Latest / Raised Different: An Elephants Podcast / "K", Hold the Door, Then Get Off the Elevator
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- Elephants: and these young people have their iPhones, the Or whatever smart fancy phones they have. You have it too. I know. But to me, okay is fine. K is fine. Okay is okay. Okay. So we're gonna start just putting the letter K and see how everybody feels about The start is a group chat called Elephants, which makes sense. Because we never forget and because nobody knows when to let it go. Welcome back to Raise Different. I'm really excited to get into some stuff with y'all today. Ooh, what kind of stuff? So our elephant in the room topic to start off with is something that creates a lot of controversy amongst us. Okay. Is it's the letter K sent in a text okay? Sounds like a weird way to ask that question. How do you feel about just a single letter response? I I just want an answer. Okay. K is an answer. Okay. That's like I don't know. I'd probably rather just give you a thumbs up in the like to the message. I would prefer that over getting a K. Okay. Explain to me. What is the issue with K? Why why is that so aggressive? How is a thumbs up not aggressive? She's getting aggressive now. Saying it to like a person like in person, it's like like you don't you don't mean that answer. What am I supposed say to that? So do you It's like saying fine. Or sure. yeah. Wait a second. Is sure not okay? No. I do that a lot. Is sure not okay? According to some people I work with, I have heard that when I respond sure, it is not. Does it have that much much emphasis on? Like tell me what you really mean. Sure. Sure. That they they don't like it. That's interesting. 'Cause it's not a it's not like positive. But if you ask me something, I'd probably go sure. Yeah, I don't mind sure. But it's like saying can I do or like saying fine is like okay. No. It's fine. It's fine. Is it though? Is it really? I'm fine. Are you really? No. Exactly. So if I reply in the elephant's chat, K I'd be like, are you okay? There's hard feelings there. Yes. Saudi's gonna be mad at you. That's what I just heard. Or like, how do you want me to respond to them? But what if you're asking or telling giving me information? It almost gives you impression that that that you're in a bad mood or something. Yeah. Like maybe you're not up for it. I mean, you're not feeling the conversation. Evan could be the case. Whatever. So then it would be appropriate to use it, that's how you really feel. But I use it all the time. Why do you choose to use it? K and OK. Because it's the simplest form of response. Because it's the easiest thing to cry. O K A Y. Okay. Yes. No, that's too many letters. No. Yeah. I don't need to spell it out. Yes. No. Yes. I disagree. I think spelling it out is appropriate. I would even put like exclamation at the end and be like, yeah, okay. I would just put yeah. That's way too much excitement. That is so much typing. Yeah. I I'm back to I'm gonna give you a thumbs up. That's K is unacceptable. I'm gonna do a thumbs up. Does K, because she grew up in the T9 era era. yeah, and it was T nine. And you had to like Saudi doesn't know what T Nai is. How many how many button presses was a K, the letter K? I don't know. I never learned T Night. It was every three letters. K L N. So it was A B C I was right. K L N It's the first one then. So then it's probably one of the Which is why K is acceptable. Yes, K L N 'cause it was quick. 'Cause you you'd have to you know you have did you know this, Sadia? Yes, did. okay. I never used one myself. See you youngins don't understand that we had we had to work for a text message. And do you remember? Well maybe you didn't because you were homeschooled. I was old. So in school, Shelley, if you didn't know, you had a phone and you would like do under the desk and you got to where you knew how where the letter like where the letters were and how many presses without even looking at the pad. I was So by the time I got my first cell phone, I was in college. Same. And I was paying for it myself and it was like per message or per letter or Well, per letter. What kind of clam were you on? I don't know. I think she had it right per message. Per message. So I I don't know, I was just really careful with how much I sent. Plus I never memorized the whole T nine thing, so my messages were very short. K was probably appropriate. Yeah. Yeah. I think you have a point. Mm-hmm. We're and these young people have their iPhones, the Or whatever smart fancy phones they have. You have it too. I know. But to me, okay is fine. K is fine. Okay is okay. Okay. So we're gonna start just putting the letter K and see how everybody feels about it. Well I think we've No the bloom is is off the rose at this point. I think we have Sadi said no. So if I want to drive you up the wall I put it okay. Yeah. You probably shouldn't have told me that. 