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THE MIDLIFE RESET BUTTON: STARTING FRESH WITHOUT STARTING OVER · Uncluttered and Unfiltered: The Podcast For Women Over 50

• 0:04
  Welcome to Uncluttered and Unfiltered, the podcast urging
• 0:08
  you to let it go and don't look back, with nationally acclaimed
• 0:12
  professional organizer Christine Stone and self-proclaimed Hot
• 0:17
  Damn Mess radio and TV personality Eden Kendall.
• 0:21
  Welcome to Uncluttered and Unfiltered, and I don't know if
• 0:25
  we get or give ourselves enough credit, but we are a couple of
• 0:30
  Gen. X on the border of boomers
• 0:31
  trying to do a podcast using technology and it takes us way
• 0:36
  too long to get it figured out before I mean literally every
• 0:40
  time. Every time.
• 0:41
  Every single time. I mean, it's really bananas, but
• 0:46
  we we figured it out finally. This time it was on my end.
• 0:49
  Sometimes it's on yours, mostly it's on mine.
• 0:51
  Exactly. But we we don't ever know.
• 0:54
  OK, So anyway, anyway, welcome. We're going to talk about doing
• 0:56
  resets and what does that mean to reset yourself?
• 1:00
  Well, we'll talk about what that means.
• 1:02
  But our new way of doing things in this fourth season of this
• 1:05
  podcast is that we start out with what is on our radar.
• 1:09
  So whether that's something on current event related or TV
• 1:12
  shows or books or movies or just products we like.
• 1:16
  So would you like to start? OK, I will start.
• 1:21
  I will start. So what's on my radar, and I
• 1:24
  don't know if you've seen this, but it is crash on the the Crash
• 1:28
  on Netflix. OK.
• 1:30
  I think it's the second season of that, right?
• 1:32
  No, it's a documentary. Oh, then no.
• 1:36
  Oh my God, really? What is it?
• 1:38
  What is it? OK, so I'm going to give a quick
• 1:41
  synopsis, just so you know, OK, it's on Netflix.
• 1:45
  It just came out last Friday. And it's about a, it's a kind of
• 1:50
  a true crime document doc. But it it's so bizarre.
• 1:55
  It's it's not really even true crime.
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  So there were three teenagers. They one was they were boyfriend
• 2:02
  and girlfriend. The other one was just a friend.
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  They were in a car coming home 30 in the morning and crashed.
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  She was driving and crashed into a building.
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  OK, going 100 miles an hour, never braked, never tried to
• 2:20
  swerve or avoid anything. So the documentary goes into it
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  first. Everyone thought it was just
• 2:26
  this horrible horrific accident, but it wasn't.
• 2:32
  It was intentional. And I'll Fast forward to, you
• 2:36
  know, they did all this kind of investigation.
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  They had the car people who can tell you exactly because there's
• 2:44
  a black box in all the cars. So the black box of the car
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  could tell exactly like even 2 weeks before she had scouted the
• 2:53
  place. It just it's just so so, so sad.
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  Now the real worst part of this is her and her parents because
• 3:06
  they are the parents that were the friends where she could note
• 3:09
  do no wrong. She was totally spoiled.
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  And so it really gave me hope because after, you know, you go
• 3:16
  down the rabbit hole, the 20 somethings were the ones saying,
• 3:21
  what kind of parents are these? And this is a no brainer when
• 3:27
  you see the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
• 3:29
  And I don't want to give it all away to everybody, but when I
• 3:32
  tell you this was so good, I mean, it's captivating.
• 3:38
  And of course, there's also on the ID channel a Mean Girls
• 3:42
  episode about it, which they don't touch on.
• 3:45
  And the Netflix start writing meaning she was not a well like
• 3:48
  person. She was a mean girl.
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  She did a lot of drugs. She promoted a lot of drugs on
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  her TikTok. They found drugs in the car.
• 4:00
  They found marijuana in her system.
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  They were mushrooms in the car. She was not a good well liked
• 4:08
  person. And they say he was breaking up
• 4:11
  with her and he had tried many times to break up with her and
• 4:17
  they would always get back together.
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  Was one of those breakup, get back together, breakup, get back
• 4:22
  together. It was a very, very toxic
• 4:24
  relationship. And she lived with him and he
• 4:27
  was three years older than her. So she met him when she was 13
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  or 14 years old and was living with him when she was like 16
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  and 17. Years.
