Latest / What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie? / #150: Doom Asylum (1987) - Tubi or Not to Be

Transcript

#150: Doom Asylum (1987) - Tubi or Not to Be · What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie?

0:06
What's your least favorite scary movie?
0:10
Oh God, Welcome to watch your least favorite Scary Movie, the
0:14
podcast where we talk about the good, the bad, the ugly, and the
0:17
absurd, and all of our favorite and least favorite.
0:19
Scary movies because we believe every horror movie rightfully
0:22
has its fan base. Even if we don't always get it.
0:25
My name is Travis. My name is Jessie and no, go
0:28
ahead. I was gonna say, and we're back
0:30
for another live, unedited and mostly undrawn installment OF2V
0:35
or not to V Yeah, all right. And it was my pick this week,
0:40
guys. And boy did I pick one.
0:45
It was a movie I. Certainly could say that you
0:47
did, in fact, pick a movie. Oh God, I don't know how we're
0:52
gonna talk about this one at all.
0:54
I I have a page and like half of a back of a page of notes and
0:59
all. I wanna know what's fucked up.
1:01
I took more notes for this than I did for high tension.
1:04
I almost did a full piece of paper back and like front and
1:09
back. I don't know how I did it.
1:11
There were times where I'm like this should be important and it
1:14
just isn't so. I don't really.
1:17
I don't know. This is gonna be weird.
1:18
This is probably gonna be one of the more weird episodes that
1:21
we've done cuz I don't know how to talk about this fucking
1:24
movie, but just you guys already know what it is.
1:26
This fucking doom asylum. Yeah, you saw the title when you
1:29
clicked on it. So as you guys probably already
1:32
know, if you've been listening to the show for a while, which
1:34
if you haven't, welcome, we're glad you're here.
1:36
Hi. This part of our theme for the
1:42
month of June is Pride Month, where we've been picking movies
1:45
that either have characters, cast members, crew members, or
1:49
themes pertaining to. LGBT concerns, representation.
2:01
I don't know. It kind of changes between
2:02
movies, like exactly what the connection is.
2:06
And for the month of June, what we are doing is we are taking
2:11
all of our Patreon proceeds. We are going to match those with
2:13
our own funds and we're going to donate those to the Trevor
2:15
Project. Friend of the Pod author Robert
2:18
Pia Tone has offered that if anybody would like to make any
2:22
individual. Donations to The Trevor Project
2:25
send us or him proof of the donation and he will send a
2:29
signed copy of every single one of his books to the person with
2:32
the highest donation at the end of the month.
2:34
Which is really great because The Trevor Project is super,
2:37
super important, especially even in 2023.
2:40
Unfortunately, you know, people are still, I think the climate
2:46
right now is a little bit more tense than it has been in the
2:48
past, so I think it's more important.
2:51
Once again, or tense in a different way, I It's fucking
2:54
depressing is what it is. It's it's hard to speak on my
2:57
end because you know, but yeah, I I get the impression that it's
3:02
still, it's still a good cause. It's a very valuable
3:06
organization and unfortunately a very necessary one.
3:11
That being said, I don't have any.
3:16
Information about this movie or any statistics.
3:20
We truthfully didn't even know what connection would be made
3:24
with this movie to the theme because it's too be or not to be
3:27
movie. And you know what?
3:27
This is a weird fucking movie. Anyway, it's a short movie.
3:31
We're just going to roll with it this episode, but we did want to
3:33
go ahead and plug what our intention is for the month.
3:36
Yeah, we'll just get it out there.
3:39
OK, so let's go ahead and start talking about this fucking
3:43
movie. So.
3:45
Let's, let's, let's try to talk about this movie, OK?
3:48
Let me go through my whole process of why I chose this.
3:51
OK, so doom asylum. Because you're secretly a Sex
3:54
and the City fan? Well.
3:56
We never talked about it before. I'm a fan of her.
3:58
I liked her character in Seinfeld and I liked her in this
4:02
movie. Yeah.
4:05
OK, so Doom Asylum is. It's, it's a nice name.
4:08
I like that name. It.
4:09
It grabs my attention. I mean, I chose Blood Junkie
4:12
last time. So you know what grabs me.
4:15
Yeah, with the title. This is also a movie that had a
4:20
release from Arrow, So I was and that's the version that we
4:24
watched. We watched it on to be and I've
4:28
also just heard good things in general about it.
4:31
Our one of like our friends and listeners, Chad has messaged us
4:35
like asking if we have seen this before.
4:38
I think he really. That's why I recognized the
4:40
name. Yeah, he So it's been
4:42
recommended to us. And this on paper is definitely
4:47
a Jesse and Travis movie, but yeah, so that's why I went with
4:52
it. So Doom Asylum premiered October
4:57
28th, 1987. OK.
5:00
It had its at wide release March 10th, 1988.
5:06
I don't know the festival that it premiered at.
5:08
It's just MIFEDI don't know what that stands for, but it was in
5:13
Italy. So it's, you know, maybe
5:15
something that they do over there.
5:17
Obviously we watched this on Tubi because this is Tubi or not
5:20
to be. Yes, it's what we do here.
5:22
OK, so story was written by Richard Friedman and Stephen G
5:28
Minkin, screenplay by Rick Marks, directed by Richard
5:32
Friedman, music by Dave Erlanger and Jonathan Stewart.
5:37
And for the special effects makeup, we have Rs Cole, who did
5:41
the monster design. And for just the general special
5:44
effects artist, it was Vincent J Gustini.
5:47
OK, the cast we have Patty Mullen, who plays Judy and Kiki,
5:54
Kristin Davis, who plays Jane. That's the girl from Sex and the
5:58
City. Y'all.
5:58
Yes, Ruth Collins plays Tina, William.
6:02
Hey, is Mike or Mom, depending on who you want to, how you want
6:07
to refer to them. So it there's like a graph of
6:11
like, how tense the movie is and how likely we are to refer to
6:14
Mike as Mom I'm Yeah, it drops off at a like part way through
6:19
the point where he's hanging off the building.
6:22
Interestingly enough, not when he first starts to hang off the
6:24
building. No, it's all chill.
6:26
Then it's all cool. Yeah, all gravy, baby.
6:29
Harrison White plays Darnell, Kenny L Price plays Dennis, Don
6:34
Alvin plays Godiva Fair and plays Rapunzel, and Michael
6:38
Rogan plays Mitch. You know, we never learn which
6:41
of the tots is Godiva and which one is Rapunzel.
6:45
Dude, I was watching this movie. I didn't even bother to write
6:47
their names. That's just like end tots.
6:49
We don't learn their names until they're both dead.
6:52
Yeah. She's just, I think they may
6:54
have been mentioned, but I don't.
6:56
I mean, we don't really know. Like it's not written in a way
6:58
that makes it obvious that that's their names.
7:00
And their pictures aren't on IMDb.
7:02
No, I never. I don't even know which one's
7:04
which. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
7:06
We never learn like you would think.
7:07
Rapunzel would be the one with the long hair.
7:09
Both have long hair. Yeah.
7:11
I don't know what Gadhava is a reference to, so I'd you know.
7:14
Also lost there, so all right. I feel like there's some sort
7:18
of. I don't know.
7:20
Are you looking it up right now? Yeah cuz I am curious.
7:22
I thought I knew, but now I don't want to say it out loud
7:24
since we don't edit these. Yeah, I guess that's a good
7:26
call. Yeah.
7:28
I also didn't expect to have this big of a cast to write
7:31
down. But you know, I mean that is
7:33
everybody in this movie pretty much, except for some characters
7:37
that are only there for like 2 seconds.
