Latest / The Leader Mentality / Your Story Is The Legacy Someone Needs

Transcript

Your Story Is The Legacy Someone Needs · The Leader Mentality

• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Leader Mentality Show with Rob Clemens.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: We are on the air today with a special guest, and as I've always said, it's all about the community.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's all about helping others and inspiring others.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: And so anytime I can get a great person on here who I feel like is doing good things out there, I'm gonna jump on that with both feet.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: And today we have just such a person.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_00: I've met her a couple of times.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: She has a great fill to her as far as like where her spirit is.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't want to make you like feel weird about this, Gina, before you come on.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: So I'll just introduce you with her name is Gina Cassaza.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: Uh she is a speaker, she's an author, nonprofit founder.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: And uh so let's hear all about you today.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: What's going on?
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: Well, you know, Gina, you know, you and I met when I was doing a speaking event.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: You are good.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, well you are, and I could tell you're the way you're speaking right now.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, gosh, he has that speaker voice.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_01: You don't think the likes or the ums are in it.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_00: You know, after you do it for a little while, you start getting pretty good at it.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I've always been an ad libber, so I I try to just stay off of scripts and let's just get into the good stuff and and talk from the heart, you know.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: That's very cool.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: Gina, one thing that we talked about, and we're we're gonna really sprinkle in today, it's talking about leaving a legacy.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: And leaving a legacy to me is such a powerful thing because it's not just about you, it's about what you are leaving others to aspire to in some cases, and sometimes it's in making others better and and giving them a target to hit.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: So we're gonna talk about that today.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's gonna be really fun.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_01: That's one of my like themes of life is what legacy can I leave behind for not just the next generation, specifically my nephew, uh-huh, but that he would take when he raises a family, and then they take when they raise a family, for generations to come, you know.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, I think that's really huge.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: And we'll we're gonna dive into how to do that, how you've been doing that.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: And uh, but before we get into all that, tell me a little bit about yourself, what have you been up to lately?
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_01: Oh gosh, how much time do we have?
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, all the time in the world.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_01: So currently, right now, I I main my main focus is my nonprofit and power lit, literacy and beyond.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_01: That's the full name.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_01: What we do is we increase literacy in students while building self-esteem through author visits and literacy events.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: So my big goal for this school year is 50 schools to visit, 50 author visits.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: And then we want to do a literacy camp over the summer, just a week.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_01: And then by next school year, we'll have the next 50 schools, and we want to do a teen publishing company.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_01: So uh either a junior, senior, and I'm debating if I'm gonna open up to college, and they would come out with a book.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: Like they would either they have a book or they're gonna write that book and they're gonna work with a professional editor, we're gonna walk them through publishing, like how to be an author, like and how to get your book published.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_01: And once a month for the nine months that they're in school, they're also gonna be on a Zoom, and each month is gonna be a different theme.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: They're gonna meet with a professional marketer in the publishing business, they're gonna meet with a professional agent, and they're gonna have those, I guess, like group Zooms.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_01: So that's the goal.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_01: Obviously, I have to focus on the funding.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_01: The main thing is getting those 50 schools and getting that funded.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_01: Then I can move to the camp, and then I could go, okay, let's do the book.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm leaning towards two books for the first year.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_01: It's 15 grand a piece, so two books.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_01: So I feel like, you know, two books.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_01: And then we can work our way up to like five to ten books in terms of getting those kids their books, and not just they're not just publishing a book, they're gaining entrepreneurial skills.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_01: And for myself, going into okay, this is my focus, let's get to who I am, right?
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_01: It's I have always been someone that wanted to just experience life.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_01: Where when I was twelve, well, way, way back, um, not like way back, I'm only 36.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_02: You're right.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_01: But when I was like six, I wanted to be a uh archaeologist, and I like dug up my whole backyard thinking I was gonna find stuff, right?
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_01: And then like eight, I wanted to be uh the first female major league baseball player, so I wrote to the president and I joined a baseball team, and then at 12 I wanted to be a singer, and then I created a music video and I sent it out at 12 to Virgin Atlantic, like all these places, and then I ended up going to film business, and then I eventually landed there, and I decided okay, film is where it's gonna be.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_01: And I worked on shows like Dancing with the Stars, and I worked for I ran Penny Marshall's company for five years until she passed.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: I worked for Ralph Macchio, I did a bunch of stuff, and then I went into acting and stand-up comedy.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_02: Nice.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_01: Got an opportunity to open for Nick Swartzen, did a couple of shows with Waiting Cummings, a show with Jeff Ross, like it was great, it was fun, and then COVID hit, and LA was shut down because that's where I was living.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_01: And I decided to well, I went back to L I left LA for a bit, and then when I went back to LA, everything was still shut down.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: But they were giving us a lot of money.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_01: And when you have like too much money and too much time on your hands, like, you know, like it's just uh it's an interesting recipe.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: This is the age-old problem everybody's having too much money and uh that was what was going on.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_01: So I um did uh what I oh I looked at my mom because crime was like on the rise is in L in LA, right?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, and I was like, You think I could still rabbit kidnapping?
