Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Mr. Malcolm's List | Guest Dayo Anjohnikoo Enneagram One

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Mr. Malcolm's List | Guest Dayo Anjohnikoo Enneagram One · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

0:02
SPEAKER_00: Hey friend, welcome to a special episode that I have been looking forward to recording and releasing to you.
0:11
SPEAKER_00: Dio Anagonico joins me to discuss a movie we both enjoyed the summer.
0:18
SPEAKER_00: Dio is an Enneagram 1, a Berkeley law student, and an Enneagram enthusiast behind the Instagram count, the Black Enneagram.
0:29
SPEAKER_00: Now, did you see the movie Mr.
0:31
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's List?
0:32
SPEAKER_00: If so, what did you think?
0:35
SPEAKER_00: I thought it was so good.
0:38
SPEAKER_00: And as I watched it, I was figuring that the creators of the movie or the writer of the book had to have some understanding of the Enneagram.
0:47
SPEAKER_00: There were so many characters displayed with specific traits, attributing to different Enneagram types, which was such fun for me as I sat in that movie theater this summer.
1:00
SPEAKER_00: Truly, as I watched it, this movie screamed Enneagram out loud.
1:05
SPEAKER_00: Now, I've wanted to do a Jane Austen episode of all my favorite characters of the Jane Austen, but I really need my sister on board for this one.
1:14
SPEAKER_00: Well, one of my sisters on Elise.
1:16
SPEAKER_00: And she has been very busy this summer preparing to get married, so she turned me down.
1:21
SPEAKER_00: I'm hoping next summer we can do a Jane Austen and an Eagram conversation.
1:27
SPEAKER_00: But anyway, as I watched Mr.
1:31
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's list, I thought, oh, this is the perfect one, and who better to do this with me than Dio?
1:37
SPEAKER_00: Okay, now, if you haven't watched the movie, be warned, there are spoilers galore throughout this episode.
1:46
SPEAKER_00: And if you have watched this movie, it'll be extra fun to hear the Enneagram insights on the characters.
1:53
SPEAKER_00: If you haven't watched the movie, I think you're gonna want to after listening to this, and after you do, I'd love to hear if you agree with Dio and R's take on each personality type.
2:05
SPEAKER_00: Now, Dio and I didn't swap notes before this episode, so you're gonna hear Canada thoughts on the Enneagram typing that we assign to each character and why.
2:15
SPEAKER_00: And we don't always give the same typings or necessarily see it the same way, but that's what was fun about this.
2:21
SPEAKER_00: We're not talking about real human beings, we're just talking about characters in a beautiful movie.
2:28
SPEAKER_00: Now, to give you a little backstory on the movie itself, Mr.
2:32
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's list is set in 1818 during the Regency period, which is why this was a good fill-in-the-gap for me on a Jane Austen movie.
2:42
SPEAKER_00: So, in this movie, the honorable Mr.
2:45
SPEAKER_00: Jeremy Malcolm is searching for a wife, and not just any wife.
2:50
SPEAKER_00: As the target of matchmaking mothers and desperate debutants, he is determined to avoid fortune hunters and find a near-perfect woman who will meet the qualifications on his well-crafted list.
3:03
SPEAKER_00: But after years of searching, Mr.
3:05
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's beginning to despair of ever finding this paragon until Selena Dalton arrives in town.
3:12
SPEAKER_00: Selena is a victor's daughter of limited means and is a stranger to high society.
3:18
SPEAKER_00: So she is thrilled when her friend Julia Thistleweight invites her to London.
3:22
SPEAKER_00: And then she learns she's invited to be part of a plot to exact revenge on Mr.
3:28
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm.
3:29
SPEAKER_00: Selena is reluctant to participate in Julia's scheme, especially after meeting the irresistible Mr.
3:35
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm, who appears to maybe be a little bit different from the arrogant scoundrel of Julia's description.
3:42
SPEAKER_00: Now, Julia's description is based on the fact that she has failed to meet an item on Mr.
3:48
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's list of requirements for a bride.
3:52
SPEAKER_00: So she, in essence, has been jilted by London's most eligible bachelor.
3:57
SPEAKER_00: Since Julia's feeling humiliated, she is determined to exact revenge.
4:02
SPEAKER_00: And that is why she has invited her friend and therefore convinces Selena Dalton to play the role of his ideal match.
4:11
SPEAKER_00: Soon, Mr.
4:12
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm begins to wonder whether he's found the perfect woman or the perfect hoax.
4:18
SPEAKER_00: Okay, are you intrigued about this movie and our thoughts on the personalities within it?
4:24
SPEAKER_00: Then I would love for you to keep listening for some fun Enneagram insight.
4:33
SPEAKER_00: Hi, I'm Amy Wicks, a Jesus and Enneagram enthusiast.
4:37
SPEAKER_00: As a wife, mama of three humans, and a fur baby, I get it.
4:42
SPEAKER_00: Juggling entrepreneurship in a family is challenging.
4:46
SPEAKER_00: But I believe the Lord does want your work to be enjoyable.
4:50
SPEAKER_00: As an Enneagram type 7, I am all about the fun factor.
4:53
SPEAKER_00: And this podcast is here to help you put the joy back into working fun life.
4:59
SPEAKER_00: So you can see 1 Timothy 617.
5:05
SPEAKER_00: It's a verse that says, God has given us all things to enjoy.
5:12
SPEAKER_00: Motherhood, working in home life, or working out of the home life.
5:16
SPEAKER_00: With the heart of home, there is truly a way to feel home.
5:20
SPEAKER_00: Balance, joy, clarity, and peace in any arena of life.
5:26
SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Simply Art Podcast, where you can expect solo-style and interview-style episodes.
5:34
SPEAKER_00: Full of faith-based concepts, simple ideas, enneagram insights, alongside practical tips to help you put that smile back on your face when it comes to doing life with Jesus.
5:46
SPEAKER_00: Now get your headphones and head to that big pile of dishes in the sink.
5:52
SPEAKER_00: Or maybe that bathroom that needed cleaning two weeks ago.
5:55
SPEAKER_00: And let's get to learning together.
6:11
SPEAKER_00: Hello.
6:13
SPEAKER_00: Well, I am so excited to have you on the podcast.
6:17
SPEAKER_00: We got to chat last year for the summit and we're getting to share a really new, exciting event of Enneagram for the summit this year.
6:28
SPEAKER_00: But before we're going to kind of go back to our roots and have some fun with the Enneagram.
6:32
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
6:32
unknown: Yeah.
6:34
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
6:35
SPEAKER_00: Well, I've already told our friends here who are turning in for this special episode what Mr.
6:42
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's list is all about, a little bit of the background and the story surrounding it.
6:48
SPEAKER_00: And I I don't know about you, but I I honestly had seen a preview and then forgotten about it.
6:55
SPEAKER_00: And it was a last minute, like I think 45 minutes before the last show in the city, where of my mom and my daughters, we bought tickets, we went, and I'm sitting in the seat and I'm like, oh, I was so excited to see this.
7:11
SPEAKER_00: So tell me, what did you think?
7:13
SPEAKER_00: Because I kind of after watching it, I don't think I waited a couple hours and I was like, Dio, we need to we need to talk about this movie.
7:21
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, I had a very interesting experience with this movie.
7:26
SPEAKER_01: Um, I think it might be this the season of my life that I'm at, but I think it was it felt very personal.
