeah, so that's the, anyway.
• 3:01
  So glad to have you guys here.
• 3:03
  Thank you for coming.
• 3:04
  Thank you for having us.
• 3:05
  So we're going to start off like we do with all of our guests.
• 3:08
  Mike and Lea, tell us about yourself.
• 3:10
  Where did you both grow up?
• 3:11
  Are you true Edmontonians or are you transplants?
• 3:15
  I'm more of a true Edmontonian than Lea, but she is born here as well.
• 3:19
  But yeah, born and raised in St.
• 3:20
  Albert slash Edmonton.
• 3:21
  Oh, that's kind of Edmonton.
• 3:23
  Yeah, St.
• 3:23
  Albert.
• 3:23
  Yeah.
• 3:24
  Next door.
• 3:24
  Cool.
• 3:25
  And I was born in Edson and then I moved around when I was a child to Florida, South America.
• 3:31
  And then I moved back when I was a teen.
• 3:33
  Okay, now wait a minute.
• 3:36
  First of all, why would you ever? no.
• 3:39
  What took you to all those places?
• 3:41
  My dad works in oil.
• 3:43
  Okay.
• 3:43
  And so we had to move around a lot for his job.
• 3:46
  And so I got to see a lot of cool places when I was a child, but then came back here when I was a teen and I've been in Edmonton ever since.
• 3:52
  Wow.
• 3:53
  Okay, that's kind of cool.
• 3:54
  That is.
• 3:55
  Yeah.
• 3:55
  I mean, South America, Florida and Edmonton on a snowy wintery day.
• 4:00
  Okay, I'm liking that so far.
• 4:01
  That's good.
• 4:02
  Yeah, but I wouldn't change it.
• 4:03
  Yeah.
• 4:04
  So where did you go to high school?
• 4:06
  I went to Bellrose in St.
• 4:07
  Albert.
• 4:07
  Oh yeah, Bellrose.
• 4:08
  Lea?
• 4:09
  I went to Stony Plain and then also Jasper Place.
• 4:11
  JP.
• 4:13
  My rivals.
• 4:14
  I went to Ross Shepard.
• 4:15
  So yeah, you guys were our rivals.
• 4:18
  You always beat us in everything.
• 4:19
  So yeah, anyway, no, that's cool.
• 4:21
  Oh, cool.
• 4:22
  And so give us a little bit of life's journey in terms of after high school and where'd you do?
• 4:27
  What'd you do?
• 4:28
  Where'd you go?
• 4:29
  Yeah.
• 4:30
  After high school, worked in insurance or got into that pretty quick.
• 4:34
  And that was my career for a while.
• 4:37
  And that's where Lea and I ended up meeting at a...
• 4:41
  We both worked at the same company.
• 4:42
  I left, but she was still there and I was doing some contract work.
• 4:45
  So I sort of back and forth to pick up and drop off some files.
• 4:49
  And that's where Lea and I met.
• 4:51
  Right.
• 4:51
  Wow.
• 4:52
  And it was love at first sight or...?
• 4:54
  Yeah, love at first email.
• 4:57
  See, this is the modern day in age.
• 4:59
  Love at first email.
• 5:00
  I like that.
• 5:01
  It's not love at first sight, it's love at first email.
• 5:03
  Well, that's kind of cool.
• 5:05
  And how long you dated, engaged, got married, obviously.
• 5:10
  How long did all that take?
• 5:11
  We dated for about four years and then we were engaged and then we got married after about four years of dating.
• 5:17
  Awesome.
• 5:18
  Cool.
• 5:18
  That's really great.
• 5:20
  And so children, let's talk about that a little bit.
• 5:23
  So you had, have how many children you have?
• 5:25
  We have three children.
• 5:27
  We have Dylan who's 16, Ben who was six and Emerson is six now.
• 5:33
  So you have a 16 year old?
• 5:34
  Yeah.
• 5:34
  Come on.
• 5:35
  Yes.
• 5:35
  Yeah.
• 5:36
  Were you married when you were like 17 or like 15 or how?
• 5:40
  Yeah, exactly.
• 5:40
  Honestly, like unbelievable.
• 5:43
  How does that work?
• 5:44
  You're not old enough to have a 16 year old.
• 5:46
  I know.
• 5:48
  I know. thats what people always say.
• 5:48
  They do.
• 5:48
  That's kind of incredible.
• 5:50
  Like, wow.
• 5:50
  Okay.
• 5:51
  Yeah.
• 5:51
  People always say we look like sisters, so I'll take it.