7:39
Literally all that's coming up is Godiva chocolate, OK?
7:42
I feel like there's like, I wanna say like she's a goddess
7:46
or a queen. It sounds like a name like that.
7:50
You know? I'll take your word for it.
7:51
We don't have to know. It's OK.
7:53
I don't even think that they knew when they were writing this
7:55
movie. OK, hold on now, you found it.
7:57
Yes, according to Wikipedia, Godiva or Lady Godiva was an
8:01
Anglo-Saxon noble woman who according to legend.
8:04
Rode naked through the streets of Coventry in England in order
8:06
to gain a remission of the oppressive taxation imposed by
8:09
her husband on his tenants. Nice.
8:12
OK, good to know. OK, Jesse.
8:16
Budget or Bug Ted? Well, clearly this is
8:19
multimillions. Yeah, I mean, obviously they got
8:21
some big financial backings for this venture here.
8:26
Yeah, the budget on this is $90,000.
8:30
Honestly. Good for them.
8:32
Yeah, cuz this is more than I was expecting you to say out
8:34
loud. Yeah, I mean it looks super low
8:37
budget. I don't have an opening box
8:40
office and I don't have a worldwide gross because just no
8:43
information of that. But the IMDb score is 4.6.
8:48
Which I'm honestly, I'm kind of impressed with that too.
8:51
Seriously. In a good or bad way.
8:55
Like, in a good way. OK, Like, good for them for
8:58
getting that. For getting score.
8:59
Yeah. OK, cool.
9:00
All right, so I've got 3 movies here that came out in 1987.
9:05
I don't necessarily have a theme, OK?
9:08
They were all just kind of gut feelings.
9:10
They all just exist. Yeah, they do.
9:12
Much like this movie. So the first one, I chose it
9:16
because I remember seeing the cover in my movie rental store
9:21
all the time and it always creeped me out as a kid.
9:23
And it's American Gothic, OK? And you know, it's the cover
9:27
with the people, like the old too old couple with the
9:30
pitchfork. Yeah, I mean the painting.
9:32
Notoriously titled American Gothic.
9:34
Well, I didn't know that that was the name I was like whenever
9:36
I saw that I was like, I actually Google searched old
9:40
painting old people pitchfork and then it was like American
9:43
Gothic. I'm like, OK, thanks for making
9:44
me feel stupid. Goo did not realize it was the
9:48
same name that released May 13th, 1987 and that actually
9:54
premiered at the Cain Film Festival.
9:56
Oh wow. Yeah, I've never seen it, but
9:59
maybe we can watch it someday. I don't have a budget for it.
10:03
I don't have a gross for it, but it has a 5.8 on IMDb.
10:06
All right, Next up Creepshow 2. OK.
10:11
That's also a movie that came out in 1987 that I was like,
10:14
sure. So that came out March 1st,
10:17
1987. Budget of $3.5 million worldwide
10:21
gross of $14 million with a six out of 10 on IMDb.
10:26
So never seen it. I don't even think I've seen a
10:30
full Creep show movie at all, honestly.
10:33
Wow. Yeah, I don't know.
10:35
And I know that Shutter has a show and I have just something
10:38
about it. It's just never really grabbed
10:40
me. Maybe one day we'll watch that
10:41
one too. OK, third movie.
10:46
This one I kind of feel matches my feelings towards this movie
10:50
as a movie that I really thought that I was going to enjoy but
10:53
ended up not really being big on Slaughterhouse.
10:58
OK. Yeah, that was one that.
10:59
You were so disappointed when we finished watching that one by
11:03
Slaughterhouse. Yeah, that was the last Drivein
11:05
movie from last season. On paper, perfect Travis movie
11:09
even. Kind of seems like a Texas
11:11
Chainsaw Massacre type movie, but I just, I don't know, just
11:15
something bad. It didn't really do it for me.
11:18
That came out August 28th 1987 with a budget of $110,000.
11:22
No gross, but a 5.3 on IMDb. Okay got 2 tag lines.
11:28
Okay. First one is slashing with a
11:32
snicker slaughter with a smirk. I mean, I guess one could argue
11:38
any. Tagline could exist for this
11:40
movie, so yeah, sure. Yeah, I guess that's true.
11:44
Second one is it'll send shivers up your funny bone.
11:47
See, they're really trying to drive in that this is a comedy
11:50
and I get it. I get the impression now after
11:53
watching it that this is first and foremost a comedy.
11:57
MM HM. Which okay?
11:59
Sure. Okay okay.
12:01
I believe you. All right, so this is to be or
12:07
not to be So we don't do fun facts, so let's just go ahead
12:10
and talk about our feelings about this one.
12:12
So, Jesse, what did you think of this one?
12:17
What's your good? What's your good?
12:18
No, no. We gotta go look good first.
12:20
Okay, I will say a lot of the humor landed with me.
12:25
I did, yeah. Yeah.
12:29
Yeah, I'll like stand upon that further.
12:31
But yeah, sat here. Really.
12:33
Good. The humor landed well with me.
12:35
OK for me, I've got the kills were creative in this.
12:41
So with it being like it is still a horror movie and they do
12:45
a good job and the effects are actually pretty good too, for
12:49
the budget, for everything, you know.
12:52
I thought that I enjoyed watching that much at least.
12:55
What about the bad? I strongly feel like this would
13:01
work 100 times better as a short.
13:06
If this was like 30 minutes long, it would be perfect.
13:09
You wanna know what's crazy? This movie is only an hour and
13:12
17 minutes. It's such a short movie.
13:15
But yeah, it felt like it was a long movie.
13:18
Like The thing is that it? It is.
13:22
You can feel them killing their own pace.
13:28
By like having to drag out scenes in a way that doesn't
13:31
make sense, we get shots repeated multiple times like
13:35
Darnell and one of the tots running to each other that I
13:39
know that that was supposed to be super funny or something, but
13:42
like for me, I was like this is just this is taking too long.
13:46
Like you're you're spending way too much time on this right
13:48
here. Yeah, or like.
13:50
Tina walking down the same hallway, looking for the killer
13:53
again and again. And again, dude, I saw that and
13:56
like, I thought like, am I like Kevin Deja vu?
13:58
Yeah, I thought we were having a glitch in the screen.
14:00
Yeah, I was freaking. I was like, wait, I could've
14:02
sworn this already happened. And then?
14:05
And then plugging in the older movie shots of it was in the
14:09
movie. I think if we take all of that
14:12
out where they're not trying to bring it up to like a feature
14:15
length runtime. I think this would land so much
14:20
better because the pacing of the jokes would make a lot more
14:23
sense. The story wouldn't be at, the
14:25
story would be just as convoluted.
14:27
But you kind of get the tone of it from the jump.
14:30
I think trying to turn it feature length is what killed
14:33
it. I think so too, honestly, that
14:35
all that stuff really did just Take Me Out of it.
14:37
Every time we cut back to the movie, like the like movie
14:41
within the movie, it's just like him.
14:43
Like he goes out, he kills somebody and then it goes back
14:45
to him going back to his couch watching a movie.
14:47
And you're not getting like just like a second or two of the
14:50
movie, like you're getting like full on scenes of the movie.
14:52
And it's like, we get it. We understand the parallels
14:54
between this movie and then the movie we're watching.
14:58
Like it just takes you out of Yeah and it kills me too much
15:01
filler in this it's just it's wait yeah this seems to be like
15:06
a 40 minute movie. Maybe 30 minute I.
15:08
Don't know? 30-40 minutes and it's
15:10
excellent. Yeah, sure.
15:13
My so I agree with you that one of my other bats is I can't
15:17
stand Tina and the tots acting Tina's laugh drives me.