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  So where are the parents Is a very valid question in that one.
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  They didn't care. They were like, she's old enough
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  to make her own decisions. It's really bad.
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  They didn't care that she did smoked pot.
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  They didn't care about anything. When she got trouble at school,
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  they were like, it's somebody else's fault.
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  It's not her fault. So their take is that this was
• 5:02
  just a horrible accident, but because of all the
• 5:06
  investigation, it wasn't an accident, it was intentional.
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  So murder suicide. Murder suicide.
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  Now she's in jail, so I'll just leave it at that.
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  Oh, she lived. Oh she lived, the other two
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  died. The guy in the back seat and her
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  boyfriend both died in the crash.
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  And so they have their parents on.
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  They have this crazy friend of hers who everybody is
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  unfollowing on TikTok because she's crazy.
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  Like she was defending her by saying she's a vegan and she
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  wouldn't even eat Chicken Mcnuggets.
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  So I can't imagine her doing this.
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  And they're like, what is one thing have to do with the other,
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  right? So anyway, I've been down the
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  rabbit hole. Watch two other things about it.
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  So you have to watch this because it just goes to show you
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  when parents are friends and they're not parents, what ends
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  up happening when the kids get start to get older?
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  And I used to have this debate, and I don't know if you did all
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  the time, my kids would always say mom.
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  She lets him do that because she's not like a parent, she's
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  like a friend. Why can't you be my friend?
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  Well, that's from Mean Girls. I'm not like ordinary moms, you
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  know, regular moms. I'm a cool mom.
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  Yeah, well, the cool moms, don't you know, always it's tough.
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  It's tough. It's tough when you're going
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  through the teenage years to to be very stern and strict, but
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  that's what you raise when you are.
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  Because I feel like when you try to be friends with your kids and
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  you share alcohol with them and you like, I remember my daughter
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  being 17 or 8. I don't remember 18 maybe.
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  And of course the drinking age was 18 when I was in high
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  school. So I kind of feel bad about it.
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  But she'd be like, I'm 18 and I'm like, I don't care.
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  The drinking age is 21, not 18. And of course, you know, it was
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  always like, you're so mean, you don't understand.
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  But now, you know, they're great kids.
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  So I just think that trying to be friends with your teenage
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  kids is a recipe for a disaster like this.
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  So anyway, you have to watch it. You will absolutely be mortified
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  by her attitude, the one who killed both the kids by her
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  parents and by her friends. It just, it's just like they're
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  tone deaf to what what they. Sounds like a sociopath.
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  Yeah, that's what they're saying.
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  I mean, you know, they're saying because she has no remorse
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  whatsoever. Her thing is, I don't remember
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  anything. It was an accident.
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  That's it. I don't remember anything.
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  It was an accident. But you know, when you have all
• 8:00
  the evidence that all these people have and when you're not
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  breaking at all, like at all for miles.
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  And she didn't think about all the cameras on the top of all
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  these different buildings that she was driving by.
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  They had so much video footage of her going 100 miles an hour.
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  I mean, it's so it's probably one of the most horrible things
• 8:25
  I've ever watched in in time because, you know, that's just.
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  That's Is this a new documentary?
• 8:31
  Because I just. Came out last Friday.
• 8:34
  Ah, no wonder you you've got it. Yeah, Yep.
• 8:37
  You know me. Well, I do.
• 8:39
  I do. I do.
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  So what do you have? OK.
• 8:42
  So creatine because we haven't talked about.
• 8:44
  Creatine yet? Yeah.
• 8:46
  So, and I've been taking creatine for over a year, maybe
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  even longer than that. And I want to make one thing
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  clear. Whenever we talk about anything,
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  whether it's a supplement or a vitamin or any kind of thing
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  like that, we're not physicians, We're not even, I'm not even
• 9:02
  going to quote you what I've read.
• 9:03
  And then when you ask about creatine will say, well, it's
• 9:05
  the most research supplement, blah, blah, blah.
• 9:07
  I'm not telling you it's good. I'm not telling you it's bad.
• 9:10
  It's on my radar. That's it.
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  But I will tell you my experience with it since that
• 9:15
  will at least give you a little bit of a, a base of knowledge.
• 9:18
  So the reason I started taking it as I was reading for gaining
• 9:23
  muscle, which is something I do a lot of working out.
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  And as you get older, it's very difficult to build muscle mass.
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  And it this fills your muscles with water and it's good.