• 5:53
  Yeah.
• 5:53
  I don't know how she feels about that.
• 5:56
  That's okay.
• 5:56
  That's kind of cool.
• 5:58
  Really great.
• 6:00
  So the 16 year old is in high school.
• 6:02
  Yes.
• 6:02
  She's in grade 11.
• 6:03
  Grade 11.
• 6:04
  Yeah.
• 6:04
  Then Emerson is in grade one.
• 6:06
  Wow.
• 6:07
  That's a bit of a spread there.
• 6:08
  But yeah, that's kind of cool.
• 6:09
  Yeah.
• 6:10
  So tell us about the day for your family, when you found out that your son was diagnosed with cancer, because all of a sudden, your world as you knew then, your life as you knew it, completely changed.
• 6:24
  Yeah.
• 6:26
  It was a Sunday afternoon, and Ben had been playing hockey in the basement.
• 6:30
  He was just playing mini sticks.
• 6:32
  And he came upstairs and said he wasn't feeling well.
• 6:35
  And he started to throw up quite a bit over the span of a few hours, which then led into a seizure.
• 6:43
  And we had to get him taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
• 6:48
  He was only at the hospital for a couple hours, and they did some CT scans, and they saw right away that there was, they told us that there was a mass in his brain.
• 6:59
  Right.
• 7:01
  And that was Sunday evening.
• 7:03
  By Tuesday morning, he was in for surgery to remove the tumor.
• 7:09
  It was about a five to six hour surgery.
• 7:12
  And I mean, midway through the surgery, they came out to tell us that it didn't look good, and that it was cancerous, they already knew that for sure.
• 7:21
  And then from then on, it was just kind of a whirlwind of trying to figure out what that meant to us, to Ben.
• 7:30
  You know, he recovered from surgery so beautifully for about six weeks, and then it was right into radiation and chemotherapy for six weeks straight.
• 7:41
  You know, it was like a full-time job.
• 7:43
  He would go Monday to Friday for radiation at the cross, along with, you know, I would be giving him his chemotherapy at home every single day.
• 7:52
  And yeah, that's just, it was kind of a whirlwind of six weeks of just trying to process the news, but then also take care of him.
• 8:02
  So as parents, how did you process that news?
• 8:06
  Like that's obviously no parent wants to hear that.
• 8:10
  We're parents, nobody.
• 8:13
  We know, you know, the child is going through it, but how did you guys, how did as parents, how do you process that?
• 8:20
  I think it's, you can't even explain how terrible it is to hear your child has cancer.
• 8:27
  Yeah.
• 8:29
  It was one of the hardest things we ever had to deal with, just hearing that and dealing with it, and you trying to process it and just staying positive the whole time, where right at the time, say during surgery, we didn't know the prognosis or what they were going to say, and it's okay, we'll get through it.
• 8:48
  Ben's tough, he'll be able to get through it, and just staying positive the whole time.
• 8:53
  Later on, when he heard the diagnosis that they said, it was glioblastoma, and ultimately this would take his life, it would return.
• 9:03
  The one thing probably harder than hearing your child has cancer from there, and just staying positive, that Benny would be the one to beat it.
• 9:12
  And we didn't ever take it and say, oh shoot, our child's going to die kind of thing.
• 9:17
  It's okay, this is a, hand he's been dealt, let's deal with it, we'll support him and fight with him the whole way.
• 9:24
  Right, right.
• 9:26
  And how does that affect, again, because for those of us who have never gone through it, how does that affect, you had other children, how does that affect the dynamics of your family?
• 9:35
  Like it must have had an impact in a big way in the dynamics of your family.
• 9:40
  I mean, I feel as though the five of us really rallied around Ben, but also really rallied around each other.
• 9:48
  Again, it's really hard to explain that when it kind of all hits you at once, you don't really have time to stop and think.
• 9:56
  I mean, there's some days that you think, oh my goodness, how is this our life?
• 9:59
  But for the most part, I mean, we had 3 kids at the time.
• 10:04
  They were 3, 5 and 15 or 14.
• 10:09
  So, I mean, life was busy anyways.
• 10:13
  But I really feel as though we did a really good job of staying together.
• 10:17
  And it was almost like we would get Ben through his treatment that day.
• 10:22
  He would do what he needed to do.
• 10:24
  And then we would come together just as a normal family, go for a walk, go for a bike ride.
• 10:28
  You know, just try and stay in the now.
• 10:31
  And, you know, let's play like a, let's watch a movie.
• 10:34
  Let's not think about what we did earlier that day.