15:22
It's so fucking annoying. It's so fucking bad.
15:27
I normally I love bad acting, but holy shit, that stuff right
15:31
there. Just.
15:32
I think the problem is she's got no peaks and valleys, yeah, it's
15:36
just everything is delivered with the same intensity, same
15:40
tone. Like you have to have a little
15:42
bit of give and take when it comes to humor and whatnot, and
15:46
it just, she's foot on the pedal at all times.
15:50
Yeah, it's just too much for me. I'm sorry, OK?
15:54
Ugly. Okay.
15:57
Well, since we are in our prior month theme, I'm going to say
16:02
the way they refer to Tina, that I'm not gonna repeat out loud
16:08
because in the context, it feels derogatory.
16:12
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think you're right.
16:13
Yeah. Foo boy.
16:17
I don't know. Like, this dude's pretty fucking
16:20
ugly. He is his makeup.
16:23
It's so weird. You know what?
16:26
This is also just gonna be my I'm kind of absurd with this,
16:29
but, you know, this will be, I guess, part of it.
16:31
He How does he look like that after a car wreck?
16:34
Because they had started the autopsy and they'd started
16:36
peeling back his face. Ohh.
16:37
Is that what happened? Yeah.
16:39
Ohh OK Cuz like I was like, OK, I saw the wreck.
16:41
He was perfectly fine. Yeah.
16:43
And then, like, we're there and he's on the table and all of a
16:46
sudden half of his face is missing.
16:49
OK, Yeah. OK.
16:51
Sure. OK.
16:52
All right. Absurd.
16:55
OK, so at one point Jane is referring to these murders that
17:00
multiple people have said has happened.
17:02
She refers to it as a mass delusion.
17:05
And at that point in my notes, I just wrote this entire movie is
17:08
a mass delusion. Oh my God, it is.
17:10
And that's it. The whole the whole movie.
17:12
I cannot pick a single moment of it.
17:15
I forced myself to write notes so that way I would have
17:19
something to talk about today, but there I don't.
17:24
I truly don't know how we're gonna talk about this for more
17:27
than 15 minutes. You know how a lot of times when
17:30
we watch a movie, we say the whole movie is absurd?
17:34
No, this one for real though. Actually, this one, it's just
17:38
all absurd. Okay my mom.
17:40
And in a way that I would actually, like I said I think I
17:43
would love this movie if it was 30 minutes.
17:46
If it was a 30 minute short, I would.
17:48
Love it. Yeah.
17:50
Yeah. You need to cut the filler.
17:52
I think I could have enjoyed this one a little bit more.
17:56
Well, OK. I don't know.
17:57
For me, the humor doesn't really land.
17:59
I guess some like the jokes, like his one letters whenever he
18:02
kills people. Like, I just.
18:04
I don't know. I'm not.
18:05
I'm not laughing at it. I didn't.
18:07
I laughed. Maybe one or two times.
18:09
You know what I think happened? What?
18:10
This is my personal theory for you, OK?
18:13
Because you were really excited for the Twisted Metal teaser.
18:18
And then we watched it and you're like, oh, so I guess
18:21
they're going humorous with sweet tooth.
18:23
And I think that soured you to everything else for the rest of
18:27
the night. I was thinking about that again
18:29
today, and I thought about it even harder.
18:33
I was like, no, that dialogue. That was just really cringy
18:36
dialogue. Like, how the fuck does like,
18:39
does Sweet Tooth go? Oh word.
18:41
Are you fucking kidding me? Well, they hired Will Arnett.
18:44
Yeah. Why?
18:44
You can do serious. He's done serious.
18:48
Don't, don't, don't my. I think that's what happened to
18:54
you. I think maybe if you were in a
18:56
different headspace when we watched this, it might have
18:59
landed differently. I 100% accept that.
19:02
Maybe if I sit down and give this movie another shot, like a
19:06
second try, I might end up having a completely different
19:09
feeling about it. OK, my absurd though is the
19:13
opening where they wrecked the car and how long it takes for
19:17
them to wreck the car. I guess like kind of think of
19:21
like the Zamboni kill and what is it?
19:25
Awesome powers, Awesome powers. Yeah it's like no, but then like
19:29
in this way here they're like Oh my God, we're wrecking and then
19:31
they're just like steering the car and it's like 5 seconds
19:35
later. Like they could have reasonably
19:37
just, you know, drove off the road and then voided the crash.
19:41
But they do that, and she. Or he could have just not been
19:46
making out with her and drinking directly from a bottle of
19:49
champagne while he was driving. No, that's OK After celebrating
19:53
winning a lawsuit, yeah. Like he's a lawyer, I'm sure
19:57
he's argued plenty of cases. For the US.
20:01
Wrongful death. You know, whatnot.
20:04
Yeah. Yep.
20:05
OK, whatever. OK, let's do this.
20:07
OK, So what are you? What are you writing this?
20:09
Or what are you rating this? I'm gonna give it A5 right now.
20:13
You gonna do it OK5? Because like I said, there is
20:17
good bones. Good bones.
20:19
This movie is my fixer upper. Like, I've never before wanted
20:23
to take a movie and edit it my way, but I want to do that with
20:26
this movie because I want to have a neat little 30 minute
20:29
package that we enjoy watching. Yeah, you know, like, I think if
20:32
you did tighten it up, do some, like, reedits for those, you
20:35
could definitely make a pretty nice little movie.
20:37
Here it feels like. You know, in school those
20:40
teachers that had like a word count for papers for seemingly
20:44
no reason and you're just going. So in conclusion, as a summary
20:50
of all of the points mentioned above, I would like to reiterate
20:54
that. As a general feeling of the, you
20:59
know what I mean? Like it just feels like they are
21:00
stalling. You know time like how most
21:03
papers like that have like a 2003 thousand word limit.
21:06
This tells me that Hollywood features have to have at least
21:09
117 minutes mm HM exactly. If you don't have that, you
21:13
don't have a movie. An hour and 17 minutes you just.
21:17
Did your 100. You said 117 minutes.
21:20
Did it Really. Yeah.
21:21
Oh shit. If this movie was 117 minutes.
21:24
This is world. Every hour is 100 minutes.
21:27
How many hours is 100? That's almost two hours.
21:29
So a fog. No, I don't think I could do
21:31
almost two hours of this movie. I don't think they could do it.
21:35
I don't. I think if you took all of the
21:36
raw footage as it was, it wouldn't reach too much, no?
21:40
You know what would happen? Like we would watch.
21:43
It would be shorter. No.
21:44
We would watch what they had for this right here.
21:46
And then we would also watch the entirety of the movie that he's
21:49
watching in this. That's how they would do it.
21:53
I'm gonna give this like 3 1/2 okay.
21:58
Like I said, I recognize that maybe another day, another time
22:04
I might have, I might walk away with a different experience.
22:06
But just watching it last night, I was just like, damn, this is
22:10
just not really hitting it for me.
22:12
This is like, I was really excited.
22:14
It seemed pretty good and it kind of let me down all.
22:17
Right. We have a starting average of
22:19
4.25. So I think this is one of the
22:21
few times that we're actually lower than the IMDb.
22:24
I actually yeah, that is crazy, right?
22:28
OK, so you ready to give this a shot?
22:31
All right. Let's time it.
22:33
All right. No, don't bother saying that
22:37
time out loud. So we're starting here at 222.
22:38
That won't mean anything to the people listening once we OK,
22:42
sure. Yeah.
22:42
OK, OK. So we start off with and Judy
22:47
and Judy, they're driving down the road.
22:50
They are partying, celebrating because he's a lawyer.
22:53
He just won a big case and. They're celebrating.