'Cause I can't wait. She just gives us a thumbs up. Mm-hmm. I would prefer that. Cause you took more effort into setting that than you sent the K. More effort? How is it more effort? Because you have to you have to hard press and select which one you're based on your favorite favorite ones. You think I have favorite ones? I'm just like Yeah. It gives you yeah, doesn't it give you like, I don't know, five three or four or five of your favorites that have the thumbs hard press? You have the thumbs down, you have the love, you have the ha ha. You have a thumbs down? I don't have thumbs down in my regular repertoire. You must have thumbs down things. Well maybe she changed her. I it's probably she would be a popular thumbs down. Right? You have a love You're a popular thumbs down. Maybe I did them all. I do. I I'm gonna give a thumbs down right now as we speak. There. Well now you know what's appropriate. Thumbs up, thumbs down is okay. Just don't say K. Just don't say K. Can I say okay? Okay. Like the two letters? No, you have to spell it out. OK A Y exclamation point. I could do it. This is ridiculous. No. If you're really excited, you need the exclamation point. Yes. If you really mean it. Like you're in it to win it. Exclamation point. Exclamation point. That's what emojis are for. Okay, send me an emoji. Send me a gift. All about these gifts. my gosh, I could have a whole conversation. The gifts in me with a read that and the toss and chase to me. I was so stressed. I was like, This is not a laughing matter. I'm such an old person I f it was recording our whole conversation right now. Evan. I'm sorry. my gosh. She doesn't even know how to use her own phone. It happens when Yeah, I have entire conversations with my siblings in gifts only. Wait, is it gifts? It's not Jiffy's or jiffies. Jippies? Is it peanut butter or jiffs? I think gif. I've always thought it was gif. GIF. Is it meme or memes? It's a meme! I remember when I first started hearing that word and or seeing that word, I was like, what is this memey stuff? I don't get it. It was like last week. No. Last year. I'm sorry. So so heard verdict, where do we stand on the K is not okay. So we got one for not okay. K is fine. K is fine. Fine is not okay. I'm okay with fine. K is fine with me too. K sounds like sure, sure's okay. No, okay, that's like saying, are you okay? I'm fine. Hey, we're just doing herd verdict. I'm allowed to have my opinion. Okay, fine. She's not fine, by the way. She's not fine. She's not fine. Christina, where are you standing? spelled out. So you're not okay with K? Not okay with K. K is not okay. Two against two against two is. I never thought I'd align with Shelley. I think we need the listeners to break this up for us. I really do. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good idea. K A. All right, it's time to weigh in. Okay. How do you feel about the letter K in text? That is the ultimate question here. Yeah. Yes, because we need a tiebreaker and Yeah. Let us know. Is it sincere? Make sure you're liking and subscribing at the same time. All right. evan: Join the herd. Follow us on socials and become part of our family. Elephants: Unwritten rules about being a human. Unwritten human rules. So I have some examples to get your juices flowing. All right, let's do it. you shouldn't be calling people after 9 p.m. unless it's an emergency. I know Shelley, you'd be all about that one. Absolutely. If someone lets you merge in traffic, you wave. Yes. yes. Then you do a whole hand so they know that you're doing a wave and not flipping them off. Yes. You never take the last piece of something like cake or I don't know, if you have like dinner, a casserole or something, without asking first. These are just examples. We can come back to them. Argue them. I don't know if I agree with this one. If you're invited to dinner you don't show up empty handed. My bad, Christina. My bad. This is this is probably the most you don't FaceTime without warning. You know Which I feel like that's kinda we w where we work we use teams. Yeah. And I feel like that's kind of become a thing that hey, do you have a second and I'm always like w I never I never asked them before when I would pick up the phone and call. So why am I gonna see them? But did they were also at work and we knew they were or it like in the physical presence of someone. in your in your office. I'm not gonna be like, hey, I'm gonna pop into your office. Yeah, you don't preface. Yeah, we got pop ins all the time. Just do it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like our generation we didn't grow up we didn't FaceTime, right? It wasn't normalized. We texted, it wasn't normal. So FaceTime is still while we use it all the time, it's still like a new thing that we've learned. And Then I see this younger generation and Saudi, they might be older than you. that just like FaceTime each other and do but don't ask. Do you FaceTime people, Sadia? Mm-hmm. Do you ask first? No. See? I think they grew up with it and it's okay. It's just like my way of just calling someone. I'm not gonna be like, I'm gonna call you real quick and then just