• 10:39
  And so his treatments were at The Stollery.
• 10:42
  You were at The Stollery a lot.
• 10:43
  We were at The Stollery every single week.
• 10:45
  Yes.
• 10:45
  Yeah.
• 10:46
  He had to go to the cross every single day for his radiation.
• 10:49
  And then we were at The Stollery every week for blood work, to check his blood levels and then just to see how he was doing.
• 10:55
  Right.
• 10:56
  Were you still working at the time, Mike?
• 10:58
  Yeah, still working.
• 11:00
  So it's sort of be able to...
• 11:03
  My boss at the time was incredible and gave me the time off while Ben was in the hospital to be there with him.
• 11:09
  Then it was sort of during COVID, which was sort of a blessing in disguise a little bit, where it was one thing that it did end up working well for our family because we got to be home.
• 11:18
  I had so much time working from home, like just being with the kids, I could still make them lunch or sort of be around in between, you know, they'd be playing around me while I worked, which worked well.
• 11:28
  And then I would take off for Ben's radiation, we'd all, the three of us would pack up and go together and then come back and just sort of work a bit in the evening.
• 11:36
  Sure.
• 11:37
  I guess, yeah, like you say, a bit of a blessing.
• 11:41
  A terrible situation with COVID turned into, for you guys, what was a blessing, yeah.
• 11:46
  That's great.
• 11:47
  And so you're dealing with this as a family.
• 11:51
  Like you think many out there do just daily trying to get through it, but then all of a sudden you're almost in the public spotlight, and that's a very different thing.
• 12:02
  How did you handle that going through this journey?
• 12:05
  That must have been tough for you.
• 12:09
  That one was unexpected, obviously.
• 12:13
  And I will say that there was so many beautiful things about the public kind of knowing about Ben and being able to reach out and support us, you know?
• 12:22
  I feel as though Mike and I were so, I say lucky, but we would receive so many messages of support and love and positivity, you know?
• 12:32
  There were days where it was a little bit hard to navigate when it felt like everybody kind of knew what we were going through or knew Ben, so.
• 12:40
  Yeah.
• 12:41
  Yeah, I mean, that, I mean, thinking about that last night and thinking about today, as Jennifer said, you went from kind of just a family that was going through this situation to now all of a sudden, everybody knows your story and everybody knows about you and knows about Ben, which is wonderful.
• 12:58
  And that, yeah, that must have had some highs and lows in that, especially for you guys.
• 13:05
  Absolutely.
• 13:05
  And I guess Ben's battle was about a year underway before it sort of came into the public spotlight a little bit.
• 13:12
  So it's closer as a family, but we didn't really change after it happened.
• 13:16
  We just kept going the same way, staying positive with him and making sure we made the most out of every day.
• 13:22
  Not that we thought he was going to pass away, but just to make sure every day was the best we could make it for us and the girls.
• 13:30
  And Ben, obviously, just to go out and have fun.
• 13:33
  But there's definitely highs and lows with it sometimes, especially if it would be later on with Ben having a tough day or something like that when sometimes people would see it or send a message or something like that, or it just felt like a little bit more eyes on it, which could make it challenging.
• 13:48
  But the good, far, far outweighed any negative with it.
• 13:52
  The community has been incredibly supportive of us.
• 13:56
  And Ben, they loved him.
• 13:59
  So, tell us a little bit how you were catapulted into that.
• 14:05
  I mean, how did that, was it just a knock at the door one day?
• 14:08
  How did that happen?
• 14:09
  What was the catalyst of that?
• 14:11
  Like, I've always been curious about that.
• 14:13
  Yeah, I know a little bit of the story, but yeah.
• 14:16
  Sure, no, I'll go back.
• 14:17
  It goes back to May.
• 14:18
  So, a couple months after Ben had been diagnosed, met a couple of people, and I guess actually some of Lea's coworkers were trying to put on a birthday car parade for Ben.
• 14:28
  So, still in COVID, we couldn't do a whole lot, go to people's houses or things like that.
• 14:33
  And Ben loved Corvettes.
• 14:35
  That was his favorite car.
• 14:36
  So, Lea's coworkers were sort of planning it a little bit.
• 14:40
  And then one of her coworkers' husbands was friends with somebody in a Corvette club.
• 14:45
  So, they sort of reached out that way.
• 14:46
  And that's how we got involved with one friend, Stuart, who sort of took it and grew it even bigger.
• 14:52
  He connected and he is part of a group called Horsepower For Hope, which does a lot of things for kids battling cancer.