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  But there are all these other things for women our age and
• 9:37
  other physicians that are saying, OK, you should be
• 9:39
  considering creatine. So I'm just going to say that,
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  but you've got to do your own research and you should always,
• 9:44
  always talk to your own physician.
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  Now there's the disclaimer. So when I first started taking
• 9:49
  it, I went and had my blood work done and my creatinine levels in
• 9:54
  my kidneys were so sky high that my doctor said I need you to go
• 9:56
  off of it for three months 3. Weeks that happened to someone
• 9:59
  else I know. And then let's retest it and
• 10:01
  make sure that they drop immediately back down.
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  And then once that's happened, you can go back on it with a
• 10:08
  lower dose and make sure you're really drinking a ton of water.
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  So that's what we did and they went right back down.
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  So I will say that, but I noticed when I went off of it
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  that it definitely affected muscle tone.
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  So I'm just saying it's on my radar now.
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  If you are a woman of in mid age and you are working out and
• 10:28
  doing these things, I would research.
• 10:30
  I'm not saying I would take, I would research creatine and see
• 10:34
  if it's something that you and your doctor or you would be
• 10:37
  interested in. Maybe you don't want it.
• 10:38
  My husband says I'm juicing. He's like, you're juicing.
• 10:40
  I'm like, it's not juicing. OK, You want to know what
• 10:43
  happened to me on it? OK, I took it and when I was up
• 10:48
  visiting my daughter and it was like the single individual
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  packets. So I started it like 2 days
• 10:55
  before I left and then I brought the like little individual ones.
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  You just put in your drink. Well, all all of a sudden I
• 11:01
  started getting the worst cystic acne all over my right here and
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  I didn't even think, I didn't even correlate the two at all.
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  So I keep doing it because I don't think it is anything, you
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  know? So I get through the weekend,
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  it's getting worse and it's getting worse.
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  And I'm like, what have I done that is causing this?
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  First of all I'm post menopause so this should not be happening.
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  But second of all, I can't remember anything I ate or
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  anything and then it dawned on me right then and there.
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  Oh my God I've been taking this creatine.
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  So I go online, I go to ChatGPT or something.
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  Can creatine cause cystic acne? And bam, creatine can cause
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  cystic and some people, not everybody.
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  Not everyone, I just. Yeah, but I'm like, OK, let me
• 11:55
  see if this is true. So I quit taking it and
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  automatically everything now it stayed around for a little bit
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  because it was so bad but automatically.
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  So what did I do? I decided to try it again.
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  So this time I was at home and I decided to try it again.
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  So I put it in my drink and I do it and I'm like OK so far so
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  good. The next morning I wake up with
• 12:18
  the busy piggy cystic acne on my chin again and I go.
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  That's it, I'm. Done.
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  Done. With you and then.
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  Creatine, you're dead to me. Yeah, you're dead to me me.
• 12:28
  So then TikTok. Told you to go back on it.
• 12:33
  No, no, she is a facialist in New York City.
• 12:38
  She does a whole entire post on how don't take creatine if you
• 12:43
  are acne prone in any way because and she gives the whole
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  explanation. I'm like Oh my God it's true.
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  It also. Oh, yeah.
• 12:52
  So don't you love when you get that kind of validation there?
• 12:54
  You're like, I knew it. I knew it, I loved it.
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  I've. I was like thank you, thank you
• 13:00
  validating me. So yeah, so and it also makes
• 13:04
  your belly bloat. So there's a lot of things about
• 13:06
  it that are not ideal. I know someone that thought they
• 13:10
  had a kidney problem and then they didn't correlate that
• 13:14
  either. And then when they went to the
• 13:16
  doctor, he was like, well, what are you doing?
• 13:18
  And the very last thing he said was creating.
• 13:21
  He's like, stop taking it. And then his levels like you, it
• 13:25
  went back down to normal. Whatever.
• 13:27
  My husband takes it. I don't gita never.
• 13:31
  That's what makes me so mad. It makes me so mad.
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  He can eat anything and not get a stomach ache.
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  He can take anything and not have any reactions.
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  He can wash his face with gasoline and it wouldn't do
• 13:47
  anything. I take one thing or do one thing
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  or forget my, you know, the soap that I use every day to wash my
• 13:56
  face, my Vanicream, bam. I mean, my face is red, my
• 14:01
  skin's irritated. It's just so irritating.