22:57
Cuz he's a lawyer. Yeah, we're lawyers.
23:02
Yeah. I mean that's a good reason to
23:04
celebrate. Sure.
23:06
Okay. So yeah, they're driving down
23:07
the road drinking. He just.
23:08
Won a $5,000,000 case. Which did they say what it was?
23:16
Did she? Is it her money?
23:18
I feel like it has to be her money because otherwise why is
23:20
he excited about somebody else? In fact, like, yeah, as a lawyer
23:24
he gets a portion of that, but he's not getting to see 5
23:27
million. I think she is because the
23:29
newspaper clipping he holds of later says coal miner's daughter
23:32
wins millions. Oh, I didn't.
23:34
So we have also here a very clear ethics boundary where he's
23:39
like seeing his client, yeah. Absolutely.
23:43
And she is like, now I'm never gonna have to paint another nail
23:46
in my life as she holds up a very well manicured hand of her.
23:49
And I kind of was like, I like that nail Polish.
23:51
I wonder what shade it is. And she's So if we can send that
23:56
brat kid of mine to boarding school, OK, cool.
24:00
Way to just be immediately unlikable.
24:03
Yeah, they really are trying to make her seem like a piece of
24:06
shit. Him too.
24:06
I mean, they're not making these people.
24:08
Yeah, Redeemable at all. So yeah, they're like, OK, yeah,
24:12
yeah, sure. We'll go run off and do our
24:14
thing and we'll have a I love you.
24:16
You know I want to be with you. We'll definitely be together
24:19
forever, yeah. There's a happy sub bit of my
24:21
wife and all of a sudden while they're doing all that, there's
24:25
a van driving on the you know. Just appropriately, yeah.
24:28
Just within the legal limits, other direction.
24:31
So they're about to cross paths, but he's all over the road cuz
24:34
he's drunk and. Not looking at the road, yeah,
24:38
and not making it any attempt at correcting whenever he realizes
24:43
he's about to wreck. So he's just full on wrecks
24:46
right into him. They are off on the side of the
24:49
road outside of the car. She lost her hand.
24:54
Well, it makes sense. If they're outside of the car,
24:55
they were in a convertible. Truthfully, this wreck could
24:58
have been even worse than what it was.
25:00
That's true. So yeah, he's freaking out.
25:06
He tries to grab her hand, but it's like.
25:08
I mean, he does grab her hand. Yeah.
25:10
I mean, but like, he's trying. To attach to her anymore.
25:12
He's trying to hold her hand to comfort her as she's dying and
25:17
yeah, so well she. Seemed comforted.
25:19
She said that they can reattach it at the hospital.
25:22
Is that what she said? Yeah.
25:23
OK. She's she's done with Hope.
25:25
Yeah. Good.
25:26
OK. And then he passes out.
25:28
OK, Boom. We cut to the autopsy.
25:31
Room Speaking of people really bad at their jobs, this.
25:36
This autopsist. I don't know a medical examiner.
25:39
That's probably the right word. Autopsist.
25:41
I like it. Yeah, I'm.
25:43
Sticking He's got an intern who has picked the wrong career,
25:49
judging off of how squeamish he is already.
25:52
I hate how weirdly stained their coats are.
25:56
You know, like it doesn't even look against actual blood.
25:58
They've had a long day if P Linder misses off of.
26:03
Folks, without checking for a heartbeat first, I How does this
26:07
even happen? I don't know how it just it
26:10
doesn't this doesn't happen. But yeah, to Mitch it is
26:16
happening. So they're starting to, just
26:19
like you said earlier, peel off his skin and cutting him open,
26:24
trying to what determine the cause of death, and then he
26:28
starts twitching and guys like, no, it's OK, they do that.
26:32
Which is that is the thing that is real.
26:34
It's like rigor mortis, whatever, you know, Boom.
26:37
Rigor Morris girl. Dead, dead people.
26:39
Shit. And the guy's like, no, this
26:42
isn't dead people shit. This is like he's he's looking
26:44
at me right now. He's up.
26:45
He's. Like how I imagine you see me
26:49
when I allegedly sit up in the middle of the night because I'm
26:53
freaked out about something and I don't remember it the next
26:55
day. Yeah, it's kind of like, you
26:58
know, you are kind of very Mitch like with that you're cool.
27:01
What's going on? Where's Judy?
27:02
Where's Judy? Who do you say that?
27:04
Why? Actually, where's Judy?
27:06
Thankfully, you don't do it. He does it.
27:08
Then he just, like, kills him. Like he doesn't wait for the
27:13
answer. He's just like, where's Judy?
27:14
Ah, he's like, no, that didn't give me a chance to answer.
27:17
Well, they said Judy is dead. Yeah, dude, that would be
27:36
shitty. Oh, did they?
27:19
Yeah. And instead of remembering that
27:21
he's responsible for that, he assumes they are.
27:23
Yeah. You just fucking killed them.
27:25
Yeah, well, maybe she was alive, and then they finished her
27:28
autopsy and she wasn't anymore. By the end of it, Yeah.
27:31
Do you imagine writing Cause of death?
27:33
Autopsy. OK, so it's ten years later and
27:43
it's just the same Rd. that they're driving down.
27:45
It's the. Same car.
27:47
It's the same car. It's the same car.
27:49
It's like, this is how they these people probably wrote a
27:54
book on how to do a budget movie, Like same show as same
27:57
car, same actor. But this time there's more
28:00
people in there. Yeah, and they're all driving
28:02
down the road just discussing the legend of Mitch.
28:07
It was 10 years later. Yeah, we get a full, not quite,
28:11
exposition because we see this, the background of what made
28:14
Mitch the way he is. But we learned what's happened
28:16
in the previous ten years, which is that people tend to die at
28:19
this abandoned hospital. Yeah, they're going to an
28:22
abandoned hospital for not any reason given.
28:27
They're gonna picnic outside of it.
28:30
I don't know. I don't know.
28:32
I don't understand. So they're driving down there
28:35
and they're having a good time. And then Kiki's like, yeah, this
28:38
is the road my mom died on. And then they stop and there's
28:41
like a memorial, yeah, set up for her.
28:44
Still 10 years later. Yeah.
28:45
Her boyfriend Mike, he gives me like Ricky and Angela's mom.
28:52
And was it? And Martha?
28:54
Yeah, like, because he's always second guessing everything he
28:57
says. He says to her.
29:03
I understand that you lost a mother, and you will.
29:07
I'm not your mother, but I could be your mother if you want me to
29:11
be. And she says, can I call you
29:16
mom? And he says, of course yes.
29:22
And they take it to heart. Yeah, I thought that this was
29:27
just playful joking, but she's just like she has a new mom now.
29:33
Yeah, he he likes straight up. This is like straight up and
29:35
adoption happening right here. Yeah, he didn't realize that he
29:38
was assigning adoption papers, but this is, you know, He thinks
29:42
it's playful because he's still wanting to, like, have sex
29:44
later. Yeah, but then she says mom,
29:46
that's incest and he realizes that he he went the wrong
29:50
direction and trying to comfort her.
29:52
I'm actually a mother now. Look, I'm too young.
29:56
God damn it. So they show up at the the
30:00
asylum and they hear some of the worst fucking music.
30:05
Is it? Is it heard in my life?
30:07
I don't know. Here's the thing, and I don't
30:09
mean that in a like it was superior taste of music.
30:13
I mean in that it sounds like they put all of the work into
30:17
finding public domain movie to show throughout this movie and
30:23
they had no time, energy or budget left to find public
30:27
domain. Music.