• 14:58
  And they all have super cars, they are very cool cars, which is cool.
• 15:02
  So, it was Ben's birthday, and we were sort of sitting out in the driveway, getting ready for this car parade to come by.
• 15:08
  And then I think Lea's coworker texted and said, hey, this got a little bigger than I thought.
• 15:14
  We didn't think a whole lot of it.
• 15:15
  It's like, okay, we're a little nervous, not sure what to expect.
• 15:18
  It was just some families and mini-vans driving by or what was going to happen.
• 15:23
  But Ben wanted McDonald's for dinner for his birthday that day.
• 15:25
  So I was like, why don't I go grab it?
• 15:27
  Just because it turned into a busy afternoon.
• 15:29
  Ben just got back from treatment.
• 15:30
  And I was like, I'll go pick it up and bring it back home.
• 15:33
  So I left and I was driving maybe five minutes away from my house.
• 15:37
  There's a pretty big parking lot in a warehouse.
• 15:39
  And it was like packed full of cars.
• 15:41
  And I saw, I think Global News was there.
• 15:44
  And I was like, uh-oh, I have a feeling that's for us.
• 15:48
  So I got the food quick and we got back home.
• 15:50
  And I'm like, Lea, there's a ton of cars.
• 15:52
  The news was there, like this looks big.
• 15:55
  Sure enough, a few minutes later, we ate quick, came outside and Global News was outside and they wanted to interview us and it's like, okay, what's going on?
• 16:04
  Would this be the first interview?
• 16:06
  This would be the first time?
• 16:07
  Yes.
• 16:07
  The first one.
• 16:08
  So then it starts and I think we heard a police siren going and we saw this police car come around the corner.
• 16:15
  And it was like escorting the whole group of cars.
• 16:18
  And it was wild.
• 16:20
  We felt, I guess, to backtrack just a little bit, we let the community know sort of on the community Facebook page like, hey, sorry, this is what happened.
• 16:29
  The neighbors are phoning the police.
• 16:31
  Traffic jam in the neighborhood.
• 16:32
  They were there.
• 16:35
  If this plugs up the neighborhood a little bit, we're sorry.
• 16:38
  But there was way over 100 cars.
• 16:40
  Like it was huge and so many cool cars.
• 16:43
  And there's some motorcycle groups that came out as well.
• 16:46
  And it was wild and all the cars drove by twice.
• 16:49
  But it plugged up the neighborhood so bad.
• 16:51
  There's like one way in, one way out.
• 16:53
  And luckily, there is no emergencies or anything that happened.
• 16:57
  But it was pretty cool to look down the street and see, like all the kids throughout the neighborhood were on their driveway, just like with their jaws dropped watching these cars drive by.
• 17:05
  Yeah.
• 17:06
  And it was really cool.
• 17:07
  But there was one car in particular.
• 17:09
  It was a red Ferrari and it had Conor McDavid on the side of it and Leon Drasaitl on the other side with Mike Smith on the hood.
• 17:16
  And Ben, loving the oilers, got super pumped when he saw this car and jumped up and asked if we can get a photo.
• 17:23
  So we got a photo of the car in front and we sort of exchange information with the person who dropped off a gift for Ben as well.
• 17:30
  So we emailed after just saying thank you so much and how much that meant to us.
• 17:35
  And he reached out later, knowing how much Ben loved the oilers and Connor McDavid.
• 17:40
  Right.
• 17:41
  And we were able to connect to get him to meet Connor.
• 17:44
  So his name is Ashif Mawji.
• 17:46
  Yes.
• 17:46
  Incredible guy.
• 17:47
  He's very close.
• 17:48
  Yes, I've met Ashif.
• 17:49
  He's a wonderful friend.
• 17:50
  We consider him family now.
• 17:52
  Yeah.
• 17:53
  But he set it up at his house for Ben to meet Connor after his second surgery.
• 17:58
  So that was in the end of December.
• 18:00
  It started December later that year in 2021.
• 18:06
  So fast forward a little bit.
• 18:07
  We were there, got to meet Connor McDavid.
• 18:10
  Ben thought we were going to Ashif's house to meet his dog.
• 18:13
  We didn't tell him.
• 18:16
  Ben wouldn't.
• 18:16
  That's good.
• 18:17
  That's probably just as exciting.
• 18:19
  No kidding.
• 18:19
  I was like, okay, sure, yeah.
• 18:21
  As we get to see the car again.
• 18:24
  Ben wouldn't show too much that he was disappointed, but he was like, okay, we'll see the dog.
• 18:28
  And Connor walked in the house.