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: And she was like, No.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_01: Definitely not, right?
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, you answered that too quickly, think about it.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, I don't need to think about it.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_01: I see you, you can't do it.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: She's like, no, all five foot of you or whatever.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_01: No, five foot, no.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: And she was like, definitely not.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, there has to be a program where you get kidnapped, and they and they teach you, like, and and they put you through the test.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_01: So then I looked for that and I found it, and it happened to be a civilian sear course.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: You know anything about sear?
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_00: No, not really.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so sear is something that our special forces do in the military.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_01: Theirs is like, I believe it's 21 days or three, you know, um, but mine was just a weekend civilian.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_01: And what they do is they it stands for survival invasion resistance escape, and what they do is they give you survival skills, right?
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_01: And then at some point they kidnap you.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_01: And then they torture you for a number of hours, and then at some point you get to escape, and then you're hunted in the woods all night.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_01: And like, whatever you're wearing, you are like that's it, right?
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_00: Gina, Gina, you live a very different life than most people I know.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, what are you doing for fun?
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna get tortured and then it's a good idea.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_01: I say to get kidnapped.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_01: But it was like too much time and too much money.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, yes.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_01: So so I was like, okay, I'm gonna pay for this kidnapping thing because I my mom said no, I couldn't make it, and I was like, game on.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, right, right, right, right.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_01: But if she would have said, Yeah, you can do it, this my life, the nonprofit wouldn't exist.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, put it you that way.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_01: It's crazy how people motivate you, isn't it?
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it's like it's it's some people get motivated by, yeah, you can do it, and some people are like, you can't do it, and yeah, you're in that group at least.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, and then I well, here's the thing though.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: I start I joined, like, I was like, sign me up for the weekend course, and then I looked into it.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't even look into it.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: I just saw the word kidnapping, and I was like, came on, right?
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, right.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_01: Then I I found out it's what I explained to you, and I was like, She was right.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna make it.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: So then I was like, I just finished reading Living with a SEAL by Jesse Itzler.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: And for so obviously in my head, Navy SEAL.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, for sure.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_01: So I was like, I gotta find a Navy SEAL to train me for the next two months.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_01: End up finding this organization, this nonprofit called Team Eagle One.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_01: And what Coach Mac does, who's a former Navy SEAL, is he trains uh guys and girls to go through special forces, right?
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_01: And he specializes in in BUDS in particular, right?
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_01: And is and is the goal specifically to go into the military or just many of them are already enlisted in the military and they're in the pipeline.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: They want to get to that next level of elite group.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, guys.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: Well, the thing that people don't understand is that they just think you could sign up and go to BUDS.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, right.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_01: It's a privilege.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_01: There is a whole long thing that you have to do in order to get that opportunity to go to BUDS.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_01: So what so most of them are in that pipeline getting ready to go, right?
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_00: Fair enough.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_01: And I was civilian and I messaged him and I'm like, I just paid to get kidnapped.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_01: Can I just one day?
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_01: I just I won't interrupt your program, I promise.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_01: I just want to know if I could at least make the day.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_01: He was like, if you pay to get nab, like please, I have to meet you.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_01: Come on now.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right, right.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_01: So I show up and I see them, and they look like real G.I.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_01: Joe action figures in the flash.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: You know, oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_01: So I walk away.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, no, I can't do this.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: And then I was like, Gina, if you want to survive this kidnapping, you have to do this.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_01: You have to.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_01: So I mustered up the courage, I said hello, and then boom, game on.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_01: It started.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_01: And then I wanted to quit seven times in the first minute.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't think I was gonna make it.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_01: I was miserable.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: I was the last in all the runs.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: I struggled so much.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_01: It was the worst thing I've ever, like the hardest thing, the worst thing.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_01: I looked around and I'm like, these people find this fun.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, right, right, right.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_01: And then I made it, didn't quit.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: Day one, didn't quit.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_01: Now it's just supposed to be one day.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_01: This is very important.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_01: Coach Max said something, and he said he's never said this before.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: So I don't know how this happened, but again, without this, now we wouldn't be here.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: He was like, if you think day one is hard, try day two.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_01: Because your mind is gonna give you every excuse not to show up again, and every excuse will be logical.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_01: That's what's gonna make it so hard.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, that's amazing.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, okay.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_01: Mike drop on that one.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_00: For sure.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: So then I come up, go up to him, and I was like, listen, I'm here for the hard.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_01: I have to come back for day two after what you just said to come back.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_01: And he was like, We'd be lucky to have you.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: And people listening are like, yeah, you wanted your money.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_01: It was a non-profit, it was a free program.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: He could have said no.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, of course.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: Especially because I'm civilian, and he was like, We'd be lucky to have you.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_01: So him saying yes, me going back to day two, he was right.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: Every excuse for because first of all, my body felt like it got hit by a truck for three days, right?