30:28
So instead they put in various like speaker feedback and
30:34
somebody like saying words in the background that in and none
30:38
of this matches up to what we see Tina and the Tots doing
30:41
inside. Yeah, because they play in
30:43
actual instruments. Yeah, they're playing actual
30:44
instruments. They're doing things.
30:46
Tina is actually like mouthing words to a song.
30:49
None of it matches up to what we are hearing.
30:51
And this is where I first went is this.
30:55
Real. Yeah.
30:56
Is this a real movie? Is it really?
30:58
Actually, this is where the delusion begins.
31:00
It feels like in, you know how sometimes, like sometimes it'll
31:05
happen in reality TV shows or even like a sitcom where it hits
31:09
syndication and they've lost the rights to like, music or
31:13
something that's put in there, so it gets replaced with
31:15
something super generic? And you're like, this feels
31:17
weird. What if that happened here?
31:19
I don't know. You know, I have no clue That
31:21
would explain it. But like just really, it's like
31:25
I this is like the least music music I've ever heard in my
31:30
life. Yeah.
31:30
It is just like feedback. Maybe they just like wire.
31:33
And I I swear, I swear you guys, this is not like get off my
31:38
lawn, old man. Kids these days don't know what
31:41
music sounds like. Yeah, it legitimately it is
31:43
just, hey, I listen, I listen to Beck, you know, I'm down with
31:49
the traditional instruments, but this is just not it.
31:55
So don't know. We've bopped to my pal Foot,
31:57
foot, Yeah, yeah, we have. You know like you know I never
32:03
thought we would make we would have the opportunity to make a
32:05
my pal foot foot I referenced I thought about it so proud of us
32:11
wait we truly hit end in miles to isn't that that's the band
32:14
that was like they were never allowed to listen to.
32:17
Yeah, the parents abused the hell out of them.
32:20
It's just a dad, I think. Yeah, the dad like forcing to
32:23
play music in the basement without ever hearing music, just
32:25
to like that's like an experiment which yeah, you know
32:27
what, actually interesting experiment, but like at the same
32:30
time very, very inhumane means of going about.
32:34
It it would never pass an ethics review board.
32:36
No, the IRB ain't ain't approving that shit.
32:41
But boy, it's interesting. So Darnell is kind of on the
32:46
same vibes as us with this right here.
32:48
And he's like, yeah, this isn't even music.
32:49
So I'm gonna go in there and unplug this shit.
32:52
They're playing inside the asylum, by the way.
32:55
So he goes in there and he unplugs.
32:57
All this stuff they don't have anymore.
32:59
Unplug instruments. So a lot of that immediately
33:01
upon hearing this Darnell's like.
33:04
That's Tina and the Tots. Yeah, like he is front row at
33:06
every single one of their shows, which is why I was surprised
33:09
when he goes in and he falls in love with one of the Tots
33:12
immediately. I'm like, have you never seen
33:13
her before? How do you know their music?
33:16
I'm thinking maybe it's like a Tina's the front person and she
33:19
has a revolving cast of people that play instruments around
33:23
her. Yeah, that do.
33:25
The band is always Tina and the Tots, as long as it's her with
33:28
two other people. Yeah, Tina and the Tots.
33:30
Kind of like Kitten. Yeah, sure.
33:33
Yeah. OK, what happened next?
33:38
What the fuck happened with this movie next?
33:40
OK, so this. Yeah, that's.
33:42
A good summary of the movie. Yeah, so he unplugs the
33:46
equipment and apparently they this is where they share their
33:49
like little fantasy moment. Like wife.
33:52
Like he makes eye contact with one of the tots and.
33:54
The drummer, yeah. And their whole thing is like,
33:57
it's a very unfocused shot. Of them running across the field
34:03
to each other in slow motion, Yeah.
34:05
And then whole cliche, after 2 minutes they finally embrace.
34:09
And then it's like okay, we are now in love.
34:13
While all of this is going on, the rest have set up camp
34:16
outside or picnic or whatever, and Tina and the Tots are
34:20
upstairs filling up condoms. Like water balloons, their band
34:23
practice was ruined because none of them knows how to plug their
34:27
instruments back in. All he did was flip a switch.
34:30
That's all he did. Flip the switch.
34:31
He just unplugged I cord. Yeah, Okay.
34:34
So yeah, it's boy, this movie. Okay.
34:38
So. So they go upstairs and they're
34:41
gonna make water balloons out of condoms.
34:43
Uh, huh. Yeah.
34:44
Which we all know from Jackass Forever does not work out the
34:48
way you think it will. Only Steve owes condoms.
34:51
Which is funny, because he was doing that as a way to promote
34:53
his condoms. It's like, yeah, bro, that's not
34:55
holding shit and nobody's gonna want your condoms anymore.
34:59
Which it worked out for him because they weren't popping.
35:03
No, they were. That's the thing.
35:05
Yeah, Okay. Never mind.
35:06
Some people, yeah, maybe they sold like hotcakes after that.
35:08
Like, damn, my shit's not gonna get through at all, Okay.
35:12
So this is where Mike realizes. Did all 30 years of you just say
35:21
now this shit's selling like hotcakes?
35:24
Is that like something new? Is something very old?
35:28
No, that's that's that's still gets used.
35:31
That's still out there. OK, this is where Mike, I think
35:35
realizes that Kiki's full on board with the mom thing because
35:40
she's continuing to call him mom Here he's he doesn't seem super
35:42
fazed yet. I think he may think it's an
35:44
actual joke still. Yeah, he realizes he cock walked
35:47
himself. But you know, he was just kind
35:51
of, well, OK, yeah. And also like 5 feet away, Mitch
35:56
is outside. So like, right there in
35:58
Plainview looking at the Yeah, news clipping.
36:00
Like, holy shit, that's that's kind of looking like Judy right
36:03
there. Yep.
36:04
Cuz it's like the news clip of Judy's death.
36:06
Yeah, yeah, Tina and the Todd start throwing the water
36:11
balloons. And Dennis, this guy, this
36:15
character drives me up the fucking wall, yeah?
36:18
Baseball cards go with Yeah, he's wearing a mats cat too.
36:21
So sorry Ohh men's fans, but fuck you.
36:26
And yeah, his baseball cards got wet, so he's freaking out.
36:29
And they're all freaking out, 'cause you know, they got water
36:32
balloon. You know what?
36:33
That's gonna be gross, though. Because if those are lubed
36:35
condoms, it's not just like water.
36:37
It's like oily too. Ohh.
36:39
Yeah, you're right. I didn't even think about that.
36:41
Yeah, yeah. Darnell was like, you know what,
36:43
guys? I got this.
36:45
I'm gonna share a quick little moment with them again.
36:48
Except this time they do that little fantasy thing.
36:50
But this time, I think this is Darnell.
36:52
Humping. Yeah, 'cause he's like straight
36:54
up thrusting her. I did chuckle with that.
36:55
I thought that that was kind of funny.
36:58
So he's like, you know what, I'll go take care of it.
36:59
And don't wait up for me 'cause I'm probably gonna have some
37:03
sex. So meanwhile, the French girl,
37:09
the French tat. Yeah, the French tat.
37:12
Le Petit tat. She says that she's gonna go
37:18
graffiti to protest. Yeah, an abandon asylum.
37:25
That has a lot of Metallica graffiti in it.
37:28
There's a lot of bands in. General.
37:31
Well, the only one I really saw was Metallica, cuz it was like
37:33
in four different places. Yeah, there's Led Zeppelin also.
37:36
Okay. And she's also like chanting
37:39
under her breath. To herself.
37:41
To the people, United will never be a part.
37:44
I can't. Why I don't.
37:49
I don't understand. It's just it's not even like
37:52
funny. It's not even good.
37:53
And her delivery? Agree.