• 18:30
  And it was during COVID.
• 18:31
  Connor still had his mask on.
• 18:34
  And Ben jumped up on the couch right away.
• 18:35
  He's like, Connor, it's Connor.
• 18:37
  And he knew right away, which is so cool, just from his eyes.
• 18:40
  And just from there, that's sort of where the friendship started.
• 18:45
  They're just having each other laughing and telling stories and asking each other questions, which was so cool.
• 18:52
  But fast forward from there until, I think it was probably end of February, Ashif called one day and he's like, hey, would Ben ever be interested in being the Scotiabank skater?
• 19:04
  And I was like, yes, absolutely.
• 19:06
  Yeah, for sure.
• 19:07
  Why?
• 19:07
  What's going on?
• 19:08
  And Ashif just happened to meet Brian Porter from Scotiabank at an event.
• 19:13
  And he told him about Ben and they had a couple rules that you have to be, I think, 11 or 12 in order to be it.
• 19:18
  Ben was five.
• 19:20
  So he was like, let me see if we can bend some rules a little bit here.
• 19:25
  So we called back a day or two later and he's like, they can make it work.
• 19:28
  They want Ben to be the Scotiabank skater, which was cool.
• 19:32
  So Ben hadn't skated in a little while.
• 19:34
  So we had a couple of weeks to sort of train him skating.
• 19:39
  Put him in training.
• 19:40
  Yeah.
• 19:40
  So there's a little outdoor rink sort of close to our house.
• 19:43
  So Ben was out there with a oiler's flag on a broomstick, one of Lea's broomsticks, just to practice, because that's what the Scotiabank skater did.
• 19:52
  So we were practicing a little bit.
• 19:54
  And then when we got there that day, the flag was a little bit big, they thought.
• 19:58
  So they got Ben a little hockey stick, which was even cooler.
• 20:01
  So he got to be just like the players out there, got them all geared up, and we had the GoPro on his helmet so he could capture it a little bit.
• 20:12
  Went out.
• 20:12
  It was incredible.
• 20:13
  And we thought that's where the night was going to end after Ben went out and skated.
• 20:18
  But just the response from all the fans in there was incredible and overwhelming just for how loud they cheered and how long they cheered for Ben.
• 20:26
  It was so special and tugged on our heartstrings for our families, but just let us know that we were loved and supported.
• 20:35
  They won the game and it was a surprise that Ben got to go into the dressing room after.
• 20:39
  And it was so cool just to see all the guys, get his picture with them.
• 20:44
  He's sort of posing with some of the players, getting some photos and Zach Hyman comes up.
• 20:48
  He's like, Hey Ben, you want to go do a presser with me?
• 20:50
  He's like, Okay.
• 20:52
  And he just took off and walked down the hall with Zach Hyman to get on the podium.
• 20:57
  Okay, can I just start?
• 20:58
  Now, you guys are what?
• 20:59
  You're just standing there going, Like, jaws drop.
• 21:02
  Like what?
• 21:03
  Like, let's even go back to the night of the cars.
• 21:06
  And the cars went, and when you went to bed that night, what did you say to each other?
• 21:09
  Like, wow, that was really cool.
• 21:11
  And, you know, you had no idea how this would morph into what it did.
• 21:16
  What was it like?
• 21:17
  I think we were just so in disbelief at how big it was, how incredible everybody was, that they took time out of their day, out of their evening, to come drive by our house, to wave to Ben.
• 21:27
  And again, it was just, it was a magical experience, just like the night he skated, you know?
• 21:36
  And still to this day, two years later, you know, we still talk of those moments, we still look at those photos, and it brings us such happiness and joy, because we, I can still feel how happy Ben was.
• 21:48
  Yeah.
• 21:48
  Yeah.
• 21:49
  I mean, I just, I can't, if I was going to bed and that happened, I'd be like, well, where am I?
• 21:55
  Like, what happened here?
• 21:56
  And it's really cool how it just, it just, again, I've used the word organically began to sort of morph into what it has become.
• 22:04
  Absolutely.
• 22:04
  Yeah.
• 22:05
  And so that must be incredible.
• 22:08
  So, yeah, you got to meet Connor, got to meet all the guys, did the presser.
• 22:11
  Yeah.
• 22:11
  And then did you walk away going, well, that was all great.
• 22:14
  Yeah.
• 22:14
  Then we- What next?
• 22:15
  Or- No, we, it was totally like, that was awesome.
• 22:19
  And like, night ended, time ended.
• 22:21
  Like, that's all we thought it was.