call you. See, I would preface with o'clock I'm about to call you 'cause none of us like to talk on the phone. I just assume it's a butt dial. If one of y'all calls me, I kind of assume that it's an accident. Which is why we have to preface. I do pick up the phone when you call me. thank you. I have to call you like ten times before you finally realize it's for real. It it usually means something's wrong. When Sadia calls me, her mom's missing, basically. Yeah. Which is what I thought. When you called me the other day, it's a weekend. So I was like, so obviously Christina's not with me. So I was like, something must be really wrong. She can't find her mom. Yeah. Nope. Wasn't the case. So I was happy, Christina, you were found. Thanks. I appreciate that. She wasn't missing. She wasn't missing. Appreciate that. So my My best friend is younger than me. And she Cougar. Huh? What did she say? Cougar? And she is currently dating somebody. And one thing that I've noticed about him is that he just randomly FaceTimes her. Like out of the blue all the time. I'm like, why are you FaceTiming? What happened to people and just texting all the time? I just you know, it feels intrusive. Honestly, I think that's why if s if one of y'all were to FaceTime me, I would FaceTime you now. I would totally hang up. Or I wouldn't answer. Hurry fast. Decline, decline, decline. What do want to say to me? Just text me. Yeah. Why are you calling me? Yeah. What if I need to see your face? Why do you need to show Why do you need to see my face? Because I need to show you something and it's really important. Okay, that's different. But you would probably be like, I need to show you something. Or hello. We send pictures back and forth all the time. Like what do you think of this outfit? my gosh. That makes me think about voice memos now are becoming a thing where people instead of texting they voice their text. Like am I saying that right now? I will do that with my best friend. I will do voice memos. No. I don't think I have rants yet. If I need to rant or vent about something, I will Or if like I really need my tone to come across. Yes. I'll do like girl. She just gave me a thumbs up in real life. No, I did not. That was a thumbs down. I mean a thumbs down. Saudi is having a moment. I'm sorry. I envisioned a thumbs up. Baby brain. Everything's good in her life. Yeah, I don't I don't think you need to FaceTime. I don't think it's needed. No, me and my bestie FaceTime like once a day. Once a day? Yeah. Dang, I don't even call my mom that much. I call my mom like three times a day. I you've got tracks. Hi mommy. Yes. And those are calls, so it's not it's not always video. Yeah. I think the only person I truly talk on the on the phone with is Jonathan. Jonathan. That's the only person I talk on the phone with FaceTime Jonathan. So Hi love. Okay. And I might talk to Ellen like once a week. But probably 'cause she calls you. She does. Yeah. Are these like phone calls or are these FaceTimes with these people? No, no FaceTime. I can't tell you the last time I FaceTime some I can't I I don't know if I'd ever FaceTime with someone. I FaceTime Mark if I'm out of town. But usually because I have the boys. You forget what his face looks like. I need a FaceTime you, I don't remember what you look like. No, but I I don't like talking on the phone, so if I'm going to talk to somebody I'd much rather see them. So if I'm out of town So isn't it a little too contradicting? Like if I if I videoed you No, because I talked to You mean she doesn't want to see you. We text. you don't you don't normally pick up the phone and call me and be like, Hey Shelley, what's up? How's your day? But we also don't text that way either. I don't say in the group chat, hey guys. How's your day? Yeah, but if I have something to say, I just text you. No, it's like a our elephant chat is basically a Facebook but just for four people. Yeah. It's just sharing of thoughts and ideas and information. There's no there's no start or end to conversation. Yeah, we don't say good morning and good night. We just the conversation never ends. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. So I text. That's my form of communication. We need to change this. Why? I think we're I'm gonna do a group FaceTime one day. I will not be answering. I don't mind FaceTime. Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I wanna bring it back. COVID, we actually did get together a couple times. Yeah. Through WhatsApp or something. Yeah. There was a game app that we used. Yeah. Yeah. That was fun. That lasted a long time, huh? That was fun. What happened to that? I don't remember what game it was. We don't need it anymore. We see each other every day now, whether we're in person or not. We could still be in it wherever you're at in the world and still connect. Yeah. Yes. You know? And I think it's great, like, I know you have family that that don't live here, so it's great that you get to see them. And I don't and I also don't don't tell them, Hey, I'm about to FaceTime you. I just don't answer. Mm-hmm. So I will quickly decline if I'm not in a place to chat. See, and I fully support that. I don't think I don't think FaceTime or Teams call needs a Warning. An introduction. Yeah, a warning. Because I feel like it's still a phone call. So if you don't want to answer, you just don't answer it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And if it's super important, then I'll just send you a text. Okay, so how do y'all feel when you go out places and somebody calls you and do you put on speaker or do you put it to your phone? To your ear? No. To my ear. Nine times out of ten I will decline the call if I'm out and about. Unless Unless not your emergency contact, I just want to point out. Yeah. Well If I'm if I'm at dinner and also not your emergency contact. Okay. If it okay, valid. I think I would agree. If you just call me once and I'm not in a place, I will probably decline it. If you call me again, I'm a pickup. Yeah, I'll probably pick up. This is also true. Yeah. Because I've it's like I grew up in the era where we had a telephone on the wall. And so if I go out I don't wanna be on my phone when I'm at dinner with people or even when I'm at home at my own kitchen table. We have a rule in our house, no electronics at the table. And so my phone is usually not at the table when we have dinner. So if you call or FaceTime me or text me, I'm probably not gonna answer you until I look at my phone again. Hence why I probably miss so many texts, phone calls, et cetera. Well that's 'cause you also never know where your phone is. That's true. Yeah. Or you leave it in the fridge. She's not normal with her phone. I did that today actually. I was like, I don't know where my phone is. If anyone on the herd knows Christina, they know that she's left her phone in the fridge. Yep. She's left it at home. And not turned back for it. Yeah, she's left it at home and not gone back for it. Just go to work. Ridiculous. I think she's left it on all of our office desks at some point in time. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Back for it eventually. Yeah. Or somebody will find me with it. Yeah. I mean I I it's great that you're not attached to your phone. When it starts barking at us, we're like, Christina's phone is in my office. Because she never puts it on vibrate. No that my god, that's the other weird thing about people with phones. I don't think my phone, like the minute I'm on vibrate now, guys. Come on. Who has the ringer on ever? Who in here has their has ever has put their ringer on in the last week? I need it on. Me. All day. I I got a new phone. And you still miss things. I got a new phone, so mine was on the other day. But normally the last phone I have, I don't think it would ever come off vibrate. Yeah. No, I need it on. No, mine's permanently on silence. Then I do. You miss it now. The ringer does not help you, ma'am. That is a fact. Yeah. That is a fact. Yeah. Like when you came in and told me Shelly's messaging us, I was like, a the ringer was on. And I just and you looked at it, but you didn't respond to me. No, I only looked at it. Before she had even looked no, she hadn't even looked at it yet. I went in and told her, Hey, Shelly's texting and she answered me verbally and then went on what she was doing. I was like, Yes, but are you gonna answer Shelly? She's not here to hear your answer. She's the one asking. No. I was like, no. Yes. It takes effort to be texting people all the time. Sometimes it does, yeah. And and there are some people that I will leave on unread until I'm ready to respond. So how long how long is appropriate to leave someone undelivered? Do y'all have y'all's read receipts on? No. You do. I do? Yeah. I don't. I didn't even know. Mine are not. Mine are none. I don't want you to know if I read it or not. I don't I know. I don't think it's any of your damn business. 'Cause sometimes I'll accident like accidentally open it and I'm not ready to respond. Yes. Yeah. Not ready to see it pop up and I'm like, I am not ready to answer that question. So how long is okay? I'm I think it depends on the time of day. Like the phone call past nine PM. If it's after nine PM You could wait till tomorrow. Yeah, you could wait till tomorrow. And if I mess up what it is at six o'clock in the morning is because you messaged me late. Mm-hmm. So I'll respond when I'm ready. Is that why you always respond to me at six in the morning? She does not respond at six in the morning. She's not at six in the morning. Christina are you talking about is what I wanna know. Because I don't know who that Christina is. Seven thirty, maybe. Maybe. my gosh. I I think I usually try to respond by the next day. Usually. If I send you a text message at two PM, you won't respond to me to the next day. It depends on the text and who it's from. I hope it's not an emergency site. I like twelve hours. How many I would go to like a twelve hour limit. Otherwise you're just not gonna hear from me for like weeks. Depends on how much