37:55
Her delivery of this is so half hearted.
37:58
I think that's where it like it drains.
38:00
Me right. Here's what really gets me.
38:02
OK, so while she's doing this, Darnell gets killed.
38:05
He gets like little forceps to the hedge.
38:08
Pops him. Yeah.
38:10
Yeah. And so then she is going around
38:12
and she is spray painting as Mitch is washing his hands in
38:17
the bathroom, which seems like it would hurt since you know his
38:20
skin is peeling off. Yeah, like come on bro.
38:24
Like, did your hands like didn't none of this shit he'll like.
38:27
I know you might need like a skin graft or something like
38:29
your face, but like, did they get your hands at that?
38:31
Point you die of, like, shock or an infection.
38:36
Yeah, like, you know what I mean?
38:37
Yeah. And like, he's living in an
38:38
abandoned Cylon. That's not he's.
38:40
Gotta be a zombie, right? He's, he's gotta be something.
38:44
I don't know. Like, what's he eating as he's
38:47
surviving? That's a fucking abandoned song.
38:49
How does this place have power? Travis, you're asking all of the
38:54
questions that were completely ignored.
38:58
Yeah. The right thing.
38:59
Yeah. But anyway, he's got a sink full
39:01
of very, very hot water when she walks in.
39:03
And then she says, ah, I'm a Republican, as though that will
39:09
sit like, I don't She starts squirting Reagan.
39:12
Yeah, like she's like, I love ragonomics or something like
39:14
that. And said we get a Halloween too.
39:14
I don't know. And then, yeah, I thought right
39:16
here we were gonna get a Friday the 13th Jason X kill here where
39:21
he was gonna like, do that and then just like bash her face on
39:24
the counter. Yeah, we get a Halloween too.
39:27
And her hair changes completely. They didn't bother matching the
39:31
hair at all between the prop head and the actress because she
39:36
has like very PC crimped sections.
39:41
And this mannequin has half a head of curly yellow hair.
39:48
Yeah, it still looks pretty like decent.
39:51
Yeah, it's a pretty nice skill. I'm not mad about that, it's
39:54
just the hair thing like cuz you can immediately tell once it's
39:57
swapped cuz they didn't bother trying to match them.
40:00
Yeah, okay. So now yeah, we figure, did we
40:07
talk about the part where, like, the mic picks up the condom and
40:10
he like, hey, you wanna use one of these leashes?
40:13
Yeah, OK. Mom, that's insist.
40:16
Yeah. So Dennis is like laying out his
40:22
cards to dry. Kiki.
40:18
OK, yeah, that was way back there.
40:20
Wow. OK.
40:25
Yeah, that's right. Yeah.
40:26
And then Wade Boggs flies away. And it looks fully like somebody
40:31
tied a fishing line to it, like the old prank where you put a
40:34
fishing line on a dollar bill and I swear to God, I thought
40:36
that's what was happening here. Yeah, I mean, seriously, it's
40:39
gonna be like holding the card when yeah, that's what I thought
40:42
it was building up to. But no, Like, it's actually just
40:45
like it's because sentient. As observant as these kids are,
40:49
Mitch could have literally walked up.
40:51
Threaded the line through the card and walked away and
40:55
everybody would been like, was there somebody just here?
40:57
Yeah. No, no, shut up, mom.
41:01
And the way that Dennis goes about chasing it, he's just
41:04
quoting, He's like calling it a baseball game.
41:07
And yeah, it's so fucking over the top and weird.
41:11
I'm not a fan of this code. So he goes inside and he finds
41:16
the card, but then inside there he actually does find Mitch, who
41:19
is there waiting for him. With a drill, yeah.
41:22
And he drills straight into his forehead and he dies with a,
41:25
which I thought was a nice touch.
41:29
That was a nice touch. I'll give them credit for that.
41:32
Mitch has a Jason Voorhees Pamela shrine, except instead of
41:38
his mother's head it his his ex lover Slash.
41:42
Client's arm. Isn't it her hand?
41:45
Just her hand? Or is it her?
41:46
Whole. It's like, it's like part of her
41:49
hand and wrist. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
41:52
And he's watching TV too, cuz you know, he's like, there's a
41:55
lot of that in this movie. Yeah, so they can watch the
41:57
movie again. Like, he can still hold her hand
41:59
while they watch the movie. No, that's sweet.
42:01
Yeah, in a weird, weird way. So Mike goes to look for
42:05
Darnell, but he only finds Tina. And they start fighting while
42:12
the drummer goes downstairs to look for Darnell cuz she finally
42:15
learns his name. She goes is that the cute boy?
42:17
Mmhmm. And almost seen with the the
42:19
whole fighting in the background is so weird too.
42:22
Tina's a much better fighter than Mike.
42:24
She kicks his ass. And she's got him hanging off
42:26
the edge of the building. Ohh God, you do a good laugh.
42:30
Like that's exactly what it sounds like.
42:33
And. Jane and Kiki are down on the
42:36
ground and they look up at the top of this three story building
42:40
and Kiki goes, is that mom hanging off the building?
42:44
And Jane goes, yeah, but mom will be OK.
42:46
So Jane is, yeah, Jane is also been adopted.
42:49
I do like this too. This is kind of funny, I think.
42:51
I think it would be hilarious if the family kept growing
42:54
throughout, like like somebody else shows up like a Dennis or
42:58
darn, like, oh hey dad, what's up?
43:00
Or like Mitch, she was like. Mom, nice to meet you, ma'am.
43:07
Okay. So yeah, like Tina and Jane also
43:13
decided to head inside too. Kiki and Jane.
43:16
Kiki. Yeah, yeah.
43:18
And he hears Kiki's scream. Yeah, so he's like, I gotta go
43:25
help her. Meanwhile, the drummer is
43:27
looking for a journal and finds the French girl's head hanging
43:32
from the bathroom ceiling. Like, whenever he was hanging,
43:34
though, he hears that screen, he's like, OK, enough playing.
43:36
Like, he like, hops over. He's like, OK, I'm done with
43:38
this game, Tina. Like, this is fun.
43:40
Ha ha. Yeah, like, maybe they were
43:41
right. Like, he likes to hang off
43:43
building. Yeah, all the.
43:44
Time. Just this thing.
43:46
Yeah, maybe it was a OK. So yeah, she found the other
43:49
tot. And she ends up getting tripped
43:51
to death, yeah. So Jane says that she's gonna go
43:57
find Tina and ask where Dennis and Darnell are, and then Jane
44:05
and Kiki or no, Jane and Tina are just like insulting each
44:09
other back and forth. After Tina says that her
44:15
bandmates are missing, Jane like it was like, well, that's fake.
44:18
And she's like, it's not though, Yeah, they they think it's like
44:22
the mystery or like the legend that's been going on.
44:24
Yeah, I like how she finds Tina and then Shrimp tells him off.
44:27
And then just like fucks off and goes into the room, doesn't even
44:30
let her have a chance to say anything.
44:33
And then as soon as she goes in there she went into the room.
44:35
With where Mitch is with the saw and he just, like, cuts her face
44:39
in half. But before that, she's backing
44:42
away. She's like, OK, this is a messed
44:44
illusion. So what?
44:45
Would my parents see right now? Yeah, because her parents are
44:47
psychologists and and what's and more ridiculous is she's backing
44:52
away, but she backs into a chair and then just sits.
44:55
Down just sits down, just sits down and she's like, OK, I'm
44:57
waiting for it. That's a really good kill.
45:04
They did a good job making a fake head of her, that actor.
45:07
Yeah. Yeah, I was really impressed
45:09
with it. You see like the straight up,
45:11
you like all of the drilling through her head.