7:31
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
7:32
SPEAKER_01: Felt very personal because I just could resonate with a lot, like I could resonate with all of the characters.
7:36
SPEAKER_01: Like every single one of them, every single one of them I felt like I know why you're doing that.
7:40
SPEAKER_01: Like I do that and I know why you're doing that.
7:44
SPEAKER_01: Oh your stage of life, your chapter, your life.
7:46
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
7:47
SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
7:48
SPEAKER_01: Right.
7:48
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it just felt very, very, it made a lot of sense.
7:50
SPEAKER_01: And I think I loved, I love the storyline.
7:52
SPEAKER_01: I love my favorite part of the movie was when Malcolm speaks Yoruba.
7:56
SPEAKER_01: I was like, wait, why would they add that?
7:59
SPEAKER_01: That was so beautiful.
8:00
SPEAKER_01: Like I love that little edition where he like is talking to Selena and he speaks Yoruba for like a second time.
8:06
SPEAKER_01: I like it, it stopped me in my chats.
8:08
SPEAKER_01: I did not think he was I didn't even know you're gonna do that.
8:11
SPEAKER_01: That was like my favorite part with like seeing that.
8:13
SPEAKER_01: I think you had even mentioned like the diversity was incredible.
8:15
SPEAKER_01: I didn't know it was that diverse, like the permission for him to show up as his full authentic stuff in this period piece.
8:21
SPEAKER_01: Like, period pieces make me uncomfortable because they just don't feel like inclusive.
8:25
SPEAKER_01: I don't like so I don't watch Burton, so I'm just like this is uncomfortable.
8:28
SPEAKER_01: I don't feel like I'm I belong here.
8:30
SPEAKER_01: But I think them putting that small thing made me like it changed, it honestly changed my mood watching it, made me more interested for sure.
8:37
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, because I just felt like whoa, like my people are in this movie, great.
8:40
SPEAKER_01: Like, yes, this is awesome.
8:42
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
8:43
SPEAKER_00: I I just thought it was so great.
8:45
SPEAKER_00: They they took liberty to just make it beautifully diversified, and it's true.
8:51
SPEAKER_00: The Regency era, if if you're gonna be true to the Regency area, you are limited in the diversity just of how geographically the world was at that time.
9:01
SPEAKER_00: And you know, by Regency again, we're talking about like 18, 18.
9:04
SPEAKER_00: It was a little ways back.
9:07
SPEAKER_00: Like we're yeah, we're talking way back.
9:10
SPEAKER_00: So uh I just I thought it uh it just was beautiful, and obviously um I can find myself in some of those older period pieces easily, but I also just like I loved uh just the beauty of what I saw on the screen and the fact that they they just like they just put people who could play those roles well.
9:31
SPEAKER_00: And and I don't know, I just fell in love with all the characters and but but to me it screamed of Enneagram.
9:40
SPEAKER_00: Like I was I was sitting there going, oh yeah, that has they have to be this type, they have to be that type.
9:46
SPEAKER_00: I was just I was like, I I was looking for my pen and paper in the theater.
9:53
SPEAKER_00: I was I resisted pulling out my phone and making notes.
9:55
SPEAKER_00: So anyway, right, right.
9:57
SPEAKER_00: I know you've made notes, I've made notes, I watched it again just to give a refresher.
10:04
SPEAKER_00: And we I have done my best to look up the names for everybody, both the character, and then just give nod to the actor and give him a shout out.
10:13
SPEAKER_00: And ultimately, there will be spoiler alerts in here.
10:16
SPEAKER_00: So I'm just warning everyone now again if you didn't hear it before, spoiler alerts.
10:22
SPEAKER_00: Um, but I highly recommend go rent the movie, go find it however you can and support just this great, um, uh just really well done, more indie film.
10:31
SPEAKER_00: Um, but but it's definitely worth the watch.
10:35
SPEAKER_01: I agree, definitely agree.
10:37
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so the big question is what character do you want to start with?
10:41
SPEAKER_00: And yeah.
10:43
SPEAKER_00: I want to start with the quote unquote villain.
10:47
SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, Julia Thisselwaite.
10:51
SPEAKER_00: I mean, what a mouthful.
10:53
SPEAKER_00: And she was played, she was played by the actress Zawe.
10:57
SPEAKER_00: Am I saying it right?
10:57
SPEAKER_00: Zawe Ashton?
10:59
SPEAKER_00: I actually don't know how I can't, I don't I've never seen that written, so I don't know.
11:03
SPEAKER_00: Okay, yeah, it's Z-A-W-E, but Zawe Ashton.
11:06
SPEAKER_00: I don't think I've seen her in anything before.
11:09
SPEAKER_00: She was fabulous.
11:09
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, me either.
11:10
SPEAKER_00: She was amazing.
11:11
SPEAKER_00: I agree.
11:12
SPEAKER_00: She played the role beautifully, absolutely.
11:14
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, okay.
11:16
SPEAKER_00: So, what are some of the things that you saw?
11:18
SPEAKER_00: What are you thinking?
11:19
SPEAKER_00: I definitely have my thoughts.
11:22
SPEAKER_01: So this was she was the hardest one to tie.
11:25
SPEAKER_01: That's why I wanted to give her first is to get her out of the way.
11:27
SPEAKER_01: She was the hardest one to tie.
11:29
SPEAKER_01: I think I landed on when I lost her character because I think there was a lot of redeeming qualities about her, and I really understood her.
11:36
SPEAKER_01: And I understand that, like, and I'm a one, but I understand the core and like that that belief and that understanding like in your core that you are special and someone else doesn't see your specialness or see your uniqueness, and being so insulted by like, I don't, like, I don't measure up to your whatever XYZ.
11:53
SPEAKER_01: Um I thought initially that she was a one.
11:57
SPEAKER_01: As I kept watching it, I was like, Oh, is she a four?
12:01
SPEAKER_01: I don't know what's going on.
12:02
SPEAKER_01: Like her character was really hard to pin down because I think she just encapsulated like that one four-seven triangle really, really well to me.
12:10
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
12:10
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
12:11
SPEAKER_01: I could see her in that tripod.
12:12
SPEAKER_01: I don't know specifically what number she would be, but I in that one four-seven I can see that.
12:18
SPEAKER_01: But I'm curious to hear what you have to say.
12:19
SPEAKER_01: I loved her character.
12:20
SPEAKER_01: I think my favorite scene in that movie in the movie was after um, what was his name?
12:25
SPEAKER_01: Um, Captain Ostery.
12:26
SPEAKER_01: Captain Ostery, yeah.
12:28
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
12:28
SPEAKER_01: After he saw her like be like be this essentially her villain moment, like her villain moment.
12:35
SPEAKER_01: And he saw that, he you know, said, like, you know, I'm gonna go back to the ballroom, you know, he let her feel her feelings.
12:40
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
12:41
SPEAKER_01: And then in my mind, I thought, oh, it's over for her.
12:44
SPEAKER_01: He's not gonna want her anymore.
12:45
SPEAKER_01: He's not like he's not interested anymore.
12:46
SPEAKER_01: And then he at the end he still like he let her, he still chose her, rather.
12:51
SPEAKER_01: And I think for me, that was like a oh, like she can be flawed as a one.
12:54
SPEAKER_01: You know, I'm struggling with this all the time.
12:56
SPEAKER_01: Um you can be flawed and still be desired and still be wanted.