• 14:05
  My, I remember when my son was getting a haircut once and the
• 14:09
  hair stylist, he was very colorful guy and he's just like,
• 14:13
  what do you wash your hair with? And he's saying O2 in one
• 14:16
  shampoo and he's like 2 in one shampoo.
• 14:19
  Why don't you use Windex? So why don't you?
• 14:21
  But it did not affect his hair. Like it was fine if I did that.
• 14:25
  Doing that, no. Oh my God, no.
• 14:29
  Anyway, so that's, you know, my whole thing on him because he
• 14:35
  can do anything and I can do nothing without having some sort
• 14:39
  of physical reaction, skin reaction, something stomach's
• 14:44
  bothering me, you know. Something so unfair.
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  So listen, let's let's take a quick break and come back with
• 14:51
  resets. And we have more on our radar,
• 14:55
  but you'll have to wait for next week's episode to find out what
• 14:57
  they are. So we'll be right back.
• 15:45
  OK, welcome back. We're talking about resets, and
• 15:48
  we don't have necessarily a set reset.
• 15:51
  We're talking about resets in general.
• 15:53
  We asked you on our Ladies Only Uncluttered and Unfiltered page
• 15:56
  about your reset moment and I'll share those momentarily.
• 16:00
  But let's talk about our reset moments.
• 16:03
  What what to you means? What does that mean to you when
• 16:07
  I say a reset? Chris, what do you what do you
• 16:09
  think of? I feel like a reset is not like
• 16:12
  a midlife crisis. I think those are two totally
• 16:16
  different things for me, and this is what I wrote down for
• 16:20
  When I think of a real reset in your life, no matter if it's
• 16:25
  with your business, your family, whatever it is, I feel like
• 16:30
  you're just taking a breather. You're just giving yourself
• 16:35
  whether it, and there's no time limit.
• 16:38
  It could be two weeks, it could be a month, whatever you want it
• 16:41
  to be until you feel comfortable going back to a situation, you
• 16:46
  know, whatever it is. So for me, it's taking a
• 16:50
  breather and stop doing things that are frustrating you and
• 16:55
  making you annoyed. You know what I mean?
• 16:57
  Like you're going to stop doing things that really have been
• 17:01
  bothering you and to me start doing things that make you feel
• 17:09
  only good about yourself for the moment.
• 17:11
  Whether that is a glow up, meaning you go get your hair
• 17:14
  done, your nails done, a facial, a pedicure, whatever it is,
• 17:20
  Botox, whatever it is to make you feel good about yourself.
• 17:24
  If you're feeling not good about yourself.
• 17:27
  And like also could be an identity thing, like not about
• 17:32
  midlife, but you're like, why am I feeling this way?
• 17:36
  And you can't describe it. It's just a feeling and it's
• 17:41
  just taking a breather. What do you think it is?
• 17:44
  If everybody worked as hard as they work, like the day before
• 17:46
  they go on a vacation, imagine the amount of work we would get
• 17:49
  done. And so for me, for some reason,
• 17:52
  whenever I'm going to be going out of town, doesn't even matter
• 17:55
  if it's like a business trip or anything.
• 17:56
  Not like I'm doing a lot of business trips, but whatever.
• 18:01
  Any time I know I'm going to be going out of town, I tend to
• 18:04
  like want to get everything down.
• 18:05
  Like do a major purge, a goodwill hall clean, get a
• 18:10
  projects done. So even if I'm just going away
• 18:12
  for the weekend, when I come back I can feel like I'm going
• 18:14
  to reset. Yes, yes.
• 18:16
  And I, I, I also wrote focusing on your environment is part of
• 18:22
  doing a reset. And that's funny that you just
• 18:25
  said that because I, I feel that you're home can be part of
• 18:29
  what's going on that's making you feel like I just need a
• 18:33
  reset. Like I just everything in my
• 18:35
  life, whether it's my house, whatever it is.
• 18:38
  And so that's where I think people confuse A midlife crisis,
• 18:44
  but just I just need a breather. I call it a breather.
• 18:47
  Yeah, I do too. And I don't see these, only
• 18:50
  uncluttered and unfiltered page. Jackie said stopping artificial
• 18:54
  sweeteners as a health reset after unexplained abdominal
• 18:57
  pains and treated it like a personal reset.