45:14
And Tina's just, like, standing there watching, and Mitch is
45:17
about to go for her. Except then Mike walks in.
45:19
So Mitch is like, ah, I gotta go.
45:21
Yeah. And he runs away.
45:23
And so Mike finds Tina behind chain and assumes that Tina is
45:29
the one that killed her, which is, I guess, reasonable enough.
45:32
Yeah, in all things considered. And she was about to kill him
45:36
for sure. Yeah, and Tina finds Darnell's
45:38
body at this moment and Mike hears her scream and he goes
45:43
running through the hall and it's like a very scooby-doo
45:45
esque shot cuz we just see him like running past like 10
45:48
different doorways going kick him coming.
45:51
I like how well he's doing that. This is another thing.
45:54
I got Chuck chuckle at me. He gets more and more panic.
45:56
It's like Kiki Kiki. Kiki Yeah.
45:59
Well, and then, OK, so. He's like, it's not Tina,
46:05
there's an actual psychopath on the loose and Kiki goes, what's
46:11
a psychopath? Yeah, and he's so confused like
46:13
okay. This is where I finally just
46:18
gave up and I wrote this movie as a mass delusion.
46:21
And Tina finds the bodies or pieces of bodies of Godiva, and
46:27
Rapunzel don't know which one's which.
46:32
Mike and Kiki find a Chapel and they decide that they're gonna
46:35
pray for their friends. It sounds simultaneously like
46:38
they're praying to find their friends, but also they're like
46:40
praying for their friends to go to heaven and find peace in
46:44
their afterlife. Like they're trying to hit a 1-2
46:46
punch with it, just like either or.
46:48
I like Kawa Kiki is like and God, I'll give you anything you
46:51
want. I'll give.
46:52
Money. Sex.
46:53
The Bloomies charge card. Just whatever, as long as we
46:57
make it out safely and mom say then, like flinching at this,
47:01
it's like, yeah, I'd fuck you too.
47:04
If that's what it takes, yeah. Mitch is like prepping A syringe
47:10
at this point. While they're all doing that,
47:11
he's watching them pray, Tina grabbed.
47:15
So I think. This is the moment that he
47:17
decided he actually wasn't gonna kill Mike because he was like,
47:20
he's going along with this bullshit.
47:22
He's he's gonna be a good motherinlaw.
47:24
Yeah. Like, maybe I will marry him.
47:25
And I'm gonna, like, autopsy him alive and get rid of some of his
47:28
skin. And we'll be me.
47:29
We'll be we'll be bubbies. Yeah.
47:31
Parents. Yeah.
47:34
Yeah. So Tina, like, grabs a pulled
47:37
arm herself. And then she.
47:40
Makes her way through this hallway for the tenth time this
47:42
may be. Yeah.
47:44
And then Mom and Kiki are going down the hallway and they hit a
47:49
fork in the path. And mom has this entire time
47:52
just been second guessing everything.
47:54
He's like, I don't really. I think we should maybe do this.
47:57
Or should we? I don't know.
47:58
And then here he's like okay. We can go where we have been
48:02
before and maybe he's there waiting for us.
48:03
Or we can go somewhere new and maybe he's waiting for us
48:07
somewhere there. So they choose new, and then as
48:09
soon as they start walking down that path, he jumps.
48:12
Out. Dirty syringe.
48:13
The neck. Yeah.
48:14
Not kills him. Yeah.
48:15
Syringes him. Yeah.
48:16
Which I think it's funny that immediately after he makes that
48:18
decision, he'd die, right? Gets attacked.
48:20
Yeah, so Kiki and Mom are both tied up and Mitch wakes mom up
48:27
and decides to start clipping toes off to the to the tune of
48:32
this little piggy, and only one of the toes spurs blood.
48:36
Just the middle one, that's all. That's where all of the tone
48:40
went to. So in case you guys are running
48:41
new, if anybody's got like a biology test coming up, yeah,
48:45
finals are done. Unless you're.
48:47
Doing so much class and this is where Tina comes in and she hits
48:55
Mitch with a pipe. And ties Kiki and then
48:58
immediately falls onto a conveyor belt that appears to be
49:02
a trash compactor. I don't know.
49:04
I got Child's Play 2 Vibes from this right here.
49:08
Yeah, I don't even know how it turned on.
49:10
Did he turn it on? I think.
49:11
I think she accidentally turned it on.
49:12
Right. Yeah, I don't know what
49:14
happened. She accidentally kills herself,
49:16
I think, But then he pops up after she's she like comes out
49:19
at the end. That's like a cube and like one
49:21
hand is like still intact or whatever.
49:24
I'm sure Mitch will keep that. Later, yeah, but yeah, Mitch
49:27
pops up and he makes like a one liner and he.
49:32
Yeah, that's something we haven't talked about, is the
49:35
fact that after every single kill, Mitch makes a one liner.
49:37
And I kind of love it. And I would love it in a very,
49:40
like, old school cartoon villain kind of way.
49:42
Yeah. They're just so bad though.
49:44
They're just so, so bad, OK? So this is where Kiki runs.
49:55
And Mitch is following and he keeps calling her Judy and she
49:58
keeps going no Kiki. And he's like, Judy, Kiki, Judy,
50:03
Kiki. And eventually she's like, yeah,
50:06
sure, I guess I'm Judy. And then she realizes who he is
50:10
and she's like, you guys are going to send me to all partings
50:13
go on. And so she needs him in the
50:14
groin, and he shows like the news clip of Judy to her, and
50:23
then she, like, stabs him in the face with this mirror that she's
50:26
been carrying the entire time. And then she just walks off down
50:30
the road. She makes her own one liner
50:31
after that. She's not even fazed by the fact
50:34
that she killed her mom's partner.
50:38
Slash killer slash lawyer Yeah. I don't really know.
50:41
I I don't know. Their relationships kind of
50:42
ambiguous, just stabs them, not even face just like, alright,
50:45
I'm gonna go walk down the road now.
50:46
I guess I'm done with my picnic and we get the credits.
50:50
Yep. And that's the end of the movie,
50:52
folks. So we did our best. 28 minutes.
50:55
We made it. Hey, that's not bad.
50:58
That movie could have been this one, too.
51:00
I think it would have been great if it was that long.
51:02
Yeah, it's I maintain. That it's not like a terrible
51:09
movie. They were just trying to make it
51:10
into something it wasn't. Yeah.
51:13
I don't know. Like, I really, really think it
51:17
bothered me to have like to be taken out of the movie so many
51:20
times by that movie within. The movie.
51:22
If it was part of, like, an anthology, I think we would love
51:26
it. Oh yeah, definitely.
51:27
Yeah, I think so. I just like, I wish it wasn't
51:30
like its own standalone thing because they didn't have quite
51:34
enough meat for the hoagie, you know?
51:36
Yeah. OK.
51:38
So that's what we would change to.
51:40
Change our rating. Yeah.
51:41
Are you changing your rating at all though?
51:44
I'll bump it up. I'll I'll bump mine up to like a
51:46
4.5. Yeah, I was gonna bump mine up
51:48
to a 5.5. Yeah.
51:49
And you're right there there's, it's there.
51:52
Like it? It can be a it has potential.
51:57
And yeah, I don't. I'm speechless.
52:02
So we we, our average went up from a 4.25 to 5.
52:06
OK, That's OK. We're back above.
52:08
Yeah, we did it. OK.
52:11
Travis, what was Scout's favorite part of the thing?
52:14
I think I know it. OK, I think it's whenever he had
52:17
the hot water and he put one of the tots head in there because
52:20
Scout likes water, especially hot water.