12:59
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, wait, where on what planet is this true?
13:04
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
13:06
SPEAKER_00: Oh man, I love your take on it.
13:08
SPEAKER_00: And this is exactly why you and I did not swap notes ahead of time or anything.
13:13
SPEAKER_00: It was a real conversation.
13:15
SPEAKER_00: And if if you like this, I'm gonna put some uh links in the show notes.
13:20
SPEAKER_00: I've had other conversations similar to this about just my favorite movies and like Down Abbey, even and little women.
13:27
SPEAKER_00: So uh it's just something that, you know, as my Enneagram seven self, gotta I gotta do every once in a while, gotta get out of my system.
13:33
SPEAKER_00: But um I actually I'm gonna tell you a quote.
13:37
SPEAKER_00: And this is the quote that Julia says, again, this is she's one of the main characters, Julia Thistlewaite, the honorable Miss Julia Thistleweight.
13:45
SPEAKER_00: She says, somehow I will see that the honorable Mr.
13:49
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm receives exactly what he deserves.
13:52
SPEAKER_00: He won't get away with this.
13:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I remember that.
13:56
SPEAKER_00: So that and there was several nods to revenge, which had me thinking that she was an eight wing nine.
14:08
SPEAKER_01: Oh interesting.
14:09
SPEAKER_01: I would have never thought that.
14:11
SPEAKER_01: I I saw the revenge thing, but I felt like she I felt like underneath that it wasn't like this desire for power of control, it was a desire to be seen.
14:20
SPEAKER_01: The desire to be special, to be chosen, right?
14:24
SPEAKER_01: That was what I felt.
14:25
SPEAKER_01: And maybe maybe this is me projecting a little bit, but I think that's kind of what I saw underneath the the revenge.
14:31
SPEAKER_01: Because I think I'm as a one, you know, I have a tendency off to be revengeful, but it's not to be controlling.
14:37
SPEAKER_01: I don't know if it is.
14:38
SPEAKER_01: Maybe it is, but so I that that that perspective is so interesting.
14:42
SPEAKER_01: I love that as an a.
14:44
SPEAKER_00: Well, you know, and it's it's really funny because I think um I totally see where you're going with that.
14:53
SPEAKER_00: She was trying to, I mean, in in summary stuff, we're all trying to measure up to some standard.
14:59
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I agree.
15:00
SPEAKER_00: And she, and of course, any woman of that era, the only prospect is marriage.
15:07
SPEAKER_00: And that's constantly the list we're they're being held against.
15:10
SPEAKER_00: Unlike us, we have a lot of lists, not just marriage.
15:14
SPEAKER_00: Um, so I yeah, I I actually love the fact that you saw it maybe as a four or even as a one.
15:21
SPEAKER_00: And I mean, I think that's I think it's really interesting.
15:23
SPEAKER_00: For me, part of it was um, I think where I went was that she was more assertive the whole time.
15:32
SPEAKER_00: She was pretty consistently uh proactive, whether it was relationships or the taking action.
15:40
unknown: Right.
15:40
SPEAKER_00: Um, though I would give a nod to is that she did inadvertently in that whole process, she self-sabotaged in a way.
15:48
SPEAKER_00: And you know, and I know that the fours listening or those who love a four that know that that seems to be a recurring theme.
15:55
SPEAKER_00: So anyway, I don't know.
15:57
SPEAKER_00: I think I think I might have to go.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: All right, friends, watch it and tell us do you think is Julia an eight wing nine or four or you know?
16:06
SPEAKER_00: I I kind of I'm leaving the one to another character, another main character.
16:11
SPEAKER_00: Okay, but I love it.
16:14
SPEAKER_00: All right, we got the tough one out of the way.
16:16
SPEAKER_00: I kind of want to go to Captain Henry um Ussery.
16:22
SPEAKER_00: I think it is Captain Uh Henry Useri, just because you mentioned him.
16:25
SPEAKER_00: Um and he's played by Theo James, who's been an actor in Downton Abbey, actually.
16:32
SPEAKER_00: Oh my mom and I were going, what has he been on?
16:35
SPEAKER_00: What has he been on on?
16:36
SPEAKER_00: So we looked it up quickly afterwards.
16:40
SPEAKER_00: So okay, so I I'll just read this quote, and I don't have quotes for everybody, but this is I I did have a I would say this was my hard one because I wasn't totally sure.
16:52
SPEAKER_01: Um yeah.
16:54
SPEAKER_00: Um so he's having a conversation with Julia, and Julia says, I find this costume very out of character.
17:03
SPEAKER_00: They're at a masquerade ball.
17:04
SPEAKER_00: And then Henry or Captain Henry says, I'm not sure how to take that remark.
17:08
SPEAKER_00: Do you find me dull and spiritless, not manly enough for a swashbuckling adventure?
17:14
SPEAKER_00: And then as he again, spoiler alert, as he proposes to her, he talks about keeping her nasty habit in check.
17:24
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
17:24
SPEAKER_00: Which which is interesting.
17:26
SPEAKER_00: So where I landed, I was a little bit torn, and I see a strong wing either way.
17:32
SPEAKER_00: Maybe a five winged six because he tended to observe and then challenge.
17:37
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
17:38
SPEAKER_00: Or potentially six winged five because he was also like he showed a lot of loyalty through all of that.
17:44
SPEAKER_00: So those those were kind of my thoughts.
17:47
SPEAKER_01: That's so interesting.
17:48
SPEAKER_01: I I mean, I think I I was hard to type him.
17:50
SPEAKER_01: I don't think I even like attempted to, because I was just like, he wasn't on screen enough for me to.
17:54
SPEAKER_01: I think I'm realizing that character development is important when I'm typing someone.
17:58
SPEAKER_01: I feel like his character wasn't as developed as the other characters, unfortunately.
18:02
SPEAKER_01: But yeah, right.
18:04
SPEAKER_01: But I I can definitely see the the the loyalty piece.
18:06
SPEAKER_01: That part definitely was consistent for him throughout the entire thing was his loyalty.
18:10
SPEAKER_01: And I think also assuming that this was what was going on, but when he realized that Malcolm was also interested in Selena, he kind of like pulled back a little bit.
18:20
SPEAKER_01: Like he wasn't like a like a it wasn't there's no tension of like, oh, you know, this is my girl, and I have to, you know, win her heart.
18:26
SPEAKER_01: Like it was just like, okay, like bye, like, you know, interested in you, that's cool.
18:30
SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm not gonna force something that doesn't need to happen.
18:32
SPEAKER_01: I think that that's something that I've noticed with my five friends is that they're very much like cool, yeah, yeah.
18:39
SPEAKER_00: It's like he actually he even talks about he went to do research to follow his grandmother, who had been a huge part of his life, and his her kind of last letter to him was about, I would like you to meet this wonderful lady, um Alina.
18:55
SPEAKER_00: And so I just thought it was kind of interesting, even that nod too.
19:00
SPEAKER_00: He was gonna research this out, and as soon as he was kind of met with a roadblock, he was like, Oh, okay, I think uh I think she's getting together with someone else.
19:10
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
19:11
SPEAKER_01: I definitely can see that.
19:13
SPEAKER_01: Okay, okay, that makes it all right.
19:16
SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, 5.6.
19:18
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
19:18
SPEAKER_00: Uh those are again, you guys let us know.
19:21
SPEAKER_00: Tell us what you think.