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: Right, right.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: I couldn't even move.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: And then when it was time to go, like my brain was like, You're not trying to be an AVCEO, like all these logical excuses came up.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_01: But I showed up, and then I showed up the next time and the next time, and I ended up in that program up until I went to SEER.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_01: The Civilian SEER program, crushed it at SEER, and then went back and continued and like continued with them until I moved from LA.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: While I was in there, this is what I learned that sparked the nonprofit and what I teach in kids right now.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_01: Now I learned that way back up a second.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_01: So for the last almost six for the first six weeks, I was first four weeks, I was last in all the runs.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_01: I couldn't even do a pull-up.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_01: I was terrible.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_01: The fifth and sixth week, every once in a while I'd be with the pack in the middle of the pack.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_01: Every once in a while wouldn't always be last, okay?
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: Then towards the last two weeks, that's when the light bulb came off, and I was like in the front a little bit, and I this light bulb went off in my mind.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_01: That was like, Gina, you're never gonna fit in with this group.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: They've been trying to fit in, trying to fit in, trying to fit in the whole entire time.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_01: And they didn't ostracize me, they didn't, they weren't mean to me, they didn't tell me I didn't belong, they didn't tell me to go home.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_01: It was a mental thing.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: It was a I feel it's an insecurity, right?
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: This is within you, not within them.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_01: I feel like I don't belong because I'm not good enough.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_01: Sure, sure.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, that's what it comes down to, right?
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_01: And as I started to get good enough, you know, not all the time, but you know, I was like, you're still never gonna fit in.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: And then this light bulb went off, and I was like, fitting.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_01: I learned in that moment, this light bulb went off as I was running with a pack.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, belonging and fitting in are not the same thing.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: We are teaching kids that belonging and fitting in are the exact same thing.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_01: So no wonder I feel like I don't belong with the group because I don't feel like I fit in, right?
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'm taught that fitting and belonging are the same.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_01: And this is where I struggled in life because ever since I was like seven, I had so many friends, I was involved in so many activities, but I always felt like an outsider, like I didn't belong, right?
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_01: And it was because I always felt like I needed to fit in, but I never felt like I fit in because even though I might we might look similar, right?
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't think like everyone else.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_01: I always dress a little edgy and different and stuff.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_01: So I always stood out and sometimes I always wanted to stand out.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_01: I always wanted to be different.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: So in that sense of I've always wanted to not be like everybody else, I ostracized myself where I always felt like I didn't belong, right?
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, okay.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: Because we're teaching, also it it's the same, right?
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but it's just funny though, because we're also teaching kids that they need to be themselves, right?
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_01: But then we're we're teaching them that fitting in and belonging are the same thing.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: So can you understand how a 13-year-old, a 10-year-old, a seven-year-old, a 16-year-old is gonna feel?
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: Like you're giving them two totally different messages.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: Can I break in with a quick thing here?
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_00: Uh you know, I had this interesting epiphany, uh, which is along these lines, mixed messages that we give to kids.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I experienced this when I was growing up.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_00: And it was one of these things where my dad would uh half the time he would say, You care too much what other people think.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_00: And then the other half the time he'd say, You need to care more what people think.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: It was it's the most bizarre thing.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_00: So here I am as a kid growing up.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_00: It's already hard enough.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_00: And then you're like, wait a minute, do I care too much or not enough, Dad?
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not I'm not sure what to do anymore.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: So so again, these are these mixed messages.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_00: They can make it hard enough when you're growing up.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: So okay.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: 100%.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_01: And then this light bulb went off where I was like, they're opposites.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_01: Because now think about this, and this is what I teach the kids in elementary school to get them to understand.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_01: You place you ever play a sport?
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_01: You ever wear the wrong jersey?
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_00: It's happened, I'm sure.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_01: You did not fit in that day.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_01: Because everyone's gonna point you out.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_01: The kid with the wrong jersey, right?
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, yeah.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_01: Didn't mean you didn't belong to the team.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_01: So, how can belonging and fitting in mean the exact same thing when I just gave you that, right?
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: Good point.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_01: So I realized I was never gonna fit in with them.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_01: First of all, I'm female, okay, five feet tall, under 100 pounds, like all these things, like I was a last all the time.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_01: Like I just didn't fit in.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_01: But that didn't mean I didn't belong to the team.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_01: That didn't mean I didn't belong there.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I learned that fitting in means changing yourself if you're part of a group.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: Gotcha.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_01: Belonging means you just have to show up as your authentic self knowing you're enough.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: Nice.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: I like that.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, very cool.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_01: And when you can know you belong, you then can have a different opinion than everybody else.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_01: You can dress how you choose, right?
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_01: You can be on your skill level, right?
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: You don't have to worry about being someone you're not, you just have to embrace who you are, knowing that you still belong.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_01: So you can be with the team, but you can also be your own individual.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, well, you you use a perfect example.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, look, if we had a football team comprised of everybody that was playing quarterback, the whole team is full of a quarterback, you would uh quote unquote fit in really well, but you actually may not even belong that well in that case.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_00: You know, there there's an interesting thing that happens.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_00: So if you can learn to uh appreciate the diversity within you of whom you are and who what you bring to the table, then you actually could be a better fit for them than all the people who are trying to follow along and be the same exact carbon copy of each other, right?