• 22:23
  Right.
• 22:23
  Yeah.
• 22:24
  Yeah.
• 22:24
  And then it was the next day where the, you know, different news outlets were reaching out to us, Mike and I, saying, can we do an interview?
• 22:32
  And we turned them all down.
• 22:35
  But we just thought, no, we just want to hang out with Ben.
• 22:37
  And Ben doesn't want to talk to, you know, he didn't, that wasn't his thing.
• 22:40
  I do.
• 22:41
  I love that.
• 22:41
  I love that you told us that because, you know, I think some people would think, oh yeah, they jumped on it and signed every, you know, and you didn't do that.
• 22:49
  Ben absolutely loved the spotlight.
• 22:51
  Lea and I absolutely hate it.
• 22:54
  We do not like it.
• 22:55
  No, Benny was our social butterfly.
• 22:57
  Yeah, for sure.
• 22:58
  Yeah.
• 22:58
  Wow.
• 22:59
  And that's good for people to know because, again, we can't imagine what you were going through.
• 23:04
  And yeah, if you don't want to be in the spotlight, then you know, you're.
• 23:07
  And I think one of my favorite moments from that night was at the very end and we were wrapping up saying goodbye to the players.
• 23:13
  And Benny looked at me and he said, mommy, now I know.
• 23:18
  I finally understand.
• 23:20
  Happy tears.
• 23:21
  Because I would always say like, oh, I'm crying happy tears.
• 23:24
  And Benny said that to me.
• 23:25
  Wow.
• 23:25
  Right.
• 23:26
  in Rogers, you know.
• 23:27
  Just he was he was just so good with his feelings.
• 23:30
  Yeah.
• 23:31
  And he knew how special it was.
• 23:33
  And incredible.
• 23:35
  Yeah.
• 23:36
  Yeah.
• 23:36
  And it has it has grown into something incredible.
• 23:39
  And of course, Ben passed away.
• 23:42
  That obviously was an extremely difficult time and still is, I'm sure.
• 23:47
  But it's it's just awesome to see the legacy carry on, but that you're still part of that.
• 23:52
  You've kept that going and wanted to keep that going.
• 23:55
  And I think that's amazing.
• 23:57
  How did, you know?
• 23:58
  Was there ever times maybe after Ben passed away where you thought, well, now we just move on sort of with our lives and heal and do that?
• 24:06
  Or you just know you wanted to grab the bull by the horns and away you go here?
• 24:11
  Not even so much.
• 24:13
  I don't it's so hard to explain.
• 24:14
  And it is the worst thing by far that we've ever been through.
• 24:18
  I can imagine losing a child.
• 24:20
  You can't even describe the hurt and how it doesn't go away.
• 24:25
  But Ben had such a big heart and just wanted to help other kids so much, whether it was buying toys for the treasure chest at the Stollery.
• 24:32
  So kids could get something good because a couple of times he went, there weren't the best toys in there.
• 24:37
  And he's like, there needs to be better stuff.
• 24:39
  So he would do that and be buying toys to to donate to other kids with cancer.
• 24:44
  And and just with the cool thing Ben's got to experience, it helped our family through the battle and journey so much and helped Ben where we can have these little moments where you can sort of escape reality and just enjoy it and forget about the cancer and everything like that.
• 25:00
  And we wanted to be able to do that for other families.
• 25:02
  Yeah.
• 25:03
  Well, and you certainly have and are and it's absolutely phenomenal.
• 25:08
  But the story doesn't end there in that respect that then Mike, you went through a challenge with cancer.
• 25:15
  Do you want to talk about that at all or where that's at?
• 25:18
  Or I know people are always wondering where you're at.
• 25:21
  Yeah, we can.
• 25:21
  I had wild back pain about a year and a half ago, two years ago, just about.
• 25:27
  It was in March of 2022, or no, sorry, 2023.
• 25:31
  Yeah.
• 25:32
  Kept going out there like, oh, it's a slipped disc, it's that, it's all these other things.
• 25:36
  And I'm going for like massage physio, all these things just kept making it worse and worse.
• 25:40
  Yeah.
• 25:42
  Finally had an MRI done, and they found a tumor growing on my spine, which explained the pain a little bit, obviously.
• 25:49
  So I've been going through that now.
• 25:52
  The treatment I needed is called proton therapy.
• 25:55
  Right.
• 25:55
  It's an advanced type of cancer treatment.
• 25:57
  It can be a little bit stronger, more precise than regular radiation that we have here in Canada.
• 26:05
  But Canada is the only country that doesn't have this treatment.