I don't want to We're probably not we're probably not that Like But I feel like I'm also I have a I'm forgetful and I'll be like, I'll come back to that and then I'm never gonna come back to that. Like let's be honest. If I don't respond when I see it to most people Well, you know, you can preview it. Mm-hmm. And so I can usually tell what it's about and I'm like, I'm not ready to have that conversation conversation. Okay, so at what point at what point does a text need to be turned into a voice combo? I I think if there's l a lot of emotion. I d I don't know. I don't know. I think you know with certain people it's different. Well, and there's some people that I I just know to call, like Your mom. Like my mom. I call my mom or she calls me kind. Because I mean her text messages are like Okay. Where where at? Question mark. Like I'm at home doing what? Question mark. I'll call you. So I I feel like there's when my dad was alive I called my dad. I called my stepmom. You know, there's certain people that you call. Okay. But I can't think of anybody else that I would just pick up the phone and call. Where do you draw that line? Which one? When it's time to just pick up the phone and call somebody. I try my best not to. Okay. You know what I just thought about? So my husband and I are ten years apart. And if I need to tell him something, I will text him. Okay. He will call me. Do you have a few minutes? I'm at work. No, I don't have a few minutes. I'm like, well, I have like a minute. Okay, well, I just wanted to tell you about such and such. And I was like, Really? You couldn't just text me that message? No, I just wanted to make sure you knew. I would have read the text eventually. But I think that's that's the difference between the age gap. The age gap, right? Like he just prefers he prefers to pick up the phone and call somebody. Yeah. Where I'm like, just just text me. That makes sense. Yeah. Makes no sense. If I need an answer right now, like this past weekend, I'm going to pick up the phone. I don't have time to wait for you to read it and then think about your response. And then send me a text and then now I gotta read it. Well and it's your interpretation of the text. I think the situation of this weekend needed needed more context. Yeah, sometimes you can't give all the context through Yeah. A whole book before I can get to the actual question I'm trying to get to. I do have a feeling about If if my text message takes up the whole screen, I think that was probably a phone call. Yeah. Or an in person conversation. That's fair. Yeah. But I I tend to not communicate that way through text. So remember K. So keep it short. Yeah. Yeah. Short and sweet. Yeah. Yeah. If I it takes me too long to type it out, then yeah. It it requires a phone call. Next time I see you I'll probably just postpone postpone that whole thing. Yeah. Whatever it was. It must not have been bet that important. Yeah. We'll pick it up later. At a later time. My best friend and I meet once a week so we can chat. We go buy a tea and sit and talk. Spill the tea. And so we'll like save stuff, right? Like all week long we're like, Girl, I have so much to tell you about what happened with such and such this week. I'm like, I can't wait till Wednesday. Yeah. And our lives are too busy to call each other every night. So Would you? Would I call her? Every night? Probably not every night. I mean we do call every once in a while if there's like I need to vent and I need to talk to somebody right now. So We will. Call every once in a while. Alright, well the original topic that got way out of hand. Yeah, what was the original topic? Was unwritten rules of being a human. We only talked about one. Well, it was just an example. D face face timing without a warning, but do you have any unwritten rules? Okay, so simple ones. if you're walking out of an establishment and somebody's behind you, do you hold the door or you let it slam in their face? Hold the door. This happens. People out there in the world. I'm like, I'm right behind you. Okay, right behind, yes. But I feel like there's a statute of limitation. It is an awkward time. Like There is an awkward time. There is an awkward time. Like if I have to run to get the door because you're holding it for me, I also think it's like Yeah. Not just like be aware, like look back to see. Yeah, it is literally like two steps behind you. Like, are you serious? You didn't like really? The door's gonna slam in my face? Obviously, I'm not gonna let it, but like that's just people are just unaware. But if I'm holding the door and like I don't want you to rush, then I'm gonna politely like you know, let it go and you're probably noticing that I at least made an effort. I think that counts for some. I don't know. More than ten feet. I don't need to hold the door for you. Yeah. I feel like that's my happy place. Mm-hmm. Yeah, don't make it awkward. Yeah, I don't want to make it weird. Don't make it awkward. Yeah. Kind of like that makes sense. Hugging when you leave people. That's