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_01: A hundred percent.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: I got you.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: I like it.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: So then, so that was like the second to last week of me leaving this program, like finishing up this program.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_01: And then that last week was a Sunday, it was the last day of training.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_01: I was officially leaving Los Angeles that week.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_01: And it was my last day, and I said to them, You guys taught me what it means to belong.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_01: Tomorrow, I'm going to Joshua Tree National Park, and I am going to write a children's book on belonging.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_02: Nice.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_01: For a seven-year-old me.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: And I went to Joshua Tree, no technology.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I had technology, but you know, it doesn't work, which is great.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_01: But four hours I wrote my children's book, You Really Truly Do Belong.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_01: Year and a half I published it.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_01: Took me because finding an illustrator, learning how to be a publisher.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't pay somebody, I did the whole thing.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_01: I went through the whole journey of learning how to self-publish and all that stuff.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_01: I created an animation for the book, all this stuff.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_01: And then the book launched, and at that time I was on Long Island, and then schools were hiring me to come speak to their kids because they were like, we need this message in schools, and we also need to get them excited about literacy.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_01: So we do these author visits, and you have a great message.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_01: Come.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_01: So I'd come and they paid me and they'd buy books, and I was like, this is a career.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_01: This is what?
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_01: This is I didn't know this.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_01: Then I moved down to South Carolina and I was like, I'm gonna do the same thing.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_01: And then I got a lot of pushback.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_01: We don't really do author visits, we don't have the budget, it's too much for us, we don't have the time to put this together.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_01: And then I said, Okay, well, what if I get you guys a grant?
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_01: I get you a grant for your school, bring me in.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_01: And they were like, Oh, okay.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_01: And then I got them a grant, and I think they were just shocked I get them a grant, I got them the grant, and then they were like, um, I still have to fill it out and stuff.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_01: This was too much.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_01: And then I said, Okay, what if I started a nonprofit?
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: What if I started a nonprofit, got grants, got funding, and I could then go to the schools to teach this program to do an assembly, get the kids not just excited about literacy, but also build their self-esteem at the same time.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_01: And they were like, Yes.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, perfect.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_01: And here we are today.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_01: It took what almost 30 minutes to get here.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_01: But this is where we are with how I started the nonprofit, how I ended up being an author, how I ended up writing this book, and then next thing you know, you turn into a speaker because first of all, I really believe that if you could speak to middle school and high schoolers and get them excited, your your goal is.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_00: That's a that's a skill beyond all skills.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_01: A friend of mine is just getting into speakings at schools.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, what age group?
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_01: And he said, Middle school, high school, how should I practice?
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, just turn to the wall and talk to the school.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, right, right.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna tell you, you know, as a guy who's spoken to all age ranges, high school, college, middle school, and all, it it the hardest group is that, like, I'm gonna say they're between the ages of 10 and 16.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_00: That is a tough group right there.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_02: Tough group.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: And they're not that easy between 16 and 20 either, by the way.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I just want to be honest, because I taught to Coastal Carolina at least once a year.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm always like, there's those couple who are ahead of the curb and they're following everything you're saying.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_00: The rest of them, you're like, you're working hard.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_00: Might be a beat of sweat coming down from my face at that point.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, you got so many cool things here.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_00: I've got to go back and now we're gonna start talking some questions, okay?
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: One thing you said a minute ago, and I want to make sure I heard you correctly.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_00: Did you say you wrote that book for seven-year-old you?
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_00: Did I hear that correctly?
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: Correct.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: So tell me about seven-year-old you.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_01: Seven-year-old me just struggled to feel like she belonged, right?
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_01: I was just trying to fit in, but then I was trying to be my own person.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_01: Always wanted to be my own person.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_01: I always wanted to.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_01: I never wanted to the best way to say it, there is this photo, and I remember it from childhood because I always had it with me.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_01: And it was all these people that looked exactly the same.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it was like a blank face, it didn't have a face or anything.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_01: It was a blank face with a black shirt, and everyone was standing and looking the same, and then right in the middle was someone with a red shirt.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: And I always had that because that oh, I always like that's who I wanted to be in terms of my own human being.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_01: I did not want to change myself.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_01: If you wanted me to do something that I didn't want to do, I wanted to be able to look at that photo and be like, be the person you want to be, that individual, stand out, don't just fag it in, right?
• 20:51
  SPEAKER_01: And yet, I'm taught from society that fitting in and belonging are the same thing.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: So we have this disconnect.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: So, yeah, I had so many friends and I wasn't part of a so many different groups.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_01: I was involved in so many things.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_01: From the outside, you wouldn't know that on the inside I was struggling.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_00: Man, it's powerful.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, we and we have to remember, you know, even as adults, how challenging life can feel.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_00: But for a kid, when you're finding out where you fit within the pecking order, you're figuring out where you fit in the social norm and constructs.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: You feel like you should be doing something that you really you're saying, being your most authentic self can actually be a lot more um, I guess, healing and and all those positive things that come from life.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: That's really powerful.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I appreciate that.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: We got so many things I'm gonna have to kind of like jump.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_01: One out of three kids feels like they don't belong.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I mean I'm trying to combat that one.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_00: I can't I can imagine that.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_00: And it's probably one out of three, it might be higher than that when you really dive in, because sometimes kids might not even be honest when it's coming down the island.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_00: I get I get you.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um so we get into the challenges of literacy.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_00: I'd I'd like to hear more about that because you you've made this a platform.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_00: We hear it a lot, especially in a place like South Carolina.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: Um, if you look at it from a school system, and by the way, I'm very respectful of Orey County school system, local schools.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: Uh whenever I talk like I'm about to talk, I don't want it ever to sound like I'm challenging in that way.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: But if you look at South Carolina, for example, in the ranking of schools throughout the country, it doesn't rank in the top 10 or anything.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: Let's leave it like that.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's 38.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_00: It's 38.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, like so let's go straight to it.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and the idea is that there's a challenge already with that, and uh then we have paired along with that the literacy challenge, which is nationwide, right?