19:23
SPEAKER_00: So, who do you want to talk about next?
19:26
SPEAKER_01: We can start with a main, one of the two main.
19:28
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
19:29
SPEAKER_00: I would love to.
19:31
SPEAKER_00: Do you want to tackle Selena or Mr.
19:33
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm?
19:34
SPEAKER_01: I think Malcolm is is interesting.
19:37
SPEAKER_01: He was an interesting character for me, a very difficult character for me, honestly.
19:42
SPEAKER_01: Ah.
19:43
SPEAKER_01: Why do you think because I think it was it's obviously layered, but I think his his like it was to me it was arrogant.
19:52
SPEAKER_01: His energy was very much arrogant, very much like I'm the prize, and like I'm the one who like everyone should be trying to like swoon and like you know, win.
20:03
SPEAKER_01: That just made me uncomfortable because like you are just a human being.
20:06
SPEAKER_01: You're just like the rest of us.
20:07
SPEAKER_01: Like, calm down, relax.
20:10
SPEAKER_01: It's okay.
20:11
SPEAKER_01: So I think that made me a little bit uncomfortable, but I think also, I'm not sure if you also typed him as a one, but I typed him as a one.
20:16
SPEAKER_01: And as a one I felt, I was like, oh no, is this what I look like to people?
20:23
SPEAKER_01: No, it was it was definitely hard to watch him because that was like I can see I can see a lot of my like internal person being like Malcolm.
20:36
SPEAKER_01: Um that was hard to like watch someone be that way on screen.
20:40
SPEAKER_01: But it's so helpful though.
20:41
SPEAKER_01: It's so helpful.
20:43
SPEAKER_00: It is.
20:44
SPEAKER_00: I I love that you wrestled with it, and it's so funny because I I would wholeheartedly, I mean, I think that was one of the things to me that it was ding ding ding, absolutely a type one.
20:54
SPEAKER_00: So I've always gone back and forth.
20:56
SPEAKER_00: Um all of a sudden I'm blinking on the the movie, but he's he's the lead character, absolutely a seven, and kind of just demonstrates because that's what a movie does, demonstrates the the downside, the pitfalls, the the low side.
21:15
SPEAKER_00: And so, but there's so much to learn from it, but it can make you a little uncomfortable.
21:19
SPEAKER_00: It can also move you deeply because oh my gosh, yeah.
21:24
SPEAKER_00: So tell me about that.
21:25
SPEAKER_01: Just maybe some of it that you were like, oh yeah.
21:28
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
21:29
SPEAKER_01: I mean, I cried so many times.
21:30
SPEAKER_01: Like, this is not a movie that you that would make you sad.
21:34
SPEAKER_01: This is not a sad movie at all, and it's very like even kill, like it's not that kind of movie, but I think yeah, just like it just affected me deeply to like watch him be so self sabotaging.
21:44
SPEAKER_01: Like, he really when he when he talked about like he when he talked about how like before he met Tina he was lonely, and like you now you have her, and like now you're gonna you're gonna let her go.
21:53
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, are you self sabotaging behavior?
21:57
SPEAKER_01: That like that fear of oh, I think this is this is one reason why.
22:00
SPEAKER_01: like really emotional was when I realized that like it's really difficult as a one to allow someone to get really close to you and that was what he was afraid of is that if he was to choose a suitor suitable person who was to say this is the person then they would have access to everything about him and they would have they would have a c a up close up close and personal look at his life and that is not fun for one because we we're we're we're just like so aware of our faults and flaws that we can hide it as long as you don't live with us.
22:29
SPEAKER_01: Like as long as you're not our best friend you're not you know our husbands or wives like as long as you're not that our person um the easy hide behind that.
22:37
SPEAKER_01: Um and when it comes like I think like all of this was just me like with him bringing out like when he was with Lena you could see him like all of his hard stuff coming out.
22:47
SPEAKER_01: All of his real issues were coming out with her.
22:49
SPEAKER_01: Like when he was um bad mouthing the cousin in front of her not knowing that was her cousin.
22:54
SPEAKER_01: Like this is like like this is what this is what ones do.
22:57
SPEAKER_01: Like this we do that we think that oh like what we're saying what we're doing is okay a lot of the time because we're like oh we're just you know we're just we're just trying to keep up here appearances we're just trying to be good or trying to do the right thing.
23:08
SPEAKER_01: We're trying to show up in a certain way and we don't realize how harmful that can be sometimes like I think with him like I wouldn't want to be friends with him.
23:16
SPEAKER_01: Let me say that.
23:17
SPEAKER_01: That's what I'm trying to say.
23:18
SPEAKER_01: I wouldn't want to be friends with him.
23:20
SPEAKER_01: Um and I I couldn't imagine yeah I'm okay I can I can feel his pain.
23:25
SPEAKER_01: Let me just I'll stop there.
23:26
SPEAKER_01: I I can feel why he's so hesitant.
23:29
SPEAKER_01: It made this very unattainable high standard of a list that no one could ever achieve that was actually blocking him from getting what he wanted.
23:37
SPEAKER_01: Like this standard is actually stopping him from the joy that he wanted was trying to like find so it's crazy.
23:45
SPEAKER_00: That's profound.
23:46
SPEAKER_00: You're gonna love listening to yourself share these words because there's some rich information here insights for ones in particular because there was a um there was a moralizing right and it it and just like that and this is where I wondered even the relationship between he and Julia as you know uh characters in the story she is an eight he is a one notoriously they both think they're right and and that rightness comes from different compulsions guttural instincts right but but from a different frame of reference and a different lens and and both for justice ultimately for quality for fairness right but um but an underlying motivations of one of being betrayed uh for an eight and the one to be found not good enough ultimately that that fear of of not as you mentioned measuring up even for a one so um anyway I I did I just appreciated uh how they developed that character and how at first I agree I think at first watching it I was like is is he the one we're supposed to be rooting for because I don't know yeah and it's so interesting that the way that Julia wanted to get revenge from like with my with Malcolm was to like show him like no you're not good enough.
25:15
SPEAKER_01: Like she was going to hit him below the bell like that is the worst thing you can do to a one is to tell them that they're not good enough.
25:21
SPEAKER_01: Yeah I mean honestly maybe maybe he deserved that maybe he I think he might have needed to like see that like what you're doing is actually unhelpful and harmful to people like I'm I'm guilty of not not being able to see that.
25:33
SPEAKER_00: So yeah that's a good point and in fact reminds me I've recorded the conversation with Jessica Betts for our first day of the summit coming up here and we talk about we kind of go straight for the juggler and she reminds us how we there there's bad news and the fact is that that fear that we have we're gonna encounter that fear those things are going to happen on this side of heaven but because of Christ we have hope and he comes in and fills those missing gaps.
26:04
SPEAKER_00: And so I yeah I kind of I think that's too where I I kind of love the fact that the story helps shape and bring health and life to you know to his character.
26:14
SPEAKER_00: So anyway again I we could talk so much about this but I I yeah I just love the development and all of that and and it makes sense to me why it would make you a little uncomfortable so right okay well now we gotta talk about the just stunning that's the best word I can I Selena the actress is Frida Pinto like come on like I as a as a fellow woman I'm just like you are gorgeous.