very cultural though. I feel like in our culture we hug everyone when we greet them and we hug everyone when we leave. Yeah. I don't I don't think in our culture We're white people. We don't we don't have any feelings. You're like So not gonna say that. As an Eastern European person. As a Latina. Yeah. I I always tell the story about when I met my husband's family. It was like sitting at the table with my big fat Greek wedding, the movie. It was just loud and there were ten conversations going and everybody was in everybody's business. And I was just like, is this? And there was like it felt like there were 50 people in the room. And you know, we sit at our table. We're like, how was your day today? Can you please pass the cheese? And at Shelly's house they have plates of cheese on the table. I feel like we always had cheese on the table. That's funny. Okay. Unspoken rule when the elevator doors open, you wait for the people to get out before you get in. Yes. I think we can all agree to that one. Yes. Yeah. Common courtesy. I don't know how many times I have been in the elevator, the doors have opened, and people just walk in. And I'm like, I need to get off of this bus. I don't let me out. And they they just like crowd in, like, my gosh, she's gonna leave without me. Okay, but can I can I point out the elephant in the room? What is the elephant in the room? Have you ever had the doors open though and and it's like you're You don't know what floor you're on? No no no. god, I have we had that happen. No, I'm thinking like the door is open and you're just so about getting on the elevator that you put a step in the box before you realize someone else is trying to get off. I'm so sorry. And then it's awkward because you're like, Well I'm I'm already halfway in there, so do I just keep getting on and let them get off or do I back all the way up? Your momentum is going so far that it's I think it depends on how far you're in the elevator. Yeah, there's a st There's a foot in the box. Right? Like don't make it awkward. So if you're already in I've done that before where I've walked in and I'm like, my gosh, I'm so sorry I didn't see you and But the fact that you're saying sorry, you're you're already saying that it's wrong. Yeah. Yeah. I I acknowledge 'cause that talk about pet peeves. That is mine. Don't make me ride this elevator again. What is some other one? it's like don't make group plans when not everyone who's present is invited. what? Don't even Don't even Shelly. Or maybe don't make group plans when not everybody is there to participate. Like period. In making the plans. if the And then expect them to have the calendar cleared. But then you make plans and you're like, by the way, we're doing this. I'm like, but I'm not available. And then y'all have social calendars so deep. And then y'all get mad because they don't go. Yeah. Yes. I think that's appropriate. Inappropriate. How do y'all feel about people answering phone calls or leaving the ringer on or texting in a movie? turn it off. Altogether. I think in general, if you're in public, why do you have your phone on with the speaker on, watching something that I don't care about? That's th so mean. And then talking to somebody. Yeah. Like I understand wanting to hear the video you're watching or whatever. Maybe you maybe you hold the phone up to your ear and you're listening. blah. Everyone can watch the video. It's like, can I just go look over your shoulder? 'Cause I can hear it. Yeah, I I feel like come watch it with me. I don't feel like that irritates me as much as people that talk Have a conversation on speaker phone in a public place. I I would do that. You do that? Christina Christina I it's not Shame. I know Okay, and then do you always like do you always have to preface, you're on speaker to the person? If I'm in the car and I answer the phone, 'cause that's probably the only time you're gonna be on speaker around other people, I will say you're on speaker. Don't say anything. You don't want so and so to hear. Yeah, you wouldn't want others to hear. 'Cause you called me to be in my ear and now you're not and you don't know that. Yeah. That's fair. Yeah. Yes. Don't say anything ugly. Any other unwritten rules? Feel like these are just I mean, we have in this group, which you will hear about in another episode, we have a lot of restroom rules. So many. So I didn't want to get into those 'cause I feel like we've already we've already took a hot take on those. Like skip a stall, things like that. Over, not under. Yeah. Over is the correct way. Yeah, you'll find out about that later. Yep. Hot takes. I'm gonna think about so many other human human yeah, unwritten rules. I think there's a lot out there. There's a lot of stuff that societ societally I don't even know if that's a word. Society? Society? No, like societal. Yeah. Rules that we do a lot of assuming that everyone aligns with them. And I think about the four of us who are around each other a lot. And we don't usually align, so can you imagine