• 26:08
  So right now, hundreds of Albertans have to travel to the United States every year for this treatment.
• 26:14
  And it's not people hopping on Google to say, hey, what's the best treatment for me?
• 26:18
  This is what their oncologist is recommending.
• 26:23
  So funny enough, we had been working as the foundation trying to bring this here.
• 26:28
  We had had a lot of meetings about it, learning all about it.
• 26:32
  And when my oncologist said, what you need is proton therapy, it was sort of laughed in a sick way, thinking, of course.
• 26:42
  But we seem to know more about it than the people here, just because we don't deal with it so much.
• 26:47
  So it's like, okay, that's the plan.
• 26:48
  That's what we have to do.
• 26:49
  So last fall, I had to travel to Philadelphia for a treatment for eight weeks.
• 26:55
  Had all the treatment done, that was sort of, hit my low point, I'd say, probably, about the end of treatment.
• 27:02
  I was having a real hard time getting around, walking around.
• 27:06
  You would have to push me in a wheelchair in some places just because I couldn't.
• 27:10
  But it's been much better now.
• 27:12
  Now that the treatment has sort of given it a little bit of time to go through and work.
• 27:17
  I'm doing much better now.
• 27:19
  So I just had my last scan saying there's no new growth.
• 27:22
  I'm not on all the pain meds and steroids and all those terrible things anymore.
• 27:28
  Where is the proton therapy at in terms of coming to Canada?
• 27:32
  Are we any closer or are we?
• 27:34
  Well, he said Alberta though.
• 27:35
  Or Alberta?
• 27:36
  Yeah.
• 27:37
  Are we any closer as your awareness?
• 27:39
  Yes.
• 27:40
  So we have announced plans with the foundation to bring the Ben Stelter Center for Proton Therapy and Neurosciences to Edmonton.
• 27:50
  Everything is going very well on the project right now, and it's on target to break ground coming up in 2025.
• 27:56
  Oh, fantastic.
• 27:58
  Is there anybody holding you up?
• 28:00
  Because we'll go after them.
• 28:02
  Trust me.
• 28:03
  We'll make some calls.
• 28:04
  We're very, yeah.
• 28:08
  I love this.
• 28:09
  If there's anybody in your way, just tell us.
• 28:11
  We'll, it's part of what we do.
• 28:15
  No, we have an incredible team working on it.
• 28:18
  WestCan Proton Therapy and Edmonton Global has been incredible for connecting everybody.
• 28:25
  Malcolm Bruce has been outstanding for us.
• 28:28
  So it's going underway very well.
• 28:29
  It'll be the first one in Canada, which is huge.
• 28:32
  So it's probably going to be at capacity quite quick as people from Western Canada are going to be travelled.
• 28:38
  All over.
• 28:38
  Of course.
• 28:39
  Incredible.
• 28:40
  But knowing firsthand how terrible it is to be able to, or have to separate from your family to go for this treatment.
• 28:46
  And Ben's oncologist sits on our board.
• 28:50
  She's told us that she's worked with families where they recommend proton therapy for the child and the family has to turn it down because they can't afford to go and they can't make it work.
• 28:59
  And I couldn't imagine having to say no to the best treatment available for your child and the regret you could have with that.
• 29:07
  So tell us a little bit about the foundation.
• 29:12
  Well, it started as a small idea right after Benny passed.
• 29:16
  You know, Mike and I would go on walks, just talking about what we wanted to do for other children who have cancer.
• 29:23
  And it started honestly just with us wanting to buy toys to bring to the hospital, you know, the way that Ben would get them, you know, after a needle or when he had to stay there.
• 29:33
  And that's really how it started is, you know, how can we give back?
• 29:37
  And that's where it started with the magical experiences, because we just wanted to do something positive and bring joy to other families.
• 29:44
  And then it snowballed, and then once we started talking with a Ashif, he had some big ideas too, and then it just kept growing and growing, and it continues to, you know, we have big ideas and big goals.
• 29:59
  So we're coming up to the end of the year, biggest giving time of the year, folks, we all know that.
• 30:03
  Well, it was just giving Tuesday.
• 30:05
  Yeah, just yesterday was giving Tuesday, and so tell us, give us all the goods as to how people can get involved and donate to The Ben Stelter Foundation.
• 30:17
  Oh, that would be incredible.
• 30:19
  They can search us up on our website, benstelterfoundation.com, social media, Ben Stelter Foundation as well, find us there.
• 30:26
  There's links for everything where they could donate.