26:45
SPEAKER_01: No literally she was a great character yeah loved it loved it okay so what were your thoughts um I think my easy typing for not easy but like the the natural instinct that I had when I was watching was that he was a two okay um I think the work that she chose like was kind of two-ish um her like refusal to not be compassionate empathetic towards Malcolm even though her friend was like very much like forget him like very just because just because someone else was upset with him like she could see compass she could see b beneath things that I feel like a lot of twos in my life have been able to do for me is to see beneath the armor.
27:25
SPEAKER_01: They have a gift twos have a gift for sure um yeah I think that was that was my my assessment of it.
27:33
SPEAKER_01: I think she might have a one a one wing but yeah I'm trying to think of scenes that kind of solidified that for me but I'm curious to see to hear what you typed her as.
27:42
SPEAKER_00: Yeah so I'm on the flip side nine wing nine wing one but I could also see the eight only but I really went back and forth between the nine and the two and I there's someone else that I ended up picking that as a two and so that's maybe where I why I went with the nine one of the I just again I have a very small quote from gosh so many but and this could go for two as well but Selena says no one wants a person incapable of forgiveness for a friend.
28:14
SPEAKER_00: And she also speaks about hope.
28:17
SPEAKER_00: She has this beautiful uh conversation with Mr.
28:20
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm and they first meet in like the solarium or something uh away from the big event and it's just this beautiful back and forth um about what really hope should be in and the frame and reference.
28:35
SPEAKER_00: Part of it too is that I I kind of see how Julia leaned on her.
28:41
SPEAKER_00: Again this could be a nod to the two or two or the nine but Julia leaned on her to bring a sense of calm and peace to the situation and and to like make it help make it right and fix it.
28:55
SPEAKER_00: So I just I you know there was there was a couple of those I'm like yeah but I to I totally I kind of went I've gone back and forth between the nine and the two right I think maybe and this is the hard part about typing peop like typing TV show characters or movie voices is that for me it's so subjective.
29:13
SPEAKER_01: Like it's so subjective it's based it's it's typically based on my experience of the type in real life.
29:19
SPEAKER_01: And I think I've just never really had nines in my life be a Selena.
29:23
SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
29:24
SPEAKER_01: Like there twos are the Selena to me.
29:26
SPEAKER_01: I feel like nines just are not the people who I go to for like hope and support and peace.
29:31
SPEAKER_01: Not what I have typically done but I can I mean now you now just say I'm like oh wait why did I just I missed that.
29:37
SPEAKER_01: I completely missed that because I was seeing it from my like particular point of view and lens but I completely can see how she could she could be a nine actually I mean even her her willingness to just go along with this theme is super nine.
29:52
SPEAKER_01: Right.
29:53
SPEAKER_01: It's very nine I'm just like I would have a one no like you can't rope me into it's your no.
30:00
SPEAKER_01: But I feel like for that is that's like okay like I'm I'm just here to along for the ride.
30:04
SPEAKER_01: Not in a way that's like that like destructive or detrimental but like and then at the end she kind of reclaims her I don't know what the word is big movie but maybe agency and a time to choose to be with this guy even if her friend did not agree.
30:19
SPEAKER_01: Um yeah such good words I can see the nine I can see the nine there.
30:24
SPEAKER_00: Yeah and I think what you pointed out is exactly where why I landed on the nine is that she went along with something that she was uncomfortable with but she allowed her opinions and her feelings to merge with others.
30:37
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
30:38
SPEAKER_00: And I kind of see the eight come out there at the end where she pulls herself out even the high side of the three the idea of growth of where no I know what I want I know what is right I know what I need to do here.
30:51
SPEAKER_00: I have an opinion it matters and I'm going to be confident and comfortable with it courageous even with it.
30:58
SPEAKER_00: So that's that's kind of where I saw the development for her where at the first she's merging big time and then at the end she finds her voice in a beautiful way.
31:08
SPEAKER_00: Right.
31:08
SPEAKER_01: So yeah I think even I think I that should have been a signal for me because with the two the twos go to eight in stress.
31:15
SPEAKER_01: Yeah obviously you can go to it in both stress and growth but I think she didn't necessarily she went to two to to eight in growth.
31:22
SPEAKER_01: Like she went to it she tagged onto it when she was like no like I people are controlling me.
31:26
SPEAKER_01: Like people are controlling me I can't I can't do this.
31:29
unknown: Yep.
31:29
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
31:30
SPEAKER_00: Yeah I'm done I'm getting out of this crazy plan.
31:35
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
31:36
SPEAKER_00: Well it was again she just I think she also it was like this subtle stealing the show she didn't yeah she didn't go in there trying to make an entrance there was nothing lashy or showy or or trying to garner significance.
31:53
SPEAKER_00: That was kind of the the opposite and so that is as well I was going well you know she just she was she was actually way more comfortable playing in the background in a way a nine um a nine is traditionally more comfortable with as well.
32:08
SPEAKER_00: Right but I love that and I I actually thought I loved that like she essentially was the main character was played by a less assertive more just the what a nine embodies that that was yeah kind of the the featured character and there was something to me that felt a little bit magical of and why there's some Jane Austen um characters I think people love because that very reason where they're more of that nine um person too is just you know just sometimes a little unexpected from the heroine if you will exactly so that's very true that's very very true.
32:46
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
32:47
SPEAKER_00: I have a couple other random characters here that I thought were really fun to talk about.
32:52
SPEAKER_00: One that did play a little bit more of a role and I thought was was actually I I imagine this actor had fun playing this role potentially but it was Cousin Lord Cassidy otherwise known as Cassie okay what did you think about him?
33:10
SPEAKER_01: I liked Cassidy I liked him a lot.
33:12
SPEAKER_01: Me too I think he was an interesting character.
33:14
SPEAKER_01: I don't I think he did that he definitely played a role but I think his role was also in the background just a little bit totally but he was kind of I could I could see him being a helper.
33:24
SPEAKER_01: Yes he was totally a two-wing three right yeah like he was like helping move the chess pieces around but in a way that was like not manipulate I mean yeah twos can be have tendencies towards manipulation but I think he was doing it in a good place.
33:40
SPEAKER_00: Um I liked his character a lot I definitely like the character a lot I kind of wish that they gave him a love interest not gonna lie that was something I was getting for two yeah yeah I was too I was surprised they didn't um because he was just like the good friend to everybody and he was helping like you said kind of helping with all the different chess pieces if you will and he did kind of he did a couple of things that in the end because it was for good were slightly manipulative.
34:09
SPEAKER_00: Yeah explaining that there was a list for one then going you know being the go between that was terrible I know I suppose if it wasn't for him we wouldn't have a story but right um but yeah I did just see he was constantly oh just part of the plans part of the scheming in a way as just a a supportive team player a kind of a nod to that dutiful uh communication style that it fits a one two and six but especially I think I I saw him act like two.
34:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah and yeah I love that I love that because I think now that you know you kind of distinguish him and Selena I could see how his two-ness is more pronounced than hers is yeah it's way more pronounced than hers is for sure and I think even you and us kind of going back and forth between say Selena is she a two or a nine that I frequently talk to clients who are wondering between the two because there are a great deal of similarities.
35:18
SPEAKER_00: Especially if you're a female there's a lot of roles that you are placed in that you have to adopt either or you know position or personality you know just some ways that it can feel like oh what am I really so right and I think that's what makes so makes Cassie's character so powerful is that he's a male too.