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: Tell me about that and and why did it get this bad in your estimation?
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_01: I can't tell you why it got this bad because I just got here.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: J in general, though, like maybe even countrywide.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: Why are you seeing this?
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_01: I can tell you many different, I guess the the hypothesis that I have, right?
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_01: In terms of first of all, the national reading scores came out, and 30%, this is nation, not just South Carolina, read at grade level.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_01: 30%.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_01: So you're a business owner.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_01: Think about the people that are gonna be applying for your for a job to work for you in the next 10 years, if 30% of them read at grade level.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's crazy.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's a concern.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_01: We have focused on testing and only testing and not allowed creativity, we not allowed um what was it?
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_01: One school I listened to in South Carolina, they they took away recess to have more to focus the kids more testing and and learning and stuff like that.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_01: And I just think when we can learn to make learning fun, the reason why I say I don't teach your child how to read through Empower Lit, we get your kid excited about reading.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: Because if I could get your kid excited about reading, I don't have to teach them your job is a lot easier in terms of also let me ask you, are you a parent?
• 23:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, I have no kids.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: I got nieces and nephews.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_01: Do the any most of the people they don't sit down and have dinner together as a family.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's a two-parent household that are working.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_01: They're tired, right?
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_01: They might not be sitting down and reading with kids at night before bed.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_01: My mom always did that.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_01: She sat with us and she read with us all the time.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_01: We had speakers at my school.
• 24:19
  SPEAKER_01: I had Shell Silverstein come to my school.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_01: Still have his book he signed.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_01: We also had other speakers that came to our school.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_01: I remember like there was a guy from jail, there's a guy from ALS, and they like really made an impact, but I still remember them.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_01: So I think we need to get rid of because what's happening right now isn't working, right?
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_01: So why not try something different?
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_01: And why not get kids to be more creative?
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_01: But I it's also really hard because if I was on their side, it'd be like, well, we have 30 kids and it's really hard to corral, and then one kid is, you know, acting out, and then it takes me 20 minutes to get the class back to focus, that's hard.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's not easy right now in either direction, right?
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: And and what I want to do is I just want to make it a little bit more inspiring because if you can motivate and inspire a child, and also if you can build their self-esteem, and let's talk about self-esteem right now, because we're living in a digital, this is the first time that kids are growing up in that digital era, right?
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_01: We've never witnessed this before.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_01: Sure, sure.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_00: Gin Gin Zers have grown up with it.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_00: Sure.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so how do you think a 12-year-old feels when they're on a phone and they're seeing all this amazing stuff from people in their uh friends of theirs going on this vacation and that vacation and they can't go on a vacation, right?
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_01: Or this is happening.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_01: And the thing is, let's be real, people don't really show their their failures or their hurts on social media.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_01: They're showing their wins, their successes, their highs.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_01: And kids can't understand that.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_01: And then you get those keyboard warriors, right?
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_01: So we have this, I just want to be love because that's a human being, it's human nature.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_01: I just want to feel like I belong, human nature.
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_01: We're social beings, right?
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_01: And we are also not teaching them any communication skills.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_01: They're standing behind a phone.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_01: How many parents are ordering for their kids?
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_01: When I was a server 15 years ago or 10 years ago, if a parent or if a parent didn't order for their child, a child ordered for themselves, I went and got them a dessert on the house because it was like once a month.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I worked in a diner where there were kids all the time.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, for sure.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_01: How many parents are doing things more for their kids versus you know, and and the schools don't want to fight.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_01: Why would they?
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_01: I don't want to fight with you.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_01: I don't want to fight with this parent who's, you know, they're just uh what's the way, uh putting kids in the next grade that aren't ready to be in the next grade as well, right?
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_01: And it's just it's hurting.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I think we need to really re-evaluate everything.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_01: And I will say I've noticed in South Carolina because I think fall this fall we're hitting between 15 and 20 schools between October and November through Empower Lip.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_01: They're all in South Carolina, and these schools were open.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody I called and I said they're like, we want this program, we love it, and they're sharing it around.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_01: So I will say they are very open to this.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_01: To receive in this to receive they seem this way because I haven't had pushback or anything like that.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_01: Now, when you go to the higher-ups, that's when there's more red tape, there's more pushback and things like that, where the superintendent might not be as receptive as me just going to the principal, and the principal's like 100%.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, well, you know, there's naturally new things are always going to be a challenge.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_00: Very cool that you're making that headway, making that progress.