• 19:00
  So she found out what was causing her pain and decided,
• 19:04
  OK, I'm not just going to say I'm not going to do this
• 19:06
  anymore. I'm going to, in my mind, decide
• 19:09
  that it's a reset. So really it's like a mental
• 19:11
  approach to something, yes? Renee said asks she wanted to
• 19:16
  know more like what we meant by reset and a bunch of people came
• 19:19
  in and said it could mean anything, which I love that.
• 19:21
  Jean said that she had a tune up and by tune up, I think what she
• 19:27
  was referring to was she she had some medical things going on and
• 19:33
  got tuned up because when people started to ask her like what did
• 19:36
  you get tuned up? She said well I went in for this
• 19:38
  and that and the other she had some surgery.
• 19:39
  Dina said that she started following a sleep doctor and it
• 19:46
  was a game changer that she started following online the
• 19:49
  sleep Doctor Who would give her tips on how to get better sleep
• 19:52
  Doctor Siebert. Oh, I've heard of him.
• 19:55
  OK, Doctor Sierra. Siebert.
• 19:57
  Yeah. Oh, her.
• 19:59
  Her. Is it her?
• 20:00
  I don't know. It's SAYRA Christine, said
• 20:04
  another Christine. One day a week of raw juice
• 20:08
  fasting, and that's the reset every single week.
• 20:11
  That's interesting. Sherry said she retired.
• 20:14
  Well, that'll do it, Miranda said, reducing screen time.
• 20:20
  Carrie went to a health and Wellness retreat with no tech,
• 20:23
  no alcohol and no meat, and she said it was awesome as a reset.
• 20:28
  And then Dana said going through a divorce, that was her reset,
• 20:31
  which I can well imagine would make you feel like you needed a
• 20:35
  reset. I also think protecting your
• 20:38
  energy is part of a reset because you know how you get so
• 20:44
  drained and like whether it's going out a lot or scheduling a
• 20:48
  lot of things with your girlfriends during the day, you
• 20:52
  know, just a time to reset your energy because people can ZAP
• 20:57
  that energy really quickly, whether it's your kids, your
• 21:00
  relatives, your husband. So like protecting your energy
• 21:04
  when you're doing your reset I think.
• 21:07
  I think so too. I think there are all kinds of
• 21:09
  resets and I love hearing how everybody defines them.
• 21:15
  Why don't we take a quick break? Because Speaking of resets, we
• 21:18
  always give you organizational tips.
• 21:19
  We're going to take a quick break and we're going to come
• 21:21
  back with something organizational, so stay tuned.
• 21:26
  So we're back and the organizational tip for our reset
• 21:30
  episode is what? I the reason why I came up with
• 21:34
  this one is because I was at a client's house and the first
• 21:37
  thing I noticed is a professional organizer is
• 21:41
  countertops. I don't care where it is,
• 21:44
  kitchen, bathroom, laundry room, if you have an island in your
• 21:48
  club, whatever it is, if there is stuff on the countertops, it
• 21:54
  basically will roll into every other part of your day because
• 21:59
  you're it shows to me you are overwhelmed.
• 22:03
  And so having a place for everything will get the items
• 22:07
  off the countertops, because cluttered countertops equals
• 22:11
  cluttered mind. So when there's clutter on my
• 22:14
  countertop, I won't think twice about hanging my purse up
• 22:18
  because I'm like, oh, you know what?
• 22:19
  There's already something on the countertop.
• 22:20
  Let me just add, add this to that.
• 22:22
  So and then I'll clear it all at once, which takes whoever knows
• 22:25
  how long. So there you go.
• 22:27
  Kind of like that broken window theory that I've read about
• 22:30
  where if a window's broken in a neighborhood, that's the first,
• 22:34
  the gateway to all kinds of things being let go because you
• 22:37
  feel like who? Who is watching?
• 22:39
  Nobody. 'S there, right?
• 22:41
  I totally agree. One thing leads to another leads
• 22:44
  to another, and I see it all the time.
• 22:47
  So if you can at least take one countertop today and clear it
• 22:52
  off and make note in your mind how that made you feel when you
• 22:56
  walk by the kitchen counter or the bathroom counter, just make
• 23:00
  a note. Let me know.
• 23:02
  All right, so we're going to close our show.
• 23:03
  Let's see if this works for a good show closing.
• 23:06
  So whether it's a whether it's to make your muscles bigger or
• 23:11
  or to clear your mind, if if it's giving you cystic acne,
• 23:17
  then you can let it go. And don't look back.