35:38
SPEAKER_01: We don't really see a lot of male to in the T V on TV and he plays the male too very well where he's not and I mean there are parts where I like they like you anyway I'm not even gonna go there but like he he like he definitely had more of a softer um side to him like a less abrasive just like a very like he's like a and he he presented himself very opposite to Malcolm.
36:01
SPEAKER_01: Malcolm was very aggressive and kind of like you know like kind of like both like I don't know what the word is like just very puffed up and I feel like Cassie was very like low but in a very like good way.
36:14
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
36:14
SPEAKER_01: And that's a hard thing to say about a black man being aggressive and puffed up I apologize for the connotations that go behind that but that's kind of my perception of him I w on the on the in the movie.
36:25
SPEAKER_01: But Cassie just was completely opposite to him.
36:27
SPEAKER_01: Completely opposite to him.
36:28
SPEAKER_00: Yeah yeah no I agree I loved that I could see the two come out in a male lead role in that way I do think it's kind of hard to see there are so many men out there who are twos and don't know it um or you know or who are there but we don't hear those conversations with them as often but um I don't know I think it was a good description and you're right and and no insult taking I think you know again these are just characters they're static figures and you know reading lines and it's not really right their personage um and the beauty is that it's just a good example of character development like personality development right well I so I'm thinking there's like four more that would be one I have no idea so I'm gonna go to this one and it was Lady Kilborn um played by Donna Kroll or Donna Kroll and that is Mr.
37:27
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's mom and I love the actress she is so solid just her presentation and her way about her I think that was kind of a problem though because I think her she as a person as a human being kind of shown through and like played into the character.
37:48
SPEAKER_00: So she may have presented herself a little bit more than Lady Kilborn even and I just yeah I was just kind of curious of what your take was on it.
37:55
SPEAKER_00: Again she didn't have a whole lot of right right but um but she's also had some really solid solid lines and um throughout the movie.
38:04
SPEAKER_00: Yeah there's there's one line I do have so I'll throw it out to you again I haven't made any conclusions here but she says love cannot be planned so carefully that is part of its charm.
38:17
SPEAKER_01: I think the reason why Malcolm is the way that he is is because of his parents putting that pressure on him um and I think maybe his father is an eight or one because I think like you a lot of ones have parents who are either ones, threes or eights a lot of times.
38:33
SPEAKER_01: Not all the time obviously that's a huge generalization but um like that pressure is hard to like deal with but I feel like the mother the mother was either one of those three numbers or like a wing to a number that's on the side of it.
38:47
SPEAKER_01: So like if she was a one maybe she like draws on her two a lot.
38:50
SPEAKER_01: If she's a three maybe she draws on her th her two a lot.
38:52
SPEAKER_01: You know if she's an eight she draws on her nine a lot like I feel like she was one of those three numbers but she was drawing at least at the beginning she was she was the main number and then she was drawing a lot on her wing when she was when she realized that like wait my my son is in love.
39:06
SPEAKER_01: I don't want to be the reason why he doesn't get to be with this wonderful woman because I have the standard for him that's insane or crazy or you know anyway.
39:14
SPEAKER_01: Yeah I'm just not sure those are my those are my three guesses.
39:17
SPEAKER_00: Either she was a one wing two, three wing two or an eight wing nine yeah no I am right there with you I agree and the I mean I would maybe put her in the three only just because you know just for conversation sake I I actually see the wisdom where he felt the he would have felt the pressure he would have grown up under that um there was a there was a one scene that you could tell she really cared about presentation connection there was some name dropping or or name association that was really important.
39:54
SPEAKER_00: But I also think this quote potentially could capture the the growth um wherever she started at I think the quote is more indicative of of her saying like you said oh I'm gonna I'm going to sabotage my son's happiness if I don't point to the fact that of what is important here.
40:17
SPEAKER_00: So anyway I lovely lovely actress lovely character agreed I I want to hear what others think because yet to be determined those are our guesses okay so three more that I thought would be fun all of which one of them had fun just you just got glimpses of him throughout the film and that was John the Butler um which was he um the actor is Divian Ladwa and oftentimes he played kind of the comic relief throughout it.
40:59
SPEAKER_00: Exactly in a different way than another person put played comic relief that we'll talk about here in a minute.
41:05
SPEAKER_00: But I'm just kind of curious I threw a number out there it's kind of a silly reason but you know yeah I honestly didn't pay attention to him much I think because I think I was just having a lot of like big deep feelings about the movie in general that like anything that was not the main characters I was like I can't I I don't have the emotions I didn't really watch him intense like intensely if I if I watched it again I probably would pay attention to him a little bit more yes yes well I I will just give a nod to our Enneagram force he um yes there was some romanticism about him he sometimes wasn't paying attention right so there was like he like tuned into the romance of his people that he was taking care of he was very aware of what was happening in their love lives and right was excited to not he wasn't even gonna play a role but he was excited to observe it and to make note of it a really valid reason to like explain that numbers like I think there is yeah that makes a lot of sense that makes a lot of sense yeah continue my bad I interrupted oh yeah no he he ends up having his own little story which I think was cute yeah so they were coming up after the ball maybe was dancing with the other um I don't know what's going to call her yeah the other like Nate exactly exactly I don't even know her name yeah yeah and it was kind of a funny thing because you could tell his love interest was sort of keeping him in line um when he would get pulled into the romantic story and be in more intent on what was unfolding instead of what what his duties were or something.
42:50
SPEAKER_00: Right.
42:52
SPEAKER_00: Anyway we know type fours aren't only about romance but there was just something yeah something where he saw he saw what other people were missing and it wasn't to fix it but he saw the details the intricate details coming so there we go.
43:10
SPEAKER_01: I love that I wish I paid more I think I'm gonna watch again you gotta watch it again.
43:15
SPEAKER_00: Yeah yeah it's one of those that I'm like okay it's going on the wish list I'm gonna have to buy that one because I just got a kick out of it.
43:24
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
43:24
SPEAKER_00: Uh an actress that has I believe played a few things lately in a couple different movies out there Ashley Ginny Park and I is she a comedian I don't I feel like maybe she is or she's in anyway she played the role of Gertie or Lady Covington and just to set this up one of her lines one of the first lines miss this that's a mouthful um she just like she's full of energy very enthusiastic Very boisterous, not very aware of what's going on around her.
44:05
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
44:07
SPEAKER_00: Not at all.
44:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, she's not.
44:10
SPEAKER_00: So what number do you want to assign her?
44:13
SPEAKER_01: I think this was difficult.
44:15
SPEAKER_01: Because I I think that I think she was seven.
44:18
SPEAKER_01: I think she was seven.
44:19
SPEAKER_01: I think because she was scattered.
44:21
SPEAKER_01: I think I just I experienced and I've known like sevens to be very scattered and very like their energies in a lot of places and they're not very they're not typically a lot of sevens can't be composed, you know, sevens a go to one in growth or even stress, but um their natural tendency is to kind of like want to do everything and be everywhere and like like have their hand in every in every situation.
44:41
SPEAKER_01: I think that's kind of what I saw from her is like the scatteredness.
44:44
SPEAKER_01: Um was she the one and I know I don't I know what the character is, I do remember her face, I remember her what she was doing, but I think my question is was she the one who was married?
44:53
SPEAKER_01: She was married, widowed, and then married again.
44:56
SPEAKER_00: Yes, I believe so.
44:58
SPEAKER_00: And and that's funny because I didn't remember that part of it, but they meet at a like a horse auction.