• 30:29
  They could become a monthly supporter for The Ben Stelter Foundation, which would be huge for us.
• 30:34
  A one-time donation would be incredible as well.
• 30:38
  Any support from the community goes so far.
• 30:40
  And you can know that with your donation coming in, the money is going to the cause.
• 30:45
  There's not a lot of overhead expenses.
• 30:48
  Our expense ratio last year was at 94%.
• 30:51
  Meaning, 94, 96, 96%.
• 30:54
  So only 4% of total money coming in went to admin or overhead costs, which is amazing.
• 31:01
  Jennifer and I have both worked for years in non-profit.
• 31:04
  Yes, we know.
• 31:05
  We know.
• 31:06
  So that is amazing.
• 31:07
  And to hear that statistic, folks, let me tell you something.
• 31:09
  Right there, that's the reason.
• 31:12
  One of the good reasons.
• 31:13
  I mean, not the reason, but one of the great reasons to give to The Ben Stelter Foundation, because you know your money is going where it needs to go.
• 31:21
  That's fantastic.
• 31:22
  And not only that, for all of our corporations and business folks out there, if you're gonna think about giving, give to The Ben Stelter Foundation because it can go a really long way.
• 31:34
  Because you're all business people, and the first question you're gonna ask is what percentage goes to admin.
• 31:39
  And to hear this, it just blows me away.
• 31:42
  It tells me it's probably one of the, if not the most credible place to put your money right now.
• 31:47
  That's fantastic.
• 31:48
  That's absolutely fantastic.
• 31:50
  Thank you.
• 31:50
  So, yeah.
• 31:51
  It's something we're proud of, but we feel we're held accountable by Benny.
• 31:55
  His name's on everything.
• 31:56
  We have to be able to make him proud.
• 31:58
  And just knowing how much these families and children battling cancer need it, we want to make sure no dollar gets wasted.
• 32:05
  Right.
• 32:06
  Yeah.
• 32:07
  Wow.
• 32:07
  Well, Cam and I can't thank you enough for sharing this.
• 32:11
  We can't even imagine.
• 32:12
  I mean, I know you've done this a million times and our little podcast is out there, but thank you for coming.
• 32:18
  I mean, your story is unbelievable, incredible.
• 32:23
  I know you hear this, but it's heartfelt from both of us.
• 32:25
  So heroic and the difference that Ben is making, but that you in carrying on his legacy is amazing.
• 32:33
  And like I say, we've we've been in the nonprofit a lot and you get to see a lot of things.
• 32:40
  But when you hear a story like this, you get you get a little emotional because you just know it's making a huge difference.
• 32:48
  And yeah, it's just, sorry.
• 32:52
  Thank you for that.
• 32:53
  I appreciate it.
• 32:54
  Honestly.
• 32:56
  So folks, we don't say this a lot or very often, except to have lunch with Jennifer and I.
• 33:02
  You need to bid high.
• 33:04
  But I would even be happy if you took that money and gave it to the Ben Stelter Foundation.
• 33:09
  I really would because I think this is absolutely amazing to both of you and you.
• 33:13
  You are heroes too.
• 33:15
  You are.
• 33:16
  And the whole purpose that we always say of ABA Coffee In The Park is to tell the story behind the story.
• 33:23
  And the story of Ben is amazing, but your story is amazing as well.
• 33:28
  As parents, as a husband and a wife, and as what you're going through together, phenomenal.
• 33:36
  Just absolutely you are heroes.
• 33:38
  And so thank you for taking the time on a snowy day to come all the way to the beautiful downtown.
• 33:44
  How beautiful downtown is.
• 33:46
  Sorry if it disappointed you.
• 33:49
  Anyway, folks, thank you for listening and appreciate it.
• 33:53
  Appreciate our listeners.
• 33:54
  Make sure that you...
• 33:56
  Do you have anything else you want to say?
• 33:58
  I think we've said it all.
• 34:00
  So make sure you tell your business associates.
• 34:03
  Make sure you tell your friends.
• 34:04
  Make sure you tell your enemies.
• 34:05
  If you don't have any friends, make one so you can tell them about this podcast.
• 34:09
  Wherever you get your podcast or at www.Achesonbusiness.com, you can download it from there.
• 34:15
  Thank you for listening.
• 34:16
  Thank you, everybody.
• 34:17
  Thank you, Mike.
• 34:17
  Thank you, Lea.
• 34:18
  We love you guys.
• 34:20
  Hey, we'll see you next time, everybody.
• 34:21
  Thanks, everyone.
• 34:22
  See you next week.