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_00: So well done with that.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, you used a a word a while ago that I think is very important, and I think it's important for kids, I think it's important for somebody who wants to be a business owner, I think it's important for anybody who's gonna put themselves out there in a place where you can be judged, and you said you had to like dive into your courage.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: You said you had to actually apply some courage, and it was in the in the sense of you know how you have to go for things sometimes that they're not that easy for people.
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, use courage when you're doing something that's not natural to you.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_00: Tell me about yourself.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_00: Have you always been a courageous person?
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_00: Is this something that you developed over the years?
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: How did you get to that point?
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_01: I think it was a mixture between my parents and myself because I've always I remember I was, I believe it was 10, and I was doing this thing called Nisma.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_01: Anyone that's in New York knows it because it's New York State music, something.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_01: And I was playing the piano for a judge, and you spend a year practicing a piece, and then you go one-on-one with the judge and you play.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_01: And they grade you.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_01: And in the middle of my piece, she's like, I gotta stop you right here.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_01: Ten.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, smaller than I am now.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_01: And she goes, Is your parent?
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_01: Do you have a parent here?
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, Oh, my mom, and she says, Can you get your mom?
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I have to go out in the hallway.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_01: And by the way, it's like packed.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_01: It's packed with students and parents.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_01: Now I have to go out there and ask for my mom who now has to go in, which by the way, doesn't happen.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_01: The kid goes in, the kid goes out.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_01: The parents don't go in.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_00: What's this all about?
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_01: Parent comes in and they're like, She doesn't know what she's doing.
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_01: The plate piece is a mess, it's not very good.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_01: And it's better that I grade her as a participant, not on an actual grade.
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_01: And so I leave, I get into the car, and that's when I start crying because I was like, I'm not gonna let anyone see me cry.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_01: And then I get into the car, and I'm like upset, and my mom was like wanting me to also go to a friend of mine who's a piano teacher, a friend of mine's mom who's a piano teacher, and be like, play for her and let's see what's going on, right?
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_01: But before that, as we're driving to go to my friend's mom's house, she my mom was like, if you don't want to do this again next year, you know, you don't have to do it again because it's It's I put myself in there.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_01: No one made me go in there.
• 30:04
  SPEAKER_01: It wasn't a thing.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: I put myself there.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, no, I'm going back next year.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_01: And I hope to get the same lady and I'm gonna play the same piece.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_01: And I did.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't get the same lady, but I played the same piece.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_01: But the thing was I think it was just nervous because when I went to go and play for my friend's mom, it was fine.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, No, it's good.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_01: I think it was just nervous.
• 30:22
  SPEAKER_01: So also, I think also leading up to that is my parents cultivated a no quit, also be resilient mindset because ever since I was like five years old, I would have to call.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_01: Like if we couldn't make it to a birthday party, and my mom was like, call and let them know we can't make it, you have this other thing, right?
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, well, the other parents call.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_01: And she's like, Well, I wasn't invited to the party, you were invite, right?
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_01: And I would like have to call and be like, you know, and then she would always call the mom to let them know.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_01: Like, but it was a way of her to get me over that I don't want to call, I don't want to speak, I don't I'm nervous.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_01: I was a child, by the way, which is funny because I'm talking this whole time, but that didn't really talk.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_01: I was very shy.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_01: And my parents were always pushing me to do things out of my comfort zone, and I would fight them all the time, and they wouldn't have it.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_01: And they also had a thing where like you weren't allowed to quit until the end of the year.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_01: So if you were part of the team and you just didn't like it, well, too bad, you're part of the team.
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_00: You committed to it, right?
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_00: Committed to it.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_01: And so they taught me all that stuff.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_01: So because of that, I think that also cultivated that get out of your uncomfortable.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_01: And I will say, like, it never gets easier.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_01: When I decided to be a stand-up comic and I got up on stage and I did my first set, yeah, it never gets easier, right?
• 31:45
  SPEAKER_01: Really?
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_01: It just doesn't.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_01: It's unjust you, just kind of embrace it.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_01: Like you just you embrace the whole like uncomfortable where it suddenly becomes comfortable.
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, okay.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_01: But every what I'm saying though on when it doesn't come easy is that like everything that I attempt is a new discomfort, right?
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_01: Being an author, new discomfort, right?
• 32:09
  SPEAKER_01: Joining the Navy Cell program, new discomfort, right?
• 32:11
  SPEAKER_01: Stand-up comic, new discomfort, a nonprofit, new discomfort.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_01: I have a plushie company.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_01: We just I just decide to do a whole new marketing campaign for it, whole totally out of the comfort zone.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_01: But the thing is, is like I am willing to take risks and be out of my comfort zone just because I'm comfortable within myself and I know that I belong.
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that's really what it comes down to.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_00: All right, that's a full circle right there.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_00: I like it.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 32:37
  SPEAKER_00: Well, you know, it is important.