45:04
SPEAKER_00: I think that's what's happening.
45:06
SPEAKER_00: And the place is sort of uh somber.
45:10
SPEAKER_00: It's not like a you know, it's a little bit more on the serious side.
45:13
SPEAKER_00: Mostly men are gonna be there.
45:16
SPEAKER_00: It's a social gathering, not a dance or something, but she comes in her full self.
45:23
SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, and she has like big, like iconic, flowery, I mean feathery.
45:28
SPEAKER_01: Think on her and I'm like, oh, I love this.
45:31
SPEAKER_01: Probably not the best time and place to be wearing it out of her pocket.
45:35
SPEAKER_01: But like it worked, she looked great.
45:37
SPEAKER_01: I didn't even notice that she was like quote unquote out of place.
45:40
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, show up how you are.
45:41
SPEAKER_01: She was she was a great character for sure.
45:43
SPEAKER_01: But I think that that that little detail of her having been married and then I think widowed and then married again, just like shows like I think I don't know what the what the word for this is.
45:53
SPEAKER_01: Resilience.
45:55
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that might be it.
45:57
SPEAKER_01: It's like there's something about her that draws you in that she will never be alone.
46:03
SPEAKER_01: That's true.
46:04
SPEAKER_01: Like, I think that's so so so beautiful.
46:07
SPEAKER_01: Like he has that that energy that's like you want to know who she is.
46:11
SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, definitely.
46:12
SPEAKER_00: And as a as a seven who have I've definitely had my um more immature moments over the years where I definitely I always squirm when that character comes out oblivious about everything else, just so excited, so in the moment, so enthusiastic to meet new people.
46:29
SPEAKER_00: That then looking back sometimes, which is rare, but I kind of go, Oh, I I maybe brought a little too much energy to that.
46:36
SPEAKER_00: And so Gertie's a fun comic relief, a little bit like John the Butler is and right, right?
46:43
SPEAKER_00: No, she's got a hilarious, very notable laugh.
46:47
SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, so that plays into it, but you can't you can't help but kind of go, Oh, she's fun.
46:53
SPEAKER_00: I like her.
46:54
SPEAKER_01: She's fun.
46:55
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, she's yeah, she's likable, she's definitely a likable character.
46:57
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
46:58
SPEAKER_01: Even though like she was making Julia feel bad about not being married yet.
47:04
SPEAKER_01: Like it was I I wasn't upset about her for that.
47:06
SPEAKER_01: It wasn't like the oh when we turn alone.
47:08
SPEAKER_01: It was like, oh, this is hilarious.
47:09
SPEAKER_01: Like, yes, it's fun to watch.
47:11
SPEAKER_00: She was sticking your foot in your mouth again and again.
47:15
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
47:16
SPEAKER_00: Oh man, I love it.
47:18
SPEAKER_00: Uh okay, so last but not least, again, Mrs.
47:22
SPEAKER_00: Thistleweight didn't have a ton of screen time, but she was a player behind the scenes.
47:28
SPEAKER_00: Naoko Mori is who was the actress who played Mrs.
47:33
SPEAKER_00: Thistleweight.
47:34
SPEAKER_00: Again, she's Julia's mom.
47:36
SPEAKER_00: She is kind of playing behind the scenes.
47:38
SPEAKER_00: There's probably different takes that we could take um with her.
47:42
SPEAKER_00: And you know, I just I'd be kind of curious what what you saw, what you observed, and um, because I I don't think I have a really solid one, I have a guess, but it's not not concrete by any stretch.
47:56
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
47:57
SPEAKER_01: I think I think same.
47:58
SPEAKER_01: I think I treated her the same way that I treated John.
48:01
SPEAKER_01: Um as like a I'm not, I can't pay attention.
48:04
SPEAKER_01: I'm not, I'm trying to figure out what I'm feeling and what's going on with me right now.
48:08
SPEAKER_01: Um I I didn't really notice and I think it was interesting.
48:10
SPEAKER_01: I think a lot of times mothers in general, not not my mother, but mothers in general can typically like try to force their daughters off into marriage.
48:18
SPEAKER_01: Um and I think I don't really think I saw her, and I mean maybe she did.
48:21
SPEAKER_01: I just don't remember her her mother being abrasive.
48:23
SPEAKER_01: I do remember the scene of her mom like suggesting that she should be with Captain Osari, and she was like, Oh mother, no.
48:32
SPEAKER_01: How can you even suggest such a thing?
48:34
SPEAKER_01: I think that part was interesting, but it wasn't like a forceful, like, oh like I'm gonna try to manipulate and bring them together kind of um like energy.
48:42
SPEAKER_01: She's kind of let things happen as they happen, and I don't know, I didn't I didn't really see her being or hear her being super judgy or super like you know at least from what I remember.
48:52
SPEAKER_01: When I remember, I don't remember that as being her person her personality, so I don't really know.
48:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
48:57
SPEAKER_00: The only the only nod that I could really find if we were gonna give anything was to the six.
49:04
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
49:05
SPEAKER_00: Only because uh just a little bit of the background story is that for her, it was really important for Julia to have a match because it was can provide security for the family.
49:18
SPEAKER_00: Because the husband, her husband has passed away, Julia's dad.
49:22
SPEAKER_00: So they they're on their own.
49:24
SPEAKER_00: And in those days, man, unless you were set up really, really well, usually all the inheritance went to some nephew or random person.
49:32
SPEAKER_00: It went, it wasn't left for the women.
49:35
SPEAKER_00: Um, and it would just be like her um trying to position Julia for security, but at the same time, ultimately, just I liked that too, where clearly she as the mom saw the potential in Captain Henry.
49:52
SPEAKER_01: Um again, for whatever reason, it could have been a number, but you know, that that was just kind of like, oh, well, you know, he wasn't a lord, he wasn't a, you know, he wasn't like a like a you know, he wasn't but he wasn't like the the money man, right?
50:06
SPEAKER_01: He was just like an honorable, like good, yes, good guy, captain of an arm, like that was his he was the normal guy.
50:12
SPEAKER_01: But I think for the mom to be so open to them being together was like different, so different from like typical period pieces and like just typical like mother daughter, mother daughter relationships in general.
50:23
SPEAKER_01: Um yeah, it's interesting.
50:25
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I haven't read the book, so I'd be curious reading the book if there's more of a development of even Mrs.
50:32
SPEAKER_00: Thistle Wait relaxing on that need to provide security, where she again, kind of like Mr.
50:39
SPEAKER_00: Malcolm's mom, where Lady Kilburn has this like, oh wait, but you can't plan love.
50:46
SPEAKER_00: Um you know, so I I'd be, you know, there might be more again behind the lines that we hear and we, you know, the the action shots we got to see.
50:54
SPEAKER_00: But the also maybe the steadiness piece, those elements that the dutiful personality types really often play well, those supporting roles, championing others' dreams and growth and balancing sometimes the extreme of withdraw or being way too assertive.
51:15
SPEAKER_00: Right.
51:16
SPEAKER_00: So there's there's sometimes where it's easy to think as well if they're playing a supporting role.
51:20
SPEAKER_00: You see some of those attributes come up naturally.
51:23
SPEAKER_01: Exactly, exactly.
51:24
SPEAKER_01: That makes sense, yeah.
51:26
SPEAKER_00: Well, I I've loved just having fun.
51:30
SPEAKER_00: I feel like I just getting to talk to a friend about a movie that I really enjoyed.