just the average Joe off the street? But we're really good at pointing it out like well yeah. It feels like a sign filled episode on a regular basis. It's like we experience experience this when we like go on a run or something, at a race or something. People should be walking on the right and running on the left. So move out of the way. Mm-hmm. So just little norms like that. sometimes are annoying. Mm-hmm. Or walking down like at the grocery store, if you have a basket, like it's the same rules apply on the road. Like you you go on the right side, flow of traffic. So you're not like the whole road's taken up by people going all one direction. And that one person's trying to come in the middle. Yeah. Like try to move over. Yeah. Well and I find it so my kids are younger But they're old enough to take care of themselves and like they need to be learning these things. So sometimes they do stuff and I'm like, Are you even my kid? Why'd you do that? Yeah, like the other day their grandmother was leaving and my kids were sitting on the couch. And he didn't even look up and he was like, Bye, Mamma. I was like, No, no, no, no. Get up off the couch and put whatever you're messing with down. Go look them in the eye and say goodbye. It I feel like some of these unspoken rules to me are just common courtesy things. Like it's it's rude to be talking on your phone in a crowded restaurant or it's rude to have your speaker on watching something annoying. Shame. In the middle of a doctor's office. I won't answer if that's the case, right? So it all depends on like where I'm at. But it's the videos you're watching. Yeah. Being loud. Well, okay, I'm used to it. Usually it's like quiet, so I don't know. But if there's something like I need to be able to s watch that video, I have to turn it on. I don't have my earphones. Why do you have to watch the video right then? Did you just say airphones? She said earphones. I see what you were doing there. Like headphones and earbuds. Earbuds. I can never I can never remember earbuds. I'm always like my earphone my earpod. My hair. I don't know. I'm like my earpieces. At some point I'm just like hearing aids. No, my earpods are always in my purse. They're always on my body. Yeah, she's so good about having them all the time. Not me. No. I usually only take them with me when I travel. That's it? So I have learned the art of watching things without the sound on. my gosh, sometimes the sound makes it Most of them have closed captions. no, not the same, Shelley. And I will send videos to my best friend and I'm always like, look, I didn't listen to it. I just watched it and it was funny. So if there's something inappropriate, sorry, my bad. No. AirPods are always with me. No. I always think I'm gonna start taking them places because, you know, sometimes I'm like, maybe I wanna listen to something while I'm out doing whatever. And I usually never end up doing that. I'm usually fine with the noise around me. But are other people fine with the noise around? That you're inflicting on this. I probably don't even care 'cause I'm never gonna see them again. Plus they do weird things too. Like I was standing in line the other day, just minding my own business, and then some suddenly somebody walks by and they stink. bad. Okay, and then do they create dust here? That's an unwritten rule of Christina's. They were smelled so bad. Christina has Christina has the nose. Yeah. you smell things that I No, it was bad. If Saudi's smelled You're also pregnant. It was really bad. The nose nose. It was like there is no reason in this type of place that you should be smelling like that. I mean maybe maybe T J Max. They just got off of work and they needed to go pick something up. And they work labor. Like work that's outside. It wasn't even like sweaty, like It was awful. It was like five day old must. Wait, five day old what? Must. Must. What what is it? What is it? What is the word? Musk. Musk musk. No, 'cause when someone sell smells musty, you don't say someone sell smells musky. I might get made fun for that if I said that. It's it's now I don't know what it is. It's musty. And then do you say musty or musky? Musty is usually something I say like the room smells musty. And someone can smell musty too. Someone's musk is their like their their scent. Yeah. Yeah. Their smell. Yeah. Ugh. Some people smell. They need to wash their stank stank. Some people do just smell. I mean You know, I work from home and when I'm in a meeting I like to work out and I usually sweat a lot. But imagine that marinating for five days. I can't even handle it. I'm like, I need to take a shower now. Marinating. There's some interesting word choices. Five day old is marinated. unwritten social rules: Alright everyone, so that wraps us up today. Before we go, let what some of your social norms are. Whatever they might be, let us know in the chat of wherever you're listening from. And also follow us on socials. Tell us about it there as well. We can't wait to hear what you have say. Bye for now.