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um, if you're out there, you're listening, you're a viewer, um, the getting into the uncomfortable areas is the place where you grow.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_00: Um if if you stay in the things that you're most comfortable in, uh, you're like a car on the highway.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you're you're you the your the treads on your tires are a certain way, and you just have a way of certain get in that groove where you just can't get out.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_00: So get in those uncomfortable areas.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_00: You've made a life of it, which is really, really interesting and very cool, very commendable.
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_00: Um so I I want to talk about a couple of things.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_00: We have about three or four minutes left.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_00: All right, so let's talk about a couple.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_00: This is a great.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_00: Um so when you are dealing with kids a lot, yes.
• 33:18
  SPEAKER_00: Uh you have kids of your own, I said?
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_00: No, sir.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_00: You have no kids either.
• 33:21
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_00: So here's my question.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_00: Have you always been a kid person?
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_00: So this isn't like you're a person who's like, I just love being around kids.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_01: Now I do.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_00: You do now, but you didn't mainly because I have a nephew.
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_01: But he's three and a half, he's gonna be four soon, but he changed my life.
• 33:38
  SPEAKER_01: Like so, after you really truly do belong, is now you really truly are enough.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_01: There wouldn't be a second book if it wasn't for him.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_01: I dedicated the book to him, I put him in the book, and I'm trying to teach him these limited beliefs that we all have.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_01: I don't belong, I'm not enough.
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't I want him, I want to combat that before it happens, right?
• 33:56
  SPEAKER_01: So literally my nephew is my whole entire life, and it also gets me to like more around kids and and everything like that.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_01: So I grew up not a kid person.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_01: I always was like, I'll probably never have kids.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_01: I was always very career-focused.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_01: Priorities have changed.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_01: Um, especially as a female, like in her 30s, it's like priorities really changed.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_01: Clock is ticking.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_00: No, I well, you know, but but I think it's very cool.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_00: You look at the progression of life for people, and the message for me with leader mentality, it's always been the same.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_00: I want people to understand you're you're not alone in the way you feel.
• 34:36
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes you feel like the world is against you, and it's like it's something that within you, you're like, man, everything's bad happening to me, or whatever may be the case.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_00: And the message to you are you are unique, you are special, but you're also experiencing things that a lot of people feel like, and you don't have to be alone.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_00: And so when you're a kid, it it's very hard to understand that.
• 34:56
  SPEAKER_00: I think as you get older, hopefully your wisdom takes you to a point where you say, It's actually normal to have some setbacks, it's normal to fail at something, and that's okay too.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to be a superstar with everything you do, but keep trying, put yourself in those discomfort areas.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 35:10
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, Gina, let me talk about just a couple more things, really important to me.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you talked about the resilience, okay?
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_00: Resilience is is so important and passion because I when I talk to college students, I always tell them the same thing.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_00: If you don't have a passion for what you're doing, when you get to that point that it stinks, and by the way, every job, every business you start, every team, there's gonna be a part that sometimes doesn't feel great, right?
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but if you don't have a passion for it, a lot of times your natural thing is gonna be, all right, I'm gonna quit.
• 35:42
  SPEAKER_00: And it's interesting because you've gone against the grain of that.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_00: You say, hey, I'm gonna see through what I do.
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_00: But my message is with the resilience is you have to keep pushing, you have to keep going.
• 35:53
  SPEAKER_00: What is within you?
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_00: What would you tell people who are feeling that thing right now?
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_00: They're feeling some resistance.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_00: What would you tell them to help inspire them to keep going?
• 36:01
  SPEAKER_01: I would say you gotta fight that resistance.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_01: You have to, because motivation does not drive action.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_01: You know, the usually it comes after the action.
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_01: You do it and then you get motivated to continue, right?
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_01: But what you need to learn how to do is get out of your own way.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_01: Do it anyway.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_01: Find a I don't want to go to the gym when I wake up at 4 30 in the morning.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 36:27
  SPEAKER_01: I j there's so many things throughout my day that I don't want to do.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_01: Emotion does not drive my actions.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_01: Learn to feel your emotions and understand your emotions so you can push them aside to take action on what you need to do.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's the best tip right there.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, uh you don't say anything else.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_00: That's the best tip.
• 36:47
  SPEAKER_00: Well, the the reason I say that is look, emotion goes up and down.
• 36:50
  SPEAKER_00: Emotion goes up and down.
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, I'm having a great time.
• 36:53
  SPEAKER_00: Have you ever been driving down the road and you hear a great song and you're like, yeah, all right, and then you hear a sad song, and maybe you get a little sentimental.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_00: Emotion goes up and down, but it should not change your trajectory of where you're going.
• 37:05
  SPEAKER_00: So long after that initial excitement, enthusiasm about I want to try a new thing, dies off for whatever reason it died off with.
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because it's hard.
• 37:15
  SPEAKER_01: They don't realize it's frustrating.
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_01: You're a beginner, you don't realize that there is a giant learning curve to get to that next level that levels out a little bit.
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_01: And then you have another giant learning curve, which then people falter a bit.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_01: But that first giant learning curve, people are like, no.
• 37:30
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, yeah.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I totally agree.