51:36
SPEAKER_00: I didn't know ahead of time how much that it had moved you.
51:41
SPEAKER_00: So I would I would just love to hear any last thoughts as you've maybe contemplated it some more or thought about it, or even as we talk about it again, the things that or maybe that thought that has come up to you that you'd like to share.
51:54
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
51:55
SPEAKER_01: Honestly, if I'm being completely honest, when you suggested the movie for me to watch, I was in a place where I wasn't open to watching romance movies anymore.
52:03
SPEAKER_01: At least not for that period of time.
52:07
SPEAKER_01: And I think watching the movie was so redemptive for me because it made me real.
52:11
SPEAKER_01: I think watching um Julia's character, even though even though I related a lot to Malcolm, watching Julia's character, like this is such a vulnerable thing to me to talk about, but I'm gonna talk about it anyways.
52:20
SPEAKER_01: The jealousy that she felt for her friend who was honestly had two suitors, right?
52:25
SPEAKER_01: Who had two people who wanted her.
52:26
SPEAKER_01: And she's like, he like she had gone season after season after season, not being chosen, and it's like, dang, well, what's wrong?
52:32
SPEAKER_01: Like, you know what I mean?
52:33
SPEAKER_01: Like, that's hard.
52:34
SPEAKER_01: It was hard for her to like watch her experience.
52:36
SPEAKER_01: Like, I remember not watching the movie feeling this like deep anxiety and like, oh my god.
52:42
SPEAKER_01: I don't like this.
52:42
SPEAKER_01: It's not a good feeling to feel.
52:44
SPEAKER_01: So I think that's something that I think honestly there's a lot of little pieces in the movie that made me feel very um just I don't know, like warm and fuzzy and tender.
52:56
SPEAKER_01: I love the scene when they um when Selena and Malcolm were dancing and like everything kind of stopped.
53:03
SPEAKER_01: Um that that that scene was the first time I cried in the movie.
53:06
SPEAKER_01: I was like, oh, this is beautiful.
53:07
SPEAKER_01: Like this is like I I felt so present.
53:10
SPEAKER_01: Like I feel like that that scene made me stop and just like watch and pay attention and not multi-past like I was doing before.
53:17
SPEAKER_01: And there's another scene where Selena confesses that she tells Julia, like, thank you for you know, thank you for your scheming because this is the first time I've ever felt like I've been in love.
53:26
SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, oh my god.
53:27
SPEAKER_01: The fact that the patch happened for her, like this horrible, not it's not a horrible situation, but like all this drama had to happen for her to find love, right?
53:35
SPEAKER_01: Like that was something that like I think about often, like, love isn't gonna come in this like perfect way that I think a lot of people want it to come in.
53:43
SPEAKER_01: Um, I was just I think it was just it's just the seasonal life that I'm in, it's the thought process that I'm in.
53:48
SPEAKER_01: Um a lot of it felt very personal and very much like God was speaking to me, like assuring me.
53:54
SPEAKER_01: Like, like I think Julia's ending was like God's like love letter to me almost of like you can be loved in your imperfections.
54:01
SPEAKER_01: You don't have to be you don't have to be perfect for God to send like true love, like love in in any form, like in friendship and like romantic partners, like whatever love you're looking for, like you don't have to be perfect in that.
54:12
SPEAKER_01: Um, I think Julia's ending just like threw me off the ground.
54:14
SPEAKER_01: Like I was like, wait, this is this happens in real life, is this real?
54:18
SPEAKER_01: Or just this movie love.
54:19
SPEAKER_01: Like I was that that was really special for me, for sure.
54:23
SPEAKER_01: Um so yeah, those are my thoughts, I think.
54:26
SPEAKER_00: Those beautiful thoughts are such a gift.
54:29
SPEAKER_00: I I was gonna apologize for making you watch this or being so forceful.
54:34
SPEAKER_00: And then, but I'm going, I you know, it was one of those I couldn't shake.
54:39
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I I felt a little bit like a bulldog about this because I kept having to tap you on Instagram like, Dial.
54:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I appreciate that.
54:51
SPEAKER_00: I you know, I I'm gonna say I'm gonna just take a jump as like a big sister in Christ going, I think that was the Lord because he likes to speak through the beauty of his creation, which is sometimes the art that has nothing to do with like bringing him glory necessarily, but there's still ways to bring him glory in it through us.
55:14
SPEAKER_00: And so um, thank you for sharing and allowing your honest thoughts.
55:20
SPEAKER_00: And I have this new way of looking at you and praying for you in a way of like going, oh, I'm gonna need to do some praying for my oh gosh.
55:36
SPEAKER_00: So uh, but I love it.
55:38
SPEAKER_00: I I think that's that's the gift too, right?
55:41
SPEAKER_00: We can all watch something and it can speak to us in a unique way, and and um, and we can have a wonderful experience in the end.
55:48
SPEAKER_00: Just like I hope this podcast episode has been to people a little bit lighthearted, just sitting in with us, having some coffee over Zoom or on your walk or whatever it is that you're doing.
56:01
SPEAKER_00: So thank you.
56:02
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for gifting us with this, with your presence, with your thoughts, and and not just thoughts, but your honest heartfelt feelings.
56:10
SPEAKER_00: So thank you.
56:11
SPEAKER_00: That's a gift.
56:15
SPEAKER_00: Well, what did you think?
56:18
SPEAKER_00: If you enjoyed this episode, I do have some similar podcast episodes themed around favorite movies and TV shows.
56:25
SPEAKER_00: And I, of course, as usual, I've linked them in the show notes.
56:30
SPEAKER_00: And as for Dayo, if you enjoyed her, I have great news.
56:34
SPEAKER_00: She is coming back for the second wholehearted Enneagram Summit and is sharing with those in attendance on the topic of Enneagram at work through the lens of black leaders.
56:46
SPEAKER_00: I just appreciate how she's using her voice to contribute to this conversation and making sure the Enneagram is truly reflective of life.
56:56
SPEAKER_00: If you haven't already signed up for this free summit, I hope that you do so now.
57:02
SPEAKER_00: Don't put it off.
57:04
SPEAKER_00: I would really love for you to join us.
57:06
SPEAKER_00: All the details, again, they're in the show notes.
57:08
SPEAKER_00: There's gonna be so many sessions.
57:10
SPEAKER_00: Everything from uh boundaries, marriage, faith, parenting, leadership, and more.
57:17
SPEAKER_00: So next week, I'm going to be sharing with you, just like I did last year, special excerpts of the Enneagram Summit.
57:26
SPEAKER_00: It'll be just a little clips of conversation that I think will whet your appetite for more and get you excited and give you context of what to expect from the 24, yes, over 24 sessions that are gonna be available beginning September 12th.
57:44
SPEAKER_00: Okay, I can't wait for you to join us.
57:46
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be so good.
57:47
SPEAKER_00: So don't put it off.
57:49
SPEAKER_00: Sign up and get your free ticket.
57:51
SPEAKER_00: And if you think you're gonna want to watch those sessions again and again, or if you want to watch them at your own leisure, go ahead and upgrade to the all access pass.
57:59
SPEAKER_00: You won't regret it.
58:00
SPEAKER_00: There are so many free bonuses and perks for getting the all access pass.
58:05
SPEAKER_00: All right, until then, continue to pursue God's perspective, purpose, and plans for your wholehearted life.