52:23
No, obviously. It's the part where Mom is
52:27
hanging off the edge of the building and then pulls himself
52:30
back up. Because there have been so many
52:32
times that Scout's been hanging off the edge of furniture and
52:34
hasn't been able to pull herself back up, so that was like
52:38
fantasy fulfillment for her. Damn, I thought I had it for
52:41
sure this time because she loves that stuff.
52:45
She really does. She loves hanging out in like
52:47
the sink right after we've washed dishes.
52:49
She's like, this is nice and warm and just in the bathroom.
52:51
A little scouty sauna. Yeah, like, especially like when
52:54
you're running hot water. She'll go and hang out in the
52:56
bathroom with you. She's like Steam.
52:58
Steam. We're doing Steam, yeah.
52:59
Love it. Who'd you relate to?
53:03
Ohh boy, I'll relate to Dennis, 'cause I like baseball.
53:08
It's all relate to Jane 'cause I studied psychology.
53:12
Ohh, I did too, yeah. Yeah, that's kind of how we met.
53:15
Kind of. Kind of okay.
53:21
Do we have like a dream sequel idea for this?
53:24
Like what would you wanna do for a sequel to this?
53:29
Well, we never actually. Did we get confirmation that mom
53:31
died, or did he just pass out? I don't think we did.
53:35
I don't think Mom actually died. I think, like, do we get Mom now
53:38
as like, Mom the villain? Mom and Mitch are, Yeah.
53:41
Mom takes over for Mitch and then in 20 years, Kiki's
53:46
daughter. Yeah, which is just the same
53:49
actor. Yeah, yeah.
53:50
She comes in and you know, a similar antics and zoo and the
53:56
band is cut. Except the building is no longer
53:59
abandoned. It's an actual legit running
54:01
hospital now, and nobody's questioning why this limping
54:04
zombie of a man dude is there. It's a fucking Children's
54:07
Hospital and it's called Tina's Tots.
54:09
Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yeah, okay there.
54:12
We go. I like it.
54:14
And he took his hand. And he still has Judy's hand
54:19
too. He has.
54:20
He latches on to Judy because it reminds him of his daughter.
54:24
And like a girlfriend. He's got a key chain with all of
54:27
his toes on it, like a lucky rabbit's foot, but it's his own
54:31
toes. Yeah.
54:32
Yeah. Okay.
54:33
Yeah, sure. Okay.
54:36
All right, I've got a review here.
54:38
Okay. I went with of someone of
54:43
extreme love. Okay.
54:45
So okay. This person rated it a 10 out of
54:48
10 on IMDb and this is how it goes.
54:53
I am somewhat of a fan of bad horror movies.
54:55
A guilty pleasure I suppose one would call it.
54:58
I love this movie. The first time I rented it,
55:00
someone had taped over all but the first half hour, so I saw
55:04
just enough to hook me into a several year hunt for the full
55:07
video. Is he sure that somebody taped
55:10
over all of the first half hour? Is that just like his assumption
55:14
because of how off the rails it goes?
55:16
Yeah, maybe. I don't know.
55:18
Maybe it's like the movie within the movies.
55:19
Like, man, somebody taped over this thing, taped this movie in
55:22
there. So when I saw it, I was elated
55:26
to find a movie that didn't take it so off at all seriously.
55:29
It does not. The people who made this movie
55:32
knew it was bad and they didn't care.
55:34
Why? Because it's fun.
55:36
The evil character in this movie has the most wonderful comedic
55:38
lines and he commits his as he commits his villainy.
55:42
The other characters are totally stereotypes taken from every
55:45
slasher movie made. I suggest everyone who is a fan
55:48
of off beat B OK it's probably a V grade movies.
55:52
Check this out. Listen, I don't disagree with
55:56
him that it's fun. I just think they needed to
55:58
focus only on the fun and not try and turn it into if not,
56:02
everything has to be feature length.
56:03
Yeah, I get it. Like you want it to be a feature
56:05
length movie, but you need to either write more things or just
56:07
accept that it's not. Yeah, you gotta.
56:09
Yeah, exactly. Like write more.
56:12
I I generally enjoy this. I just enjoy it more.
56:15
If it's 30 or 40 minutes, yeah. I mean, even like with $90,000
56:19
you can do that. Especially in the 80s.
56:21
Like, look at the fucking terror fire movies.
56:23
Yeah. Like, I don't know.
56:26
Whatever those. Aren't in the 80s?
56:28
No, exactly. That's what I'm saying.
56:29
There's less money like in comparison.
56:31
Let's say Oh, OK, OK, OK, Yeah. That's what you're saying.
56:34
OK. So yeah, that person really
56:38
liked the movie. All right, So the tituary
56:41
question. To be or not to be.
56:45
So I'm gonna say, yeah, I'll watch it again.
56:48
I'll probably watch it again. I'll probably give it another
56:50
shot. I really do want to see how I
56:52
feel about this upon second viewing.
56:54
I I would watch it again and I would recommend others watch it.
56:57
Yeah, if you like bad movies, like, yeah, sure, like it's a
57:01
bad movie, but it's also fun and it does not take itself
57:04
seriously. Listen, I think almost every
57:06
movie is worth at least one watch.
57:08
This one I feel like is worth multiple.
57:11
Yeah. OK, yeah, yeah.
57:12
At. Least two.
57:13
Maybe more. Maybe two or three.
57:15
Maybe. Like the story finally starts to
57:16
make sense. Yeah, you know, maybe.
57:19
Or you just like, you stop focusing on the fact that
57:22
there's no, like once you go into it and you know what you're
57:24
expecting, you can just have fun with it.
57:26
Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
57:29
OK, so that's it for this week's, for this month's to be
57:31
or not to be. We still have our main episode,
57:35
High tension coming out this coming Thursday.
57:38
So be on LOLCA for that. And as we talked about at the
57:41
beginning of the month, we do have a Patreon, the beginning of
57:47
the episode, we do have a Patreon.
57:50
All of our proceeds for this month are going towards the
57:52
Trevor Project, which will be matching that with our own
57:54
money. And if you choose to make any
57:57
independent donations, you can do so and share proof to either
58:01
us or Robert Piatone. All that information will be in
58:04
our show notes and if you have the highest.
58:09
Like donation amount, Robert will send you his full
58:12
collection of books signed personally by him.
58:14
Yeah so. And if you also join our
58:17
Patreon, though, you can be like a cool kid like Eric and Bebe if
58:22
shaking out Scared Joe Freaka Tron.
58:24
As is his full name, Amber or Michael.
58:27
Yeah. Or rather, Amber and Michael.
58:29
Amber. Yes, yeah, they're.
58:31
All, yeah, they're all there. They're all there.
58:34
Yeah, we appreciate you guys. You guys are awesome.
58:36
I'm curious to know if any of you guys watch this movie.
58:40
Just anybody in, but especially you guys.
58:42
Yeah, I'm curious. Okay.
58:45
So you can find us on social media.
58:47
Our Twitter's least favorite pod.
58:49
Instagram. Least favorite scary movie
58:50
podcast Facebook. What's your least favorite scary
58:52
movie? Our websites, what should we say
58:55
to scarymovie.com? And if you could just give us a
58:58
little rating or like a subscribe on whatever platform
59:02
that you're listening on and that does a lot, goes a long way
59:06
to helping us. It tells the algorithms that
59:09
we're worth listening to you. Yeah.
59:10
So if you think we are, we would appreciate that.
59:15
Just ask them. Please.
59:18
Yeah, please. Please, Mom.
59:20
Yeah, I'm on. Oh, God.
59:22
Okay. All right, we gotta go.
59:23
So we're gonna talk about high tension now.
59:25
We'll see you guys next time. Bye.
59:27
Bye.