• 37:32
  SPEAKER_00: So you you have to know why you're doing it.
• 37:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I would always suggest you try to find something you could be passionate about or you are passionate about because that's the thing that's gonna really push you through when you get that little bit of resistance if you plateau at all.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_01: And I will say it's normal to want to quit.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_01: Let's just let's just put that out there.
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes on an everyday basis, I'm just like, I don't know if I want to keep going with this, right?
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_01: Because it's just challenging right now for the nonprofit.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_01: We have to get ready for next year.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_01: In terms of, and what I mean next year, January, which is coming out and get funding.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, we're w well is dry in December.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_01: What are we gonna do?
• 38:08
  SPEAKER_01: And then I'm like, it's gonna have just you just I always say to myself, and this is well on my whiteboard, what is one thing that you could do today that's gonna move you forward tomorrow?
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_01: That's it.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, what is one thing, and so that's what I focus on, and then I know it'll come.
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_01: The donors will come, things will happen.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_01: But when you sometimes think about the how hard it's gonna be, how you're gonna get there, all that stuff, you overwhelm yourself and you're ready to quit.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_01: Just focus on one thing right now.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_00: Love it.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_00: Here's mine.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_00: I got one for you.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_00: And and anybody who's listening to the show, you might hear me say this before, but I I tell this especially to the younger people in the group um, you what you're doing today is your audition for tomorrow.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_00: So sometimes when you're not being your best self, you might actually be setting yourself up for failure tomorrow.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's okay to not be your best self every day, but my point is that if you could cognitively understand that on that day when you're about to meld in at work because you're having a horrible day, or you're about to meld in with your relationship, or you're about to meld it in with your kids or whomever it is, your friendship, that could be your audition for tomorrow, whatever you're doing.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so be your best self.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_00: Let me ask you one last thing.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_00: We start off talking about leaving a legacy, okay?
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, if somebody's out there and we've heard you loud and clear today, tell me what you would say to them about leaving their legacy.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_00: What should they be doing?
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_01: Well, what's the impact that they want to make on the world?
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta go internal, ask yourself some questions on what do you want the next generation to what do you want to leave the next generation with, right?
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_01: And it could just be your story.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_01: And you could just write that story and someone could find it, or whether it's uh a family member or a friend or whatever, and that story can inspire somebody, right?
• 39:48
  SPEAKER_01: Think about like Anne Frank, right?
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_01: And how that journal got left behind that legacy that she left, that was not the intention, right?
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_01: But her story mattered.
• 39:58
  SPEAKER_01: Her story made an impact, right?
• 40:00
  SPEAKER_01: And I share with the kids every single time I finish a presentation, I say, You just read my story.
• 40:07
  SPEAKER_01: I felt like the alien that didn't belong.
• 40:09
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe characters and alien.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_01: And then each one of you guys has a story, and that story is meant to be told.
• 40:15
  SPEAKER_01: And I hope one day I get to read your story just like you guys read mine.
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_01: Oh.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_01: And right there, it's like your story can be the legacy because, as you said earlier in the show, we feel in the teen world that nobody understands, that nobody's been through it before.
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_01: And then as you get older, you get wiser and realize this is normal, right?
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_01: So if a teenager or someone can hear your story and hear you went through struggles too, they don't feel so alone.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_01: So sharing a story is a part of a legacy, and obviously literacy is very important to me because I have a non-profit about it, right?
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm an author.
• 40:53
  SPEAKER_01: But through stories, you can not only leave a legacy, but you can also help others not feel like they're alone.
• 41:03
  SPEAKER_00: You know, that's that's awesome.
• 41:04
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's a good place for us to kind of wrap for today because honestly, if you're thinking about your legacy, what your legacy is gonna be, and and I actually had this conversation with an employee the other day.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_00: They're going through something in their personal life that was very challenging.
• 41:18
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, I think you're gonna triumph through this, and I think when you triumph, I think you're gonna be able to tell a story about it.
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_00: And when you tell that story, that can inspire somebody who's going through that exact same thing.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_00: So don't give up.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, just think what you can do for others through that.
• 41:31
  SPEAKER_00: So, well done, Gina.
• 41:32
  SPEAKER_00: You have uh been a great guest today.
• 41:35
  SPEAKER_00: I appreciate everything you had to say.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_00: How can people find out more about you?
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_01: So you can find out more about me at ginacazazza.com.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_01: That's g-in-a-c-a-s-a-z-z-a.com.
• 41:45
  SPEAKER_01: Or to learn more about the nonprofit, you go to empower lit.
• 41:49
  SPEAKER_01: That's empower l-i-t, nonprofit.org.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_00: All right, very good.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks for being on the show.
• 41:55
  SPEAKER_00: We'll see you next time.
• 41:56
  SPEAKER_00: And to all of you listening, thank you for your attention.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_00: We hope you got something great out today.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks to our sponsors, Carolina Bays Holmes.
• 42:03
  SPEAKER_00: And uh, if you like the show, make sure to like and share us on the social media your preference.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_00: And we'll see you next time on the Leader Mentality Show or Rob Clemens.